Aldrich Family - The Antique Chairs

Summary

Podcast Summary: Harold's Old Time Radio

Episode: Aldrich Family - The Antique Chairs
Date: March 10, 2026
Host: Harold's Old Time Radio
Original Airdate (Program): Golden Age of Radio
Main Theme: Classic comedic misunderstandings around a set of "antique" chairs newly acquired by the Aldrich family lead to family chaos, business lessons, and heartfelt moments.

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Episode Overview

This episode brings listeners back to the golden age of radio with a broadcast of "The Aldrich Family." The play centers on the hilarity that follows when Alice Aldrich returns home having purchased a set of supposed antique chairs at an auction. The ensuing confusion and misunderstandings around the value of these chairs spiral into family comedy, notions of business sense, and touching moments of generosity. The story skillfully weaves in themes of familial pride, youthful intentions to help, and gentle ribbing about financial acumen—all wrapped in the period’s signature warm humor.

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Key Discussion Points & Episode Structure

1. Alice’s Big Auction Find

• [03:01-05:24]
  • Alice Aldrich returns excited from an auction, revealing to her skeptical husband, Sam, that she’s bought what she believes to be genuine early American antique chairs.
  • Sam is concerned:

    “We already have a set of dining room chairs.” — Sam Aldrich [05:07]

  • Alice insists the chairs are an investment, certain of their high future value.

2. Rumors & Small Town Gossip

• [04:54-06:12]
  • Henry Aldrich and his friend Homer Brown overhear rumors that the Brown family may have inherited a fortune.
  • Henry’s excitement highlights the small-town penchant for gossip and exaggeration.

3. The Truth About the Chairs

• [06:20-07:42]
  • Sam learns from Will Brown that the very chairs Alice bought were unloaded by the Browns at the auction, believing them to be worthless.
  • Notable scene:

    “Five old chairs, Sam, that we got stung on 15 years ago... The ugliest things you ever saw.” — Will Brown [07:13]

  • Realization dawns on Sam, and his appetite vanishes; he asks Alice to get rid of the chairs.

4. Miscommunications & Financial Fears

• [08:05-11:14]
  • Henry and Homer become convinced Henry’s family is facing financial ruin, leading to comic scenes:
    • Sam and Alice hiding the truth about the chairs
    • Henry interpreting parental secrecy as dire financial straits

5. The Scheme to Help the Parents

• [11:40-14:22]
  • Henry and Homer decide to raise money by selling secondhand items (and even consider auctioning Homer’s bed!).
  • Homer's rationale:

    “After all they’ve done for me, the least I can do in return is sleep on the floor.” — Homer Brown [14:17]

6. Rescuing the Missing Chair

• [12:14-12:57]
  • Alice tries to sell the chairs and learns that a sixth chair would have made the set (and her windfall) considerably more valuable.
  • She recalls that the missing chair is with the Browns.

7. Comedic Negotiation for the Chair Parts

• [18:03-19:53]
  • Sam awkwardly attempts to buy back the stool (once part of the chair set, now Homer's shoe-shine stool and Will Brown’s pipe rack).
  • Will Brown, bemused, gives Sam a pipe but wants $10 for the “pipe rack.”

8. Auction Antics

• [20:15-22:12]
  • At the auction, Homer tries to sell his stool but accidentally bids against himself.
  • Sam swoops in and wins it for $10, reuniting the essential chair piece needed for the set’s resale.

9. Gus the Multi-Talented Apprentice

• [22:29-24:06]
  • Sam visits the cabinet maker’s to repair the chair, running into Gus, a character with a colorful background, leading to a slapstick conversation.

10. Counting (and Subtracting) Profits

• [24:08-25:39]
  • Alice excitedly counts her $65 from the chair sale, believing she’s made a $40 profit until Sam and mounting expenses chip away at the sum.
  • Classic business “math” unfolds:

    “Any business that doesn’t operate in the red is a good business.” — Alice Aldrich [25:32]

11. Heartwarming Resolution

• [25:41-27:01]
  • Henry and Homer, believing the Aldriches are in need, offer to split their $5.12 profit from selling their own “junk.”
  • The gesture deeply moves Alice, who suggests sharing the chair profits with the boys.

12. Closing Humor and Theme

• [27:09-28:19]
  • The episode closes with the boys auctioning off a wallet containing their auction spoils to help Henry’s family and the narrator celebrating their old-fashioned generosity.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On business acumen:

  "And you always said I don't have a good head for business."
  — Alice Aldrich [05:26]

• On the Brown family’s “fortune”:

  "Did you know there's a terrific demand for secondhand furniture and junk? Whatever you can dig up, somebody is darn fool enough to pay money for."
  — Homer Brown [11:46]

• On family support:

  "Now that you've had some hard luck and we've had some good luck, we'd like to give you half of what we've made."
  — Homer Brown [26:02]

• On profit calculations:

  “My goodness. You mean I owe you $20 more simple arithmetic. Very well. Here you are. That still leaves me a $20 profit.”
  — Alice Aldrich [24:54]

• On chivalry and generosity:

  "Why, boys, this is a case of real genuine old fashioned chivalry."
  — Auctioneer [28:15]

