33_half_moon_street_1965-06-03_the_king_and_the_cauliflower_ear

Summary

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Harold's Old Time Radio

Episode: "33 Half Moon Street (1965-06-03): The King and the Cauliflower Ear"

Air Date: February 15, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode revives an atmospheric detective drama from the 1960s classic radio era. The story follows Cannon and Mr. Mason of Assignments Unlimited as a routine supervision job at a boxing match takes a macabre turn. A grisly mystery surrounding a severed ear, mistaken identities, and twin brothers in the world of professional boxing builds to a melancholy twist on ambition, mental health, and loyalty. The narrative blends dry wit, vivid sports commentary, and noir intrigue, paying tribute to the sharp dialogue and memorable characters of Golden Age radio.

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Key Discussion Points & Story Beats

Setting the Scene: Boxing at Earl’s Court

• Cannon and Mr. Moore discuss the aftermath of a boxing match and upcoming staffing issues at Earl’s Court for the Empire title fight. Due to a local ruling, the area must be cleaned immediately post-event, requiring extra supervisors. (01:06–01:41)
  • Cannon jokes about being the answer to staff woes and plugs his employer: “Ring up Grosvenor 5995. That’s the phone number of Assignments Unlimited at 33 Half Moon Street.” — Cannon (01:45)
• Mr. Mason, head of Assignments Unlimited, arranges for Cannon and another man to supervise the cleanup, mixing the world of labor with a love of chess and the British sporting scene. (02:53–03:49)

Fight Night: The Empire Cruiserweight Title

• We’re brought ringside with NBC commentator Leslie Benn, who provides a vividly dramatic play-by-play of the title fight between champion Ned Riley and challenger Sammy Bart. (04:50–07:29)
  • “Both fighters are in good shape for the contest, and there’s not a pound difference in weight between them.” — Leslie Benn (04:56)
  • “Riley’s down again… his face looks like he’d dive head first into a cement mixer.” — Leslie Benn (06:47)
• Sammy Bart wins decisively, in a swift and shocking victory.

Chess, Celebrations, and an Ominous Discovery

• After the fight, Mr. Mason finishes a club chess championship when Cannon calls, excited about the win and their completed job—but with an ominous twist:
  • “One of the Jamaican cleaners found a small parcel wrapped in brown paper under the ring in Sammy Bart’s corner. It’s addressed to Bart… it’s blood.” — Cannon (09:23–09:33)
• Upon opening the package, they discover a human ear. Mr. Mason is unsettled; Cannon makes macabre jokes but is clearly disturbed. They deliberate whether to go to the police, fearing the loss of their cleaning contract, but ultimately decide to deliver the ear to Bart himself. (11:34–12:46)

A Chilling Encounter with the Champion

• Cannon delivers the parcel to "Sammy Bart" in his hotel suite. The meeting is tense, with Bart's cultured demeanor at odds with his profession:
  • “Having delivered your strange parcel, what do you expect me to do with it?” — Nigel Bart as Bart (18:08)
  • “Take it to the cops, I guess.” — Cannon (18:17)
• Bart suggests simply forgetting the incident, pays Cannon off, and sends him on his way. Cannon feels unease, sensing an attempt to buy his silence. (19:02–20:01)

The Truth About the Bart Brothers

• Cannon, Mason, and Leslie Benn (the commentator) piece together the mysterious history of the Bart twins: Nigel (the better boxer, marred by a larceny conviction) and Sammy (the troubled brother). Intrigue deepens when Benn reveals Sammy’s troubled history and that only one twin has the signature cauliflower ear.
• Abruptly, the story turns dark: “Sammy Bart committed suicide this morning. Jumped from the roof of a block of flats.” — Leslie Benn (22:29)

The Final Revelation (The Twist)

• A call to Assignments Unlimited leads to a confidential meeting. The visitor is revealed to be Nigel Bart, who confesses:
  • He fought in place of his brother the previous night, using a rubber cauliflower ear to impersonate Sammy and protect his brother’s legacy.
  • The severed ear was Sammy’s—cut off and sent as a desperate act before his suicide. Nigel’s confession brings the tragic story full circle:

