
Gleason and Armstrong xx-xx-xx (001) A Contract, a Car and a Long Trip Ahead
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Bob
Gee, Grandma, these hotcakes are certainly swell. I'm sure gonna miss your cooking when Jimmy and me start traveling. Just think, a whole year without any of your. Oh, I think that's Jimmy now. Hello, Jimmy. Everything's okay now, huh? Did you get the paper? It's Jimmy, Grandma. Come on in, Jimmy.
Jimmy
I don't want to come in. Sit out here. I want to talk to you.
Bob
What's the matter, Jimmy? Something wrong? Didn't you get the paper?
Jimmy
Yeah, I got it all right. That's what I want to talk to you about, Grandma.
Bob
Me and Jimmy's gonna sit out here on the porch a minute. I think I got enough breakfast. Them four stacks of hotcakes ought to hold me for a little while, I guess.
Jimmy
Ain't on a diet or nothing, are you?
Bob
I know, Jimmy. I ain't on a diet. I just.
Jimmy
Oh, never mind. Never mind, Jim. Sit down, Bob, and get a load of this.
Bob
What's happened, Jimmy? Didn't the old guy go through with a deal?
Jimmy
Now, Bob, look, I'm your pal, ain't I?
Bob
Sure.
Jimmy
Why, I don't want to see you get in no trouble, do I?
Bob
No. What happened?
Jimmy
You was kind of figuring on being part of that Frost family, wasn't you?
Bob
Yeah, sure. What's wrong with that?
Jimmy
Now, listen, that guy thinks we're a couple of thugs. He don't trust us. Do you want to get into a family like that? Well, you know that paper we was going to sign today and the old man was going to write it?
Bob
Yeah. Didn't he write it?
Jimmy
Yeah, he wrote it. He wrote, Everton. He wrote stuff on that paper you wouldn't ask a couple of boyglists to sign.
Bob
Why, Jimmy.
Jimmy
Now, listen. All we was gonna do was sign a contract to buy that lot of his to build a cipher station for ourselves, wasn't it?
Bob
Yeah, and then.
Jimmy
And then we was gonna have to look all over the gasoline stations in the United States so we would know how to put up a good one. That's what we was gonna do, wasn't it?
Bob
Yeah, but. All right, now, wait. He was gonna put in there about me getting to marry his daughter if we save up $2,000 while we was on a trip.
Jimmy
Ah, that's not important. But he's got that in there, too. And he's got in plenty about Iraq and his traveling agents for his patent tire puller. He didn't miss that.
Bob
Well, what then? That's all we wanted.
Jimmy
All right, just listen. That guy puts in morality clauses. Imagine that. Morality clauses. Just as if he hadn't known us all our lives. Just as if we was a couple of guys out of the ho school.
Bob
Oh, Jimmy, he didn't mean nothing by.
Jimmy
I tell you about that mug don't trust us. I ain't going through it no deal with no guy that don't trust us. I don't care so much for myself. But you've been a good kid all your life, and he knows it. Sure, but he don't need to put in all those morality clauses for my partner. He says in his contract that we gotta make that dough by our own honest efforts. Honest. Can you imagine that? Was we ever dishonest? I never see no medals on that guy for his integrity.
Bob
His what?
Jimmy
His integrity. His where he's telling the truth.
Bob
Oh, that.
Jimmy
Oh, yeah, and why don't I tell you another one? He says we can't involve ourselves in any scandal, morally or financially. Can you beat that? When I read that, I was all burned up. Not a deal, Zork. And I'm all thrown. I ain't going.
Bob
Oh, Jimmy, that's going pretty far, ain't it? We gotta go.
Jimmy
We ain't gotta go nothin of the kind. I'm gonna settle right down here in little old Elizabeth, New Jersey, and get my old job back driving the ice wagon.
Bob
Oh, but, Jimmy, there ain't no money in driving an ice wagon anymore. What? All these new electric.
Jimmy
I used to make plenty in the old days.
Bob
Yeah, well, maybe that's why Frost put in them morality clauses.
Jimmy
Is that so, Frost? I can get along with that guy. I don't need no morality clauses. So you think we was a couple of wantons?
Bob
What?
Jimmy
You think we was a couple of wantons?
Bob
Well, we are, ain't we?
Jimmy
We are what?
Bob
We're wanting what? Well, we're wanting a service station. We're wanting to take this trip. Gee, Jimmy, I'm wanting that girl too. Wanting her bad.
Jimmy
Oh, you don't understand. A couple of wantons. W, A, N, P. A couple of bad guys. Wantons.
Bob
Oh, yeah, yeah, I see that guy.
Jimmy
Frost, he's a bad egg. And he ain't gonna get what he's wanting either. What do you think of them apples? Well, Jimmy, honesty, morality, you and me. You think we was going around the country cracking safes?
