
Gasoline Alley 48-12-17 (23) The Adventure of the Agitated Announcer
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Styles MacKenzie
We interrupt this program to bring you an important Wayfair message. Wayfair's got style tips for every home. This is Styles MacKenzie helping you make those rooms sing. Today's style tip. When it comes to making a statement, treat bold patterns like neutrals. Go wild like an untamed animal. Print area rug under a rustic farmhouse table. From wayfair.com fierce. This has been your Wayfair style tip to keep those interiors superior. Wayfair Every style. Every home.
Gasoline Alley Announcer
Your auto light dealer presents your favorite friends from Gasoline Alley.
Skeezix Wallet
Hold it, Wilmer. Hold it till I get this phone.
Wilmer Bobble
Okay.
Skeezix Wallet
Skateac Wallet and Bobble Garage. Skeezix Wallet speaking.
Wilmer Bobble
What's that?
Skeezix Wallet
Yes, sir, we can fix it. We can fix anything on four wheels. Sure, we'll be waiting for you right.
Wilmer Bobble
Here in Gasoline Alley.
Gasoline Alley Announcer
Yes, it's Gasoline Alley, the comic strip that's a favorite in more than 100 great newspapers. In this episode, the adventure of the agitated announcer Skeezy Wilmer visit a radio station. The result? Well, it's quite a bit of consternation at first. A word from the friendly auto light dealer in your own hometown. And now, Gasoline Alley. Skeezigs has learned from past experiences. Experience. But when his partner, Wilmer Bobble, gets a big idea, the big idea usually pays off in plenty of trouble. And so, as Wilmer arrives at the garage for work this morning, what has he got? You guessed it, a big idea. Like so.
Wilmer Bobble
Hey, Skeezik, way to hear what I bought up for it. Boy, is this terrific.
Skeezix Wallet
Morning, Wilmer. You're late for work.
Wilmer Bobble
Late for work, he says. Listen, I work all night. Tossing and turning in bed.
Skeezix Wallet
Oh, I'm sorry. Something you ate?
Wilmer Bobble
Jesus. I was awake because I was thinking. I don't sleep well when I'm thinking.
Gasoline Alley Announcer
Oh, all right.
Skeezix Wallet
What's the big idea this time?
Wilmer Bobble
Sometimes, Skeezix, I almost get the feeling that you don't appreciate all I do for you. This will double our business. It'll triple it.
Skeezix Wallet
How much will it cost, Wilmer?
Wilmer Bobble
That's the beauty part of it. It don't cost a red nickel. Now, look, all we got to do to get more business than we can handle is to get a lot of free publicity. Simple.
Skeezix Wallet
Now, wait a minute, Wilmer. Getting publicity takes skill and experience.
Wilmer Bobble
That type of brain. And when it comes to brain, boy, I'm loaded.
Skeezix Wallet
All right, Brain boy, you're going to get a lot of free publicity for the garage.
Wilmer Bobble
But how? Very simple. Everybody likes a picture of pretty girls on bathing suits, right? Right. Okay, so we get some pretty girls on bathing suits here in a garage and we'll get their pictures in the paper. Now what do you say to that?
Skeezix Wallet
It doesn't matter what I say, Wilmer. But what will Jessica say?
Wilmer Bobble
Do you mean Jessica, your ever loving.
Skeezix Wallet
Wife with a strong right arm?
Wilmer Bobble
Well, on second thought, Skeez, maybe bathing beauties here in a garage ain't quite the right answer these days.
Mr. Whitby
Thief.
Wilmer Bobble
Say, cost too much to wasting a black eye.
Skeezix Wallet
So let's forget it, Wilmer, and get to work.
Wilmer Bobble
Oh, I'll think of another way. Don't worry about that. I'll hold it.
Skeezix Wallet
Wilmer, we've got a customer.
Wilmer Bobble
Hey, it's Mr. Whippy, the manager of the radio station.
Mr. Whitby
Hi, boys.
Wilmer Bobble
Hi, Mr. Whitby.
Skeezix Wallet
What can we do for you?
Mr. Whitby
Well, there's something wrong with the old bus.
Wilmer Bobble
Keith?
Mr. Whitby
Uh huh. She's hard to start. And then sometimes when she's rolling along, the motor goes dead on me.
Skeezix Wallet
Oh, it sounds like ignition trouble. You better let us have a look at it.
