Podcast Summary: Harold's Old Time Radio

Episode: Jack Benny Program 37-11-28 (273) Jack Cooked the Turkey
Date: November 26, 2025
Main Theme: A classic episode of the Jack Benny Program, centered on Thanksgiving mishaps—particularly Jack’s attempt at cooking dinner for the gang and the continuing saga of his unreliable car.

Overview

This episode dives into the comedic chaos surrounding Jack Benny’s Thanksgiving dinner preparations and the resulting aftermath. The guests reminisce about their experiences at Jack’s dinner table, lampoon his questionable culinary skills, and take a memorable jaunt in his infamous Maxwell car, which once again becomes the butt of much humor. Throughout, the cast delivers fast-paced banter laced with physical and situational comedy, showcasing the show’s trademark style. Interspersed musical numbers add to the vintage radio charm.

Key Discussion Points & Highlights

1. Jack Benny’s Thanksgiving Dinner Fiasco

Light banter about teamwork and aging starts things off:
- “Don, can you imagine the both of us on a seesaw? Me way up in the clouds and you down on the good earth. Gee, it makes me dizzy.” (Jack Benny, 02:46)
Kenny and Phil thank Jack for hosting—enthusiastically (and sarcastically):
- Kenny is especially grateful, but, “Gee, everybody else had wine with each course. And you made me drink milk.” (Kenny Baker, 04:18)
- Jack: “Well, Kenny, you’re too young. Besides, milk is good for you. Milk goes with anything.”
- Kenny: “Doesn’t go with my brown suit.” (04:26)
The turkey saga:
- The turkey, a gift from Andy Devine, was legendarily tough. Jack boasts, “I cooked it with a blowtorch. That did it.” (Jack Benny, 04:43)
- Phil: “That’s a fine way to cook a turkey. Why didn’t you put it in the oven?”
- Jack: “I tried to, Phil, but it kept jumping out all the time.”
Mary’s barbed review:
- “We had everything from soup to bicarbonate of soda.” (Mary Livingston, 05:05)
- On the mashed potatoes, “They were so lumpy, Jack had to serve them in the sugar bowl.” (05:14)
More jokes about dinner:
- Mashed potatoes “so nice and tan” because they were cooked under a sun lamp.
- Turkey pieces came with surprises: “I got a neck with a collar button in it.” (Mary Livingston, 05:44)
- Heavy dinner rolls (“I had to jack mine up to butter it.” — Mary Livingston, 06:28)
- Jack’s wounded pride and kleptomaniac guests (“I had five people to dinner and six spoons were missing.” — Jack Benny, 06:42), with Kenny proudly confessing: “I took two.” (Kenny Baker, 06:56)

2. Phil Harris’ Musical Number

Performance: “You Can’t Stop Me From Dreaming.”
Tongue-in-cheek drama:
- Jack calls out Phil: “That was quite a surprise. I didn’t know you were going to slip in a solo there, did you, Kenny?” (Jack Benny, 09:11)
- Phil: “I’m mad at the piano player and he hates my voice.” (09:26)
- Jack: “Well, you certainly fixed him.”

3. Jack’s Infamous Maxwell Car & the Decision to Sell

Ongoing jokes about the car’s reliability and Jack’s frugality:
- Phil asks: “How’s the old tub behaving?”
- Jack: “Oh, it’s all right, Don. I’ve had no trouble. But I... I think I’m going to get rid of it.” (Jack Benny, 10:09)
The graffiti incident:
- Jack: “When I came out, somebody had written on my car, ‘Lulu loves Butch.’ Gee, I was mad.” (Jack Benny, 10:29)
Mary reads out Jack’s classified ad:
- “…For sale or exchange. Maxwell touring car. All modern features including self-starter and one-man top. Excellent view. Only three blocks from the station.” (Mary Livingston, 11:24)
- Jack is listed 'care of Lonely Hearts Club' (11:49). Jack protests, “I don’t belong to that anymore.”
Kenny’s interest in the car:
- Jack: “If you’re so interested in my car, why don’t you take it off my hands?” (Jack Benny, 12:18)
- Kenny: “What do you want for it, Jack?” Jack: “Would $95 be too much?” Kenny: “Yes.” (12:24–12:33)
- Jack tries to lower the price, but Kenny hesitates.

