
Let's Listen To Spencer 1944-10-15 Bertha And Herman
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Nicole Byer
We interrupt this program to bring you an important Wayfair message. Wayfair's got style tips for every home. This is Nicole Byer helping you make those rooms. Flyer Today's style TIP when it comes to making a statement, treat bold patterns like neutrals. Go wild like an untamed animal. Print area rug under a rustic farmhouse table. From wayfair.com Ooh, beers. This has been your Wayfair style tip to keep those interiors superior.
Spencer
Wayfair Every style Every home Oxidol and Ivory Soap presents Let's listen to Spencer. Spencer's the friendly chap who happens to be here, there and everywhere. He's a man who sees what you see, thinks what you think, and laughs when you laugh. Oxidol, the soap that gets close. White without bleaching. And Ivory soap, 99 and 44, 100% pure. It floats. Invite you to listen to Spencer.
Narrator
People are always telling you that marriage is a wonderful thing. But as you look around, you see some strange combinations. For example, there's the woman who feels that she could have done better if she'd have married the other fellow and never fails to remind her husband about it. There's a woman who figures a little bridge now and then is all right. Now and then it's all right. And then there's always the woman who picks out her husband's clothes.
Spencer
Spencer will be back in just a moment. But first, from Ox at All's White Without Bleaching book comes a story about a long white tablecloth. Actually, it was such a long tablecloth that the woman who owned it gave half of it to each of her two daughters when they got married. Well, later, when one daughter visited the home of her sister, she wanted to know how on earth the sister kept her half of the tablecloth so white, even asked her if she bleached it. Well, the sister said, no, indeed, and told how oxidol washes white without bleaching. Nowadays, both sisters are depending on oxidol to get their washings white without bleaching. Oxidol can wash your clothes that way, too, because oxidol's hustle Bubble suds are so active, so lively, they lift dirt out. So why don't you get that famous orange and blue bullseye package of oxidol? Then every wash day is enjoy a wash that's white without bleaching. And now let's listen to Spencer.
Narrator
Your name is Bertha. Most of the ladies in your club think you're a very nice person. And you are a very nice person. But you have Your weaknesses. And the weakest weakness in your life is your husband, Herman. Now, you and Herman are happily married. Except for one little thing. You won't let Herman live his own life. When Herman wanted to plant the victory garden on the right side of the yard, you insisted on the left. So Herman did it your way. Of course, the fireman didn't punch you in the nose when Herman dug up the water mains. Now, strangely enough, Herman doesn't mind these things.
Herman
No, that's all right, Bertha. It was fun. I'll just chalk it up to experience.
Narrator
He chalks it up to experience. But you. You figure it a little differently.
Bertha
Remember, Herman, the most successful men in history have had a woman behind them.
Narrator
Now, Bertha, Bertha, Herman doesn't mind your getting behind him. If you'd only stop pushing. In fact, he likes being married to you. But for one thing.
Herman
I sure wish I could pick out my own clothes. This blue pinchback is getting a little shiny.
Bertha
Herman, we've gone through that before. That pinch back is lovely. Besides blue, your color. And you don't know a thing about style.
Herman
Well, gosh, I never get a chance to learn. You always pick off my clothes.
Bertha
Herman, you know that I know that I know best.
Herman
That's the trouble with our marriage. When it comes to my clothes. You think that. You know that I know that That's a trouble with our marriage. You think?
Bertha
Herman, that's not nice.
Herman
Guys, look at yourself in this shirt. Boy, if this ain't shiny.
Bertha
Yes, Herman. What?
Herman
I'll have to wear it some more.
Bertha
Well, I have to admit it is pretty shiny.
Herman
Then I can get a new one Saturday, maybe.
Bertha
You know very well I won't be in town Saturday. We'll get it today. Have you forgotten that I'm going to Aunt Mary's place in the country this afternoon? And you're going to join me next week.
Herman
When is the train leave?
Bertha
This afternoon at 4:30.
Herman
Gee, Bertha, it's not gonna be the same here without you. Even though it's only a week.
Narrator
That's right, Bertha. That's right. It's not gonna be the same without you. Maybe Herman can get out with the boys. Nothing serious, mind you. Little bowling, maybe little poker, little milkshakes. Never more than two. Now, about that suit. You can be sure, Bertha, that Herman's going to put up that old argument.
Herman
Bertha, how about that suit?
Bertha
Yes, Herman.
Herman
Brown this time.
