1st Nighter 1952-07-20 Speak Ever So Gently

Summary

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Podcast Summary: Harold's Old Time Radio – "1st Nighter 1952-07-20: Speak Ever So Gently"

Episode Date: October 22, 2025
Host: Harold's Old Time Radio
Featured Radio Play: "Speak Ever So Gently" (Original air date: July 20, 1952)
Genre: Comedy-Romance

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Overview

This episode of Harold's Old Time Radio features a full-length staging of "Speak Ever So Gently," a comedic romance from the classic "First Nighter" program. Set against the backdrop of Hollywood publicity antics and small-town Americana, the play follows movie star David Stanley and his savvy agent, Kit Marshall, as they're drawn into a whirlwind scheme to dedicate a children's home in Beaver, Ohio. After an initial focus on publicity, the story takes a heartfelt turn as both characters confront personal transformation and unexpected attachments in the wake of a measles quarantine.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Setting the Scene and the Stakes (02:37–05:18)

• Hollywood vs. Heartland:
  Kit Marshall, fast-talking publicity agent, persuades reluctant movie star David Stanley to attend the dedication of a children's home in Beaver, Ohio, for the sake of a major publicity stunt.

• Comic Banter Highlighting Cynicism:
  Their exchanges humorously pit Kit's ruthless publicist instincts against David's disinterest in children and staged sentiment.

  • Quote:
    David Stanley: "Me dedicate a children’s home in where?"
    Kit Marshall: "Beaver, Ohio." (03:19–03:20)

  • Quote:
    David Stanley: "I never dedicated anything in my life and I won’t start now. Especially with kids. I don’t get along with kids. I'm allergic to them." (04:25–04:32)

• The Classic 'Contract Clause' Gag:
  Kit invokes David's contract, humorously threatening to make him do even more embarrassing things should he refuse.

  • Quote:
    Kit Marshall: "If I want you to crawl on your hands and knees down Hollywood Boulevard, you’d crawl. If I want you to swim to Catalina, you’d swim. And if I want you to dedicate a children's home in Badger, Ohio, dad." (04:52–05:15)

2. Arrival in Small-Town USA — Misdirected Expectations (05:32–09:35)

• Comic Arrival:
  Their slapstick arrival at Beaver feels anticlimactic—no crowd, no fanfare, just the mayor’s daughter greeting them.

  • Quote:
    David Stanley: "Platform’s empty as a tomb. Worse. Empty as last year’s love affair." (08:01–08:04)

• Twist:
  The town’s dignity overrides publicity: the mayor’s daughter Roxanne discouraged all announcements, wanting the visit to remain unpublicized out of respect for the children.

  • Quote:
    Roxanne Horton: "We wouldn’t soil a warm, earthy gesture with publicity. Not a word to the paper, not a word to the town. Nobody knows you’re in Beaver, Mr. Stanley. Not a single soul. Isn’t that wonderful?" (09:22–09:35)

3. Unwelcome Surprises — Awkward Hospitality (10:53–13:19)

• Eccentric Lodging:
  David is installed in a bedroom filled with the town mayor’s taxidermy collection, further underlining his outsider status.

  • Quote:
    Kit Marshall: "That’s the zoo."
    David Stanley: "Animals. Millions of animals in there. Shut the door, quick. They might stampede. Shut the door." (11:54–11:59)
  • Quote:
    Kit Marshall: "I had them moved from the den into your room. From your last picture, I thought that… you do like animals, don’t you? The movie magazines are always pointing out how fond you are of dogs and horses and lions and things." (12:00–12:10)

• Roxanne's Sharp Wit:
  The mayor’s daughter, Roxanne, matches wits with both Kit and David, her frank and grounded attitude contrasting the city slickers.

4. Local Chaos — Publicity Finds a Way (13:13–17:22)

• Word Gets Out Anyway:
  Despite the intention to keep things quiet, Kit inadvertently sparks townwide excitement about the Hollywood star’s presence.

  • Quote:
    Kit Marshall (at the local bank): "May I use your telephone? I want to call David Stanley. No, no, not long distance. He’s at the mayor’s house. Well, he certainly is. Call up yourself if you don’t believe me. But the whole town’s upside down. How could they have found out he was here at our house? I can’t imagine." (13:57–14:24)

• Pandemonium Ensues:
  The house becomes besieged by townsfolk eager for a glimpse of David, highlighting the unstoppable force of local gossip.

5. Heartfelt Comedy — The Measles Quarantine (17:47–19:30)

• 'Measles' Twist:
  The children’s home is quarantined for measles, trapping Kit, David, and Roxanne alongside the children for two weeks.

  • Quote:
    Kit Marshall: "Measles. Here in the home. Quarantine this afternoon. Measles. David, drop that child." (19:20–19:30)

• Forced Togetherness:
  The quarantine premise sets up both comedic tension and unexpected intimacy as everyone is pressed into active care of the children.

