Any Bonds Today - Baby Snooks And Daddy Buy Some Defense Bonds

Summary

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Podcast Summary: "Any Bonds Today - Baby Snooks And Daddy Buy Some Defense Bonds"

Podcast: Harold's Old Time Radio
Episode Date: April 1, 2026
Main Cast: Fanny Brice (Baby Snooks), Hanley Stafford (Daddy), Igor Gorin (Guest Singer), Narrator: Larry Elliott
Original Broadcast Purpose: U.S. Treasury Department public service program promoting defense bonds and thrift during wartime

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Episode Overview

This episode features the iconic comedy sketch duo Baby Snooks and her Daddy in a patriotic, humorous vignette crafted to promote the purchase of U.S. Defense Bonds and Stamps during the WWII era. Interwoven with music and poignant appeals, the broadcast combines laughter, information, and a direct call to civic duty. Notably, the episode includes a moving segment by distinguished baritone Igor Gorin, who shares his immigrant story and sings a song inspired by the Pledge of Allegiance.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Introduction to Bonds and Thrift

• [00:26–01:34] The episode opens with the catchy “Any Bonds Today?” jingle—reminding listeners of the importance of buying defense bonds.
• [01:17–01:34] Narrator explains Daddy (Hanley Stafford) is taking Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice) to the post office for her first lesson in thrift—buying defense stamps.

2. Comedy Sketch: Snooks and Daddy at the Post Office

• [01:34–09:33]
  • Snooks is confusedly carrying her money, candy, and chewing gum in her shoes and even talks about sewing cash into her pants ("you said I should always have a little money in the back of me" [03:59]).
  • Daddy aims to teach Snooks about being thrifty and patriotic by buying defense stamps.
  • The sketch is characteristically silly, with Snooks' literal interpretations and stubborn questions, including confusion about Uncle Sam versus Santa Claus [06:13].
  • Daddy explains to Snooks that defense stamps and bonds help Uncle Sam—not a real uncle, but the American national symbol—to build the nation’s strength ("He represents our government in everything that's American. And his name is Uncle Sam." [06:47]).
  • Snooks resists, questioning who Uncle Sam is and why she should part with her money, providing comic misunderstandings and giving Daddy a hard time.

3. Patriotic Messaging

• [08:26–09:33]
  • Daddy delivers a moving monologue about what defense stamps do: "Battleships will be built, airplanes will roll into production… even food for the army will be bought." [08:44]
  • He emphasizes collective effort: "Just imagine if every person in America did the same thing. Snooks, strange as this may sound, your 30 cents may save half of the world." [09:07]

4. Musical and Immigrant Perspective

• [09:33–10:57]
  • Igor Gorin shares his immigration story and his pride in becoming an American: "The right to say I am an American. Finally, the day came for me to stand before a judge and recite… the Pledge to the Flag." [10:01]
  • Gorin performs a moving musical rendition of the Pledge of Allegiance, set to music by composer Albert Hay Malotte.

5. Closing Patriotic Call-to-Action

• [12:44–13:44]
  • Narrator Larry Elliott delivers a passionate close, urging every American to contribute:
    • “Pour out your dollars in reply. Pour them out in a steady, never ending stream that fills the war chest of our nation and keeps it flowing over." [12:44]
    • The episode ends with a reprise of “Any Bonds Today?”, reinforcing the call to support the war effort.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On thrift gone awry:
  • “You said I should always have a little money in the back of me.” – Baby Snooks misunderstanding Daddy’s thrift advice [03:59]
• On patriotism and misunderstanding:
  • “Uncle Sam? Who’s he?” – Baby Snooks, confusing Uncle Sam with Santa Claus [06:18]
• The immigrant dream:
  • “The right to say I am an American.” – Igor Gorin on achieving citizenship [10:01]
• The power of small efforts:
  • “Just imagine if every person in America did the same thing. Your 30 cents may save half the world.” – Daddy [09:07]
• Final call to action:
  • “Buy a bond now and every payday. Hereafter make your regular bond buying answer Adolf Hitler's boast, ‘Have you bought any bonds today?’” – Narrator / Larry Elliott [13:26]

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Key Timestamps

| Time | Segment | |-----------|------------------------------------------------------| | 00:26 | Opening song: "Any Bonds Today?" | | 01:34 | Baby Snooks and Daddy Post Office Sketch Opens | | 03:59 | Snooks explains "money in the back of me" | | 06:00 | Daddy explains Uncle Sam | | 07:46 | Daddy explains interest & how bonds work | | 08:44 | Patriotic monologue on importance of sacrifice | | 09:33 | Narrator introduces Igor Gorin | | 10:01 | Igor Gorin shares his American dream | | 10:57 | Gorin performs Pledge of Allegiance song | | 12:44 | Narrator’s stirring call-to-action | | 13:44 | Closing song replay: "Any Bonds Today?" |

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Tone and Style

The episode blends classic vaudevillian banter, affectionate family humor, and stirring patriotism—matching the style of 1940s radio. It’s both entertaining and earnest, aiming to inspire listeners through laughter and national pride to participate in civic action.

