Ellery Queen 43-01-09 (107) The Singing Rat

Summary

Podcast Summary: Harold's Old Time Radio

Episode: Ellery Queen 43-01-09 (107) The Singing Rat
Release Date: March 6, 2025

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Introduction

In this thrilling episode of Harold's Old Time Radio, listeners are transported back to the Golden Age of Radio with Ellery Queen, the renowned gentleman detective. Hosted by Ellery Queen himself, this episode titled The Singing Rat weaves a captivating narrative filled with suspense, clever investigations, and engaging guest interactions. The story unfolds with Ellery Queen and his companion, Nikki Porter, delving into a complex web of deceit and betrayal centered around a mysterious figure known as Musso the Moose.

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Setting the Scene

[00:54] Ellery Queen:
“Tonight's story concerns the adventures Nikki and I had when a stool pigeon gave us incriminating evidence against Musso the Moose. I call it the Adventure of the Singing Rat.”

The episode kicks off with Ellery introducing the central mystery involving Musso the Moose, a notorious racketeer. Accompanied by his trusty sidekick, Nikki Porter, Ellery sets the stage for a night of unraveling the truth behind Musso's criminal activities.

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Introduction of Key Characters

[00:01] Ernest Chapel (Announcer):
“In the studio tonight, we have as our guest Ms. Anne Corio, glamorous screen and stage star, and Mr. Alfred D. McElvey, prominent Eastern manufacturer.”

Guests Anne Corio, a glamorous stage and screen star, and Alfred D. McElvey, a prominent Eastern manufacturer and amateur radio detective, join Ellery Queen to participate in solving the mystery before the official resolution is revealed.

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The Mystery Unfolds

[01:17] Inspector Queen:
“Inspector, look who's paying a visit to headquarters. The Singing Rat. So Minzy. Always glad to see the rat.”

Inspector Queen introduces Sir Rodent, the so-called Singing Rat, who claims to have vital information about Musso the Moose's whereabouts. However, tensions rise as Ellery observes inconsistencies in the Inspector's handling of the situation.

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Clues and Conflicts

[09:29] Inspector Queen:
“Greatest choir in Epsom.”
[09:47] Nikki Porter:
“Well, where Ellery put that piece of…”
[09:53] Inspector Queen:
“Nicky, this document, Musso's handwriting is a payroll report. What quote? Paid the judge, Eustace F. Lampson, $19,000 for appointing Phil Boyne as receiver in bankruptcy.”

The investigation intensifies as Inspector Queen discovers a hollow cigarette filled with incriminating evidence— a payroll report linking Judge Lampson to Musso's corruption scheme. This revelation points to a deeper conspiracy involving multiple high-profile individuals.

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Interlude: Bromo Seltzer Advertisement

[04:43] Ernest Chapel:
“Friends, you like to save money, don't you? And you like fast relief from a common sick headache...”

As was typical in Golden Age radio shows, the episode includes a promotional segment for Bromo Seltzer, seamlessly integrated into the narrative without disrupting the flow of the mystery.

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Rising Tension and Revelation

[11:23] Nikki Porter:
“Ellery, what's the matter with the singing rat?”
[11:25] Ellery Queen:
“He's backing away from the window.”
[12:00] Ellery Queen:
“Here's the bullet hole in his coat. But I don't see. Can't find the wound. Licking. Not a sign of blood.”

The plot thickens when Musso the Moose is found dead in Central Park, allegedly from a rifle shot meant for Inspector Queen. Intriguingly, evidence suggests that the bullet passed through the victim without leaving a significant wound, hinting at foul play and manipulation of evidence.

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Guest Participation: Armchair Detectives

[20:32] Nikki Porter:
“Well, our first guest tonight is Anne Corio, glamorous stage and screen star...”
[21:02] Ellery Queen:
“Ms. Corio, who is the criminal?”
[21:07] Nikki Porter:
“Well, I. Rather difficult, but I think the rat stole the cigarette...”
[21:35] Ellery Queen:
“Thank you, Ms. Corio.”
[21:40] Inspector Queen:
“Well, I've missed some easier guesses than this...”

Guests Anne Corio and Alfred D. McElvey engage in solving the mystery as "armchair detectives," offering their theories on who the true culprit might be. Their interactions provide an interactive element, inviting listeners to think along and participate in the deduction process.

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Climactic Conclusion

[23:16] Nikki Porter:
“That lifting little appraiser, Ernie?”
[24:01] Inspector Queen:
“That's right, he did.”
[24:03] Ellery Queen:
“The judge, the rat, Counselor Wicker, Ernie, even you, dad and Nicky were all so shaken...”
[24:53] Inspector Queen:
“I see it now. Sir.”
[24:54] Ellery Queen:
“Yes, dad. We know one of Musso's specially monogrammed cigarettes was substituted...”
[19:58] Inspector Queen:
“Looks like a tough one to me, Ellie.”