4. Jack’s Failed Car Sale to Anatole Ginsburg & Slapperman

Slapperman phones in, saying he has a buyer (his brother-in-law Anatole Ginsburg):
- “If he’s a relative of yours, I’d rather not sell him my car.” (Jack Benny, 18:25)
- Slapperman: “Go ahead, it’ll save him rights.”
In-person negotiation devolves into comedic confusion:
- Bargaining over price, Anatole offers $50; Jack wants $95, lowers to $85—Anatole still refuses.
- Exchange full of interjections and insults, e.g., “Don’t be a chimpanzee.” (Slapperman, 20:59)
- Mary’s quip: “Mary, I don’t think you’ve got a Chinaman’s chance with this guy.” (Mary Livingston, 19:33)
The “test drive”:
- Jack takes Slapperman and Anatole for a bumpy ride.
- A memorable exchange: “Oh, Jack, I can only see Schlepperman.” — Mary. “What? Hey, Schlep, where’s Anatol?” — Jack. “I’m sitting on him. He wants to jump out.” — Slapperman. (24:01)
- “The spark plugs are doing the Big Apple.” — Mary (24:14)
- Eventually, Anatole and Slapperman fall out of the car after a bump. Jack: “Well, I better go back and get them.” Response: “Don’t bother.” (Kenny Baker, 24:47) “I wouldn’t buy it anyhow.” — Slapperman. (24:48)

5. Car Trouble at the Gas Station

Phil Harris reappears as the gas station attendant:
- Jack tries to buy 2 gallons—gets 2.5 and refuses to pay the extra 8 cents:
  - “Young man, do you realize that a family in China can live for two weeks on $0.08?” — Jack (26:22)
  - Mary: “So can you.” (26:23)
Misunderstandings with the car’s features:
- Mary, on the gas tank/ashtray confusion: “Gee, is that the gas tank?" Jack: "I've been using it for an ashtray." (25:50)
More jokes about Jack’s cheapness and the car’s faults:
- “I’ll be glad when you get rid of this piece of junk.” — Mary (27:16)
- Jack has issues starting the car and nearly reverses into another vehicle:
  - “Watch out, Jack, you’re in reverse.” — Slapperman (27:34)
  - Jack: “Oh, what’s the matter with me anyway?... If I’ve damaged your car, I’ll pay for it.” (27:44)

6. Kenny Baker’s Musical Interlude & Bathtub Antics

Kenny sings “Moon Over Manakura” (13:26; reprise at 15:52)
Comic follow-up:
- Jack: “Why do you hold [the last note] so long?” (Jack Benny, 16:43)
- Kenny: “I never give up a song without a struggle.” (16:55)
- “I sing in a bathtub every morning—and you know, Jack, I had the most embarrassing thing happen to me once…”
- Jack: “What was it?”
- Kenny: “I reached for a high note and swallowed the soap.” (17:11)
- “I bubbled for a week.” (Kenny Baker, 17:17)

7. “The Private Life of a Bumblebee” Sketch

Jack proposes this as a time filler—a play in three ‘buzzes’ and one sting.
As they prepare, Slapperman calls regarding the car sale, launching that entire subplot (17:24–18:05).

Notable Quotes and Moments with Timestamps

Jack’s self-praise and cooking humility:
- “For years I’ve been known as Prudence Benny of Beverly Hills and my pies… I’m famous for my lemon meringue.” (03:40)
Thanksgiving dinner critique:
- “We had everything from soup to bicarbonate of soda.” — Mary (05:05)
- “The turkey was good, wasn’t it?… I cooked it with a blowtorch. That did it.” — Jack (04:43)
- “I had to jack mine up to butter it.” — Mary, about Jack's dinner rolls (06:28)
Kenny's deadpan honesty:
- “I took two [spoons].” (06:56)
Phil’s bandleader rivalry:
- “I’m mad at the piano player and he hates my voice.” — Phil (09:26)
Jack's indignation at car graffiti:
- “When I came out, somebody had written on my car, lulu loves butcher. Gee, I was mad.” (10:29)
Mary's classified ad punchline:
- “Owner satisfied, but could feel better.” (Mary Livingston, 11:41)
Car ride slapstick:
- “The spark plugs are doing the Big Apple.” — Mary (24:14)
- “I’m sitting on him. He wants to jump out.” — Slapperman, about Anatole (24:01)
Jack’s hallmark thriftiness at the gas station:
- “Young man, do you realize that a family in China can live for two weeks on $0.08?” — Jack (26:22)

