Archie Andrews 46-07-20 The Hammock

Summary

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Podcast Summary: Harold's Old Time Radio

Episode: Archie Andrews 46-07-20 – "The Hammock"
Date: September 5, 2025
Host: Harold’s Old Time Radio

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Episode Overview

This episode of "Harold's Old Time Radio" presents a classic episode of The Adventures of Archie Andrews, dating back to July 20th, 1946. The central theme is a comedic misadventure revolving around Archie and his father, Mr. Andrews, both independently deciding to put up a hammock on a hot summer day. Their parallel efforts result in confusion, hard work, and ultimately the destruction (and gifting) of two hammocks—all the while, the extended family and friends bounce in and out of the story with their typical quirks.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Morning at the Andrews’ House (01:15 – 03:00)

• Archie’s Reluctance to Chores: Archie tries to avoid household chores, attempting to justify his plans by referencing famous historical figures.

  • Notable quote:
    Archie Andrews (01:47): "Where would Napoleon be if he’d spent his time mowing lawns? Or Edison, or Abraham Lincoln, or any great man. Did they putter around the house?"

• Failed Swimming Plans: Archie tries to arrange a swimming outing by calling Veronica and Betty, both of whom decline due to other commitments. Jughead also refuses because of a sunburn.

2. The Genesis of the Hammock Plan (05:16 – 06:19)

• Idea Born from Laziness: Jughead sarcastically suggests Archie should "just put up a hammock and lie there quietly" (05:45), spurring Archie’s enthusiasm for the idea.

3. Buying the Hammock from Mr. Higgins (06:19 – 07:31)

• Comic Salesmanship: Mr. Higgins, the hardware store owner, tries to upsell Archie everything except the hammock, leading to a humorous back-and-forth.
  • Notable quote:
    Mr. Higgins (06:24): "How about a new lawnmower? Got a beauty in special at 14..." Archie (06:45): "Mr. Higgins, I don't want any paint or turpentine or batteries or pails, nails or snails."

4. Swimming Option Returns—and Recedes (07:37 – 08:26)

• Veronica returns, now available to go swimming, but Archie has spent all his money on the hammock. He tries to return it, only to be upsold on a cushion for it instead.

5. Mr. Lodge and Mr. Andrews’ Hammock Conversation (09:39 – 11:09)

• The Grown-Ups’ Turn: Mr. Lodge remarks about the pleasure of a hammock, slyly prompting Mr. Andrews to want one for himself. Mr. Andrews takes pride in his handiness and heads to buy a hammock from Higgins.

6. Construction Confusion (13:02 – 15:18)

• Hammocks Too Short/Too Close: Both Archie and his father struggle with placement: Archie's hammock is too short for the trees, and Mr. Andrews’ hammock hangs so low it touches the ground.
  • Dialogue highlight:
    Archie Andrews (13:30): "Never mind, Jug. Hand me the hammock and I'll hang it. I'm anxious to see how it looks." Jughead (13:35): "Now I hang one end on this hook and the other end on the...On...well gee whiz, Jughead, it doesn't reach. Gee whiz, this hammock's too small."

7. Shuffling Back and Forth: Tools and Shade (15:34 – 19:10)

• Tool Confusion: A comedic relay of saws and two-by-fours between Archie and his dad, with Jughead as the go-between.
• Sun Problem: Both parties realize after hard labor that the sun has shifted, forcing them to move their hammocks—and dig new holes—multiple times.

8. The Final Irony (21:18 – 28:22)

• Double Hammock Realization: Betty points out Archie now has two hammocks; he’s unaware his father has put one up too. Both Archie and Mr. Andrews independently decide to take down their hammocks, gifting them away to avoid embarrassment.
  • Notable quote:
    Archie Andrews (21:41): "Betty, from now on, if anyone asks you, you tell them. For me, putting up a hammock is about the most difficult job in the world!"
  • Notable quote:
    Mr. Andrews (24:35): "If I never hear that word hammock again, it'll be too soon."

9. The Inevitable Twist (27:27 – 27:43)

• Mrs. Andrews Returns: She surprises Archie and Mr. Andrews by producing a portable hammock she purchased at Higgins, meaning all their efforts were for nothing.
  • Memorable bit:
    Mrs. Andrews (27:41): "Why, a hammer, dear." Everyone: "...A portable hammock!"

