
Family Doctor 32-xx-xx 05 Once to Every Boy
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A
Hello there. This is the family doctor.
B
Hello.
A
This is doctor. Oh, oh, hello, honey. Yes, Lou, as I remember. Yes, I've got it right here on my desk. Wait a minute. Yes, here it is. Yes, I know, honey. I'm to take this bottle of pickled peaches to the Bensons. Yes.
C
Huh?
A
Oh, the Maynard. I see. Yes, honey, I seem to recollect you're saying something about the Maynards now. All right, all right. Yes, I'll take it right over when I leave here. All right, Lou. Goodbye. No, no, I won't forget. I'll hold it in my lap all the way home. I mean, all the way to the Maynard. All right, all right, honey. Goodbye. Deary me. She even phoned Mrs. Maynard to tell her I was bringing the pickled peaches over. Sort of putting me on the spot. As they say in the movies, gosh to Friday. Great little woman. Just what I need.
D
Hey, Jimmy, the drugstore is empty. Nobody's here.
E
Oh, they're probably in the back.
D
I hope Johnny's here instead of Pete.
E
Yeah, boy, I hope so too. Call out, why don't you?
D
Okay.
C
Hey, Johnny.
B
He ain't here.
D
Oh, heck, it's pete.
C
It's us, Mr. May. Billy and Jimmy Maynard.
B
Oh, hello boys.
E
Hello.
B
How's your father, the Reverend?
E
Fine.
B
And your mother?
C
Fine.
B
That's good. Well, what can I do for you boys?
C
We want a pint of vanilla ice cream and a pint of strawberry.
B
Ooh, have them company to your house, are you?
E
Ma says Dr. Adams is coming over to visit this afternoon and she's got to have some ice cream.
B
All right, boys, you can't say that Pete May don't take care of his customers. That's why there's only one drugstore in Cedarton. All the rest of them are scared.
E
To put up the dummy. Ask him.
D
Oh, wait a sec, will ya? You gotta take your time in things like this.
B
Yes, sir. And a pint of strawberry coming up. Yes, sir. There you are, boys.
C
How much is it, Mr. May?
B
Oh, 45 cents, I reckon.
C
It isn't 50, is it?
B
Well, no, I said 45, didn't I?
C
Okay, here's four bits. And we want the best five cent cigar you got.
E
Yeah, yeah. You see, dad, he wants it.
B
The Reverend. Reverend Maynard wants a cigar.
C
Yep, he wants it.
B
What for?
C
To smoke, of course.
B
You mean to say the Reverend Maynard's taken up smoking?
E
Oh, sure. He's been doing it for a long time.
C
Only. Only you don't want anybody to know about him.
B
Well, I'll be plowed for a furret, you don't tell. Well, what kind does he smoke, boys?
C
I don't know exactly, Just. Just the best 5 cent cigar I got, I guess. One that ain't too. Too.
E
One that ain't too strong, he means.
D
Yeah.
B
Well, something tells me this ain't right. Selling tobacco to miners. But seeing as how you're the Reverend Maynard's boys, I'll give it to you. Here you are.
C
Gee, thanks, Mr. Mace.
E
Well, so long. Be seeing ya.
B
Well, what do you know? The Reverend Smokin and a nickel cigar at that. I never would have thought it.
F
Well, how do you do, Dr. Adams? I'm awfully glad to see you. Well, come on in. Mr. Mina's in his study. I'll call him Glenn. Oh, Glenn.
E
Yes, Virginia?
F
Dr. Adams is here. Won't you come in? He's preparing his sermon.
A
Well, maybe you shouldn't have bothered him.
F
That's perfectly all right. He's almost finished.
G
Well, Grant, hell, I'm glad to see you.
A
Hello, Glenn.
F
Won't you come into the parlor?
B
Thank you.
G
Well, Grant, you caught me at work.
A
Here goes it.
G
Most people think a preacher only works on Sunday, but let me tell you, it's a seven day a week job just like yours. You doctors can't put anything over on us preachers.
F
Now, sit down, please. Well, doctor, how is Mrs. Adams? I didn't see her in church last Sunday.
A
No, she drove out into the country with me. Oh, yeah. Lou used to be a registered nurse, you know, and she helped me out whenever I, I.
G
My goodness, Virginia, what is that?
E
You are. No.
F
By this time, Glenn, it's just the twins arriving. I hope you excuse them, Doctor.
A
Of course.
E
Here's your ice cream.
F
All right now. All right. Don't you say how do you do to Dr. Adams, boys?
C
How do you do, Dr. Adams?
F
You go out and play until I call you for supper. But stay around here where you can hear me.
C
Okay, Ma. Come on, Jimmy.
E
You still got it?
D
Of course I got it. What do you think I ate it?
E
It isn't broke, is it?
D
No, it's okay. Come on, we'll go to the shed.
E
Hey, you got a match?
C
No, I almost forgot.