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Timestamps of Key Segments

| Segment | Time | |----------------------------------------|----------| | Alice reveals her auction win | 03:01 | | Chairs arrive at the Aldrich home | 04:21 | | Sam learns the truth from Will Brown | 06:20 | | Henry & Homer plot to raise money | 11:40 | | Comedy at the Browns’ home | 13:44 | | Auction scene (stool) | 20:15 | | Sam corners Gus for repairs | 22:29 | | Alice counts her “profits” | 24:08 | | Heartfelt offer from the boys | 25:41 | | Closing moral & comic touch | 27:09 |

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Tone & Style

The episode brims with the brisk, earnest, and slightly slapstick energy characteristic of classic radio comedies. Interactions are warm, sometimes bumbling, and the affectionate ribbing between Alice and Sam paints a lively portrait of a small-town family. The miscommunication-driven plot allows both children and adults to shine—with the Aldrich parents learning lessons in humility and gratitude, while the boys’ innocence and generosity become the emotional high note.

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For New Listeners

If you haven't heard this episode, expect a breezy, charming story with gentle digs at home life, some comic misunderstandings, and a restoration of goodwill among friends and family. The period’s delight in domestic confusion is on full display, rounded off with memorable one-liners and a moral about the heart being more valuable than any "antique."

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Additional Notes

• Advertisements, intermissions, and brand jingles for Jell-O products are interspersed but not summarized here per guideline.
• The original performances by Ezra Stone (Henry) and Jackie Kelk (Homer) lend period-appropriate cheerfulness and comic timing to the show.

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End of Summary

Transcript

[Narrator/Announcer]

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And now the Jello family presents.

[Homer Brown]

Henry.

[Alice Aldrich]

Henry Aldridge.

[Henry Aldrich]

Coming, Mother?

[Narrator/Announcer]

Yes, it's the Aldrich family. Based on characters originated by Clifford Goldsmith and starring Ezra Stone as Henry with

[Sam Aldrich]

Jackie Kalk as Homer.

[Narrator/Announcer]

And yes, it's the Jell O family with its three famous desserts. Jell O in those six delicious flavors. Regular Jell O puddings with that old fashioned homemade flavor. And Jello tapioca puddings. A miracle of goodness, a marvel of speed.

[Henry Aldrich]

Everyone's a Jell O good fellow a very good Jello good fellow so rich, so tempting and mellow.

[Sam Aldrich]

J E L L O and now

[Narrator/Announcer]

for the Aldrich family. The phrase never a dull moment certainly describes a day in the life of a typical teenage American boy like Henry Aldrich. And it more than describes what happens to everyone who comes in. Contact him. The scene opens in the Aldrich front hall. It is late afternoon.

[Homer Brown]

You.

[Alice Aldrich]

Anybody here?

[Sam Aldrich]

Hello, Alice.

[Alice Aldrich]

Sam. What are you doing home?

[Sam Aldrich]

I finished early at the office. Where have you been, Alice?

[Alice Aldrich]

Why, out. Just out.

[Sam Aldrich]

Did you have a good time?

[Alice Aldrich]

Lovely. As soon as I take my hat off, dear, I'll make us a cup of tea.

[Sam Aldrich]

That'll be nice. Was. Was anyone with you?

[Alice Aldrich]

Where, dear?

[Sam Aldrich]

Out.

[Alice Aldrich]

No, no, I was all by myself.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Oh.

[Sam Aldrich]

Not that I care where you went, Alice. Naturally, your time is your own. But you look a little funny.

[Henry Aldrich]

I do?

[Alice Aldrich]

Well, Sam, yes, that is. Did you have an interesting day, dear?

[Sam Aldrich]

Fairly interesting.

[Alice Aldrich]

That's good.

[Sam Aldrich]

Did you?

[Alice Aldrich]

Oh, yes, I had the most. I'll go and make the tea.

[Sam Aldrich]

Alice, where were you?

[Alice Aldrich]

Why, Sam, I wasn't going to tell you just yet, but I'm so excited. I've been to an auction sale.

[Sam Aldrich]

I hope you didn't buy anything.

[Alice Aldrich]

Now, dear, you know perfectly well I bought something.

[Sam Aldrich]

All right, let's have it.

[Alice Aldrich]

Well? Well, they're sort of chairs.

[Sam Aldrich]

What kind of chairs?

[Alice Aldrich]

Why, they're the kind that they'd be just grand in. Well, any place we put them.

[Sam Aldrich]

How many chairs?

[Alice Aldrich]

How many? Sam, they're genuine early American. And it sounded as though they went back to 1840.

[Sam Aldrich]

They went where?

[Alice Aldrich]

And they were awfully cheap, dear. And there's a good deal of wood on them.

[Henry Aldrich]

I know that.

[Sam Aldrich]

I see.

[Alice Aldrich]

But, dear, before you set your heart on them, they may not be chairs.

[Sam Aldrich]

What?

[Alice Aldrich]

Sam, I was way at the back of the hall and there was a woman with a feather right in front of me. So I'm not quite sure what I

[Homer Brown]

bought

[Alice Aldrich]

in the living room.

[Henry Aldrich]

Henry, boy, have you heard about the Browns? Have you heard about the Browns?

[Sam Aldrich]

What browns?

[Henry Aldrich]

The Homer Browns. Gee whiz. Guess what happened to them.

[Homer Brown]

What, Henry? I don't know

[Sam Aldrich]

what.

