Candy Matson 49-07-07 02 The Cable Car Case

Summary

Podcast Summary: Harold's Old Time Radio - Candy Matson 49-07-07 02: The Cable Car Case

Release Date: May 13, 2025

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Introduction

In this electrifying episode of "Candy Matson", listeners are plunged into the tumultuous streets of San Francisco, where Candy, a sharp-witted private detective, navigates a web of deceit, murder, and high-stakes investigation. "The Cable Car Case" masterfully blends suspense with classic radio drama elements, delivering a captivating story that keeps audiences on the edge of their seats.

Plot Overview

The episode opens with Candy Matson receiving a mysterious call urging her to abandon her involvement in the cable car business. Unfazed, Candy delves deeper, uncovering a sinister plot surrounding the murder of Dwight Ellsworth aboard a San Francisco cable car. As she pieces together the puzzle, Candy finds herself entangled in a dangerous game of cat and mouse, leading her to confrontations with unsuspected allies and formidable adversaries.

Key Characters

• Candy Matson: The protagonist, a tenacious private detective with a knack for getting to the truth.
• Rembrandt Watson: A quirky photographer and Candy's old friend, whose unpredictable behavior adds both comic relief and tension.
• Lt. Ray Mallard: A police lieutenant who is both an ally and a source of contention for Candy.
• Mrs. Ellsworth: The sophisticated yet ruthless wife of the murdered Dwight Ellsworth, harboring dark secrets.

Detailed Summary

The Murder on the Cable Car (00:09 - 05:24)

The episode kicks off with Candy on a cable car journey, where she witnesses the shocking murder of Dwight Ellsworth. Attempting to blend in, she engages in conversation with her companion, whom she later identifies as Lt. Ray Mallard. The interaction raises suspicions about Candy's involvement, prompting Mallard to question her integrity.

Candy Matson [00:22]: "She sure is sweet. She's Candy Matson. Like to meet her."

Lt. Ray Mallard [05:07]: "He looks like the advance man for Lewis and Clark."

Confrontation and Alliance (05:24 - 15:22)

Determined to clear her name and solve the murder, Candy reaches out to her friend Rembrandt Watson for assistance. Their partnership is immediately tested as they navigate through misleading clues and confrontations with law enforcement.

Candy Matson [08:02]: "What gives? You're in on something and I want to know about it."

Rembrandt Watson [14:10]: "I'm looking right at you, Candy."

Investigation and Deception (15:22 - 26:52)

Candy's investigation leads her to Mrs. Ellsworth, who cunningly accepts her offer to pay for the investigation, masking her own motives. As Candy delves deeper, she uncovers a conspiracy involving the sabotage of the South Sea Island Steamship Company. The plot thickens as Candy realizes the extent of Mrs. Ellsworth's deceit and the lengths she's willing to go to seize control of the company.

Candy Matson [26:05]: "The South Sea Island Steamship Lines were slowly being sabotaged."

Mrs. Ellsworth [14:07]: "I'm not in the mood. Just make it a double."

Climax and Resolution (26:52 - 29:18)

In a dramatic climax, Candy confronts Mrs. Ellsworth, leading to a showdown that results in Mrs. Ellsworth's demise. The intertwined relationships and betrayals reach their peak as Candy reflects on the tangled web she's navigated. The episode concludes with Candy mending her relationship with Lt. Mallard, hinting at future collaborations and unresolved tensions.

Candy Matson [28:12]: "Listen in again to the further adventures of Candy Matson. Girl sucker."

Candy Matson [29:08]: "You know, at times it's kind of fun to be in the arms of the law."

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Candy Matson [00:22]: "She sure is sweet. She's Candy Matson. Like to meet her."

• Lt. Ray Mallard [05:07]: "He looks like the advance man for Lewis and Clark."

• Candy Matson [08:02]: "What gives? You're in on something and I want to know about it."

• Rembrandt Watson [14:10]: "I'm looking right at you, Candy."

• Candy Matson [26:05]: "The South Sea Island Steamship Lines were slowly being sabotaged."

• Mrs. Ellsworth [14:07]: "I'm not in the mood. Just make it a double."

• Candy Matson [28:12]: "Listen in again to the further adventures of Candy Matson. Girl sucker."

• Candy Matson [29:08]: "You know, at times it's kind of fun to be in the arms of the law."

