A Date With Judy 44-08-01 (069) Father's Birthday

Summary

---

Episode Overview

Podcast: Harold's Old Time Radio
Episode: A Date With Judy 44-08-01 (069) "Father's Birthday"
Date: October 4, 2025
Host: Harold's Old Time Radio

This episode of "A Date with Judy" is a lively comedic romp centered on Mr. Foster's birthday. The Foster children, Judy and Randolph, attempt to show their appreciation for their often-overlooked father, leading to a day full of mishaps, misdirected affection, and classic family chaos. Their well-intentioned plans to spend the day giving their father happiness only result in misadventures and slapstick disasters, culminating in a surprisingly heartwarming twist.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Shopping for Father’s Birthday (01:21–05:10)

• Judy and Randolph struggle to select an appropriate birthday gift for their father on a meager budget.
  • Randolph suggests impractical gifts like a baseball bat, glove, a canoe, and a chemistry set.
  • Judy fantasizes about gifts she would actually want, joking about buying herself a present from Father.
  • Eventually, they settle on a smoking jacket—by charging it to their father’s own account (ironically making him pay for his own present).

Notable Quote:

“You bought a present for your father and you’re making him pay for it.”
— Mrs. Foster (04:03)

• Problem: They end up spending their own $2 on treats for themselves (baseball glove, snood, sodas), with nothing left for their father.

---

2. Feeling Guilty: The Idea for a Perfect Day (05:10–06:15)

• Mrs. Foster scolds the kids for spending the birthday present money on themselves.
• Judy, feeling guilty, devises a plan for the family to devote the whole day to making Father happy.

Notable Quote:

"For at least one day in his life, poor Father will know he’s loved and appreciated."
— Judy Foster (05:51)

---

3. Surprising Father at Work (07:19–08:33)

• Judy and Randolph barge into Mr. Foster’s office, determined to whisk him away.
  • Mr. Foster is swamped with a crucial business meeting about a patent with Mr. Quigley, but the kids are insistent.
  • Despite his protests, the children decide to visit Mr. Quigley at his hotel to ask him to reschedule.

Notable Quote:

"I don’t want to be happy. I just want my rights to this patent."
— Mr. Foster (07:48)

---

4. Well-Intentioned Sabotage: Involving Mr. Quigley (08:51–11:02)

• Judy and Randolph explain their mission to Mr. Quigley.
• Amused and bemused, Mr. Quigley cancels the meeting in favor of “filial affection.”
• Mr. Foster is devastated as his vital business opportunity evaporates.

---

5. The ‘Perfect’ Birthday at the Amusement Park (11:02–18:04)

• At the amusement park, the family’s idea of fun becomes Father's ordeal.
  • Judy invites her entire gang—and Mr. Quigley—to join, arranging for Mitzi, one of the young girls, to be Mr. Quigley’s date.
  • Mr. Foster is subjected to the chaos of the funhouse and the tunnel of love; Mr. Quigley proves an unlikely sport.

Memorable Moment:
Mitzi’s reaction to being paired with Mr. Quigley as her date:

“An older man? Oh, how marvelous! I adore men in their 20's.”
— Mitzi (12:52)
(Mr. Quigley is actually 45.)

---

6. Slapstick Escalates: Swimming, Dancing, and Total Exhaustion (19:15–23:16)

• After a picnic, the gang goes swimming—Mr. Quigley falls into the lake.
• The kids force Father to wear a too-tight borrowed swimsuit and join the fun.
• Next comes dancing at a pavilion, where Mr. Foster laments his fate and Mitzi tries to teach Mr. Quigley the latest dance moves.

Notable Quote:

"All I can say is I wish I was never born."
— Mr. Foster (19:26)

---

7. Back Home: The Aftermath and Surprise Outcome (23:15–25:59)

• Father lies in agony at home, surrounded by hot water bottles and ice bags.
• The children insist they were only trying to make his birthday special, but he declares he never wants another birthday again.
• Mr. Quigley calls—surprisingly grateful for the experience and, impressed by the Foster family’s warmth, grants Mr. Foster the patent he had feared losing.

Memorable Moment:

“He gave me the patent. He enjoyed the day! He actually enjoyed the day.”
— Mr. Foster (25:13)

• Mr. Quigley calls back—this time to ask Judy for Mitzi’s phone number, showing he’s taken a real shine to her.

---

8. Coda: A Running Joke on Dating (27:01–28:36)

• Jojo, Mitzi’s original date, complains to Judy that Mitzi now prefers “older men,” having been charmed by Mr. Quigley.
• The episode closes with the group bantering about dating preferences, highlighting the farcical fallout from the day’s events.