  “My brother Sammy went downhill… It was I who fought and beat Ned Riley last night, not Sammy. We were identical twins. No one could tell us apart, except for the cauliflower ear and Sammy’s mental instability. The ear you saw on me last night was fabricated from rubber…” — Nigel Bart (23:58–25:27)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On discovering the ear:
  “Maybe it was voodoo after all.” — Cannon (11:36)
  “Cannon, that’s an ear. A human ear.” — Mr. Mason (11:38)

• On twins and mistaken identity:
  “So that makes his skeleton in Sammy Bart’s cupboard—a one-eared skeleton that’s rattling a money box under his nose.” — Cannon (20:21)

• Revelation & tragic end:
  “Sammy tried hard to go straight… The fact he was missing his last big chance to make good threw him right off balance. Cutting off his ear and sending it to me was his last act of defiance before committing suicide.” — Nigel Bart (25:27)

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Important Timestamps

• Staffing woes and the setup: 01:06–03:49
• Fight commentary, Bart’s victory: 04:50–07:29
• Discovery of the ear: 09:23–12:46
• Confrontation with “Sammy Bart”: 15:46–19:02
• Cannon’s suspicions & gathering clues: 20:00–21:22
• Leslie Benn reveals the suicide: 22:29
• Nigel Bart’s full confession: 23:50–26:02

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Conclusion & Tone

The episode delivers the suspense and dry humor characteristic of its era, with Cannon’s hardboiled asides and Mr. Mason’s no-nonsense professionalism contrasting with the tragic fate of the Bart twins. The twist ending—where victory in the ring masks heartbreak and identity confusion—serves as a poignant reminder of the human stories behind sporting glory.

Listeners are left with a classic radio mystery: sharp dialogue, unexpected reversals, and ultimately, an unsolved sadness behind the “king” and the “cauliflower ear.”

Transcript

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[Cannon]

Well, you got to admit the boy's game.

[Mr. Moore]

He won't lost the randad. This Jamaican voice is on his nails. Punch like a kick of a mule. There, won't I tell you the referee stopped the fight. Well, it was there.

[Cannon]

Crazy crowd. The English always shout for the underdogs. But I bet it'll be different next week for the Empire title.

[Mr. Moore]

Bast if there is an Empire title.

[Cannon]

What do you mean by that?

[Mr. Moore]

Staff troubles. There's an LCC ruling at Earl's Courtland. The whole area must be cleaned up right after the meeting. I don't know how we manage tonight. Later load next week.

[Cannon]

You short of staff, Mr. Moore?

[Mr. Moore]

Who's desperate then?

[Cannon]

I'm the answer to a maiden's prayer. Ring up Grosvenor 5995. That's the phone number of Assignments Unlimited at 33 Half Mood Street.

[Mr. Mason]

Aubrey Mason at your service. At Assignments Unlimited, we do anything anywhere at any time. 33 Half Moon Street. Cannon is really a quiet sort of chap with a plebeian taste for football, boxing and Wild west pictures. He's rugged, of course, which is just as well, because Cannon has an unfortunate habit of attracting trouble. It's never intentional. He explains it by saying he has a mesmeric metabolism that attracts the seamy side of life. Certainly Mr. Moore gave no indication of what was to come when I interviewed him on the Earl's Court Shop Tina's after the big fight next week, Mr. Moore. Well, I'm not sure that we could supply the number of workers you need for that.

[Mr. Moore]

Oh, it's not the actual sweepers, Mr. Mason. We can get them from the labor exchange. You see, they're mostly West Indians and work well enough if properly supervised. Mr. Cannon told me that you might be able to supply two or three men to act in a supervisory capacity with the work.

[Mr. Mason]

Oh, yes, that we can do easily. I'll put two of my most reliable men on the job.

[Mr. Moore]

Will one of them be Mr. Cannon?