Musical Numbers

“Go South, Young Man” – Orchestra opening (00:34)
“You Can’t Stop Me From Dreaming” – Phil Harris & orchestra (07:49)
“Moon Over Manakura” – Sung by Kenny Baker (13:26, 15:52)

Episode’s Peak Comedy & Memorabilia

The blend of witty, rapid-fire insults, Jack’s inability to cook, and the disastrous test drive stand out as golden moments of radio-era comedy.
As always, running gags about Jack’s cheapness and the state of his Maxwell car anchor the show’s humor.
Most memorable exchange:
- “I had five people to dinner and six spoons were missing.” — Jack
- Kenny: “I took two.”
- Jack: “Well, give me one back. Don’t be a pig.” (06:56–06:59)

Conclusion

This Jack Benny Program episode is a classic slice of old-time radio with a Thanksgiving twist. The ensemble’s snappy chemistry, offbeat asides, and relentless ribbing are timelessly funny. For fans of the golden age of radio or newcomers, this is a perfect snapshot of the humor, camaraderie, and slapstick that made the Jack Benny Program a household fixture.

For deeper laughs:

Listen from 02:15 for Jack’s deadpan opening and Thanksgiving banter
The failed car sale and road test run roughly from 18:00 to 27:15
Musical numbers at 07:49 and 13:26, plus comedic song commentary at 16:43

Original tone: Dry, deadpan wit mixed with slapstick and lighthearted insult comedy; ensemble chemistry is strong and effortless.

Podcast Summary: Harold's Old Time Radio

Overview

Key Discussion Points & Highlights

1. Jack Benny’s Thanksgiving Dinner Fiasco

Light banter about teamwork and aging starts things off:
- “Don, can you imagine the both of us on a seesaw? Me way up in the clouds and you down on the good earth. Gee, it makes me dizzy.” (Jack Benny, 02:46)
Kenny and Phil thank Jack for hosting—enthusiastically (and sarcastically):
- Kenny is especially grateful, but, “Gee, everybody else had wine with each course. And you made me drink milk.” (Kenny Baker, 04:18)
- Jack: “Well, Kenny, you’re too young. Besides, milk is good for you. Milk goes with anything.”
- Kenny: “Doesn’t go with my brown suit.” (04:26)
The turkey saga:
- The turkey, a gift from Andy Devine, was legendarily tough. Jack boasts, “I cooked it with a blowtorch. That did it.” (Jack Benny, 04:43)
- Phil: “That’s a fine way to cook a turkey. Why didn’t you put it in the oven?”
- Jack: “I tried to, Phil, but it kept jumping out all the time.”
Mary’s barbed review:
- “We had everything from soup to bicarbonate of soda.” (Mary Livingston, 05:05)
- On the mashed potatoes, “They were so lumpy, Jack had to serve them in the sugar bowl.” (05:14)
More jokes about dinner:
- Mashed potatoes “so nice and tan” because they were cooked under a sun lamp.
- Turkey pieces came with surprises: “I got a neck with a collar button in it.” (Mary Livingston, 05:44)
- Heavy dinner rolls (“I had to jack mine up to butter it.” — Mary Livingston, 06:28)
- Jack’s wounded pride and kleptomaniac guests (“I had five people to dinner and six spoons were missing.” — Jack Benny, 06:42), with Kenny proudly confessing: “I took two.” (Kenny Baker, 06:56)

2. Phil Harris’ Musical Number

Performance: “You Can’t Stop Me From Dreaming.”
Tongue-in-cheek drama:
- Jack calls out Phil: “That was quite a surprise. I didn’t know you were going to slip in a solo there, did you, Kenny?” (Jack Benny, 09:11)
- Phil: “I’m mad at the piano player and he hates my voice.” (09:26)
- Jack: “Well, you certainly fixed him.”

