
Jack Benny Show-From Corona Naval Hospital 1944-11-19
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What's that sound? That's the sound of Downy unstoppable scent beads going into your washing machine and giving your clothes freshness that lasts all day long. There it is again. It's like music to your ears. Or more like music to your nose. That freshness is irresistible. Let's get a Downy Unstoppables bottle shake. And now a sniff solo. Nice. With Downy Unstoppables, you just toss wash. Wow. For all day freshness.
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The Jack Benny Program. Lucky Strike means fine tobacco. So round, so firm, so fully packed, so free and easy on the draw. LS mfp LS mft lsmft? Why, sure. Yes, sir. Of course. Lucky Strike means fine tobacco. So round, so firm, so fully packed, so free and easy on the draw. If you were present at the tobacco markets now open in the south, you could see Lucky Strike consistently select and buy the finer, the lighter, the naturally milder Lucky Strike tobacco. And this finer lighter, naturally milder Lucky Strike tobacco, means real deep down smoking enjoyment for you. Smoke the smoke tobacco expert. Smoke Lucky strike. From the U.S. naval Hospital at Corona, we bring you the Lucky Strike program. Starring Jack Benny. With Mary Livingston, Bill Harris. Rochester, you're truly Don Wilson. And our new singer, Larry Steven. And now, ladies and gentlemen, as you all know, one of America's great naval heroes, Captain James Lawrence, once said, don't give up the ship. So now we bring you a man who wouldn't give up anything. Jack Benning. Yes, sir. Yep. Yep. Thank you. Thank you. Hello again. This is Jack talking. And, Don, that was a very clever introduction. Except for one thing. It just so happens that it wasn't Captain James Lawrence who said, don't give up the ship. It was John Paul Jones. Oh, no, no, no, Jack, you're wrong. It was Captain James Lawrence. No, Don. No, no. Look. Captain Lawrence said, don't shoot until they make eyes at you. It was John Paul Jones who said, don't give up the ship. It was Captain James Lawrence. It was John Paul Jones. And I ought. I'm an old navy man myself. Say, that's right, Jack. You were in the navy during the last war, weren't you? No. Not only was I in the Navy, but wherever there was any fighting going on, Benny was right in the thick of it. Oh, Kevin, I. Right in there every minute. Really, Jack, where were you? At Great la. Ah, what a place. But, Jack, Great Lakes is in Illinois. And that was 4,500 miles away from enemy action. So how could there have been any fighting? How could there have been any fighting? Done. There were 20,000 sailors and only 12 girls. It was almost as bad as being stationed at corona after 6 o'. Clock. Say, Jack. On a rainy night, say, Jack. When you're flat broke, say, Jack. And no matter where you go, you're followed by a smooch patrol. Smooch patrol? What's that? I don't know, but whenever you're having any fun, they break it up. The old. The old meanies. Anyway, let's. Oh, hello, Mary.
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Hello, Jack. Hiya, fellas.
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Say, you got a nice reception there, Mary. Why not?
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These boys know a trim craft when they see one.
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Well, now, wait a minute, Mary. That's pretty egotistical. My goodness, you think you were Betty Grable or somebody.
C
Look, Jack, as long as Betty Grable isn't Hollywood, I'm somebody here.
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You're right at that, Mary. You're right at that. Mary, you really look nice today in that new outfit you're wearing. But that material's kind of thin, isn't it?
C
Well, it's supposed to be. Jack, this is what you call a peekaboo blouse.
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A peekaboo blouse? First one I've ever seen with a venetian blind. Peekaboo.
C
Jack, that's lace.
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Lace?
C
You know, like the kind you've got on your shawl.
B
Oh, yes. Yes, it is. And, Mary, you didn't have to mention my shawl. Here. You know I. I only wear it around the house.
C
I know.
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What are you laughing at?
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Every time you sit in a rocking chair, you look like Whistler's Mother.
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Mary, when you're knitting socks for the boys in the service, you don't care how you look. So there. Say, Jack, you mind if I ask Mary a question? No, no, Don, go ahead. Well, you see, Mary, Jack and I were having a little discussion. Oh, Don, don't be such a hard loser. What's.
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What's the matter? What's it all about?
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Mary, tell Don who it was that said, don't give up the ship.
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Admiral Farragut.