[Mr. Mason]

Without doubt. He'll be delighted at the opportunity of watching the big fight free of charge.

[Mr. Moore]

May I send you a couple of complimentary tickets, Mr. Mason?

[Mr. Mason]

It's a Friday night. Oh, it's kind of you, Mr. Moore, but, well, I must decline. Unfortunately, not interested in professional boxing. Oh, it's not that, actually. It just so happens that this Friday night my club's having its own championship match. I'm an active participant. You're a boxer? No, Mr. Moore, not nearly so romantic. It is a chess championship. Check. I think you'll find the men I send to be reliable, Mr. Moore. And I wish you a successful Friday evening.

[Mr. Moore]

As your Mr. Cannon would say, this Empire title fight will be a knockout.

[Cannon]

Hi. Any objections if I park in the booth here for the fight?

[Leslie Benn]

Well, that depends. Are you an American?

[Narrator/Additional Voice]

New York. You?

[Leslie Benn]

Milwaukee. Well, regulations state only members of the staff are allowed in here.

[Cannon]

Well. And I guess it's okay. Cannon's the main boss of the cleaning team.

[Leslie Benn]

Come right on in, Cannon. I'm Leslie Ben. National Broadcasting Corporation.

[Cannon]

Well, what do you know? You. You making the fight commentary?

[Mr. Mason]

That's right.

[Leslie Benn]

The New York Border Control recognizes this Empire fight as a world eliminator. Hence the broadcast to the States. If you sit quietly in the corner, nobody's gonna say a word. But I said quietly and no bad words.

[Cannon]

Well, my old mammy sent me to Sunday school every week. Stand by, Mr. Ben. You're hooked up in 10 seconds from now.

[Leslie Benn]

Here we go. Give me full sound and number four booth. Good afternoon to all listeners on the NBC Hookup. This is Leslie Benn reporting from the Earl's Court Stadium in London, England, where the time is 9:30pm and the contenders for the British Empire cruiserweight title are limbering up in their respective corners awaiting the gong for the first round. It'll set them in combat and decide who will a tilt of the world cruiserweight crown in Toledo in December. Both fighters are in good shape for the contest, and there's not a pound difference in weight between them. The champion, Ned Riley, with his scarlet shirts emblazoned with the green shamrock of Ireland and the challenger, Sammy Bart. The decks in a more sombre black. The colors are symbolic. It'll be a red letter day for the winner and a black Friday for the loser. I expect a good fight since both boys have everything to gain by a win here in London, England. Some of you keen followers of the fight game will remember three years back when Nigel Bart, twin brother of Sammy who's in the ring now, fought in the. A larceny charge ended Nigel's career. But his twin brother has stepped right into his shoes to challenge the champion tonight. And there goes the bell for the first round. They meet in the center of the ring, both fighters summing each other up. Riley has a three day crop of whiskers on his chin and snarl on his face. Farts cool, imperturbable and large rosy tinear the hallmark of his profession. On an otherwise unmarked face. Riley Lee's with a left, got brushes.

[Mr. Mason]

To the side, sidesteps neatly as he.

[Leslie Benn]

Turns that great cauliflower ear stands up like the plumed helm of Navarre. And suddenly the temple's changed. Bart comes thumbing in like a flashing light.

[Narrator/Additional Voice]

A left, a left, another left and a mighty chopping right that's got Riley reeling and the crowd's going berserk.

[Leslie Benn]

Oh, this is a Sammy bod we've never seen before. He comes in again and slams home.

[Narrator/Additional Voice]

That left and a right and another left and a right that chops down Riley like a meat axe. He's down, Riley's down. Left Riley. 3, 4. Well he's up at 4, but boy his face looks like he' dive head.

[Leslie Benn]

First into a cement mixer. And Riley's down again.