Through meticulous analysis and keen observation, Ellery Queen deciphers the critical clue: Phil Boyne’s atypical behavior regarding smoking. Despite carrying a cigarette case, Boyne refuses a cigarette during the crisis, indicating he doesn't smoke and therefore used the cigarette case for nefarious purposes— namely, hiding the evidence.

[23:47] Inspector Queen:
“Like an old lady got his start.”
[24:34] Nikki Porter:
“But how do you know? Good Boyne.”

By connecting the dots, Ellery concludes that Phil Boyne, the politician involved in the bankruptcy racket, orchestrated the murder to eliminate Musso and secure his hold on the corrupt scheme. His behavior and possession of the non-smoking cigarette case served as the final pieces of evidence needed to unmask him as the antagonist.

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Final Resolution and Rewards

[21:02] Ellery Queen:
“Ms. Corio, who is the criminal?”
[24:53] Inspector Queen:
“I see it now. Sir.”
[25:38] Ellery Queen:
“I want to thank Ms. Ann Corio and Mr. Alfred McKelvey for appearing as guest armchair detectives this evening.”

Ellery successfully reveals Phil Boyne as the mastermind behind the corruption and the murder of Musso the Moose. The episode concludes with heartfelt thanks to the guests, who are rewarded for their participation with gifts from Bromo Seltzer and copies of Ellery Queen's latest works, seamlessly tying back to the episode's sponsor.

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Notable Quotes

• Ellery Queen:
  “I call it the Adventure of the Singing Rat.” [00:54]

• Inspector Queen:
  “The Singing Rat. So Minzy. Always glad to see the rat.” [01:17]

• Ellery Queen:
  “Someday, Nicky, you’ll appreciate how much Detective work relies on these small details.” [12:25]

• Nikki Porter:
  “But how do you know? Good Boyne.” [23:28]

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Conclusion

The Singing Rat delivers a compelling narrative filled with intrigue, masterful detective work, and interactive guest participation. Ellery Queen's sharp intellect and attention to detail shine as he unravels a complex conspiracy, ultimately bringing justice to Musso the Moose. The episode not only entertains but also invites listeners to engage in the mystery-solving process, embodying the essence of Golden Age radio storytelling.

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Stay tuned for next week's episode, "The Adventure of Mr. Short and Mr. Long," where Ellery Queen tackles a baffling disappearance reminiscent of Sherlock Holmes' most perplexing cases.

Transcript

[Ernest Chapel]

Presents the Adventures of Ellery Queen. Tonight, the bakers of Bromo Seltzer bring you another thrilling adventure with Ellery Queen, the celebrated gentleman detective in person. Ellery Queen again gives you a chance to match wits with him as he relates a new story of a crime he alone unraveled. And then, at the point where he was able to solve the mystery, he stops the play, gives you a chance to guess the criminal's name. In the studio tonight, we have as our guest Ms. Anne Corio, glamorous screen and stage star, and Mr. Alfred D. McElvey, prominent Eastern manufacturer. Ms. Corio and Mr. McKelvey have accepted Ellery Queen's challenge to solve the mystery before the solution is revealed. And now, Ellery Queen, master detective and your host for the next half hour.

[Ellery Queen]

Thank you, Ernest Chapel, and good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Tonight's story concerns the adventures Nikki and I had when a stool pigeon gave us incriminating evidence against Musso the Moose. I call it the Adventure of the Singing Rat.

[Inspector Queen]

Inspector, look who's paying a visit to headquarters. The Singing Rat. The Singing Rat. So Minzy. Always glad to see the rat. Enter, Sir Rodent.

[Nikki Porter]

Yes, sir.

[Inspector Queen]

Jack, really shut that door and keep it shut. Right. What's your song today, Rat? Listen, Inspector, I got something big, see? Nobody can hear me, huh? The rat's a little shaky, Inspector. He's got something for us on Muzo and mucha. What is it, Rat? Sing. Listen, Inspector Queen, I can tell you how to get the Moose but good. See who sold the moose. Very well, but you gotta give me protection, Inspector. Put me in stir until this blows over. Come on. Come on, Rat. What do you got tonight? See? 12 sharp, the moose will be in a parked car at the northwest corner of Broadway and Vesey Street. All you gotta do, Inspector, is to hook what he's got in the upper right hand pocket of his vest. I'll show that dirty. Really ain't me around, huh? Put the Singing Rat in the Sarah. Book him on some charge. Make it look legitimate suspicion of petty larceny. And that's no lie. Orders, Inspector. Three men here at 11:30. Absolute secrecy. There mustn't be a leak. Maybe what's in that mobster's vest pocket is the evidence I've been looking for for five. Why don't he show up, Moose? I don't like sitting in this park car. You be like a me kagai. Big businessman. Soft, nice, easy relaxer. Yeah, Moose. Yeah. But why do we got to meet his nibs on street corners? We're Wide open. You don't understand. That's why you're a punk and I'm.

