
Continental Celebrity Club 46-02-23 (12) Guest - Linda Darnell
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Nicole Fire
We interrupt this program to bring you an important Wayfair message. Wayfair's got style tips for every home. This is Nicole Fire helping you make those rooms flyer. Today's style tip when it comes to making a statement, treat bold patterns like neutrals. Go wild like an untamed animal. Print area rug under a rustic farmhouse table. From wayfair.com Ooh. Fierce. This has been your Wayfair style tip to keep those interiors superior.
Wayfair Voice
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Jackie Kelp
The Continental Celebrity Club Celebrity Club Celebrity Club. The Continental Can Company presents the Continental Celebrity Club with our own young comedy star, Jackie Kelp. The songs of Margaret Whiting, the music of Ray Block's orchestra, and as our special guest this week, the beautiful and lovely Hollywood star, Linda Darnell.
John Daly
And here is your host, John Daly. Thank you Bill Cullen and good evening everyone. Margaret Whiting takes the new song hit from the picture Road to Utopia to open tonight's festivities. The personable Ms. Whiting and personality.
Wayfair Voice
Mary Smith had a college education Sally Jones.
Jackie Kelp
Had a scientific.
Wayfair Voice
Susie Brown used to lecture on ancient architecture Josie Green spoke Latin and Green just forgotten girls with forgotten brains While history explains When Madame Pompadour was on a balloon floor said all the gentlemen obviously the madam head the cutest personality and think of all the books about the Berry's look what was it made her the toaster Parade her the Toaster Parade her the toaster Parade. She had a well developed personality and what did Romeo see in Juliet or Pierrot in Pierrot or Jupiter in Juno you know and when Salome danced and had the boys entranced no doubt it must have been easy to see that she knew how to use her personality. So don't you say I'm smart and have the kindest heart oh what a wonderful sister I'd be. Just tell me how you like my personality.
Jackie Kelp
Friends, you are listening to the Continental Celebrity Club brought to you by the Continental Can Company. Makers of cans of paper and fiber, containers of bottle caps and of plastics for home and industry plastics for radio cabinets, electric shavers and for hundreds of other uses. The containers made by Continental Can Company bring you many products you use every day. Lots of your favorite food products are packed in containers made by Continental Can. So are many nationally famous drugs, motor oils, paints and thousands of other things for Continental containers serve behind the scenes behind the labels of America's finest products.
John Daly
Just about this time each week, the Continental Celebrity Club spotlight turns toward our young comedy star. Many radio personalities have been given nicknames that describe them pretty Accurately. Like the voice, the haircuts and the nose. Well, you've heard this young fella talk, so you know why we call him the Squeak. Here he is. Jackie Kelly.
Jackie Kelp
Hello, Mr. Daly. I've decided to leave home. A fella from the clothing drive came to our house the other day. He asked my father if he'd like to donate something he had no use for.
John Daly
Well, what did your father offer him?
Jackie Kelp
Me. You know, I ran away from home once before. My mother put a lighted candle in the window to guide me back. And your father, he kept blowing the candle out.
John Daly
Now, Jackie, I'm sure your father would be heartbroken if you left home.
Jackie Kelp
Wanna bet? He once got a threatening letter that said, if you don't pay us $10,000, you will never see your son again.
John Daly
Of course, he notified the police.
Jackie Kelp
No, he wrote back. I haven't got that much money. But your proposition interests me. He acts the same way toward my sister.
John Daly
Well, how do you mean?
Jackie Kelp
Well, a couple of weeks ago, a dog bitter. The man who owned the dog said to my father, I don't want to go to court. Let's settle for $50. And my father said, okay, here's $25 now. I'll give you the rest next Tuesday.
John Daly
Oh, Jackie, I can't believe it.
Linda Darnell
You can't? No.
John Daly
What makes your father act that way towards you and your sister?
Jackie Kelp
Well, of course he's mad at her because she's not married. But it's really not her fault. She was all set to elope one night. She had a postpone on account of the weather.
John Daly
On account of the weather?
Jackie Kelp
Mm. That blizzard of 1888 was awful. You know, I've been hoping she'll get interested in Ray Block.
John Daly
Ray Block?
Jackie Kelp
Oh, I forgot. You know, he's got a nickname too. The Scalp.
John Daly
You think your sister would go out with me? Jackie, most girls ignore me.
Jackie Kelp
Thank you, Mr. Block. Oh, it's so discouraging.
John Daly
Last night I went to a dance hall on Broadway. I hung around for two hours and one of the girls asked me to dance.
Jackie Kelp
Mr. Block, you're supposed to ask the girl.