3. Jack’s Infamous Maxwell Car & the Decision to Sell

Ongoing jokes about the car’s reliability and Jack’s frugality:
- Phil asks: “How’s the old tub behaving?”
- Jack: “Oh, it’s all right, Don. I’ve had no trouble. But I... I think I’m going to get rid of it.” (Jack Benny, 10:09)
The graffiti incident:
- Jack: “When I came out, somebody had written on my car, ‘Lulu loves Butch.’ Gee, I was mad.” (Jack Benny, 10:29)
Mary reads out Jack’s classified ad:
- “…For sale or exchange. Maxwell touring car. All modern features including self-starter and one-man top. Excellent view. Only three blocks from the station.” (Mary Livingston, 11:24)
- Jack is listed 'care of Lonely Hearts Club' (11:49). Jack protests, “I don’t belong to that anymore.”
Kenny’s interest in the car:
- Jack: “If you’re so interested in my car, why don’t you take it off my hands?” (Jack Benny, 12:18)
- Kenny: “What do you want for it, Jack?” Jack: “Would $95 be too much?” Kenny: “Yes.” (12:24–12:33)
- Jack tries to lower the price, but Kenny hesitates.

4. Jack’s Failed Car Sale to Anatole Ginsburg & Slapperman

Slapperman phones in, saying he has a buyer (his brother-in-law Anatole Ginsburg):
- “If he’s a relative of yours, I’d rather not sell him my car.” (Jack Benny, 18:25)
- Slapperman: “Go ahead, it’ll save him rights.”
In-person negotiation devolves into comedic confusion:
- Bargaining over price, Anatole offers $50; Jack wants $95, lowers to $85—Anatole still refuses.
- Exchange full of interjections and insults, e.g., “Don’t be a chimpanzee.” (Slapperman, 20:59)
- Mary’s quip: “Mary, I don’t think you’ve got a Chinaman’s chance with this guy.” (Mary Livingston, 19:33)
The “test drive”:
- Jack takes Slapperman and Anatole for a bumpy ride.
- A memorable exchange: “Oh, Jack, I can only see Schlepperman.” — Mary. “What? Hey, Schlep, where’s Anatol?” — Jack. “I’m sitting on him. He wants to jump out.” — Slapperman. (24:01)
- “The spark plugs are doing the Big Apple.” — Mary (24:14)
- Eventually, Anatole and Slapperman fall out of the car after a bump. Jack: “Well, I better go back and get them.” Response: “Don’t bother.” (Kenny Baker, 24:47) “I wouldn’t buy it anyhow.” — Slapperman. (24:48)

5. Car Trouble at the Gas Station

Phil Harris reappears as the gas station attendant:
- Jack tries to buy 2 gallons—gets 2.5 and refuses to pay the extra 8 cents:
  - “Young man, do you realize that a family in China can live for two weeks on $0.08?” — Jack (26:22)
  - Mary: “So can you.” (26:23)
Misunderstandings with the car’s features:
- Mary, on the gas tank/ashtray confusion: “Gee, is that the gas tank?" Jack: "I've been using it for an ashtray." (25:50)
More jokes about Jack’s cheapness and the car’s faults:
- “I’ll be glad when you get rid of this piece of junk.” — Mary (27:16)
- Jack has issues starting the car and nearly reverses into another vehicle:
  - “Watch out, Jack, you’re in reverse.” — Slapperman (27:34)
  - Jack: “Oh, what’s the matter with me anyway?... If I’ve damaged your car, I’ll pay for it.” (27:44)

6. Kenny Baker’s Musical Interlude & Bathtub Antics

Kenny sings “Moon Over Manakura” (13:26; reprise at 15:52)
Comic follow-up:
- Jack: “Why do you hold [the last note] so long?” (Jack Benny, 16:43)
- Kenny: “I never give up a song without a struggle.” (16:55)
- “I sing in a bathtub every morning—and you know, Jack, I had the most embarrassing thing happen to me once…”
- Jack: “What was it?”
- Kenny: “I reached for a high note and swallowed the soap.” (17:11)
- “I bubbled for a week.” (Kenny Baker, 17:17)

7. “The Private Life of a Bumblebee” Sketch

Jack proposes this as a time filler—a play in three ‘buzzes’ and one sting.
As they prepare, Slapperman calls regarding the car sale, launching that entire subplot (17:24–18:05).

