Father Brown 85-01-06 (04) The Invisible Man

Summary

Harold's Old Time Radio

Episode: Father Brown 85-01-06 (04) The Invisible Man
Release Date: April 17, 2025

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Introduction

Father Brown 85-01-06 (04) The Invisible Man transports listeners to the Golden Age of Radio, presenting a gripping adaptation of G.K. Chesterton's classic detective stories. Adapted by John Scottney and featuring Andrew Sachs in the titular role, this episode delves into a mysterious case involving love, deception, and the elusive "Invisible Man."

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Setting the Scene

The episode opens with Eileen Tully and Anthony Hyde engaging in a light-hearted exchange, setting a festive yet tense atmosphere. Their conversation quickly shifts to the central plot when Anthony, portraying Mr. Angus, declares his intention to marry Eileen under unusual circumstances.

• [00:00-00:31]
  Anthony Hyde: "The Father Brown Stories by G.K. Chesterton we present the Invisible Man."

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Introduction of Conflict

Mr. Angus's sudden romantic proposal is met with confusion and skepticism. Eileen, revealing her troubled past involving two undesirable suitors—Isadore Smythe and James Welkin—expresses her reluctance to marry anyone she finds unattractive.

• [01:17-07:30]
  Eileen Tully: "My father owned a name. The Red Fish at Lobby... I married them both... It was very silly... I never meant to marry anyone."

Eileen recounts her experiences with Smythe and Welkin, highlighting their odd behaviors and her desperate attempts to avoid marriage, which inadvertently led to further complications.

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Escalation of Mystery

The plot thickens as Eileen receives alarming letters from Smythe and notices suspicious activities linked to Welkin's inventions, such as the "Smythe Silent Circle" service. Anthony's suspicions grow, indicating that Smythe and Welkin might be up to something nefarious.

• [07:42-10:06]
  Eileen Tully: "About a fortnight ago, I got a letter from Smythe... These machines, whatever they are, they're making him pots of money."

The introduction of modern (for the time) gadgets like vacuum sweepers and electric refrigerators adds a layer of intrigue, suggesting a deeper conspiracy.

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Arrival of the Invisible Man

Michael Drew introduces himself as Mr. Isadore Smythe, revealing himself to be an inventor with grandiose ideas about replacing domestic servants with machines. His interaction with Anthony escalates the tension, leading to threats and mysterious occurrences within the tea room.

• [09:09-16:35]
  Michael Drew (Isadore Smythe): "Machines of which the machines I manufacture are but the primitive ancestors... the new golden age without slavery."

Smythe's obsession with machinery and his disdain for traditional labor hint at his potential motives and instability, setting the stage for the mystery.

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Father Brown Enters the Scene

As the mystery unfolds with unexplained footprints and the appearance of Smythe and Welkin simultaneously, Father Brown steps into the narrative. Played by Andrew Sachs, Father Brown brings his signature analytical prowess to unravel the complexities of the case.

• [21:05-25:49]
  Andrew Sachs (Father Brown): "They never noticed. And Ms. Laura, there was something you said which wasn't true."

Father Brown elucidates the concept of the "mentally invisible man," explaining how societal oversight allows certain individuals to go unnoticed, which Smythe exploited to commit his crimes.

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Climax: Unmasking the Invisible Man

The investigation reaches its peak as Father Brown deduces that James Welkin, disguised as a postman, was the true "Invisible Man." His ability to blend into society unnoticed enabled him to commit the murders without raising suspicion.

• [25:21-28:37]
  Andrew Sachs: "He entered Himalayan Mansions under eight human eyes... James Welkin was dressed as a postman."

This revelation underscores the theme of perception versus reality, a hallmark of Chesterton's storytelling, highlighting how the most ordinary individuals can harbor the darkest secrets.

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Resolution

With Father Brown's insightful deductions, Welkin is apprehended. The community begins to understand the true nature of the threats they faced, while Eileen reflects on the consequences of her past decisions. The episode concludes with Father Brown reaffirming the importance of keen observation and moral integrity.

• [28:03-29:22]
  Andrew Sachs: "James Welkin was dressed as a postman... One day you might be replaced by a machine."

The resolution ties back to the initial themes of technology versus humanity, emphasizing the timeless nature of Chesterton's work.