[Narrator/Additional Voice]

And he's down again. All the crowds going wild. He has a fear, something he could capture. Trump puzzles out of it. 2, 4, 5. The champions game. He wants to get up with the refs insisting on the compulsory count of eight. Out for a second knockdown. And he's up, swaying on his feet as the challenger comes storming in. And it's a left and a left. And over comes that right to chop down the champ. He's down, Riley's down and he'll put his. Not with time. 60 seconds by my count. And a new champion of the British Empire, Taylor temple of champion was here to watch this fight tonight. And it's not going to be a buggy ride when he meets Sammy Bart in December. Sammy Bart, the new cruiserweight champion.

[Mr. Mason]

Check your rook, Sir Thomas. I think you've got me, Mason. Check and mate. Thank you Sir Thomas. I don't know how you do it, Mason. You're a fighter, all right. Oh, it's the bulldog spirit, sir.

[Cannon]

Excuse me, sir.

[Mr. Mason]

Is the game concluded? Yes, Crawley. Another chess championship out of the way until next year. May I inquire who won, Sir Thomas? You may indeed, Crawley. Mr. Mason. Undefeatable. The most rugged fighter in the kingdom. Then you will be able to answer the telephone, Mr. Mason. Telephone. What is it? Who is it? American intonation in the voice, Mr. Mason. Oh, I know who it is, Crawley. Shall I plug in the extension, mister? If you will. Well, I think this calls for a celebration. A bottle of port. Any dissenters? Ah, capital. Well, let's leave Mason to his telephone conversation and appoint Crawley Potman. Thank you. Hello? Oh, is that you, Cannon?

[Cannon]

Hello to you all. This is hot news straight from the Cannon's mouth.

[Mr. Mason]

Cannon, are you drunk?

[Cannon]

No, I'm quite sober, chief. I have watched a big fight from a broadcasting booth and seen the great Leslie Byrne in action.

[Mr. Mason]

Oh, good show. Did he win? I mean, this Leslie Benn. No, no, no.

[Cannon]

Leslie Benn was the commentator. The protagonists were Ned Reilly and Sammy Bart. Bart won, and our job's completed.

[Mr. Mason]

Already? But I thought you wouldn't be through until 1 in the morning.

[Cannon]

Well, the fight lasted 1 minute, 60 seconds. What a challenge. And what a champion.

[Mr. Mason]

Cannon. Look, if ever we get a job calling for a boxing commentator, our seats passed on to you. But right now, we have a little celebration going on in the club, so if you don't, sir.

[Cannon]

Say, that's right. I forgot. You were playing in the chess championship tonight. How did it go, chief?

[Mr. Mason]

Extremely well, thank you.

[Cannon]

What I mean is, who won?

[Mr. Mason]

Well, I did, actually. Now, I must say.

[Cannon]

No, no, hang on, chief. Look, I gotta see you tonight.

[Mr. Mason]

Trouble?

[Cannon]

Maybe.

[Mr. Mason]

Well, what is it?

[Cannon]

Well, one of the Jamaican cleaners found a small parcel wrapped in brown paper under the ring in Sammy Bart's corner. It's addressed to Bart.

[Mr. Mason]

Well, then why don't you give it to him?

[Cannon]

There's a stain in one corner where something has seeped through. Yes, you guessed it, chief. It's blood.

[Mr. Mason]

All right, Cannon, dump it on the table. You say you found it under the ring by this Sammy Bart's corner.

[Cannon]

Well, strictly speaking, chief, one of the Jamaican cleaners found it.

[Mr. Mason]

And he handed it to you. That's right. Are they reliable, these Jamaicans?

[Cannon]

Well, if you mean honest. Yes, as anybody's honest who works as janitor. They're superstitious too. This guy Bart wasn't expected to win, and yet he sailed through the champion like a maniac with a pearl axe. So I told the Jamaican it was probably voodoo.

[Mr. Mason]

What on earth did you do?

[Cannon]

That, though Mr. Moore promised me a personal bonus if I got the place clean before midnight. When they heard about the voodoo, they had that joint as clean as a widow's parlor in half an hour flat.

[Mr. Mason]

Cannon, you're incorrigible.

[Cannon]

And not only that, I got bad habits. Well, what do we do, chief? Open or deliver?

[Mr. Mason]

Well, it might simply be meat.

