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Dory Shafrir
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Elise Hu
You know, before I lived in LA, I traveled to LA and those trips back and forth showed me that they don't call it the City of Angels for nothing. The sky is blue, the weather is gorgeous, and the food is amazing. Los Angeles chefs and mixologists draw inspiration from their varied cultural backgrounds and the city's diverse neighborhoods, making for a really exciting food scene. From game changing taco trucks to Michelin stars. If you're not a foodie, LA also has diverse cultures and communities that collaborate and mingle, elevating new voices in art, music, film and comedy. Did you know that Los Angeles has more museums and theaters than New York? From trailblazing street art to world class museums, art is everywhere in la. Plus LA knows how to put on a show. The worlds of sports and entertainment collide to create the kinds of events that could only happen here. Wherever you are in the city, you're never far from the next only in LA moment. Find more ways to love LA@discoverla.com hello and welcome to Forever 35, a podcast about the things we do to take care of ourselves. I'm Dory Shafrier.
Dory Shafrir
And I'm Elise Hu and we are just two friends who like to talk a lot about serums.
Elise Hu
And this is a mini episode where we hear from you, we share your comments and your thoughts, and we answer your questions to the best of our ability. But please remember we are not experts, we're podcast hosts and we always encourage you to seek support first and foremost from a medical and or mental health professional as needed.
Dory Shafrir
We love your questions though.
Elise Hu
We do.
Dory Shafrir
And we've been. We've been in a real season of great questions and voicemails and texts from folks because I think we're all leaning on each other to take better care of each other during these dark and tumultuous times. We live in interesting times.
Elise Hu
That is. That is. That is certainly one way of putting it. Elise yes we do.
Dory Shafrir
That's my most cheerful way of putting it yet because I have been like, we're in a full on dystopia. But I'm trying to keep it, keep it, keep it a little bit more even. I'm trying to keep it a little bit more even. And part of the reason is because I'm already at midlife. Like there's so many younger people like the ones that we brought into this world who, you know, have so much more life ahead. And so I think we do have a responsibility to them to try and do for sure.
Elise Hu
Yeah.
Dory Shafrir
And also, like, it's really hopeful for me to be around kids. Like I have been spending a lot of time around kids as part of my documentary filmmaking. And like, they're just putting one foot in front of the other. Part of that is the benefit of not having to be alive to see a bunch of decay. You know, like, maybe we are more cynical because we remember a time, like a different time, a time when the, when politics wasn't like this and you could have policy differences, but not like differences on whether your marginalized group should even exist. You know, that, that things have gotten a lot more existential in a short amount of time. Yeah. But then, you know, we, I think that the pendulum does swing and so you have to imagine that like we can try and visualize a more affirmative way forward. So I'm trying, I'm trying to like keep it together at least this week. Check again. Check again next week.
Elise Hu
Yeah, exactly.
Dory Shafrir
When this comes out, your, your in laws are going to be in town, so you'll be in the middle of a visit. How long, how long is that gonna, Is that visit lasting? Is it a long stay? Is it a short stay?
Elise Hu
No. By the time this airs, they will be just about on the way back to their home.
Dory Shafrir
Okay. Okay.
Elise Hu
So yeah, they're not, they're not here for that long.
Dory Shafrir
Are there other grandkids? So does Henry have a bunch of cousins?
Elise Hu
He does on both sides. Okay. Cousins on my side are all close in age to him. He's the youngest of five cousins and the oldest is about to turn ten. So it's like a ten year old, a nine year old, an eight year old, a seven year old, and he'll be a six year old. Oh, that's, everyone's like very close in age, which is fun. And then his cousins on Matt's side are much older because Matt is the youngest of four by seven years is his next oldest and his brother had kids really young, like in his early 20s. So he has. His brother has kids who are in their 20s, and then his sister has a kid who's in high school.
Dory Shafrir
Okay. Okay. Yeah. Because Matt was the caboose of his own family.
Elise Hu
Matt was the caboose, and then his especially. His brother especially had kids quite young. So his brother's like a year older than me and has kids in their 20s. He has a daughter who's married. You know, like, it's like they're just. It's just a different. It's almost like it's a different generation. It feels like.