6. Transformations and Changing Hearts (24:00–26:39)

• Character Growth:
  The motley group (especially David and Kit) is gradually won over by the children. Previously reluctant, David turns out to be nurturing and gentle, telling stories and helping with chores.

  • Quote:
    Kit Marshall: "You've been telling Millie bedtime stories?"
    David Stanley: "Sure. I'm pretty handy at it too… She'll miss you, David. We all will." (25:47–25:52)

• Kit’s Confession:
  Kit admits her previous cynicism was misplaced, expressing genuine affection and respect for David's transformation.

  • Quote:
    Kit Marshall: "I thought you were coming to Beaver just because it would make good copy for the papers… These past two weeks you’ve been wonderful. The kids love you. You can’t fool them. You couldn’t fool little Millie, and you couldn’t fool me. David, you’re… you’re a very real person." (25:52–26:34)

7. Conclusion — Return to the World (28:03–29:54)

• Endings (and a Misunderstanding):
  As the quarantine ends, there’s comic confusion: Kit thinks David wants to marry Roxanne, but he actually means adopting little Millie.

  • Quote:
    David Stanley: "Kit, I've got to go back." (28:28)
    Kit Marshall: "Back to Beaver?" (28:28)
    David Stanley: "I've got to." (28:31)
  • Quote:
    David Stanley: "You and I will have a great time. I can adopt her."
    Kit Marshall: "Adopt her? Are you insane?" (28:54–28:59)

• Romantic Realization:
  The misunderstanding brings to light Kit's own feelings for David. The play closes on a tender romantic admission between the two leads.

  • Quote:
    Kit Marshall: "I've waited three years to see that look on your face." (29:27)
    David Stanley: "Maybe I better hold you together." (29:37)

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Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

• On Hollywood’s Absurdity:
  David Stanley: "Hollywood is cockeyed, you know why? Well, it's because actors have agents like you. And agents don't have blood in their veins. Only crazy publicity stunts." (03:09–03:19)

• On Small Town Quietude:
  David Stanley: "Platform's empty as a tomb. Worse. Empty as last year’s love affair." (08:01–08:04)

• On Forced Celebrity:
  Kit Marshall: "Now you know how Custer felt at Bunker Hill, Valley Forge, the Alamo." (16:43–16:45)

• Warmth and Change:
  Kit Marshall: "You can’t feed them and bathe them, take their temperatures and play games and try to wish every measles spot off of them without... oh, call me soft headed. Go on. Call me soft headed, but soft hearted? Do me." (27:06–27:20)

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Key Timestamps

• Arriving in Beaver: 05:32–08:01
• Discovering No Fan Fare: 08:00–08:35
• Publicity Reversal: 09:22–09:35
• 'Zoo' Bedroom Scene: 11:50–12:10
• Children’s Home Measles Quarantine: 19:13–19:30
• Bonding with the Orphans: 24:00–25:52
• Kit’s Apology and Romantic Realization: 25:52–26:39
• Comic Adoption/Misunderstanding: 28:54–29:16
• Tender Final Confession: 29:27–29:50

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Tone and Language

The episode maintains the clever, rapid-fire repartee characteristic of 1950s radio comedies, blending sarcastic banter with moments of genuine sentiment. The language is playful, with Kit and David’s smart, sometimes biting exchanges slowly giving way to warmer, heartfelt dialogue as the play progresses.

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Final Thoughts

"Speak Ever So Gently" offers both laughter and heart, poking fun at Hollywood’s excesses while celebrating the simplicity and warmth of small-town America. The episode is a delightful sample of Golden Age radio, featuring strong comedic timing and an ultimately touching narrative arc. Long-time fans and newcomers alike will appreciate both the period charm and the timeless message about genuine kindness outshining publicity.

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Transcript

[Kit Marshall]

Hey, this is Sarah. Look, I'm standing out front of a.m. p.m. Right now and, well, you're sweet and all, but I found something more fulfilling. Even kind of cheesy. But I like it. Sure, you met some of my dietary needs, but they've just got it all. So farewell, oatmeal. So long, you strange soggy.

[David Stanley]

Break up with bland breakfast and taste.

[Kit Marshall]

AM PM's bacon, egg and cheese biscuit.

[David Stanley]

Made with K tree eggs, smoked bacon and melty cheese on a buttery biscuit. AM PM Too much. Good stuff. The First Nighter Program. Starring Olin Soule and Barbara Luddy. Theater time, Broadway. And here we are ready to attend another thrilling premiere at the famous Little Theater off Times Square. Yes, it's one of the most exciting events on the Great White Way. An opening night. And here is our host for the evening. The genial First Nighter, Ry Bilsbury. Good evening. I'm delighted you could join us. Tonight's play, I hear, is exceptionally good. Here's my cab. Won't you step in? All right, driver. To the Little Theater up Broadway, across 42nd street and into the greatest nighttime playground in the world. There ahead is the Little Theater off Times Square. Well, here we are. Have your tickets ready, please. Have your tickets ready, please. Good evening, Mr. First Night Of. The Usher will show you to your seats. Thank you. We'll go right in. Here we are, ladies and gentlemen. And in the packed house. We're surrounded by people whose names are news. But let me tell you about the play. It's a comedy romance entitled Speak Ever so Gently by Peggy Blake. Our two stars, Barbara Luddy and Olin Soule. Mr. Soule is cast as a motion picture star and Barbara Luddy as his publicity agent. And the all star supporting cast are Betty Lou Gerson as Roxanne. Mary McGovern is Millie and Eddie Firestone. Curtain. First curtain. There's the signal for first curtain. The house lights are out and here's the play.

