
Lux Radio Theatre - The Bishops Wife
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Hey everybody.
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Lady luck here. And we're celebrating America's 250th birthday. Now all summer long I'm going to be celebrating by playing on spinquest.com which is an American owned social casino. It obviously features over a thousand slot games and live blackjack, live craps, live bubble craps. Head on over to spinquest.com. get yourself a $30 coin pack for just 10 bucks.
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Spinquest is a free to play social casino void where prohibited. Visit spinquest.com for more details. Hollywood. Lelever Brothers Company, the makers of Lux Toilet soap brings you the Lux Radio Theater starring Cary Grant and Phyllis Baxter in the Bishop's Life. Ladies and gentlemen, your producer, Mr. Irving Cummings. Greetings from Hollywood. Ladies and gentlemen. Tonight we present another of our 20 greats. It is one of the most delightful pictures Samuel Goldwyn ever produced. The Bishop's Wife. Cary Grant is recreating his original role from the picture. And Phyllis Thaxter has co starred on this stage with Cary in this enchanting comedy. So she is well acquainted with the role of the Bishop's Wife. It's a late afternoon in December in a rather shabby section of a large city. Two old friends have an unexpected meeting. Julia. What a wonderful surprise.
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Professor Wotheridge, what are you doing here?
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I am about to negotiate the purchase of a Christmas tree.
B
I didn't know you celebrated Christmas.
A
I don't, but I like a Christmas tree. It reminds me of my childhood. Tell me, how's Henry?
B
Tired and worried.
A
Raising money for the new cathedral, huh?
B
Slow work, Professor. And you, how's your book coming?
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Oh, splendidly. Greatest history of Rome since Gibbon.
B
Oh, I'm sorry, Professor, but I must hurry along. The cathedral committee's meeting with Henry and I really should be there.
A
Well, one of these days we'll have time for a nice talk again. Over here. For Henry's cathedral. But this coin, it has very little value, I'm afraid. Just an old Roman coin. I picked it up years ago in Italy.
B
Oh, it's a wonderful contribution.
A
Nonsense. Julia, what's the matter?
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Nothing, I. Oh, if Henry and I could only spend Christmas back here where we were so happy with all our old friends. Sorry, that was really very childish of me. Goodbye, Professor.
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Goodbye, Julia. Why, professor, how nice to see you again. How are you? And how well you look after all these years. Well, don't you remember me? Let's see, it wasn't Vienna, was it? Ah, Vienna. Beautiful old Vienna. When I was lecturing on Roman history. Ah, what splendid lectures they were. And what a One. You were with the ladies. I see you remembering that. I. I've been standing on the corner watching you, Professor. You and Julia. You know Julia? In a way, yes. Poor girl. Why, she's unhappy. Yes. When were you in Vienna? Oh, many times. I. I'm interested in Julia, professor and Henry. What seems to be their trouble? Oh, no special trouble, I imagine. Henry's a bishop now. Oh, yes. That used to be his church over there. St Timothy perishing from neglect. Ah. Such a nice little church. Well, delighted to have seen you again, Professor Strange. Unless I've completely lost my memory, I've never seen that fellow before in my life. Julia.
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Oh, I'm terribly sorry I'm so late, Henry. Has everyone gone?
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Yes, dear. Some time ago.
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Another argument, Henry?
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Either we build a cathedral the way Mrs. Hamilton wants it, or it won't be built at all.
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You didn't give in to her.
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Indeed not. I had the most unchristian impulse to take those blueprints and give her a good whack over her mink coat.
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I beg your pardon, Bishop.
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Yes, Ms. Cassaway?
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Mr. Trevor's on the phone. Oh, tell him the bishop will call him back. Please, after dinner. Yes, Mrs. Brown. Henry, what's happened to you? To us? To our marriage?
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Well, that's a strange question to ask.
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We used to be so happy. We used to make other people happy. Oh, Henry, that was your gift. You're no financier. You're not a promoter.
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Julia, I want this cathedral. I want its light to shine.
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Yes, Henry. Oh. Oh, here's a contribution I collected.
A
But what is it?
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It's an old Roman coin from Professor Wutherich.
A
What does he think I can do with it?
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Well, it's the beginning. And now all you need is another $4 million.
A
Julia, don't be flippant about this. Well, if dinner's ready, let's have it over with. I've got a lot of work to do tonight.
B
The silk stick. Very good, Matilda. Oh, thank you, Mrs. Brown.
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Julia, I was just thinking. Tomorrow, perhaps we could spend the day together. Oh, Henry, call on the professor. Maybe have lunch at Michelle's.
B
Michelle's? Oh, it's been years since we've been there. Please forgive me.
A
Yes, Ms. Cassoway?
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Mr. Trevor simply insists upon talking to you, Junior. Well, he's on the cathedral committee, isn't he? Well, go ahead, dear. You better talk.
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Very well, Mr. Pepper. I'll be there. 10:30 tomorrow morning. Good night. You may as well go home now, Ms. Cassoway.
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Oh, but there's still a Great deal of work to do, sir.
A
You're a secretary, not a machine. I'll run along.
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Oh, thank you. Don't forget you have a speech to make tomorrow at the junior assembly.
A
Oh, no. What time?
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It's a luncheon meeting. One o'. Clock. Good night, Bishop.