Conclusion

The Cable Car Case serves as a quintessential episode of the Candy Matson series, encapsulating the essence of Golden Age radio dramas. Through sharp dialogue, intricate plotting, and vibrant characters, the episode delivers a memorable narrative that resonates with both long-time fans and new listeners alike. As Candy Matson continues her quest for justice, audiences are left eagerly anticipating her next adventure.

Transcript

[Candy Matson]

Hello, Yukon 28209? Yes, this is Candy Matson.

[Narrator]

Do you have a little unsolved murder in your home? Got some blackmail you want to unload? Are you the victim of some vulgar extortionist? I know a girl you should meet. She may not be the greatest private eye in the world. So what if it does cost you 3 or $400? She sure is sweet. She's Candy Matson. Like to meet her.

[Candy Matson]

Hello, Candy Matson? Well, I wasn't sure when I looked in the mirror this morning.

[Unknown]

Had a rough night, eh?

[Candy Matson]

Oh, there have been rougher ones. Look, voice, before you get caught with my receiver down. Who are you and what do you want?

[Unknown]

As to who I am, you'll find out very shortly. What I want is you.

[Candy Matson]

How romantic. And over the phone.

[Unknown]

Yeah, let me finish. What I want is you to lay off that cable car business.

[Candy Matson]

Oh, that. Well, I'm afraid I can't. You see, I was sitting beside him when they discovered his transfer had been punched. Sort of permanently. That's how things happen with me. I get into the craziest routines. You see, I used to be a model. I've been told I have the proper displacement for such a career. But I found there wasn't enough money in it. A girl has to maintain a nice apartment on Telegraph Hill keep enough clothes to highlight the displacement I mentioned and also eat, doesn't she? Sure. So I turned private eye. You meet a better class of people. Mostly named Rigger or Mortis. Now, take this cable car deal. It's positively fantastic. But after all, this is radio, isn't it? Like to hear how the whole thing happened? Leave us trip along to Act 1. I wanted to get downtown that morning, but I couldn't take the F car. They were ripping up about 87 streets, which is par for the course. So I walked down Telegraph Hill and up to Mason. That's where the Bay and Powell cable car stopped.

[Lt. Ray Mallard]

All aboard. Come on, Lana, show that shapely ankle. We gotta make the Fairmont by Whitsuntide.

[Candy Matson]

The car was loaded and so was the character next to me. I tried to budge into the seat between him and a Fisherman's Wharf dowager, but I couldn't quite make it. I'd forgotten my shoehorn. Say, pardon me, but would you mind reading your Wall Street Journal over that a way a bit. I'd like to sit in here.

[Bartender]

Oh, if you insist.

[Candy Matson]

A night of old. He budged his hips a quarter of an inch and I slipped in, ready for my rocket ride over the hill and down into town. The trip, as usual, was uneventful. Three smashed fenders and several choice words I'd never heard before. But I wrote him down. By the time our prairie schooner reached the turntable at Market street, the crowd on the car thinned out, but Buster was still beside me, his head buried in common and preferred Market Street. I started to get down.

[Lt. Ray Mallard]

Hey, lady, take your boyfriend with you. We're heading back up the hill.

[Candy Matson]

Boyfriend? I'll sue. He looks like the advance man for Lewis and Clark.

[Lt. Ray Mallard]

How do you like that? He fell asleep over his stocks and bonds.

[Candy Matson]

I looked again. Hipsy wasn't asleep. Hipsy was stone cold dead on Market. What a twist. I, who always went on the prowl for a whodunit, got one literally tossed into my lap. He just hadn't gone out of this world serene like. Oh, no. There was a steady slurp, slurp of blood trickling down his vest just north by northeast of the equator. After a half hour wait full of questioning by homicide leg men, I knew my morning shopping tour was rained out. And after all, I was only going to buy an emerald clip to match the glint in my eye. Well, that would have to wait. I knew the next step. I grabbed a cab home. I wasn't long in waiting. Right on cue. And if it was the right cue, it would be Lt. Ray Mallard from headquarters, daintily pressing his cuticles against my apartment buzzer. I was right.

[Rembrandt Watson]

What?

[Candy Matson]

I've been expecting you. Come on in, Mellard.

[Rembrandt Watson]

You've been expecting me? Why, Candy.