Bob
Oh, now, Jimmy, you should know how to get so mad like this. Old man Frost is just looking out for his daughter. Gee, you'd do the same thing if you had a swell daughter like Elizabeth. Besides, Jimmy, we gotta go on this trip. We can't lay down now Gee, I promised Elizabeth. And besides, I made arrangements with Eddie Dolan to mow our lawn here for Grandma while I was gone. And besides, I got those new rubber soled shoes to wear on a trip. And besides.
Jimmy
Look, look, look. The girl loves you, don't she?
Bob
Yeah, sure, Jimmy. Why?
Jimmy
Well, if she loves you, and I ain't sure that she does, she'll understand. If she don't love you, it don't make no difference. And besides, you'll be right here. And you can't tell what that guy Frost will say about you when you get away, so you're better off not to go anyway.
Bob
Oh, we gotta go. I promised my grandma. And besides.
Jimmy
Besides what?
Bob
Well, besides.
Jimmy
Go on, go on. Understand I'm being patient. Would you?
Bob
Well, and besides, the man said it was an excellent opportunity and that he wouldn't do it for anybody except me. And then he said he'd throw the tools in. And. Well, then. Besides, I. You said we couldn't walk all around the United States.
Jimmy
And what's this? What's this?
Bob
Well, Jimmy, you said we couldn't walk around the United States, so you went.
Jimmy
And bought an automobile.
Bob
What?
Jimmy
You went and bought an automobile.
Bob
Well, I.
Jimmy
Before you get the contract signed.
Bob
Yeah, but you should before you get.
Jimmy
The option on the lot.
Bob
Yeah, but didn't you say.
Jimmy
Before you even ask me.
Bob
Well, not one out. Jimmy, didn't you say we couldn't walk around United States?
Jimmy
Did I ask you to buy an automobile with or without tools?
Bob
I didn't ask you. Did you ask me to buy an automobile? I asked you. Didn't you tell me we couldn't walk around the United States? That's what I asked you, Jimmy. Now, did you or didn't you say we couldn't walk around the United States?
Jimmy
The minute you start doing the thinking for us, we get in the jam. Look, now, look, if we're gonna make this trip around the United States, and I ain't saying that we are, I'll do the thinking.
Bob
Oh, look, Jimmy, just look.
Jimmy
Look at what?
Bob
Look at what's standing out at the crib. Look at that.
Jimmy
I seen it when I come up. There ought to be a law against people leaving junk around in the streets.
Bob
Oh, no, Jimmy, you're kidding. That's our automobile. I paid 35 bucks for it.
Jimmy
25 bucks of our dough for that.
Bob
Aw, Jimmy, look at it first. Look. Now, ain't she a Danny?
Jimmy
She might have been once. Just after the Civil War. I'll bet the general Plant will.
Bob
Nah, Jimmy, please. Quit your kidding. Will you? The guy said I was in first class shape. I drove it myself last night. Right up to the house, right up to the door. Here it runs.
Jimmy
Well, it don't look so good from here, but come on, let's get a load of it closer up.
Bob
Yeah, come on down by the curb and Come on. There now. There, see? Hey. Well, what do you think of it now, huh?
Jimmy
I've seen worse, but I can't remember where.
Bob
Hey, it's a model T. T?
Jimmy
Yeah. T for terrible.
Bob
Ah, please, Jimmy, will you not be kidding like that? Come on, get in. Sit down and see how nice and soft them seats are. You know, you're gonna be riding all over the United States in that. Go on, Jimmy, please get in, will you? Here, I'll open the door for you. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, gee, I. I guess I pulled the door off.
Jimmy
You guess you pulled the door off. You bounced it off my toe.
Bob
Excuse me.
Jimmy
For 25 bucks. 25 bucks and the door falls off the first time a human hand lays on it.
Bob
Oh, please, Jimmy, get in, will you? Oh, this is nothing. I can fix this. It's got nothing to do with the running of it. Get in, Jimmy, will you, please?
Jimmy
All right, all right.
Bob
There.
Jimmy
Well, it ain't so bad.
Bob
Now, come on, Jimmy, let's go on over to old man Frost and sign a contract, will you? Here, hold this door on your lap, will you?
Jimmy
Hey, did you notice the size of my lap?
Bob
No, why?
Jimmy
Oh, nothing. I was just wondering if we was gonna. You was gonna expect this lap of mine to hold of it and it falls off this car.
Bob
There you go again. Now, come on, let's go and sign a contract. Oh, and on the way, we can stop at the garage and get the tools.
Jimmy
What tools?
Bob
Well, the tools that the man threw in with the car when I bought it.
Jimmy
And you didn't get them?
Bob
Well, yeah, he just forgot to throw them in. Well, that is a. I forgot to get him when I got home. I didn't have him. That is, I forgot to look for him. I mean, a guy phoned up this morning and he said he forgot to give them to me, but if we'd stop by. He said he'd give me the tools.
Jimmy
For 35 bucks and he forgets the tools.
Bob
Well, I guess I was a little excited. Listen, Jimmy.
Jimmy
Yeah, it works.
Bob
Sure it would. Oh, boy, am I excited now. Here we go. We'll sign a contract and tomorrow we start on our trip all over the United States.