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Good night, Miss Cassoway. Oh, dear Lord, what am I to do? Can't you help me? Can't you tell me? Oh, please. Please help me. Yes? Good evening. What can I do for you? That is the question, Henry. The question is, what can I do for you? Look, I'm afraid you must telephone for an appointment. I haven't finished dinner. I know that, Henry. But you asked for help. You know I asked for. Who told you I asked for help? Well, you're known to be a good man, and you were heard. I was instructed to come here and answer to your prayer. Who are you? I'm an angel. I. I beg your pardon? An angel. An angel. I knew it. I've been working too hard. Yes. My, now, don't be alarmed. I know it's hard to believe, but now, this is my district, you see, and I do. Mind if I sit down? Oh, please do. Now, let's see. You have some problems concerning the building of a new cathedral? Yes. Henry, don't you believe I am what I say I am? Well, how can I? I've nothing but your word for it. But you are a bishop. You, of all people can trust the word of an angel. What do you propose to do? Perform a miracle, if necessary. Well, why don't you just create a cathedral with a wave of your hand? Oh, now, come, come. You wouldn't want me to do that. How would you explain it? Well, I. Henry, is anything wrong?
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Oh, I'm sorry.
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Oh, Julia. How have you been? I'm Dudley. Henry is engaging me to help him with his work.
B
Oh, you mean you're going to be his assistant?
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That's it exactly. I'm going to help Henry to get some relaxation.
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Oh, that's just what I've been praying for.
A
Oh, you too?
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Oh, I'm so relieved, Henry. Where do you come from, Dudley?
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All around. Julia, this man claims he's an I. I've been doing some social service work downtown. Julia, if you don't mind, I must talk to this. This gentleman alone.
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Oh, of course. I'll wait in the dining room. Good night.
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Good night, Julia. I'll see you in the morning. In the morning? Bright and early. Are you quite sure you're an angel? I know it isn't easy, Henry, but you've just got to take me on faith. Yes, but for how long? Until you can utter another prayer and say that you have no further need of me. Julia's waiting, Henry. Yes, I know, but I still don't under. Dudley. Dudley, where are you? Dudley?
B
Henry, what's the rest of Dudley's name?
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I. I don't know.
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Henry. You look so pale. And you're trembling.
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A lesser man would quiver.
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Oh, you'll feel better after you've eaten. And Matilda's baked your favorite dessert, dear. Angel food. Ca.
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Good morning, Henry. Well, here I am. Completely at your service, Dudley. I didn't sleep 20 minutes last night. I. I'm in a highly nervous condition. Ah. Well, then the first thing will happen. Oh, good morning, Julia.
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Good morning, Dudley. Lovely.
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Oh, lovely.
B
Henry and I going out together.
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Oh, Julia, I'm terribly sorry, but we can't. I. I've got to see Mr. Trevor at 10:30. And after that, there's the Junior Assembly.
B
But you promised, Henry. Couldn't Dudley represent you at those meetings?
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Yes, could I? That's out of the question, Dudley. I'd like to speak to my wife alone. Of course. In the hall, dear Julia. See, the trouble is. Well, that man in there. I can't explain.
B
You needn't try, Henry. This is the way it is. And this is the way it always will be. I'll see you at dinner, dear.
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Dudley, what are you doing? Just looking through your files, Henry. Well, I see that Mrs. Hamerton is placed a million dollars to the cathedral fund. But she hasn't sent her check. Never mind that file. Let's work for a bookkeeper, not for an agent. Work for a bookkeeper. Well, well. So you're beginning to believe in me. I don't know who you are or where you came from. I only wish you'd make haste. Why? Because the cathedral must be built. Well, obviously, that's the most important thing. Or because Julia must be happy. It's going to be difficult to help you, Henry, until I'm sure what it is you really want. Yes, well, I'm afraid you'll have to excuse me. Mr. Trevor likes punctuality. Run along, Henry. This fire's in an awful mess. I think I'll reorganize it. I still think you're wasting your time on unimportant details. Nothing's unimportant, Henry. Now, remember, we're interested in even the lowliest sparrows. What's up, everybody? It's Bretzky. And America is turning 250, and I can't Think of a better way to celebrate that than playing on an American owned social casino. Spinquest.com with all of your favorite games, Live crabs, bubble craps, live blackjack, there's no better place to play for free and win real cash prizes. Spinquest.com Spinquest is a free to play social casino void where prohibited. Visit spinquest.com for more details.
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Call 1-800-GRAINGER click grainger.com or just stop by Grainger for the ones who get it done. Hello.
A
Oh, hello, Debbie. Come on in.
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How'd you do that just now? All those cards in Daddy file. You just waved your head and they all jumped out and jumped back in again.
A
Oh, that's just my system of rearranging card files.
B
Do it again.
A
Oh, some other time, eh, Debbie?
B
You're Dudley, aren't you? Mommy says you're very nice.
A
Well, it's extremely kind of Mummy.
B
She says that maybe with you here, maybe we'll get to see Daddy once in a while.
A
Yes, maybe we will, Debbie.
B
Come along, dear. Oh, are you going out to the park? I'm going to play in the snow. Bye, Dudley.
A
Bye, Debbie. Have a good time.
B
Get in, Dudley. What are you doing here?
A
Oh, I often walk in the park. Well, Debbie seems to be having a fine time over there.
B
Well, aren't you supposed to be working?
A
I always take a walk before lunch. Relaxing, you know.