---

Memorable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• Mrs. Foster (on the charged gift):
  “You bought a present for your father and you're making him pay for it.” (04:03)

• Mr. Foster (on his ordeal):
  "This is the most horrible day of my life." (09:56)

• Mitzi (on older men):
  “An older man? Oh, how marvelous. I adore men in their 20’s.” (12:52)

• Mr. Foster (voice of defeat):
  “All I can say is I wish I was never born.” (19:26)

• Mr. Foster (final redemption):
  “He gave me the patent. He enjoyed the day! He actually enjoyed the day.” (25:13)

• Mr. Quigley (unexpected romance):
  “Could you give me Mitzi’s telephone number?” (25:45)

---

Important Segments & Timestamps

• 00:49: Episode proper begins, Judy speaking with Harold
• 01:21–05:10: Shopping for Father's gift
• 05:44–06:15: Judy's plan to spend Father's birthday together
• 07:19–08:33: Kids crash Mr. Foster's office, Quigley called at hotel
• 08:51–11:02: Judy convinces Mr. Quigley to cancel the business meeting
• 11:02–18:04: Amusement park chaos: funhouse, tunnel of love
• 19:15–23:16: The swimming misadventures and dance floor disasters
• 23:15–25:59: Sickroom aftermath, patent resolution, and Quigley's romantic interest
• 27:01–28:36: Jojo’s lament about Mitzi and older men

---

Tone and Style

“A Date With Judy” maintains its cheerful, zany, and affectionate tone, full of witty banter, slapstick humor, and classic 1940s family dynamics. The script winks at the audience, making fun of teenage foibles and the generational divides within families, while ultimately affirming family love—even if it’s delivered in the most roundabout (and exhausting) ways possible.

---

Summary

The "Father's Birthday" episode of "A Date with Judy" spins a comic yarn about the limits—and unintended consequences—of good intentions. From mismanaged shopping to a hilariously chaotic “perfect day,” the entire Foster family (with reluctant guest Mr. Quigley in tow) ends up learning that affection, while sometimes misdirected, can heal old wounds and forge surprising new friendships. The laughs are underscored by a sweet message: sometimes what dads want most is simply to be noticed (though perhaps not too much).

---

Transcript

[Mitzi]

Limu Emu.

[Doug Gourley]

And Doug, here we have the Limu Emu in its natural habitat helping people customize their car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual. Fascinating. It's accompanied by his natural ally, Doug.

[Mr. Foster]

Uh, Limu is that guy with the binoculars watching us?

[Doug Gourley]

Cut the camera. They see us. Only pay for what you [e-mail] Liberty.

[Mr. Quigley]

Liberty. Liberty.

[Doug Gourley]

Liberty Savings vary unwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance Company and affiliates. Excludes Massachusetts.

[Narrator]

Night and day, at home or away, always carry Tums T U M S Tums Famous Quick Relief for Acid Indigestion presents A Date with Judy.

[Judy Foster]

Hello.

[Mr. Foster]

Hello, Judy, this is Harold. I just called to tell you that you were the prettiest girl at the party last night.

[Judy Foster]

Why Harold.

[Mr. Foster]

And that white sweater you wore is the prettiest one I've ever seen.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, Harold, aren't you sweet. I got at the Emporium.

[Mrs. Foster]

She.

[Mr. Foster]

Judy, are you doing anything tonight?

[Judy Foster]

Why, not a thing.

[Mr. Foster]

Oh, swell. As long as you're free, would you go down to the Emphorium and get another sweater, only in pink?

[Judy Foster]

Oh, Harold, how darling of you.

[Mr. Foster]

Be sure and get size 44. It's for my mother's birthday.

[Narrator]

Well, that's Judy, folks. Judy Foster, the cutest date in town. Your date with her each Tuesday at this same time as arranged by the makers of Tums Famous Quick Relief for acid indigestion. Well, let's see. Tomorrow is Father Foster's birthday. And that's why we find Judy and her 12 year old brother Randolph at a downtown department store shopping for a perfect gift.

[Randolph Foster]

Judy, you don't think Father would like a baseball bat, do you?

[Judy Foster]

Certainly not. Let's stop fooling Randolph and get Father something he needs.

[Randolph Foster]

Here's a baseball glove. Don't you think, Father? Go for that.

[Judy Foster]

Randolph, we only have $2 and we're going to use it to buy Father something he wants.

[Randolph Foster]

Well, do you think he'd like a canoe?

[Judy Foster]

Father wouldn't know what to do with a canoe.

[Randolph Foster]

I don't know. He does all right with a paddle.

[Judy Foster]

Well, let's get out of this sports department. And try to remember Father is not a sport.

[Randolph Foster]

They got Jim Chem Chem chemistry sets for two bucks in the toy department.

[Judy Foster]

What do you want Father to do, blow himself up?

[Randolph Foster]

Hey, where are you going now?

[Judy Foster]

Oh, there's just something over here I want to look at.

[Randolph Foster]

Judy, we haven't got much time.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, Randolph, isn't this gorgeous?

[Randolph Foster]

I don't think Father would look well in a necklace.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, Randolph, these earrings are divine.

[Randolph Foster]

You think Father really needs earrings?

[Judy Foster]

No, but I wish he did.

[Randolph Foster]

Well, I'm sure he'd get a lot more wear out of this diamond tiara.

[Judy Foster]

Look, my birthday isn't so far off, so if we bought Father a present for me, then he'd have it to give to me.

[Randolph Foster]

Well, in that case, let's get him a chemistry set, a baseball glove, a bicycle and a Boy Scout knife. It'll relieve Father birthday worries as far as I'm concerned.

[Judy Foster]

For five years. Oh, be quiet, Randolph. Come on, let's shop further.

[Randolph Foster]

Okey dokey. Hey, Judy, what are you going over.

[Mrs. Foster]

To that counter for?

[Randolph Foster]

Father doesn't wear black nightgowns.

[Mrs. Foster]

Well, hello, children.