[Henry Aldrich]

I just ran into Willie Marshall and he said something practically unbelievable happened to them.

[Alice Aldrich]

And he didn't say what it was.

[Henry Aldrich]

He doesn't know either. But, boy, it's all over town, so somebody ought to know. I'm gonna phone Agnes.

[Sam Aldrich]

That's odd. I had lunch with Will Brown today and he didn't mention anything.

[Alice Aldrich]

Whatever's happened to them must have. Oh, my goodness. Is that a truck pulling into our drive?

[Sam Aldrich]

It looks like it.

[Alice Aldrich]

Sam. That must be my chairs.

[Sam Aldrich]

Alice, walk, don't run.

[Alice Aldrich]

Come and see them, dear.

[Auctioneer]

117 Elm Street, Aldrich.

[Alice Aldrich]

That's right. Just set them right down here. Oh, my. Aren't they beautiful?

[Sam Aldrich]

All right, Alice, what are they?

[Alice Aldrich]

Look, Sam, they are chairs. Ladderbacks.

[Sam Aldrich]

Well, here, our ladies.

[Auctioneer]

Sign here.

[Alice Aldrich]

Yes, of course.

[Auctioneer]

Thanks.

[Narrator/Announcer]

So long.

[Alice Aldrich]

Goodbye, and thank you. Sam, look. Five dining room chairs. Genuine antiques. Aren't they beautiful?

[Sam Aldrich]

Grand, Just grand.

[Alice Aldrich]

Oh, I'm so glad you like them, dear.

[Sam Aldrich]

Oh, I do. I do. There's just one small point I'd like to bring up.

[Alice Aldrich]

Yes?

[Sam Aldrich]

We already have a set of dining room chairs.

[Alice Aldrich]

Now, isn't that just like a man?

[Sam Aldrich]

It is, dear.

[Alice Aldrich]

There are all kinds of places we can use them.

[Sam Aldrich]

Such as?

[Alice Aldrich]

Such as? Such as. And besides, Sam, these chairs are really a wonderful investment.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Are they?

[Alice Aldrich]

Of course they are, dear. Antiques always have a high resale value. Didn't you know? And you always said I don't have a good head for business.

[Sam Aldrich]

But, Alice.

[Alice Aldrich]

Come on, dear. Let's go in the living room and take a look around.

[Sam Aldrich]

What for?

[Alice Aldrich]

Maybe there's something we can get rid of to make room for the chairs.

[Sam Aldrich]

Now, Alice, we're not going to start throwing out my favorite furniture.

[Homer Brown]

No kidding, Agnes. Oh, boy.

[Henry Aldrich]

Well, goodbye, Agnes. Gee whiz. The way Agnes understands, it's Homer's uncle who died.

[Alice Aldrich]

Oh, that's too bad.

[Homer Brown]

No, it isn't.

[Henry Aldrich]

He left a will or something. Agnes says she hears the Browns have inherited a couple of fortunes.

[Sam Aldrich]

Henry, Aren't you being rather mercenary?

[Henry Aldrich]

I know, but gee whiz, do you realize what that means?

[Alice Aldrich]

Dear, you're entirely too excited.

[Henry Aldrich]

But, Mother, don't you agree it's pretty wonderful when your best friend suddenly become successful?

[Sam Aldrich]

I'll answer the phone.

[Alice Aldrich]

Henry, I want you to go and comb your hair.

[Henry Aldrich]

Comb my hair? Just when Homer's fallen into some money.

[Sam Aldrich]

Hello?

[Will Brown]

Hello, Sam. This is Will Brown.

[Sam Aldrich]

Will, I just heard the news. Which brother was it?

[Will Brown]

What's that?

[Sam Aldrich]

Or was it your uncle?

[Will Brown]

Whose uncle is this? Sam Aldrich.

[Sam Aldrich]

Will, didn't you just come into some money?

[Will Brown]

Well, yes, but.

[Sam Aldrich]

I want you to know how sorry I am.

[Will Brown]

Sam, what are you talking about? There's nothing new wrong with my brother.

[Sam Aldrich]

Oh, Then what's this story that's going around town?

[Will Brown]

How should I know? You tell me.

[Sam Aldrich]

Never mind.

[Will Brown]

Look, Sam, why don't you and Alice join us for dinner at the Mansion House tonight?

[Sam Aldrich]

The Mansion House?

[Will Brown]

On us, Sam.

[Narrator/Announcer]

On us.

[Sam Aldrich]

That sounds like a good idea.

[Will Brown]

That is, provided I can reserve a table.

[Sam Aldrich]

Well, Alice and I can provide the chairs.

[Will Brown]

It's funny you should mention chairs, Sam. That's where we picked up some money today. Oh, Elizabeth unloaded an old set of chairs on some sucker at an auction sale.

[Sam Aldrich]

Well, now, Will, isn't that. Well, what was that again?

[Will Brown]

Five old chairs, Sam, that we got stung on 15 years ago. And they've been kicking around in our attic ever since.

[Sam Aldrich]

Will.

[Will Brown]

Some fella told us they were genuine antiques.

[Sam Aldrich]

Will, what exactly do these chairs look like?

[Will Brown]

Oh, sort of early American ladder bag

[Sam Aldrich]

jobs with straw seats and knobs all the way up the legs.