B
I wish you convinced Henry of that.
A
Speaking of lunch, dear, I thought I'd go to Michelle's. You ever been there?
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Michelle? Oh, yes. We used to go there years ago.
A
Well, how about going there today?
B
You and I? To Michelle? Oh, no, no, I couldn't.
A
Why not?
B
Well, I, I.
A
Well, surely you don't think Henry would mind?
B
Oh, no, no, it isn't that. It's. Well, you see, I gave Matilda the day off to go Christmas shopping, so I'm looking after Debbie.
A
Oh, yes. Isn't that a big. Here's matilda now.
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Hello, Mrs. Brown. Matilda, I just thought, Ms. Brown. I just thought that if you wish, I'll take Debbie home. But Matilda, you're sharpening. All finished. I finished it so quick it was just Like a. A miracle.
A
The heck you say.
B
I thought. I thought Debbie might like to go home, make Christmas cookies. Oh, I'm sure she'd love to. You bell, then, Mrs. Brome. I'll just go and get her.
A
Well, Juliet. Michelle.
B
Why, I think that would be very nice.
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Good.
B
Sadly, just a minute ago, when you said you saw Matilda.
A
Yes?
B
Oh, it's nonsense.
A
What's nonsense?
B
You were looking the other way when you said you saw her.
A
I was?
B
I mean, I thought you were. Oh, how silly of me. Wait here, Dudley. I'll say goodbye to Jessie. I'm so glad you knew about Michelle, Dudley. So nice to be back here again. Only.
A
Only?
B
Well, you seem to know so much, it seems. Makes me feel uncomfortable.
A
Thank you. I'm sorry I ever learned anything. You have memories of this place, don't you?
B
It was in this restaurant that Henry asked me to marry.
A
Yes, I know. You know, I. I mean, I know how you would feel.
B
Well.
A
Well, now, there's a fortune teller over there. You care to have your palm read?
B
Oh, no, thank you. Would you?
A
I know too much about myself as I do.
B
And I know so little about myself.
A
Really? May I look at your hand?
B
Can you tell fortunes, too?
A
Oh, it's not too difficult.
B
Well, what do you see?
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I never noticed you. Your eyes are green. Well, I see a great deal of happiness. I see a woman who's adored. I see a rich, full life.
B
Do you see Henry's new cathedral?
A
No, that's not very clear. There's a kind of a fuzziness about that.
B
And Debbie?
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Oh, no need to worry about her. She'll be like you, Julia. She'll have youth and beauty, no matter how old she lives to be.
B
But people do grow old.
A
No, not everybody. Only those who were born old to begin with. You, Julia, were born young. You'll remain that way.
B
I wish I could believe you.
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You may.
B
You haven't looked at my hand once. I simply don't know what to think of you, Dudley, with your serious or joking.
A
I'm at the most serious when I am joking.
B
Well, then maybe you should. Oh, no.
A
Now what?
B
That table over there. No, don't look. Three ladies, all on the cathedral committee. And they're simply glaring at me.
A
They will glare back.
B
They. They saw you holding my hand.
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Oh, well, if you excuse me. I better do something about that, hadn't I?
B
What did you do to them, Dudley? Now they're smiling at me. They're waving. Good.
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Smile and wave back. Yes. I didn't do anything to them. I just introduced myself Chatted a moment, ordered a drink.
B
A drink? They took it.
A
Oh, stingers. They're really very friendly, Julia. They promised to drop by our table a little later.
B
Dudley, may I make an understatement?
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Oh, please do.
B
You're a very unusual man.
A
I'll let you in on Dudley, Julia. You're quite right. It isn't every day that one can have lunch with a full fledged angel. Julia's very happy not knowing, of course, who Dudley really is. Well, they're walking home now, and who should they meet on the street but Julia's old friend, Professor Wuthery. Julia, what wonderful luck meeting you again. But this man. Are you with him?
B
Yes, of course. Dudley, this is Professor Weatherby.
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Oh, go on. The professor knows me well. The university in Vienna. Young man, I don't believe you've ever been near Vienna. Isn't that ridiculous? It's a game he plays you there. He always pretends he's never seen me before.
B
But Dudley is Henry's new assistant.
A
You really know this Powell?
B
Well, of course I do.
A
Well, in that case, how about dropping into my humble diggings for a bit of yuletide chair?
B
Oh, I'd love to, but only for a moment.
A
Come along, Dudley. Just around the corner. Ah. Just enough left in the box is your glass, Dudley. We'll drink to Julia. To a charming lady. Ah, to a charming lady. You've noticed? Yes. Isn't it more remarkable that you have? When you want to know about a woman, ask the old man. They know
B
now. When are you going to show us your book?
A
My book? Never.
B
Oh, please.
A
You say you're writing a book. You didn't know? You didn't tell me. I described the book in detail in the course of those lectures I gave in Vienna. Junior, I am now certain this fellow's an imposter. Oh, you mean that book? I thought he finished that years ago. No, I haven't written a word of it. Not one word.
B
But why not?
A
Because I can't think of anything original to say. I never could find the right words either to tell a pretty girl or to write a book. Not even when you had this coin to instill?
B
Why, that's the coin that you gave to Henry, Professor.