Wilmer Bobble
Sure, we'll have a fix in no time.
Mr. Whitby
Oh, that's fine, boys. When can I get it?
Skeezix Wallet
Well, unless we run into something unexpected, we should have it fixed up by 2:00 this afternoon.
Mr. Whitby
2:00? No, no, I couldn't. Come and get it then. This afternoon or two. I'll be holding auditions for the big community fun packet. We broadcast it, you know.
Wilmer Bobble
Oh, you sure had a swell show last year, Mr. Woodsby. Me and Jessica tuning in and we just howled.
Skeezix Wallet
You howled?
Wilmer Bobble
Yeah. Boy, was that funny.
Mr. Whitby
That's very strange. It wasn't supposed to be funny. As a matter of fact, it was quite serious.
Wilmer Bobble
Yeah, that's what I mean. It was quite serious. Yeah? Yes, Jessica and me, we nearly cried. It was beautiful.
Mr. Whitby
I see.
Skeezix Wallet
Mr. Whitby, I'll bet you've got a lot of good acts this year.
Mr. Whitby
Oh, we've got plenty of talent for the show, all right. But you seem to be stuck for a narrator.
Skeezix Wallet
Uh, a who?
Wilmer Bobble
Writer.
Skeezix Wallet
A narrator? Wilmer.
Gasoline Alley Announcer
The master of ceremonies.
Mr. Whitby
The head man.
Wilmer Bobble
Just a minute, Mr. Whitby. Just what does this narrator fella have to do?
Mr. Whitby
Why, the narrator's the most important part of the show, Wilmer. He introduces all the acts, keeps the audience happy between the acts and ties the whole show together.
Wilmer Bobble
That don't seem too difficult.
Mr. Whitby
Oh, it takes a man with a lot of personality and perfect diction. A man that can think fast on.
Wilmer Bobble
His feet takes brains. Tell me, Mr. Whitby, will this narrator feller get any publicity?
Mr. Whitby
Oh, yes, indeed. This picture will be in the paper almost every day. Oh, gosh, I've got to get down to the stage.
Wilmer Bobble
Picture in a paper every day, huh? Oh, Mr. Whitby. Yes, we'll learn. Don't worry about your car. As soon as we get it fixed, I'll take it down a radio station in person.
Mr. Whitby
Oh, thank you, Wilmer. Well, come on, boys.
Skeezix Wallet
Well, it's nice that you'd offer to do that, Wilmer.
Wilmer Bobble
Nice nothing, Skeevicks. I'm doing this for the publicity I'll get for the garage.
Skeezix Wallet
What do you mean by that?
Wilmer Bobble
Simple. When I get down to the station, I'll just audition for that narrator part also. I'll win it.
Skeezix Wallet
But, Wilmer, you heard Mr. Whitby say the narrator has to have perfect diction.
Wilmer Bobble
Sure, and that's exactly what I've got. I've won diction prizes. I've won gold medals for my diction only.
Gasoline Alley Announcer
Yes.
Skeezix Wallet
Only what?
Gasoline Alley Announcer
Only diction?
Wilmer Bobble
What is dictionary?
Gasoline Alley Announcer
Now, back to Gasoline Alley and the Adventure of the Agitated Announcer. Well, Wilmer has decided to give a radio audition in an effort to get the in the big annual Community Fund pageant, which is broadcast every year. Now the boys are at the radio station, music having come along to keep Wilmer out of trouble, she hope.
Skeezix Wallet
Wilmer, this is just another one of your harebrained ideas. You don't know a thing about announcing or public speaking. How can you possibly be narrator of the pageant?
Wilmer Bobble
Jesus, haven't you got any faith in me? I've got personality, haven't I? Well, I've got brains, haven't I?
Gasoline Alley Announcer
Well, fetish.
Wilmer Bobble
Look, if I get at the job, I mean, it will mean a lot of free publicity for the garage. It's not myself I'm thinking about, it's the business.
Skeezix Wallet
Yeah, yeah. When you get up on that podium in front of all those people, you'll get the business.
Wilmer Bobble
Yeah, that's what I was saying.
Mr. Whitby
I'll get the business.
Wilmer Bobble
Wait a minute. What do you mean? There's Mr. Whitby, the radio station manager.
Skeezix Wallet
Hello, Mr. Whitby.
Wilmer Bobble
Mr. Whitby. I'm here for my audition for the narrator's party.