[Will Brown]

The ugliest things you ever saw. Yeah, I sure like to see the expression on the face of the poor guy that got him.

[Sam Aldrich]

Well, I don't think we'll be able to make it for dinner tonight after all.

[Will Brown]

No? Why not?

[Sam Aldrich]

Frankly, I suddenly don't have much of an appetite. Henry, never mind making whirlpools with the cream. Just eat your cereal.

[Henry Aldrich]

Sure, Father, I'm eating it. Only, frankly, I'm a little worried about Mother.

[Alice Aldrich]

What about me?

[Henry Aldrich]

Ever since last night, you've been looking kind of sad.

[Alice Aldrich]

Henry, finish your breakfast. You'll be late for school.

[Henry Aldrich]

No, I won't, Mother. There's plenty of time before Homer gets here.

[Sam Aldrich]

Homer's coming over?

[Henry Aldrich]

Sure to call for me, Mother? Look, are you worried about something I've done?

[Alice Aldrich]

Of course not, Henry.

[Sam Aldrich]

Henry, will you run upstairs and get me a handkerchief?

[Henry Aldrich]

Isn't that a handkerchief there in your coat pocket?

[Sam Aldrich]

Please get me another one.

[Henry Aldrich]

You want Two. Handkerchief.

[Sam Aldrich]

I feel a cold coming on, but fine.

[Auctioneer]

Now, please go,

[Homer Brown]

Alice.

[Sam Aldrich]

I don't want Henry to know a thing about it.

[Alice Aldrich]

He doesn't, dear.

[Sam Aldrich]

And I don't want Homer to know about them either. He'll trot straight back to Will with the news.

[Alice Aldrich]

Now, Sam, don't you understand?

[Sam Aldrich]

I'll never be able to look Will Brown in the eye again.

[Alice Aldrich]

Is that why you hid the chairs down in the coal bin?

[Sam Aldrich]

Yes. I want you to get rid of them today. Do you understand?

[Alice Aldrich]

But, Sam, have you looked at it this way? The longer you keep antiques, the more valuable they become.

[Sam Aldrich]

But, Alice, those chairs are not antiques.

[Alice Aldrich]

But, dear, they will be if we keep them long enough.

[Sam Aldrich]

Alice.

[Henry Aldrich]

Here's your handkerchief, Father. And some aspirin.

[Sam Aldrich]

Aspirin? What for?

[Henry Aldrich]

Gee whiz, you're cold. Here, I'll pour you a glass of water.

[Sam Aldrich]

Henry, I don't need any water.

[Henry Aldrich]

You mean you just swallow them straight?

[Homer Brown]

Hey, Henry.

[Henry Aldrich]

I'll be right there, Homer. Goodbye, everybody.

[Sam Aldrich]

Henry, come back here.

[Henry Aldrich]

What is it, Father?

[Will Brown]

Henry.

[Sam Aldrich]

Naturally, if you're walking to school with Homer, you'll be talking to him. Sure. Well, then remember this. If he asks you any questions about the family, you know nothing, absolutely nothing.

[Auctioneer]

About.

[Will Brown]

What?

[Henry Aldrich]

Nothing, Nothing. Father, is something wrong?

[Alice Aldrich]

No, of course not, Henry.

[Sam Aldrich]

But no matter what Homer asks, you, just don't answer him.

[Homer Brown]

Hey, Hen, we're gonna be late for school.

[Henry Aldrich]

I'm coming, Homer. Goodbye, everybody.

[Alice Aldrich]

Don't forget your books.

[Henry Aldrich]

I won't, Mother. Goodbye.

[Homer Brown]

Hi, Hen. Have a gumdrop.

[Henry Aldrich]

Homer, are you asking me? Because if you are, I know nothing.

[Homer Brown]

About what?

[Henry Aldrich]

Never mind. Let's have the gum drop.

[Homer Brown]

Hey, you don't have to take the

[Henry Aldrich]

whole words, but look at the size bag you have.

[Homer Brown]

Boy, that's nothing, Will. See what I've got in my pocket?

[Henry Aldrich]

Yeah.

[Sam Aldrich]

Look.

[Homer Brown]

Licorice, bubblegum, cigars. Cigars across the street.

[Henry Aldrich]

Cigars?

[Homer Brown]

Sure, they're solid chocolate.

[Henry Aldrich]

Boy, what happened? I thought my father said your uncle didn't die after all.

[Homer Brown]

He didn't, but we had a windfall just the same. This morning my father called me in and said, homer, how about stepping up your allowance this week?

[Henry Aldrich]

He did?

[Homer Brown]

I'll say. And listen, why don't you ask your father to do the same thing?

[Henry Aldrich]

Now, wait, Homer. What are you trying to pump me about?

[Homer Brown]

Pump you? How?

[Henry Aldrich]

I've noticed. I've noticed. All you've done is ask me questions. Why doesn't my father increase my allowance? Will I have a gumdrop? Shall we cross the street? Exactly what is it you're Driving at?

[Homer Brown]

Are you crazy?

[Henry Aldrich]

See, that? There's another question. Well, let me tell you. My folks told me to keep my mouth shut, and I'm going to.

[Homer Brown]

You mean it's that bad?

[Henry Aldrich]

Homer, if you'll change that from a question to a statement, I'll tell you. Otherwise, you'll just have to wonder.