[Candy Matson]

Naive little rover boy. You have a drink?

[Rembrandt Watson]

No, no, I'm not in the mood. Just make it a double.

[Candy Matson]

Sit down, Meller. Let's be civilized. Take off your hat.

[Rembrandt Watson]

It is off.

[Candy Matson]

Oh.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Candy, for once I'm puzzled.

[Candy Matson]

You're just saying that.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Yeah, because it's true. I've checked and rechecked. No matter how many loose ends I tie together, I still get no connection between you and Dwight Ellsworth.

[Candy Matson]

Dwight?

[Rembrandt Watson]

Who's worth Ellsworth? Your extremely limp traveling companion on the cable this morning.

[Candy Matson]

Mallard, I can give you an angle on that.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Yeah?

[Candy Matson]

Yeah. The angle being that I didn't know him from Adam Level straight. Oh, look, honey pot, this mediocre dialogue is getting us nowhere. What did you haul your size 11's in here for?

[Rembrandt Watson]

Oh, frankly, I don't know. Here, fill it up, will you?

[Candy Matson]

Well, you're not just going around in circles, Mallard. You're going around in doubles.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Yeah, yeah. Like I've said before, Candy, you've got a Pretty view from here.

[Candy Matson]

Oh, wait till I turn around.

[Rembrandt Watson]

I mean from your window. Look at that ship down there just docking.

[Candy Matson]

Hmm. Where?

[Rembrandt Watson]

Down there. There's romance for you. Probably just in from the Far East.

[Candy Matson]

Here's your drink.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Oh, thanks.

[Candy Matson]

You know, it is sort of romantic. Don't you think it'd be fun to jump on a tramp like that and whisk off to the South Seas? Hmm? On a honeymoon.

[Rembrandt Watson]

No.

[Candy Matson]

That's what I thought. South Seas, Mallard.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Don't call me Mallard.

[Candy Matson]

Why not? We're just playing for ducks, aren't we?

[Rembrandt Watson]

Ah, very crisp. Playing for ducks. No, Candy, we aren't. Not in this case. We've got a dead man on our hands. Rudy. Toot. Toot. Shot right through the heart. And you were sitting next to him.

[Candy Matson]

Sure, sure. Go on now, get out of here.

[Rembrandt Watson]

What?

[Candy Matson]

You heard me. Lift your hindquarters and get back to headquarters.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Candy, I don't like that look. You've got something on your mind.

[Candy Matson]

Yeah, yeah, but you wouldn't recognize it if I told you about it.

[Rembrandt Watson]

One word of warning. Don't dabble. You're in deep enough. Got it?

[Candy Matson]

Got it. Here's your hat. Grab it. So long, Mallard. See you around a jailhouse sometime. Fi Foo. Fum. Twas then I smelled a big fat fee. That great big kind of attractive Mallard. He missed the boat. Oh, he saw it, but he missed it. It was that ship he saw docking. That was the first time I came out of the dark since my Tunerville ride down the hill in the morning. I needed help, so I called an old friend of mine. If you can call that help. Rembrandt Watson was his name. He was a photographer. And other things. He spent most of his life in the dark room, dabbling with bottles. His negatives and prints were sharp, his thought processes not quite. But he'd given me assistance in the past, so I called him.

[Unknown]

Rembrandt Watson. Speaking. Photography, portraits and camera work.

[Candy Matson]

Yes, Rembrandt, I know.

[Unknown]

Also available for gardening, janitorial service and babysitting.

[Candy Matson]

Rembrandt, it's candy.

[Unknown]

Especially at the over 21. Oh, candy.

[Candy Matson]

Now you're tuned in.

[Unknown]

How dare you? Baggage. I was experimenting with a new type of formula.

[Candy Matson]

90 proof for a hundred.

[Unknown]

A hundred and candy. It works beautifully. There's a delightful little pixie in a pink ballet skirt in my living room.

[Candy Matson]

Well, leave her there and get over here immediately to my place. Take a cab. I'll pay for it.

[Unknown]

I'd much rather have a handsome carriage With a brace of chestnuts.

[Candy Matson]

You've got them in your head. Now, just do as I say and get over here. Float in Rembrandt Gadfree.

[Unknown]

Where's the man to take me? Cloak, gloves and topper.