John Daly
You shouldn't supposed to dine that way.
Jackie Kelp
Mr. Dale, you know, I like Mr. Block. He doesn't say much for what he does say. Pretty silly.
John Daly
All right, Jackson, but let's get back to your father. He's annoyed with your sister because she's not married. Now, what's he got against you?
Jackie Kelp
Oh, nothing much.
John Daly
But what is it?
Jackie Kelp
Oh, it's really very trivial.
John Daly
But what does he say about it?
Jackie Kelp
Just that I'm a lazy, half witted, untidy ignorant jerk. And I keep telling him what I am. Not untidy.
John Daly
You're not ignorant? I.
Jackie Kelp
No, of course not. Why, I spend whole days at the public library on 42nd Street.
John Daly
Good. There are thousands of wonderful books inside.
Jackie Kelp
Oh, do they let people inside?
John Daly
Oh, Jackie, have you ever tried to find a job with a future?
Linda Darnell
Oh, sure.
John Daly
What job did you apply for?
Jackie Kelp
Private secretary to Linda Darnell. I wrote a letter to her studio telling them how much I want the job.
John Daly
Well, they'll probably tell you to see Ms. Darnell.
Jackie Kelp
I have seen Mr. Arnell. That's why I want the job. Well, if I don't get it.
Nicole Fire
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Wayfair Voice
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John Daly
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Linda Darnell
21/ Terms and Conditions apply.
Jackie Kelp
There's only one other ambition I have. I want to become an aviator.
John Daly
Oh, now, Jackie, I don't think you're cut out to be an aviator. Can you see yourself carrying the mail from New York to California?
Linda Darnell
No.
John Daly
Why not?
Jackie Kelp
It's an awful long walk.
John Daly
No, no. Picture yourself flying the mail. You've taken the plane up to 5,000ft. You're doing 300 miles an hour. Each of the four motors is going across. Top speed.
Jackie Kelp
I'm 5,000ft up in the air. Handling four motors?
Linda Darnell
Yes.
Jackie Kelp
All by myself?
John Daly
Yes.
Jackie Kelp
I've got news for you, Mr. Dy.
Linda Darnell
What? I want more money.
John Daly
A fine pilot you are. So anyway, you're flying along and suddenly you realize you're slowing down. Realize you're slowing down. Can you tell why? Why?
Jackie Kelp
We must be going uphill.
John Daly
No no, no, it's because you're caught in a storm. It's. The rain is pouring down, the lightning is flashing, and there isn't a landing field in sight. Now what?
Jackie Kelp
I've got more news for you, Mr. Daly.
John Daly
What?
Jackie Kelp
The mail is going to be a little late this week. With all that rain and lightning, I don't know how I'd manage.
John Daly
You forgot something. You have a radio, Mr. Daly?
Jackie Kelp
At a time like that, who wants to listen to John's other wife?
John Daly
No, no, Jackie, you communicate with the landing field by radio. That's how you find the.
Jackie Kelp
Oh, is that how it works? Well, I don't have to talk to a landing field. I'll turn on the radio and talk to my father. I'll say, pop, what are you having for supper? And he'll say, a Limburger cheese sandwich.
John Daly
How will that get you home?
Jackie Kelp
I'll say, this is Jackie. Bring it over to the window, Pop. I'm coming in on the beam.
John Daly
Ray Block's musical surprise for tonight gives us a taste of the hunting season of a taste of the hunting season of birds on the wing of field and forest budding green to welcome spring, Ray Block's arrangement of A Whistler and His Dog.
Wayfair Voice
God.
John Daly
Having Enough Trinity.
Jackie Kelp
You know, if every can of food you bought at your grocers came to you with a big padlock hanging from it, you'd probably raise your eyebrows a bit, wouldn't you? But the fact is, not all the locks in the world could seal that food in any better, make it any more air proof or tamper proof than the sealing process right at the cannery. Yes, canned food is hermetically sealed and you can be sure the seal will not be broken, accidentally or otherwise, until you open the can right in your own kitchen. In other words, when you open a can of food, you can be sure it has never been opened before.
John Daly
And now, our guest for this evening, Ms. Linda Darnell.
Linda Darnell
Thank you, thank you, ladies and gentlemen. It's awfully nice to meet you here tonight on the Continental Celebrity Club, Ellen Shields and Frank Lovejoy. I'd like to change my name to Mary and do an original radio story called so We Meet Again.
John Daly
On a Certain Power. The names John and Mary are carved together inside a rough drawn heart. Beneath it is a fading date. 1936, a year which a young woman remembers well. End of the foot of the street. Presently, another woman comes along and stops beside.