Dory Shafrir
Yeah, it seems like it. Okay, cool.
Elise Hu
Elise, I actually have something that I. That I need to discuss with you and our listeners. In the. In, like, the grand scheme of things, it is relatively inconsequential, but I have just lost, like, all motivation to cook dinner.
Dory Shafrir
Huh. When did this happen? When did. When did you lose it? Where did you lose it?
Elise Hu
I don't know. I think it's partly because Henry has, like, a very. It's not like, super limited. Like, he does eat foods. It's just like, the foods he will eat are. Are pretty basic. It's like, he'll eat turkey burgers, he'll eat noodles. He'll. You know what I mean? And, like, I don't like to make two separate meals. Like, I just. Like, that's just too much. So I will. And. And, like, I will often make a meal that I know he'll only eat, like, one part of.
Dory Shafrir
Huh.
Elise Hu
But I just sort of, like, lost the will. Like, for a while. I was posting on our. Like, I had a magnetic, like, dry.
Dory Shafrir
Erase menus that you were doing.
Elise Hu
I was doing a weekly menu. And that was actually great in the sense of, like, I knew what I was making every night. And then I just sort of, like, lost steam on that. And then the other night, I made the saddest dinner I've ever made. It was. I was like, well, I'm gonna make a protein, a vegetable, and a carb. So I made. I just, like, sauteed some ground turkey, and I was like, well, I'm gonna put some garlic powder and some soy sauce in this. What?
Dory Shafrir
Okay. I like garlic. Anything.
Elise Hu
Yeah, so I sauteed that. Then I just, like, steamed some broccoli, and I made some, like, pearled couscous. And I just, like, put it out on the table. And Henry was like, mama, why did you make meatballs that aren't stuck together?
Dory Shafrir
It's deconstructed. You deconstructed?
Elise Hu
It was just like a. Like a bowl of, like, ground turkey. I don't know. It just. It. Nothing looked appetizing. And I was. I was, like, sitting there, I was, like, putting food on my plate. I was like, it's actually quite tasty. And Matt and Henry were just both looking at me like, what the hell? Henry ate some couscous and some broccoli, but, like, it was just so sad. And I was like, I don't know.
Dory Shafrir
Do y'all share duties? Does Matt, like, have his nights or his weeks or.
Elise Hu
Matt does the dishes.
Dory Shafrir
Oh, okay. That's the way you break it down.
Elise Hu
He does all the dishes. I hate doing dishes. So that is you.
Dory Shafrir
Do you hate that more than cooking?
Elise Hu
Yes, I would rather cook. And Matt will occasionally cook. He is actually a good cook, but I feel like he tends to, like, over complicate things. Like, he'll be like, I'm go make the America's Test Kitchen version of a turkey burger. And it's, you know, and it's like 25 ingredients, steps, and takes three hours. And you're like.
Dory Shafrir
And it's.
Elise Hu
This is really tasty, but it's not like, it's not exponentially tastier than the. Than like the regular turkey burger that I already. Right. Do you know what I'm saying?
Dory Shafrir
Yeah. Yeah.
Elise Hu
So, yeah, I don't know. I just. I feel like I'm just in a rut of food, and I. I need some. I need some suggestions from you, from listeners. We've done this before. I've asked for dinner recommendations before, and I need a. I need, like, a refresher.
Dory Shafrir
My mind is immediately going to. Maybe it's corn pasta season.
Elise Hu
Oh, I do love corn pasta.
Dory Shafrir
I was going to say maybe it's about time to bring back the old Forever 35 favorite corn pasta.
Elise Hu
I did, you know, I got Costco, had corn not that long ago. So I don't know where it is corn season already, but it was corn season at Costco, and so I got some corn and. And used it to make some corn pasta. That was maybe like a month ago. So, yeah, the corn pasta is always a hit. You're right. You're right. Okay.
Dory Shafrir
Some part of the world. Yeah.
Elise Hu
Yeah.
