Kate Smith Hour 43-02-12 Guest Henny Youngman, Leonard Sues plays Steam on the Beam

Summary

Harold's Old Time Radio
Episode Summary: Kate Smith Hour 43-02-12
Guest: Henny Youngman
Special Performance: Leonard Sues plays "Steam on the Beam"
Release Date: January 14, 2025

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Introduction

In this nostalgic episode of Harold's Old Time Radio, listeners are transported back to the Golden Age of Radio with the Kate Smith Hour. Hosted by Ted Collins and featuring the beloved singer Kate Smith, this episode is a delightful blend of music, humor, and camaraderie, perfectly capturing the spirit of a bygone era when families gathered around the radio to enjoy entertaining programs.

Program Opening

The episode begins with Ted Collins welcoming the audience to the Kate Smith Hour, broadcasted from Atlanta, Atlantic City, specifically catering to the servicemen of the Army Air Force's Technical Training Command. Collins emphasizes the program's reach, intended to provide comfort and entertainment to troops both domestically and overseas.

Quote:
"Good evening. This is Ted Collins welcoming you to the Kate Smith Hour, brought to you tonight from Atlanta, Atlantic City..." [00:57]

Musical Interlude: "Fine and Dandy"

Kate Smith opens the show with a heartfelt rendition of "Fine and Dandy," setting a warm and inviting tone. Her performance is interspersed with playful interactions between her and a soldier, adding a touch of humor to the musical piece.

Quote:
"Hi, you fellas. Well, let's take off, Ted." [01:33]
"When you're gone what can I do? I get lonesome I get so blue..." [02:13]

Comedy Skit: Medical Corps Officer and Ted Collins

A comedic exchange unfolds between Ted Collins and a Medical Corps Officer, highlighting the typical radio humor of the era. The skit revolves around a series of "magical" pills that provide relief but come with amusing side effects, such as hair falling out and teeth turning black.

Quote:
Medical Corps Officer: "Well, it's a good thing they told me. I have just the thing here for you. Here, you just take these three pills." [03:53]
Ted Collins: "My hair will fall out?" [04:29]

Musical Performance: "I Got a Gal in Kalamazoo"

Kate Smith transitions into the lively and upbeat song "I Got a Gal in Kalamazoo," encouraging listeners to tap their feet and sing along. The performance exudes joy and showcases Smith's exceptional vocal talent.

Quote:
"K A L A M A Z O O what a gal in Kalamazoo..." [05:27]

Stand-Up Comedy: Penny Young

Penny Young takes the stage, delivering a series of humorous anecdotes and jokes that resonate with the servicemen. Her routine covers a range of topics from military life to personal stories, providing much-needed laughter and levity.

Quote:
"I want to tell you boys, I have some good news for you. The war is as good as over..." [07:51]
"You know, Missy Jackson..." [07:12]

Introduction of Leonard Sues and "Steam on the Beam"

The episode features a special performance by Leonard Sues, a talented young trumpet player. Sues captivates the audience with his rendition of "Steam on the Beam," adding a musical diversity to the program.

Quote:
Ted Collins: "Now we'd like you to meet once more one of the finest young trumpet players in the country, Leonard Seuss, playing the number he made famous, Steam on the Beat." [19:00]

Colonel Robert P. Glassburn's Address

Colonel Robert P. Glassburn, commander of the Atlantic City Basic Training Center Technical Training Command, addresses the audience, expressing gratitude for Kate Smith's contributions to American entertainment and the morale of the troops. He presents Smith with an inscribed trophy, symbolizing appreciation and encouragement.

Quote:
Colonel Glassburn: "You, Ms. Smith, represent a wholesome endeavor in the world of American entertainment..." [22:48]

Dedication: "The Song of the Bombardier"

Kate Smith and the chorus dedicate a spirited song titled "The Song of the Bombardier" to honor the men of the Army Air Forces. The song celebrates their dedication and readiness, serving as a rousing tribute to the servicemen's efforts.

Quote:
"Roar away with the bombardier Rack up the eggs Line up the golden goose..." [24:48]

Closing Remarks

Ted Collins wraps up the program by acknowledging the contributions of all participants and reinforcing the camaraderie between the entertainers and the troops. The episode concludes with a reminder of the show's purpose: to provide entertainment and support to those serving in the military.

Quote:
Ted Collins: "You have just heard a delayed broadcast scheduled expressly at this time for the armed forces of the United nations..." [29:40]

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Notable Highlights

• Humorous Interactions: The skits involving Ted Collins and the Medical Corps Officer, as well as Penny Young's stand-up routine, provide a hearty dose of humor, characteristic of old-time radio shows.