10. Closing Scene Gag (28:44 – 29:12)

• Mr. Higgins’ Mishap: In a coda, it's revealed that Mr. Higgins, the hardware store owner, fell out of his own hammock and broke his arm—a final nod to the theme’s comedic frustration.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)

• Archie evokes famous men to escape chores:
  (01:47) "Where would Napoleon be if he’d spent his time mowing lawns?" — Archie Andrews
• Jughead on chores:
  (05:29) "You could fix that broken screen door." — Jughead
  (05:31) "What for? It'll only break again." — Archie Andrews
• Mr. Higgins’ sales persistence:
  (06:41) "How about some paint or turpentine and can?" — Mr. Higgins
• Archie’s frustration with hammock setup:
  (13:35) "Gee whiz, Jughead, it doesn't reach. Gee whiz, this hammock's too small." — Archie Andrews
• Archie and Mr. Andrews both lamenting:
  (20:01) "Gee whiz, Jug, why didn't you watch the sun?" — Archie Andrews
  (24:35) "If I never hear that word hammock again, it'll be too soon." — Mr. Andrews
• Archie gives Betty his unused hammock:
  (22:59) "You’ve got to, Betty, as a favor to me. If my father sees it, I’d never hear the end of it." — Archie Andrews
• The final twist with Mrs. Andrews' gift:
  (27:41) "Why, a hammer, dear." — Mrs. Andrews
  (27:43) "A portable hammock."

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Important Segment Timestamps

• 01:00 – 04:09: Archie tries to wrangle friends for swimming; fails.
• 05:16 – 06:19: Jughead’s suggestion for a hammock is made.
• 06:19 – 07:31: Archie’s farcical visit to the hardware store.
• 07:37 – 08:26: Veronica returns; Archie can’t afford swimming.
• 09:39 – 11:09: Mr. Lodge plants the hammock idea with Mr. Andrews.
• 13:02 – 14:13: Both Archie and his father have difficulties installing hammocks.
• 15:34 – 17:48: Scramble for tools and materials.
• 19:01 – 20:15: The sun ruins the hammock setup; both must move them.
• 21:18 – 22:59: Archie realizes there are now two hammocks.
• 24:35 – 27:43: Both Archie and Mr. Andrews dispose of their hammocks, only to have Mrs. Andrews bring home a portable one.
• 28:44 – 29:12: Closing gag about Mr. Higgins’ accident with his own hammock.

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Conclusion & Takeaways

This episode is a charming showcase of Archie Andrews’s gentle, circular slapstick, where the simplest tasks spiral into chaos. Its humor shines through character interplay, repeated gags, and an overarching theme of avoidable labor made worse by pride and miscommunication.

Listeners witness both generational parallels (Archie and his father) and light satire about 1940s home life. Anyone fond of classic radio, situational comedy, or the Archie Comics universe will delight in the warmth and wit of "The Hammock"—and sympathize with their vow to never again hear the word "hammock."

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Transcript

[Narrator]

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[Jughead]

Hello?

[Archie Andrews]

Hello, Jughead? This is Archie. Come over right away. It's a matter of life or death.

[Jughead]

Oh, relax, Archie.

[Veronica Lodge]

Relax.

[Announcer]

Yes, and you relax too, folks, if you can, because here he is again, right out of the pages of Archie Comics Magazine with all his gang. Archie.

[Mr. Higgins]

Andrew.

[Announcer]

Well, it's a sunny Saturday morning as we look in on the Andrews home in Riverdale. Archie has just come downstairs.

[Veronica Lodge]

Is that you, Archie?

[Archie Andrews]

Yes, mom, it's me.

[Veronica Lodge]

I.

[Archie Andrews]

Why, I.

[Veronica Lodge]

It's I.

[Archie Andrews]

Yes, I know it's you, Mom.

[Veronica Lodge]

No, Archie, you said it's me, and you should say it's I.

[Archie Andrews]

What's the difference, mom, as long as I'm here.

[Veronica Lodge]

All right, Archie, you win. I'm glad you're up early, dear. There's some things around the house I want you to do, and you need to.

[Archie Andrews]

Oh, but mom, on a day like this.

[Veronica Lodge]

I know, dear, but it's high time.

[Archie Andrews]

You mowed the lawn. Oh, but mom, just think, where would Napoleon be if he'd spent his time mowing lawns or. Or Edison or Abraham Lincoln or any great man. Did they put her around the house?

[Veronica Lodge]

They certainly did.

[Archie Andrews]

You see, I. Huh? Oh, but Mom, I got important things to do.

[Veronica Lodge]

Now, just what is so important?

[Archie Andrews]

Gee whiz, mom, what do you think it is? I'm going swimming.