Dory Shafrir
And then you have had good luck, I think, with feeding your family with some of the Trader Joe's bagged frozen dinners. Right. Like the Kung Pao chicken or the orange chicken.
Elise Hu
It's been a mixed bag. I did make the orange make. I did. I did heat up the orange chicken recently, and it was, like, fine. You know, it wasn't great, but it was fine. Those meals are also, like, very high in sodium, so I. I try not to, like, rely on them too much because I could have high blood pressure. We don't know. Got it.
Dory Shafrir
Well, you have to find out. You'll have to find out.
Elise Hu
All right. Call.
Dory Shafrir
Right. Text.
Elise Hu
Yeah.
Dory Shafrir
Any suggestions for Dory to break her rut?
Elise Hu
Yeah, please. We. I need those. I'm. I'm. I'm, like, writing into my own podcast with a question. That's how this works, right?
Dory Shafrir
I was going to say, well, what's the. What's the point of having a podcast if you can't shout out to your own audience your questions?
Elise Hu
It's so true. Okay, well, Elise, let's take a little break, because then we do have some questions from our listeners. And before we take that break, you can write into us or call into us at 781-591-0390. You can text us at that number. You can email us at forever35podcastmail.com we have our website, forever35podcast.com we've links there to everything we mentioned here on the show. We're on Instagram @forever35podcast. We have our newsletter atforever35podcast.com newsletter and you can shop our favorite products at Shopmy Us. Slashforever35 and we are going to take a short break. And we'll be right back.
Dory Shafrir
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Elise Hu
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Dory Shafrir
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Elise Hu
We are back and we're still getting emails and texts and stuff about Friendship Month which I love. So we got this email from a listener named Adrian, and she said, I wanted to tell you both how much I appreciated Friendship Month. I'm a new mom, and becoming a mom has really shifted the dynamics in a lot of my friendships. I had one very close friendship completely fall apart, while others have strengthened. So this series came at a valuable time for me. I learned so much from all of the guests, and I enjoyed hearing the experiences of the callers. And your reactions, specifically your responses to the listener whose friend is struggling with depression and anxiety, were so affirming for me. My close friendship fell apart because my friend was not addressing her role in some serious issues in her marriage and was bringing a negativity into our friendship that I wasn't able to handle at the time. With everything going on in my own life, I've felt a lot of guilt about not being able to be there for my friend when she was so clearly struggling. And I've had a deep sense of grief over the loss of that relationship. I'm working to forgive myself for my own limitations and accept that I do not have infinite energy or emotional capacity. To that listener, I would say, if you're still having fun with this friend and are enjoying spending time with her, then great, keep on keeping on and let your friend worry about her own problems. But if the friend's anxiety and depression are affecting your relationship, it's okay to step back. Sometimes our friends burdens can hijack a friendship and the positive aspects of the relationship fall away. It doesn't mean you love them any less or have done anything wrong if you decide to step back. With love, Adriene.
Dory Shafrir
Yeah, our friendships have seasons, you know, and then there's also that old saw about people are in your life for a reason. A season or a lifetime. And I have had so many friends. I was just with with my college roommate and her wife at Indian Wells at the tennis tournament a couple weeks ago. And I was just reflecting on the fact that we have been friends since we were 19. So like almost 25 years now. Wow. And how over those 25 years, sometimes we were really, really close. Like check in with each other every day because we had Google Chat or Google messenger, whatever that was. Like in G Chat, where you could gchat. Yeah, we were constantly on chat and then after that platform went away, like it actually changed our friendship where we just didn't check in with each other every day anymore. And then there were times where like, you know, I was annoyed by this or that and pulled away myself. And we Never really fully talked about it, but we just like started right back up again once we saw each other again. And so it just made me reflect on this kind of conversation, this wider conversation we've been having during Friendship Month. Just about how there's times when you're tighter, there's times when you might be disconnected for a little bit, but that doesn't mean the friendship is over. You know, it just takes a call or a quick check in or a connection to. To start it back up if you want to. But yeah, a lot of our, all of our situations, especially relationally, are co created, so both people have to be in, you know, and yeah, that was a really lovely sentiment. So thank you.