[Judy Foster]

Hi, Mother.

[Mrs. Foster]

Only took long enough on your shopping trip. Did you get your father a birthday present?

[Judy Foster]

Yes, Mother, we did.

[Randolph Foster]

We almost got lost in the wilds of the laundry department, but we managed to hack our way out.

[Judy Foster]

Why, Randolph, how can you say that? We just took sort of a quick swing through that department.

[Mrs. Foster]

What'd you get, Father? Something useful, I hope.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, yes, Mother, something very useful.

[Mrs. Foster]

What?

[Judy Foster]

Judy, I don't think we ought to tell you because we want it to be a surprise for Father.

[Mrs. Foster]

Why won't you help?

[Randolph Foster]

We got him a smoking jacket.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, Randolph, what did you tell for? You know how friendly Mother is with Father.

[Mrs. Foster]

A smoking jacket? But your father doesn't smoke.

[Randolph Foster]

When he has this jacket, he will.

[Mrs. Foster]

You mean you got a smoking jacket for $2?

[Judy Foster]

Oh, no, Mother. We couldn't get Father anything cheap. This was $18.

[Mrs. Foster]

$18? Well, where did you get $18? Oh, we charged it. You charged it? You bought a present for your father and you're making him pay for it.

[Judy Foster]

Shouldn't we have done it? Father pays for everything else. He's all.

[Mrs. Foster]

That's just it. He pays for everything all year round. For me, for you and for Randolph. And on his birthday, he has to pay for his own birthday present. Well, I think it's a shame.

[Judy Foster]

I guess we shouldn't have charged it.

[Mrs. Foster]

Well, you certainly shouldn't have. Why, I was so proud of you, having saved up $2 to spend on Father. And now, incidentally, what happened to the $2?

[Judy Foster]

Oh, the $2. Well, Randolph bought himself a baseball glove for 79 cents.

[Randolph Foster]

Well, Judy bought herself a snooze.

[Judy Foster]

Well, it was just the color of my chartreuse dress. I might never have found as perfect a match again, Mother. I might have looked a thousand years and not have found another like it. It was an absolute necessity. And it was only 85 cents.

[Mrs. Foster]

That still doesn't count up to $2.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, well, when we finished, we were so exhausted from shopping that we had to buy Shock for Sundays.

[Randolph Foster]

Another necessity, Mother.

[Mrs. Foster]

Yes, I see. Well, Father is not going to pay for his own birthday present.

[Judy Foster]

He isn't?

[Mrs. Foster]

No, Judy, he isn't. I'm going to call up the department store and cancel that smoking jacket right now.

[Randolph Foster]

The baseball glove can't be canceled. We bought it outright.

[Mrs. Foster]

Now, listen to me, children. Your father works hard and then he has a birthday. And what do his children do? They buy themselves chartreuse snoods and baseball gloves.

[Randolph Foster]

Only one baseball glove, Mother.

[Mrs. Foster]

Oh, poor Father. No one ever thinks of him. All he ever thinks of is us. But we. We just neglect him.

[Judy Foster]

He is neglected, isn't he?

[Mrs. Foster]

He certainly is, Judy.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, Mother, I'm terribly sorry. I feel awful. Poor Father. We hardly pay any attention to him.

[Randolph Foster]

I could take the baseball glove back.

[Judy Foster]

I know what would be nicer than anything.

[Randolph Foster]

What?

[Judy Foster]

If we spend the entire day with Father on his birthday.

[Mrs. Foster]

Well.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, Mother, it's a perfectly lovely idea.

[Mrs. Foster]

But, Judy, I. Why, of course.

[Judy Foster]

That's what we'll do, Randolph. For at least one day in his life, poor Father will know he's loved and appreciated.

[Randolph Foster]

Sounds mighty ghoulish to me.

[Judy Foster]

It's perfectly beautiful. Father will have one perfect day. We'll go down to his office and surprise him early in the morning and just make Father happy all day long.

[Narrator]

In just a minute, we'll hear what happens to poor Father in the meantime. Are you one of those eat it and beat it persons you are. Then you've learned that fast eating and acid indigestion often go together. Now, why not learn how quickly Tums bring relief from upset acid stomach? Yes. Tums soothe acid indigestion in record time. Heartburn and that oppressive full feeling quickly vanish. Join the thousands of other Americans who, night and day, at home or away, always carry Tums. Only 10 cents a roll. All drugstores 3 roll package for a quarter. But be sure you get TUMS for the tummy. There are many imitations of Tums, but no substitute for them. And now back to A Date with Judy. Well, Judy and Randolph have decided to give Father a big break on his birthday. They're going to devote the whole day to him doing nothing but just making him happy. And now we pick up the kids as they enter his office. Poor Father.

[Judy Foster]

Happy birthday, Father.

[Randolph Foster]

Happy birthday, Father.

[Mr. Foster]

Oh, thanks. Now, would you mind scramming?

[Judy Foster]

For you, Father, Randolph and I are going to devote the whole day to you. You'll have to leave the office right now and come with us.

[Mr. Foster]

I'm sure that'd be very pleasant here, but I have an 11 o' clock appointment.

[Judy Foster]

But Father, all the arrangements are made. You simply got to leave.

[Mr. Foster]

Look, Judy, a man has come to town, a very important man from whom I expect to get a very big favor. See, I've been using a patent for years and now he says he has a claim. If he slaps an injunction on me.

