Mini-Ep 444: Spilling the Tee

Summary

Forever35 Podcast: Mini-Episode 444 – "Spilling the Tee"

Release Date: May 21, 2025

In this engaging mini-episode of Forever35, co-hosts Doree Shafrir and Elise Hu dive into listener interactions, personal anecdotes, and thoughtful discussions on self-care and personal growth. Skipping the promotional segments, the episode focuses on meaningful conversations that resonate with the listeners. Here's a comprehensive summary of the key moments and insights shared.

---

1. Welcome and Introduction

Timestamp: [02:33] – [02:54]

Doree and Elise kick off the episode by introducing the format of this mini-episode:

Doree Shafrir:
"And this is a Mini episode where we hear from you, we share your comments and your thoughts, and we answer your questions to the best of our ability." [02:38]

They emphasize that while they offer valuable insights, they are not experts and always recommend consulting professionals when necessary.

---

2. Elise's New York Adventure

Timestamp: [02:57] – [08:59]

Elise Hu recounts her recent trip to New York, highlighting both the bustling, sunny days and the unexpected rainy weather:

Elise Hu:
"When the sun did come out on Saturday and Sunday, like, everyone was out and there was that sense of joy and bliss in the air and, like a liberation, you know?" [04:38]

She shares a memorable evening spent at a rooftop in the West Village with friends, describing the spontaneous and magical encounters that New York City is renowned for. A standout moment includes encountering friends Kara and David, whose unique rooftop residence adds to the evening's charm.

---

3. Doree's Birthday Celebrations

Timestamp: [09:00] – [12:49]

Doree Shafrir details her recent birthday weekend, filled with thoughtful gestures from her family:

• Henry decorates her bedroom with balloons and flowers, including a special heart-shaped balloon that reads "Best Mom."
• A relaxing massage and a delightful lunch with Matt.
• A homemade strawberry shortcake cake, although a sushi mishap with Sugarfish left her feeling under the weather.

Despite the minor setback, Doree celebrates the quality time spent with loved ones and the joy of starting a new show with Matt:

Doree Shafrir:
"It's very silly. I don't. I think Traders, like, on the whole, is a better show, but it's very entertaining and, like, it scratches the itch." [11:05]

---

4. Team Dynamics in Tennis

Timestamp: [12:49] – [15:13]

The hosts discuss their experiences with their tennis teams, contrasting their supportive, team-oriented environment with a more competitive country club team:

Doree Shafrir:
"So I do feel like we have a good, like, team dynamic, but that just really sort of like, illustrated it for mercy." [12:48]

They highlight the importance of camaraderie and mutual support in fostering a positive and motivating atmosphere, ultimately sharing satisfaction in their team's performance against the country club rivals.

---

5. Listener Recommendations: T-Shirts

Timestamp: [15:13] – [23:16]

The episode transitions to listener interactions, focusing on T-shirt recommendations for summer:

• Marine Layer T-Shirts: Recommended for their high quality and ethical manufacturing practices.

  Doree Shafrir:
  "They are super high quality. I've had some that lasted me for years and years." [21:06]

• Everlane Air Tee: A loose-fitting, lightweight option currently on sale.

  Doree Shafrir:
  "It's a nice summery loose fitting T shirt." [22:36]

• Athleta's Ease Crop Tee: Highlighted for its soft, lightweight fabric and versatile style.

  Listener Emily from Nashville:
  "It has a dolman sleeve that's loose and drapey and the sleeves hit kind of just above your elbow." [21:06]

Additionally, Cocokind’s Ceramide Lip Blur is recommended as a fragrance-free, hypoallergenic lip gloss suitable for sensitive skin.

---

6. Listener Question: Bikini Line Hair Removal

Timestamp: [25:00] – [28:35]

A listener seeks advice on sensitive bikini line hair removal methods, avoiding shaving and waxing. Doree and Elise share their experiences and suggestions:

Elise Hu:
"I wax, but I also… I get folliculitis, which are those little bumps." [26:03]

They discuss the merits and drawbacks of different methods, including laser hair removal:

Doree Shafrir:
"Laser hair removal is great if you have the right kind of hair for it. It doesn't work on every shade of skin and hair color combination." [27:03]

The hosts encourage listeners to share their preferred methods and experiences, fostering a community of shared advice and support.

