Jerry of the Circus - Fake Invitation Sent to Boris

Summary

---

Podcast Summary: Jerry of the Circus – Fake Invitation Sent to Boris

Podcast: Harold's Old Time Radio
Host: Harold's Old Time Radio
Episode Date: May 17, 2026

---

Episode Overview

This episode of "Jerry of the Circus," presented by Harold's Old Time Radio, revisits a comedic episode of circus life in the Golden Age of Radio. It primarily centers on a prank being orchestrated against the boastful Boris, a circus horse performer with a penchant for vanity and high demands. Meanwhile, the circus grapples with soggy conditions after a flood, leading to logistical headaches and inter-departmental banter. The highlight is the hatching of an elaborate scheme: sending Boris a fake dinner invitation from a supposed wealthy Russian noblewoman.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Aftermath of the Flood (02:08 – 05:14)

• Circus grounds are flooded after a fireplug incident; teamwork ensues to drain the water.
• Logistical Challenges: Wet conditions threaten the ability to hold the matinee and the Grand Parade. Jerry, Murray, Mark, and others scramble to implement solutions:
  • Mark: "Well, in bad weather we'd have arranged the tents differently, but it's such a swell day and that layout's the most convenient for the audience." (02:42)
• Resource Management: Sawdust and shavings are needed for the grounds but delivery is delayed, causing anxiety.

2. Boris’s Complaints & Escalating Tensions (05:14 – 08:18)

• Boris confronts Mr. Randall and Whitey about alleged neglect of his prized horses:
  • Boris: "You think you can neglect them, and that's not true." (05:42)
  • Boris is incensed that, due to the flooding, his horses won’t receive their preferred oats.
  • Mr. Randall tries to placate Boris, pointing out everyone is inconvenienced: "After all, accidents will happen. Our horses will have to go without their oats today, too. But there’s plenty of hay." (06:20)
• Boris continues to escalate: He threatens to complain directly to Mr. Randall about what he calls “ridiculous neglect and carelessness.”
• Notable Quote: Boris: "For years, the Rusoffs have slaved that they might own the finest horse flesh in the world." (07:10)

3. Backstage Grumbling about Boris (08:18 – 10:31)

• Murray and Slats vent: They bemoan Boris's arrogance and his treatment of Whitey, vowing to bring Boris down a peg.
  • Slats: "He acts as if he runs the place. And vain. Someday I'm gonna take that peacock down a peg." (09:45)
• Lighthearted Banter: Observing Boris’s vanity and appetite:
  • Slats: "Those Russians eat an awful lot. They eat about half a loaf of bread between each course, just as a kind of appetizer." (10:12)
  • Murray: “I should think they’d get fat.” (10:17)

4. The Prank: Plotting the Fake Invitation (10:31 – 14:39)

• The Big Scheme: Slats proposes sending Boris a fake invitation from a “rich widow with a title”—a sham “Countess Arita Rimsikoff”—playing to his ego.
  • Slats: "We'll pretend to be some rich widow with a title…Then after we’ve told him how wonderful he is, we’ll ask him out to dinner." (10:54–11:07)
  • The plan: Invite Boris to a grand costume ball, have him dress outlandishly, and leave him waiting for a fictitious luxury car that never arrives, providing entertainment for the entire circus crew.
• Quote: Murray: “If he falls for this, Slats, well, it’ll be just what he deserves after the way he talks to Whitey.” (11:48)
• Creative Details: The pranksters decide the fake noblewoman should be Russian, making the invitation more believable to Boris.
  • Slats: “That’ll give her a better excuse to want to get acquainted. Countrymen in a foreign land, you know.” (12:08)

---

Memorable Quotes & Moments

• Mark, on circus logistics:
  “It won’t for long. If this sun will stay out, we’ll be able to get things set in time for the matinee.” (02:19)

• Boris, expressing outrage:
  “My horses must have oats!” (06:35)

• Whitey (Mr. Randall), on Boris’s temperament:
  “When those hot headed Russians let off steam, they certainly go to town.” (08:03)