A
I borrowed it from Henry's desk. You wasted your time. It's worthless. Oh, on the contrary, Professor. Now, this coin is one of the rarest of all antiquities. Really? Only 100 of these coins were minted by Julius Caesar 2,000 years ago. That was when Cleopatra visited Rome. But presumably these coins were used to pay her Hotel bill. Why, isn't that amazing? Nobody knows about it. Except, of course, Caesar's wife knew about it. She had the coins destroyed. But this one she overlooked. It's an unwritten chapter in history, and you, professor, will write it. Do you know any more stories like that? Oh, any number of them. You're a curious fellow, Dudley. Where do you come from? What if I told you I came from another planet? Would you believe me? I doubt it.
B
I'd believe you, Dudley.
A
Yes, and you'd be right. We all come from our own little planet. That's why we're all different. That's what makes life interesting.
B
It's getting late. I must be leaving.
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Really Sorry, professor. If my wine bottle wasn't empty, we could say goodbye with another drink. Empty? Why, yes. I had barely enough. The bottle, it's half full. Well, you save it for next time, professor. I'm really getting old and I can't see what's inside a wine bottle. Dudley. Yes, my friend? There's one thing that troubles me greatly. Oh, that's right. To write a history is a tremendous task. I wonder, will I have time to finish it? You'll finish it. You'll have time. I don't know why I'd ask you that question. How would you know? You see, for quite a while now, every time I passed the cemetery I felt as if I were apartment hunting.
B
Goodbye, professor. Come and see us, please.
A
I will. I will. Goodbye.
B
And.
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And God bless you both. Thank you, professor. I'll pass that recommendation along.
B
Henry?
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I'm in the study, Julia.
B
Oh, I'm sorry I'm so late, dear.
A
Hello, Henry. Good evening, Dudley.
B
Oh, we had the most marvelous time. I wish you could have been with us.
A
Yes, I wish I had.
B
Is Debbie asleep yet?
A
No, she's waiting to see you.
B
Oh, good. I'll go right up.
A
I trust you spent a profitable afternoon, Dudley. Oh, yes, yes. Did you have a profitable afternoon, Henry? Not very. Dudley, I'd like to speak to you for a moment. Certainly. Should you excuse me if I lock the door? I'd rather not be interrupted. Dudley, can you prove to me that you're an angel?
B
Proof?
A
You mean a document? Oh, now, surely you of all people should know that angels need no passport. I'd be a lot happier if I could see you perform a miracle. Of what kind? Well, make this desk rise up and fly around the room. Oh, now, Henry, cut it out. Henry, please. I didn't come here you to tell tricks. I'm surprised at you. Well, I don't believe you're an angel at all. I think you're a demon. Right, Henry? No, don't say a word like that. Well, anyway, now you know how I feel. Yes. Now. Now, wait a minute, Dudley. I am not through yet. There's another matter.
B
I.
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The door. I locked that door. He. He just opened it and walked out. Dudley. Wait a minute. Dudley. Now it's locked again. Dudley.
B
Oh, he went upstairs, dear, to say goodnight to Deborah.
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Oh.
B
Is anything wrong?
A
Oh, no. No, nothing's wrong. You. You look very well, Julian. Very bright and gay.
B
Oh, I feel gay, Henry.
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I think you're an excellent wife, Julian.
B
Why, thank you.
A
And I'm proud of you.
B
Thank you again, dear.
A
Do you think I'm an excellent husband?
B
Of course, dear. Henry, I hope you're going to take things easier now with Dudley here. I think he's very able.
A
You do?
B
Yes. He knows so many things.
A
What, for instance?
B
Well, you should have seen him this afternoon. We met Professor Wotheridge. Why, Dudley knows more about history than he does.
A
He should. He's been at it longer.
B
What?
A
Nothing, dear. Nothing. I. I'll go up and say goodnight to Debbie.
B
But don't you know any more stories, Mr. Dudley?
A
Oh, I know hundreds of stories. Debbie, for instance? Well, now, let me see. I know a story that happened many, many years ago. It's about a boy named David. Now, he was a shepherd and the town where he lived was called the Bethlehem.
B
That's where the star was.
A
Yeah, that's right. I mean, David lived long before the star. Well, one night, Miss, David was out in the hills tending his sheep. He was playing the harp and singing. Then all of a sudden, an angel came down and spoke to him.
B
But how did David know he was an angel?
A
Oh, he didn't know. That's the way it always is. Angels come down and put ideas into people's heads. And then people feel very proud of themselves because they think it was all their own idea. Anyway, this angel spoke to David. He said, one of your lambs has strained. So David put aside his harp and went out into the darkness to find the lamb. Of course, the angel guided him. And when David found the lamb, he saw a great ferocious lion there, too.
B
Oh, dear.
A
So David said to the lion, you get away from that land. And the lion said, you get away from me or I'll eat you, too.
B
Did David run away?
A
No, and that's the point. The angel put another idea into his head. So David took out his sling and hurled the stone and hit the lion right between the eyes.
B
Served him good. And Right.
A
I think it did. And David picked up the man and carried him back to the fold. And then he felt so happy that he took his harp and made up a new song. It started like this. The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures. He leadeth me beside the still water. Oh, come in, Henry. I think you can deal with the rest of this some other time.
B
Good night, Daddy.
A
Good night, darling. Well, if you're ready, Dudley so is denied. Oh, thank you, Henry. Thank you.
B
So right after dinner, Henry, we'll get a taxi and go down to St. Timothy.
A
St. Timothy's tonight.