---

7. Listener Email: Navigating an Impending Layoff

Timestamp: [28:44] – [33:27]

Allie, a listener facing her second layoff in five years, reaches out seeking advice on feeling jaded and uninspired professionally while balancing motherhood.

Elise Hu offers compassionate advice:

"We have learned especially in American society to over associate our work with our worthiness. And we really need to break that link because your work isn't the be all and end all of who you are." [31:40]

She suggests performing a "Life Audit" to realign with personal values and find joy beyond professional achievements. Doree adds her support, emphasizing the importance of reclaiming one's sense of self outside the pressures of late-stage capitalism.

---

8. Final Listener Recommendation: Julia Tirschen’s Cookbooks

Timestamp: [33:11] – [33:26]

A final listener recommendation highlights Julia Tirschen's cookbooks, praised for their versatility and user-friendly recipes:

"I cook from Simply Julia and What Goes With What all the time. I love that she offers lots of substitutes. Ingredient lists aren't too long and it's all delish." [33:11]

---

Closing Thoughts

Throughout the episode, Doree and Elise foster a sense of community by addressing listener questions with empathy and practical advice. Their genuine interactions and thoughtful discussions underscore the podcast's commitment to self-care and personal growth, making Mini-Episode 444: "Spilling the Tee" a valuable and relatable listen for their audience.

---

Thank you for tuning into Forever35. Stay connected with Doree and Elise on Instagram @forever35podcast and join their newsletter at forever35podcast.com for more insights and updates.

Transcript

[Dory Shafrir]

If you, like me, are looking to give your daily summer uniform an upgrade, I really recommend checking out Quince. Their pieces are easy, elevated and somehow make me feel more put together without even trying. I'm excited to try some 100% European linen shorts and dresses from just $30 this summer. I mean, is there anything more chic than being just effortlessly cool in the midst of a heat wave? Plus they have luxe swimwear, Italian leather platform sandals and so much more available on their site. I'm also about to pull the trigger on their 100 organic cotton poplin Pintuck maxi skirt, which looks like the perfect lightweight stylish skirt for summer. And I feel like I'm going to wear this all the time. Everything with quince is priced 50 to 80% less than what you'd find at similar brands. By working directly with top artisans, Quints gives you luxury without the markup, and Quint only works with factories that use safe, ethical and responsible manufacturing practices and premium fabrics and finishes. Treat your closet to a little summer glow up with quint. Go to quint.comforever35 for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. That's Q-U-I-N C E.comforever35 to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quint.comforever35 you know, a lot of people hear LA or Los Angeles and think only of the celebrities here and the movies that are made here. But but there's so much more to love about the city I call home now. From walk up windows and rooftop bars to year round al fresco dining, Los Angeles is a culinary thrill ride sure to leave visitors hungry for more tacos or sushi. Brazilian or Korean food from anywhere in the world can be found right here in la. And when you're done eating, there's shopping or there's hikes all around la. Or just get a taste for fame firsthand by attending a star ceremony on Hollywood Boulevard. Catch a glimpse behind the scenes at a world famous studio tour. Need a breather? Don't forget to stop in your tracks and look up. Soak in our legendary blue sky. That's the light that inspires directors around the world. We love LA. Find more ways to love [e-mail] hello and welcome to Forever 35, a podcast about the things we do to take care of ourselves. I'm Dory Shafrier.

[Elise Hu]

And I'm Elise Hu and we're just two friends who like to talk a lot about serums.

[Dory Shafrir]

And this is a Mini episode where we hear from you, we share your comments and your thoughts, and we answer your questions to the best of our ability. But please remember, we are podcast hosts. We are not experts. We always encourage you to seek support, first and foremost, from a medical and or mental health professional as needed.