• Murray, about the prank:
  “Let’s make him look silly. What about dressing him up like a kid? It’d sure be a riot if he’d fall for that.” (13:00)

---

Important Segment Timestamps

• Flooding & Circus Recovery: 02:08–05:14
• Boris confronts the circus management: 05:37–08:18
• Planning the prank over lunch: 09:12–14:39
• Devising details of the fake invitation: 11:56–13:00

---

Episode Tone & Style

The episode is lighthearted and playful, highlighting the camaraderie and occasional mischief among circus workers. Boris’s over-the-top vanity and fiery temper are met with patient exasperation or mischievous wit from his peers, culminating in the plotting of a collective practical joke designed to both amuse and humble. The language is simple, lively, and leans heavily into character-driven humor.

---

Summary

This episode delivers a charming slice of circus life, with teamwork overcoming adversity and a spirited plot to prank an egotistical performer. Listeners get a glimpse of backstage banter, logistical challenges, and the affectionate, teasing relationships that keep the circus family together.

---

Transcript

[SpinQuest Advertiser]

You know what? It sucks to be bored. But when I get on my phone and play real casino games on spinquest.com the time flies by. That two hour wait at the DMV seems like 10 minutes. Play your favorite spots. Live blackjack, live craps with a live dealer. New players, $30 coin packs are on sale for 10 bucks. Play spinquest.com and you'll never be bored again.

[Liberty Mutual Advertiser]

Spin Quest is a free to play social casino void where prohibited. Visit spinquest.com for more details.

[Jerry]

Jerry of the circus.

[Mr. Randall]

Now for Jerry of the circus.

[Murray]

Here she comes. Now he. Be quiet, Rags, or I'll put you in our wagon.

[Mark]

They made that in double quick time, didn't they, Jerry?

[Murray]

I'll see. Do you think they can really get this place dry, Murray? Honestly, it looks like a pond, doesn't it?

[Mark]

Well, it won't for long. If this sun will stay out, we'll be able to get things set in time for the matinee.

[Jerry]

Okay, man, drag that holes over there to me.

[Murray]

Gee, I'd sure like to have some tall boots like those firemen are wearing.

[Jerry]

Land seems to slope in that way. If that's drained properly, it'll clear the entire lot. Too bad your menagerie and main tent had to be set up on the lowest part of the grounds, Murray.

[Mark]

Well, in bad weather we'd have arranged the tents differently, but it's such a swell day and that layout's the most convenient for the audience.

[Jerry]

I suppose you were hardly planning to flood the field.

[Mark]

It's the first time this ever happened. Leastways since I've been in the business.

[Murray]

None of our roustabouts that have done a careless thing like that.

[Mark]

I should say not.

[Jerry]

Okay, man. Man the palm.

[Murray]

Jiminy, I wouldn't have missed anything like this for anything.

[Mark]

Lucky you've got a good drainage system here or your street would be flooded.

[Jerry]

Okay. Hey, Jed, better move that hose more to the far side of the locks.

[Murray]

Gee, the water sure draining off fast.

[Jerry]

You bet it is. We've got an efficient fire department in this town.

[Mark]

Listen to him, Frank.

[Jerry]

I have reason to.

[Murray]

Sure. Murray's just jealous, that's all. He's just an onlooker this morning.

[Mark]

Hey, you guys just wait till the chief gets out of here. And if you want to really see some beautiful work, may you just watch my men get this lot in condition.

[Jerry]

Okay, Chief. Nothing more to do. That is if you want to leave the mud here. Good work, boys.

[Mr. Randall]

Turn her off.

[Mark]

That's a mighty slick job.

[Jerry]

We owe you a lot for that. Well, I'm glad to know it's appreciated, Mr. Randall, to hear this Irishman of yours talking. You think the whole thing didn't amount to a roll paper? Don't mind Marie.

[Mr. Randall]

He's got a swell head. You see, he knows our show couldn't get along without him.

[Mark]

Doggone right it couldn't. Well, I can't hang around here. Me and my men got work to do.

[Mr. Randall]

So long.

[Murray]

Want some help, Murray?

[Mr. Randall]

Sure.