[Kit Marshall]

Think of it, David. You dedicating a children's home. A home for poor unfortunate children in Beaver, Ohio. You coming down off the silver screen to make this lovable human gesture. America's favorite actor emerging from Hollywood as Atlantis emerged from the ocean.

[David Stanley]

Atlantis didn't emerge. Atlantis sank. You get what I mean?

[Kit Marshall]

I talked it over with Brinker and with Duffy and with Schmaltz. The studio is behind us 107%. They agree it's the greatest publicity stunt in this cockeyed town's cockeyed history.

[David Stanley]

Don't be vulgar, dear.

[Kit Marshall]

Are you telling me that Hollywood isn't cockeyed?

[David Stanley]

It is. And you know why? Well, it's because actors have agents like you. And agents don't have blood in their veins. Only crazy publicity stunts. Me dedicate a children's home in where?

[Kit Marshall]

Beaver, Ohio.

[David Stanley]

Oh, brother.

[Kit Marshall]

And a neater idea I never did have. I can see it now. The small town, ivy covered cottages, the old church clock peeling on the hour. Simple folk wending their way home through elm shaded streets after a day of honest toil.

[David Stanley]

I think I'm going to be sick.

[Kit Marshall]

No, no, it's terrific. You, David Stanley, in this warm, earthy setting, being warm and earthy setting.

[David Stanley]

Kit, for three years you've been my agent. You've wangled appointments and pushed me through doors. You beat bosses over their egg shaped heads. You've had me seen in the right places with the right people when nobody.

[Kit Marshall]

Else would touch you. Now remember that, David. The day you walked into my office, I said to myself, that boy could be sensational. I believed in you, didn't I? I fought a one woman war to get you into the studio, didn't I? And. And screamed like a mother tiger until I got you decent parts, didn't I? Sure. Okay. I am appealing to your better nature.

[David Stanley]

I hear you, but I don't feel anything. Kit, I am an actor.

[Kit Marshall]

Well, we won't argue.

[David Stanley]

I never dedicated anything in my life and I won't start now. Especially with kids. I don't get along with kids. I'm allergic to them.

[Kit Marshall]

Haven't you ever held a tiny baby in your arms?

[David Stanley]

No. Have you?

[Kit Marshall]

Once. With disastrous results.

[David Stanley]

So you admit it.

[Kit Marshall]

But these kids are from 5 to 12. Orphans with no families, no homes, no nothing.

[David Stanley]

I'll mail them a check in the morning.

[Kit Marshall]

In the morning you will be on a train aimed straight at Beaver, Ohio.

[David Stanley]

Not me.

[Kit Marshall]

You force me to remind you of a contract. Section B, paragraph 13, clause 9. In big bold letters it says that I am the sole and exclusive owner of the right to decide where, when and how you shall be publicized. If I want you to crawl on your hands and knees down Hollywood Boulevard, you'd crawl. If I want you to swim to Catalina, you'd swim. And if I want you to dedicate a children's home in Badger, Ohio, dad.

[David Stanley]

Blame it, you'll dedicate, you said Beaver, Ohio.

[Kit Marshall]

Beaver, Badger, Skunk Hollow. You'll go there, friend, and like it's.

[David Stanley]

A mournful sound probably announcing our arrival to the inmates of Beaver. When do we land?

[Kit Marshall]

In a couple of minutes. Porter has our Luggage. He's all ready to throw it off.

[David Stanley]

Throw it off?

[Kit Marshall]

Well, the train doesn't actually stop at Beaver. They tell me he just pauses long enough to snort.

[David Stanley]

Great. It's a lovely entrance I'll make, won't I? Everybody in the county at the station and me flying off the train smack onto my face.

[Kit Marshall]

Not your face, David. We'll need that for photographs.

[David Stanley]

Fine.

[Kit Marshall]

Buck up. Be public spirited, Be happy. I am.

[David Stanley]

Why not? You got your way.

[Kit Marshall]

Think of the sweet little tots you will be sponsoring. Sending them off on the road of.

[David Stanley]

Life and giving them the right to happiness. Don't make me cry, dear. My mascara.

[Kit Marshall]

You know who brings joy into the world? Children. What's nearest every man's heart? Children. What's nearest every woman's heart?

[David Stanley]

Me.

[Kit Marshall]

Children. Now, you might mention that to the crowd at the station.