Elise Hu
I think it's also, you know, it's so hard to admit to yourself that you don't have the bandwidth or you have, like, limitations when it comes to your capacity for friendship. Yeah, like, that's really hard.
Dory Shafrir
So I had, I had one. One friend. Right. On this theme, actually. I was having coffee just yesterday or the day before with a mom friend of mine, and she was saying that she felt as though like one of her friendships had become really one way in this way where she was giving, giving, giving, and then the other friend was not. Was kind of taking that for granted.
Elise Hu
Yes.
Dory Shafrir
And then she had to pull back basically because she didn't want to continue enabling that dynamic in which it was always like one way. And she, this friend was calling her like three or four times a day to venture, you know, and at one point she was just like, I don't think I have, you know, I have two young kids, you know, I have my partner. I have like all these other things going on.
Elise Hu
And then.
Dory Shafrir
And it wasn't too directional. It wasn't like, where she could also vent. And so she was like, I think I need to step back. And I'm like, that's. You're completely, that's completely valid. Like you can step back and it doesn't mean the friendship is over or anything. Yeah, just take a break. There's seasons.
Elise Hu
Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. And then we got another text from someone who had some questions for us. I loved your Friendship Month series, but had lingering friendship questions that did not get addressed. I have complete confidence that you two could give me your opinions or experience with these situations. One is politics. I have mostly friends that share the same political views as me, but have one friend in particular that is a vocal Trump supporter. We align on most other aspects of our lives and have the best times together. But since the election. I've been avoiding this friend and feeling like I just can't reconcile this huge difference in our viewpoints. How the heck do you all navigate this second friendship issue? Can you have a friendship where your friend doesn't like or approve of your spouse? I've been on both ends of this scenario, and it feels like a friendship deal breaker, but not.
Dory Shafrir
Sure thoughts on the Trump supporter friend? I guess I would want to know a little bit more about, like, what kind of friend, you know, like, is this your closest friend of all time? Because it sounds like y'all have a lot of good times together, but this isn't your bestie, that you're like, ride or die bestie. And in that case, it seems like there's two choices. One is you just don't talk about politics, but if she's very vocal, then I don't know how you avoid it. And then the other is that, you know, the friendship is not so close anymore because to me, my nearest and dearest have to generally be on the same operating system as me and have, like, the same values and just believe in truth and human rights and like some ideas about equity and inclusion that clearly the Trump administration is not behind and in fact trying to dismantle. And so because, and the reason why this is important to me is because I need you and my other friends to hold me accountable sometimes and provide counsel. And if I know that we don't share the same value system, yes, we can still be friendly, but we'll only ever be so close because then I'd be less likely to ask you for advice, for example, and I would more likely keep things on the surface. So, caller or listener, I would say, you know, you could do that. You could keep things on the surface or you could cut it off. What would you say, dor?
Elise Hu
Well, I also had a question which was, you know, you said we align on most other aspects of our lives. This feels like such a big thing that it's like, I don't, like, I don't, I don't get how you align on most other aspects of your lives because to me, this would, like, bleed into everything.
Dory Shafrir
Yeah. Like bodily autonomy, reproductive rights, so many things.
Elise Hu
I do kind of think that if we are in a position of privilege, it is, like, sort of incumbent upon us to make it clear that this is, like, not okay for our friends. And, like, you don't get to be friends with me if this is how you feel. I don't know. Is that, do you think that's, like, short sighted, like do you think it's better to like keep these people close so that when they, you know, and hopefully, you know, try to like change their mind? What do you like, what do you think?
Dory Shafrir
I don't want to be so quick to like equate one person's voting position or how they stand on like issues, I guess, to their entire identity. It's just though, it's just that this is different than even like Bush v. Gore or something.
Elise Hu
Yeah, Obama. Right. Like, this feels so extreme that it, it feels hard to have that stance, I think to me, I don't know. Yeah, so, okay, we didn't really like, that's the exact.
Dory Shafrir
So it was kind of like.
Elise Hu
But that's.
Dory Shafrir
No, I mean, the same thing stands, right? Like just that you could go, you could go surface level or you can decide like where your values align and don't align and then have to make a decision about the larger friendship itself.