[Cannon]

A pound of steak in case he got a black eye.

[Mr. Mason]

I wonder what it. What he was doing under the ring like that.

[Cannon]

Well, if I could offer my professional advice as a garbage expert. That entire arena was knee deep in empty popcorn packets, torn up tickets, newspapers for the fish and chips, and the whole place, only one small square was free of garbage under the ring. So when the scaffold company took the ring away, it was impossible to miss seeing the package.

[Mr. Mason]

That rather looks as though it was put there purposely.

[Cannon]

Well, you've got to be very short sighted to mistake a boxing ring for a mailbox.

[Mr. Mason]

Well, it's carefully wrapped and neatly typed. You know, it's our duty to hand this straight over to Mr. Moore.

[Cannon]

Well, supposing I opened it very carefully, you know, so's I could wrap it up again. Very carefully.

[Mr. Mason]

Well, that might be dangerous.

[Cannon]

No, it can't be a time bomb. Gunpowder's black.

[Mr. Mason]

Oh, all right. But if he turns out to be a pound of liver, I'll have your blood.

[Cannon]

Okay, here we go.

[Mr. Mason]

Wow.

[Cannon]

Maybe it was voodoo after all.

[Mr. Mason]

Cannon, that's an ear. A human ear. Cannon just sat and stared at it, his hand gently stroking his own generous lobe. And then it occurred to me that this was a very large ear, Severed sharply but crudely from its owner's head. What could it mean? I glanced inquiringly at Cannon.

[Cannon]

Well, that's new. Maybe a day old.

[Mr. Mason]

Yes, I was thinking the same thing.

[Cannon]

Well, who can he belong to? Search me. Maybe we got a modern van Gogh running loose in London.

[Mr. Mason]

Van Gogh? Gough was an artist. Anyway, he cut off his ear to send to his lady love.

[Cannon]

Well, it could be in reverse. A lot of these dames go dizzy over prize fighters.

[Leslie Benn]

A girl's ear.

[Mr. Mason]

Look at the size of it.

[Cannon]

Well, somebody's ears were burning last night for sure.

[Mr. Mason]

Another facetious remark like that from you, and I'll put a flea on your ear. Okay, now, look, my mind's made up. In the morning, I'm going to ring Mr. Moore and tell him exactly what's happened. Then it's up to him to take any action he thinks necessary.

[Podcast Host]

Okay.

[Cannon]

That's the end of the cleaning contract. What do you mean? Well, Mr. Moore is so pleased with the job we did tonight, he's coming around here in the morning to offer us a regular contract at his Big Five promotionals. So one of the rules is that all lost property is deposited with the man in the box office. That's why he wants supervisors. Once he knows that, we remove this parcel from the arena and open it. You get what I mean, chief?

[Mr. Mason]

I don't like it, Cannon. The police should be informed.

[Cannon]

Well, there's. There's no law against cutting off your ear. I mean, legally, it's like cutting toenails. So some nut cuts off his ear and sent it to the challenger, Sammy Bart. It's a man's ear, and a big one at that. How do we know why he did it?

[Mr. Mason]

Oh, all right. But what do we do with it? I say we're morally obliged to take it round to the police station, even if we do lose the cleaner's contract.

[Cannon]

No sense in cutting off your nose to sprite your face, Cannon. Sorry, chief. No, no, let me wrap it up again and take it down to Sammy Bart first thing.

[Mr. Mason]

Oh, all right, you win. But I don't like it. I don't like it at all. Cannon, what on earth will Mr. Bart say when he opens it?

[Cannon]

Sammy Bart is the empire champion and he comes from London. So you're probably sad.

[Narrator/Additional Voice]

Yes.

[Cannon]

What's this here?

[Mr. Mason]

The heavy leather bound volume of Hermer's Iliad that I hurled at Cannon crashed into a closed door. In a way, I was glad that he brought the grizzly parcel back to the office. I know very little about prize fighters, but I reasoned that Mr. Bart, having won his contest, would be feeling a little like myself. I must confess to a certain exhilaration of being the club chess champion. And the fighter must have felt the same. That parcel, if delivered on the night of his victory, would most certainly have ruined his great moment. But in one thing, Cannon was wrong.