[David Stanley]

You mention it, it drips off you like coating off a candied apple. Kit, you aren't serious about that stuff, are you?

[Kit Marshall]

No. Oh, that's us. Come on, David. Got your hat?

[David Stanley]

Yes, Mama.

[Kit Marshall]

Now, don't try to do any bowing until we reach solid ground.

[David Stanley]

Hey, where's the conductor?

[Kit Marshall]

Well, I haven't bumped into him since he asked me for your autograph. I told him he couldn't write.

[David Stanley]

Well, there's an open door. Where's the porter? I don't see our luggage anywhere. My striped trousers are in the alligator bag. I know, I know. We can always get me another alligator. You.

[Kit Marshall]

Hey. Idiot's moving.

[David Stanley]

Hurry up, Kit. Stand back. I'll jump first.

[Kit Marshall]

Every man for himself, huh?

[David Stanley]

I'll catch you. It's a cinch. I did it in Texas. Bandit, when the heroin was on the train.

[Kit Marshall]

I saw the picture. Do something.

[David Stanley]

Up, up and away.

[Kit Marshall]

Great.

[David Stanley]

Okay, Chuck.

[Kit Marshall]

Oh, David, don't leave me alone in Beaver. All right, don't rush me. Here I come.

[David Stanley]

All right, I'll catch you.

[Kit Marshall]

Hang on.

[David Stanley]

Don't worry. Don't worry. I've gotcha. I think. Who was griping about an entrance? That was colossal.

[Kit Marshall]

What a man. Stanley. Put me down, David.

[David Stanley]

Oh, sure.

[Kit Marshall]

Thank you.

[David Stanley]

Well, shouldn't the band be striking up? Shouldn't. Hey, look.

[Kit Marshall]

Look at what? David?

[David Stanley]

Is this beaver? Good night. We got off at the wrong place.

[Kit Marshall]

No, there's the sign on the depot.

[David Stanley]

But where is everybody? This is the day, isn't it?

[Kit Marshall]

This is the day.

[David Stanley]

Platform's empty as a tomb. Worse. Empty as last year's love affair.

[Kit Marshall]

Well, that shows how your mind works. David, this is terrible. Excuse me. What?

[David Stanley]

Who? Well, well, well, well.

[Kit Marshall]

Hello, Mr. Stanley.

[David Stanley]

Yes. Yes, Indeed.

[Kit Marshall]

Save it, David. We can get paid for that. I'm here to meet you, Mr. Stanley. On behalf of Beaver, I wish to welcome you. Can Beaver speak for itself? What?

[David Stanley]

Oh, this is my agent, Ms. Kit Marshall.

[Kit Marshall]

Oh, likewise. Where is Beaver? Beyond the hill. Burrowing away like mad, no doubt. I mean, where's the citizenry? Where's the woman's club? Where's the janitor? Where's the mayor? He's home. I'm his daughter.

[David Stanley]

She's the mayor's daughter, kid. She's the mayor's daughter. And I'm the traveling.

[Kit Marshall]

Never mind. You're the Ms. Marshall who wrote to my father. I guess. I guess. We had a gigantic correspondence. Plans were laid, beautiful plans. All about receptions and speeches and flowers and things. We practically fell in love with each other. Well, I talked to Daddy. I told him as far as Mr. Stanley was concerned, he was coming here for the dedication simply because he adores children. I told Daddy Mr. Stanley wouldn't want any publicity. And what did Daddy say? Oh, he said that was right. No publicity. We wouldn't soil a warm, earthy gesture with publicity. Not a word to the paper, not a word to the town. Nobody knows you're in Diva, Mr. Stanley. Not a single soul. Isn't that wonderful? Let me add her. Let me add her.

[David Stanley]

How?

[Kit Marshall]

Clippers will help me, David. I'll tear her limb from limb.

[David Stanley]

McCurtain comes down on the first act of tonight's play in the little theater off Times Square. Ladies and gentlemen, here is Vincent Pelletier with an important message. For the Republicans, it's Eisenhower and Nixon. For the Democrats, it's still a race to see who will come out ahead in party favor. This week is all important for the Democratic Party as they hold their national convention in Chicago. And you, the listener, will want to hear every history making development on this station. Direct from the Democratic National Convention. Beginning tomorrow, NBC's ACE News staff and technical crew, more than 300 people will bring you all of the news as it happens throughout the convention city. Tomorrow and every day of the convention. Be sure to make this NBC station your convention headquarters. Keep yourself up to date. Attend the Democratic Convention on NBC. The first night is a hurrying down the aisles to their seats. The lights are dim. And here's the second act of speak ever so gently.

[Kit Marshall]

I'll show you to your rooms. Peter will bring your luggage up later. The house is yours, Mr. Stanley. You don't know how we've looked forward to having you as our guest.

[David Stanley]

Well, that's very kind of you, Ms. Oh, gracious.

[Kit Marshall]

I didn't introduce myself, did I? Let's everybody call everybody butch. My name's Roxanne Horton.