Linda Darnell
Oh, I beg your pardon. Am I in your way? No, I just stop to look at. It's sort of Interesting, isn't it? Stranger. I wonder why. Because it makes you think about John and Mary. Makes you wonder who they are, where they are now. Probably miles from here. Just one. Well, the girl, shy of a kid, about 16 years old, you know, at the time, long legs, skinny and very serious about love. And the boy love and the boy love was a little too old. The boy was night. The boy was night. The boy was not. They were engaged. They were engaged.
Wayfair Voice
Not always happened to them.
Linda Darnell
It's a long story. They were supposed to get married.
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John Daly
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Wayfair Voice
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Linda Darnell
Cried her heart off for a while. Wa. And she went out west too. You think she's still looking? No, not anymore. For anything. I don't know. I haven't seen him in 10 years. And you haven't heard from him? Not a word. That's why I came here today. I thought I might find him here at the tree. Why? Because we made a promise 10 years ago today. We said we'd meet here no matter what, no matter how. But I don't think he's coming. Yes, he is. He'll be here. How do you know? Because he told me. I'm his wife.
Wayfair Voice
You're beautiful, Mary.
H
More beautiful than you ever were before.
Linda Darnell
Thank you, John. It's good seeing you again.
H
We should have made us 5 instead of 10.
Linda Darnell
What difference does that? You've been married a long time.
H
Do you know about that?
Linda Darnell
I just found out.
H
How?
Linda Darnell
Your wife told me. Just a few minutes before you got here.
H
Well, you met her.
Linda Darnell
Yes, John, she's awfully sweet.
H
Well, she had no right to come.
Linda Darnell
Why not?
John Daly
She loves you, doesn't she?
H
Well, even so, I. Well, I told her not to.
Linda Darnell
You told her something that broke her heart, John.
H
What?
Linda Darnell
But you have to find out if you're still in love with me.
H
That's true, Mary. I do have to find out.
Linda Darnell
After all these years. Couldn't you have done it before you were married?
H
I didn't think I had To. I was in love with her.
Linda Darnell
And now?
H
Now I don't know. Because it hasn't turned out the way I thought it.
Linda Darnell
Marriage never does.
H
Ours?
Linda Darnell
Ours wasn't a marriage, Joan. We were just a couple of kids making believe believe we found something nobody ever thought of before. Something that would last forever.
H
Maybe it would have never had a chance.
Linda Darnell
Now, do you think we can go back and pick up where we left off?
H
That all depends.
Linda Darnell
On what? What about you, John? Would you break up your home? Would you give up your two little boys and divorce your wife? A dream we had 10 years ago.
H
It's more than a dream, Mary. Didn't she tell you? It's a very real thing that comes between us and makes us wonder if we really are in love. That's why I have to find out about you.
Linda Darnell
How? How can you find out what we've already knew?
H
By seeing you again. By being with you.
Linda Darnell
Don't you know now?
H
Not until I hold you in my arm.
Linda Darnell
No, because it's not. I've had a life, too, these past 10 years. I haven't just sat by and waited for you to come back.
H
And why did you come here?
Linda Darnell
Because I had to find out, too, John. Only I knew the answer as soon as I saw you.
H
And what is the answer?
Linda Darnell
We're just a couple of sentimental fools, John. We don't know how well off we are.
H
What do you mean?
Linda Darnell
Well, here, I'll show you. Amelia. Amelia, bring the carriage over here, will you?
Jackie Kelp
Yes, Mrs. Branson.
H
Mrs. Branson?
Linda Darnell
That's right, Charles. I've been married for two years, and now I want you to meet my sweet little daughter.
John Daly
Ms. Darnell, that applause meant that our Celebrity Club notes its fine performance when it hears one.
Linda Darnell
Well, thank you, Mr. Daly. Oh, by the way, is there a Jackie Kelp connected with a Celebrity Club? You know, someone by that name who said he was very handsome and personable wrote a letter to my studio asking for a job as my secretary.
Jackie Kelp
Mr. Nell, I wrote that letter. I'm Jackie Kell.
Linda Darnell
Oh, when did you have the accident, Mr. Kell?
Jackie Kelp
What accident?
Linda Darnell
Oh, my goodness.
H
Were you.
Linda Darnell
Were you born with that face?
Jackie Kelp
Ms. Darnell, I may not be handsome now, but you should have seen me five years ago.
Linda Darnell
What were you like five years ago?
Jackie Kelp
Much younger. Anyway, you're the one who has all the beauty around here. Boy, I wish my sister could copy the way you wear your hair.
Linda Darnell
Well, thank you, Jack. This is an upsweep. What's your sister's hair do?
