
Eb and Zeb 33-xx-xx (106) Eb and Zeb Taking Inventory
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Jed
Well, come on. Come on, dad, burn it. We're late getting to the store. Now.
Ed
What? Darn fast, Jed. I told you I got a sore foot.
Jed
You always got something the matter with you. How'd you hunt the foot anyhow?
Ed
It's time to sign Oakley cell on it. What an Oakley.
Jed
And you've been making all that fuss just because anything like an Oakley fell out of a tree and live in your foot.
Ed
It doesn't fall out of no tree. It fell out of dying. Untable.
Jed
Much. Left mine to hum, I take it. Well, what he's telling me is scratching.
Ed
Your head first because I'm the only one that knows her.
Jed
This is young fellas. Let's get busy. We just find the ladder and climb up there and see what's on the top shelf. We got to take over the shop this morning.
Ed
Why don't you let it go till tomorrow?
Jed
No, sir. Tomorrow is nothing. You're going to do it today. Now, Ed, you go get that ladder done this long ago. You tell me.
Ed
Tie him up there. I got a bun.
Jed
Me. Oh, never mind. When you go, get up there. Well, now, tell me what we got and I'll write it down Here.
Ed
Don't rush it. I am climbing that thing. Not.
Jed
Yes, just climbing my side and taking just about as long. Right. What's up there? What's that box? All right. One box. Stopping lazily. Thread. One box. Toppings lady threads. Is nothing in it. Wait a second. I'll get it down. All right, go ahead. Get inside that wooden box there and see what's in it. Oh, what you're talking about. That ain't ketchup. Ketchup ain't that kind. You better get down from there and do the right one. I see what's up there myself.
Ed
You want me to come down? Yes, come on down.
Jed
Don't think all day about it. Could have done it in the first place.
Ed
With the goddamn smile. What else? What?
Jed
Down. Down.
Ed
Down where?
Jed
Oh, down.
Ed
Nowhere. Down. Down.
Jed
Like to get off a duck? I say, like to get down off a duck.
Ed
I've never been up on a duck.
Jed
Good morning. Something for you this morning?
Mrs. Smith
Yes, sir. My husband brought it here last evening and it's loose. Look at it. It hasn't any button in it.
Ed
Well, that ain't our fault. It's a depression.
Mrs. Smith
The depressum?
Ed
Yes. Just knocks the bottom out of everything.
Jed
But that's all right, ma'am. And we're just removing and fitness more.
Mrs. Smith
Those eggs you told him were bad, too.
Jed
What's that?
Mrs. Smith
Eggs bad yes, they were.
Jed
Well, that's funny. Now. Well do. We'll do some first.
Mrs. Smith
Very well. Oh, do you want me to return the bad egg?
Jed
No, no, no. We'll take your word first.
Ed
Yeah, your word is just as good as he is.
Mrs. Smith
Say, are you kind? Yes. We just recently moved here, my husband and I. My husband is writing a book, you know. He's a native entomologist. An entomologist? He looks for insects.
Ed
Oh, you mean the solar man.
Mrs. Smith
I know nothing of the sort. He's a scientist. And a very great scientist. He spent four years in the Orient studying insect life. Traveling all the way from Japan to the land of the pharaohs. Egypt. The pharaohs.
Ed
Well, who you say Jeff said he gripped the pharaoh.
Mrs. Smith
No, no, he didn't whip the pharaoh.
Ed
Well, you bring me wrong.
Jed
He didn't whip it down.
Mrs. Smith
No, no, that isn't it.
Ed
Something else Besides the bucket, Mr. Maggie.
Mrs. Smith
Yes? I want a can of soup.
Ed
What time?
Mrs. Smith
What time had you got?
Jed
Why, of course we have E.B. what you talking about? It's right there in the second shelf. Pain as a nose in your face.
Ed
Go now.
Jed
And sexy.
Mrs. Smith
Well, they're not. I'll take some pencil soup and hurry.
Ed
Well, I'll do my best, but you know how terrible that.
Jed
And get. Get a new bucket and put a guy with eggs in it.
Mrs. Smith
Oh, by the way, I want to drive over to Switzerland. Let us make any difference which range I take.
Jed
And that to me, ma'am.
Mrs. Smith
Oh dear. I mean, which is the shortest road?
Jed
Oh, the shortest road. Well, you take the road to the left and that'll get you there. Straight to the coal flies.