[Candy Matson]

You're wearing a sport coat and slack and you know I have no man.

[Unknown]

And therein lies your basic trouble, my dear. You have no man. Now, Rembrandt, every man should have a woman. Every woman should have a man. It's the incontrovertible law of the universe, Candy. You should have a man. You sure I'm no longer a man. I'm a sprite transcending the world.

[Candy Matson]

Well, stop transcending a moment and come down to earth. We've got a job to do.

[Unknown]

How poetic. How idyllic. We've got a job to do for money, eventually. Oh, one of those. Very well, my dear. Bring me up to date.

[Candy Matson]

Well, I. I don't really know if I can or not.

[Unknown]

Good. Then I shall leave and return to me formula.

[Candy Matson]

Oh, no. What I mean is, the whole story's so fantastic, you never believe it.

[Unknown]

I might. Try me, Candy.

[Candy Matson]

Well, I get on a cable car and sit next to a character reading the Wall Street Journal.

[Unknown]

A strange coupling. A cable car in the Wall Street Journal?

[Candy Matson]

Yeah, and when we get to the end of the line, my friend next to me is dead.

[Unknown]

Probably the ride down the hill frightened him to death.

[Candy Matson]

He looked like a used punch board. He had a neat little bullet hole through his heart.

[Unknown]

Candy, my little ballerina friend in the pink skirt is more believable than what you just told me.

[Candy Matson]

I told you was fantastic, but none the how it happened. Now, sooner or later, Mallard is going to come out of his fog, and when he does, I'm going to be out of a fee.

[Unknown]

A fee that so far doesn't exist, my pretty.

[Candy Matson]

It will, if my hunch is right. Now, here's what I want you to do. Go down to the Chronicle and get all the back files you can on Southern Island Steamship Company.

[Unknown]

The Chronicle. A pleasure. I have a few questionable companions there who indulge in formulas.

[Candy Matson]

Stay away from those companions and just do as I ask.

[Unknown]

Very well, my dove. I go, but entirely against my will. And where will you be?

[Candy Matson]

Around town, Rembrandt. I've got to do some legwork.

[Unknown]

Let me assure you, Candy, you have just the right equipment for it, too.

[Candy Matson]

What a joint. I'll bet they mount slit gullets on the walls instead of deer heads. Well, come on, Candy. Get your tools out and screw up your courage.

[Bartender]

Yeah, Miss, What'll it be?

[Candy Matson]

Nothing right at the moment except information.

[Bartender]

Information? Water. Both free. What do you want to know?

[Candy Matson]

Well, I'm looking for the purser off of Dwight Sonia. I hear he does his shore duty in here.

[Bartender]

That's right. Name? Campbell. That head on the table over there belongs to him.

[Candy Matson]

Thanks. Hello, sailor. Hey, Campbell, wake up.

[Unknown]

Leave me alone.

[Candy Matson]

Come on, snap out of it.

[Unknown]

Who are you? What do you want?

[Candy Matson]

My name is Candy Mattson. I want to ask a question.

[Unknown]

I'm only drinking away.

[Candy Matson]

Not until I find out what I want to know. Dwight Ellsworth was murdered this morning.

[Unknown]

What?

[Candy Matson]

I thought that would bring you to.

[Unknown]

Well, that's the nicest news I've heard since VJ Day. What do you want to know?

[Candy Matson]

Where does his brother live?

[Unknown]

That stooge? He's got about as much spine as a water eel.

[Candy Matson]

Never mind. I want to find him. He seems to keep his whereabouts as secret as an atomic stockpile.

[Unknown]

The whole family ought to be knocked off. He lives out in Seacliffe. 25 Dashiell Road.

[Candy Matson]

Good bartender. Buy my friend a little reward. And one for yourself, too. Well, so far so good. Oh, how did I know about Campbell, the purser? Well, you see, I have quite a few friends. Most of whom my pal Mallard doesn't approve. So I grabbed the cab and navigated the driver out towards Seclin. It was so foggy I couldn't see the meter. But I paid him anyway, gave him a neutral tip and dismissed him. There it was, 25 Dashiell Road. An austere looking cabana. One that dared you to ring the front doorbell. I dared. I had the awful feeling I should have been around at the side door delivering hand laundry.

[Mrs. Ellsworth]

Good evening.

