Podcast Summary: Harold's Old Time Radio - "Author! Author! 39-01-01 First Episode"

Release Date: July 23, 2025
Host: Harolds Old Time Radio
Episode Title: Author! Author! 39-01-01 First Episode

Introduction to "Author! Author!"

In the inaugural episode of "Author! Author!", hosted by Harold's Old Time Radio, listeners are introduced to an engaging literary game sponsored by the B.F. Goodrich Rubber Company. The show features distinguished authors—Carl Van Doren, Ellery Queen, Ogden Nash, and guest writer Marion Collins—who collaboratively invent story beginnings based on surprising endings submitted by the audience.

First Story Problem: The $2,001 Watch

Scene Setup (00:22 - 03:04):
The episode kicks off with a dramatization titled "The $2,001 Watch," set in Spiffin's renowned 5th Avenue jewelry store. A shabby-looking man attempts to purchase a platinum watch priced at $2,000 for just $1, causing a commotion.

Authors' Challenge:
The authors are tasked with creating a logical backstory that explains the man's audacious offer and the jeweler's unexpected acceptance.

Notable Contributions:

• Ogden Nash (03:27 - 04:48):
  Nash proposes that the man offering $1 is actually a rare coin collector, searching for a specific $1 American coin worth $5,000. His offer inadvertently supplies Mr. Spiffin with the elusive coin.
  Quote:
  "He’s one of those peculiar people, like stamp collectors, who collects coins... he noticed that the dollar… was a very rare coin." (03:51)

• Marion Collins (05:28 - 06:36):
  Collins introduces a layer of personal history, suggesting that Mr. Spiffin had borrowed $2,000 from the man, now seeking repayment through this unconventional transaction.
  Quote:
  "He had an old friend whom he approached for the capital… to put it like a jacket blurb on a book." (05:28)

• Ellery Queen (07:02 - 07:17):
  Queen challenges the ethical implications, questioning the disparity in the watch's valuation and suggesting ulterior motives behind the transaction.
  Quote:
  "He owed this man $2,000… but that watch didn’t cost him $2,000." (07:02)

• Carl Van Doren (07:20 - 08:34):
  Van Doren crafts a suspenseful narrative where Mr. Spiffin receives cryptic warnings about a kidnapping, leading him to interpret the man’s offer as a ransom plea.
  Quote:
  "He became convinced that this was the shabby customer…the way for him to communicate his willingness to pay whatever ransom." (07:20)

Interlude and Critique (08:37 - 09:19):
The authors engage in light-hearted banter, critiquing each other's stories and theories, adding humor and camaraderie to the segment.

Second Story Problem: Safe Motoring with Silvertown Tires

Scene Setup (10:43 - 11:57):
The next problem presents a rainy day scenario where Mr. Silver halts his car abruptly on a slippery road, assuring his neighbor of his safety.

Authors' Response:

• Carl Van Doren (11:34 - 11:41):
  Van Doren succinctly attributes Mr. Silver's confidence to the superior design of Silvertown tires.
  Quote:
  "Mr. Silver had Goodrich Silvertown tires on his car." (11:34)

This segment seamlessly integrates the sponsor's product, highlighting the safety and reliability of Silvertown tires through a practical example.

Third Story Problem: The Extraordinary Bequest

Scene Setup (12:07 - 13:01):
In a lawyer’s office, Mr. Chalmers reads a will that offers John Sutton the choice between inheriting a $10,000 estate or an empty envelope. Surprisingly, Sutton opts for the envelope.

Authors' Challenge:
Explain why Sutton would reject a substantial bequest in favor of an ostensibly worthless object.

Notable Contributions:

• Marion Collins (13:14 - 14:31):
  Collins crafts a heartfelt narrative where Mr. Sutton is coerced into choosing the envelope due to his tumultuous past with Mr. Black, including unethical business dealings and personal grudges.
  Quote:
  "Black has made it possible for me to take this money and enjoy life… or give it to the girl who really should have it." (13:14)

• Carl Van Doren (14:48 - 15:51):
  Van Doren introduces a twist involving Mr. Black's obsession with autograph collecting, revealing that the envelope contains a rare signature that could expose historical secrets about President Chester A. Arthur.
  Quote:
  "On the front it was addressed to Chester A. Arthur, President of the United States." (15:03)

• Ellery Queen (17:05 - 18:58):
  Queen devises a murder mystery wherein Mr. Sutton, a gambler, poisons his uncle Mr. Black using a tainted envelope, making the envelope both the key evidence and his only inheritance.
  Quote:
  "If he took the envelope, he would… destroy it because he was a pacifist… he simply refused the $10,000 and took the envelope." (17:05)

• Ogden Nash (19:03 - 20:29):
  Nash contributes an alternative explanation where the envelope contains a dangerous formula for poison gas, and Mr. Sutton’s pacifist ideals compel him to destroy it rather than risk global catastrophe.
  Quote:
  "He had invisible ink, the formula… a new and powerful poison gas…" (19:12)

Interlude and Interaction (20:35 - 22:16):
The authors interact with each other and engage in humorous exchanges, showcasing their personalities and the playful nature of the game.

Final Impromptu Story Problem: Centipede, Spot, Airplane to London Zoo

Scene Setup (22:16 - 23:15):
In a spontaneous twist, a rapid-fire story problem is presented: "A centipede, a spot, an airplane to London Zoo."

Authors' Attempt:

• Ogden Nash (22:28 - 22:58):
  Nash struggles humorously to connect the disparate elements, leading to a playful exchange rather than a coherent story.
  Quote:
  "Well, there it is. Mr. Nash, make a story out of that as quickly as you can." (22:28)

• Ellery Queen and Carl Van Doren (22:58 - 23:15):
  The authors respond with witty remarks, highlighting the challenge and maintaining the show's light-hearted atmosphere.

Audience Participation and Conclusion

Audience Engagement (20:42 - 21:50):
Host Jerry Lawrence invites listeners to submit their own story problems for a chance to have their scenarios crafted into stories by the authors, with cash prizes for selected entries.
Quote:
"Send your story problem… Each one accepted by us and used on this program will receive $25." (20:42)

Closing Remarks (23:14 - 23:38):
The episode concludes with a promotional segment for Silvertown tires, emphasizing their safety features, and a preview of the next episode featuring new guest authors.

Key Takeaways:

• Interactive Storytelling: The show uniquely blends interactive storytelling with audience participation, encouraging listeners to engage creatively.
• Product Integration: B.F. Goodrich Rubber Company's Silvertown tires are seamlessly woven into narratives, highlighting their safety and reliability.
• Distinguished Authors: Featuring renowned authors like Carl Van Doren, Ellery Queen, and Ogden Nash, the program offers rich literary content with engaging dynamics.
• Humorous and Educational: The blend of humor, suspense, and moral dilemmas makes the storytelling both entertaining and thought-provoking.

For listeners new to "Author! Author!", this episode serves as a captivating introduction to a literary game that challenges authors to create compelling narratives from unexpected story endings, all while promoting the safety and innovation of Silvertown tires.