Mrs. Smith
I beg your pardon. I can hardly understand understand you. You have to do something for that impediment in your teeth. Why don't you practice saying seashells?
Jed
Seashells? I did. I did practice it.
Ed
That's right. I got the dang thing down perfect too. Right here is just sea cells. Sea cells.
Mrs. Smith
Well, you have mastered that, haven't you?
Ed
Yes, that sounds. Sorry. Sorry sounds. Slipping in a conversation.
Mrs. Smith
Well, here's the queen for the peak. And you say I'd better take the left hand road to Squidsville.
Jed
Yes, and. Yes. And that's the one road right to Squidville. Float as a flow cry.
Ed
I reckon you mean straight as the cry flows.
Jed
I don't never. I mean straight as the flow cries.
Mrs. Smith
Just a moment.
Ed
You're wrong. Straight as a flow flies.
Jed
You're crazy. As Straight as a fly crow.
Ed
Straight as a dry fly. There.
Podcast Summary: "Eb and Zeb Taking Inventory" (Episode 106)
Harold's Old Time Radio
Release Date: April 3, 2025
In episode 106 of Harold's Old Time Radio, titled "Eb and Zeb Taking Inventory," listeners are transported back to the charming and humorous dynamics of the Golden Age of Radio. This episode features the beloved characters Eb and Zeb, who manage a bustling local store. The storyline revolves around their day-to-day interactions, inventory challenges, and amusing customer encounters that showcase their unique personalities and the era's quintessential humor.
The episode opens with Jed (Eb) urging his father, Ed (Zeb), to hurry up as they are late to get to the store ([00:07]). The conversation quickly reveals Ed's sore foot, adding a layer of everyday struggle to the narrative. Jed is portrayed as the impatient and proactive son, pushing Ed to handle store responsibilities promptly.
As they delve into taking inventory, the dialogue shifts to humorous misunderstandings and mishaps. Jed insists on climbing the ladder to inspect the top shelf, leading to a series of comedic exchanges about misplaced items and faulty products. Their interaction with Mrs. Smith, a customer with her own set of eccentricities, further amplifies the comedic tension. Mrs. Smith's complaints about bad eggs and her husband's obscure entomological pursuits add depth to the characters and their relationships.
Inventory Management:
Humorous Product Issues:
Customer Relations:
Jed on Urgency ([00:07]):
Jed: "Well, come on, dad, burn it. We're late getting to the store. Now."
Ed on His Sore Foot ([00:19]):
Ed: "What? Darn fast, Jed. I told you I got a sore foot."
Mrs. Smith on Her Husband's Work ([05:40]):
Mrs. Smith: "My husband is writing a book, you know. He's a native entomologist. An entomologist? He looks for insects."
Jed on Practicing Pronunciations ([07:27]):
Mrs. Smith: "I can hardly understand you. You have to do something for that impediment in your teeth. Why don't you practice saying seashells?"
Ed's Frustration ([07:43]):
Ed: "That's right. I got the dang thing down perfect too. Right here is just sea cells. Sea cells."
Humorous Miscommunication ([08:16]):
Jed: "I don't never. I mean straight as the flow cries."
Ed: "Straight as a dry fly. There."
"Eb and Zeb Taking Inventory" masterfully encapsulates the essence of the Golden Age of Radio through its rich character interactions and situational comedy. The episode highlights the timeless challenges of running a small business, such as inventory management and customer satisfaction, all while infusing humor through clever dialogues and misunderstandings.
The dynamic between Eb and Zeb showcases a relatable father-son relationship, balancing authority and cooperation amidst chaos. Mrs. Smith serves as a perfect foil, bringing external pressures that test Eb and Zeb's problem-solving skills and patience.
Overall, this episode not only entertains but also offers a nostalgic glimpse into the familial and community bonds that were central to radio shows of the past. Listeners new and old will appreciate the blend of humor, character development, and the charming depiction of a bygone era's everyday life.
Harold's Old Time Radio continues to honor the legacy of classic radio through episodes like "Eb and Zeb Taking Inventory." By weaving together engaging narratives, memorable characters, and witty exchanges, this episode stands as a testament to the enduring appeal of old-time radio entertainment. Whether you're a longtime fan or a newcomer, this installment promises laughter and a heartfelt reflection on the simple yet intricate joys of running a local store.