[Candy Matson]

Except for the fog. Yes? Is Mr. Ellsworth in?

[Mrs. Ellsworth]

Yes, he is, but I'm afraid I must ask you to leave.

[Candy Matson]

There.

[Mrs. Ellsworth]

There's been a death in the family.

[Candy Matson]

I know. That's why I'm here.

[Mrs. Ellsworth]

Come in, please.

[Candy Matson]

Thank you.

[Mrs. Ellsworth]

Walk this way, please.

[Candy Matson]

Oh, I'm afraid I couldn't, even if I lived to be a hundred.

[Mrs. Ellsworth]

Mind your tongue, young lady. You're in the house of an Ellsworth.

[Candy Matson]

Oh, hoity toity. The old babe had delusions of grandeur. Well, no need to get uppity with me. I've mingled with royalty. I once played a bit part in a Rita Hayworth picture. But this old gal was really something. She couldn't have been more than 45, yet looked like something out of the Barrett of Wimpole Street. She ushered me Into a large ceiling living room. And there on the divan was my boy. His head lowered into his hands and quite obviously touched. Quite obviously.

[Mrs. Ellsworth]

Roger, this young lady is here to see you. I don't believe you mentioned your name.

[Candy Matson]

Candy Matson.

[Bartender]

Matson. You in shipping too?

[Candy Matson]

Of a sort.

[Bartender]

Oh, this is my wife, Miss Matson. You'll pardon me if I don't seem hospitable, but my brother was murdered this morning.

[Candy Matson]

I know. I was sitting next to him when it happened.

[Rembrandt Watson]

You were?

[Mrs. Ellsworth]

Don't talk to her, Roger. I don't trust her. This whole thing is a threat of some kind.

[Candy Matson]

No, it's not a threat threat. It's a business proposition. I'll come right to the point. You see, I'm a private detective.

[Mrs. Ellsworth]

Oh, one of those persons.

[Candy Matson]

Put your nose back down, Mrs. Ellsworth. I want to get the show on the road. Yes, I'm a private detective and I'm in a spot too. The police think I'm connected with the case in some way. So I'm here for a double purpose.

[Bartender]

I'm listening, Ms. Matson.

[Mrs. Ellsworth]

Roger, I forbid you to speak with this. This woman.

[Candy Matson]

Too late, Mrs. Ellsworth. Now this is it. I'm in this business to make money. Give me a check now for $300 and I'll find out who killed your brother. And I'll also clear myself.

[Mrs. Ellsworth]

Roger, I'm warning you.

[Candy Matson]

Naturally, you want to see the killer of your brother brought to justice, don't you, Mr. Ellsworth? Don't you?

[Rembrandt Watson]

I. Yes, yes.

[Bartender]

Here, I'll make a checkout right now.

[Candy Matson]

Thank you. Just make it out to Candy Metson. Payable today. A lovely collection of guns you have, Mr. Elsworth. You hunt much?

[Bartender]

Oh, yes. Yes, my wife and I are quite fond of shooting. She's an excellent shot. There you are.

[Candy Matson]

Thank you. I'll be in touch with you sometime tomorrow. Mr. Reed didn't say a word. She just stood there against the fireplace and shot sparks through me. After I waved the check in the air a few times to dry the ink, she showed me to the door.

[Mrs. Ellsworth]

Very clever, aren't you? Taking advantage of a weak willed man.

[Candy Matson]

I wonder who made him that way.

[Mrs. Ellsworth]

Don't cash that cheque. I mean it.

[Candy Matson]

Don't cash that cheque, Mrs. Ellsworth. $300. I need the money badly. I need some new rolls for my player piano. I buzzed back downtown. I wanted to cash that check in a hurry. I knew of only one person who would give me the crisp green at that hour of the night. Uncle Charlie. The honest miller who ran the Chase Room. Uncle Charlie, in the strict sense of the word, was a gentleman. So with a tender little pat on my cheek, he cashed the check and I went up Telegraph Hill and home. All of a sudden, my eyes did a couple of inverted loops. Oh, my lights were on. Who's in here? All right, speak up.

[Unknown]

Oh, Candy, the light of my life. Come join our party.

[Candy Matson]

Oh, Rembrandt, you gave me a scare.

[Rembrandt Watson]

You don't scare easy either, Candy. Got something on your mind?