[Ellery Queen]

A moose of the Moose.

[Inspector Queen]

He's important man. Sure, I can't make them come up to the apartment like last week, but he's taking a chance. If somebody sees him. Hey, Moose, they'd like to dance. It's the cops. Cops. Now keep your pants on, Cockey. You're much a nice car.

[Ernest Chapel]

Sit still, Cockey.

[Ellery Queen]

No, don't start nothing.

[Inspector Queen]

I got him. Cover Sergeant. Blast the line on him. All right, step out, Moose. You too, mug. Wait for a ride and you'll be angel food before you hit the sidewalk. Come on.

[Ernest Chapel]

Hello, Sergeant.

[Inspector Queen]

You is so about something? Sure, we come out. Good evening, Moose. Oh, he's my old friend, Inspector Queen. Neither of them's healed. Inspector. Inspector, Every time you pull in the.

[Ellery Queen]

Moose, you gotta let me go again.

[Inspector Queen]

And you know getting the tired. Hold your arms high, Moose. Stand still and you won't be hurt. Clint, glue that submachine gun to his back so he won't get ambitious.

[Ernest Chapel]

Hey, do you nuts, Inspector.

[Ellery Queen]

What's the idea?

[Inspector Queen]

All right, Bailey, put your hand in the upper right pocket of his vest and take out whatever's in there. My vest?

[Ellery Queen]

You don't do that.

[Inspector Queen]

I wanted my mouthpiece. Take your hand out of my vest. Let me go. Nice mercy there.

[Ellery Queen]

Somebody sees a squeal, I find out.

[Inspector Queen]

Who, he's a dead man. I kill him. I kill him.

[Ellery Queen]

And there, ladies and gentlemen, you have the beginning of our mystery. We'll be back in just a moment to tell you more. But first, Ernest Chapel.

[Ernest Chapel]

Friends, you like to save money, don't you? And you like fast relief from a common sick headache.

[Ellery Queen]

Of course.

[Ernest Chapel]

But what saving money got to do with that? Ah, plenty. So listen closely. Right now at your drugstore you can get the large 60 cent size bottle of Bromo Seltzer for only 39 cents.

[Ellery Queen]

Now.

[Ernest Chapel]

Anyway you figure it, that's a saving of 20% or more. Then talk about quick effective relief. But I'll let Mr. Howard B. Abel of Pipersville, Pennsylvania tell you about that.

[Inspector Queen]

He writes, whenever I get a common sick headache, I always take Bromo Seltzer. Because I found out many years ago.

[Ernest Chapel]

That there's just nothing better.

[Inspector Queen]

Recently, I won my wife over to Bromo Seltzer too.

[Ernest Chapel]

One day she had a common sick.

[Inspector Queen]

Headache and the preparation she usually took.

[Ernest Chapel]

Just didn't seem to help her. I persuaded her to let me fix.

[Inspector Queen]

Her a Bromo Seltzer. Well, she was delighted at how quickly she got relief you can be sure.

[Ernest Chapel]

There'S always a bottle of Bromo Seltzer in our home. Ah, millions of folks feel just as you do, Mr. Abel. Which reminds me, you old users of Bromo Seltzer will want to get in on this wonderful special, too. But you must hurry. This offer is strictly limited, both as to time and quantity. So tomorrow, go to your druggist, ask him for the regular large, 60 cent size bottle of Bromo Seltzer, but pay him only 39 cents. Better still, get two bottles. One for your desk or locker, one for home use. And now let's join Ellery Queen and Nikki Porter as they visit Inspector Queen at headquarters the morning after the capture of Musso, the racketeer.

[Ellery Queen]

What's up, dad? Why the hurry call?

[Inspector Queen]

Oh, hey, I didn't want you. I wanted Nicky.

[Ellery Queen]

Oh, I see.

[Nikki Porter]

Me. Inspector, this is so sudden.

[Inspector Queen]

Would you act as my stenographer this morning, Nicky? My own man's homesick, and this is very confidential. Musso case.

[Nikki Porter]

Give me a pad and a couple of pencils, Inspector, and I'll be silent. Susan herself.

[Ellery Queen]

Dad, don't tell me you finally tied the Moose up to the bankruptcy racket.

[Inspector Queen]

I sure have.

[Nikki Porter]

What on earth is the bankruptcy racket, Ellery?