[Mark]

Come along. I can always use an extra hand.

[Mr. Randall]

Okay.

[Murray]

Goodbye, chief. Awful glad to have met you.

[Jerry]

Goodbye, son. I may see you later. I'm coming back to catch the show.

[Mr. Randall]

You bet you are. As my guest. And bring your family. Now, you go over and talk rags.

[Murray]

Come on, hurry up. No need to worry about that now. We've got to go to the laundry anyhow. Just wait till Bump sees you.

[Mark]

Well, Jerry, guess we'll head. For the meantime, I've ordered truckloads of sawdust and shavings to be delivered and I want to check on that.

[Murray]

Yeah, I heard someone say they might have some trouble getting delivery on some of that stuff.

[Mark]

If they do, we'll be in a bad spot. You know, this is a clay lot and the ground never dry in time, see?

[Murray]

That's right. Well, I don't believe we could even have the Grand Parade, could we? In all that, Mark?

[Mark]

I'm afraid not. Well, no use crossing bridges until we get to them.

[Jerry]

Hey, Mark. Yeah?

[Mark]

Any of those shavings been delivered yet?

[Jerry]

No. Sam's dead to tell you they can't

[Mr. Randall]

fill that order in time.

[Jerry]

What?

[Murray]

That's fierce.

[Mark]

Hey, I gotta look into this. That order's gotta be delivered.

[Mr. Randall]

Oh, say, Jerry, I forgot. Whitey's having a fit over at the horse top. A lot of extra cleaning up to do. And he's been calling for you.

[Murray]

Honest. Gee whizz, I'm sorry. I never thought about it, Jerry.

[Mark]

I'm up to my neck myself with troubles.

[Boris]

Go on.

[Mark]

See you later.

[Murray]

You bet. Thanks, Mark, for telling me. Come on. Say, I guess you and I are pretty much indescribable. I ought to have thought about Whitey, but. Well, I was so keen about that pumping job, I. Well, I guess I just didn't think. Well, we might as well go in and get it over with. Come on, Whitey. Hey, Whitey, we better wait.

[Boris]

No, it is ridiculous.

[Mr. Randall]

Oh, but, Boris. Boris, I've always done everything I could for your horses.

[Boris]

No, you have not. Because they belong to me and not to Mr. Randall. You think you can neglect them, and that's not true.

[Mr. Randall]

After all, Boris, all I'm supposed to do is see that they have the proper food supply and accommodation. You have your own men who groom them.

[Boris]

So now you try to lay the blame on my men, eh?

[Mr. Randall]

There's no blame. I'm simply telling you that Your contract with Mr. Randall says that all we're supposed to do is to furnish the proper food in each town for your horses.

[Boris]

Yes, that is it. So do you think they get the proper food? Eh?

[Mr. Randall]

Of course. They get exactly what you've ordered for them in every town.

[Boris]

It is not true. Today they do not get the proper rods. I shall go to Mr. Randall with this, and you shall be discharged.

[Mr. Randall]

Now, listen, boys, be reasonable. After all, that fireplug that flooded us out this morning caught enough trouble. Of course it would get the oats all wet. But after all, accidents will happen. Our horses will have to go without their oats today, too. But there's plenty of hay. Hey, hey, hey.

[Jerry]

Bah.

[Boris]

Who cares about hay when my contract calls for oats? My horses must have oats.

[Mr. Randall]

Oh, now, if you'll just keep calm bores, I'll see what can be done about it. After all, you know you've got to be reasonable in an emergency.

[Boris]

Emergency. And while we're on the subject, it seems to me that my horses haven't been bedded down properly lately.

[Mr. Randall]

Your grooms have been given everything they've asked for.

[Boris]

So that's what you say. I hear a very different story.

[Mr. Randall]

Okay, okay. If you feel that way, go on and talk to Mr. Randall.

[Boris]

After all, my horses represent an investment of thousands of dollars. For years, the roost offs have slaved that they might own the finest horse flesh in the world.

[Mr. Randall]

Yes, yes, I know you've got beautiful animals, Boris.