[Judy Foster]

Father, we're gonna spend the whole day making you happy.

[Mr. Foster]

I don't want to be happy. I just want my rights to this patent. This is the most important piece of business I ever had.

[Mrs. Foster]

Do you know what?

[Judy Foster]

This man is gonna be here at.

[Mr. Foster]

11 o', clock, Mr. Quigley. AQ Quigley. Stopping at the Carter Hotel just across the street. And he'll be here in a minute. So would you mind getting out of here and leaving me alone?

[Judy Foster]

I don't know how you can think of business on your birthday.

[Mr. Foster]

Judy, when you get to my age, you'll think of business on your birthday. Now look, you two run along, will you? If you really want to help me out, beat it.

[Randolph Foster]

Oh, Father, this is what's called a paternal brush off. Goodbye, Father.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, Randolph, what are we gonna do? And after all the wonderful plans we've made.

[Randolph Foster]

Well, I guess Father's been neglected so long he likes it.

[Judy Foster]

Randolph, we simply must rescue Father from himself. Come on.

[Randolph Foster]

Where are you going now?

[Judy Foster]

To the Carter hotel. We see Mr. Quigley and explain the whole situation. After all, it is Father's birthday and we must do everything to make him happy.

[Randolph Foster]

Yeah, even if it kills him.

[Judy Foster]

It's very important, Mr. Quigley.

[Mrs. Foster]

Very.

[Judy Foster]

The situation is that it's Father's birthday and we planned this perfect day of happiness for him.

[Mr. Quigley]

Mm, mm, I see.

[Judy Foster]

We know business is your primary interest and all that, but you wouldn't want to interfere with filial affection, would you?

[Mr. Quigley]

Decidedly not. Personally, I know nothing of filial affection, but I decidedly wouldn't interfere with it.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, thank you, Mr. Quigley. I think you're wonderful.

[Mr. Quigley]

Not at all. I'll call your father now and cancel our appointment.

[Judy Foster]

You will? Oh, that's wonderful, Mr. Quigley. You don't know what this day of happiness is going to mean to Father.

[Mr. Foster]

Hello. Oh. Oh, hello, Miss Quigley. Well, Mr. Quigley. I see Mr. Quigley.

[Mrs. Foster]

But couldn't you.

[Mr. Foster]

Well, when could you. I see Mr. Quigley. Goodbye, Mr. Quigley. Oh, I'm sick. Come in.

[Judy Foster]

Hello, Father.

[Randolph Foster]

Hello, Father.

[Mr. Foster]

Oh, you two again. What do you want now, we thought.

[Judy Foster]

We'D try once again to give you a happy birthday.

[Mr. Foster]

Happy birthday. This is the most horrible day of my life. Mr. Quigley just phoned me. He isn't keeping his appointment and he doesn't know when he'll give me another.

[Judy Foster]

Is that so, Father?

[Mr. Foster]

Yes, that's so. It might be months or years before I have another chance like this. By that time I'll be bankrupt.

[Judy Foster]

Father, we planned a whole day of positive happiness for you. So all you have to do is come with us. And you will, won't you?

[Mr. Foster]

Look, Judy, I. Oh, well, why not? What have I got to lose? Lead on.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, Father, I think that's just scratch. Scrumptious. Now remember, Father, this is absolutely your day. So we want you to do everything you most like to do. What would you like to do most?

[Mr. Foster]

Spend the day quietly under a nice shady tree. And so here we are at a nice quiet amusement park.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, but Father, this was all pre arranged. After we're through here, we can do something you'd like to do.

[Mitzi]

But.

[Judy Foster]

But you see, Father, this had been planned beforehand. I wonder where the gang is.

[Mr. Foster]

The gang?

[Judy Foster]

Yes, Father.

[Mr. Foster]

Your gang?

[Judy Foster]

Yes, Father. Oh, there they are in front of the funhouse. Come on.

[Mr. Foster]

Just what I love most, your gang. I don't get enough of it at home. Every night I have to have it on my birthday too.

[Randolph Foster]

I see everybody else, but I don't see Mr. Quigley.

[Mr. Foster]

Quigley? What's Quigley got to do with it?

[Judy Foster]

Oh, we invited him to come along.

[Mr. Foster]

You what?

[Judy Foster]

Why, yes, Father. We thought it'd be nice if you had a pal about your own age.

[Mr. Quigley]

A pal?

[Mr. Foster]

That tight faced conservative? Oh, you'll scare the tar out of him.

[Mitzi]

We just did it for you, to make you happy.

[Mr. Foster]

Happy? I was never lower in my whole life.

[Mr. Quigley]

I can't believe it.

[Mr. Foster]

You asked Quigley to come to this. This den of horrors.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, Father, he'll enjoy it as much as you will.

[Mr. Foster]

That's what I'm afraid of. A Q. Quigley.

[Mrs. Foster]

Good Lord.

[Mr. Foster]

A staid, blue nosed old bachelor. Your crowd will kill him.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, is he a bachelor?

[Mr. Foster]

Yes, he is. Oh, Judy, why do you do things like this to me?

[Judy Foster]

Oh, well, if he's a bachelor, I'll have to fix him up with a girl. I wonder if Mitzi's his time fixed.

[Mr. Foster]

Quickly up with a. Oh, no, no, not perhaps.