[Ellery Queen]

A cute little dodge to defraud unlucky business people. The firm goes into bankruptcy, a crooked judge appoints some politician as receiver. A crooked appraiser undervalues the property magnificently. It goes for a song. And everyone involved in the racket, except the bankrupt and his creditors, makes a heap of crooked money.

[Inspector Queen]

We've known about this ring for a long time, Nicky. Judge Lampson appoints the receiver, Phil Boyne. Bourne's a slick politician, little lisping jerk by the name of Paul Ernie. He's a crooked appraiser and a woman lawyer. Fanny Wicker handles the legal end. All on the Moose's payroll. But we've never been able to prove it.

[Nikki Porter]

I see.

[Inspector Queen]

Here comes Vivie now. To Singing Rat. Come in, the Rat. Sit yourself. Right this way, brother Rat. Inspector Mooser's out on bail. Keep your shirt on, Rat. We shouldn't keep him in a cell indefinitely at this early stage. But he knows I was made at Sang. I tell you, he'll get me. He'll get nobody. Really. Show those four good citizens into my office. Yes, sir. I've been waiting for this a long, long time. In there, folks. Guard Grant, get over there near the window and lie low. Yeah, okay. Ah, Judge Lampson. Come in, Ms. Wicker, Mr. Bourne, attorney.

[Ellery Queen]

Really?

[Inspector Queen]

Shut that door and see we're not interrupted. Oh, yes, sir. Inspector Green, what's the meaning of this.

[Ellery Queen]

High handed procedure failing a member of the bench to your office like a felon?

[Inspector Queen]

I'll explain in a moment, you, Honor. Ms. Whitler, I believe we had the pleasure yesterday when you showed up in court with $50,000 for Musso's bail. Come on, Inspector, what have you got? You didn't ask me to your office today to admire my new shade of lipstick.

[Nikki Porter]

What a horsey.

[Inspector Queen]

Woman cried Nikki Notes and Phil Boyne don't see you down here very often. Well, I always say, stay away from wine, women and police headquarters if you want to keep out of trouble. Inspector. Mr. Ernie, man, is something wrong? You look sick. Your Fraser racket good, Ernie? No complaint, Inspector. In fact, today is my busy day. Maybe a lot busier before sundown, Mr. Ernie. Now, that night I arrested m the racketeer. In his vest pocket I found a case full of cigarettes. Cigarettes? Yes, cigarettes. The Moose folks. A special brand. They bear his monogram in gold lever. Very swanky. The Moose head. One of the monogram cigarettes in the Moose's case. In fact, this one on my desk here. Yes, yes, here's it.

[Ellery Queen]

That's it.

[Inspector Queen]

That one's a very special cigarette. Not like the others in Musso's case. Looks like one of Musso's regular cigarettes to me. Does it, Counselor? Hillary, hand me that cigarette.

[Ellery Queen]

Here you are, Dan. What is this, Mr. Barnum?

[Inspector Queen]

Greatest choir in Epsom. Now, this cigarette looks like an ordinary Musso cigarette, but it isn't. It ends up plugged with little wads of tobacco which are removable. See? In other words, it's hollow. Contains something. I wonder what it can be.

[Nikki Porter]

Well, where Ellery put that piece of.

[Ellery Queen]

Paper, tightly rolled up, a document of some sort?

[Inspector Queen]

Nicky, this document, Moussa's handwriting is a payroll report. What quote? Paid the judge, Eustace F. Lampson, $19,000 for appointing Phil Boy and receiver in bankruptcy. And it's got your signature, Judge Lampson.

[Ellery Queen]

Attempt to blacken my good name. I don't even know Musso.

[Nikki Porter]

Inspector.

[Inspector Queen]

I seen the judge go up to the motion department only last week.

[Ellery Queen]

So that's why this notorious thief and police informer is in your office, Inspector. It.

[Inspector Queen]

It was the rat. He's the one who sang. Inspector, let's talk this over. I've got some influence, you know. Have you, Boyne? You're gonna need it. Let's cut the salami.

[Nikki Porter]

What else have you got, Inspector Queen?

[Inspector Queen]

Your signature and receipt, Ms. Wicker. Bill Boynes and Ernie, let's see that paper. Oh, no, Judge. You'd like to get your hands on this little piece of paper, wouldn't you? Itchy fingers, counselor. Ms. Ernie, Mr. Bourne, we've just removed temptation. Roll the paper up again, tuck it back into this hollow cigarette like this. Put back the four tobacco plugs, and we've got the evidence all ready for the District Attorney.

[Ellery Queen]

Well, I doubt it did a thing.