[Homer Brown]

Okay. Things at your house are pretty bad, aren't they? I mean, things are bad. Boy, they sure are.

[Henry Aldrich]

Do you know what I overheard my mother tell my father last night? She said she wouldn't ask him for $0.01 to run the house on for the next six weeks. Yeah, and she said she had a good head for business, too.

[Homer Brown]

Why'd she say a thing like that?

[Henry Aldrich]

Well, maybe she's going to help my father out. Gee, maybe I ought to find a way to help out, too.

[Homer Brown]

Henry, you're the very guy I want to talk to. How'd you like to go into business with me?

[Henry Aldrich]

What business?

[Homer Brown]

Look, I'm not asking you this, I'm telling you. Did you know there's a terrific demand for secondhand furniture and junk?

[Henry Aldrich]

Huh?

[Homer Brown]

Whatever you can dig up, somebody is darn fool enough to pay money for.

[Henry Aldrich]

Homer, since you're not asking me would I like to go into business with you, my answer is yes, I would.

[Alice Aldrich]

If you'll just come with me, Mr. Smith.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Uh huh.

[Alice Aldrich]

The chairs are right here in the coal bin. There they are.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Uh huh.

[Alice Aldrich]

As you see, they're ladderbacks.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Uh huh.

[Alice Aldrich]

And quite old, I believe.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Uh huh.

[Alice Aldrich]

Mrs. Smith, I'll be perfectly honest with you. I paid $25.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Well, you got a goodbye. These are valuable chairs.

[Alice Aldrich]

What?

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Yes, ma'.

[Henry Aldrich]

Am.

[Alice Aldrich]

You don't say. Wait until my husband hears that. He insists I have no business sense.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Where's the sixth chair?

[Alice Aldrich]

I only have five.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Oh, too bad. If you had the set of six, I could pay you $65 for them.

[Alice Aldrich]

You would? As much as that if you had six. Oh, my goodness.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Five are worthless. Worthless to me they are.

[Henry Aldrich]

Oh.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Uh huh.

[Alice Aldrich]

Now wait. It just occurred to me, Mr. Smith. There's the slightest possibility I might be able to get the other one. Yes, the couple who used to own them might have it kicking. That is lying around.

[Henry Aldrich]

Homer, are you sure that auction sale is going on for two more days?

[Homer Brown]

Positive. Come on, haul a sack in here.

[Henry Aldrich]

Okay, but what's in your room you can sell.

[Homer Brown]

If we look around in corners and underneath things, we might find anything.

[Henry Aldrich]

Hey, I know. Where's your stuffed rattlesnake?

[Homer Brown]

Under the bed. Only you know what I was thinking of selling?

[Henry Aldrich]

What the bed, Homer, you mean you'd auction off your own bed? Sure.

[Homer Brown]

My mother heard of one that brought $100 at yesterday's sale.

[Henry Aldrich]

No kidding.

[Homer Brown]

Of course, it was hand carved.

[Henry Aldrich]

Yeah, but the only thing carved on your bed is your initials. So what?

[Homer Brown]

Somebody might come along with the same initials and be crazy about it.

[Henry Aldrich]

But supposing you did get $100 for the darn thing. What would you sleep on?

[Homer Brown]

Who'd want to sleep?

[Henry Aldrich]

I know, but.

[Homer Brown]

And besides, Henry, aren't we trying to raise money to help your folks?

[Henry Aldrich]

Yeah.

[Homer Brown]

Okay, then. After all they've done for me, the least I can do in return is sleep on the floor.

[Henry Aldrich]

Homer, my father will certainly appreciate it.

[Homer Brown]

But, Henry, who's that out in the hall?

[Henry Aldrich]

I don't see anyone.

[Homer Brown]

It was a woman of some kind. She was sort of tiptoeing along, and all of a sudden she slid into my mother's bedroom.

[Henry Aldrich]

Do you suppose it's a cleaning woman?

[Homer Brown]

Here she comes out again.

[Alice Aldrich]

Well, hello, boy.

[Henry Aldrich]

Mother, is that you?

[Alice Aldrich]

Your father and I dropped in for a little visit with the Browns. My, what a lovely room you have here, Homer. Well, my goodness.

[Homer Brown]

What's the matter, Mrs. Aldrich?

[Alice Aldrich]

Homer, that little stool with the straw seat over there in the corner.

[Homer Brown]

It looks like that's the seat part of an old chair we used to have.

[Alice Aldrich]

What?

[Henry Aldrich]

Mother? What's the matter, Homer?

[Alice Aldrich]

Where's the rest of it? The back part.

[Homer Brown]

My father uses it for a pipe rack.

[Alice Aldrich]

You don't say. Oh, my, Homer, I. I suppose you're quite attached to that lovely little stool.

[Homer Brown]

No. Gee whiz. I only use it to rest my foot on when I'm shining my shoes.

[Alice Aldrich]

Really?

[Homer Brown]

Sure. And I hardly ever do that.

[Alice Aldrich]

Homer, that's wonderful.

[Homer Brown]

I wish my mother took that attitude.

[Alice Aldrich]

And the back of the chair is your father's pipe rack?

[Henry Aldrich]

Sure.

[Alice Aldrich]

Well, will you excuse me, boys? I'm going downstairs and speak to your father.