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[Mr. Mason]

Sammy Bart might be a prize fighter from London, but his speech was impeccable.

[Nigel Bart]

Come in, Mr. Cannon. I must apologize for the untidiness of my hotel suite. I slept late this morning.

[Cannon]

Understandably, champ. I watched the fight last night. You were great.

[Nigel Bart]

Thank you.

[Cannon]

I'm a fan, you know. Never miss the big ones. Sat right up there with Leslie Ben, the commentator. The American?

[Mr. Mason]

Yeah.

[Cannon]

They broadcast the fight to the States there, didn't you know? Oh, yes, of course. Well, he's tops in the States, you know.

[Mr. Mason]

You.

[Cannon]

You ever been to America?

[Nigel Bart]

No, no, I've never been to America. They said at the desk that you had a parcel to deliver to me personally.

[Cannon]

Oh, yeah, that's right. I've got it here.

[Nigel Bart]

Who gave it, you may ask?

[Cannon]

Nobody. You see, I was in charge of the cleaners at the stadium and one of the workers found this under the ring by your corner. It's addressed to you, so I thought I'd bring it round personally.

[Nigel Bart]

That was very kind of you. If you wait a minute, I'll see.

[Cannon]

That you're suitably rewarded. Oh, that's okay. It's just part of my job. Well, I've got to get back, so.

[Narrator/Additional Voice]

If you'll excuse me.

[Nigel Bart]

I wouldn't hear of it. Sit down, Mr. Cannon.

[Cannon]

Well, you see, I.

[Narrator/Additional Voice]

Sit down.

[Mr. Mason]

Okay.

[Narrator/Additional Voice]

Him.

[Mr. Mason]

Sammy.

[Cannon]

Nothing wrong, I hope, Mr. Bar. Webber.

[Nigel Bart]

Yes.

[Cannon]

God.

[Mr. Mason]

Lock the door. Yes.

[Leslie Benn]

Go.

[Cannon]

Look, I got a.

[Nigel Bart]

Sit down, Mr. Cannon. How did you get this parcel?

[Cannon]

Well, it's. It's like I told you the last time.

[Nigel Bart]

Where did you get this parcel?

[Cannon]

Hey, now, look, if you're trying to get to him.

[Nigel Bart]

Yes, Mr. Cannon.

[Cannon]

Yeah, I should get tangled up with the future world champion. Okay, I'll complain.

[Nigel Bart]

Better. A drink?

[Mr. Mason]

Yeah.

[Cannon]

Scotch on the rocks. Web up.

[Leslie Benn]

Yes, Scott.

[Nigel Bart]

All right, Mr. Cannon. You were about to come clean.

[Cannon]

Well, you see, I. I work for an organization called Assignments Unlimited. You can check the numbers in the directory Grosvenor. 5995. I found the parcel just like I said.

[Narrator/Additional Voice]

But.

[Cannon]

But I noticed there was blood that had seeped out.

[Mr. Mason]

It's got you on the rocks. Oh.

[Cannon]

Oh, thanks. So I took it back to the office and opened it up to have a look. Well, the boss and me, well, we decided the best thing to do was to deliver it here this morning.

[Nigel Bart]

What else could you have done with it?

[Cannon]

Well, the chief wanted me to deliver it to the police.

[Nigel Bart]

Have you any idea where this might have come from?

[Cannon]

Well, I figured it was some kind of nuts.

[Nigel Bart]

All right, Webber. Now, Mr. Cannon, having delivered your strange parcel, what do you expect me to do with it?

[Cannon]

Take it to the cops, I guess.

[Nigel Bart]

Yes, that would be the logical thing.

[Mr. Mason]

Or throw it away.

[Nigel Bart]

Forget the whole incident.

[Cannon]

Yeah, yeah, that's what I do. No sense in keeping it.