Jimmy
You better go by and get them tools. Something tells me we're gonna need them bad.
In this captivating episode of Harold's Old Time Radio, titled "A Contract, a Car and a Long Trip Ahead," listeners are introduced to the dynamic duo, Bob and Jimmy Gleason. Set against the nostalgic backdrop of the Golden Age of Radio, the episode delves into themes of trust, ambition, and the pursuit of the American dream. As Bob prepares to embark on a significant business venture, tensions rise between the two friends, highlighting the complexities of partnerships and personal aspirations.
The episode begins with Bob and Jimmy sharing a hearty breakfast with Bob's Grandma. Bob expresses his fondness for Grandma's cooking, hinting at the impending changes as he and Jimmy are about to embark on a year-long trip. However, Jimmy's unease quickly surfaces as he brings up concerns regarding a crucial contract they are set to sign.
Jimmy (00:27): "I don't want to come in. Sit out here. I want to talk to you."
Jimmy reveals that the contract, intended to purchase a lot from an individual named Frost to build a cipher station, contains unexpected and stringent clauses that raise red flags for him.
Jimmy (01:03): "You was kind of figuring on being part of that Frost family, wasn't you?"
The crux of Jimmy's concern lies in Frost's inclusion of morality clauses within the contract, which impose strict behavioral conditions on them.
Jimmy (01:58): "He puts in morality clauses. Imagine that. Morality clauses."
Jimmy's skepticism towards Frost intensifies as he perceives these clauses as a sign of Frost's distrust and possibly ulterior motives. He questions the necessity of such stringent terms, especially given their long-standing relationship.
Jimmy (02:43): "He says in his contract that we gotta make that dough by our own honest efforts. Honest. Can you imagine that?"
Bob, on the other hand, remains optimistic about the deal, emphasizing Frost's personal investment in their partnership.
Bob (04:07): "The guy said I was in first class shape. I drove it myself last night. Right up to the house, right up to the door."
Despite Bob's reassurances, the underlying tension between adhering to the contract and maintaining their autonomy becomes evident.
Undeterred by Jimmy's apprehensions, Bob proceeds with preparations for their ambitious trip across the United States. A significant part of this preparation involves the purchase of a Model T automobile, symbolizing their commitment to the venture.
The exchange surrounding the car highlights the frictions in their partnership:
Jimmy (06:17): "Look, now, look, if we're gonna make this trip around the United States, and I ain't saying that we are, I'll do the thinking."
Bob (07:06): "Hey, it's a model T. T?"
Jimmy (07:09): "Yeah. T for terrible."
Bob's investment in the car, despite its questionable condition, underscores his eagerness and perhaps a bit of naivety regarding the challenges ahead.
As the episode progresses, the friction between Bob and Jimmy reaches its peak. Jimmy accuses Bob of overstepping and making unilateral decisions without considering the potential pitfalls.
Jimmy (05:09): "Would you?"
Bob (05:27): "And what's this? What's this?"
Jimmy (06:08): "The minute you start doing the thinking for us, we get in the jam."
The climax of their disagreement centers around the unresolved issue of tools that were supposed to accompany the car purchase but were left out.
Jimmy (08:22): "What tools?"
Bob (08:23): "Well, the tools that the man threw in with the car when I bought it."
This oversight becomes a symbol of their larger miscommunications and differences in prioritizing the business venture versus personal relationships.
However, as tensions simmer, Bob's determination to honor his commitments begins to sway Jimmy.
Bob (08:48): "Well, I guess I was a little excited. Listen, Jimmy."
Jimmy (09:09): "You better go by and get them tools. Something tells me we're gonna need them bad."
In the end, despite their disagreements, Bob and Jimmy decide to proceed with signing the contract and preparing for their journey, setting the stage for their impending adventure.
"A Contract, a Car and a Long Trip Ahead" masterfully captures the essence of partnership dynamics, the allure of entrepreneurial ventures, and the inevitable conflicts that arise from differing perspectives. Through the engaging dialogue between Bob and Jimmy, the episode offers listeners a glimpse into the challenges and triumphs that define collaborative endeavors.
As Bob and Jimmy set their sights on the open road, navigating contractual obligations and personal ambitions, the episode leaves audiences anticipating the adventures and lessons that lie ahead for these endearing characters.
Jimmy (01:03): "You was kind of figuring on being part of that Frost family, wasn't you?"
Jimmy (01:58): "He puts in morality clauses. Imagine that. Morality clauses."
Jimmy (02:43): "He says in his contract that we gotta make that dough by our own honest efforts. Honest. Can you imagine that?"
Bob (04:07): "The guy said I was in first class shape. I drove it myself last night. Right up to the house, right up to the door."
Jimmy (07:09): "Yeah. T for terrible."
Jimmy (09:09): "You better go by and get them tools. Something tells me we're gonna need them bad."
This detailed summary encapsulates the key discussions, character dynamics, and pivotal moments of the episode, providing a comprehensive overview for both new listeners and longtime fans alike.