Mr. Whitby
Oh, yes. Yes. Skeezix, did you get my copy?
Skeezix Wallet
Oh, we sure did, Mr. Whitby. Cleaned up your ignition trouble and put in a new set of spark plugs. It's purring like a kitten.
Wilmer Bobble
Mr. Whippy, I'm ready.
Mr. Whitby
Hm? Ready for what?
Wilmer Bobble
At the audition. The audition? You know, the audition.
Mr. Whitby
Oh, look, Wilma, an announcer's job isn't easy. We've brought it over and decided we want a really professional speaker for the pageant. Wow. Do you think you're professional?
Wilmer Bobble
Plus just show me that microphone and let me get calling.
Mr. Whitby
Oh, very well, Wilmer. Let's make it fast. Now, if you two boys will go into studio. Baby, not A, but B. I'll run around to my office and when you see the red lights on, you start.
Wilmer Bobble
Speaking just about anything.
Mr. Whitby
No, no, no, no, no. Here's the audition script I have in my pocket here. Now, this is a test of your concentration and your ability to speak. Under all circumstances. Don't let anything phase you or stop you until the red light goes off.
Wilmer Bobble
Oh, don't worry about me. Nothing is going to stop me.
Skeezix Wallet
I'm not going to like you.
Wilmer Bobble
Okay, when I get this job, maybe you'll change your tool.
Mr. Whitby
All right now, Wilmer, just go into the studio and when the red light goes on, I'll be listening in my office and I'll come back to the studio and tell you how it is.
Wilmer Bobble
Don't worry about me. It's an awesome racket. It sucks too. Come on, Stevens, let's go in.
Skeezix Wallet
No, no, Wilma, not that door.
Wilmer Bobble
That's Studio A. Ah, that's what he said. Studio A. He said, and I quote, Studio A.
Skeezix Wallet
Not B. I thought it was the other way around.
Wilmer Bobble
Stevens, don't try to confuse me. Let's go in. Buck, look, the red light is on. The red. The sign says on the air.
Styles MacKenzie
Hey.
Wilmer Bobble
What? On the air. In here. I know. I'm having an audition. Just want to Mr. Whitby's stretch to upstab me. I'm going on the air right now with my harmonic act.
Skeezix Wallet
Folks, for my first number today, I'm about to play the overture from Orpheus.
Wilmer Bobble
Oh, no, you don't. Get away my microphone, you. I'm going to do my audition for Mr. Whitley.
Mr. Whitby
Oh, wait a minute.
Wilmer Bobble
Maybe he's right. Maybe we are in the wrong. Let me handle this. I know what I'm doing.
Mr. Whitby
Yeah, so do I.
Wilmer Bobble
Oh, that's the way you want it? Okay, I'll show you. Ladies and gentlemen, we are assembled here to dedicate this monument to that eminent American, Wilmer J. Bob. No, no, no, no. I mean to say. Now, let's see. Don't interrupt me, will ya? Ahem. The theme of the pageant is to depict the growth of this fair metropolis. How it has grown. It has grown from a small hamlet to the thriving industrial center. Center it is today. Go back through the years with me friends, if you will, in your Mind's eye, heart.
Mr. Whitby
Hark.
Wilmer Bobble
Back, if you will, to those early days when this fair city of ours was a tiny omelet. I mean, Hamlet. I mean, Hamlet.
Mr. Whitby
You maniac. Get away from that microphone. Everybody in town is listening to you. You're on the air.
Wilmer Bobble
No, you don't, Mr. Whitby. You can't fool me. I know this is part of that pad test.
Mr. Whitby
What you need is a sanity test. You walked into the wrong studio. That gibberish that you were spouting has been going out over the air. The station flooded with telephone calls.
Wilmer Bobble
Awful. Oh, I'm good. Huh?
Mr. Whitby
Good, Will. The J. Babel. You set radio broadcasting back 20 years.
Skeezix Wallet
I'm sorry, Wilmer, but everybody seems to have been listening when you were on the air this afternoon.
Wilmer Bobble
I know. I'm the laughing stock of the town. Easy. Oh, gosh. Here comes Mr. Whitby. Oh, gosh.
Mr. Whitby
Wilmer. Wilmer, I've been looking all over the town for you.
Wilmer Bobble
Okay, Mr. Whitby, I'm ready to go to jail. Jail? Jail.