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Notable Quotes

• Father Brown on Perception:

  • Andrew Sachs: "But there can't be no one in the street outside just after a letter has been delivered. And then, of course, there was the stamp paper."
    [24:59]

• Father Brown on Societal Oversight:

  • Andrew Sachs: "They never noticed. And Ms. Laura, there was something you said which wasn't true."
    [25:12]

• Isadore Smythe on the Future:

  • Michael Drew: "It will be the new golden age. With a golden age without slavery."
    [12:28-12:37]

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Characters

• Father Brown (Andrew Sachs): The astute and compassionate detective who unravels the mystery with his profound understanding of human nature.
• Eileen Tully (Eileen Tully): A woman with a complicated past, torn between her desires and societal expectations.
• Mr. Angus (Anthony Hyde): Eileen's suitor, whose genuine intentions become central to the unfolding mystery.
• Isadore Smythe (Michael Drew): An eccentric inventor whose obsession with machinery leads to dangerous consequences.
• James Welkin (Olivier Pierre): The seemingly nondescript man who harbors a sinister agenda as the true "Invisible Man."

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Themes and Insights

• Visibility and Perception: The concept of the "Invisible Man" serves as a metaphor for how individuals can be overlooked or underestimated based on societal biases.
• Technology vs. Humanity: Smythe's inventions symbolize the fear of technology replacing human roles, a theme still relevant today.
• Moral Integrity: Father Brown embodies the virtues of honesty, empathy, and moral fortitude, emphasizing their importance in solving complex problems.

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Conclusion

The Invisible Man is a captivating episode that masterfully blends suspense, character development, and thematic depth. Through Father Brown's investigation, listeners are invited to ponder the unseen forces that influence human behavior and societal structures. This episode stands as a testament to the enduring legacy of old-time radio storytelling, bringing timeless narratives to modern audiences.

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Next Episode Preview:
Honor of Israel Gao – Father Brown examines the remnants of a battered corpse, delving into themes of justice and redemption.

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End of Summary

Transcript

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[Anthony Hyde]

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[Eileen Tully]

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[Anthony Hyde]

The Father Brown Stories by G.K. chesterton we present the Invisible Man Adapted by John Scottney with Andrew Sachs as Father Brown.

[Eileen Tully]

Our tidings of comfort and joy. Comfort and joy Our tidings are comfort and joy. God rest you merry gentleman. Let nothing you just.

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh.

[Eileen Tully]

Merry Christmas, Mr. And to you. Oi. Penny for the weights.

[Anthony Hyde]

Weights? What weights? There's only one of you.

[Eileen Tully]

Penny for the weight then?

[Anthony Hyde]

Penny for the guy? That'd be more appropriate. Christmas isn't for another week.

[Eileen Tully]

Yeah, no. Screw.

[Anthony Hyde]

Well, so here you are then. Invested wisely.

[Eileen Tully]

Sixpence. Thanks, guv. Thanks very much. Merry Christmas, mister.

[Anthony Hyde]

Merry Christmas.

[Eileen Tully]

Show off.

[Anthony Hyde]

Merry Christmas, Mrs. Wilkins.

[Eileen Tully]

Oh, shoe, Mr. Angus?

[Anthony Hyde]

Yes, I'm afraid so. It's snowing again out there in a bitter wind.

[Eileen Tully]

Oh, really, Mr. Angus.

[Anthony Hyde]

My word, those plum puddings look absolutely deadly. Oh, Mr. An. Look, I'll just pop through to the tea room for a warming cup of your delicious coffee.

[Eileen Tully]

Well. Oh, Mr. Angus.

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh, Laura. Alone at last.

[Eileen Tully]

And what would you like, Mr. Angus?

[Anthony Hyde]

Ah, the blessed ghastliness of Mrs. Wilkins patisserie. It makes her tea room such a haven of privacy. A small cup of black coffee, please. How much are the coconut kisses?

[Eileen Tully]

A penny. A penny?

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh dear. Can't afford it. I'll have to have a real kiss instead.

[Eileen Tully]

John, don't. Mrs. Wilkins will see. I'll get your order.

[Anthony Hyde]

Hello, Mrs. Wilkins. Oh, that Mr. Angus. I might have known her idea of Christmas decorations would be holly. Extremely prickly holly. Not a twig of mistletoe. Hey, Mrs. Wilkins.