[Elise Hu]

That is right. That is right. That's true.

[Dory Shafrir]

How's it going, Elise?

[Elise Hu]

It's going great. I am back from New York. I had a lovely spring weekend in New York.

[Dory Shafrir]

How was your trip?

[Elise Hu]

A lot of the days were just like, everybody is out with their dogs and their babies because the weather's so balmy, and then you have that, like, aqua blue skies. But when I first got there, it was very rainy. And I think you sent me an article about how it had been rainy. Yeah, but that's such east coast bias. Like, totally. When it rains here, it's also a big deal, but we never get a story about it. But yeah, like, when the sun did come out on Saturday and Sunday, like, everyone was out and there was that sense of joy and bliss in the air and, like a liberation, you know? And yes, it was lovely. And we had so much fun in that that I was there to do the convening for the Met. A creative convening for the Met Little museum. Perhaps you've heard of it. It's actually a large, sprawling museum, it turns out. Indeed. And I got lost trying to find the exhibition for which our convening was associated with. And So I had one hour to see the actual exhibition and spent 35 minutes getting lost. I was like, among the knife and the chain mail for a while, and that wasn't it. That wasn't the chinoiserie. So I was doing something on, like, Asian beauty and chinoiserie, and then I found myself in, like, Medieval Times.

[Dory Shafrir]

Oh, my gosh.

[Elise Hu]

It's just a large, sprawling museum. But I was so that that program was very thought provoking. And I came away from it just, like, bouncing. Lots of ideas bouncing around my head. But what was so special about being in New York when, like, everybody is out and about is, like, those New York nights where lots of random things happen and you run into. And people run into people, and, like, one thing turns to another turns to another because it. Because of the density of New York.

[Dory Shafrir]

Totally.

[Elise Hu]

And because you're not driving place to place and everybody kind of knows somebody else who might have a hookup to something else. And so I did kind of the touristy thing or, like, the more traditional classic New York things of, like, eating at Joe Allen and catching A show. And the show that I caught, the now that has 10 Tony nominations, maybe happy ending was just thrilling and heart swelling. And it was just like such a great rom com. And Rob didn't want to see it. And as we were leaving, he was like, this was so worth seeing. It was so well done. But then the New York night that turned out so great was it kind of had that feeling of like just the perfect alchemy of people and then being able to be outdoors. We wound up on the rooftop of a West Village, like, row house where my friends Kara and David, who are usually in la, but happened to be spending time at their West Village place for the next month or so. They happened to come out that night and they were like, you know, we started off at a bar and then wanted to find another bar, but where do you find a place on a Friday night that can seat or have enough room for 10 of us? And so then Kara and David and Cara was kind of like, already high on gummies. And David's always golly, like, David has a real Paul Rudd energy and kind of looks like Paul Rudd too. And Carol is like, well, we're already in the West Village, which is like two blocks from my house. Do you guys just want to come to my house? And the group was just walking along. And so most of the group, it wasn't apparent to them that we were like, going to Kara and David's house for the next.

[Dory Shafrir]

Oh, my gosh, that's so funny.

[Elise Hu]

And what's so deceiving is they have like an odd apartment in that. It's a storefront. So it's like on. It's the first floor of a row house in the West Village where there's lots of restaurants and other. And bars and stuff that are their neighbors. But then their place is a residence. And so you just walk straight into it, and it's their apartment. And they have these windows up front that with a click of a button, they can turn the windows from where you can see everything inside to then blurry. And you just press a button and it's so cool. And so we were playing with that. But then, because they weren't planning on having people over, they had just cooked broccoli that night before they left the house to come meet us at the bar. So we walked in and were blasted with the smell of broccoli.

[Dory Shafrir]

Oh, my God.