B
Hey, everybody. Lady Luck here. And we're celebrating America's 250th birthday. Now, all summer long, I'm going to be celebrating by playing on spinquest.com, which is an American owned social casino. It obviously features over 1000 slot games and live blackjack, live craps, live bubble craps. Head on over to spinquest.com, get yourself a $30 coin pack for just 10 bucks.
A
Spinquest is a free to play social casino void where prohibited. Visit spinquest.com for more details. When she said, I don't dance now I make money moves. That was a mission statement for a whole new generation. Respect.
B
But that's not the Mount Rushmore. Listen. Cash rules everything around me. When line drop, it changed the whole hustle. The greatest tracks are never finished. They're just debated forever. Introducing the Sprite living track list. 50 tracks that shape the culture from six decades of hip hop. Scan the QR code on a Sprite or Sprite Zero Sugar to see the full breakdown. Obey your thirst, Sprite. Oh, of course, dear. The choir's rehearsing for the benefit they're giving. Henry, we promised Mr. Miller Jr.
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I've telephoned Mrs. Hamilton. I apologize to her for some of the things I said. I had to. She said I may call on her tonight.
B
But the rehearsal's just for you, dear.
A
A million dollars from Mrs. Hamilton, dear, is far more important.
B
But you're his bishop, Henry. And I just don't like going alone.
A
My. My evening seems quite free, Henry. No, definitely not. I was just about to suggest that. I see Mrs. Hamilton and you take Julia to St. Timothy's you, Mrs. Hamilton? Oh, no. Just listen. Yes, yes.
B
Oh, Dudley, would you mind very much going with me?
A
Julia. Well, Henry. Yes, I. I think that might be a very good solution. Thank you, Dudley.
B
You are welcome, Henry. Mrs. Bro.
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I'm delighted to see you.
B
Oh, Mr. Miller, this is Mr. Dudley the Bishop's new assistant, Mr. Dudley.
A
A pleasure. Oh, thank you, Mr. Miller. The Bishop will try to get here later. Something important came up.
B
He didn't want you to delay rehearsal,
A
Mrs. B. I'm terribly embarrassed. Only two of the boys have come. It's just too difficult trying to compete with basketball and Christmas. Oh, I wouldn't worry. Missing Milan. They'll all show up. Hiya, boys. Hi. What are you saying?
B
Me?
A
Yeah.
B
Chris Grantham.
A
You any good?
B
I doubt it.
A
Now, how about giving out?
B
You mean along? No, no.
A
You got Rupert with you. Hi, Rupert.
B
Hi.
A
What do you say?
B
It's okay by me.
A
Okay. I'll start you off at the piano.
B
Away in a manger. No crib for his bed. The little king.
A
Look, the other boy. There he is.
B
Maybe basketball isn't so important after all.
A
You can be prouder than Mr. Miller. They sing beautifully, but they never sing so well.
B
Like angels. I'm very glad to see that you've come to your senses. Census, Bishop Brougham. You needn't make any further apologies.
A
Thank you, Mrs. Hamilton. And in view of your generosity, the George B. Hamilton Memorial Chapel shall be located wherever you specify in the new cathedral.
B
Now, there's one thing more. That window depicting St. George and the dragon.
A
Yes?
B
I should very much like the countenance of St. George to resemble my late husband.
A
Of course, Mrs. Hamilton. And whom do you see as the dragon?
B
Dragon?
A
Oh.
B
Oh, any old dragon.
A
Thank you. Now, if you'll excuse me, Julia's waiting for me at St. Timothy's and I. I. Well, that's strange.
B
Is anything the matter?
A
This chair, I. I can't get up. It's stuck to my. I'm stuck to it.
B
Stuck to the chair?
A
Yes. It doesn't seem quite right, does it?
B
Stephen?
A
Yes, madam?
B
There's something wrong with the bishop's chair.
A
It must be the new varnish. The furniture people should have warned us. I do hope I'm not harming the chair. Oh, this is preposterous. Awkward situation, isn't it? Perhaps if you give me a little pull at the back. Stephen. Yes, sir. Again, please. Your trousers, sir. I'm afraid if we pull any harder. Mrs. Hamilton, might I use the telephone?
B
Yes. Yes, of course. It's right over there. Can you walk?
A
After a fashion. That chair, madam, it clings to him like a brother.
B
Well, do something, Stephen.
A
Call the shop.
B
Get a plumber.
A
Hello? Hello, Matilda? This is Bishop brougham. I'm at Mrs. Hamilton's. I want you to come here at once with another pair of Trousers? Well, what difference does it make? Yes, just bring me another pair of trousers. Thank you.
B
I'm so sorry this has happened.
A
Oh, if I could only get in touch with Julia. Oh, Dudley. Dudley. This is all he's doing. Dudley.
B
Now, now, Bishop, don't be nervous. Have a chair.
A
Thank you, Mrs. Hamilton. I have one.
B
I can't imagine what happened to Henry. He was so sure he'd meet his things.
A
Well, I suppose he's detained at Mrs. Hamilton.
B
Of course. You know, Dudley, it's a strange thing. You seem to be able to make me feel as if everything's going to be all right.
A
Oh, everything could be all right for everyone if people would only learn to behave like human beings.
B
Well, it's a lovely night, isn't it? Oh, driver, could you take us through the park?