[Eileen Tully]

She'll throw you out. Here's your order. Will that be all?

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh, just one thing more. I want you to marry me.

[Eileen Tully]

Those are jokes. I don't allow.

[Anthony Hyde]

No, really, truly. I'm being perfectly serious for once in my life. As serious serious as the hate me bun.

[Eileen Tully]

A hate penny bunny.

[Anthony Hyde]

Marriage is expensive, like the bun one pays for. Is indigestible, like the bun. It hurts, John.

[Eileen Tully]

There's Something I must anyway. What will your uncle say?

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh, who cares? Look, the old admiral cut me off without a penny years ago on account of my gross and irredeemable socialism. That's how I became a poor starving artist. Well, a rather inadequately paid newspaper illustrator, actually. I repeat, I'm being perfectly serious. I've even saved money. I have sold my soul. I've drawn nothing for weeks but jolly robins, jolly fat little men with sacks and white beards, jolly reindeer, jolly candle, jolly holly. I've bought you a ring. Look.

[Eileen Tully]

Oh, it's lovely. Oh, John, you are serious. Only. Oh, this is terrible. You don't give me time to think.

[Anthony Hyde]

Ah, I'm not such a fool.

[Eileen Tully]

There's something I must tell you. I've got a break in half an hour. Where can we meet?

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh, the usual place in the park.

[Eileen Tully]

But it's snowing.

[Anthony Hyde]

We'll build a snowman.

[Eileen Tully]

Hello, John.

[Anthony Hyde]

Hello there. One snowman. Nearly finished. You haven't got a pipe and a carrot about you, have you? To finish him off, Mr. Angus, before.

[Eileen Tully]

There'S a minute more of this nonsense. I must tell you something about myself as shortly as I can. It's nothing I'm ashamed of, but it's. It's a nightmare.

[Anthony Hyde]

What now?

[Eileen Tully]

My father owned a name. The Red Fish at Lobby. I used to serve behind the bar.

[Anthony Hyde]

Ah. I always knew you were reared among nobler beverages. And tea and coffee.

[Eileen Tully]

Look, do you mind if we walk? We're freezing.

[Anthony Hyde]

Right.

[Eileen Tully]

Lob is a sleepy little hole tucked away in the worlds. The only people who ever came to the Redfish were the usual commercials and men who had nothing better to do than lean about in a barroom and bet on horse.

[Anthony Hyde]

Sounds quite idyllic. The exotic strangers and the sport of kings. Now for myself.

[Eileen Tully]

Oh, do hold your tongue and listen. There were two of them in particular. Really? I was a bit sorry for them. It was so unattractive. One was very small. A tiny little man. He had little bright black eyes like a bird's. And he was curiously clever at all kinds of things, like making a jumping kangaroo artifact cigars. Or getting 15 matches to set fire to each other like a regular firework. Isadore Smythe, that was his name.

[Anthony Hyde]

And the other one, was he by contrast enormously tall?

[Eileen Tully]

He was quite tall. He had light coloured hair. I think that was what was so dreadful about him. He was so completely nondescript. A dreary, silent, ordinary man. James Welkin was called. He never did anything except soak in our bar parlour. And go for long walks by himself in the dull, grey hills all around. So I was startled and very sorry when they both. They both offered to marry me in the same week.

[Anthony Hyde]

Good Lord. Did you marry them both?

[Eileen Tully]

I did. A very silly thing. I had a horror of their realizing. I refused them because I found them both so impossibly unattractive. So I made up some gas about never meaning to marry anyone who. Oh, it sounds ridiculous, but I was very young. Anyone who hadn't carved his own way in the world. Two days later, the old trouble began. I suddenly heard that both of them had gone off to seek their fortunes. As though they were in some silly fairy tale.

[Anthony Hyde]

And now they've come back from the gold fields of Australia with red shirts, huge mustaches and sacks full of halftime nuggets.

[Eileen Tully]

Not quite. What time is it?

[Anthony Hyde]

Half past.

[Eileen Tully]

I must be getting back. Come on. We must hurry.

[Anthony Hyde]

Wait a minute. What happened?

[Eileen Tully]

About a fortnight ago, I got a letter from Smythe. And this last week he's come in the tea room twice.

[Anthony Hyde]

What?

[Eileen Tully]

I suppose you've seen all the hoardings. All about this Smythe Silent Circle service.