B
Oh, for heaven's sake, Mary. Admiral Farragut said, full speed ahead and oh, fudge to the torp. So there. Admiral Farragut said, old fudge, he had to be careful. There was a smooch patrol behind him. Anyway, Mary, it was John Paul Jones who said, don't give up the ship. No, Jack. John Paul Jones said, we have just begun to fight. Now, let's not argue about it. We're up here at the Corona Naval Hospital. So let's do a good show, because.
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After Mr. Benny call surgery. Mr. Benny calls surgery.
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Hey, Mary, that's me. Mr. Ben. Excuse me a minute. Hello, Mr. Benny. Are you still looking for a singer for your program? No, I'm not. Who is this? Joe Surgery.
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Bye.
C
Jack. Who was that?
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Joe Surgery? A kid I used to go to school with in Waukegan. Now, let's see. Where were we before we.
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Oh, Jack, here comes your new singer, Larry Stevens.
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Oh, yes. Hello, Larry. Hello, Mr. Benny. Well, Larry, Larry, this is your third week on our program. How do you like it? Swell, Mr. Benny. And I'm even going to change my name like you told me to.
C
Wait a minute. Larry Stevens is a nice name.
B
It is, Mary, but it's too short to be impressive. It should be longer, like John Charles Thomas. Mr. Benny's right. That's why I'm taking his advice and changing my name to Larry Stevens. Milton Frank Pibbett.
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Larry Stevens. Milton Frank Tibbett. But that's too long.
B
Well, Mr. Benny said it would be all right if I just used my initials, L.S.M.F.T. yes, sir. But, Larry, L.S.M. f.T. Stands for Lucky Strike. Means fine tobacco. What? Yes, Lucky Strikes means fine tobacco. Gee, and Mr. Benny told me LSMFT stands for Larry Stevens Makes Fine Tunes.
C
Why, Jack Benny, did you tell Larry that.
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Well. Oh, Ms. Livingston, don't be angry at Mr. Benny. He's helped me a lot. He even told me how to breathe when I sing.
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He did?
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Yes. He told me to be free and easy on the draw. That's right. Now, Larry, how about doing a song for the boys? Right now? Okay, mister. Oh, just a minute, kid. Look it. You studied history in school, didn't you? Yes, sir. Now, I want to ask you a question. I just had an argument with Don Wilson and you can settle it once and for all. Tell me, Larry, who was it that said, don't give up the ship? Was it Captain James Lawrence or John Paul Jones? Captain James Lawrence. What? John Paul Jones. There you are, Wilson. That ought to hold you. Go ahead and save it.
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I dreaded every morning until without a warning you arrived Bringing heaven to my.
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Door.
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It'S the dawning that I've waited.
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For.
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What a difference a day made 24 little hours what? The sun and the flowers where they used to be Ray. Today I'm part of beauty My lonely nights are with it since you said you were mine what a difference a day made There's a rainbow before me Rise above and before me Send that moment hopefully that willing K. It's heaven where you find romance on your.
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What.
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A difference a day makes and the Difference is you wonder whether to la one is.
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You.
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Larry.
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Yes, sir, that was What a difference a day made sung by lsm. I mean Larry. Fevers and. And. Very good, Larry. Thank you, Mr. Benny. Say, Larry. Larry, aren't you thrilled being here today and singing for all Lee sailors? I sure am. And say, Mr. Benny, didn't you tell me that you were a hero during the last war? A hero? Oh, did I? Did I mention that to you, kid?
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Mention it? You had him down with your knee in.
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Mary, stop making things up. Yes, Larry, I. I was quite a hero. In fact, these boys would have been mighty proud of me in 1917. You know, I saw. I saw plenty of action.
C
Some action. You joined the Navy, went to bed, fell out of your hammock, and when.
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You came to, the war was over. Well, those hammocks are pretty tough to sleep in. I wonder why they always hung mine where the lifeboat was supposed to be. Oh, say, Mary, I meant to ask you, did you see Larry Adler when you came in?
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Larry Adler? No, why?
B
Well, he promised to come over today and play his harmonica for the boys. He ought to be here pretty soon. Well, Jack, when Adler gets here, you ask him what naval hero said, don't give up the chip, Don. For he. Look, I don't have to ask anybody. It was John Paul Jones. But, Jack. Oh, for heaven's sake, if John Paul Jones said don't give up the ship, then who said, we've just begun to fight the Republicans, that's who.