[Nigel Bart]

Forget all about it. That'd be hard for you, Mr. Cannon. I imagine your experience would make a good talking point.

[Cannon]

That I found an ear in a box and delivered it to the future world champion. You want to have me thrown out of every bar in town?

[Nigel Bart]

It is an unlikely story, isn't it?

[Cannon]

Crazy.

[Nigel Bart]

Very well, Mr. Cannon, you've proved to me that you're not some idiotic practical joker, so you may go, weber.

[Cannon]

Well, thanks, Mr. Bart. It's nice to have met you.

[Nigel Bart]

Oh, and here's a fiber for your trouble.

[Cannon]

Well, that's very generous.

[Nigel Bart]

I make a good friend, Mr. Cannon. Good morning.

[Mr. Mason]

Cannon arrived back at the office at 10:30 and outlined his experience with the champion. I was surprised that so able a pugilist should be a man of such culture and wondered if the glorious days of Gentlemen Jim Corbett were to be resuscitated. Cannon, idly twisting the morning newspaper in his hands, had no such lofty thoughts.

[Nigel Bart]

He.

[Cannon]

He didn't talk like a prize fighter. Apart from that cauliflower ear, he doesn't even look like a prize fighter.

[Mr. Mason]

Are you sure it was the Empire champion you saw this morning?

[Cannon]

Oh, no doubt about that, Chief. I watched that fight from the commentator's booth through the telescope window. And that's better than ringside. I'd know Sammy Bart anymore.

[Mr. Mason]

Well, then I vote we forget the whole incident.

[Cannon]

That's what Sammy Bart wants us to do. I gave him an ear, and he gave me a fiver.

[Mr. Mason]

Well, what's wrong with that?

[Cannon]

Well, I got the impression that he was trying to buy me off. I don't like that. If I'm right, Sammy Bart is pushing me around, and I don't let anybody push me around. Not Even the cruiserweight champion. And what's more, if he was sleeping me a fiber to keep my mouth shut, then he must know where that ear came from.

[Mr. Mason]

Check and mate.

[Cannon]

So that makes his skeleton in Sammy Bart's covered. A one eared skeleton that's rattling a money box under his nose. And the champ is headed for the big time. Take a look at the morning newspaper. Read the headlines.

[Mr. Mason]

Sammy Bart to be crowned king in December. King.

[Cannon]

Now that's what they call the world champion. The king.

[Mr. Mason]

How quaint. Well, he'll receive a lot of money for this.

[Cannon]

Well worth closed circuit television rights, about $3 million.

[Mr. Mason]

Well, I think I'll get a trainer in for you, Cannon. Yes? A Mr. Who? Ben.

[Cannon]

I asked him over, chief.

[Mr. Mason]

Oh, all right. Send him in, will you? Isn't that the commentator fellow you were telling me about?

[Cannon]

That's the boy. I heard him make a few remarks about the champ and the challenger last night. I just wanted to hear more.

[Mr. Mason]

Oh, do come in, Mr. Ben.

[Nigel Bart]

Thank you.

[Leslie Benn]

Hello there, Kenner.

[Mr. Mason]

Enjoy the fight last night?

[Cannon]

Great. Mr. Brand, this is Mr. Mason, my chief.

[Mr. Mason]

How do you do?

[Leslie Benn]

I'll never better. Well, I got your message.

[Mr. Mason]

What can I do for you?

[Cannon]

Well, we got a small problem, Mr. Brand. It's about Sammy Bart, the new champ, huh? Tell me, where did he get that, that great cauliflower ear?

[Leslie Benn]

Lucky you. I looked it up in the ring manual and thought I might slip it into the broadcast as a tip that if the fight got dull, not that I had much chance. He got it in a fight in Millwall. Not in the ring either. A bunch of hoodlums whipped him over with an iron bar. Why do you ask?

[Cannon]

You said he had a twin brother.

[Nigel Bart]

That's right.

[Leslie Benn]

Nigel Bart.

[Nigel Bart]

Great fighter, too.