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh, yes, I know. Turn a switch, A housemaid who doesn't flirt, set a dial. A cook who is never crossed.

[Eileen Tully]

All kinds of fancy machines for doing the housework. Vacuum carpet sweepers, steam washing machines. Electric refrigerators, electric kettles. Well, anyway, these machines, whatever they are, they're making him pots of.

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh, all right. Now, Laura, we're here, we're back, and we've still five minutes to spare. And there's something you haven't told me.

[Eileen Tully]

What?

[Anthony Hyde]

The other man.

[Eileen Tully]

Yes, you're right.

[Anthony Hyde]

Yes.

[Eileen Tully]

He's the one I'm frightened of. I haven't seen him. I've heard him. How it was just a few seconds before Smythe letter come through the door. I heard his laugh. I opened the door and there was no one there. Good Lord, I've forgotten how he laughed. It's one of the reasons I found him so unattractive.

[Anthony Hyde]

I say, that's rum.

[Eileen Tully]

Yes, it is, isn't it?

[Anthony Hyde]

No, I don't mean that, though it is, of course. I mean this here. Well, this paper stuck to the shop window. This thin strip. Do you know what it says?

[Andrew Sachs]

Smythe Shantab you. If you marry him, he will die.

[Anthony Hyde]

Who the devil are you?

[Eileen Tully]

Isadore.

[Michael Drew]

Sorry I startled you. It's these rubber sole shoes. One of my own products. They're very quiet, especially in the snow. And this gentleman, Laura.

[Eileen Tully]

Mr. John Turnbull Angus. Mr. Isadore Smythe.

[Michael Drew]

How do you do?

[Anthony Hyde]

How do you do?

[Michael Drew]

It is undoubtedly Welkin's writing, is it not, Laura?

[Eileen Tully]

Aye.

[Michael Drew]

I came to tell you that I too have heard from James.

[Eileen Tully]

Have you?

[Anthony Hyde]

Yes.

[Michael Drew]

Five times in the last fortnight. He's left threatening letters at my flat. Yet the porter swears he didn't see anyone in the least suspicious. And here he is pasted up some sort of data on public shop window while people in shop.

[Anthony Hyde]

So while the people in the shop were having their tea.

[Michael Drew]

Aye.

[Anthony Hyde]

Or rather. Well, the person in the shop was having his tea. There's only that little priest.

[Michael Drew]

What? Must speak to him.

[Eileen Tully]

What? Oh, yes.

[Michael Drew]

Can't do.

[Eileen Tully]

Oh, Mr. Angus.

[Anthony Hyde]

Evening, Mrs. Wilkins. I see trade is looking up a customer.

[Eileen Tully]

A guest.

[Olivier Pierre]

Laura.

[Eileen Tully]

I'll explain in a minute. Mrs. Wilkins, who?

[Michael Drew]

You will excuse me.

[Andrew Sachs]

Are you speaking to me?

[Anthony Hyde]

Could we. Could we have a word with you a minute, please, Father?

[Andrew Sachs]

Oh, well, yes, yes, certainly. If you marry him, he will die.

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh, dear. The thing is, Father, did you see anybody stick it up there?

[Eileen Tully]

I wonder what those little holes can be.

[Michael Drew]

It is probably stamped paper. Easy enough to get hold of and no one could possibly trace it. More important, though, Father, did you see anyone stick it there?

[Andrew Sachs]

No.

[Anthony Hyde]

No.

[Andrew Sachs]

Then I wouldn't. You see, I'm terribly short sighted and I was rather a long way away.

[Anthony Hyde]

I have perfect eyesight. Ah.

[Eileen Tully]

I assure you, I saw nobody.

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh, this is amazing. Well, if I were you, Smilo chap, I'd put the whole thing in the hands of some energetic private inquiry agents.

[Michael Drew]

Well, you're right, of course, but some of these private detective fellows are.

[Andrew Sachs]

Well, they're. Perhaps I may be able to help. I know an extremely clever fellow. His name's Flambeau.

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh, he's a foreigner.

[Andrew Sachs]

Yes. His office is in town, but his flat's not far away. Do mention me, Father Brown. It's only a few stops on the penny omnibus.

[Michael Drew]

Penny omnibus? Be done. I'll go in my car.

[Eileen Tully]

Go with him, John.