A
But that's out of your way, lady. Are you getting bored with us, driver? Oh, I'll. I'll drive you by way of Mexico City if you want me to. That's the trouble with this country. Too many people that don't know where they're going and they want to get their. Now, I'd call you two very unusual people. Thank you. You're very possessive.
B
Oh, that was really a close.
A
Did you see the way it just missed that truck? Like. Like a miracle. It is, I know, but just don't open. Playing a hand. Hey, look at the rice. So we are. Julia, we're going ice skating.
B
Oh, no, we mustn't. It's too late. We couldn't. You really think we could?
A
You can stop here, driver. We're going ice skating. Oh, you too? Well, this is it, Sylvester. What do we owe you? Not a cent, my friend. You want to know why? Because you and the little lady here have restored my fate in human nature. Well, good night, Dudley. Good night, Julia.
B
Good night, Sylvester.
A
Ah, that's Sylvester for a noble soul. His children and his children's children will rise up and call him blessed.
B
Oh, this has been the most wonderful evening I've had in years.
A
Ah, it's the most wonderful evening I've had in centuries. Oh, you're a beautiful skater, Julia. In fact, you're beautiful. Well, well, you've come home. Hello, Henry.
B
Well, I thought you were going to meet us at St. Timothy's dear Julia,
A
it's almost 10 o'. Clock.
B
Henry, we've been ice skating.
A
Ice skating?
B
You should have seen Dudley. He's marvelous.
A
Henry, I'm a whiz.
B
And those boys at St. Timothy's the way they stay. It was simply heavenly.
A
Yes, I'M sure it was. Did you have a successful meeting with Mrs. Hamilton, Henry? Quite satisfactory, thank you.
B
Good. I'll be right down. Henry.
A
Dudley. Yes, Henry. You. You deliberately stopped me from joining you and Julia by the seat of my pants. Well, now, Julia had a very good time. But I did not. Now, Henry, if you had sent me to represent you with Mrs. Hamilton, I would have gone. You didn't, so I represented you with your wife. Is that part of the normal duties of an angel? An angel? Sometimes, Henry, angels must rush in where fools fear to tread. I haven't the faintest idea what that means, and I don't want it explained to me. In any event, you can go now, Dudley. I've solved my problem. Mrs. Hamilton is giving the money. Now, that was a foregone conclusion, providing you were willing to make a slight sacrifice of your principles. Huh. Don't you think it's worth it for this. This glorious edifice? I'm not so sure of its glory at a time like this. You know. These are rather lean years for the world, Henry. So many people need food, so many people need shelter. Now, that big roof could make so many little roofs. I'm dealing with a materialistic, selfish woman. She wouldn't listen to talk like that. Did you try? You came here so that I could have a cathedral. Well, I've got a cathedral. And I want you to get out of my house and out of my life and away from Julia. Suppose you pray for that, Henry. After all, it was your prayer that brought me here. Very well. I pray it. Oh. Oh, Henry. Now, come on. I'm afraid that's no prayer. It was right from my heart. I want you to go. Well, Julia doesn't. Julia. Get out. Get out. Henry, Julia is about to come down those stairs. Don't you let her see you like this. Henry. Try to calm yourself.
B
Dudley.
A
He's gone.
B
Oh, Debbie's awake. She wants to say goodnight to him.
A
I just told you, Dudley is gone.
B
Why did he leave so suddenly?
A
Because I got rid of him. I told him to go away. I fired him.
B
Why?
A
Because he's incompetent and I cannot stand the sight of him.
B
Henry.
A
Believe me, Julia, I know what I'm doing. Two days have passed since Dudley disappeared, much to the relief of Bishop Henry Brougham. And now it's early evening on Christmas Eve.
B
Your calls, Bishop. And there's a taxi waiting for you outside.
A
Thank you, Ms. Cassowary.
B
Bishop Brown, there's still no word from Mr. Dudley.
A
Ms. Cassaway, I discharged Mr. Dudley. There's no reason at all to hear from him.
B
Yes, sir.
A
Now, if you don't mind, please tell Mrs. Brome that the taxi's waiting.
B
I'm ready and waiting.
A
Oh, good. Here's our list of calls.
B
I thought we could go to the tr. First Henry, then to the vandal. Julia.
A
Hiya, Julia.
B
What. Sylvester, what are you doing here?
A
Well, when the call come in for a cab, I sure hightailed it over here. I was hoping maybe there'd be another skating party. Hey, where's Dudley?
B
I don't know.
A
Look, look, you got a preacher with you?
B
Yes, this is.
A
Don't tell me, don't tell me. A wedding. You and Dudley.
B
Sylvester, this is my husband, Bishop Room.
A
How do you do? And now, if you don't mind, we'd like to go to North Maple Street. Good evening, Ms. Castlemaine.
B
Mr. Dudley. Oh, how nice to see you again.
A
Thank you.
B
We've been so worried about you and poor Mrs. Brown. Have I seen you? Have I heard from you?
A
Where is she?
B
Well, she and the bishop are making Christmas calls. Then they go to St. Timothy's for the midnight service.
A
Oh, that's. It's Christmas Eve. Oh, you should be home. Ms. Cathaway.
B
I'm typing the bishop sermon.
A
I'll type that for you.
B
Oh, no, no.
A
The bishop told me you should be with your family.
B
Well, if you really. Oh, thank you, Mr. Dudley.
A
Merry Christmas, Mildred.
B
Merry Christmas, Mr. Dudley.