[Candy Matson]

And Mallard. Well, how ducky. A midnight soiree. What goes on here?

[Rembrandt Watson]

Well, that chicken you had in the icebox is delicious.

[Candy Matson]

Was delicious. Looks like you've done everything but eat the bones.

[Unknown]

Your village is superb, too, Candy. Have a little formula.

[Candy Matson]

No. Now, come on. What gives?

[Rembrandt Watson]

That's my line, Candy. What gives? You're in on something and I want to know about it.

[Candy Matson]

Oh, Mellard, believe me, it's nothing. I'm just trying to parley a couple of hunches.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Tall hunches. Look at all those clippings on the South Sea Island Steamship Company. What are they for?

[Unknown]

I meant to tell you, Candy, I had remarkable success down at the Chronicle. There's everything you want on that steamship line.

[Candy Matson]

Oh, Rembrandt, did you have to tell the whole world?

[Unknown]

Candy, you chide me unnecessarily. I merely had the clippings on the table when Hawkshaw here walks in on me.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Okay, Candy, take it from there.

[Candy Matson]

I can't tell you yet, Mallard. Nothing makes sense yet. I've got about four loose ends that need tying off.

[Rembrandt Watson]

I'd only put two men to following you. I'd save myself a lot of grief.

[Candy Matson]

Two days, that's all, Mallard. Just give me two days. I think I'll have it for you all right.

[Rembrandt Watson]

But don't forget, the boys down at Kearney street headquarters don't love you the way I do. Two days. No more or less. I gotta go. Thanks for the foul chicken.

[Candy Matson]

Ah, very gay. Here, Rembrandt, here's $50 for you. 50?

[Unknown]

My word. What's all this talk about a recession?

[Candy Matson]

Go on and take it. Go someplace and stabilize the. I whipped through the old newspaper clipping. It was all there. Fire at sea on Ellsworth ship. Two seamen lost off Ellsworth ship near Honolulu. South Sea Island Line. Ship loses rudder in storm. On and on it went, over a period of three years. I threw the papers back on the table, helped myself to some of Rembrandt's formula, turned down the lights and went out on the porch. The bay was dark except for an occasional path of light from a passing freighter. I sat down to think and think. Then, quick, quick, just like that, two little tumblers in my mind fell into place. Only one thing to do, and that was to do it the hard way. The next morning, just as the Ferry Building siren was announcing 8 o' clock to downtown San Francisco, I got Rembrandt on the phone.

[Unknown]

Candy, what on earth are you calling me for at this hour?

[Candy Matson]

Can't help it. There's work to be done.

[Unknown]

I did my work last night so extremely well that I'm just going to. Going to bed now.

[Candy Matson]

Sorry, you'll just have to delay your sack time. Meet me at the corner of Mason and Union in 10 minutes, right where the cable car stops.

[Narrator]

Now what are we going to do?

[Candy Matson]

We're going to take a cable car ride. What?

[Unknown]

One of those bouncing jerky little contraptions? Not the way I feel this morning.

[Candy Matson]

Oh, yes, you are. Union and Mason in 10 minutes. All right, Rembrandt, get on.

[Unknown]

This is the silliest thing you've ever done, Candy.

[Candy Matson]

Maybe. We'll see. Dwight Ellsworth was already on the car when I got on. Here and alive.

[Unknown]

How could you tell?

[Candy Matson]

He mumbled something when I asked him to move over.

[Unknown]

Sounds logical. Although I once remember stumbling into a corpse who mumbled for hours after he'd been liquigated.

[Candy Matson]

Rembrandt was in one of his rambling moods, so I let him alone. The car pulled over Mason street, down Washington, and then swung on to Powell and up the hill. Now I watched the buildings and apartments carefully. There was a little red brick building now a big apartment house, a woman's residence club and so on. Then over the hill, more apartments. And the possibilities petered out at Bush. Well, only one thing to do. Canvass all those blocks between Washington and Bush. Okay, Rembrandt, off the car.

[Unknown]

Strangest corpse I ever did see. What did you say?

[Candy Matson]

Candy, off the car. Come on.

[Unknown]

Now What? I just want to get to bed.

[Candy Matson]

Well, not for a long time, Boy Blue. Now here's the pitch. You take this building and I'll take the next. We'll alternate as we go along. Ask if a tall woman with a horsey face and dressed something like Queen Victoria ever lived around here. Oh, Candy, I know it sounds wild, but it's got to be done.