[David Stanley]

Roxanne? Well, that's different.

[Kit Marshall]

It's from the place here in Oda. Bergerac. Mama was reading it when I was born.

[David Stanley]

Cyrano was the guy with a tremendous nose, wasn't he?

[Kit Marshall]

Mama said Daddy reminded her of Cyrano. So romantic and all.

[David Stanley]

Are the ladies in your family partial to romance?

[Kit Marshall]

Well, we wouldn't snub it if it tapped us on the shoulder. So often romance pokes you square in the teeth. That's my thought for the day. Are you Speaking from experience, Ms. Marshall? From observation, Ms. Horton. This is your room, Mr. Stanley.

[David Stanley]

Thank you. Hey, wait. Wait. I think you made a mistake. That's the zoo.

[Kit Marshall]

The zoo?

[David Stanley]

Animals. Millions of animals in there. Shut the door, quick. They might stampede. Shut the door.

[Kit Marshall]

They're dead.

[David Stanley]

Dead?

[Kit Marshall]

Yes. And staff. Daddy's hunting trophies. I had them moved from the den into your room. From your last picture, I thought that. You do like animals, don't you? The movie magazines are always pointing out how fond you are of dogs and horses and lions and things. Come in. Honestly, they're dead. Are you sure? I'll touch one. No, thanks. This is Alfred.

[David Stanley]

A tiger.

[Kit Marshall]

Daddy shot him in Asia. He measures six and a quarter feet.

[David Stanley]

Oh, that's nice.

[Kit Marshall]

And look over the mantel. What's that? Your father? It's a moose head. Well, I didn't know. Cyrano de Bergerac and everything. I hope you'll be very comfortable in here, Mr. Stanley. All of you.

[David Stanley]

Well, listen, I hate to crowd them. Wouldn't it be better if I. There must be a hotel even in Beaver.

[Kit Marshall]

Oh, we wouldn't think of it. Why, Daddy'd be heartbroken if you didn't stay with us. So would I. Well, luncheon's at 1. You'll have time to rest before then.

[David Stanley]

Rest? Were these ghouls staring at me? Couldn't close an eye. Bears and foxes and elephants and coyotes.

[Kit Marshall]

Oh, that isn't a coyote, Mr. Stanley. It's a wolf. Relax, David. You're among friends. Your room is across the hall, Miss Marshall. I'll show you.

[David Stanley]

Oh, Kit. Kit, you wouldn't desert me? Suppose they came to life or something? Me, all alone and unarmed, caught like a rat in a trap. Kit.

[Kit Marshall]

David, I have only one thing to say to you. What, Ro. Here, Ms. Marshall. Will this be all right? Oh, thank you. It's perfect. It isn't lavish. I'm afraid I have very simple taste, Miss Horton. In everything in food, in clothes, in acting. Really? Now, look, sugar, you aren't going to overdo it, are you? Overdo what? This small town character batting your eyes at the station, turning David's room into a taxidermist dream, deciding that he isn't here for anything except his desire to express a great love for children. The dedication ceremony is tomorrow afternoon, Ms. Marshall. Yes. Luncheons at 1. And meanwhile, Roxy, I'll have me a bit of a whirl through Beaver. Mercy. What a way to die. Hello. Oh, say, this is a beautiful drugstore you have chocolate soda? Please. They're my favorites. They're David Stanley's favorites, too. David Stanley? The movie actor? He's at the mayor's house, you know. My, what an enterprising little bank this is. Such nice, clean money. Will you cash this check for me? It's drawn against David Stanley's account in Hollywood. David Stanley? Oh, yes, he's here in Beaver. May I use your telephone? I want to call David Stanley. No, no, not long distance. He's at the mayor's house. Well, he certainly is. Call up yourself if you don't believe me. But the whole town's upside down. How could they have found out he was here at our house? I can't imagine. Oh, Daddy's going crazy. They've swarmed into his office from every side. Oh, not again. I won't answer it. I just won't answer it. It's been ringing.

[David Stanley]

And Doug, here we have the Limu Emu in its natural habitat, helping people customize their car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual. Fascinating. It's accompanied by his natural ally, Doug.

[Kit Marshall]

Limu.

[David Stanley]

Is that guy with the binoculars watching us? Cut the camera. They see us. Only pay for what you [e-mail] Liberty, Liberty, Liberty. Liberty Savings. Very unwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance company and affiliates.

[Kit Marshall]

Excludes Massachusetts from the Cascades to PDX to your kitchen. We recycle like we live here. That's why governments, brands and recycling companies.

[David Stanley]

Are all joining together to bring change.

[Kit Marshall]

To make recycling better. As in trusting that your recyclables end up in the right places to be made into new things and having brands help fund the cost of recycling. You can find the Latest updates at recycleon.org Oregon From Mount Hood to the bin under your desk. Together we can do this every 10 seconds for the past three hours. Fun, isn't it? Fun? I'm losing my mind.

[David Stanley]

Hey, there are people standing under my window leering at me. Why don't you answer that telephone?