[Judy Foster]

Well, you want him to have fun, don't you?

[Mitzi]

Oh, hi gang. Hi, everybody. Happy birthday for your father, Judy. Thank you, Mitzi.

[Judy Foster]

Excuse me a minute. Come here, Jojo.

[Jojo]

What do you want, Judy?

[Judy Foster]

Well, something's happened that calls for a tremendous sacrifice on your part. Would you mind giving up Mitzi?

[Jojo]

Giving up Mitzi?

[Judy Foster]

Uh huh. Only temporarily. My father's pal is meeting us here as a bachelor. And since it's father's birthday. Well, you wouldn't want my father's pal not to have a date today, would you?

[Jojo]

Well, no, but.

[Judy Foster]

Well, I thought Mitzi would be a good type for Mr. Quigley. So would you mind terribly if you went staying?

[Jojo]

Well, gee, I don't know. Maybe Mitzi isn't willing to sacrifice me.

[Mitzi]

Mitzi, come on over here a second.

[Judy Foster]

Yeah. Judy, Mitzi, Jojo's willing to release you for the day because I have another date for you.

[Mitzi]

You have?

[Judy Foster]

He's an older man.

[Mitzi]

An older man? Oh, how marvelous. I adore men in their 20s.

[Judy Foster]

Well, he's not exactly in his 20s.

[Mitzi]

Oh, well, suppose he's 19 even. That's okay.

[Judy Foster]

Well, he's not exactly 19 either.

[Mitzi]

Oh gosh, that's getting right back to Jojo.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, he's older than Jojo and he's very rich. A millionaire. Oh boy, maybe even a multi millionaire. And I give you my word of honor, he's an older man. Much older.

[Mitzi]

It's a deal, Judy.

[Judy Foster]

Well.

[Randolph Foster]

Hey, Judy, come on out of your huddle. Mr. Quigley's here.

[Mr. Foster]

Mr. Quigley, let me explain. This is all a mister.

[Judy Foster]

It's all fixed, Father. I mean about Mr. Quigley's day.

[Mr. Foster]

Oh, Judy, for the love of heaven.

[Mr. Quigley]

How are you, Miss Foster?

[Judy Foster]

I'm fine. Oh, Mr. Quigley, here's your date. Mr. Quigley. Miss Mary.

[Mr. Quigley]

How do you do?

[Judy Foster]

Is this Mr. Quigley? Why, yes, Mitzi. I think I'll go Back to JoJo.

[Mr. Foster]

Mr. Quigley, really, I didn't know this was going to happen.

[Judy Foster]

I like older men, Judy. But Jeep, not that old. Oh, how can you say that? How old are you, Mr. Quigley?

[Mr. Quigley]

Why, I'm 45.

[Judy Foster]

You see, Platt's not so old. He's got most of his hair. Turn around, Mr. Quigley.

[Mitzi]

You need see.

[Judy Foster]

And the back is pretty well covered. Yeah, that's what I'd call a fringe. Don't be silly, Mitzi. I bet if Mr. Quigley had on a toupee, he'd be almost stunning.

[Mr. Foster]

Can I get you something? A Q? I'm dreadfully sorry.

[Mr. Quigley]

No, no, no, no, no, nothing at all.

[Randolph Foster]

Can I get you something, Father? You look like you need it.

[Mr. Foster]

No, Randolph, they wouldn't sell it to you.

[Mitzi]

Well, okay, Judy, okay.

[Randolph Foster]

I'll do it for you.

[Judy Foster]

I'll be his girlfriend.

[Randolph Foster]

But just for today.

[Judy Foster]

On account it's your father's birthday.

[Mr. Foster]

Don't do me any favors.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, gee, thank you, Mitzi.

[Mitzi]

Come on, Quiggly Wiggly. Now, let's see. What would you rather do first? Uh, go into the funhouse or into.

[Judy Foster]

The tunnel of Love?

[Mr. Foster]

Oh, this is horrible.

[Randolph Foster]

Come on, everybody, let's go to the funhouse.

[Jojo]

Wait a minute, gang. Let him have it.

[Randolph Foster]

Nice and loud. Now, all together.

[Mitzi]

Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you.

[Mr. Foster]

A Q? A Q? Let me explain. This is all a mistake.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, Father, I'm so glad you're enjoying your birthday so much.

[Mr. Foster]

I'm enjoying a merry chase, that's what. Every time I open my mouth to talk to Quigley, a rolling barrel upsets him or he shoots down a slide.

[Mitzi]

Oh, but it's fun, isn't it, Father?

[Mr. Foster]

Yes, Judy, it's fun. The kind to have in insane asylums.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, Father, watch out.

[Mitzi]

Isn't that a trapdoor in front of you?

[Mr. Foster]

Trapdoor is nothing of the kind. I know a trapdoor when I see one.

[Randolph Foster]

Wrong again.

[Mr. Foster]

Judy. What is this hole in the wall called?

[Judy Foster]

Father, how unromantic of you. This is the tunnel of love.

[Mr. Foster]

I can hardly see. I wonder where Quigley and that Magpie are. I don't know how Quigley's gonna hold up under this. Normally he looks like he was ready to cave in. If he's 45, I'm 16.

[Judy Foster]

Father, he admits you're sitting in the seat in front of us.