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, I hadn't realized it was anything that important.

[Archie Andrews]

Sure, soon as I get someone to go with me.

[Veronica Lodge]

All right, Archie, go ahead. I suppose it's too warm to do anything else.

[Archie Andrews]

Oh, gee, thanks, Mom. I'm gonna call Veronica. Operator, get me Riverdale 318, please. Lazy bones lying in the sun. Never again a day's work.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Are you on the phone?

[Archie Andrews]

Yes, dad.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Oh, well, hurry up. I have a call to make.

[Archie Andrews]

Yes, dad.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Hello? That you are?

[Archie Andrews]

Uh huh. Is that you, Veronica?

[Veronica Lodge]

Uh huh.

[Archie Andrews]

Hiya, Veronica.

[Veronica Lodge]

Hello, Archie.

[Archie Andrews]

Veronica, would you like to go swimming today?

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, I'd love to go swimming with you, Archie, but I have an appointment at the beauty parlor in five minutes and I have to hurry.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Bye now.

[Veronica Lodge]

Huh.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Hello?

[Archie Andrews]

Hello, phone?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Gee whiz, Archie, are you through with that phone?

[Archie Andrews]

Not yet, dad.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

I'll hurry up.

[Archie Andrews]

I'll just be a minute, dad. Hello, operator, get me Riverdale 426, please. Lazy bones lying in the sun never get a day's work done. Betty, this is Archie.

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, hi, Archie.

[Archie Andrews]

Hiya, Betty.

[Veronica Lodge]

Yes, Archie.

[Archie Andrews]

Betty, would you like to go swimming today?

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, I'd love to go swimming, Archie, but I have to go shopping with Mother.

[Archie Andrews]

Oh, but Betty, couldn't you.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Wow's calling me right now.

[Veronica Lodge]

Bye now, Archie.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Gee whiz, Archie, are you through yet?

[Archie Andrews]

Not yet, Dad. I just gotta make one more call.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Oh, Archie, for gosh sake.

[Archie Andrews]

This will just take a second, dad. Operator, Riverdale783. In a hurry, please. Lazybones lying in the sun never get a day's work done that way. Hello, Jug?

[Jughead]

Yeah, Archie.

[Archie Andrews]

Jug, come over right away.

[Jughead]

Why?

[Archie Andrews]

We're going swimming.

[Jughead]

Not me.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

I'm not.

[Archie Andrews]

Gee whiz, Jug. Why not?

[Jughead]

I got a bad sunburn.

[Archie Andrews]

Gee whiz, on a swell day like.

[Jughead]

This, my sunburn doesn't know what kind of day this is.

[Archie Andrews]

But, Jug, you just gotta come swimming. We'll go down to the Nothin doin'.

[Jughead]

I look like an embarrassed lobster now.

[Archie Andrews]

Oh, gee whiz. I guess I don't go swimming today. Well, come on over anyway, Jug. We'll do something.

[Jughead]

Okay, fine.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Archie, are you through with that phone yet?

[Archie Andrews]

Yes, dad.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Oh. Oh, well, good. Now, what nonsense are you up to today, son?

[Archie Andrews]

Nonsense? Why, dad, you know I'm never up to any nonsense. No, of course not, dad. As a matter of fact, I plan to spend the entire day working around the house. See you later, dad.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Goodbye, Son. Working around the house. Working around the house. Mary. Oh, Mary.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Yes, dear?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Is there anything wrong with Archie.

[Archie Andrews]

Jug? I ought to be doing something. There's a lot of things to be done around the house.

[Jughead]

Well, you could cut the grass.

[Archie Andrews]

What for? It only grows up again.

[Jughead]

You could paint the front fence.

[Archie Andrews]

What for it? It'll only get dirty again.

[Jughead]

You could fix that broken screen door.

[Archie Andrews]

What for? It'll only break again. Give me a piece of that candy, Jug.

[Jughead]

What for? You'd only get hungry again.

[Archie Andrews]

Don't be funny, Jug.

[Jughead]

Thanks.

[Archie Andrews]

Hmm, yes, I ought to do something around the house.

[Jughead]

Archie, why don't you just put up a hammock and lie there quietly?

[Archie Andrews]

Jug, now you've got something. That's exactly what I intend to. Yes, sir, I can see me now. Just lying in the shade, swinging gently back and forth. Ah, that's the life.

[Jughead]

You haven't even got the hammock up yet.

[Archie Andrews]

Oh, it won't take a minute. Jug. Soon as we buy one, I'll string it between those two shady trees on the left side of the house. Come on. Here's the hardware store.