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Summary Takeaway

This episode serves as both a delightful time capsule of radio-era family comedy and a powerful piece of wartime propaganda. Through Baby Snooks’ comic antics and a heartfelt musical interlude from Igor Gorin, the message is clear: every American’s contribution, no matter how small, is part of a collective effort to secure freedom and support the war. The calls for thrift, civic duty, and investment in defense bonds encapsulate the spirit of the era—and remain a remarkable example of how entertainment was marshaled for the national cause.

Transcript

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[Narrator / Larry Elliott]

Any bonds today? Starring Fanny Brice as Baby Snooks and Igor Goren on a special recorded program of the United States Treasury Department.

[Freedom Man / Singer]

By the way, have you bought any bonds today? Any bonds today? Bonds of freedom, that's what I'm selling Any bonds today? Scrape up the most you can Here comes the freedom man Asking you to buy a share of freedom today Any stamps today? We'll be blessed if we all invest in the USA Here comes the freedom man can't make tomorrow's plan not unless you buy a share of freedom today

[Narrator / Larry Elliott]

Any bonds today? Well, no. It's defense stamps that Daddy Hanley Stafford wants Fanny Brice in her roll of baby Snooks to buy. Daddy's giving her her first lesson in thrift. Here they are in a sketch written by Phil Rapp.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

All right, here's the post office. Have you got your money ready?

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Yes, Daddy.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Where is it?

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

I got it in my shoe and.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Your shoe. No wonder you've been hobbling along like a stilt walker when all the way over here Your left foot's 4 inches higher than your right foot. Take off that left shoe.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

My money's in the other shoe, Daddy.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Well, why is your left shoe like that?

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

That's where I got my candy.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Good heavens, you're not going to eat that stuff after walking on it, are you?

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Why?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Oh, take up both your shoes and let's hem to the mouse. Come in.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Hold down one, Daddy.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

I'll sit down here. Now take off those shoes.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

The socks, too?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

No, just the shoes.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Well, how will I get my chewing gum?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Snopes, you didn't put chewing gum in your socks.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Didn't I?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Look at that mess. The money's all in pennies, too. Chewing gum, chocolates and a piece of apple.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Where's my lipo?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Here it is. Whatever possessed you to conceal all this stuff in your shoes?

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

I was afraid we'd be held up.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Oh, what a ridiculous notion. Why should you be held up?

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Well, you was held up last night when you came back from the lodge.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Who told you that?

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Mommy did. He said two men held you up all the way home.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Now, that's a malicious flash. I walk every bit of the way myself.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Oh, Daddy.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Now, don't smirk. It's Enough. I have to suffer those indignities from your mother without you repeating them.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

I didn't tell nobody.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Well, make sure you don't.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Why?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Because a false rumor will spread that I came home inebriated and you know I'm a man of regular habits.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Is that one of your regular habits, Daddy?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

No. And I forbid you ever to mention the incident again.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Why?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Don't be aggravating, snooks. I brought you to this post office to teach you the virtue of thrift, and you're already trying my patience. Is this all the money you had? 30 cents?

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

No.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Where's the rest of it?

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

I sewed it on the bath and white pants.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

What for?

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

You said to do it.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Daddy, I told you to sew money on your pants.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Yeah, he said I should always have a little money in the back of me.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Oh, that's a wonderful interpretation. Take off your. Oh, no, no, you can't do it.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Why?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Because it doesn't look nice to come to a post office and remove your clothes. Maybe you can go in the mail room.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Ain't they got a female room?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

I'm talking about the room where they keep the letters.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Can we read the letters, Daddy?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Of course not.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Why?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Because it's against the law to open letters that don't belong to you. They can put a person in jail for reading other people's mail.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Mommy opens all your letters.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Yeah, I know it, but it's different with a man and wife.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Let me put her in jail.

[Narrator / Larry Elliott]

No.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Why?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Don't worry. I'm working on it. Now, put your shoes and stuffings on.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

I want to go barefoot. No, I want to go bare.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Oh, stop making me think or I'll t hide.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

I want to play hide and seek.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Now, that's enough. Put your shoes on. Quick. Now the other one. Now, come on. We're going to invest this 30 cents of yours. Now, come on.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

What's this picture on the wall, Daddy?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Oh, it's a reward poster put there by the Federal Bureau to aid in the search for mail. Bandits. What does it say? It says murderer wanted. Let's see.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Are you gonna ask for the job?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

It's not a job. Come on now, here's the window. I want. Give me your 30 cents.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Why?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

To buy defense stamps.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

What's defense dance?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

They are little tokens issued at various prices from $0.10 to $5. And when you get enough of them, you can get a defense bond.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

What for?