[Anthony Hyde]

Why?

[Eileen Tully]

He may need help.

[Anthony Hyde]

Now, look here.

[Eileen Tully]

No, don't worry. The threat's against Mr. Smythe. I don't against me. Remember? I know James Welkin.

[Michael Drew]

A designed car myself, Mr. Angus. As you see, it is extremely simple to drive anybody by. One and only need to employ chauffeur. It's remarkable to keep a servant, Mr. Angus.

[Eileen Tully]

Servant?

[Anthony Hyde]

No, I can't afford to.

[Michael Drew]

I can't afford to. I'm a millionaire. But I changed choose not to. My rival, I suspect. I should say our rival. Welkin. Yes. He was left a Little money. When I last saw him, he was drinking his play pretty deeply into that capital. I don't know what Laura told you.

[Anthony Hyde]

Well, she gave me a. Oh dear.

[Michael Drew]

Whatever Laura may have imagined, I always earned every penny I spent I had to. My parents there were already long dead. They've been servants of it all. Between them they earn 50 pound a year for a 12 hour day. Black leading grates, boiling laundry. Mind your backs heating up water on fire and carrying up for master's bath. Sweeping and dusting. It killed my mother.

[Anthony Hyde]

I'm sorry to hear it.

[Michael Drew]

Such drudgery is unnecessary. I believe that in 60, 70 years time save our by 1970, 1980 no one will need to employ domestic servants or to be employed as a servant. And the reason? Machines of which the machines I manufacture are but the primitive ancestors. It will be the new golden age. With a golden age without slavery. Obsolete animal. Oh, I get carried away. Ah, I'm stay where? Must be near. Nearly there. What's the address?

[Anthony Hyde]

Lucknow Mansions.

[Michael Drew]

How very odd. I live at Imalaya Mansions, just round Corney. Look, why don't you come up to my flat? I'll show you Wilkins letters and you can run round and get that Flambeau chap. Here we are. My flat. Well, avert your eyes.

[Anthony Hyde]

Beg your pardon?

[Michael Drew]

While I turn this combination lock to neutralize burger alarm system. Otherwise when I open door, bells will ring in here and in hall porter's office.

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh, I see.

[Olivier Pierre]

Good.

[Michael Drew]

Now we can go in. See electric light comes on as we enter. Come through to the kitchen.

[Anthony Hyde]

Shut the door. Oh yes Lord.

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[Anthony Hyde]

That'S T-R-Y-L-I-F-E-M-D.com battery paraphernalia. What's that?

[Michael Drew]

That is my electric knife sharpening and polishing machine.

[Anthony Hyde]

I say, I wouldn't half mind having one of those 33 guineas. 33 guineas? That's a bit steep.

[Michael Drew]

Costly. Like so many of my machines, it is at present vastly more expensive than the human servant it replaces. Oh, fortunately for me, my things are fashionable among the far sighted. Did you know that on King Edward's yacht he has no less than three electric refrigerators? One just for champagne.

[Anthony Hyde]

Really?

[Michael Drew]

Ah, here, here. Here are the letters. Living room is through there. Door, of course, is automatic. I just press this button here.

[Anthony Hyde]

And if you go to see her today, I will kill you. That's the last. And it came this morning. Aye. Look, have you a glass of whiskey? I think I need one. Of course.

[Michael Drew]

Watch this. I call it my invisible footman. You see the little rails on the floor?

[Anthony Hyde]

Yes.

[Michael Drew]

Now, look at that metal cabinet over there. I press this switch on the arm of my chair. Now, this one.

[Anthony Hyde]

Do I take a drink of it? Oh, Smythe. Smythe, are you all right?

[Michael Drew]

It's still experimental. I haven't got the circuits quite right. That's one disadvantage. A human thought. That mud explode in a blue flash and give off clouds of smoke.

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh, that was my uncle's butler. Look, if you don't mind, I think I'll forget about the whiskey and trot over to this Flambo fellow. Too sweet.

[Michael Drew]

Yes, yes. Right this way.

[Anthony Hyde]

Okay.

[Michael Drew]

Mr. Angus, I don't know how to.

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh, think nothing of it, old boy. Workers of the world unite, you know.

[Michael Drew]

Aye. May the best man win, eh?

[Anthony Hyde]

Look, look, I See you've got one of these spy hole things in the door. Smythe, I beg you, open this door to no one till I get back.