Jackie Kelp
It comes out when she combs It. Oh, but we're getting off the subject. Would you hire me as your secretary? Just to be near you? I'd work day and night, Sundays and holidays. And I'll be reasonable about money.
Linda Darnell
Well, just what do you call reasonable?
Jackie Kelp
I'm willing to pay you $20 a week.
Linda Darnell
Well, Jackie, it does happen that I. I do need a secretary. Do you know shorthand?
Jackie Kelp
Do I? Why, Mr. Arnell, I won this medal for shorthand and business. Look at the inscription on it.
Linda Darnell
Oh, what does it say?
Jackie Kelp
How should I know? It's in shorthand.
Linda Darnell
Jackie, you should have a doctor examine your head.
Jackie Kelp
You think so?
Linda Darnell
Yes. He says you have a brain. We'll have somebody examine the doctor.
Jackie Kelp
Mr. Arnell, please hire me as your secretary. If you don't think I know shorthand, try me out.
Linda Darnell
Well, all right. Now, here's a pencil and paper. Ready. Dear sir, this is Dr. Acknowledge your recent letter, and I wish to inform you that I will be in Chicago next month. At that time, I will be very happy to look over the contract you mentioned, and I trust I will find everything satisfactory. Sincerely, Linda Donnell. Got it? Every word?
Jackie Kelp
Every word except that stuff after. Dear sir.
Linda Darnell
Oh, you'll be a wonderful secretary. How's your typing?
Jackie Kelp
Typing? Oh, that's where I'm really an expert.
Linda Darnell
Oh, fine. I have a Corona.
Jackie Kelp
Well, you smoke it. I don't care for cigars.
Linda Darnell
What?
Jackie Kelp
Listen, there's a typewriter right here. Do you want to try me out?
Linda Darnell
Well, all right. Take this. Dear Mr. Jones, thank you for your invitation to your party, but I'm afraid I'll be out of town on Monday. However, I do hope you can arrange to drop in to see me the next time you're in California.
Jackie Kelp
Go ahead.
Linda Darnell
Go ahead. You didn't get everything I dictated.
Jackie Kelp
Why, sure I did. What else did you want to say?
Linda Darnell
Well, end the letter. Yours truly.
Jackie Kelp
Okay, Miss Darnell?
Linda Darnell
Yes, Jackie?
Jackie Kelp
How do you spell truly?
John Daly
Oh, dear.
Linda Darnell
Now, look, Jackie, you asked for a job as my secretary, but you haven't the slightest idea of typing her shorthand. Did you really expect to get the job?
Jackie Kelp
Well, gee, Miss Darnell, I. Jackie, let.
Linda Darnell
Me tell you a story. You see, once there was a fox who was looking for a certain crow, but he couldn't find it. Now, the crow was up in a tree eating a big piece of bologna. And when he finished it, he felt so good he started to crow. The fox heard him, jumped into the tree and ate him up. Now, that story has a moral for you.
Jackie Kelp
What's the moral?
Linda Darnell
Don't open your mouth. When you're full of baloney.
Jackie Kelp
Yes, and that's just the kind of a girl Frank Thompson married, too. The ideal wife who always has the right answer whenever he becomes a bit confused, as he seems to be right now.
John Daly
Jane. Jane.
Jackie Kelp
I'm right here, darling.
John Daly
Hey, baby. Did you see the porch furniture? Somebody gave the whole set a beautiful coat of paint.
Jackie Kelp
You like it?
John Daly
Like it? Gosh, I'm glad I didn't throw that furniture away after all. Why, it looks like new. Oh, how much did it cost?
Jackie Kelp
I. I'll send the painter a check right now.
Linda Darnell
Well, the painter tells me the job will cost you just one kiss.
John Daly
Hey, wait a minute.
Linda Darnell
Why not, darling?
Jackie Kelp
I painted that furniture myself.
Linda Darnell
So pay off.
John Daly
Come here, honey.
Jackie Kelp
I'm going to give that painter two kisses as a bonus. Well, it's nice to get fading kisses, but really it's no job at all to paint these days. In fact, it's easy and convenient because you can buy ready mixed paints in many different size cans. And you can be certain the paint comes to you fully protected from dust and other outside impurities. Another thing, it doesn't take an expert painter to prepare the paint before it's ready for use. Because all the blending and color toning is done for your right by the manufacturer. Yes, painting is fun and it's amazing what wonders it works in beautifying and protecting your home. Just remember, when you buy paints, the best paint brands come in Continental cans.
John Daly
Margaret Whiting is on stage again and it's ballad time. New or old, Margaret?