Elise Hu
Yes. Okay. And then second friendship issue. Can you have a friendship where your friend doesn't like or approve of your spouse?
Dory Shafrir
Yeah, you can. I think that you might have to respect that they'll want, that friend will want one on one time with you and not necessarily want to hang out with you and your spouse all the time, you know, and if that's a deal breaker for you because it's this, you know, it's your spouse that they may not get along with, then that will be tougher. You know, I, I, me and my brother actually have a situation like this because my brother's wife, so my sister in law and I like had this major blowout at Thanksgiving in like 2018. And ever since then, my sister in law and I like try to avoid not getting like, we, we hang out together in like big groups, but we don't hang out together like just for adults or something. And my brother kind of knows this and he said to me after that big blow up, he was like, I can, I can't really take your side because this is my wife, you know, and I, we sleep in the same bed every night. But he's like, I get it. You know, and you two have very different personalities and think very differently on things and la, la la. And he's like, so we'll just hang out one on one. And he's like, so, you know, you're my sister, I love you. Like, let's just, we're gonna have to hang out one on one. And when we do family stuff, we'll all be together, obviously. But he was like, when, when you and I Just need to catch up like the original Hughes and just catch up. Then we'll just hang out one on one, and we just kind of did it that way.
Elise Hu
Okay. Yeah, I. I agree. It doesn't have to be a deal breaker unless the nature of your friendship was like, a couple's friendship and you only ever hung out as couples. But it seems to me like you could have an individual relationship with someone and not have to deal with their spouse. Okay, we are going to take another short break, and we will be right back. All right, we are back. So first I'm going to play voicemail.
Listener
Hi, Therese. Long time, long time calling. And I'm loving all of the friendship commentary. It has obviously been a pillar for your show for many years. And my top recommendation for one single activity to make friends as an adult is community theater. It covers so many of the friendship factors for in person, real time experiences. There's a layer of thrill that amplifies the bond with your cast. And it is absolutely a friendship fast track after spending a few weeks or months working with the cast. And my personal favorite part is that it's also a rare intergenerational space that, depending on the show, means you could be making friends with seniors or kids who are all sharing the same activity. And if you're not keen on performing, assisting backstage is also super rewarding and usually easy to access because you can never have too many volunteers to help with the show. Anyways, thanks.
Elise Hu
Love ya.
Dory Shafrir
Oh, and then you have a show at the end, too. You've made something that you're all proud of, and it existed in time and space.
Elise Hu
Totally. So I thought, like, in addition to the friendship stuff, this was also a good, like, going back to things you may have loved as a kid kind of thing. You know, a lot of us were in school plays and haven't done anything with that since then. Although, you know, waiting for Guffman was certainly inspirational.
Dory Shafrir
That's one of my favorite movies. I just love all that Christopher Guest stuff.
Elise Hu
It's just so good. All right. And we got this email that I also wanted to share. Hi, Door and L. I'm into these, like, you know, attempts at.
Dory Shafrir
Oh, yeah, the. The last message had. Had Bento Doris. Yeah, I like that. Okay.
Elise Hu
All right. Dory's journey with tennis is really resonating with me. After my daughter was born in 2022, I needed a new physical outlet. Pre baby. I did hot yoga and played ultimate frisbee Post baby. I never felt like I could make it to a yoga class on time. I still played ultimate, but the timing of games generally wasn't great. For also parenting. Enter indoor rock climbing, a sport where you can show up whenever and won't interrupt a downward facing dog or miss half a game. I had many friends who already climbed and were varying skill levels. So at 34 and four months postpartum, I picked up a new hobby. At first it was very humbling and it often still is. But it's a sport where it is very easy to track your progress. Can you make it up a climb you couldn't before? Yay. Are you trying things in a harder difficulty level? Amazing. Now, two and a half years later, I'm fully obsessed and think about it constantly. I try to climb at least three times a week and just got back from my third ever outdoor climbing trip. Don't worry, I wore a UPF 50 shirt the whole time. Yes. Love to hear it. Despite how active I've always been, I also feel like I'm in the best shape of my life. I can do pull ups. Three of them in a row. You flexed arm hang?