[Inspector Queen]

I've been in politics a long time, Inspector, and I've seen a lot of wise cops come and go, groove it, take you through the court. What do you intend to do, Inspector? I want Musso. The DA will go easy on any one of you who gives evidence to break Musso's power and put him out of circulation. It's up to you four.

[Nikki Porter]

Ellery, what's the matter with the singing rat?

[Ellery Queen]

He's backing away from the window.

[Inspector Queen]

Hey, what's the matter?

[Ellery Queen]

Try in that building across the street.

[Inspector Queen]

Aiming a rifle at me through the window. He's got to shoot. Hey, Boyne, save me. Don't grab me, you rat. Billy, that building opposite. Man with a rifle. Clint Bigot.

[Ellery Queen]

Grab that sniper.

[Inspector Queen]

Who got it?

[Nikki Porter]

Mr. Boing. Sergeant. He's hurt.

[Ellery Queen]

Let me through here, please.

[Inspector Queen]

Bill. Bill. Boeing. I couldn't help it. I see the rifle, I duck. I grabs Brian so he gets it instead of me. It must have been the moose. He's trying to kill for square M. Attempt in my office. Bo.

[Ellery Queen]

Bo, where were you?

[Inspector Queen]

Oh, no.

[Ernest Chapel]

I call an ambulance.

[Inspector Queen]

When you call a doctor, I'm shot. I'm. I still. I still born. Where does it hurt?

[Ellery Queen]

Here's the bullet hole in his coat. But I don't see. Can't find the wound. Licking. Not a sign of blood. Now stop crying, Bo. What are you crying for? Plain funk, dad. Nervous shock.

[Inspector Queen]

Listen, Bo, you're all right. Gone out, hurt. Not even a stretch, thank goodness. But the bullet went right through his coat.

[Ellery Queen]

Mice through his coat, Sergeant. Through this cigarette case in his breast pocket and smack up against this steel vest he's wearing. What?

[Inspector Queen]

The steel vest?

[Ellery Queen]

Yes, dad. See, here's the vest and here's the flattened slug. All he got was a chest bruise. Now, get up, boy, and stop acting like a baby.

[Nikki Porter]

I'm shaking like a custard pudding.

[Inspector Queen]

Look at the rat, Ms. Porter. If he was milk, he'd be butter. Give me a butt, somebody. Give me a butt, will you?

[Ellery Queen]

Here you are, Mr. Rat.

[Inspector Queen]

Me, too, Queen. Thanks. I can use one.

[Ellery Queen]

I guess we all can, counselor. Mr. Bourne.

[Inspector Queen]

No, no, I don't want any.

[Ellery Queen]

I'll have one of those cigarettes, Mr. Cleave. Of course, Judge. Mr. Erning. Thanks, dad. Nicky.

[Nikki Porter]

But.

[Inspector Queen]

Yes, thanks. Thanks, son. Now, let's get back to cases. Are you good citizens going to testify against Musso, or aren't you? Ms. Wicker, I can't think straight.

[Nikki Porter]

Now, Inspector, give us a little time.

[Inspector Queen]

Time, Counselor, sir, I can give you my answer. Now, don't be hasty. Let's talk this over. Okay. I'll give you people just two days to make up your mind. No longer. All right, Billy, let him go. This way out. Your Honor. Come on. Come on, Billy. Any report on that feeling across the street? No luck, Inspector. By the time the boys got there, the guy that fired the rifle had taken a powder.

[Ellery Queen]

No.

[Inspector Queen]

I'll never hear the end of this.

[Ellery Queen]

Sad. The Singing Rat.

[Inspector Queen]

He's gone. Billy, where'd the rat go? I don't know, Inspector. I didn't see him.

[Nikki Porter]

I guess Brother Rat. Besides, police headquarters isn't as safe as he'd think it.

[Inspector Queen]

Fool. Now, Musho, get him. Sure.

[Ellery Queen]

I advise you to be very careful about this evidence on your desk. Put this fake cigarette in a safe place.

[Inspector Queen]

Don't worry, son. I'm putting the Moose's monogram butt with that payroll report inside in the thickest vault at headquarters.

[Ellery Queen]

You better do it now, Dan. There are five desperate people. Judge Lamson, attorney Wicker, appraiser, Ernie, politician Boyne, and Musso himself, who will stop at nothing to get their hands on it.

[Nikki Porter]

Seems to me we practically live at police headquarters these days. Ellery, that's the occasion for this visit to the inspector's office.

[Ellery Queen]

Don't you remember, Nikki? The deadline dad gave Muso's four distinguished co workers is up this afternoon.

[Nikki Porter]

Well, why should that make you look goofy? This isn't your case anyway. Even if it were, there's no mystery about it.