[Mr. Higgins]

Well, hello, Archie. What can I do for you today?

[Archie Andrews]

Hello, Mr. Higgins. I want to buy you something.

[Mr. Higgins]

How about a new lawnmower? Archie just got a beauty in special at 14.

[Archie Andrews]

No thanks. We have a lawnmower. All I want is a nice.

[Mr. Higgins]

How about a mop or brooms or pails? No thanks, just a nice some screws, tacks or nails.

[Archie Andrews]

No, all I want is more.

[Mr. Higgins]

You care for some batteries, knives or pans?

[Archie Andrews]

No, thank you. I just want a knife.

[Mr. Higgins]

How about some paint or turpentine and can?

[Archie Andrews]

Mr. Higgins? I don't want any paint or turpentine of batteries or pails, nails or snails.

[Mr. Higgins]

Well, what do you want?

[Jughead]

I forgot a hammock, remember?

[Archie Andrews]

Oh yeah, that's right, a hammock. Mr. Higgins.

[Mr. Higgins]

Why didn't you say so? Why didn't you say so?

[Archie Andrews]

Well, I've been trying to for about five minutes.

[Mr. Higgins]

Here's a dandy hammock made by the Swing low Sweet Chariot Company. Only 20. Only $5. This one.

[Archie Andrews]

Oh, mark down half $5.

[Mr. Higgins]

Gee whiz, I think it's the last hammock I have too.

[Archie Andrews]

Well, okay, I'll take it. Here you are.

[Mr. Higgins]

Thank you.

[Archie Andrews]

Bye now.

[Mr. Higgins]

You sure you don't need a garden hose?

[Archie Andrews]

No, no hose. Thanks.

[Mr. Higgins]

How about some oil or a hammer?

[Archie Andrews]

No, no hammer.

[Mr. Higgins]

You need a lawn spring race?

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

No. Thanks a lot. No, no thanks.

[Archie Andrews]

Oh, wow. I thought we'd never get out of there. He's a real salesman, that guy.

[Veronica Lodge]

Yeah, well, Archie Andrews, I was just looking for you.

[Archie Andrews]

Gee, Veronica. Well, what are you doing here?

[Veronica Lodge]

Well, I decided it was much too hot to go to the beauty parlor, so I canceled my appointment.

[Archie Andrews]

You did?

[Veronica Lodge]

Uh huh. And I'd love to go swimming with you.

[Archie Andrews]

Gee whiz, I can't go now.

[Veronica Lodge]

Why not?

[Archie Andrews]

I just spent my last cent on this hammock.

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, really?

[Archie Andrews]

Gee whiz, Jug, why did you have to suggest my putting up a hammock in the first place?

[Jughead]

But Archie, all I said was.

[Archie Andrews]

Wait a minute. Maybe Mr. Higgins will take it back and give me my money.

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, do you think he will?

[Archie Andrews]

Of course he will. After all, I bought it just a minute ago. It hasn't even been used yet. You wait right here and I'll be right back.

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, gee, Jug, I hope he gets it. I'd certainly love to go swimming. Yeah, it's a lovely day for swimming.

[Jughead]

Yeah.

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, here comes Archie. Did he give you your money back?

[Archie Andrews]

Archie, give me my money back, Veronica. He sold me a cushion to go with the hammock.

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, Father.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Hello, Veronica. I was just going for a walk. You want to see me?

[Veronica Lodge]

Yes, I did, Father. Isn't it awfully warm today?

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Yes, it certainly is.

[Veronica Lodge]

Father, you know what I've been thinking?

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

No, what?

[Veronica Lodge]

That it would be wonderful to have a hammock on our lawn.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Would be kind of nice.

[Veronica Lodge]

Why don't you put one up, Father? I know where you can get a lovely hammock and. Very reasonable choice.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Rebecca.

[Veronica Lodge]

Yes, Father.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Let's hear no more about my putting up a hammock. Only a fool would put up a hammock on a day like this.

[Mr. Higgins]

Mary.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Yes, dear?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Mary, do you have some more of this lemonade?

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Yes, dear.

[Veronica Lodge]

I'll bring it right out.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

All right, dear.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Oh, never get a day's work done.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Lying in the new moan oh, when you go fishing I'll bet you keep wishing hi there, Lodge. Yes, Well, I am comfortable. Well, up here in the shade.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Thanks. Don't mind if I do.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Well, where are you going?