[Elise Hu]

And Kara was like, sorry, we just. We just cooked broccoli. We just. And then Rob, Rob said under his breath, and he was like, yeah, yeah, everybody welcome to Bar Akali. And nobody heard his joke, so nobody was there to, like, laugh at his joke. And he needed all of us to laugh at his joke. And he's like, barak. Luckily. And then everybody got it. It was hilarious. And then they have. They have, like, a rooftop deck, you know, up top, because they own the. The first floor. And then they have tenants in the second, third, and fourth floor. And then, you know, we went up to the roof and just all sat around. And it was just like a random amalgam of my friends from various parts of my life. Like, one I met in Kuala Lumpur and one I met in Michigan when I was speaking in Michigan one time. And two of them were, like, some of my oldest friends. And it was just Rob's cousin Max, who lives in Bushwick, came over. The artist, you know, the sculptor. It was just such a random group. And that's exactly what I love about New York. Right. Like, that you can go from one thing, it morphs to another and morphs to another. So the rest of the trip was great. But I'm always gonna remember that particular night because it was so emblematic of what makes New York a really magical place.

[Dory Shafrir]

That's so fun.

[Elise Hu]

Yeah. And you. It was your birthday weekend, and I didn't get to, like, see you on your birthday. We are going to celebrate still. But tell us what you did for your birthday weekend.

[Dory Shafrir]

On Friday, when I woke up, Matt and Henry brought, like, a bunch of balloons and flowers and cards into the bedroom. Henry is very. Was very sweet and had, like, picked out specific balloons. He also, for Mother's Day, had gotten me this, like, little balloon on a stick that's a heart, and it says Best mom on it. And he, over the last, like, week, has just been coming up to me, like, waving it in my face. And I'm like, I am. I'm the best mom. And he's like, best mom. Best mom.

[Elise Hu]

Oh, I hope he never loses that.

[Dory Shafrir]

I know. It was very sweet. He wrote his. He wrote a card for me. Like, it was. It was really sweet. Then I got a massage.

[Elise Hu]

That's right. Good. How did you like it?

[Dory Shafrir]

It was great. Then. And Matt drove me there and picked me up so I didn't have to drive, which was the best. And then he and I got lunch, and then I just kind of relaxed for a little bit. And then he picked Henry up from school, and they made me a cake. They made me a strawberry shortcake, which was.

[Elise Hu]

Oh.

[Dory Shafrir]

Kind of cake that I wanted. And I also got sugarfish, which is Sushi, and I'm pretty sure it made me sick. So that was kind of a bummer because at first I was like, maybe it was the cake. And then I was like, wait, Matt. Neither Matt nor Henry got sick, and I was the only one who got sugar fish because Matt doesn't really like sushi and Henry doesn't eat sushi. So I was like, okay, it was definitely the sugar fish. I was like, that toro roll did taste a little off, so. So that was a bummer, but it was fine. Matt and I also started watching a new show together, which is the Netflix version of Traders. It's called Million Dollar Secret.

[Elise Hu]

Does it cover up?

[Dory Shafrir]

It's very silly. I don't. I think Traders, like, on the whole, is. Is a better show, but it's very entertaining and, like, it scratches the itch. And it's Peter Serafinowitz in the Alan Cumming role, and he is sort of, like, similarly campy, but not in, like, not in as gay a way as Alan Cumming is, but he's like a heightened version of himself. And, yeah, it's entertaining. Like, we're enjoying it. Good. That was fun. Then Saturday, I took Henry to soccer and then took him to a birthday party. And then I went to watch my tennis team win, which was fun.

[Elise Hu]

Yay.

[Dory Shafrir]

Yeah, we had this. It was interesting. So there aren't enough. The. The spring season of tennis is five matches per match. Five lines of tennis per match, which is a lot. So you need a lot of courts to play, like, every line. And so the place where we play doesn't have enough courts for us to play all at once. So the matches are staggered. So we play two lines at two and three lines at four. And I thought it was so interesting. The other team, it's like this sort of fancy country club team. As each of them finished their matches, they were just like, bye. And they all left. And my team, like, stayed and cheered for their teammates, which I thought was like, yeah, the nice, normal thing, having a team. Yeah, exactly. And it was. It was just, like, such an interesting vibe. Like, these women were all just like.

[Elise Hu]

Yeah, individualist, versus more.