[Mr. Foster]

In the seat? Quigley, is that you?

[Mr. Quigley]

Yes, it is.

[Mrs. Foster]

I am.

[Randolph Foster]

Oh.

[Mr. Foster]

Oh, it is, isn't it? Well, I was just thinking how nice it is you being near me, where I can get a chance to talk to you, explain this mess.

[Mitzi]

Can I tell you something, Mr. Quigley?

[Mr. Quigley]

You may tell me something, Ms. Mitzi.

[Mitzi]

Well, usually when we get into the tunnel of Love, we pitch woo.

[Mr. Quigley]

Pitch woo?

[Mitzi]

Yeah, you know, hold hands.

[Judy Foster]

In your day, Mr. Quigley, it was probably called bundling.

[Mr. Quigley]

That was a little before my day.

[Judy Foster]

You see, Mitzi, he's not so old.

[Mr. Quigley]

Ms. Mitzi, shall I be required to pitch woo?

[Judy Foster]

Well, of course, that's entirely up to you, Quigley.

[Mitzi]

But you just do what you like.

[Judy Foster]

Father, and I won't watch. If you don't want us to, will be, Father.

[Mr. Foster]

No, no, not if they don't want us to.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, it's so wonderful to celebrate your birthday with you, Father. I never knew how much fun it was to just give of yourself for somebody else's happiness.

[Randolph Foster]

I love it.

[Judy Foster]

Just giving and giving.

[Mr. Foster]

If you really want to give. For the love of heaven, give me a chance to talk to Quigley alone. Mitzi, would you mind changing seats with me? I. I want to discuss a new type of canning process of. Mr. Quigley.

[Mitzi]

Change seats? Why, that'd be terrible.

[Mr. Foster]

It was.

[Mitzi]

Why, of course. For gosh sakes, what would everybody think if they saw us coming out of.

[Judy Foster]

The tunnel of love?

[Mitzi]

Me sitting with Judy and Mr. Foster.

[Judy Foster]

Holding hands with Mr. Quigley.

[Narrator]

We'll return to Judy in just a moment. In the meantime, I have an important announcement from Tums. Friends, you don't have to put up with upset stomach caused by acid indigestion anymore. Sure, certain foods, especially if you eat too much, may upset you. But Tums spelled T u m S is the answer to that. At the first heartburn, warning of acid indigestion, slip one or two Tums on your tongue, same as you would candy mints and forget the whole thing. Your stomach and your world are both sweet again. Best of all, you can trust Tums never to over alkalize your stomach. Because Tums are different. Tums contain no soda or other water soluble alkalis. Therefore, Tums never let you in for an acid rebound. So be wise. Night and day, at home or away, always carry Tums. 10 cents a roll, 3 roll, package for a quarter, Tums for the tummy. T U M S. And now back to a date with Judy. Well, Judy's gang is celebrating Father's birthday. They have Father and an important business associate, Mr. Quigley, out at the amusement park. And are those gentlemen getting the works?

[Mr. Foster]

Listen, Judy, what are we gonna do now?

[Judy Foster]

Eat our picnic lunch? Of course, Father. And then we're going swimming. Oh, isn't it lovely? And to think it's all for your birthday, Father.

[Mr. Foster]

All I can say is I wish I was never born.

[Judy Foster]

Now, Father, you know you're having a wonderful time.

[Mr. Foster]

So laugh now when I'll have all the rest of my life to laugh in a maniacal sort of way in a padded cell.

[Randolph Foster]

Hey, come and look at Mr. Quigley.

[Mr. Foster]

What's wrong with Mr. Quigley?

[Randolph Foster]

Well, nothing's wrong with him. He fell off the pier into the water.

[Mr. Foster]

Oh, good heaven.

[Randolph Foster]

Oh, he. He's all right now. They pulled him out, of course. He's kind of puffing like an old dinosaur.

[Judy Foster]

But I.

[Mr. Foster]

20 years I've been trying to build up a good, respectable business and in one fell swoop I'm ruined.

[Randolph Foster]

Oh, don't worry, Father. If necessary, I can become A professional baseball player and support the family. I got a glove.

[Mr. Foster]

Now, when we get home tonight, you better plan on wearing it someplace else besides your hand.

[Mitzi]

Here we are, everybody. Help yourself to lunch from the bathroom.

[Mr. Foster]

Oh, Mr. Mr. Quigley. Say, Mr. Quigley, are you all right?

[Mitzi]

Mr. Foster, please don't disturb us. We're having lunchy wunchie, aren't we, Quigley Wiggly.

[Mr. Quigley]

Quite so, quite so.

[Mr. Foster]

But after Quigley wig. I mean, Mr. Quigley's fall from the.

[Judy Foster]

Pier, perfectly all right.

[Mitzi]

He a little wet. But after he eats his lunch, he's.

[Mr. Quigley]

Going to get in a bathing suit.

[Judy Foster]

Anyway, so what's the diff?

[Mr. Quigley]

He might catch cold.

[Mitzi]

Oh, that's silly. Come on now, Quigley Wiggly. Open your mouth. That's it. Now, I'll just poke in a spoon of ice cream. There we are.

[Judy Foster]

How about a pickle?

[Mr. Foster]

Oh, for the love of heaven.

[Mrs. Foster]

I'm.