[Homer Brown]

Henry, do you think your folks have lost their home and they're moving in here with us?

[Henry Aldrich]

Gee whiz. Gee, Homer, are you putting that old stool in the bag?

[Homer Brown]

Sure. We're gonna sell it at the auction.

[Henry Aldrich]

That darn thing.

[Homer Brown]

Why not? If it looked good to your mother, it might look good to somebody else.

[Henry Aldrich]

You're crazy.

[Homer Brown]

Now, listen, Henry. Do you really want to help your folks or don't you?

[Narrator/Announcer]

And now, here's someone who can help all you folks. Meredith Wilson and his Talking People.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Intermission. Intermission. Take one. Take one.

[Homer Brown]

Take one.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Take one.

[Jello Family Member]

Now, what do you mean by that?

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Well, on your own Program at intermission time. You always tell your band to take five.

[Jello Family Member]

I see.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

But we can't wait that long to hear about the chairs.

[Jello Family Member]

So you want a one minute intermission. Well, I don't blame you. And it takes less than a minute to say Jell. O puddings made with milk are preferred by more people than any other prepared puddings in the world because of their three gram flavors. And they're all so different. You want to try all three? Luscious light bulb rich chocolatey chocolate and butlery brown. Bonnie, Bonnie.

[Homer Brown]

Brrr.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Scotch. They're Jello puddings.

[Jello Family Member]

You bet they are. And they're rich and distinctive and chuck full of real homemade goodness. And they cook in just about five minutes. Hey, you kids listening in? Now, when you go to the store for your mother for those swell Jello puddings, you look for the big red letters on the box.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

J, E, F, F, O. The big red letters stand for the Jello family. Oh, the big red letters stand for the Jello family. That's Jello. Yum yum yum. Jello puddings. Yum yum yum. Jello tap built the puddings yesterday.

[Jello Family Member]

And now back to the Aldrich family.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Yes, getting back to the the troubles of Henry Aldridge. Alice and Sam Aldridge discover that the five antique chairs she had bought at auction were worthless without the sixth, which they are now trying to get from the Browns. As a result, Henry and Homer believe Henry's parents are in financial difficulties. The scene opens at the Browns. It is a little later the same day.

[Sam Aldrich]

As I was saying, Will, I've certainly become attached to that pipe rack of yours.

[Will Brown]

That darn thing?

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Yes.

[Sam Aldrich]

It sort of grows on you. Why, it was only 5 minutes ago I first laid eyes on it.

[Will Brown]

It took 15 years for it to grow on me.

[Sam Aldrich]

Is that right? I certainly wish it were mine.

[Will Brown]

But Sam, you smoke cigars, don't you?

[Sam Aldrich]

I've suddenly taken up pipes.

[Will Brown]

What do you know? I thought pipes made you deathly sick.

[Sam Aldrich]

Well, they used to, but not anymore, Will.

[Will Brown]

Well then, here, let me make you a present.

[Sam Aldrich]

What?

[Will Brown]

Here's a pipe I've never touched. My wife's brother sent it to me. I wouldn't smoke it with a ten foot pole. But Will, it's yours, Sam. And here's some new tobacco I picked up. Yeah, I'll fill it up for you.

[Sam Aldrich]

But you see, Will.

[Will Brown]

Sam, would I ever give you anything if I really wanted it? I hope I haven't packed the tobacco in too tight.

[Sam Aldrich]

Oh, here's the light. Thank you, Will. Thank you very much.

[Will Brown]

Now there's a smoke. With authority, it's hardened me. As

[Sam Aldrich]

the only thing is now I really need a place to keep this pipe. What? Sam, I'll buy that pipe rack from. You will?

[Will Brown]

Well, Sam, did you.

[Alice Aldrich]

Well, what are you two so busy talking about?

[Sam Aldrich]

Why, we're simply.

[Alice Aldrich]

Sam, I never saw you smoke a pipe before.

[Sam Aldrich]

You didn't? Well, you're seeing me do it now.

[Will Brown]

Where have you been, Alice? Out in the kitchen with Elizabeth?

[Alice Aldrich]

No, I just went back upstairs to Sam. Do you feel well?

[Sam Aldrich]

Yes, I. I feel. Isn't it just a little close in here?

[Will Brown]

Oh, you noticed it too. Here, let me go open the front door for a minute.

[Alice Aldrich]

Sam, it's gone.

[Will Brown]

What's gone?

[Alice Aldrich]

The stool up in Homer's room. The other half of that pipe rack.

[Sam Aldrich]

It is.

[Homer Brown]

Dear.

[Alice Aldrich]

Don't you even care?

[Sam Aldrich]

Care?

[Will Brown]

Sam, I tell you what. If you want that doggone pipe rack so much, I'll sell it to you. Yes, sir. Give me a ten dollar bill and we'll call it square.

[Alice Aldrich]

Speak to me.

[Auctioneer]

Sold. Sold for 25 cents to the boy with the lady in the sailor pants.

[Homer Brown]

Gee whiz.

[Auctioneer]

Now, if you just wait a minute while we get the next few items up on the back.

[Homer Brown]

Boy. Henry, did you see that? 25 cents for my old left roller skate.

[Henry Aldrich]

Imagine.

[Homer Brown]

Aren't people d. Say, boy, they'll buy anything.