D
I get one from the kitchen.
C
No, no. Get a handful.
E
Okay. Okay, I got him.
D
Come on then.
E
Let'S see it. Gee, it looks kind of big, don't it?
C
Ain't too big for the two of us.
E
Well, maybe not.
C
Now, let me see. How does Judge Windsor bite off the end? Like this, I guess.
E
Yeah, that's it.
C
Golly, that Tastes funny. Nothing like a cigar smell.
E
Do you want me to light it for you?
C
Oh, no, no. You go first. I'll let you have it first this time, Jimmy.
E
Well, okay, then. Welcome back. That's fine. How does it smell, Billy?
C
Smell. Here, let me have it. Ain't that funny how it makes you cough? I mean, Judge Windsor don't cough when he smokes.
E
Let me try it again. Maybe I won't cough this time. No, see, I didn't cough.
D
Okay.
C
Here, I'll try. Tastes kind of like our hay mouth smelt when it burned down last summer, don't it?
E
Yeah, kind of.
C
Here. Here, you can have it again for a while.
E
Oh, no, you go ahead. I'll wait.
C
Well, okay.
E
Gee, Billy, you look kind of funny.
D
Do I?
C
Here, you take it.
E
Okay.
C
How. How do you feel?
E
Well, I feel all right. I. I guess. Say, Billy, let's throw this away, huh? I'm kind of tired of it, aren't you?
D
Yeah, kind of.
C
Maybe we ought to bury it.
E
Okay. That's a good idea. I'll dig a hole. Throw her in. No, no, no. You cover it up.
C
Hey, Jimmy.
E
Yeah?
C
What do you say we. We go up to our room and go to bed, huh?
E
Okay. I think that's a swell idea. Come on. Gee, are you as dizzy as I am?
D
Dizzy?
C
Of course I ain't dizzy.
E
Gee, Billy, you fell flat on your.
F
Well, Dr. Adams, I'm awfully glad you dropped over. Come again, won't you? And drop over with Mrs. Adams some evening.
A
Thank you. Thanks very much.
G
Yes, Grant, I hope that you.
F
Glenn, come on upstage.
G
What is it, Mother? What in the world has happened? I wonder.
B
Well.
G
Mother.
E
Yes, Glenn?
G
I. I think this is a case for Dr. Adams and myself. You'd better wait in the parlor.
F
Well, just as you say, Glenn.
G
Well, Doctor.
A
Hello, boys. Oh, doctor, you don't feel sick, do you?
C
No.
A
Let me feel your pulses both at the same time as I know these symptoms. You know, Reverend, the best cure for this is a good dose of food. Food? Yes, I'd suggest some oyster stew, followed quickly by scrambled eggs. And then ending up with nice dessert.
B
Of waffles and syrup.
A
Ah.
G
Well, I'll get that for them right away, Doctor.
A
And I think I'd better hurry down to Mays drugstore and get a bottle of castor oil. Oh, yes. Yes, Doctor.
G
Yes, I'll go right with you, Doctor. Come on, Grant. Let's break the news to their mother.
E
Oh, what is it, Graham? It isn't Serious, is it, Dr. Adams?
A
Well, I'm afraid it is, Mrs. Maynard.
G
You must prepare yourself. Mother.
E
Oh, Doctor, what is it?
A
Cigaritis.
E
Oh, no. My baby.
G
Mother, you may as well know it now as anytime. The twins are growing up. They're 13 years old.
A
This is the family doctor. I'll be in to see you again right soon. Goodbye.
Podcast: Harold's Old Time Radio
Host: Harolds Old Time Radio
Episode Date: August 27, 2025
Episode Theme:
A charming slice-of-life drama set in a small town, this episode of The Family Doctor explores childhood mischief, generational relationships, and the subtle lessons of growing up through a gentle, humorous incident involving two young boys, their family doctor, and the local community.
The episode centers on Dr. Adams, a beloved town doctor, and a memorable day in the Maynard family's life. The twin Maynard boys, inspired by adult behaviors, attempt to smoke a cigar in secret, leading to humorous (and mildly alarming) consequences. The episode gently addresses themes of innocence, curiosity, the rites of passage for young boys, and the warm support of family and community.
On the nature of community gossip and parental ‘cover-ups’:
Boyhood Innocence:
Tongue-in-cheek Medical Diagnosis:
The episode is warm, gently humorous, and nostalgic, with a focus on close community bonds and the little dramas of everyday family life. Dialogue is playful, with characters poking fun at each other in a friendly, loving way. The core moral is implied rather than stated, fitting the period's storytelling style: youthful mistakes are a part of growing up, best met with patience, good humor, and a steady hand.
Closing Note:
This classic radio episode offers wholesome entertainment, a window into small-town American life, and a timeless vignette about coming of age. Even listeners unfamiliar with old-time radio will find its gentle humor and heartwarming lessons enduring.