[Leslie Benn]

Maybe even better than Sammy.

[Cannon]

What happened, sir?

[Mr. Mason]

Nigel Bart?

[Leslie Benn]

Oh, he was campaigning in the States. He got hauled in on a larceny charge and was convicted. If that happens to a fighter, he loses his license. So that was the end of Nigel Bart.

[Cannon]

Tell me, has. Has Sammy ever been to the States to fight?

[Leslie Benn]

No, no, But I heard tell he was in America around the time his brother Nigel was sent up the river.

[Cannon]

And this Nigel, has he got a cauliflower ear?

[Nigel Bart]

Mm, mm.

[Leslie Benn]

Not a mark on him.

[Mr. Mason]

That's unusual for a prize fighter.

[Leslie Benn]

Look, what's all this about?

[Cannon]

Look, I want to have a talk with Sammy Barton. I want you to come with me.

[Mr. Mason]

Are you kidding?

[Leslie Benn]

Haven't you seen the special edition? Sammy Bart committed suicide this morning. Jumped from the roof of a block of flats.

[Mr. Mason]

And so it seemed that we should never know the solution to the mystery of the ear. There it was in the newspaper. Sammy, Bart, suicide, complete and final. And then the telephone rang. Assignments unlimited.

[Nigel Bart]

Is that Mr. Mason?

[Narrator/Additional Voice]

Speaking.

[Nigel Bart]

Is there a Mr. Cannon with you?

[Mr. Mason]

Yes, he's one of my operators. He's with me at the Mountain, as a matter of fact. Would you like to speak to him?

[Nigel Bart]

Not now. I'd like to talk to you both in, say, half an hour. But I must stress that our conversation be in the privacy of your office and completely confidential.

[Mr. Mason]

Well, of course. May I ask who's calling?

[Nigel Bart]

Your Mr. Cannon will know me. We had a little chat earlier this morning. My name is Bart.

[Mr. Mason]

I didn't tell Cannon immediately. First, I thanked Leslie Benn, the commentator, and promised to take a more active interest in fisticuffs. Only when he'd gone did I tell Cannon about the phantom caller. Except that he wasn't a phantom. He arrived on schedule, a magnificent specimen of manhood, vibrant and very much alive. He addressed one remark to Cannon, who answered with a grunt. And then we let him have his head.

[Nigel Bart]

I apologize my rather high handed treatment of you this morning, Mr. Cannon. You'll notice that I no longer have a cauliflower ear.

[Cannon]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Nigel Bart]

I came to you because my brother's death this morning closes a tragic chapter in our family life. I had to speak to you because Sammy died during the time you were in my hotel suite. Once you read about his death, you'd feel obliged to go to the police. I'm Nigel Bart, of course. Sammy's twin brother. It was I who fought and beat Ned Riley last night, not Sammy. We were identical twins. No one could tell us apart, except for the cauliflower ear and Sammy's mental instability. The ear you saw on me last night was fabricated from rubber and glued over. My own was one reason why I had to finish the fight quickly. Blow from Ned might have dislodged it. My brother Sammy went downhill when our father died. Kept bad company, seldom out of trouble. I did all I could, but it was one battle I didn't win.

[Mr. Mason]

I'd gladly have lost all the others.

[Nigel Bart]

But it wasn't to be. I took him to the United States with me, hoping that a new environment might change him. But he was caught by the police, charged with larceny. And that was before his brush with the Millwall Gang that damaged his ear. In short, I rang the changes, stood trial for him. You probably know the result. Sammy tried hard to go straight.

[Cannon]

He turned professional.

[Nigel Bart]

He was all right for a time didn't bust. The rubber ear was made a while ago as a joke. Last night, when Sammy was in no condition to go into the ring, I planned with him to swap places again. The fact he was missing his last big chance to make good throw him right off balance. Cutting off his ear and sending it to me was his last act of defiance before committing suicide.

[Mr. Mason]

Well, there you are. The story we called the King and the Cauliflower Ear.

[Narrator/Additional Voice]

It.