[Michael Drew]

Why?

[Anthony Hyde]

What? Cheerio, then.

[Michael Drew]

I'll put the alarm on to buy.

[Eileen Tully]

Champagne. Charlie is me name. Champagne drinking is me game.

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh, madam. Scrubbing away, I see. Yes, sir.

[Eileen Tully]

Scrubbing.

[Anthony Hyde]

Did you know that one day you might be replaced by a machine? Oh, good. Well, but for the moment, I want you to take this with my best wishes for a happy Christmas and a prosperous New Year.

[Eileen Tully]

Thank you, sir.

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh. Oh, thank you. And when I come back, I shall give you another half crown.

[Eileen Tully]

Another half crown?

[Anthony Hyde]

Yes. Because I want you to watch that door.

[Eileen Tully]

Yes.

[Anthony Hyde]

And if anyone tries to go in there, I want you to nip down in the lip and tell the hall porter immediately. Anyone. Do you understand? Yes, sir. Splendid. Compliments of the season.

[Eileen Tully]

Flipping toffs.

[Olivier Pierre]

Well, at least the snow has stopped.

[Anthony Hyde]

Yes.

[Olivier Pierre]

You see, I am from the south, Mr. Angus. I do not share your northern taste for winter weather. So you told Smile to open the door to no one.

[Anthony Hyde]

That's right.

[Olivier Pierre]

And you set the cleaning woman on sentry duty. What else?

[Anthony Hyde]

Well, I also warned the hall porter, of course. Oh, and the hot chestnut man outside. Oh, and best of all, there was a policeman outside. I explained everything to him and he agreed to keep guard.

[Olivier Pierre]

You did well.

[Anthony Hyde]

Thank you, Mr. Flambog. You see, there's the hot Chester right now. And that's the policeman with him. Who are the other two?

[Olivier Pierre]

It's Father Brown. Father Brown.

[Anthony Hyde]

Laura. Hello, Laura. Hello. What are you doing here? Oh, why have you brought this gentleman with you?

[Andrew Sachs]

Oh, Miss Laura insisted on coming. I should explain. She told me the whole story. And she thought she would tell Welkin if he turned up at Smyth's flat, that she had no intention of marrying Smythe. And I. Yes, I just tagged along to give her moral support.

[Michael Drew]

We've.

[Andrew Sachs]

We've only been here a couple of minutes. We came on the penny omnibus. Oh, do have a chestnut. They're very good.

[Anthony Hyde]

Awfully decent on you, sir.

[Andrew Sachs]

Oh, yes, Constable.

[Anthony Hyde]

Here we are. Thanks, sir.

[Eileen Tully]

And you didn't see anyone go in, did you, Constable?

[Anthony Hyde]

No, miss. Not a soul, sir. Good.

[Olivier Pierre]

Well, all seems well. We'll just go in and double check with the whole porter, and then we'll go up and see Mr.

[Anthony Hyde]

Smiles. I say.

[Andrew Sachs]

I say, Flambeau, take a look at these footprints.

[Olivier Pierre]

Which ones?

[Anthony Hyde]

These.

[Andrew Sachs]

These ones here going in. And these ones coming out.

[Anthony Hyde]

Oh, yes.

[Olivier Pierre]

They seem to be the same person. An extremely heavy man. Or he could be Carrying a load?

[Andrew Sachs]

Yes.

[Olivier Pierre]

Good firm stuff. A good workman. Like boots with hobnails. I read an excellent monograph on footprints when I was first setting up to be a detective. They're very clear.

[Andrew Sachs]

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. That's what struck me. I fear we may be too late. Let's see the hall porter. Would you come with us, Constable?

[Olivier Pierre]

Oh, yes. A very ingenious gentleman, Mr. Smythe.

[Anthony Hyde]

He rigged up this telephone system from.

[Andrew Sachs]

His room upstairs down here to my desk.

[Anthony Hyde]

Well, anyway, gents. Oh, and madam, you can take it from me. Nobody's been in since this young gentleman went away.

[Andrew Sachs]

Then what are these patches of melting snow leaving upstairs?

[Olivier Pierre]

Yes, yes. See, the snow has hardly melted, despite the warmth. Here. These footprints were made within the last few minutes. God.

[Anthony Hyde]

The invisible man.