C
Oh, Jack, you're just trying to get out of it.
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I am not, Mary. Now, I'm know every famous saying in history and who said it. All right, Jack, then tell me who said, give me liberty or give me death? When I went to school, I was good in history. You know that, Mary. I knew everything there was to know about it. All right, Jack, then tell me who said give me liberty or give me death? The smartest kid in school, too. You know, Mary, I knew more about history than any kid in my class. There wasn't a thing. Then, for heaven's sakes, tell me who said give me liberty or give me death? I don't know. He must have said it after I left school. I can drive you nuts, you know. Now, look, let's drop the whole thing, will you, fellas? All right. But it was Patrick Henry who said that, as if I didn't know. And I still say it was John Paul Jones who gain super flings are here to take your laundry to the next level.
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Talking about gain super flings. Super sized laundry packs. These things are huge. Super fresh, super clean. Gain super flings.
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Gain super flings Laundry packs have four times the oxy cleaning power and three times the Febreze. Freshness versus gain original liquids.
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Super fresh, super clean.
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Gain super flings. Gain super flings for next level laundry.
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You know that big bargain detergent jug is 80% water, right? It doesn't clean as well.
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80% water. I thought I was getting a better.
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Deal because it's so big. If you want a better clean, tide pods are only 12% water. The rest is pure, concentrated cleaning ingredients. Oh, let me make an announcement. Attention shoppers, if you want a real.
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Deal, try tide pods.
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Stop paying for watered down detergents. Pay for clean. If it's got to be clean, it's got to be tide pods. Water content based on the leading bargain.
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Liquid detergent said don't give up the ship. He said it in 1812, in the latter part of December.
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Morning or afternoon?
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Never mind. Anyway, we didn't come up to this naval hospital just to argue. Hello, Jackson. Hi, you fellas. Phil. Phil, what happened to those big entrances you usually make? You know, where you come in and you say, okay, fellas, stand up and cheer. The show's gonna start. Cause Harris is here.
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Yahoo.
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How come. How come you didn't make an entrance like that today? Listen, Jackson, I ain't doing that stuff anymore. It's too hammy. Well, I've been telling you that for eight years. What finally convinced you? Well, it just ain't paying off anymore, that's all. The last time I made one of them entrances, I yelled, okay, kids, beat your skin and get ready to laugh. Cause Harris came in a zoot, zoot. And would you believe it, Jackson? When I made that entrance, the people just stared at me like I was a dope. Phil, when did this happen? This morning when I got on the Corona bus. Well, I'll be. Imagine getting on the Corona bus and going into your act. Phil, are you crazy? What are you talking about? Last week I did it on the Riverside bus and I was held over for two rounds. Trip H. Oh, stay. Phil, I want to ask you a question. Oh, John, there you go again. You know I'm right. Why don't you give up? Well, it won't hurt to ask, Phil. Unless you're afraid. I'm not afraid, and I'll ask him. Phil? Yeah? What did John Paul Jones say in 1812, in the latter part of December? Merry Christmas? He did. Don't you know anything about history? Don't you Know any famous sayings? Sure, I know one. What? You're not shocked till they see the reds of your eyes. You're not shocked till they see the reds of your eyes. Who said that? WC Field. Well, there's no use trying to prove anything with you anyway. The man who said, don't give up the ship was John Paul Jones. And I hope this is the last time. Come in. Okay, kid, beat your skin. Get ready to laugh. Cuf Adler came in a Zeus. Well, Larry Adler. Larry. Larry, where did you ever pick up an entrance like that? Always riding on the Corona bus this morning, and I don't know, some. Some jerk. I don't. And he did it just as I thought. I know the rest of the story. Say, Larry, I'm glad you got here because now you can play your harmonica like you did on our show overseas. All right, Jack. And I'll accompany you on my violin. Oh, no, no, no, Jackson. No, no. Send me back to boot camp.
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Make me a medicine, but not.