[Dory Shafrir]

Like, they were all just like, we're out.

[Elise Hu]

Yeah.

[Dory Shafrir]

So I do feel like we have a good, like, team dynamic, but that just really sort of like, illustrated it for mercy. Yeah. Like, these. These people do not care about the other people on the team. They're just there to play their match and leave. They could not care less, and they lost all their matches. So.

[Elise Hu]

Maybe there is something to.

[Dory Shafrir]

I'm just Saying, yeah. I mean, I just think, like, when you feel more invested and when, you know, you actually, like, get along with the people on your team and they're, like, nice, normal people. I don't know what these women are like on this other team, but, like, it is a country club team, so there's already sort of a level of something else there. And it is satisfying to beat a club team because, like, they have coaches and they have courts available all the time. And, you know, it's. It's like a different level. And, like, we're just this, like, scrappy public court team, and we all like each other and they seem to not like each other, so. Anyway, Elise, we should. We should take a little break before we do that, though, we did get one text from someone that I want to read, which was Dory. Hoping your book project is tennis related. You're so passionate about it. I bet it would be amazing. It is not tennis related. That's not to say that I couldn't write something tennis related. At some point.

[Elise Hu]

You could pivot.

[Dory Shafrir]

Yeah, I could pivot. I know. I. I feel like there's a world where I, like, start writing something else and then go back to the manuscript that I am ostensibly working on now because I feel like I need. I need. My brain needs to be, like, jiggled in some sort of way. I don't know what's going on. All right, before we take a break, please call and text us. These mini apps are all about you. We answer your comments and questions. 781-591-0390 is our phone number. You can call or text us there. You can email [e-mail] we have our website, forever35podcast.com. We have links there to everything we mentioned on the show. We are on Instagram @forever35podcast and we have a newsletter @forever35podcast.com. Elise, I don't know if you remember, a listener recently was asking for T shirt recommendations. And after the break, we have some T shirt recommendations.

[Elise Hu]

Okay, can't wait.

[Dory Shafrir]