[Kit Marshall]

Oh, hello. Yes, Mrs. Ferguson. I'll ask him. Mr. Stanley, do you want to speak to the garden club?

[David Stanley]

No, I have rose fever.

[Kit Marshall]

No, Mrs. Ferguson, he has rose fever. Oh, what's that? People. Scads and scads of people, all panting for David Stanley. Well, don't sit there smirking at me. They've got the house surrounded. We're cut off. Reinforcements couldn't possibly get through. Now you know how Custer felt at Bunker Hill, Valley Forge, the Alamo.

[David Stanley]

Okay, okay.

[Kit Marshall]

Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, yes, Ms. Horton, this is what you get for having anything to do with a celebrity. They'll be climbing in the windows any minute now. Come on, come on. We can sneak out the back way. With David's public clamoring for him. Don't be silly. He can have his public and his public can have him. Only first, go with me to the church. The ceremony's tomorrow. You'll have to see to it everything's in order. There won't be any time if they get hold of it.

[David Stanley]

That's an idea, Kit. Maybe you better.

[Kit Marshall]

You come too, Mr. Stanley. Oh, that phone. This is the office, Ms. Marshall. Hey, didn't I hear children? Yes, there's several of them in the home. We couldn't wait for Mr. Stanley's kiss before we open the doors. You really must try not to be bitter, dear.

[David Stanley]

Kit. Oh, Kit.

[Kit Marshall]

Uh. Oh, when he wails, he's in trouble.

[David Stanley]

Kit, look.

[Kit Marshall]

What have you got there? Hello.

[David Stanley]

I haven't got her. She's got me. All of a sudden, there she was. I don't know where she came from.

[Kit Marshall]

Hello, Millie. Two nine, zero, please. What are you doing? Calling my father. Millie, shouldn't you be in bed? No, ma'.

[David Stanley]

Am.

[Kit Marshall]

Well, those are pajamas you're wearing, aren't they?

[David Stanley]

Millie? Could I have my finger, please? Kit? She's got a stranglehold on my finger.

[Kit Marshall]

She won't bite you. He's pretty, isn't he? Mmm. Just like peppermint candy.

[David Stanley]

Oh, for heaven's sake.

[Kit Marshall]

If you sit down, I'll sit in your lap.

[David Stanley]

No, you don't.

[Kit Marshall]

Go on, David. It won't hurt you. Is your name David?

[David Stanley]

I guess so.

[Kit Marshall]

Would you try again? Let Millie sit on your lap. How old are you?

[David Stanley]

10,600.

[Kit Marshall]

I mean, Millie. I'm five and a half. That's it. Jump right up there. Well, David, she becomes you.

[David Stanley]

I'm not in the least maternal, but did you ring?

[Kit Marshall]

Hello. Hello, Father. You smell nice, David.

[David Stanley]

I do.

[Kit Marshall]

Daddy. We're at the home now. We came in the back door, so Nobody saw us. You get right down here as fast as you can. Mr. Stanley can do his dedicating tonight. What? Hurry, Daddy. Now you listen to me, you. Ms. Marshall. If you think I'll let you use these children for publicity purposes, you're mistaken. You're. What was that, Daddy? Give me that phone. What?

[David Stanley]

Millie, where'd you get so many freckles?

[Kit Marshall]

I haven't got any freckles.

[David Stanley]

Sure you have.

[Kit Marshall]

What? What's the matter? Measles. Measles.

[David Stanley]

Measles.

[Kit Marshall]

Here in the home quarantine this afternoon. Measles. David, drop that child.

[David Stanley]

And the Britain comes down on the second act of my play in the little theater of Times Square.

[Kit Marshall]

Smoking downstair are in the outer lobby smoking downstairs.

[David Stanley]

And here, ladies and gentlemen, once more, Vincent Pelletier. Remember, friends, beginning tomorrow, the NBC Radio Network will once again begin its complete comprehensive coverage of an important news event as the Democratic National Convention convenes in Chicago. For the best coverage of the Democratic National Convention, you'll want to set your radio dial to this NBC station. Here you will find NBC's corps of 300 experts ready to bring you every news event as it happens. At the microphones will be Ben Grauer, Morgan Beatty, Bob Considine, George Hicks, Ray Henley, W.W. chaplin and H.B. kaltenborn. To mention only a few of NBC's top news reporters. Tomorrow then, be sure to tune here for the opening session. And then keep tuned to this station for further convention coverage. Attend the Democratic Convention on NBC.

[Kit Marshall]

Last curtain.

[David Stanley]

First nighters are all in their seats ready for the last act. And there goes the curtain. Jeepers. And these freckles on Millie's face aren't freckles, they're measles.

[Kit Marshall]

David, we've got to get out of here. You can. I'd like to see anybody stop us. Oh, we're quarantined for two weeks. Daddy says there's a sign on the door. Yeah, so you have to bring us in by the back door. I'll bet David's last dollar you knew about the measles. I did not. If you think I deliberately arrange it so I'd have to spend the next two weeks with a couple of publicity hungry Hollywood.