Dory Shafrir
Oh, totally, totally.
Elise Hu
Yes. All this is to say, Dory, you and I are both incredible for starting something new and being unashamed about how much it means to us. All the best to both of you.
Dory Shafrir
Michelle, that is awesome.
Elise Hu
I love this for you as someone who my. My upper body strength, it's just.
Dory Shafrir
Yes, same. Yes. I talked about this. That. That flexed arm hang created so much anxiety for me in my youth because it was part of the presidential physical fitness test. And then you had to just be over that bar and they would time you on how long you could do it. And I just remember like sucking at that. So bad. But climbing is so good for your upper body strength and your lats. My co director on the fire documentary like climbs anytime he has free time. So he'll come into LA and then get off the plane before he even gets here to meet me. He like goes and climbs for a couple hours. So it's just the fact that you can just drop in on a climbing gym.
Elise Hu
Totally, totally. Yeah. Yeah, it sounds very cool. I. I will not be taking up this hobby. But that's okay. I don't need to. Yeah.
Dory Shafrir
You have tennis. You have your own.
Elise Hu
I have tennis. On a totally different note, we've gotten quite a few texts saying how great righteous gemstones is.
Dory Shafrir
Walton Goggins is in it. The great Walton Goggins.
Elise Hu
Yes. That was. I mean, that was what led to this whole conversation. So yeah, I actually just want to play one voicemail about this because it was Nick really made me laugh.
Dory Shafrir
Oh my God Dory. I mean I call all the time but had to pause the pod when you mentioned the Righteous Gems. It is the most undersold show on hbo, maybe on any network. I think it is so funny. It is so well done. John Goodman Chef's Kiss But Walton Goggin is such a gangster actor. Like he just does it all and he does it all well. He's the center of me and my friends meme chats that we share all the time. So I really hope you keep watching and that you enjoy it as much as we do. And okay, bye. Yay.
Elise Hu
Yay. Thank you for that. Yes, I do plan on continuing to watch, so thank you. All right everybody, it's great getting to chat with all of you. Elise, great getting to chat with you as always.
Dory Shafrir
Excellent voicemails folks.
Elise Hu
Yes, keep them coming. 781-591-0390. We will talk to you soon. Take care. Bye bye bye.
Dory Shafrir
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Elise Hu
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Forever35 Podcast Summary
Episode: Mini-Ep 436: You’re Incredible, We’re Incredible
Release Date: March 26, 2025
Hosts: Doree Shafrir & Elise Hu
In this engaging mini-episode of Forever35, hosts Doree Shafrir and Elise Hu delve into the intricacies of maintaining meaningful friendships, especially during challenging times. With a blend of humor and heartfelt conversation, they explore how friendships evolve, the impact of external stressors, and the importance of mutual support.
Elise's Culinary Struggles
Elise opens up about her recent loss of motivation to cook dinner, a challenge many parents can relate to. Struggling to cater to her son Henry's limited palate, Elise shares her frustrations with meal planning and the emotional toll of trying to please everyone at the dinner table.
"I just sort of lost the will... And Henry was like, 'mama, why did you make meatballs that aren't stuck together?'"
— Elise Hu [07:44]
Doree's Supportive Approach
Doree empathizes with Elise, reflecting on her own experiences with household duties and offering a compassionate perspective on balancing responsibilities.
As part of their Friendship Month series, Doree and Elise address listener emails and questions, providing thoughtful advice and sharing personal anecdotes.
Adriene's Story on Shifting Friendships
Adriene writes about how becoming a new mom altered her friendships, leading to both strengthened bonds and the painful end of a close friendship. She grapples with guilt over not being able to support a friend struggling with depression and anxiety.
"If you're still having fun with this friend and are enjoying spending time with her, then great... But if the friend's anxiety and depression are affecting your relationship, it's okay to step back."
— Addressing Adriene [17:54]
Hosts Reflect on Long-Term Friendships
Doree shares a personal reflection on her 25-year friendship with her college roommate, highlighting how communication platforms and life changes can influence the closeness of a relationship.