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Fell. I was a big hit with my violin in the South Pacific, wasn't I, Larry? Well, I will say you were a curiosity to the natives. What do you mean? Well, all I know is a Eubangi came out and gave you the bird. What? And when you get a bird with them lips, they ain't kidding, Pop. All right, so one Eubanki didn't like me. Happened to be a cousin of Fred Allen. Ones, I mean. Anyway, Larry, you play something for the boys, and we'll play something together later, huh? All right, Jack. I'll give them Holiday for Strings. Good. Hit it, boys. Come on. It's. It's. That was Holiday for Strings, played by Larry Adler. And, Larry, you certainly played a mouthful. You know, Larry, that's a fascinating instrument. Well, you're right, Jack. You know, this is an instrument that really gets. What do you mean? Well, I know a fellow who loved the harmonica so much he married a girl with every other tooth missing. Oh, I see now. Well, now that I think of my aunt, I guess my uncle was in love with a bass fiddle. That gag's no good at all. Anyway, Larry, that number you just played, that number you. Larry, that number you just played was terrific.
C
Yes, it was, Larry. I enjoyed it very much.
B
Why, thanks. And say, Mary, I meant to tell you, that's a very pretty outfit you're wearing.
C
Well, thank you, Larry.
B
But isn't that material awfully thin? Yes.
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In fact, when I bought it, my dressmaker said those famous historical words.
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What was that?
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Don't give up the slip.
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Yeah. I nearly missed my cue there, didn't I? I thought Larry was a. Supposed to say, what was that? Pardon me, Larry. I was all set to jump in. Listen, you didn't. Anyway, hey, hey, you're all right. You can be on my show again, bud. You're all right. Anyway, Mary, you didn't have to say, don't give up the slip, you know, you didn't have to start that all over again. Well, I'm glad you did, Mary. Now, Don, go ahead, Ask Larry Adler. Maybe he can settle our argument. Okay. Okay, Larry, who said, don't give up the ship? Was it Captain James Lawrence or John Paul Jones? Captain James Lawrence. Well, that's gratitude after all I did for you.
C
What did you ever do for him?
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I introduced him to that girl with every other tooth missing. Now, listen, Larry. You and Don Wilson don't know anything about naval tradition. You've never been in the navy. Now, I can bring any sailor up from the audience and prove what I'm talking about. About, in fact. Hey, look, there's a sailor that just walked into the auditorium. Hey, buddy. Buddy, come here a minute, will you? Oh, me? Yeah. Will you come up on the stage for a minute? Show you guys. Now, sailor, I'd like to ask you a few questions. We're having a big discussion here over famous naval sayings, and I think you can help us. Do you know anything about naval expressions? Yes, sir. But tell me, what is the most famous saying in the Navy? Ask her if she's got a friend for me. I don't mean that one. The saying I mean is over a hundred years old. Well, this one didn't start yesterday, bub. Well, thanks anyway, sailor, for coming up here. You're welcome. Now, listen, Don. And that goes for you, Mary, Phil and everybody. John Paul Jones was the one who said, don't give up the ship, and I'll prove it once and for all. I'm going to call up my house and have Rochester look it up in the encyclopedia. Give me that phone. Prove my point. Oh, operator. I'll show you, kid. Operator. Operator.
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Number plane.
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For goodness sake, Operator, what took you so long to answer?
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I'm bashful.
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Well, stop blushing and get me my home in Beverly Hills. The number is Crefview 67071.
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Yes, sir.
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Here, Bashful. Anyway, kids, when Rochester looked it up in the encyclopedia, you'll know I'm right, believe me. Hello. Hello, Rochester. Rochester. Rochester. We're having a big argument here, and I want to ask you something. Do you know any famous saying? I know One what? A don't shoot till you faded, Rocket. I'm talking about expressions that were said during the heat of battle. Well, this one wasn't a tappy pool. I don't mean that. Now, Rocket, do you happen to know who said, don't give up the ship? No, sir. And do you know who said, give me liberty or give me death? No, sir. Well, do you know who said, we have just begun? The Pilgrims? Boss, I don't even know who says Rocket is found. Just a minute. Now, Rochester, listen carefully. We're having an argument and I want to prove something about John Paul Jones. So will you please look it up in the book? Yes, sir. Hold on, boss. He's looking it up. Now, kid, we'll get this set up once and for all.
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I'm anxious to find out, too.