[Ellery Queen]

I know, I know. Just the same, Nicky, there's something wrong. It's been bothering me for days. Can't put my finger on it.

[Nikki Porter]

You and your imagination. Here's the inspector's office.

[Inspector Queen]

Isn't he there either? Well, find him. Blasted. Oh, Henry. Nicky.

[Nikki Porter]

Anything new on the Moose case, Inspector?

[Ellery Queen]

Have you heard from Judge Lanson yet? Or the others dead?

[Inspector Queen]

Oh, to hear in a minute. Now, you've only agreed to testify against that slippery mobster. Yes? Annie Wicker's here, Inspector. Who's his mouthpiece? Send the counselor in. Something tells me this is Good news. Ah, Ms. Wicker. Well, has that smart legal brain of yours looked over all the angles of the corner you people are in.

[Nikki Porter]

You win, Inspector.

[Inspector Queen]

Ah. We'll cooperate with the da Give what evidence we can against Merceau, provided we're protected and the DA makes a deal. That's very smart.

[Nikki Porter]

Look at the infectious face, Ellery. He looks positively blissful.

[Ellery Queen]

Something wrong, Nikki? Something wrong?

[Inspector Queen]

Glad you see it that way, Ms. Wicker. You're here as spokesman for the whole group? All except Judge Lamson. His Honor is going to fight. Inspector, that's the worst decision His Honor ever made. So the Moose is going down for the count at last. Out on bail, is he? Not for long. Excuse me. Yes, Inspector. Clearly. Bailey, I've been combing the city for you. Where are you? Central Park. Listen, Inspector. Central Park? What are you doing in Central Park? Sharing nuts with the squirrels? Listen, Inspector, it's about the move. The move? What's about the move? A park cop just found him under a bush with a bullet in his brain. Believe me, I've seen a good news.

[Nikki Porter]

Look at that crowd of reporters. Ellery.

[Ellery Queen]

What, Nikki?

[Nikki Porter]

Ellery Queen, what's the matter with you?

[Ellery Queen]

Nothing, Nikki, nothing. It's just that I can't get it out of my mind.

[Nikki Porter]

Get what out of your mind? Oh, your imagination again. Meanwhile, that racketeer is lying here in the pot. Murdered?

[Ellery Queen]

Yes.

[Inspector Queen]

You guys got your pictures?

[Ellery Queen]

Now go on. Oh, dad.

[Inspector Queen]

Well, Moose got it in the brain, Hillary. He rounded up his gang with their deaf, dumb and blind.

[Nikki Porter]

What was Musso doing in Central Park, I wonder?

[Ellery Queen]

Obviously, Nikki, he had an appointment with his murderer. You see here? Bodies lying behind a bush in this clump of trees, and no signs of its being dragged. They were arguing here. Oh, Sergeant, did you find the gun?

[Inspector Queen]

Yeah, Maestro. It's the Moose's own rod. One chamber's empty. He struggled over Moose's gun, Ellery, and the other gentleman won.

[Nikki Porter]

He's no gentleman, dad.

[Ellery Queen]

How long's the Moose been lying here dead, Doc?

[Inspector Queen]

Patty says he was bumped off sometime today. He didn't die right away. So Doc says there's no telling exactly how long he lingered. Could have been murdered anytime this morning or early afternoon. Rabbit to check antibodies.

[Ellery Queen]

Dad, look at this.

[Inspector Queen]

What, son?

[Ellery Queen]

I just found it out of the body. This hollow cigarette with the Moose monogram on it.

[Inspector Queen]

A hollow one like the one we got at headquarters.

[Nikki Porter]

Isn't there anything in it, Ellen?

[Ellery Queen]

No, it's empty. Dad, are you sure the cigarette with a document is safe at Center Street? This looks like the identical casing.

[Inspector Queen]

Can't be, Erie. I locked the evidence up myself.

[Ellery Queen]

Just the same, dad. Let's go back to headquarters and check up. Hurry, dad, hurry.

[Inspector Queen]

Yeah, Didn't I tell you any? Here's the Moose's dummy cigarette, just as I left it in the safe.

[Ellery Queen]

Let's see it, dad. Dad, this isn't a dummy.

[Inspector Queen]

It's a real cigarette tobacco, clear through my evidence. But I locked the dummy monogram cigarette in my safe two days ago.

[Ellery Queen]

Son, you only thought it was the dummy, dad. The switch must have been made before you locked this cigarette in your safe.

[Inspector Queen]

One of those crooks substituted a real Moose cigarette for the hollow one in your office two days ago and sprayed.

[Ellery Queen]

Exactly, dad. After showing the document to those people in your office, you replaced it in the hollow dummy and put the dummy on your desk, remember?

[Inspector Queen]

Oh, yes.