Mr. Whitby
Nothing here, my boy. Look at the Clarion. Depiction's on the front page.
Skeezix Wallet
Gosh, it says, Wilmer Bobble and funniest broadcast of the year. Wilmer, things aren't so bad.
Mr. Whitby
I'll say they aren't. Why, the station owner's already congratulated me. And, of course, Wilmer, we'll want you in the pageant.
Wilmer Bobble
Gosh. Mr. Whitley as narrator.
Mr. Whitby
Well, now, not as narrowly the. No, we're doing a Shakespearean theme which there are two lovers and a crown by public demand. Wilma, you're going to play the fool.
Gasoline Alley Announcer
Your Gasoline Alley friends will be back in just a moment. Now, a word from your own autolight dealer. And now, words about the next adventure in Dantolene Alley.
Mr. Whitby
Here's Skeezy.
Gasoline Alley Announcer
Oh, Wilmer, you look terrible.
Mr. Whitby
What's the matter?
Wilmer Bobble
I can't sleep. Skeezix. There's a guy next door keeps singing Locked in the Cradle of the Deep all night Long.
Skeezix Wallet
Well, don't you like the song?
Wilmer Bobble
Not the way he sings it. Let me tell you something, Steve. If that guy sings it once more, I'm going to rock him. And I mean rock.
Styles MacKenzie
We interrupt this program to bring you an important Wayfair message. Wayfair's got style Tips for Every home. This is Stiles MacKenzie helping you make those rooms sing. Today's Style tip. When it comes to making a statement, treat bold patterns like neutrals. Go wild like an untamed animal. Print area rug under a rustic farmhouse table. From Wayfair.com fierce this has been your Wayfair style tip to keep those interiors superior. Wayfair Every Style, Every Home.
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Podcast Summary: Gasoline Alley 48-12-17 (23) - The Adventure of the Agitated Announcer
Podcast Information
The Adventure of the Agitated Announcer centers around Wilmer Bobble, a creative and sometimes misguided character from Gasoline Alley, and his efforts to boost their garage's business through unconventional publicity schemes. This episode blends humor with classic radio charm, showcasing the dynamics between Wilmer, his friend Skeezix Wallet, and Mr. Whitby, the radio station manager.
The episode kicks off with Wilmer Bobble arriving late to the garage, excitedly sharing his latest idea to generate free publicity. He proposes attracting customers by featuring "pretty girls in bathing suits" at the garage, anticipating that their pictures in the newspaper will drive business without cost. Skeezix, ever the voice of reason, expresses doubt about the effectiveness and potential backlash of such a strategy.
Their conversation is interrupted by Mr. Whitby, who brings his malfunctioning bus to the garage. As Skeezix attends to the technical issues, Wilmer seizes the opportunity to offer additional help, praising last year's radio show and inadvertently revealing his desire to be more involved.
Wilmer learns that the radio station is seeking a narrator for the upcoming community pageant. Believing this is the perfect avenue for free publicity, he decides to audition for the role. Despite Skeezix's reservations about Wilmer's public speaking abilities, Wilmer confidently steps into the studio. However, his audition quickly spirals into chaos as he stumbles over his words and delivers a confusing monologue about Wilmer J. Bob, causing the audience to react negatively.
Contrary to expectations, Wilmer's disastrous audition becomes the talk of the town, earning him unexpected attention. The local newspaper hails his performance as "the funniest broadcast of the year," turning Wilmer into a beloved figure rather than a laughingstock. Recognizing the potential, Mr. Whitby invites Wilmer to participate in the pageant with a specific role, much to Wilmer's surprise.
Mr. Whitby assures Wilmer that his impromptu performance has garnered positive publicity, leading to Wilmer's inclusion in the pageant as the comic relief character. This outcome not only salvages the day but also provides the garage with the sought-after publicity, validating Wilmer's original intent albeit through unintended means.
The Adventure of the Agitated Announcer delivers a delightful blend of humor and heart, capturing the essence of the Golden Age of Radio. Through Wilmer Bobble's misadventures, listeners are reminded of the charm inherent in classic radio storytelling and the timeless appeal of Gasoline Alley’s beloved characters.
This summary encapsulates the key events and character interactions of The Adventure of the Agitated Announcer, providing a comprehensive overview for both longtime fans and newcomers to the Gasoline Alley series.