[David Stanley]

Listen, Ms. Horton, we don't grab at publicity skirts because we're crazy about the old girl.

[Kit Marshall]

We're simple people, but as simple as tnt. Can I have some, David?

[David Stanley]

Not until you're older, dear.

[Kit Marshall]

Listen, we've got to get out of this place. Look, I'm the mayor's daughter. You said that it wouldn't do for the mayor's daughter and the mayor's guest to run around town spreading meat. Go ahead, enjoy yourself. Would anybody mind if I had a screaming fit?

[David Stanley]

No, not at all. You feel better?

[Kit Marshall]

No. What's she yelling about, David?

[David Stanley]

I don't know, Millie. She doesn't either.

[Kit Marshall]

Now, look, Ms. Horton. Roxanne, maybe you'd like a screen test. Flattery will get you nowhere. But nobody knows we're here. We could get up. Help. Hello. Yes, Mr. Beacons. Who's Mr. Beacons? Editor of the paper. Oh, lovely. Yes, Mr. Beacons. Oh, he did, did he? Your father told him about this? Yes, Mr. Beacons. The minute Mr. Stanley knew the children had measles, he rushed right in like Lochinvar. His horses parked at the curb. Oh, naturally, Mr. Beacons. He'll work his fingers to the bone to nurse them back to health. You may phone that message to the Associated Press. Goodbye, Mr. Beacons. Top that one. Roxy.

[David Stanley]

How many children are there?

[Kit Marshall]

Nine besides Millie, kid. And no nurses. And no doctors. Just Mrs. Walker, who's in charge. You can work a finger to the bone for each of the 10 children. Top that one, Ms. Marshall. This is all you want. Hey, wait a minute.

[David Stanley]

Wait a minute. Now, honey, what's this? Millie, don't cry.

[Kit Marshall]

What's everybody mad for now?

[David Stanley]

There, you see? You've scared. Millie, don't cry, honey.

[Kit Marshall]

Oh, Millie, don't be upset. I assure you we are not displeased with you. We are not displeased with you. My heavens, you don't talk to a child like that. Come on, Millie, darling. Let Roxanne tuck our little angel into bed. No, I want David. David.

[David Stanley]

Sure, honey, I've got you. Come on. Now, where's your room? Freckles? Er, measles.

[Kit Marshall]

As a child psychologist, you're a good mayor's daughter.

[David Stanley]

Kid. Kid. Are you in the basement?

[Kit Marshall]

Yes, David. Over by the laundry tub.

[David Stanley]

What are you doing?

[Kit Marshall]

What? What are you doing, kid? Oh.

[David Stanley]

Boiling the sheets.

[Kit Marshall]

Huh? What?

[David Stanley]

It says you're boiling the sheep. Huh?

[Kit Marshall]

The people who discovered malaria have nothing on me. What? Never mind. I don't know what I'm saying. David, you don't have to scrub the.

[David Stanley]

Floor on your knees. I got dishpan hands. Why not dish pan knees? Did you finish the ironing?

[Kit Marshall]

Oh, my back's killing me. Hi.

[David Stanley]

Hello, kid.

[Kit Marshall]

Hi. Well, Roxanne, when they let you out of the salt mines, do I look that bad?

[David Stanley]

Listen, none of us can complain about looks. What a week.

[Kit Marshall]

Bobby finally broke out. He must have been exposed before we isolated him. Don't you hate me when I get so technical, Ms. Walker, to have the kids supper trays ready by now.

[David Stanley]

I'll take Millie's to her.

[Kit Marshall]

I wonder why he feels he has to do that every night, Kid. He doesn't want to lose a good thing. Chances are that Millie shares her supper with him.

[David Stanley]

She does? I got all the cake frosting. So there.

[Kit Marshall]

Yes, Mr. Horton. I'm glad you phoned. Everything's under control. Children are coming along beautifully. We haven't dropped a stitch. Yes. Only two more days and it'll be over. We'll never forget Beaver, believe me. Well, the dedication ceremony day after tomorrow. Well, I don't know, Mr. Horton. I've got to talk to David about it. He and Roxanne are tucking the kids in for the night. Let me ring you back in half an hour, will you, David? Sarah had to have a drink of water.

[David Stanley]

She always does.

[Kit Marshall]

Is Millie asleep?

[David Stanley]

I think so. Cute, isn't she? Ah, now go to sleep, honey. The princess is waiting for you.

[Kit Marshall]

Princess?

[David Stanley]

It's a story we have.

[Kit Marshall]

You've been telling Millie bedtime stories?

[David Stanley]

Sure. I'm pretty handy at it too.

[Kit Marshall]

She'll miss you, David. We all will. I. I think I should apologize. I was very wrong about you. I thought you were coming to Beaver just because it would make good copy for the papers and Roxanne. No, now let me say it. It seems so cheap to me, using children that way. I was sure they didn't mean anything to you. Well, I was wrong. These past two weeks you've been wonderful. The kids love you. You can't fool them. You couldn't fool little Millie, and you couldn't fool me. David, you're. You're a very real person. Would you care if I kissed you? Salud, senor.