• Heartfelt Music: Kate Smith's performances are both uplifting and soothing, offering moments of reflection and joy to listeners.

• Tributes to Servicemen: The show's dedication to the servicemen, through songs and addresses by military officials, underscores the strong connection between entertainment and military morale during the era.

• Special Guests: Leonard Sues' trumpet performance adds a unique musical dimension, while Colonel Glassburn's visit bridges the gap between the military and the entertainment industry.

Conclusion

This episode of the Kate Smith Hour is a quintessential representation of mid-20th-century radio programming. Through a harmonious blend of music, comedy, and heartfelt tributes, the show not only entertains but also fosters a sense of unity and support among servicemen. Harold's Old Time Radio expertly curates this episode, ensuring that the charm and essence of the Golden Age of Radio are preserved for contemporary audiences to enjoy.

Transcript

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[Announcer]

From the United States for the Armed Forces of the United nations, the Special Service Division of the War Department presents a delayed broadcast of one of America's most popular radio programs, the Kate Smith Show.

[Ted Collins]

Good evening. This is Ted Collins welcoming you to the Kate Smith Hour, brought to you tonight from Atlanta, Atlantic City, where we are broadcasting for the pleasure of tens of thousands of boys of the Army Air Force's Technical Training Command, which is under the command of Major General Walter R. Weaver. This program is also being released for rebroadcast to reach our troops and their comrades in arms overseas. Now, your hostess, Kate Smith.

[Kate Smith]

Hello. Hello, everybody. And hi, you fellas. Well, let's take off, Ted.

[Medical Corps Officer]

Off it is, Kate.

[Ted Collins]

And fine and dandy, right?

[Kate Smith]

Gee, it's all fine and dandy Sugar candy When I've got you Then I always see the sunny side Even trouble has its funny side when you're gone I get lonesome I get no clue when you're handy it's fine and dandy.

[Soldier]

But when you're gone what can I do?

[Kate Smith]

When you're gone what can I do? I get lonesome I get so blue get so lonesome that I don't know what to do.

[Soldier]

Gee, it's all fine and dandy Sugar candy When I'm with you I only see the sun it's high Even trouble has its funny tight Even trouble has its funny Tight.

[Kate Smith]

And.

[Soldier]

Blandy Sugar candy When I'm with you Always see the rise of solly tide Even though my trouble has its funniest time when you're go Candy I get so I get so blue when you're handy it's fine and dandy Fine and dandy when you're handy Sugar candy Fine and dandy but when you're gone what can I do?

[Penny Young]

Pardon me, sir.

[Ted Collins]

Yes, sir.

[Medical Corps Officer]

Is your name Collins?

[Ted Collins]

Yes, sir.

[Medical Corps Officer]

Mr. Collins, I'm attached to the Medical Corps here, and the commanding officer tells me you haven't been feeling well today.

[Ted Collins]

Well, I don't feel too well. I have sort of shooting Pains in my back. It's really terrible.

[Medical Corps Officer]

Oh, shooting pains in the back?

[Ted Collins]

Yes, sir.

[Medical Corps Officer]

Well, it's a good thing they told me. I have just the thing here for you. Here, you just take these three pills.

[Ted Collins]

Well, will they help me?

[Medical Corps Officer]

Well, Help you? They're just like magic.

[Ted Collins]

Well, how do I take them?

[Medical Corps Officer]

Well, you take one right now and boom, those pains in the back disappear.

[Ted Collins]

Oh, that's wonderful.

[Medical Corps Officer]

Yes. Oh, I forgot to mention one little thing. Then your. Your hair will fall out.

[Ted Collins]

My hair will fall out?

[Penny Young]

Yes.

[Ted Collins]

That's very nice. I think.

[Medical Corps Officer]

Don't, no, don't get excited now. That's when you take the second pill.

[Ted Collins]

Oh, I see. Then what happens?

[Medical Corps Officer]

Then your hair comes right back in again.

[Ted Collins]

Well, now, that's much better.

[Medical Corps Officer]

You said it. The only thing is, then your teeth turn black.

[Ted Collins]

Well, now, look, that's worse than the hair for you.

[Penny Young]

Don't get excited.

[Medical Corps Officer]

That's perfectly all right. You see, that's when you take the third pill.

[Ted Collins]

Oh, now I understand. Then my teeth turn white again. Well, then I'm all set.

[Penny Young]

Right.

[Medical Corps Officer]

Only there are those darn pains in the back again.

[Ted Collins]

Here, come to a little hot tune for you now. A record version of I Got a Gal in Halama.