Wayfair Voice
I'm going to sing that lovely new ballad. John. Oh, what it seemed to be. It was just a neighborhood dance that's all that it was. But oh what it seemed to be. It was like a masquerade ball the costumes and all. Cause you were at the dance with me. It was just a ride on a train that's all that it was. But oh what it seemed to be. It was like a train trip to the star To Venus and Mars. Cause you were on the train with me. And when I kissed you, darling.
Linda Darnell
It.
Wayfair Voice
Was more than just a thrill to me. It was the promise, darling of the things that fate had willed for me. It was just a wedding in June that's all that it was. But oh what it seemed to be. It was like a royal affair with everyone there. Cause you said yes, I do to me. And when I kissed you, darling it was more than just a thrill for me. It was the promise, darling of the things that fate had will for me it was just a wedding In June. That's all that it was. But oh what it seemed to be. It was like a royal fair with everyone there. Cause you said yes, I do to me.
John Daly
Margaret, that was nicely done. See you again next week.
Wayfair Voice
Thank you, John. By the way, who's on our guest list for next Saturday night?
John Daly
The lovely motion picture star, Constance Bennett.
Wayfair Voice
Ms. Bennett is more than that, John. She's also motion picture producer.
Jackie Kelp
Say, I've got to make sure to meet her. Who knows, she might take one look at me and say, what a profile.
Wayfair Voice
What an actor.
Jackie Kelp
What a leading man.
Wayfair Voice
What a personality.
Jackie Kelp
What a chance. Good night, folks.
The Continental Celebrity Club is produced and directed by Mark Slobe. Linda Darnell appeared tonight through the courtesy of 20th Century Fox. And may soon be seen in her new 20th Century Fox Technicolor musical, Jerome Kern. Centennial Summer. Next week we'll have an addition to Jackie Kelp, Margaret Whiting, Ray Block's music. And John Daly, the glamorous Hollywood star, Ms. Constance Bennett. Be sure to join us then. The Continental Celebrity Club is brought to you by the 25,000 men and women of the Continental can family. Producing for the health, welfare and happiness of the nation. For the biggest show in town. Be sure to listen Saturday night to CBS. Beginning with the Helen Hay show at 7:00pm Eastern Standard Time. This is CBS, the Columbia Broadcasting System.
Ryan Seacrest
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Podcast Summary: Continental Celebrity Club 46-02-23 (12) Guest - Linda Darnell
Podcast Information:
The episode begins with a brief introduction by Jackie Kelp, the young comedy star, setting the stage for the evening's festivities. The Continental Celebrity Club features performances by Margaret Whiting and Ray Block's orchestra, alongside special guest Linda Darnell, a beloved Hollywood star.
Notable Quote:
Jackie Kelp engages in a humorous exchange with host John Daly, revealing quirky aspects of his family dynamics. Jackie shares amusing anecdotes about his father’s unconventional reactions to various situations, portraying his father's stern yet humorous personality.
Notable Quotes:
Linda Darnell is introduced as the special guest of the evening. She expresses her gratitude and announces her participation in an original radio story titled "So We Meet Again," hinting at a nostalgic and heartfelt narrative.
Notable Quote:
Linda Darnell narrates a poignant radio drama that delves into themes of lost love and unfulfilled promises. The story revolves around John and Mary, childhood sweethearts who made a pact to reunite at a specific tree ten years later, regardless of the circumstances.
Key Plot Points:
Notable Quotes:
Following the dramatic radio story, the host and guest engage in light-hearted banter. Jackie Kelp attempts to secure a job as Linda Darnell's secretary, leading to comedic exchanges that highlight his lack of qualifications. Meanwhile, regular host segments and advertisements intersperse the interactions, maintaining the show's dynamic pace.
Notable Quotes:
Margaret Whiting returns to perform her new ballad, "What It Seemed to Be," encapsulating the themes of love and reminiscence introduced in the radio drama. The episode concludes with a preview of next week's guest, Constance Bennett, and final acknowledgments from the host and production team.
Notable Quote:
Throughout the episode, advertisements for Wayfair and Chumba Casino are interspersed. These segments provide style tips for homes and promote online casino games, respectively. The commercials are seamlessly integrated, ensuring minimal interruption to the show's primary content.
Notable Quotes:
This episode of "Continental Celebrity Club" masterfully blends comedy, heartfelt storytelling, and musical performances, anchored by the charismatic presence of guest Linda Darnell. Through engaging dialogues and a moving radio drama, the show explores themes of love, commitment, and personal growth, all while entertaining its audience with laughter and music.
Note: Advertisements and non-content segments have been purposefully omitted to focus on the core discussions and narratives of the episode.