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

No place special. Just a little stroll. You know, I believe your porch is better ventilation than mine.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Oh, does it?

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Yes. Real comfortable here.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Yes, yes. Yes, it is.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Of course, there is one thing you need on your property.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Really? What's that?

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

A hammock.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

A hammock? Yeah.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

There's nothing more comfortable than lying in a hammock in the shade.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

You know, Lodge, you've got. Yes, you're right.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

You could put it over right on the right side of your house.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

That would be a nice place for it.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Why don't you do it right now?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Now or the. No, no. I don't know. It's a little too hot for that, I think.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Of course, if you're not handy with tools.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Not handy. Lodge, I'll have you know I can do anything around this house. Anything. In fact, I tell you what.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Yes?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

If you will give me a hand, I'll go right down and get a hammock at Higgins Hardware Store.

[Archie Andrews]

How'd you make out, Jug?

[Jughead]

Pinky's father doesn't like hammocks. How'd you make out?

[Archie Andrews]

Betty's father says he always falls out of hammocks.

[Jughead]

Gee, and Mr. Lodge doesn't want a hammock.

[Archie Andrews]

Yeah, but Veronica's talking to Mr. Mantle. Maybe he'll. Oh, here she comes now. How'd you make out, Veronica?

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, just fine.

[Archie Andrews]

You mean Mr. Mandle will buy the hammock?

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, no, but Reggie wants to take me swimming.

[Archie Andrews]

Oh, fine. That's great.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Great.

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, but, Archie, you wouldn't want poor little me to sit home and just melt away on a day like this, would you?

[Archie Andrews]

Gosh, no, Veronica. But I tell you what, just wait right here. Maybe my father will pay for this hammock.

[Veronica Lodge]

All right. But her.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Mom.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Oh, Mom. Yes, dear?

[Archie Andrews]

Where's dad?

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

He went downtown for a while.

[Archie Andrews]

Gee whiz. Okay, Mom. Thanks. Well, Veronica, I guess you better keep your date with Reggie. My father probably wouldn't want a hammock anyway.

[Mr. Higgins]

A hammock? You want to buy a hammock, Mr. Andrews?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

That's right. I want to buy a hammock. Well, what's so strange about that?

[Archie Andrews]

Nothing. Not a thing at all.

[Mr. Higgins]

I have a dandy Hammock right here, Mr. Randalls. One of the last ones in stock and only $5.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Well, fine, I'll take it.

[Mr. Higgins]

All right. I'll carry it out to your car.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Thank you. You know, Lodge, I like doing business here. Mighty fine fellow, that Higgins.

[Archie Andrews]

Well, Jug, as long as I'm stuck with a hammock, I might as well lie in it. Give me one of those hooks. Hey, Now I'll screw it into this tree here. Won't take a minute.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

There.

[Archie Andrews]

Now the other hook in the other tree. Yeah, I'd rather lie in a hammock than go swimming any day.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

There.

[Archie Andrews]

Well, that's done. See how easy it is?

[Jughead]

Yeah, sure.

[Archie Andrews]

In fact, I'm very glad I thought of putting up a hammock.

[Jughead]

You thought of it, Archie?

[Archie Andrews]

Never mind, Jug. Hand me the hammock and I'll hang it. I'm anxious to see how it looks.

[Jughead]

Yeah.

[Archie Andrews]

Now I hang one end on this hook and the other end on the other end on. On. Well, gee whiz, Jughead, it doesn't reach gee whiz. This hammock's too small.

[Jughead]

Maybe the trees are too far apart.

[Archie Andrews]

Oh, for gosh sake, why didn't I think of measuring the distance before I rushed off and bought this thing? Now what'll we do?

[Jughead]

I could stand here and hold the other end.

[Archie Andrews]

No, that's no good. The termites would get you in one season. I know. I could sink a post into the ground and hang the other end on that.

[Jughead]

Yeah, I guess you could.

[Archie Andrews]

Sure, Jug. You know, sometimes I think I'm a genius. The rest of the time, I know it.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

You see, Andrews, that's all there is to it. Now that you got the two hooks in, you just hang the hammock on it.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Yes, Lodge, I sort of figured that out for myself. Hand me that hammock, will you? Thanks. Now I hang one end on this hook and the other on this hook. There. Now we're all set. Well, that was easy.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

I told you it would be.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Yes, Lodge. Well, now for the test bite. I'll hop right into it and what happened? I hit bottom. Oh, my gosh. It's resting right on the ground.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

That's because the trees are too close together.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Yes, Lodge, I could tell. Fine thing. Now what'll I do?