[Kate Smith]

K A L A M A Z O O what a gal in Kalamazoo don't want to boast But I know she's a toast of Kalamazoo Zoo, zoo, zoo, zoo, zoo Years have gone by My, my, how she grew say, I liked her looks When I carried her book in Kalamazoo Zoo, zoo, zoo I'm gonna send a wire Hopping on the flyer I'm leaving today Am I dreaming? I can hear screaming. Hiya, Mr. Jackson everything's okay. A L A M A Z O oh, what a gal A real pepperoo say, I'll make my bid for that freckle faced kid I'm hurrying to I'm going to Michigan to see that sweetest gal in Kalama I'm gonna send a wire Hopping on a flyer I'm leaving today Am I dreaming? I can hear screaming.

[Soldier]

Hey, Missy Jackson.

[Kate Smith]

Oh, K A L A M H See. Oh, what a G. A real pepperoo hey, I'll make my bid for that freckle faced kid I'm hurrying too I'm.

[Soldier]

Going to Michigan to see that sweetest.

[Kate Smith]

Gallon Kalamazoo Zoo, zoo, zoo, zoo, zoo, zoo, zoo, Zoo Caliber.

[Ted Collins]

Now, ladies and gentlemen, Penny Young.

[Penny Young]

Thank you, folksies. Thank you. And before I do anything further, I want to say that I'm giving up my violin for the duration Since a successful re. Since the successful return of Burlesque. No more G strings. I want to tell you it's a thrill be. I want to tell you it's a thrill being here. And I got such a swell reception. When I arrived, the CEO gave me a motorcycle escort all the way to my hotel. But I'm telling you, you know, you get out of breath running between two motorcycles. Now, Mr. Collins, before he came down here, I said, get me hotel reservations. And he did. He got me a beautiful room with an adjoining towel. I paid my rent in advance. I put the window back in my room. Today I have a window overlooking a wastebasket. You can imagine how big my room is. When I close the door, the doorknob gets in bed with me. Wanted to change my mind. I had to walk out in the hall to do it. I need it. I had a headache. The guy next door took the aspirin. I have a Murphy bed in my room. The whole trouble is, when I opened a bed, Murphy was still in it. But I want to tell you boys, I have some good news for you. The war is as good as over. Within the next three weeks, they're going to draft my brother. He's never held a job more than three weeks. My brother. I want to tell you what a guy my brother is There is the most superstitious man I've ever met. He won't work any week that has a Friday. He's in the funniest business. He finds things before people lose them. He's been up the river so many times, they call him Showboat. But I want to tell you, the draft has really got him worried. He came to me the other day and he said, henny is stealing an essential industry. One thing about my brother I'll never forget. He used to walk into a bar room, order a glass of beer for a dime and eat all the free lunch. Well, they caught on to him after a while and they said, the next time this guy comes in, take off the free lunch and put on dog biscuits. We'll fix them. So he ate the dog biscuits. He was missing a week. He came back, he saw the free lunch again. He said, what's the matter? No more cookies. But I want to tell you so much of my brother, boys. But one thing. You know, folks, I found the boys down here very, very polite, you know. Only this afternoon, one soldier told me whenever he sees an old lady crossing the street, he always helps our daughter. I saw two pilots going every place together. It's nice to see two buddies And I walked up to these two fellows. I said, you two boys are inseparable, aren't you? And one of them said, and how his girl knitted his beard and my sweater. I met a soldier I knew down here and I said to him, hey, kid, you've been here quite a while. When do you get your wings? He said, this afternoon I'm on KP duty cutting up chickens. All of a sudden an MP came toward me, walking like it was a pogo stick. He went up about 5ft with every step he took. I said to him, what happened to you? He said, oh, it's that cook. He's so air minded he keeps putting helium in the meatballs. It's funny. I watched one soldier trying to pick up a girl on the boardwalk. She said, mama told me never to go out with the Air Corps. He said, okay then, so long. And she said, hey, wait a minute. Whose side are you on, mine or Mama's? You know, I walked along the beach and I heard a drill instructor talking to a girl. He said, you know I'm going to kiss you. And she said, if you do, I'll scream. He said, then I better not kiss you. She said, you jerk. Who's going to hear me way out here? You know, that reminds me of the time I spent the summer down here in Atlantic City and you ought to see me in a bathing suit. Plenty of laughs. Plenty of laughs, fellas. I put on my bathing suit and I laid down in the sand. There I was, completely covered with olive oil and vinegar. If I'd have stuck a piece of lettuce in my mouth, that would have looked like a French salad. Free French. Just then I heard a mother talking to her little boy. She said, no, don't you go in that deep water. It's too dangerous. He said, yes, but why is it Daddy can go in the deep water? She said, daddy's insured. There was a bald headed man in the water and he was very happy. He was yelling, woo, woo, woo. This is wonderful. I said, what's so wonderful about it? He said, this is the first time I've had a wave on my head in 20 years. Now I. Now I'd like to tell you fellas about my girl. There is a dream, you know. She entered a beauty contest down here. And I said to one of the judges, that's my girl over there. What kind of a chance would you say she had? He looked at her and he said, my boy, with the proper care, she might live for years.