[Mr. Quigley]

I. I'm all right, Foster, but I.

[Mr. Foster]

Mean to say A.

[Mitzi]

Please, Mr. Foster. Quigg is my date. Now, open wide. Okay, everybody, get into your suits. We're going swimming.

[Mr. Foster]

Swimming? Right after lunch? Are you crazy, Judy?

[Judy Foster]

Oh, Father, we're right here on the lake. We might as well use it. Here's a suit for you, Father. Go in the bathhouse and put it on.

[Mr. Foster]

I refuse to go swimming.

[Judy Foster]

But, Father, you can't refuse, not after all the trouble. Jojo went to get a suit for you. He had to borrow one from his little brother.

[Mr. Foster]

From his little brother?

[Judy Foster]

It might be tied on account of Jojo's little brother only being 10 years.

[Mitzi]

Old, but he's big for his age.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, come on, Father. Nearly everyone's ready to go in.

[Mitzi]

There goes Mr. Quigley.

[Mrs. Foster]

Mr. Quigley.

[Mr. Foster]

Well, he's got his clothes on.

[Mitzi]

Well, he isn't going to bother changing. He's all wet. Anyhow.

[Mrs. Foster]

I'll never get that patent.

[Mr. Foster]

I might as well close up my factory and go to the poor house right now.

[Jojo]

Last one in's a stinker.

[Mitzi]

Okay. Not me.

[Randolph Foster]

Yes, sir. Father's having a perfect day.

[Mitzi]

Oh, my God.

[Mr. Foster]

Oh. Oh, do I have a stomach ache.

[Judy Foster]

Come on, Father. We're going to the dance pavilion.

[Mr. Foster]

Dance? But you mean to dance?

[Judy Foster]

Oh, you won't have to jitterbug. I'll dance with you any way you want to.

[Mr. Foster]

I don't want to do it anyway. I just want to stay here and hold my poor, unhappy stomach.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, everybody's dancing.

[Mitzi]

Just do it the way you used.

[Judy Foster]

To in the gay 90s, Father.

[Randolph Foster]

You might even try trotting out a minuet.

[Mr. Foster]

They call that music, Mr. Quigley.

[Mr. Quigley]

AQ are you referring to me? Foster, look.

[Mr. Foster]

A Q. When they're not looking, we can sneak out the side door.

[Mitzi]

Hey, come on, Quiggly Wiggly, let's stay.

[Mr. Quigley]

I shall try to oblige you, Ms. Mitzi.

[Mitzi]

Can you get a bug?

[Mr. Foster]

Get a bob. Oh, now, Missy, please, please don't do.

[Mitzi]

That to him, Mr. Fluster. I took him on for today and I'm going to do my duty. I'm going to see that he has a good time. Come on, Quig. Hey, that's it, Quig. That's good.

[Mr. Quigley]

Am I manipulating properly, Ms. Mitzi?

[Mitzi]

Not bad, Quig. Only don't pop my arm.

[Mr. Quigley]

Just jerk it like this.

[Mitzi]

Hey, now you're getting in the groove. Come on. A worm, A squirm, A Rocky tuck.

[Mr. Foster]

Oh.

[Mrs. Foster]

Oh. Here, Melvin, put this hot water bottle on your tummy. Would you like the ice bag on your head?

[Mr. Foster]

Everything hurts. My legs from walking around. My head spinning in a million different directions. I've never had such an awful day in my life.

[Judy Foster]

We were only trying to celebrate your birthday.

[Mr. Foster]

Yeah, you celebrated it all right. Another hour of that and it would have been my last birthday ever.

[Mrs. Foster]

Oh, Melzie.

[Mr. Foster]

Now, listen to me, all of you. This is my last wish. My birthday is hereafter struck out of the calendar completely. Oh, Father Quigley will fight me tooth and nail on that patent after this.

[Judy Foster]

But, Father, all we did was for you.

[Mrs. Foster]

Oh, don't think I don't appreciate it.

[Mr. Foster]

You devoted a whole day to me giving up your time, not doing the things you usually do, spending all that money. Incidentally, who footed the bill?

[Randolph Foster]

Mr. Quigley.

[Mr. Foster]

What?

[Mitzi]

He insisted.

[Mr. Foster]

Oh, if I ever get up from this deathbed, I'll.

[Mrs. Foster]

Ooh.

[Mr. Foster]

Oh, my stomach. Oh, poor Quigley. Who's taking care of him? Who's putting hot water bottles on his stomach?

[Mitzi]

No, no, no, no.

[Randolph Foster]

That wasn't your stomach, Father. That was a telephone.

[Judy Foster]

I'll give it.

[Mitzi]

Never mind. I'll answer.

[Judy Foster]

Hello?

[Mrs. Foster]

Oh, yes, Melvin. It's Mr. Quigley.

[Mr. Foster]

Quigley, what am I going to say to the man? Here, Judy, you hold this ice bag. Randolph, you hold this hot water bottle. Hello?

[Mr. Quigley]

Hello there, Foster.

[Mr. Foster]

Oh, Mr. Quigley. I want to explain about today. I feel just the way you do about it.

[Mr. Quigley]

Well, you know, I didn't know you.

[Mrs. Foster]

Had it in you.

[Mr. Quigley]

I thought it was wonderful, too. Just wonderful.

[Mr. Foster]

You, huh?

[Mr. Quigley]

It was a fine day.