Notable Quotes and Moments with Timestamps

Jack’s self-praise and cooking humility:
- “For years I’ve been known as Prudence Benny of Beverly Hills and my pies… I’m famous for my lemon meringue.” (03:40)
Thanksgiving dinner critique:
- “We had everything from soup to bicarbonate of soda.” — Mary (05:05)
- “The turkey was good, wasn’t it?… I cooked it with a blowtorch. That did it.” — Jack (04:43)
- “I had to jack mine up to butter it.” — Mary, about Jack's dinner rolls (06:28)
Kenny's deadpan honesty:
- “I took two [spoons].” (06:56)
Phil’s bandleader rivalry:
- “I’m mad at the piano player and he hates my voice.” — Phil (09:26)
Jack's indignation at car graffiti:
- “When I came out, somebody had written on my car, lulu loves butcher. Gee, I was mad.” (10:29)
Mary's classified ad punchline:
- “Owner satisfied, but could feel better.” (Mary Livingston, 11:41)
Car ride slapstick:
- “The spark plugs are doing the Big Apple.” — Mary (24:14)
- “I’m sitting on him. He wants to jump out.” — Slapperman, about Anatole (24:01)
Jack’s hallmark thriftiness at the gas station:
- “Young man, do you realize that a family in China can live for two weeks on $0.08?” — Jack (26:22)

Musical Numbers

“Go South, Young Man” – Orchestra opening (00:34)
“You Can’t Stop Me From Dreaming” – Phil Harris & orchestra (07:49)
“Moon Over Manakura” – Sung by Kenny Baker (13:26, 15:52)

Episode’s Peak Comedy & Memorabilia

The blend of witty, rapid-fire insults, Jack’s inability to cook, and the disastrous test drive stand out as golden moments of radio-era comedy.
As always, running gags about Jack’s cheapness and the state of his Maxwell car anchor the show’s humor.
Most memorable exchange:
- “I had five people to dinner and six spoons were missing.” — Jack
- Kenny: “I took two.”
- Jack: “Well, give me one back. Don’t be a pig.” (06:56–06:59)

Conclusion

For deeper laughs:

Listen from 02:15 for Jack’s deadpan opening and Thanksgiving banter
The failed car sale and road test run roughly from 18:00 to 27:15
Musical numbers at 07:49 and 13:26, plus comedic song commentary at 16:43

Original tone: Dry, deadpan wit mixed with slapstick and lighthearted insult comedy; ensemble chemistry is strong and effortless.

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Jack Benny Program 37-11-28 (273) Jack Cooked the Turkey

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Summary

Podcast Summary: Harold's Old Time Radio

Overview

Key Discussion Points & Highlights

1. Jack Benny’s Thanksgiving Dinner Fiasco

2. Phil Harris’ Musical Number

3. Jack’s Infamous Maxwell Car & the Decision to Sell

4. Jack’s Failed Car Sale to Anatole Ginsburg & Slapperman

5. Car Trouble at the Gas Station

6. Kenny Baker’s Musical Interlude & Bathtub Antics

7. “The Private Life of a Bumblebee” Sketch

Notable Quotes and Moments with Timestamps

Musical Numbers

Episode’s Peak Comedy & Memorabilia

Conclusion

Summary

Podcast Summary: Harold's Old Time Radio

Overview

Key Discussion Points & Highlights

1. Jack Benny’s Thanksgiving Dinner Fiasco

2. Phil Harris’ Musical Number

3. Jack’s Infamous Maxwell Car & the Decision to Sell

4. Jack’s Failed Car Sale to Anatole Ginsburg & Slapperman

5. Car Trouble at the Gas Station

6. Kenny Baker’s Musical Interlude & Bathtub Antics

7. “The Private Life of a Bumblebee” Sketch

Notable Quotes and Moments with Timestamps

Musical Numbers

Episode’s Peak Comedy & Memorabilia

Conclusion