[Kate Smith]

As long as you're not in in love with anyone else why don't you fall in love with me? You're driving me crazy, baby trying to get Will you tell me no or will you tell me yes? You got to go overboard for someone someday Believe it or not it's bound to be as long as you're not in love with anyone else why don't you fall in love with me? As long as you're not in love with anyone else why don't you fall in love with me? You're driving me crazy, baby trying to guess Will you tell me no or will the answer be yes? You gotta go overboard for someone someday Believe it or not it's bound to be as long as you're not in love with anyone else why don't you fall in love with me?

[Soldier]

Og?

[Kate Smith]

Why don't you fall in love with me?

[Ted Collins]

Kate introduces a brand new song tonight. It's the first time you've ever heard it. I think it's something that the boys in service have been trying thousands of ways to say.

[Kate Smith]

Wait for me, Mary Till the world will smile again Till it smiles in style again and the dreams worthwhile again Wait for me, Mary.

[Soldier]

By the moonlit.

[Kate Smith]

Garden gate where my heart and I.

[Soldier]

Would wait for you.

[Kate Smith]

There are so many things I want to tell you Little words that I never told before and I hope that it won't be hard to tell you all the dreams.

[Soldier]

I have in.

[Kate Smith]

Wait for me, Mary Till the world will sing again Till I bring my love again to you There are so many things I want to tell you Little words that I never told before and I hope that it won't be hard to tell you.

[Soldier]

All those dreams I have in store so wait for me, Mary Till the.

[Kate Smith]

World will sing again Till I bring my love again to you.

[Ted Collins]

Now we'd like you to meet once more one of the finest young trumpet players in the country, Leonard Seuss, playing the number he made famous, Steam on the Beat. And now, before Kate sings her next song, I want the radio listeners of the nation to meet Colonel Robert. Robert P. Glassburn, who is in command of the Atlantic City Basic Training Center Technical Training Command. Ladies and gentlemen, Colonel Glassburn.

[Colonel Robert P. Glassburn]

Thank you, fellow. Thank you, Mr. Collins. And welcome to you, Miss Smith. It is a pleasure to have you and your company with us for this broadcast program which we have greatly enjoyed. You, Ms. Smith, represent a wholesome endeavor in the world of American entertainment and have made a fine art of the profession of song as demonstrated by your warm reception in the households of our country on Such nights as this.

[Announcer]

This.

[Colonel Robert P. Glassburn]

As commanding officer of this basic training center of the Army Air Forces technical Training Command, I'm privileged to present you with this inscribed trophy bearing a winged emblem from the soldiers of Atlantic City in remembrance of your visit with us. I hope that it will be possible for you to come again someday.

[Kate Smith]

Thank you. Thank you very much. Colonel Glassburn. Nothing I've ever done has given me greater pleasure than these visits we've been paying. To the young men who are working and training in the services of Uncle Sam. My sincere thanks to you, colonel. And to Captain Alfredstein, or Stein, rather, and all your men for inviting us here. Thank you very, very much. Much.

[Ted Collins]

And now, Kate Smith and the chorus dedicate this song to all men of the army air forces, wherever they may be. The song of the bombardier.

[Kate Smith]

Roar away with the pompa deer Rack up the eggs Line up the golden goose Pour away Whisk the pompom deers we're heading for a spot to turn them loose High or low in rain or snow Neath the tropical sun off we go look out below We've got a job to be done Souvenir from the US Bombardier we're ready to make a flight the gunner is at his time the bomber is fueled and set to go the weather is clear tonight A typical bomber's moon the motors are all in tune the pilot is in the cockpit so we've gotta get going.

[Soldier]

Soon we're gonna make them yell we're gonna give them help oh, roar away with the bombardier Rack up the eggs Line up the golden boot Score away with the bombardiers to we're heading for a spot to Turn of the moon Night of day rain a sword by a spare up we go Way up and on ear on the U. S.

[Ted Collins]

US that.

[Announcer]

You have just heard a delayed broadcast scheduled expressly at this time for the armed forces of the United nations by the special service division of the war department of the United States of America. This program has been a part of our English language short wave service.