[Boris]

And so you cannot blame me when I see them being neglected and my investment subject to possible destruction.

[Mr. Randall]

Now, Boris, you know your horses are in no danger.

[Boris]

I am not so sure. And Stan, the head groom, says he thinks the boxcar should have heavier pad after all. In transit, I can't afford to have the shins hurt.

[Mr. Randall]

I'm afraid, Boris, you'll just have to take all this up with Mr. Randall.

[Boris]

Yes, you are right. That is just what I will do. I will no longer stand this ridiculous neglect and carelessness. Yes, yes, I will make my complaint to the.

[Mr. Randall]

All right, all right. Goodbye, Boris.

[Boris]

Goodbye.

[Slats]

Oh.

[Mr. Randall]

Oh, hello there, Jerry. Well, I didn't see you. How long you been standing there? Quite a while.

[Murray]

Say, Waddy, I'm sure sorry I didn't get over here Gee, I didn't realize you were in trouble.

[Mr. Randall]

I say, I thought I was in enough hot water until that Boris came complaining around. He certainly can be a nuisance.

[Murray]

But the way he talks to you, Whitey, that's awful.

[Mr. Randall]

Oh, I ought to be used to it by now, I guess. I tell you, when those hot headed Russians let off steam, they certainly go to town.

[Murray]

And after all you do for them and their horses too.

[Mr. Randall]

I know, but Boris has always ruled his own troop like a little czar. And sometimes I guess he forgets he doesn't own the whole circus.

[Murray]

I thought Olga was a boss in that family.

[Mr. Randall]

Well, she tries to be. The only one she'll take orders from is Boris.

[Murray]

Some family. But aren't you afraid Boris will get you into trouble when he sees Mr. Randall?

[Mr. Randall]

Well, I should say not. Randall understands the situation. After all, I've worked for the boss for years. He knows I'm okay.

[Murray]

He oughta.

[Mr. Randall]

Hey, here we are, staying and talking with enough work on our hands to keep us busy till matinee time. Jerry, we've got to get the mud off those horses and any of the trappings that got splattered during that flood.

[Murray]

Okay, Waddy, I'll polish those horses of ours so well even you won't know them.

[Mr. Randall]

That's the ticket, Jerry. Now step on it and we'll be through in time for lunch.

[Slats]

Maybe.

[Murray]

What do you mean maybe?

[Mr. Randall]

I thought that'd be a good way to speed you up a bit.

[Murray]

Hi there, Slat. You the last one eating?

[Mr. Randall]

I'll say.

[Slats]

But how come you got here so late? I thought the flag was down by now.

[Murray]

Not so loud. I sneaked in and Joe promised to bring me a plate of grub.

[Slats]

Oh, what happened?

[Murray]

Well, I tell you, those horses got in an awful mess during that sprinkling we took this morning.

[Slats]

Well, I hear you make a pretty good nursemaid to the horses.

[Murray]

Sure, I like it. As a matter of fact, I like everything that happens around here, accidents and all.

[Slats]

Uh huh.

[Murray]

Except.

[Slats]

Except what?

[Murray]

The way Boris Rusoff talks to Waddy.

[Slats]

Oh, so that's so and so. Shooting off his face again.

[Murray]

Hey, don't you like him either?

[Slats]

I do not. He acts as if he runs the place. And vain. Someday I'm gonna take that peacock down to Peg.

[Jerry]

How?

[Slats]

And I don't know, but I'll think of a way. Here comes your food, Jerry.

[Murray]

Oh gee. Say, thanks, Joe. I'll do something for you sometime.

[Jerry]

Okay, Jerry, I gotta get back to my dishes now.

[Murray]

Goodbye and thanks a million. Gee, I sure like to eat?

[Slats]

You're telling me you and Boris take the prize when it comes to putting away food?

[Murray]

Yeah. Someone said those Russians eat an awful lot.

[Slats]

I say they do. They eat about half a loaf of bread between each course, just as a kind of an appetizer.

[Murray]

I should think they'd get fat.

[Slats]

Well, not with all the exercise those horses give them. I tell you, I don't know whether they like to eat or show off the most.

