In this Mindfulness in Action episode, I’m exploring what it means to not only add value, but to let ourselves feel valued.

So many of us are working hard to matter. We’re trying to contribute, perform, improve, achieve, help, and show up for other people. But even when we are adding value, we may not actually let the feeling of mattering land. We move so quickly that we miss the evidence that we are seen, appreciated, and needed.

This episode is deeply personal for me. I share a reflection on the loss of Isaac Prilleltensky, whose work on mattering has profoundly shaped my life, my research, and the book I’m writing. Isaac embodied mattering in the way he made people feel seen and valued, and his encouragement helped me keep going when I needed it most.

From there, I guide you through a short mindfulness and reflection practice to help you remember a time when someone made you feel valued. We’ll practice noticing not just the thought of that moment, but how it felt in the body. The warmth, lightness, relief, energy, or connection that can come when we allow ourselves to receive care, recognition, or support.

Because mattering is not only about what we give, it's also about what we are willing to receive.

Top 5 Takeaways

Mattering has two sides: It includes both adding value and feeling valued.
Many of us struggle to let feeling valued land: Compliments, help, encouragement, and recognition can be uncomfortable to receive.
Feeling valued is embodied: It can show up as warmth, lightness, relief, energy, or a sense of connection.
Accepting help allows others to add value too: Receiving is not a burden; it can deepen connection and mattering on both sides.
What we focus on, we begin to notice: Practicing awareness of where we feel valued can help us see more evidence of mattering in everyday life.

LINKS

What It Really Means to Matter
How to Build a Life of Contribution with Tom Rath
Other Mindfulness in Action episodes

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The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.