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Why, you could plant another tree.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Please, Lodge, don't be funny. I know, I know. I'll just sink a post into the ground and hang the hammock on that.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Andrews, if you study hard, you're gonna be a genius.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Never mind, Lodge. Oh, Mary.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Mary. Yes, dear?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Mary, would you bring out my saw?

[Veronica Lodge]

Your what?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

My saw.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

But Archie is using it, dear.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Arch. Oh, well, tell him I need it for a few minutes.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

All right. Archie. Archie, get bump. Archie, your father wants the saw. She wish Mama using it. Archie, your father needs it. Okay.

[Archie Andrews]

Where is he?

[Veronica Lodge]

On the other side of the house.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Okay, I'll send Jug over with it.

[Veronica Lodge]

All right, Fred.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Yes, Douglas.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Bringing the saw.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Okay, now let. Now let's see. I had some two by fours right here. They should make fine pulse. Wait a minute. That's funny. They're gone. What?

[Mr. Higgins]

Mary.

[Veronica Lodge]

Yes?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Have you seen those old two befores that were alongside the house?

[Veronica Lodge]

Yes, dear.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Where are they?

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Archie has them, Arch.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Now what in the world is he doing with them?

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

I haven't any idea.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Well, tell him I need a couple of them.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

All right.

[Jughead]

Here's the store, Mr. Andrews.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Huh? Oh. Oh, thank you, Jug.

[Jughead]

You're welcome. And Archie says let him know when you're finished with it, as I will.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Archie. Yes, Mom? Your father wants some of those two by fours. Gee, whit, what for? I have no idea. Well, tell him to send Jug back.

[Archie Andrews]

Here for the two by four.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

All right.

[Archie Andrews]

Fred.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Yes? Archie says to send Jug back.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Jug's already gone back. And tell him to hurry.

[Veronica Lodge]

All right, Archie.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Did y' all get there? Yes, Mom. So hurry and send those two by fours to your father. I already did, Pa. All right, dear.

[Jughead]

Here's those two by fours, Mr. Andrews.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Oh, fine, fine. That's fine, Jug.

[Jughead]

And Mr. Andrews.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Yes?

[Jughead]

Archie says if you need anything else, just hara.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Well, I. I guess that that post is. Is quite solid now.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Well, I don't know. Got to be real Strong.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

You know, Lodge, I said that. That. That post is solid now.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

All right, all right, Andrews. If you think it's solid, I won't contradict you.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Okay.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

After all, it doesn't matter to me if your hammock falls down.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Lodge, for gosh sakes, it's too hot to argue. Hot? That's funny.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

I don't feel hot.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Well, if I was just drinking cold lemonade by the gallon and standing in the shade looking important, well, I wouldn't be. Lodge, what is the shade doing over where you are?

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

I never touched it.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Good grief, the sun's moved. You can't hang a hammock right in the sun.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

No, not if you want it in the shade.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Well, for gosh sakes, I guess there's only one thing to do. I'll have to move the hammock to the front lawn. It's always shady there.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Good idea. Good idea.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Well, I'm certainly glad you approve. Yes, I guess it's the only thing to do. And as for these few holes I made in the lawn, why, they won't matter. They won't matter at all, will they?

[Archie Andrews]

Well, Jug, I guess we're ready now.

[Jughead]

Yeah, ready to collapse.

[Archie Andrews]

What are you tired about?

[Jughead]

You think it's easy running back and forth between you and your father?

[Archie Andrews]

What's he doing anyway?

[Jughead]

I don't know.

[Archie Andrews]

Well, he'll be surprised when I show him this. This. Gee whiz.

[Jughead]

What's the matter, Jug?

[Archie Andrews]

The shade is gone.

[Jughead]

Gee, so it is.

[Archie Andrews]

Jughead, do you know what happened?

[Jughead]

What?

[Archie Andrews]

The sun moved.

[Jughead]

It frequently does, Archie.

[Archie Andrews]

Gee whiz, Chug, why didn't you watch the sun?

[Jughead]

I've seen it before.

[Archie Andrews]

Very funny. Very funny. But now do you know what I gotta do?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

What?

[Archie Andrews]

Move this hammock around to the backyard. It's always shady there.

[Jughead]

Good idea.

[Archie Andrews]

And as for the few holes I dug here, they won't matter. Won't matter at all, will they?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Bring that shovel, Odds.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

I am, I am.

[Archie Andrews]

Bring that sword, Jug.