[Unknown]

A horse with a tall face and dressed something like.

[Candy Matson]

Oh, Rembrandt, look at me. Get that smoke out of your brain. A tall woman with a horsey face. And dressed something like Queen Victoria. You got it? Got it. Okay, get going. It was slow and tiresome and the answers I got a tall gal dressed like Queen Victoria. Oh, sister, that was about par.

[Bartender]

No, nobody like that ever lived here.

[Candy Matson]

Are you positive?

[Bartender]

A dame who fits that description? Yeah, I'm positive.

[Candy Matson]

The morning wore on and so did we. We were over on the other side of California street now. So we stopped and had a bite to eat. I had pickles with mine and Rembrandt had olives on toothpicks in a glass. And again we picked up the hunt. My heart was suddenly making with a Roomba. There, just on the other side of clay, in front of a three story red brick house, was a police squad car. There was a little knot of people gathered around. Daintily lifting my crinoline, I did a Mel Patton down the block and up the front steps. I didn't have any trouble finding the room. The door was wide open and there was a body on the floor. Four representatives of the law were buzzing back and forth. One of the buzzies was Mallard.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Well, my little ambassador of violence, why is it you're always around the extremely dead?

[Candy Matson]

Candy, I've got no time to brandy the ad libs. Mallard. Who is it?

[Rembrandt Watson]

I don't know yet. No identification.

[Candy Matson]

Let me see.

[Rembrandt Watson]

A pen pal.

[Candy Matson]

Maybe I was right. I knew it.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Knew it. Knew what?

[Candy Matson]

You're right. He was a pen pal. He wrote me a check last night for $300. His name is Roger Ellsworth.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Very interesting. Must be open season on Ellsworth. Okay, Candy, time you filled in in the blanks. Start.

[Candy Matson]

Wait a minute. I want to look at the window over here. Mm. Mallard, there are a couple of younger Ellsworths living around town here. I'm sure you'd like to see them. Stay healthy.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Yeah.

[Candy Matson]

Get out to 25 Dashiell Road and pick up an old crone also named Ellsworth. Five will get you 20. She's the one you're after.

[Rembrandt Watson]

All right. But you get back to your place and stay put, understand? I want to have a more illuminating chat with you.

[Candy Matson]

Oh, Mallard, I'm just like putty in your hands. The moon was coming up over Diablo and spraying a path of silver on the bay. Still no Mallard. I wondered what could be wrong. Well, this was it. This was the showdown.

[Unknown]

You seen a tall face with a horsey woman, a. Andy, I'm so mad at you, I could. Oh, what's the use?

[Candy Matson]

Now what's the matter?

[Unknown]

What's the Matter, she says. I've been roving all over Powell street, ringing doorbells. Where did you go, you traitor?

[Candy Matson]

Brad, I'm sorry. In the excitement I forgot all about you.

[Unknown]

What excitement?

[Candy Matson]

There's been another murder.

[Unknown]

In a moment there's going to be another. I'm looking right at you, Candy.

[Candy Matson]

Cool off, have some formula and stop snorting steam. What was that?

[Unknown]

Your window, Candy. It just shattered.

[Narrator]

What?

[Candy Matson]

Wait a minute. That window didn't shatter by itself. Quick, get the lights. Rembrandt. Now duck down here.

[Rembrandt Watson]

What sort of a silly game are we playing now?

[Candy Matson]

This isn't a game, believe me.

[Lt. Ray Mallard]

Sandy. Sandy, are you all right?

[Unknown]

Yikes, it's the gumshoe.

[Candy Matson]

Yes, I'm all right. Where are you, Mallard?

[Lt. Ray Mallard]

Over here. Two houses over. We've got your girlfriend trapped on the roof next to you. Don't move and stay covered.

[Candy Matson]

Okay?

[Lt. Ray Mallard]

All right, Mrs. Ellsworth. Are you coming down peacefully or do we have to play cops and robbers?

[Roger Ellsworth]

I'm not coming down until I get that candy. Max, she did it. She bossed me to kill my own brother in law.

[Lt. Ray Mallard]

Have it your own way. Okay, loosen her up a bit, boys.

[Unknown]

Better than the Fourth of July.