[Olivier Pierre]

Father, you stay down here with Ms. Laura. Mr. Angus, will you come up with me?

[Anthony Hyde]

Of course. I better go with them, sir.

[Andrew Sachs]

Yes, Constable, Just a moment. Yes, sir, could I. Could I just have a word, please?

[Eileen Tully]

After the Brown.

[Anthony Hyde]

See, the wet marks lead straight to his door.

[Eileen Tully]

No one went in. Can I have me half crown now, sir?

[Olivier Pierre]

And see, look there. Fainter marks coming out. As Father Brown said, we may be too late.

[Eileen Tully]

What about me half crown?

[Anthony Hyde]

Smiley? Smiley, are you all right?

[Eileen Tully]

Two shillings and sixpence.

[Anthony Hyde]

I have to break the door down.

[Olivier Pierre]

There is an easier way, Charlie, isn't it? I have my skeleton keys.

[Anthony Hyde]

Be careful.

[Olivier Pierre]

What's the matter? Good. I haven't lost my touch.

[Anthony Hyde]

Well, that's strange. Smythe has an electrical alarm. He said he was putting it on.

[Olivier Pierre]

Yes, I know the kind of thing. There's usually a switch somewhere.

[Eileen Tully]

Ah, there.

[Olivier Pierre]

But it's off.

[Anthony Hyde]

Look, it's a tiny flat. I'll try the kitchen. You try the living room, would you?

[Olivier Pierre]

Yes.

[Anthony Hyde]

Mon Dieu. What's the matter?

[Olivier Pierre]

Look there on the carpet. A trail of blood. Someone must be wounded.

[Anthony Hyde]

But where's the body?

[Olivier Pierre]

I simply do not understand it. There are but four rooms, all of them we have searched thoroughly. The body must be somewhere. We must get Father Brown up here.

[Anthony Hyde]

What, the little priest?

[Olivier Pierre]

Yes, yes, we'll call him on that internal telephone thing. Yes, here it is. Hello. Is that the concierge? I mean, you know, the whole porter. That's good. Look, this is Mr. Flambeau, one of the gentlemen in Mr. Smythe's flat. Would you kindly ask Father Brown to come up? Oh, and the policeman? Yes, please. Ah, he's not there. Well, just Father Brown, then.

[Anthony Hyde]

Well, here we are, Father Brown.

[Andrew Sachs]

Ah, yes, I'm sorry about the policeman. I. I sent him off on an errand.

[Anthony Hyde]

Laura, why don't you come up here as well? It's not a pretty sight, you know.

[Eileen Tully]

I wanted to know what happened.

[Olivier Pierre]

Yes, well, so do we come through?

[Michael Drew]

Oh, thank you, sir.

[Olivier Pierre]

You'll notice, Father, the wet footprints, they come right into the flat.

[Anthony Hyde]

Yes, yes, but why were you interested in the footprints outside?

[Andrew Sachs]

Ah, yes. Well, there were the only ones that weren't partially obscured by snow. They were made after it stopped. Do you mind if I just potter about?

[Olivier Pierre]

No, no, no.

[Anthony Hyde]

Of course.

[Olivier Pierre]

Please go ahead.

[Anthony Hyde]

Ah.

[Michael Drew]

Ah.

[Andrew Sachs]

Now, this is interesting.

[Olivier Pierre]

What is it?

[Anthony Hyde]

We didn't think any of those papers were relevant.

[Andrew Sachs]

No, no, no, they're not. This. This one. This might interest you, Ms. Laura.

[Michael Drew]

Yeah.

[Eileen Tully]

Oh, thank you, Father.

[Olivier Pierre]

You pay all right at my.

[Anthony Hyde]

Come in, sir.

[Andrew Sachs]

Oh, yes, yes, yes, Constable, do come in.

[Anthony Hyde]

We arrested him as you suggested, sir.

[Andrew Sachs]

Well done, well done. You've acted very promptly.

[Anthony Hyde]

Thank you, sir.

[Olivier Pierre]

He confessed at once.

[Anthony Hyde]

We're going to drag the canal for the body. Good, good.

[Olivier Pierre]

But, sir, the little priest triumphs again.

[Anthony Hyde]

Look, would someone please excuse. Explain. You've caught the invisible man.