[Jughead]

I am, I am.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Well, hello, son. Still working?

[Archie Andrews]

Yes, dad, you too?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Yes, but I'm almost finished.

[Archie Andrews]

Me too. Well, see you later, dad.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Yeah, see you later, son.

[Archie Andrews]

Well, Jug, there it is. One hammock complete and ready for use.

[Jughead]

Oh, yeah. You look a little tired.

[Archie Andrews]

A little, Jug, Rigor mortis has already set in. The next time I decide to put up a hammock, put me in a straight jacket, will you?

[Jughead]

Okay.

[Archie Andrews]

That's nice of you. Thanks. But anyway, the job is done now, and I'm just.

[Veronica Lodge]

Hello, Archie.

[Archie Andrews]

Oh, hi, Betty.

[Jughead]

Hello, Betty.

[Veronica Lodge]

Hi, Jug. Well, was it fun? Archie?

[Archie Andrews]

It was what fun?

[Veronica Lodge]

Swimming at the lake.

[Archie Andrews]

Oh, that. I never went swimming.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Why not?

[Archie Andrews]

I decided to put up this hammock instead, fool that I am.

[Veronica Lodge]

A hammock? You decided to put up a hammock?

[Archie Andrews]

Well, yes. What's so strange about that? See here, it is a work of art, if I do say so myself.

[Veronica Lodge]

Well, yes, but.

[Archie Andrews]

And it took plenty of blood, sweat and tears, too. Betty, from now on, if anyone asks you, you tell them. For me, putting up a hammock is about the most difficult job in the world.

[Veronica Lodge]

Yes, but, Archie.

[Archie Andrews]

But it's finished now. And I intend to spend many a comfortable hour in it. And you can use it, too, Betty. Anytime it's empty, you can come right over and swing in this hammock.

[Veronica Lodge]

Yes, Archie, but why do you need two hammocks?

[Archie Andrews]

Oh, because everybody needs. Do you? Two hammocks? Betty, what are you talking about?

[Veronica Lodge]

You mean you don't know that your father just finished putting up a hammock.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

On the front lawn?

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, my goodness, he's fainted.

[Jughead]

Yeah, and not everybody can faint right into a hammock.

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, Archie. Archie, are you all right?

[Archie Andrews]

Where am I? In your hammock. Oh, don't say that word again, Jug. Betty, tell me, is it true what you said, my dad put up a hammock on the front lawn?

[Veronica Lodge]

Yes, it is, Archie.

[Archie Andrews]

Oh, well, we certainly don't need two hammocks. Jug, hand me that sledgehammer.

[Jughead]

What? Archie, you don't know.

[Archie Andrews]

Jug, give me the hammer. Thanks. Now, that's the end of that post.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

Oh, but, Archie, what will you hang the hammock on?

[Archie Andrews]

Now, Betty, I'm going to make you a present of this hammock. Here, take it.

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, but, Archie, your new hammock, I couldn't take that.

[Archie Andrews]

You've got to, Betty, as a favor to me. If my father sees it, I'd never hear the end of it.

[Veronica Lodge]

Well, all right, Archie, if you insist.

[Archie Andrews]

I do. And remember, you kids don't ever breathe a word of this to anyone.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Well, Archie, it's finally up there. It is a hammock.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Yes, we did a good job, even though I do have to say so myself.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

We. We. Lodge, how did you get into this?

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Well, now, you will admit, Andrews, that it was all my idea.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Now, listen, Lodge, if you think you can claim all the credit, why, you've got an.

[Veronica Lodge]

Hello, Miss Dangers.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Oh, hello, Veronica.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Hello, dear.

[Veronica Lodge]

What are you doing here, Father?

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Oh, just showing Mr. Andrews how to put up a hammock, dear.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

A hammock Lodge, for the last time, quit trying to take all the crap.

[Veronica Lodge]

Did you say a hammock?

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Andrews, I still insist. Without my help, you couldn't have put it up in a million years.

[Veronica Lodge]

But I thought Archie was going to put up the hammock.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

He was. Lodge, you didn't do a. Darling. And you. You. Veronica, what did you say?

[Veronica Lodge]

I said Archie was putting up a hammock. Wasn't he?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Was he? Oh, my gosh. I'll bet that's why. That's why I couldn't get the. Oh, my gosh. Did he?

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, I'm sure he did.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Oh, no.

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, yes.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Well, Andrews, I guess you now have two hammocks.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Two hammocks? Who needs two hammocks? Well, Lodge, there's only one thing to do. Hand me that axe.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

This one?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Yes, that one. Thank you. If I never hear that word hammock again, it'll be too soon.