[Nikki Porter]

They all kept wandering around the office.

[Inspector Queen]

Yes. Would have taken only a second to make the switch of cigarettes. Hey, I know when the switch was made. When the rat screamed that somebody was going to shoot him.

[Ellery Queen]

Right, dad? And one of them came prepared to make the exchange.

[Inspector Queen]

But which one?

[Ellery Queen]

They all had cigarettes with them, Sergeant. The judge smoked incessantly. So did Ms. Wicker. Mr. Ernie, we know Boyne had cigarettes. His cigarette case was pierced by that rifle bullet.

[Inspector Queen]

Any of them could have made the switch two days ago.

[Nikki Porter]

But. But how did the stolen one get under Musso's body in Central Park? Ellis?

[Ellery Queen]

The thief must have brought it with him today to his appointment with his victim.

[Inspector Queen]

When I don't understand why he knocked the Moose off. Maestro.

[Ellery Queen]

It's not hard to reconstruct, Sergeant. The thief in possession of the vital evidence wanted money from Musso. Money in return for not handing that evidence back to the police.

[Nikki Porter]

Probably intended to milk them all dry one after the other. And started with the racketeer.

[Inspector Queen]

Yeah, and then figured he'd destroy the evidence. All right, so whoever stole that dummy cigarette in my office the other day is the killer of Musso.

[Nikki Porter]

But who?

[Inspector Queen]

Looks like a tough one to me, Ellie.

[Ellery Queen]

Tough? I don't think so, dad.

[Nikki Porter]

Now, Ellery, don't tell me you know.

[Ellery Queen]

Yes, Nikki, I know who stole the dummy cigarette and murdered the Moose. And there, ladies and gentlemen, you have the mystery and I hope, a solution as well. Nikki, will you be good enough to introduce our guest, armchair detectives for this evening?

[Nikki Porter]

Well, Ellery, our first guest tonight is Anne Corio, glamorous stage and screen star, who is currently making a record breaking tour of vaudeville theaters from coast to coast. Ms. Corio returns to Hollywood soon for her next film, Sarong Girl. Our second guest is Alpha D. McKelvey, prominent Eastern manufacturer And amateur radio detective. You know, Ellery, Mr. McKelvey's hobby is beating fictional radio detectives to the solution, so you'd better watch out. All right, Ellen.

[Ellery Queen]

Thank you, Nikki. Ms. Corio, who is the criminal?

[Nikki Porter]

Well, I. Rather difficult, but I think the rat stole the cigarette that he has been living in terror of Musso, and he did it to bribe him.

[Ellery Queen]

Have you any clues?

[Nikki Porter]

No, except that when the gun was shot off, he seemed to know just what was happening. And he made quite sure that the bullet hit Byrne and not himself. And I think that was all set up so that he could switch the cigarette.

[Ellery Queen]

Thank you, Ms. Corio. Mr. McKelvey, who do you think is the criminal?

[Inspector Queen]

Well, I've missed some easier guesses than this, so I'll probably miss this. But I guess that Phil Barnes did it because of the fact that he showed up in the office opposite the sharpshooter with a vest on, so that if there was any poor shooting, he was one fellow that wasn't going to be hit. He also happened to have a cigarette case in his pocket, so he could have been the man to make the exchange in the park. And being a politician, he probably knew his way out in the final analysis.

[Ellery Queen]

Well, thank you, Ms. Coryo. And, Mr. McKelvey, you'll know in just a moment how successful you were as armchair detectives. But first, here's Ernest Chappell, a very reasonable man indeed.

[Ernest Chapel]

Certainly I'm reasonable, Ellery. For instance, when I tell you folks to get two bottles of Bromo Seltzer, one to keep at home, the other where you work, I have two mighty good reasons. Firstly, you never know when a common sick headache will affect you. But you can depend on Bromo Seltzer to help you feel better fast. For Bromo Seltzer fights headache three ways. Acts on head, nerves and stomach. You get effective relief quickly. Feel more like your old self again. Reason number two for buying two bottles. Right. Now, there's a wonderful special on Bromo Seltzer. The regular, large, 60 cent size bottle for only 39 cents. Now, that means you save 20% or more. But remember, this offer is strictly limited both to time and quantity, so act at once.

[Inspector Queen]

Well, tell us, son. Was it Judge Lampson or that mouthpiece and skirts Fanny Wicker?

[Nikki Porter]

That lifting little appraiser, Ernie?

[Ellery Queen]

No, the thief of the evidence. And therefore the killer of Musso was.

[Inspector Queen]

Phil Boyne Boeing, that politician. The one that got hit by the rifle bullet by mistake.

[Nikki Porter]

But how do you know? Good Boyne. Elephant.