[Auctioneer]

And now we come to this very interesting item.

[Henry Aldrich]

Homer, it's your. The one my mother was so crazy about.

[Auctioneer]

We have here, folks, a very valuable looking. Well, it might make a fine milking stool.

[Homer Brown]

Or for shining shoes.

[Auctioneer]

Did I hear a bid of two?

[Homer Brown]

No. Gee, was. I just said.

[Henry Aldrich]

Homer, keep quiet. He didn't say two.

[Auctioneer]

Two I have. Who'll make it three? Oh, boy, do I hear $3. Three is bid. Three is bidding. Three is bid. Who'll make it $3?

[Homer Brown]

Sure. Who make it three?

[Auctioneer]

You will find $3 I have.

[Homer Brown]

No, $3 I have.

[Henry Aldrich]

What are you doing?

[Auctioneer]

Three dollars I'm bid for this unique and fascinating little item here. $3 is bid. I'm bid $3. $3. Who'll make it four?

[Homer Brown]

Henry, what do I do?

[Auctioneer]

No one says four. Well, it looks as if the young man in the front row was in luck.

[Homer Brown]

Who, me?

[Auctioneer]

Going for $3.

[Homer Brown]

Henry, it's costing me $3 going twice. It's my own stool.

[Auctioneer]

It's going.

[Henry Aldrich]

Support is available.

[Narrator/Announcer]

24.

[Henry Aldrich]

7 with VRBoCare. We're here day or night, ready whenever you need help. Because a great trip starts with the right support.

[Auctioneer]

Hey, what's the commotion back there.

[Henry Aldrich]

What's happening?

[Auctioneer]

Will the gentleman who just came in please find a seat? Perhaps he'd like to bid on this object.

[Homer Brown]

Yes, Henry. Somebody wants to buy it.

[Auctioneer]

The bid stands at $3. 3.5. I can't accept a 50 cent raise, sir.

[Homer Brown]

Why not?

[Auctioneer]

There's a young fellow here in the front row who's very eager to have this stool.

[Homer Brown]

No, I'm not. Honest.

[Sam Aldrich]

$10.

[Homer Brown]

What?

[Auctioneer]

That's more like it. Sold for $10 to the gentleman without a seat in the rear.

[Homer Brown]

Hold on.

[Henry Aldrich]

Who must have bought the stool?

[Homer Brown]

I don't know. I can't see back that far.

[Henry Aldrich]

See? You know, if I didn't happen to know my father was having financial difficulties, I'd swear it sounded.

[Sam Aldrich]

Oh, excuse me. Could you help me right away, please? I want to have this chair. Why, Gus.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Afternoon, Mr. Aldrich.

[Sam Aldrich]

I thought this was the cabinet makers.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

It is. But Gus, I'm the new apprentice.

[Sam Aldrich]

Apprentice?

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Yeah, you know, they take on young fellows and teach them the trade.

[Sam Aldrich]

But Gus, last week you were an exterminator.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Yeah, I give it up.

[Sam Aldrich]

Is that so?

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Yeah. There I'd be and there a poor little aunt would be and I'd give a whoosh. There I'd be and the little aunt wouldn't be. I Give it up, Mr. Aldrich.

[Sam Aldrich]

I see.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Went against my nature.

[Sam Aldrich]

Well, Gus, you see this chair, Is that what tis well, it used to be. Now can you take this stool?

[Gus (Apprentice)]

That reminds me of a chair I fixed once for my Aunt Hepzibah.

[Sam Aldrich]

What a wreck it was.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

No, no, she was.

[Sam Aldrich]

Gus, look, the chair wasn't really damaged.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Wasn't damaged? Oh yes, was my Uncle Horace. He went clear through it.

[Sam Aldrich]

The back part was used for a pipe rack, you see.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

No, no, couldn't have been used for that. Cause Aunt Hepzibah, she never smoked.

[Sam Aldrich]

What's that?

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Leastways, not a pipe.

[Sam Aldrich]

Now look, Gus.

[Gus (Apprentice)]

Although her mother, Great Aunt Jezebel 96, she was. She wouldn't be caught without a corncob.

[Sam Aldrich]

Now wait a minute, Gus.

[Alice Aldrich]

Well, Sam, there go the chairs.

[Sam Aldrich]

Thank goodness. I hope I've seen the last of them.

[Alice Aldrich]

You look tired, dear.

[Sam Aldrich]

Alice, do you realize I went through three generations of Gus's families to get that chair glued together?

[Alice Aldrich]

Well, let's go in the living room and sit down and count my $65.

[Sam Aldrich]

Your $65?

[Alice Aldrich]

Naturally, dear. I'll give you the 25 I paid for the chairs in the first place.

[Henry Aldrich]

Thank you.

[Alice Aldrich]

And that leaves me a clear profit of $40. And Sam, even you'll have to admit that's a very good business deal.

[Sam Aldrich]

Exactly how do you figure you cleared $40?

[Alice Aldrich]

Quite simple arithmetic, dear. 25 from 65 is 40, isn't it?

[Sam Aldrich]

Well, how about the $10 I paid will for the pipe rack? Oh, that and the $10 I paid at the auction for the stew.

[Alice Aldrich]

My goodness. You mean I owe you $20 more simple arithmetic. Very well. Here you are. That still leaves me a $20 profit.