[Mr. Foster]

Thanks very much.

[Mr. Quigley]

Now, Foster. Foster, about that pattern.

[Mr. Foster]

Yeah?

[Mr. Quigley]

You can have it.

[Mrs. Foster]

I can what?

[Mr. Quigley]

It's yours. Well, see you in the Morning.

[Mr. Foster]

Yeah.

[Mr. Quigley]

You don't sound so good. You can't take it, can you?

[Mr. Foster]

No, no, I.

[Mr. Quigley]

Well, try to get back in shape. I feel great.

[Judy Foster]

Why?

[Mr. Foster]

Well, I never.

[Mrs. Foster]

What happened? Melvin.

[Mr. Foster]

He gave me the patent. He enjoyed the day. He actually enjoyed the day.

[Randolph Foster]

Here's your hot water bottle, Father.

[Mr. Foster]

I don't need it. All of a sudden, I feel great. I wonder who that can be.

[Mrs. Foster]

I'll get it. Hello? Just a minute. It's Mr. Quigley again.

[Mr. Foster]

I knew it couldn't be true. I knew it. Give me back my hot water bottle.

[Mrs. Foster]

I wonder what he wants now.

[Mr. Foster]

Let me have that phone.

[Mitzi]

But he doesn't want to talk to you.

[Mrs. Foster]

He wants to talk to Judy.

[Mr. Foster]

To Judy?

[Judy Foster]

I'll take it. Hello, quiggly wiggly.

[Mr. Quigley]

Hello, Mrs. I just called back to ask you a favor.

[Judy Foster]

Yes, Mr. Quickley?

[Mr. Quigley]

Could you give me Mitzy Telly's phone number?

[Mitzi]

Father, he wants Mitzi's telephone number.

[Mr. Foster]

What?

[Judy Foster]

He must be crazy about her.

[Mr. Foster]

And I said he might as well buy himself a toupee while he's at it.

[Mitzi]

Mr. Priggly, Potter says to tell you the.

[Judy Foster]

Judy.

[Narrator]

We'll return to Judy in just a moment. But first, we all know that eating before going to bed is fun. But even a little bite before retiring can take a big bite out of your night's sleep. For remember, the better the food or drink, the more you may need Tums. One of the most common causes of sleepless nights is an upset acid stomach. There's no sense in lying awake counting sheep when one or two Tums dissolved in your tongue might relieve the whole trouble and help you to sleep in peace. It's simply wonderful the way Tums bring fast relief from acid indigestion. So keep a roll of Tums tucked under your pillow. Do what thousands do night and day, at home or away. Always keep Tums handy. 10 cents a roll, all drugstores. Three roll. Package for a quarter. Tums for the tummy. T U M S. Now back to the Fosters.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, gee, I hope that's a date.

[Randolph Foster]

There ought to be a way you could tell us a date. By the way the phone rings, I.

[Judy Foster]

Hope it's somebody new. Somebody I could get a violent fever for.

[Randolph Foster]

You know, I could make a fortune with an invention like that.

[Mitzi]

Hello?

[Jojo]

Hello, Judy.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, hello, Jojo.

[Jojo]

Listen, Judy, I'm pretty upset.

[Mrs. Foster]

Why, Jojo?

[Jojo]

Well, I didn't mind lending Mitzi to Mr. Quigley for one afternoon, but that's as far as I want to go.

[Mitzi]

Why?

[Mrs. Foster]

What's wrong?

[Jojo]

There I was Trying to be a good guy, doing you a favor. And now what happens?

[Judy Foster]

All right. Well, what happened?

[Jojo]

Now I can't get a date with Mitzi at all.

[Mitzi]

You can't?

[Judy Foster]

No.

[Jojo]

She doesn't want to date anybody but older men.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, gee, that's a shame, Joseph.

[Jojo]

I say it's a shame, and it's all your fault. When I loaned Mitzi to Mr. Quigley, I lost her forever.

[Judy Foster]

Oh, how gruesome.

[Jojo]

Older men. Older men all the time.

[Mrs. Foster]

Why?

[Jojo]

Do you know last night she went out with a guy 21 years old.

[Mitzi]

She did?

[Mrs. Foster]

What does she want to do?

[Mitzi]

The house?

[Jojo]

Don't ask me. She doesn't like anybody anymore unless he's got one foot in the grave.

[Judy Foster]

It's awfully morbid. Isn't it awful.

[Jojo]

Judy, how do you feel about younger men?

[Judy Foster]

I feel fine about them. Why?

[Jojo]

Gee, I wish I could get Mitzi to feel that way.

[Judy Foster]

You do?

[Randolph Foster]

Yeah.

[Jojo]

Judy, I know just the way to do it.

[Judy Foster]

How?

[Jojo]

You have a little brother named Randolph, don't you? Uh, I was wondering, if I loaned Mitzi to Randolph a couple of hours, do you think she'd get interested in younger men again?

[Narrator]

A Date with Judy is written by Alene Leslie and stars Louise Erickson and Dick Davis. Original music was composed and played by Charles Cornell. The program was produced and directed by Helen Ma. This is Doug Gourley inviting you to be with us again next Tuesday at this same time to keep your date with Judy and remember, night and day, at home or away, always carry tums T U M S.

[Mr. Foster]

This is the National Broadcasting Company.