[Ellery Queen]

The clue in this case is psychological. But it's as incontestable as a fingerprint. Consider the situation in your office, dad. Two days ago, Musso, or one of his henchmen, in trying to kill a singing rat, fired a shot that struck Phil Bourne by mistake. How did Boyne react?

[Inspector Queen]

Like an old lady got his start.

[Ellery Queen]

Yes. Boyne was so shocked by his narrow escape from death, so unnerved that he blubbered like a scared child. Yet when, at the height of excitement, I offered him a cigarette, he refused it.

[Inspector Queen]

That's right, he did.

[Ellery Queen]

The judge, the rat, Counselor Wicker, Ernie, even you, dad and Nicky were all so shaken by the murderous attack that you gratefully accepted a cigarette to soothe your nerves. Yet Boyne, the man most immediately involved, the man who had actually been struck by the bullet, although unhurt, the man who threw a fit of hysterics. Boyne refused to smoke. Conclusion? Phil Boyne is not a smoking man. Phil Boyne doesn't smoke at all. If he were a smoker, even a light smoker, he would have grabbed at a cigarette in his condition.

[Nikki Porter]

But, Ellery, if Boyne isn't a smoker, why does he carry a cigarette case around with him? He did that day. You said yourself it was pierced by the rifle bullet.

[Ernest Chapel]

Yes.

[Ellery Queen]

Nicky, why did Boyne, a non smoker, carry a cigarette case? Since it wasn't because he smoked, then that case and the cigarettes in it must have served an entirely different purpose.

[Inspector Queen]

I see it now. Sir.

[Ellery Queen]

Yes, dad. We know one of Musso's specially monogrammed cigarettes was substituted for the hollow one with the evidence in it. Therefore, the thief must have come to your office with a cigarette he'd stolen from Musso in advance. In other words, the thief came prepared to make a switch of cigarettes if the opportunity arose. And which of the four suspects did come prepared? Obviously, the man who carried a cigarette case but didn't smoke. Dad, if you'll nab Pilboin right away, there's a good chance he still has that document with its precious evidence on him. And there, ladies and gentlemen, you have the solution to the mystery. I want to thank Ms. Ann Corio and Mr. Alfred McKelvey for appearing as guest armchair detectives this evening. And we have, for both Ms. Corio and Mr. McKelvey, a personal gift from Bromo Seltzer, also an autographed copy of my latest mystery anthology, Sporting Blood, and a subscription to Ellery Queen's mystery magazine.

[Ernest Chapel]

Hillary. I'm a man who comes to the point, chappie.

[Ellery Queen]

So am I. I know what that point you're going to make. And my answer is, you'll have to wait a minute to hear what next week's story is about.

[Ernest Chapel]

Well, it so happens that I can fill that minute with some mighty important information. You can take it straight from our educated Bromo Seltzer train friends. The time to try Bromo Seltzer is right now.

[Inspector Queen]

Listen, save money by now. Bromo Seltzer.

[Ernest Chapel]

Bromo Seltzer.

[Ellery Queen]

Bromo Seltzer.

[Inspector Queen]

Bromo Seltzer.

[Ernest Chapel]

Bromo Seltzer. Yes. Buy Bromo Seltzer now and you'll save 20% or more. For right now, your druggist is offering the large 60 cent size bottle of Bromo Seltzer for only 39 cents. This offer is good for a limited time only, so act at once. Remember, Bromo Seltzer fights headache three ways. These three ways. Quick relief from headache pain.

[Inspector Queen]

Fast help for jumpy nerves. Quick help for upset stomach.

[Ernest Chapel]

So don't be satisfied with anything that does less for you than Bromo Seltzer. Use it only as directed on the label. For frequent or persistent headaches. See your doctor for quick, effective relief from common sick headache. Get tried and true Bromo Seltzer. And be sure to ask for the large 60 cent size bottle now selling at the special low price of only 39 cents.

[Inspector Queen]

Save money by now.

[Ernest Chapel]

All right, Sherlock Holmes, come on. What's on tap for next week?

[Ellery Queen]

Funny you should call me that, chappie.

[Ernest Chapel]

How so?

[Ellery Queen]

Well, because next week I'm going to tell about a case I had which will remind you of one that baffled the great Sherlock himself. It's about a man who goes into his house for an umbrella and disappears. I call my case the adventure of Mr. Short and Mr. Long. Be sure to listen next Thursday at this same.

[Ernest Chapel]

And don't forget the other great promo Celsius show, friends. Vox Pop, the show that travels America. Next Monday, Vox Pop travels to bowling field in Washington. Fox Johnson and Warren Hull will interview men of our Army Air Force. Consult your local paper for the time and station music for the Adventures of Ellery Queen is by Charles Paul.