[David Stanley]

Salute. Roxanne.

[Kit Marshall]

Oh, kid. Oh, I, I, I was. I didn't mean to. I just happened to be passing. Well, I. I was apologizing to David. A very thorough apology. Do you mind? No. I've got to explain something. Roxanne, I know you. You like David and he likes you. So don't blame him for any of this. It was for publicity. But it was my idea. David objected like a mule the whole time. It was cheap. And there you have my epitaph. However, there'll be no ceremony, no blowing of horns, no crowds, no speeches. Oh, but kid, if it would help, you deserve. No, no ceremony. These kids, well, you can't feed them and bathe them, take their temperatures and play games and try to wish Every measles spot off of them without. Oh, call me soft headed. Go on. Call me soft headed but soft hearted. Do me. Don't be silly. Not old 10% Marshall. I never had a heartbeat in my life.

[David Stanley]

It was good of Roxanne to come to the station with us.

[Kit Marshall]

Yeah. Well, David, on to Hollywood, huh?

[David Stanley]

Yep.

[Kit Marshall]

Wouldn't the boys at the studio laugh if they found out what we've been doing?

[David Stanley]

Yeah.

[Kit Marshall]

Ha, ha. Like that. Beaver wasn't a bad town, was it? No, Kit, it wasn't.

[David Stanley]

Kit, I've got to go back.

[Kit Marshall]

Back?

[David Stanley]

Back to Beaver. I've got to.

[Kit Marshall]

Yeah, I rather expected you would. You're in love with her, aren't you?

[David Stanley]

Am I? They were the happiest two weeks I've ever known. She was swell all through it.

[Kit Marshall]

Wasn't she swell?

[David Stanley]

She kissed me good night every night.

[Kit Marshall]

Oh, yeah.

[David Stanley]

Can you imagine that?

[Kit Marshall]

Yes, I can imagine that.

[David Stanley]

What's the matter with you?

[Kit Marshall]

Not a thing. I'm very, very glad for you, Kits.

[David Stanley]

You and I will have a great time. I can adopt her.

[Kit Marshall]

Adopt her? Are you insane?

[David Stanley]

Insane?

[Kit Marshall]

You'll have to marry her.

[David Stanley]

Marry her?

[Kit Marshall]

You couldn't adopt her, David. For heaven's sake, why couldn't I? Why, she's 23. If she's a day 20, she's five and a half. What?

[David Stanley]

What?

[Kit Marshall]

What are you talking about?

[David Stanley]

Millie.

[Kit Marshall]

Millie?

[David Stanley]

Well, certainly.

[Kit Marshall]

Oh, David.

[David Stanley]

Kid, did you think I meant. You did. You thought I meant Roxanne and you didn't like it.

[Kit Marshall]

Did you like it, kid?

[David Stanley]

I've waited three years to see that look on your face.

[Kit Marshall]

David. Oh, David, give me room. Darling. I'm breaking up into little pieces.

[David Stanley]

Maybe I better hold you together.

[Kit Marshall]

Please, David. David, you do smell nice.

[David Stanley]

Turn around here.

[Kit Marshall]

Oh, brother. You said it.

[David Stanley]

There it is, ladies and gentlemen, the premier performance of what looks like a new hit play on the great white House at the little theater off Times Square. Ms. Ly and Mr. Soleil taking bows they call Betty New Jersey for the wing. Now they're joined by Mary McGovern. And the audience is giving them a great ovation. Next week. We hope you join us again and bring your friends to hear a gay and whimsical comedy called the Three Dwarfs. You find it amusing and delightful. I'll count on seeing you next week at this same time now we move out of the theater and into the street. Paper here.

[Kit Marshall]

XV get you late paper.

[David Stanley]

Here's your cab, Mr. First Nighter. Thank you. Good night. The First Night of program starring Olin Soule and Barbara Luddy. Is a copyrighted radio feature produced and directed by Joseph T. Ainley. Tonight's play was pure fiction and did not refer to real people or actual events. This is NBC.

[Kit Marshall]

Plastic bags, Plastic lids. What do we do with you? You can't go in the recycling bin, but you can be recycled if taken to a new recycle on center. Find one near [e-mail] OregonCenters Gaines Super.

[David Stanley]

Flings are here to take your laundry.

[Kit Marshall]

To the next level.

[David Stanley]

Talking about Gain Super Flings Super Sized Laundry packs. These things are huge. Super Fresh Super Clean Gain Super Flings Gain Super Flings Laundry packs have four.

[Kit Marshall]

Times the Oxy Cleaning Power and three times the Febreze.

[David Stanley]

Freshness versus Gain Original Liquid Super Fresh Super Clean Gain Super Flings Gain Super.

[Kit Marshall]

Flings for next level laundry.