A
Well, I got a lot of this. Henry's Christmas sermon. A new cathedral. You know what? It sucks to be bored. But when I get on my phone and play real casino games on spinquest.com the time flies by. That two hour wait at the DMV seems like 10 minutes. Play your favorite slots, live blackjack, live preps with a live dealer. New players. 30 coin packs are on sale for 10 bucks. Play spinquest.com and you'll never be bored again. Spinquest is a free to play social casino void where prohibited. Visit spendquest.com for more details.
B
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A
Mrs. Hamilton's magnificent gesture. Money pledges needed. Sorry, Henry. That's no sermon for Christmas. Honestly. Suppose you tell them. Suppose you tell them the story of an empty stocking. Once upon a midnight clear, there was a child's cry, A blazing star hung over a stable, and wise men came with birthday gifts. We'd forgotten many things during the centuries, but not that much. Whom did you say is calling, sir? I'm Dudley Stevens, Bishop Brome's assistant. Would you mind telling Mrs. Hamilton I'm here? I don't believe she's expecting you, sir. I'm sure she isn't. Yes, sir. Halfway to the music room. The music room, sir? Yes. There's a harp in there. I wonder if she'd mind if I. Oh, I'm afraid she would, sir. Oh, she would. Well, in that event, I'll just play this harpsichord here. Yes, sir. Hang on. You.
B
Who are you?
A
Good evening, Mrs. Hamilton.
B
My butler said you told him you're Bishop Brome's assistant.
A
That's right, Mr. Hamilton. The bishop will be along a little later. That music you're playing, I thought you'd recognize it.
B
There's no one living who knows that composition except me.
A
Yes. What a shame that Alan Cartwright died. That only you and I would know his music.
B
Alan Cartwright died nearly 40 years ago. You couldn't have known him.
A
I'm much older than you think, Mrs. Hamilton. Now, tell me about him. Alan Cartwright?
B
What is there to tell? He was the only man I ever loved. That I was afraid of poverty. He went away and I never saw him again.
A
So you married George Hamilton.
B
I made George happy, I think.
A
But because you didn't love him, you spent a fortune honoring his memory since his death.
B
A fortune in empty monuments.
A
They're no more empty than your own life, Mrs. Hallibur. Since you sent the man you loved away, you haven't allowed yourself to love anyone else. You've withdrawn into a shell, a cold and, alas, selfish woman.
B
What.
A
What can I do? Well, I'll tell you what you do. Break that shell. Now, think of what you can do for others and you'll no longer have time to think of yourself. Forgive yourself, Mrs. Hamilton, if Alan Cartwright forgave you long ago.
B
Do you really think he did?
A
I know he did.
B
How? How did you know about Alan Cartwright?
A
That doesn't matter, Mrs. Hamerton. They're at the front door now. And me and Julie.
B
I can't see them now.
A
Oh, yes, go on. You'll see them. You'll go to the hall and greet them in your usual warm hearted manner.
B
You're not leaving?
A
I'm afraid I have to. I have a great deal of work. Bishop and Mrs. Brougham are here, madam. Now, don't keep them waiting.
B
How do you do, Mrs. Hamilton? Julia, how nice. And Henry. Merry Christmas, Henry. I said Merry Christmas.
A
Oh, yes. Merry Christmas, Mrs. Hamilton.
B
He's gone. Why, he's gone already. Gone? Who's gone? Dudley.
A
I might have known it.
B
Where did he go to? Oh, that poor man. He said he had so much work to do. Now, Henry, you must make him take some rest.
A
I've been trying to make him do just that.
B
Oh, I can't thank you enough for sending him to me. How did you ever find him, Henry?
A
More or less of an accident, I suppose.
B
More or less of a miracle talking with this wonderful, understanding man. Henry, I've changed my mind about the cathedral.
A
You have?
B
Yes. I'm going to give my money to those who need it. To the poor, the homeless, the unappreciated. And I want you to direct the spending of it. Now, you see what Dudley has done, Henry?
A
Yes, I see.
B
And you understand, Mrs. Hamilton?
A
Julia, forgive me, but I have to leave. There's someone I must see immediately.
B
Henry.
A
Henry, my dear fellow. Sit down, sit down. A glass of sherry? No, thank you, Professor. Oh, but I insist. Henry. You see this bottle? Now watch. I fill two glasses. Behold. The bottle is still half full. Always half full. Dudley's been here? Yes, and that bottle isn't all. He told me to look up some ancient texts in the library which no living scholar ever has been able to decipher. I read them as if they were English. Henry, this Dudley fellow is not like the rest of us. He says he's an angel. An angel from heaven? That I'm not so sure about. An angel? That's too bad. He's such a nice fellow. He's brought nothing but disaster to me. He's made Julia despise me. Don't be ridiculous. Why, you and Julia love each other. You always have. That's only partly true. I love Julia. And why don't you fight for her?
B
Fight?
A
How can I fight against. Don't you have a tremendous advantage? Advantage? Over an angel? Precisely. He is an angel. Julia's a creature of earth. He's a woman. Henry, you're a man. Yes. Yes, I am. And if I were you, I'd get myself home. That's where he'll be waiting for Julia. Excuse me, Professor. You. Oh, Merry Christmas.
B
Henry, is that you, dear?
A
Hello, Julia. Dudley, I. I came to say goodbye. I have to be moving along. Oh.