[Narrator / Larry Elliott]

What for?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

To help Uncle Sam, of course.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Why don't we help Uncle Louie?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

This is not a real Uncle. Uncle Sam is the guiding spirit of America. You've seen those pictures of that colorful old man with the beard, haven't you?

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Santa Claus?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Not Santa Claus. Uncle Sam.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Who's he?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

I told you. He's the patriotic symbol of this country. Just like John Bull is the symbol of Great Britain. We've had him with us since America was founded.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

John Bull?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

No, Uncle Sam. He's always portrayed as a sort of Yankee character. And he wears stars and stripes.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Has he got a big nurse? Does he wear a high hat?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

That's it. And he gets his name from the initials U.S. who does? Uncle Sam.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Who is he?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

The man I'm telling you about. He represents our government in everything that's American. And his name is Uncle Sam.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Does he know Anne Sophie?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

No. Why? I don't know. The important thing is he wants you, your 30s hands.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Who does?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

How are you yelling about?

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

I ain't gonna give my money.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Look, it's for your own benefit, Snooks. If you buy defense stamps for that $0.30, you'll always have it.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

I got it. Gnarling knife.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Yes, but you might spend it. If you buy stamps, Uncle Sam will get the money and return it to you.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Will he spend it?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Certainly.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

No, he won't.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Why not?

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Cause he ain't gonna get Snopes.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

This is not only a saving proposition. Every real American should buy these defense stamps and bonds, apart from the interest involved.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

What's interest, Daddy?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Well, it's a premium paid for the use of the money, usually reckoned as a percentage, like interest at 5% per annum of $5,000. That means you get back $250 at the end of a year.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Two hundred and fifty dollars?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

That's right.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

How can they afford it for 30 cents?

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Oh, give me that money. Now, keep quiet. Give me three, ten. Ten defense stamps, please. Thank you very much. Flying snooks. Curious pants.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

I'm glad I stole the other money in my pants.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Now, listen to me. You've just done a very noble thing, Sooks. You're too young to understand now, but America today is facing a grave emergency. The president has called upon the financial aid of the entire nation. And you want to help, don't you?

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Now,

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

listen. The few cents you've exchanged for those stamps will be put to work instantly. Defense workers are slaving night and day at different projects, helping to make an impregnable fortress of this country. To keep our strength so that we may help others. Battleships will be built, airplanes will roll into production. Tanks, guns and even food. For the army will be bought.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

All of my 30 cents.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Don't you think? It doesn't help. Now just imagine if every person in America did the same thing. Snokes, strange as this may sound, your 30 cents may save half of the world. Yes.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Turn me over, Daddy.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

I'm not going to spank you.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

I know. I want to get the rest of the money and save the other half of the world.

[Narrator / Larry Elliott]

Well, Baby Snooks has a great idea there. And our next guest agrees with her. A brilliant young artist noted for his operatic and concert successes here and abroad. His name is familiar to all. Igor Gorin. He's going to sing for you a song born from his own great love for America. But he wants to tell you about it himself. I present to you Igor Gorin.

[Igor Gorin]

Ladies and gentlemen, when I first came to this country six years ago, I applied immediately for my citizenship papers to achieve the great dream of my life. The right to say I am an American. Finally the day came for me to stand before a judge and recite the creed of faith and the principles of our nation. The Pledge to the Flag. Among those present in the courtroom was the well known composer Albert Heim A lot. He was so moved by the solemnity of the occasion that he was inspired to set the Pledge of Allegiance to music. To let the world know how it felt to witness the making of an American. Tonight I should like to sing the song born of this inspiration, the Pledge to the Flag.

[Daddy Hanley Stafford]

Sam.

[Freedom Man / Singer]

Sa.

[Baby Snooks (Fanny Brice)]

Forever.

[Narrator / Larry Elliott]

And justice for all. That's the prime principle of every American today. We are fighting for that principle. Adolf Hitler has said two worlds are in conflict and one must break asunder. Americans, I ask you which world shall break? Ours or Hitler's? Pour out your dollars in reply. Pour them out in a steady, never ending stream that fills the war chest of our nation and keeps it flowing over. Put every dollar you can into defense bonds sold by any bank, post office or savings and loan association. Put every possible dime into defense stamps sold by retail merchants and even by newspaper carrier. Boys, buy a bond now and every payday. Hereafter make your regular bond buying answer. Adolf Hitler's Bose, have you bought any bonds today?

[Freedom Man / Singer]

Any bonds today? Bonds of freedom, that's what I'm selling Any bonds today? Scrape up the most you can. Here comes the freedom man Asking you to buy a share of freedom today and it stands today we'll be blessed if we all invest in the USA Here comes a freedom man can't make tomorrow's plan not unless you buy a share of freedom today.

[Narrator / Larry Elliott]

You've been listening to Any Bonds Today, a recorded program of the United States Treasury Department for defense bonds and stamps. Stars of this program were Fanny Bryce as Baby Snook, Hanley Stafford as Daddy, Igor Goran and Barry Wood. This is Larry Elliott speaking for the Treasury Department.

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