All right, we'll be right back. If you, like me, are looking to give your daily summer uniform an upgrade. I really recommend checking out quints. Their pieces are easy, elevated, and somehow make me feel more put together without even trying to. I'm excited to try some 100% European linen shorts and dresses from just $30 this summer. I mean, is there anything more chic than being just effortlessly cool in the midst of a heat wave? Plus, they've luxe swimwear, Italian leather platform sandals and so much more available on their site. I'm also about to pull the trigger on their 100% organic cotton poplin Pintuck Maxi skirt, which looks like the perfect lightweight, stylish skirt for summer. And I feel like I'm going to wear this all the time. Everything with Quint is priced 50 to 80% less than what you'd find at similar brands. By working directly with top artisans, Quince gives you luxury without the markup, and Quints only works with factories that use safe, ethical and responsible manufacturing practices and premium fabrics and finishes. Treat your closet to a little summer glow up with quint. Go to quince.comfore35 for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. That's Q-U-I-N C E.comfore35 to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quint.comfore35 how many of us have gone through a whole 12 step skincare routine and then been like, hm, I don't actually think this is working well. That's because the $150 billion skincare industry isn't giving you the full story. In the new Skin Health series on Masterclass, world class dermatologists and a top cosmetic chemist break down what's real, what's a scam, and how to actually get stronger, healthier skin for life. Learn what works and what's just hype. With trusted skin experts guiding the way with short, easy to watch episodes, this class is an encyclopedia for all things skin. Think of it as a toolkit to take control of your skin health at any age. For any skin type. Masterclass is the only streaming platform where you can learn and grow with over 200 of the world's best for just $10 a month billed annually, a membership with Masterclass gets you unlimited access to every single instructor. It's an amazing deal and Forever 35 listeners always get great discounts on Masterclass of at least 15% off any annual [e-mail] forever35 See MasterClass's latest deal at least 15% [e-mail] forever35 masterclass.com forever35 I recently got a fiddle leaf fig tree from fast growing trees and I'm obsessed. In fact, I'm looking at it right now. It's perfectly at home in my office. It's right by the window. It seems really happy, I'm not gonna lie. And I just loved how it was delivered in this box. Like all nicely packaged, super healthy. Highly recommend if you don't know Fast Growing Trees it's the biggest online nursery in the US with thousands of different plants and over 2 million happy customers. They have all the plants your yard needs like fruit trees, privacy trees, flowering trees, shrubs and so much more. They also have indoor plants like the fiddle leaf fig tree that I have. So whatever plants you're interested in, Fast Growing Trees has you covered. Find the perfect fit for your climate and space. Fast Growing Trees makes it easy to get your dream yard. You can order online and get your plants delivered directly to your door and in just a few days without ever leaving home. Their alive and thrive guarantee ensures your plants arrive happy and healthy. Plus get support from trained plant experts on call to help you plan your landscape, choose the right plants and learn how to care for them. This spring they have the best deals for your yard, up to half off on select plants and other deals and listeners to our show get 15% off their first purchase when using code Forever35 at checkout. That's an additional 15% off at fastgrowingtrees.com using the code Forever35 at checkout fastgrowingtrees.com code Forever35 Now's the perfect time to plant. Use Forever35 to save today. Offer is valid for a limited time. Terms and conditions may apply. Fresh air, sunshine and good food. That's what spring is all about. And HelloFresh makes it easier to fit quick home cooked meals into your schedule every week by curating delicious recipes like Pasta Primavera, Chicken Dijon and Pecan Crusted Trout as well as over 100 seasonal snacks, sides and treats. In 2025, HelloFresh is evolving to fit every lifestyle by bringing customers even more convenience without compromising on taste, health or homemade quality. Their new Ready Made meals offer chef crafted, flavorful dishes that are ready in just three minutes so you can dig in and get outside, get work done or just get some me time. I recently made one of my family's favorite HelloFresh meals, the Onion Crunch Chicken with mashed potatoes and green beans. It was so flavorful, so delicious and easy. Every HelloFresh meal uses high quality ingredients including seasonal fresh produce and proteins that travel from the farm to your doorstep. Feel great with meals that fit your spring schedule and make the season even more delicious. Go to hellofresh.com forever35 10fm now to get 10 free meals with a free item for life, one per box with active subscription free meals applied as discount on first box. New subscribers only. Varies by plan. All right, we are back as promised. We do have some T shirt recommendations. The first one I'm going to, it's, it's a voicemail, so I'm going to play this voicemail.

[C]

Hi ladies. I am calling in response to the caller who was asking for recommendations on the sort of perfect running around summer T shirt. I also live in jeans and T shirts most of the year. I live in Southern California, so that's kind of a all the time uniform. I also second Elisa's recommendation about the Madewell T shirts. I think all of them are great and they do have a variety of styles and cuts. But I also wanted to recommend the Marine Layer T shirts. They are super high quality. I've had some that lasted me for years and years. You can sometimes they have sales and they can get a bundle of three, I think at a discounted price. It's a company that started in San Francisco, California. So I think they have some good, like, you know, like a good ethos sort of built into their brand and they're like a local American company. So I think they're a good one to support. So I definitely recommend that.

[Dory Shafrir]

Okay. Marine layer. I feel like I've heard people recommend Marine Layer before. Have you ever worn their stuff, Elise?

[Elise Hu]

I haven't. I love the brand, but I don't have T shirts from them. I just went to the website to look up their tees and it looks like they do have sales on men's tees right now, like three for a certain amount of money. But then also they have a lot of cropped tees. So if you are kind of shorter waisted, longer legged like I am, it's a nice crop tee. Would be nice for ambling around or bouncing around in. So I'll check it out.

[Dory Shafrir]

Okay.

[Elise Hu]

Any other, any other recs?

[Dory Shafrir]

Yes, we also got, we got a text recommending the Everlane Air tea which I looked at. It's, it looks like a nice loose fitting, lightweight tea crew neck. It is $38. But I just want to note that Everlane is having a 25 off sale for Memorial Day and that is through May 26th. So you have five days. So that seemed like a good wreck if that's sort of the, the style. Not, not if you're looking for like a fitted, more fitted shirt. But this looked like a nice summery loose fitting T shirt.