[Murray]

Can you reach that plate of bread, Slats?

[Boris]

Sure.

[Slats]

Here you are.

[Murray]

Thanks.

[Slats]

I got it.

[Murray]

What, the bread?

[Slats]

No, an idea. And what an idea. Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy.

[Murray]

What is it?

[Slats]

Well, how we can take our friend Boris down a bit and get some fun out of it at the same time.

[Mark]

How?

[Slats]

Well, you may be too young to have noticed our Boris. Boris loves to show off to the ladies.

[Murray]

Jerry, I certainly am not too young. I guess I can see him scraping and bound in front of the pretty women as much as you do.

[Slats]

Okay, now, this is the gag. We'll write him a fan letter.

[Murray]

That'd only make him vainer. He gets plenty now.

[Mr. Randall]

Sure.

[Slats]

That's why he'll probably fall for the trick. We'll pretend to be some rich widow with a title.

[Murray]

A duchess, huh?

[Mr. Randall]

Sure.

[Slats]

May as well be. Won't cost any more. Then after we've told him how wonderful he is, we'll ask him out to dinner.

[Murray]

Then he'll find out.

[Slats]

You just hold on your horses. We'll make it a grand affair. Party, costume ball.

[Murray]

You mean get him all excited? So get a costume and everything.

[Slats]

Sure. Then we'll tell him to wait outside for a town car and a chauffeur to call for him.

[Murray]

And nothing will happen and the whole circus will get a good laugh.

[Slats]

Well, what do you think of it?

[Murray]

Well, I think it'd serve him right if you think you'll fall for it.

[Slats]

Well, that's up to us to make it sound real enough. Got a pencil?

[Murray]

Sure.

[Slats]

Okay. And here's a piece of paper. We'll have to work out a good letter.

[Murray]

Gee, this is great. I tell you, if he falls for this Slats, well, it'll be just what he deserves after the way he talks to Whitey.

[Slats]

Let me see now. My dream writer.

[Murray]

Say, you're not gonna start it off like that, are you?

[Mr. Randall]

Sure.

[Slats]

Then we'll say, the Countess Arita Rimsikoff.

[Murray]

You gonna make her Russian too?

[Boris]

Sure.

[Slats]

That'll give her a better excuse to want to get acquainted. Countrymen in a foreign land, you know. Say, you're smart yeah, my mother always thought so. Now, let's see. Where do we go from here?

[Murray]

I got it. A noble woman from your own country.

[Slats]

Good. A noble woman from your own country wishes to thank you in person for the brilliant and skillful riding which takes her back to the years when she was a teacher. Court and the Cossacks of her own country gave special performances for the czar. Tonight I am giving a grand costume ball at my estate. If you would honor me by coming in costume. How do we make him dress, Jerry?

[Murray]

Gee, I don't know. Let's make him look silly. What about dressing him up like a kid? It'd sure be a riot if he'd fall for that.

[SpinQuest Advertiser]

You know what? It sucks to be bored. But when I get on my phone and play real casino games on spinquest.com the time flies by. That two hour wait at the DMV seems like 10 minutes. Play your favorite slots, live blackjack, live preps with a live dealer. New players. 30 coin packs are on sale for 10 bucks. Play spinquest.com and you'll never be bored again.

[Liberty Mutual Advertiser]

Spin Quest is a free to play social casino void where prohibited. Visit spinquest.com for more details. And Doug, there's nowhere I wouldn't go to help someone customize and save on car insurance with Liberty Mutual. Even if it means sitting front row at a comedy show.

[Mr. Randall]

Hey, everyone. Check out this guy and his bird. What is this, your first date?

[Liberty Mutual Advertiser]

Oh, no. We help people customize and save on car insurance with Liberty Mutual together. We're married. Me to a human, him to a bird.

[Mr. Randall]

Yeah, the bird looks out of your league.

[Liberty Mutual Advertiser]

Anyways, get a [e-mail] or with your local agent.

[Mr. Randall]

Liberty.

[Slats]

Liberty. Liberty.

[Mr. Randall]

Liberty.