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Operator, you keep out of it. And, Don. Don, you'll be sorry you ever started this whole year. I got it, boss. I got it. You have? What does it say? John Paul Jones, Crestview 56859. I don't mean the telephone book. I want you to go in the library and look up John Paul Jones and my encyclopedia. But, boss, I can't do that. I'm over at my girl's house. House? You're over at your girl's house? And how did you happen to answer when I called my home? That long card on your phone is longer than you think it is. Rock. I said, that's ridiculous. Where does your girl live in Pasadena. Pasadena? Hop in the corner of my telephone reach from Beverly Hills to your girl's house. And San. This sounds like Jerry Colona. How did your cord on my telephone reach from Beverly Hills to your girl's house in Pasadena? Boss, did you ever hear that old expression, love will find a way? Yes. Well, it did it again. Idle car. What? It did. Now, you get back home and what? And bring the phone with you. Okay. Goodbye. Goodbye. Well, I guess that'll show you, kid.
C
What did Rochester say?
B
He looked it up in the encyclopedia, and I was right. It was John Paul Jones who said, don't give up the ship. But, Jack, I heard you say something about Pasadena. That's where he said it in the Battle of Pasadena. I don't want to hear any more about it. Pray for Jack will be back in just a minute. But first, here are my good friends Effie Boone and Kenneth Del Mar. Lucky Strike means fine. Yes, Lucky Strike means fine tobacco. Independent tobacco experts present at the auctions can see Lucky Strike consistently by the finer, the lighter, the naturally milder. Lucky Strike Tobacco. And with such men who know tobacco best, auctioneers, buyers and warehousemen, it's lucky two to one. The famous tobacco auctioneers heard on tonight's program are Mr. Fe Boone of Lexington, Kentucky. I'm Mr. L A Speedriggs of Goldsboro North. Car speaking. LS MFT. LS MFT. LS MFT. Remember, Lucky Strike means fine tobacco. So round, so firm, so fully packed, so free and easy on the draw. This is the National Broadcasting Company. It.
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Podcast: Harold's Old Time Radio
Episode Title: Jack Benny Show – From Corona Naval Hospital
Original Airdate: November 19, 1944
Episode Release: November 6, 2025
Host: Harold’s Old Time Radio
This episode is a classic broadcast of The Jack Benny Program, performed live for servicemen at the Corona Naval Hospital during World War II. Starring Jack Benny with his regular cast (Mary Livingstone, Phil Harris, Don Wilson, and Rochester) and featuring guests Larry Stevens (the new singer) and harmonica virtuoso Larry Adler, the show centers around Benny’s trademark banter, historical mixups, and comedic depiction of military life.
The show delivers comedy sketches, musical performances, and playful arguments, reflecting the humor and spirit that made it a beloved staple of American radio’s golden age.
Notable Quote:
“Captain Lawrence said, ‘Don’t shoot until they make eyes at you.’ It was John Paul Jones who said, ‘Don’t give up the ship.’”
– Jack Benny (02:53)
Memorable Moment:
“How could there have been any fighting? Don. There were 20,000 sailors and only 12 girls!”
– Jack Benny (03:23)
Notable Quote:
“Every time you sit in a rocking chair, you look like Whistler’s Mother.”
– Mary Livingstone (05:34)
Notable Quote:
“Gee, and Mr. Benny told me LSMFT stands for Larry Stevens Makes Fine Tunes.”
– Larry Stevens (08:13)
Notable Exchange:
“Phil, I was a big hit with my violin in the South Pacific, wasn’t I, Larry?”
– Jack Benny
“Well, I will say you were a curiosity to the natives.”
– Larry Adler (19:08–19:13)
Notable Quote:
“He looked it up in the encyclopedia, and I was right. It was John Paul Jones who said, ‘Don’t give up the ship.’ … That’s where he said it, in the Battle of Pasadena.”
– Jack Benny (28:30)
Who said “Don’t Give Up the Ship”?
About Jack’s Service:
Audience Sailor’s Most Famous Naval Saying:
Classic Jack-Rochester phone call:
Mary’s Dress Punchline:
True to The Jack Benny Program’s legendary style, the tone is warm, irreverent, and slyly self-deprecating. Friendly ribbing, groan-worthy puns, and wisecracks abound—especially jokes about Jack Benny’s age, stinginess, and naval “heroics.” Banter is rapid and playful, often blurring lines between the cast’s fictional personas and their camaraderie as old friends.
This vintage episode is a delightful experience of classic American radio humor in support of wartime morale. The banter, running gags, and live performances capture the spirit of an era, while the timeless comedy and interplay among the cast ensure a thoroughly entertaining listen.