[D]

Hey, this is Emily from Nashville, longtime listener calling in with two recs for you. For the caller that was looking for T shirt recommendations, the longer sleeves Athleta with Ease crop tee. It has a dolman sleeve that's loose and drapey and the sleeves hit kind of just above your elbow. It's made of a very soft, lightweight fabric that makes it super comfy. You could work out in it, of course, but I usually just wear it around for traveling. It also looks cute. Great everyday T shirt. Second rack specifically for all of our sensitive skin fragrance free life Cocokind lip gloss. I think they call it their ceramide lip blur. They are labeling it as the first hypoallergenic lip gloss and the first lip gloss or at least the first that I've ever been able to find without fragrance. Great ingredients. No fragrance. Comes in like six colors and it's $12 at Ulta. I think you can also buy it on the website, but great. I love it. I get eczema around my lips, so that makes lipstick, lip gloss, lip color nearly impossible. So really excited about this product, Dory. I think you would like it.

[Dory Shafrir]

Thanks.

[D]

Bye.

[Dory Shafrir]

All right.

[Elise Hu]

Thank you.

[Dory Shafrir]

Thank you.

[Elise Hu]

Yeah. Two great wrecks.

[Dory Shafrir]

Two great wrecks. All right. We have another request for listener feedback. This is a text we got. Hi, Dorian, Elise. Now that we're entering the start of summer and pool season here on the east coast, I'd love to hear from you and listeners on what people are using on their bikini lines. Not shaving or waxing because I'm too sensitive for either of those options. I keep getting ads for creams like bush balm, but given that I grew up in the days of Nair, I'm a little wary. Help, please. Thanks.

[Elise Hu]

I also grew up in the days of Nair. I remember using it a couple times.

[Dory Shafrir]

And like, nope, I was always scared of Nair.

[Elise Hu]

Yeah, you were right to be fearful. Also, like, I'm really, I'm really sort of skeptical of chemicals that can just like make your hair die. Like just kill your hair.

[Dory Shafrir]

I think you should be skeptical of those chemicals. Like, those chemicals seem really scary, right?

[Elise Hu]

Is it napalm? Oh, my gosh. Anyway, yeah, listeners, that's a call out for you. I wax, but I also when, when I. So I go to queen bee, shout out to queen bee salon and spot for my waxes upstairs and downstairs. And with my downstairs waxes, I actually, they told me I couldn't go too frequently. So before I was going like every three or four weeks. And they now they have me on a six week rotation because I get folliculitis, which are those little bumps. And so and then they have to do that, like therapy, that light therapy or whatever, that wand. And it's more work for them to have to do that. So now they're just like, don't come too often. You're on a six week plan. But listeners, what are y' all doing? I also get kinds. I get like Instagram ads for all these new ways of hair removal, like new devices and things for hair removal. And I don't know which ones are good and which ones aren't. So let us know. Door. Is there anything you recommend?

[Dory Shafrir]

I mean, I got my bikini line lasered like 15 years ago because waxing gave me folliculitis. And then I would pick at it and it was just. It was not a good situation. So I just ended up getting it lasered with like, I think I got like a Groupon to Bliss in New York. It was when I still lived in New York. So this, this will tell you how long ago it was and it takes a few sessions. But like, laser hair removal is great if you have the right kind of hair for it. It doesn't work on, on every shade of skin and hair color combination. So you have to find out if you are a candidate. But if you are pale with dark hair, that's like the best combo apparently for a laser. So laser just zaps it right off.

[Elise Hu]

I'm so glad I did it for my armpits. So I did laser hair removal for my armpit hair and I never bother with it ever again or I haven't bothered with it ever again. With bikini line. I did several treatments, but then it still wasn't that effective. And then I didn't want to spend any more money. So I was just like, whatever, I hear you.