"Our friendships have seasons... sometimes we were really, really close... and then we just like started right back up again once we saw each other."
— Doree Shafrir [18:07]
Balancing One-Sided Friendships
Doree discusses a listener's situation where a friendship became one-sided, emphasizing the validity of stepping back to preserve one's emotional well-being.
"You can step back and it doesn't mean the friendship is over or anything. Yeah, just take a break. There's seasons."
— Doree Shafrir [20:49]
A listener inquires about maintaining a friendship with a vocal Trump supporter amidst differing political views.
Doree's Perspective on Value Alignment
Doree suggests evaluating the depth of the friendship and whether political differences outweigh shared values. She emphasizes the importance of aligning on core values for meaningful support and accountability.
"You could keep things on the surface or you could cut it off. What would you say?"
— Doree Shafrir [21:43]
Elise's Emphasis on Privilege and Responsibility
Elise adds that those in positions of privilege should advocate for equality and may need to distance themselves if a friend's political stance undermines these values.
"I think that if we are in a position of privilege, it is like sort of incumbent upon us to make it clear that this is not okay for our friends."
— Elise Hu [23:36]
Friend Disapproval of a Spouse
A listener asks if it's possible to maintain a friendship when their friend disapproves of their spouse.
Respecting Different Boundaries
Doree shares her own experience where her sister-in-law and she avoid one-on-one interactions post-conflict but maintain a cordial relationship in group settings.
"We just kind of did it that way."
— Doree Shafrir [25:16]
Elise's Encouragement for Individual Relationships
Elise agrees, advocating for sustaining individual bonds without the necessity of engaging with the disapproving spouse.
Community Theater as a Friendship Catalyst
A listener recommends community theater as an excellent activity for making new friends, highlighting its intergenerational appeal and collaborative nature.
"Community theater covers so many of the friendship factors for in-person, real-time experiences... it's a friendship fast track."
— Listener Voicemail [27:20]
Hobby Stories: Indoor Rock Climbing and Tennis
Elise shares a listener's inspiring journey into indoor rock climbing, emphasizing the joy and physical benefits of embracing new hobbies in adulthood.
"Now, two and a half years later, I'm fully obsessed and think about it constantly."
— Listener Email [29:13]
Doree reciprocates by discussing her passion for tennis, showcasing how personal hobbies contribute to self-care and confidence.
The hosts take a moment to acknowledge praise from listeners about the HBO show Righteous Gemstones, particularly lauding Walton Goggins' performance.
"It's the most undersold show on HBO... Walton Goggins is such a gangster actor."
— Listener Voicemail [32:09]
Doree and Elise wrap up the episode by reinforcing the value of maintaining and nurturing friendships through various life changes and challenges. They encourage listeners to continue sharing their stories and seeking support within their communities.
"Elise, great getting to chat with you as always."
— Doree Shafrir [33:10]
In this heartfelt episode, Forever35 successfully intertwines personal anecdotes with listener interactions to explore the evolving nature of friendships. Doree Shafrir and Elise Hu offer sincere advice, empathy, and relatable experiences, making the episode a valuable resource for anyone navigating the complexities of adult friendships.
Notable Quotes with Timestamps:
"If you're still having fun with this friend and are enjoying spending time with her, then great... But if the friend's anxiety and depression are affecting your relationship, it's okay to step back." — Adriene [17:54]
"Our friendships have seasons... sometimes we were really, really close... and then we just like started right back up again once we saw each other." — Doree Shafrir [18:07]
"I think that if we are in a position of privilege, it is like sort of incumbent upon us to make it clear that this is not okay for our friends." — Elise Hu [23:36]
"Community theater covers so many of the friendship factors for in-person, real-time experiences... it's a friendship fast track." — Listener Voicemail [27:20]
"Now, two and a half years later, I'm fully obsessed and think about it constantly." — Listener Email [29:13]
This comprehensive summary encapsulates the essence of Forever35's Mini-Ep 436, providing both prospective and existing listeners with a clear overview of the episodes' key discussions and takeaways.