[Jughead]

There.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Ah, that settles that.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Andrews, you've chopped the post down. Now what are you gonna hang the hammock on?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Lodge, I am making you a present of this hammock for your invaluable assistance. But.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

But, But I. I don't want to.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Take it, Lodge, with my blessing.

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, yes, Father. I'd love to have a hammock on our lawn.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Well, well, well, all right.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Thanks a lot, Andrew.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Don't mention it, please. And I have just one favor to ask of you and Veronica.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Yes?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Don't ever say a word about this to my family. I never live it down.

[Mr. Lodge (Veronica's Father)]

Oh, don't. Don't worry, Andrew. Don't worry. You can trust us. Well, let's go, Veronica.

[Veronica Lodge]

Bye, Mr. Andrews.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Goodbye. Goodbye.

[Archie Andrews]

Hello, dad.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

No, Archie. Hello, son. Oh, hello. You're good.

[Jughead]

Hello, Mr. Andrews.

[Archie Andrews]

Are you finished with your hammock? Dad?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Oh, yes, I. Hammock? Did you. Did you say hammock? Why, what hammock?

[Archie Andrews]

The one Betty said you were putting up.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Oh. Well, she must have been mistaken. You can see there's no hammock here. She. She must have meant your hammock.

[Archie Andrews]

My hammock? Oh, but you must be mistaken, Dad. I haven't any hammock.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Now what? Archie, tell me the truth. Did you or did you not put up a hammock?

[Archie Andrews]

Well, I. That is, I. Well, I don't have a hammock.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Now, Archie, answer my question.

[Archie Andrews]

Yes, dad.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

And you didn't. Archie, did you tear that hammock down?

[Archie Andrews]

Yes, dad.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Oh, how do these things happen to me? Of all the idiotic, imbecilic things I ever heard. Both of us Working all afternoon, spending all kinds of money, and then both tearing down the hammocks.

[Archie Andrews]

Ah, gee, now, gee whiz, dad. It's not my fault you bought a hammock, too, you know.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

It most certainly is your fault. Well, maybe it isn't entirely your fault.

[Archie Andrews]

Of course it isn't.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Well, look, son, I tell you what. Suppose we just forget the whole thing.

[Archie Andrews]

Forget it?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Yeah. Just. Just pretend the whole thing never happened. And above all, let's. Let's not say a word to your mother about this. We'd never hear the end of it.

[Archie Andrews]

Okay with me.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

You hear that, Jug?

[Jughead]

Yes, Mr. Andrews.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

And one thing more. I never want to hear the word hammock again.

[Archie Andrews]

Me too, dad.

[Veronica Lodge]

Oh, Brad. Brad.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Oh, hello, Mary. Where have you been?

[Veronica Lodge]

Out shopping. Hello, dear.

[Archie Andrews]

Hi, Mom.

[Veronica Lodge]

Well, did you two finish your work?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Work? Oh, yes, we did, Mary. Good.

[Veronica Lodge]

Well, I have a wonderful surprise for both of you.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Surprise?

[Veronica Lodge]

Yes, I got it at Higgins Hardware store. I'm sure you'll just love it. It has an iron stand and it's portable and you can put it almost anywhere.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Marry just what has an iron stand and is portable?

[Veronica Lodge]

Why, a hammer, dear.

[Mrs. Andrews (Archie's Mother)]

A portable hammock.

[Announcer]

You've been listening to another chapter of the Adventures of Archie Andrews, written by Carl Jampel and based on the copyrighted feature appearing in Archie Comics Magazine. Archie is played by Bob Hastings, Jughead by Harlan Stone. Others in the cast include Alice Yurman, Ian Martin, Gloria Mann and rosemary rice. Felix McGuire at the organ production was under the direction of Charles Urquhart.

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

And now back to the Andrews.

[Veronica Lodge]

Fred, for Pete's sakes, what's so funny?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

He broke his arm. Oh, my. He fell right out of the hammock and broke his arm.

[Veronica Lodge]

I don't see anything funny about that. Who broke his arm?

[Mr. Andrews (Archie's Father)]

Mr. Higgins, Mary. Mr. Higgins of the hardware stor.

[Announcer]

Listen next week for more of the Merry Adventures of Archie Andrews and his friends. And now, this is Bob Sherry wishing you a very pleasant weekend.

[Mr. Higgins]

So long.

[Announcer]

This is NBC, the National Broadcasting Company.