[Dory Shafrir]

I hear you.

[Elise Hu]

Yeah. But listeners, let us know what the latest innovations are in this. In this area.

[Dory Shafrir]

Yeah. Also, if you have used bush balm in particular, let us know. All right, Elise, we are going to take another break and when we come back, we have a listener who needs our help with an impending layoff.

[Elise Hu]

Okay, we'll be right back.

[Dory Shafrir]

All right, we are back. Elise, you want to take this one?

[Elise Hu]

Yeah. Here is an email from a listener. Hi, Elise and Dory. I am facing a layoff at work and it's my second layoff in five years. As a result, I'm feeling really jaded and uninspired professionally. I feel like I'm just sort of drifting right now and have very little drive to look for a new job. I'm wondering if you or any listeners can speak to feeling like you've lost your spark or drive professionally. What have you done to help find your way? I'm also A mom to a two and a half year old and plan on keeping my daughter home from daycare two days per week this summer and trying to find contract work for the other three days. Any advice anyone has on navigating these types of shifts, both as a professional and as a parent, are welcome. Thanks so much, Allie. Yeah. The adrift feeling. The adrift feeling. Um, I haven't had. See the thing about layoffs, which I find to be such a violation, is that they weren't of your own volition. Like you didn't get to choose the terms of leaving, which then can feel kind of jarring. And then it sounds like Ally's dealing with two in a row, two inside of five years.

[Dory Shafrir]

Yes.

[Elise Hu]

And I guess the, the way that I responded to a lot of this happening in our field in journalism and in media was to become less loyal to institutions. So over the course of my career I went from somebody who like went to work for a giant corporation like I was at a Hearst television station and then you know, at Gannett and all these like big companies that provided retirement matching and health insurance and all those things. And then over the years started to like not find the trade offs worth it that much and feel as though the security that they promise when they hire you was always a bit of a mirage. And you could argue that the through line to how I wound up being a freelancer, somebody who really works for no major institution, is that feeling of precariousness. And so one of the ways that I have dealt with the uncertainty is to try and work for myself. But then you're trading one kind of hustle for another kind of hustle. So one way to kind of take a, take an audit is I actually, I actually got a book called the Life Audit. And it can help you figure out your values and who you are and what brings you joy. So. And it's kind of like a workbook. So I think that is somewhat helpful. You know, you don't have to, you don't have to go through it like page by page, but that might be helpful to just kind of reflect and think about your values, especially while you have the time to do so.

[Dory Shafrir]

Yeah.

[Elise Hu]

And I'm so sorry by the way, that you're going through this and that and to anybody else who's going through this because it is such a jarring thing. And then the other thing to remember, of course. Yeah. Is that we have learned especially in American society to over associate our work with our worthiness. And we really need to break that link because Your work isn't the be all and end all of who you are and how worthy you are and what you can contribute to society and the world and your family, for instance. So you have a really young child right now. You have a toddler. And so I think it's pretty awesome that you're going to get to spend so much more time with them, with her this summer. And so cherish that. Remember we only have 4,000 weeks on earth and see what you can do to return to your values, your core values and what really makes you happy on a soul level. So much of what we do with work culture is to chase ego driven things or what we're taught to value. But my advice for Allie is to return to who she really is at the emotional engine or core. What about you, Dora?

[Dory Shafrir]

I love this advice. I feel like I have nothing to add. I mean this is like, yes, I agree with everything you said and I'm sorry that this is happening. Like I just, I hate this late stage capitalist hellhole. Anyway, just one last text we got from someone saying that they highly recommend Julia Tirschen's cookbooks. I cook from Simply Julia and what goes with what all the time. I love that she offers lots of substitutes. Ingredient lists aren't too long and it's all delish. I have Simply Julia I believe and it is a great book.

[Elise Hu]

Ooh. Okay.

[Dory Shafrir]

Highly recommend. All right everyone. Thank you so much, Elise. Great to catch up.

[Elise Hu]

Absolutely back at you and listeners. We'll talk to you next time.

[Dory Shafrir]

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