[Andrew Sachs]

Oh, only mentally invisible, Mr. Angus. You know how rich people never notice the presence of servants? They take them for granted. To them, they are invisible.

[Anthony Hyde]

Yes, but Smythe had no servants.

[Andrew Sachs]

Well, there are public servants as well as domestic servants. When those four honest people said that no one had gone into the mansions or the flat, they meant no one. They noticed. And Ms. Laura, there was some. Something you said to me which wasn't true.

[Anthony Hyde]

What I say, Father?

[Andrew Sachs]

No, no, don't be annoyed. She thought it was true. But there can't be no one in the street outside just after a letter has been delivered. And then, of course, there was the stamp paper.

[Olivier Pierre]

Look, I can't stand it anymore. Who is this fellow? What does he look like? What is the usual get up of a mentally invisible man?

[Andrew Sachs]

Oh, he's dressed rather handsomely in red, blue and gold. And in this striking and even showy costume, he entered Himalayan Mansions under eight human eyes. Yes, he killed Smythe in cold blood. After Smythe opened the door to him and he came down into the street again, carrying the dead body over his shoulder.

[Anthony Hyde]

Dear Father Brown, are you raving mad or am I?

[Andrew Sachs]

You're not mad. Only a little unobservant, James Welkin was dressed as a postman.

[Olivier Pierre]

So it was Welkin after all.

[Andrew Sachs]

See, nobody ever notices postman somehow. Yet they have passions like other men. And don't they carry large sacks where a small corpse can be stowed? Quite Easily. Have you ever noticed this, that people never answer what you say? They answer what you mean or what they think you mean. You say, suppose. Suppose one lady says to another in a country house, is anybody staying with you? The lady doesn't answer. Yes, the butler, the three footmen, the parlour maid and so on. Though the parlour maid may be in the room or the butler behind her chair, she says, there's nobody staying with us. Meaning nobody of the sort, you mean. But now, suppose a doctor inquiring into an epidemic asks who is staying in the house. Then the lady will remember the butler, the parlour maid and the rest. All language is used like that. You never get a question answered literally, even when you get it answered truly. And when these four quite honest people said that no man had gone into the mansions, they didn't really mean that no man had gone into them. They meant no man whom they could suspect of being your man. A man did go into the house and did come out of it, but they never noticed.

[Eileen Tully]

Absolutely horrid. Let's talk about something else. Oh, look here. Smythe's Patent Waste Disposal System. The dustman. You don't have to tip. Let's try it. This paper will do. Here's the button.

[Olivier Pierre]

Extraordinary.

[Eileen Tully]

And now, Mr. Angel.

[Anthony Hyde]

Yes?

[Eileen Tully]

Don't you find it close in here?

[Anthony Hyde]

Close?

[Eileen Tully]

Would you care for a walk in the park?

[Anthony Hyde]

Yes. Oh, yes. Yes, very much. Excuse us, gentlemen. Excuse us.

[Eileen Tully]

Goodbye, Mr. Flambeau.

[Olivier Pierre]

Mademoiselle.

[Eileen Tully]

Father Brown.

[Andrew Sachs]

Oh, goodbye, Miss Laura.

[Olivier Pierre]

Now, tell me, Father Brown, what was on the paper?

[Anthony Hyde]

Huh?

[Olivier Pierre]

I thought you said it was important. Yet she threw it away.

[Andrew Sachs]

Yes. Yes, it could have been important to some people, I suppose it was. Isadore Smythe's will. He left her everything. One and a half million pounds.

[Olivier Pierre]

One and a half million.

[Andrew Sachs]

But I don't think Miss Laura would wish to be wealthy. After all, didn't she say she was determined that the man she would marry would. What was the phrase? Would have to carve his own way in the world? What a challenge for young Mr. Angus.

[Anthony Hyde]

In the Invisible man by G.K. chesterton. The part of Father Brown was played by Andrew Sachs, Flombo Olivier, Pierre Laura, Eileen Tully, John Turnbull Angus Anthony Hyde, Isadore Smythe, Michael Drew, Mrs. Wilkins and Charlady Margot Boyd, Policeman Peter Aker Urchin Melinda Walker. The Invisible man was adapted by John Scottney and directed in Bristol by Alec Reid. Next week's story is the Honor of Israel Gao, in which Father Brown surveys the remnants of a battered corpse and talks of money.

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