[Candy Matson]

Keep your head down, Rembrandt.

[Unknown]

Oh, is that what was up?

[Lt. Ray Mallard]

Ready to come down, Mrs. Ellsworth?

[Roger Ellsworth]

No, I'm not that hateful woman. She's ruined my whole life, all my plans, just because of her snooping and prying. She's going to die, I tell you.

[Rembrandt Watson]

It was a miracle. Candy, you must have moved slightly just as she shot at you.

[Candy Matson]

Well, it was too close, I can tell you. She's dead?

[Rembrandt Watson]

Oh, decidedly. I think she was dead before she hit the ground. That one shot got her. We went out to her house and she was just driving off when we got there. We trailed her up to north beach, lost her for a block and then spotted a car at the top of the hill here. We arrived just as she was getting on the roof next door. Okay, now you tell me your little dream.

[Candy Matson]

Well, it was that ship docking that set my wheels going around. The name Ellsworth started burning in back somewhere. You saw the clippings we dug up. The South Sea Island Steamship Lines were slowly being sabotaged. I did some checking and I. I found that the insurance companies weren't going to renew.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Yeah, I don't know why I didn't tie that in sooner.

[Candy Matson]

Oh, it's just that you have too many things on your mind, Mallard dear. I went out to the place on Dashiell Road and when I left I was pretty sure the old girl had knocked off her brother in law.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Why?

[Candy Matson]

Well, for several reasons. One, she was a venomous old witch. Two, you've never seen such a collection of guns in all your life. And her husband admitted she was a darn good shot. I also saw one little pot gun that was very interesting. It had a silencer on it.

[Rembrandt Watson]

That was the one she used on you tonight.

[Candy Matson]

And also the one she used on Dwight Ellsworth from the window of that apartment where you found her husband.

[Rembrandt Watson]

How do you know?

[Candy Matson]

Go back there. You'll see a nice little bullet hole in the curtain with burned powder all around it.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Now, don't tell me that.

[Candy Matson]

Yes, I'm telling you that. She rented that place knowing that her brother in law always went downtown on a certain cable car. She waited that morning until we were riding by and she plugged him.

[Rembrandt Watson]

I have now heard everything.

[Candy Matson]

And the reason? Dwight Ellsworth, rather than fighting the insurance companies, had decided to sell his steamship line. But the old gal thought she'd beat him to the punch by knocking him off. The steamship company would then fall into her husband's hands.

[Rembrandt Watson]

What about her husband?

[Candy Matson]

After he gave me the check and I left, they evidently had a fearful row and she spilled the beans. Somehow she lured him down to that place on Powell and gave him some lead poisoning to. And that's all there is to it.

[Rembrandt Watson]

Candy, I wish you'd have told me all these things earlier. We might have been able to save the life of Roger Ellsworth.

[Candy Matson]

It wouldn't do any good. Because if she hadn't killed him, I was going to.

[Rembrandt Watson]

What?

[Candy Matson]

Mm. While I was waiting for you to get here, the phone rang. It was Uncle Charlie, the honest Miller, that no good Roger Ellsworth. His check bounced like a brand new golf ball. What's so funny, Mallard?

[Rembrandt Watson]

Listen in again to the further adventures of Candy Matson. Girl sucker.

[Candy Matson]

Well, that's the way it goes. Sometimes you win, sometimes you don't. In this case, nobody did. Except Rembrandt. He'd stocked his darkroom with $50 worth of formula. And not the kind you use on negatives either. See? Murder on a Cable Car. Dwight and Roger Ellsworth done in as well as the old gal. One check that bounced. It really does sound fantastic, doesn't it? But I told you this was radio, didn't I? Oh, wait a minute. Maybe I did come out ahead at that. On the way out, Mallard leaned on and kissed me. The first time it ever happened. You know, at times it kind of fun to be in the arms of the law.

[Narrator]

Listen again next week at the same time. For excitement and adventure, just dial.

[Candy Matson]

Candy Matson, UConn 28209.

[Narrator]

Heard tonight were Helen Kleeb, Jack Cahill and Harry Bechtel, Jack Thomas as Rembrandt and Henry Leff as Mallard. The program stars Natalie Masters as Candy and is written and produced by Monty Masters. This has been a presentation of NBC, the National Broadcasting Company.