B
Well, where will you be going?
A
Wherever they send me. Then my superior officers.
B
Will we ever see you again?
A
They seldom send us to the same place twice, Julia. We might form attachment.
B
I don't know what you're talking about.
A
Of course not. Julia. Julia, I don't want to leave you.
B
Why?
A
There are a few people who know the secret of making heaven here on Earth. And you're one of those rare people.
B
You frighten me, Dudley. I. I think you ought to go.
A
No, Julia. Please don't send me away.
B
What are you saying?
A
That I'm tired of being a wanderer? I'm tired of an existence where one is neither hot nor cold, hungry nor sore.
B
No, you must go away and never come back. Don't look at me like that, Dudley. No, Henry.
A
Henry. It's all right, Julia. It's all right, my darling. Go upstairs, dear. I'll handle this alone. As for you, I have never before had to fight an angel. But I suggest you take off your coat and put up your. Your dukes. Now, now, now. Why do you want to fight me, Henry? Because you're a thief trying to steal the love that belongs to me. Henry, do you realize that as an angel, I could quite readily destroy you with a bolt of lightning? I don't care. Julia means more to me than my life. I'm not going to lose her.
B
Ah.
A
Then I have news for you. I'm going. I'll believe that when I see it happen. Oh, no, you won't. Because when I'm gone, you will never know that an angel visited this house. And Julia? What about her? There would be no memory with her either. Or with Debbie or the professor or anyone else. I don't trust you. You may, Henry, because your prayer has been answered. That's not true. I prayed for a cathedral. No, you prayed for guidance, and that thing didn't do. Oh, I'm being paid. Just a minute, please. Well, goodbye, Henry. Oh, if we should need you again, will you come back? Oh, not I. I'm requesting an assignment at the other end of the universe. Is that because I was so difficult? Oh, no. This difficulty was in me. When immortal finds himself envying the mortal trusted to his care, it's a definite sign of danger. Yes, yes, I heard you the first time. Now, go on upstairs. Take her in your arms, Henry, and kiss her for me. You lucky devil. Julia. Julia.
B
Quiet, darling. You wake Nippy.
A
Are you all right?
B
Oh, yes, of course I am. Henry. Did you get that for Nepe yet what could he. That little angel there on her bed.
A
Why. Why, no.
B
I can't imagine where it came from. Henry, what is it?
A
Oh, I don't know. I. I have the most inexplicable feeling of happiness. Why, so do I. I love you, Julia.
B
I love you, Henry. Listen. The bells from St. Timothy.
A
Almost midnight.
B
We will have to hurry.
A
Oh, my sermon. It was all about the cathedral. It will never do now.
B
Don't worry, dear. You'll think of something. Something even better. Merry Christmas, Henry.
A
Merry Christmas, darling.
B
Heaven and nature sing and heaven and nature sing and heaven and heaven and nature.
A
Tonight, I want to tell you the story of an empty stocking. Once upon a midnight clear there was a child cry. A blazing star hung over a stable and wise men came with birthday gifts. We have forgotten many things through the centuries, but not that night. We celebrate it with stars, on Christmas trees, with the sound of bells. And with gifts. But especially with gifts. You give me a book, I give you a tie. Aunt Martha has always wanted an orange squeezer. Uncle Harry could do with a new pipe. Oh, we forget nobody, adult or child. All the stockings are filled. All that is, except one. And we have even forgotten to hang it up. The stockings of a child born in a manger. It's his birthday we're celebrating. Don't let us ever forget that. Let us ask ourselves what he would wish for most and then let each put in his share. Loving kindness, warm heart stretched out. And the tolerant. All the shining gifts to make a peace on earth. And here they are, that delightful pair, Cary Grant and Phyllis Baxter, back tonight will last remain as Henry, Herb Butterfield as the professor, normal bard as Mrs. Hamilton, Herb as Sylvester. He sashed down as Debbie and Francis Robinson, Eric Snowden, Helen Cleave, Hart McNair, Richard Field, Ronald Keith and Eddie Marr. A radio play was Adapted to by S.H. barnett Our Music composed and directed by Rudy Schrager.
B
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B
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Podcast: Harold’s Old Time Radio
Host: Harold’s Old Time Radio
Episode Date: July 19, 2026
Featured Cast: Cary Grant (Dudley), Phyllis Thaxter (Julia Brougham), [various]
Original Broadcast Format: Golden Age radio adaptation of the classic holiday film
This episode presents a radio adaptation of “The Bishop’s Wife,” a 1947 romantic fantasy about faith, love, and the true meaning of Christmas. The story centers on Bishop Henry Brougham, his struggle to raise money for a new cathedral, and the intervention of an urbane, mysterious angel, Dudley. The play explores themes of marital strain, spiritual renewal, and the power of kindness, with Cary Grant reprising his cinematic role as Dudley.
The episode is warm, magical, and gently humorous, blending the nostalgic charm of 1940s radio drama with timeless holiday themes. Cary Grant’s Dudley brings wit and lightness to the dialogue, balanced by sincere moments of reflection and emotional catharsis.
This adaptation of “The Bishop’s Wife” is not just festive nostalgia—it’s a poignant reminder that at the heart of every holiday, and every act of faith or charity, is the simple, spiritual gift of loving one another. The episode beautifully interweaves whimsical miracles with very real human struggles, offering a message as needed now as it was then.
End of Summary