[Sam Aldrich]

Did I mention it cost $12 to have that six chair repaired?

[Alice Aldrich]

$12?

[Sam Aldrich]

That leaves you eight.

[Alice Aldrich]

Well, $8 profit is $8 profit.

[Sam Aldrich]

How much did it cost you to have the chairs carted up here to the house?

[Alice Aldrich]

Why, not very much. Just $4.40. You mean all I have left is $3.60?

[Sam Aldrich]

I'm afraid so, Alice. Perhaps after this, you'll leave business to

[Alice Aldrich]

me, Sam, I have a clear profit of $3.60. And any business that doesn't operate in the red is a good business.

[Henry Aldrich]

Mother.

[Alice Aldrich]

Henry, where have you been?

[Henry Aldrich]

Handling a little business deal.

[Homer Brown]

Sure. And boy, did we clean up.

[Sam Aldrich]

You, too.

[Homer Brown]

And Henry has something to say to you.

[Henry Aldrich]

No, Mother. Homer has something to say. It was his idea. Go ahead, you say it.

[Homer Brown]

They're your folks, Henry, you say it.

[Henry Aldrich]

No, you. Well, go on, Homer. Don't be bashful. Well,

[Homer Brown]

you've always been pretty nice to me, Mrs. Aldrich. And Mr. Aldrich. You've been nice to me, too, at times. And now that you've had some hard luck and we've had some good luck, we'd like to give you half of what we've made.

[Alice Aldrich]

Homer, what are you talking about?

[Henry Aldrich]

Mother, I caught on. You didn't think you could keep it from me, did you?

[Sam Aldrich]

Keep what from you, Henry?

[Homer Brown]

Mr. Aldrich, Henry and I aren't kids. We can read between the lines. Didn't we just see a whole load of your furniture being hauled away?

[Alice Aldrich]

Yes, dear. We sold it to Mr. Smith.

[Homer Brown]

That's what I mean. Gee, if you need money that bad. Here, take this $5.12. Half of what we took in.

[Sam Aldrich]

Homer, we won't do anything of the kind.

[Henry Aldrich]

But, Father, that's the way Homer wants it. That's why he sold a valuable stool right out of his bedroom.

[Narrator/Announcer]

What?

[Alice Aldrich]

Sure, dear. That's very generous of you. Thank you very, very much.

[Homer Brown]

You're welcome, Mrs. Aldrich. And I hope you don't have to sell any more of your stuff.

[Henry Aldrich]

Come on, Homer.

[Homer Brown]

But if you do, will you let us handle the deal for you? I think we could do a lot better than you could Sam.

[Sam Aldrich]

And I thought I'd live to see everything.

[Homer Brown]

Sam.

[Sam Aldrich]

Now, Alice, don't cry, dear.

[Alice Aldrich]

I never knew boys could be so wonderful. Think of it, sharing what they made. 50. 50? Yes, dear, under the circumstances, don't you think we should do exactly as much for them?

[Sam Aldrich]

You mean give them half of your profit?

[Alice Aldrich]

Half of just 360? Oh, no, Sam. Half of all the money we got for the chairs.

[Sam Aldrich]

But, Alice, what about our expenses?

[Alice Aldrich]

Sam, did the boys deduct their expenses? Sometimes, dear, I think you don't know the first thing about business.

[Homer Brown]

Go ahead, hans.

[Henry Aldrich]

Sure. Say, Mr. Auctioneer, what can I do for you? Here's a genuine old antique wallet. I think.

[Auctioneer]

You don't say.

[Henry Aldrich]

Sure. And we'd like you to auction it off to the highest bidder.

[Auctioneer]

But a wallet like that isn't worth anything.

[Homer Brown]

Sure it is.

[Henry Aldrich]

Well, there's $5.12 inside for the benefit of Henry's parents.

[Auctioneer]

Why, boys, this is a case of real genuine old fashioned chivalry.

[Narrator/Announcer]

You bet. And when it comes to genuine old fashioned homemade goodness, you just can't beat Jell O puddings. Yes. Jell O chocolate, butterscotch and vanilla puddings. A trio of treats. Tomorrow try chocolate peppermint pudding. Just prepare one package of smooth, velvety rich Jell O chocolate pudding. As usual, while still warm, add crushed peppermint stick candy, let it chill, and then top this luscious dessert with whipped cream and sprigs of mint. Remember, all three Jell O puddings made with milk are nourishing and they cook in just about five minutes. Ask for Jell O puddings with those big red letters on the box. Those big red letters stand for the Jello family.

[Henry Aldrich]

Here's hoping you'll be in your living room in ours next week at this same time. Good night, folks.

[Narrator/Announcer]

The Aldrich Family, starring Ezra Stone as Henry with Jackie Kelk as Homer, is written by Patricia Jodhry and Del Dimsdale with music by Jack Miller. Mr. And Mrs. Aldrich are house Jamison and Katherine Roth. And this is Dan Seymour in New York saying the Aldrich family is brought to you by the Jello Family.

[Henry Aldrich]

Everyone's a Jell O good fellow A very good Jello good fellow so rich, so tempting and mellow J, E L L, O.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Stay tuned in for the Burns and Allen show which follows immediately over most of these stations.

[Sam Aldrich]

This is NBC, the National Broadcasting Company.