Bertha
Now, don't start that all over again. It'll be blue.
Herman
But gee, I've had six blue ones in a row.
Narrator
Come, Herman.
Bertha
We're Buying you a blue suit.
Herman
Very well, Bertha, if you say so. But I'm reluctant. Come on, let's go. You first.
Bertha
No, Herman, you first.
Narrator
That right, Herman? All successful men have a woman behind them. Well, Bertha, you've done it again. Why don't you give them credit for having at least half a mind? Any man can pick out a suit if he's given a chance. You don't even give Herman a choice of colors. Someday this is going to kick back on you even now. The little guy must be planning something.
Herman
Hey, why can't I get a brown suit instead of a blue one? Maybe I could get a sort of a bluish brown. No, no. A brownish blue would be better than that.
Narrator
A brownish blue. You keep thinking like that, Herman, and you won't even be invited to a funeral.
Herman
British Nellis. If I get to the salesman first, I can tell him I want a brown suit.
Narrator
Well, Bertha, even the smallest general has some plan of attack. And it's very likely that when you arrive at the department store and meet the salesman in men's furnishings, Herman will probably say, well, well, well, Herman Cooch.
Salesman
A little blue suit today.
Herman
No, no, not a blue one. Now listen, here's what I want you to do.
Bertha
Herman, what are you whispering to the salesman about?
Herman
I was just asking him.
Bertha
You know very well. It's right over there by the stairway. Now run and get a drink if you're thirsty.
Salesman
What would you like to see, Mrs. Coot?
Herman
A little blue suit, if you don't mind. I'd like to see something in Drown Herman. I don't care. I want a brown suit.
Salesman
Having a little trouble with Herman, Mrs. Coutts?
Bertha
Yes, we'd like to see a little something in blue, if you don't mind.
Salesman
Certainly. Come, Herman.
Narrator
Now how would you feel if a salesman said, come, Bertha. Now he's being marched around like a little kid. And when you come right down to it, what's wrong with a brown suit? Herman's not going to graduate. It seems like a safe bet to buy a brown suit. And Herman could be so happy if he could only buy his own clothes. But no, no, that won't work out. Not with you around, Bertha. Because.
Salesman
Now what'll it be? Single or double breasted?
Herman
I think I'd like a double.
Bertha
Single breasted, if you please.
Salesman
I agree with you, Mrs. Coutts. Herman doesn't seem to be the double breasted type. Now what you thinking on lapels, Mrs. Cooch? Notched or pieced, I like.
Bertha
We'll have the notched lapels oh, notched.
Salesman
I. I suppose you want a plain suit.
Bertha
Very plain.
Herman
Designing it all fine?
Spencer
Not.
Salesman
Let's just slip this 36 on for size. Here we are.
Bertha
How does it feel, Herman?
Herman
I don't know. It's awfully roomy.
Salesman
The vest seems a little large. I'd better pull it down there. What's the matter?
Herman
Tickled?
Bertha
I think that suit will do nicely. Just call the tailor and mark the alterations.
Salesman
I'm sorry. I'll have to take Herman's measurements myself. Our tailor's off today. Ms. Cooch, would you jot down these measurements, as I call them?
Bertha
Certainly. Turn around, Herman, and let the salesman measure you.
Herman
Okay.
Salesman
Now let's see. We'll measure the little shoulders first. Mm, 15 inches. Little narrow.
Herman
Yeah, I lost a lot of weight digging up water mains in my backyard.
Salesman
Now we'll measure the little arms. Right arm 20, 26 and a quarter inches. Left arm, 32 and a half inches.
Herman
32 and a half inches.
Bertha
That's not smart, Herman. He's double jointed.
Narrator
He thinks he's funny.
Salesman
Little prank with a little arms, eh, Herman? Well, now, let's measle his little chest. Take a deep breath. Us, Herman?
Bertha
Herman, the man means breathe, remember?
Herman
Okay, like this.
Salesman
Are you Inhaling or exhaling?
Herman
Inhaling.
Salesman
31 inches. Now exhale. 31 inches.
Herman
Nurse, I'm not much of a breather.
Salesman
Now, let's see. We'll measure the little hips. Put it around here. Mm. And that feeds 44. What sort of work do you do, Herman?
Herman
I'm a bookkeeper.
Narrator
I see.
Spencer
Now, Web.
Salesman
Now we'll get the little legs. Put one end down here and the other.
Nicole Byer
29.
Salesman
29 on the pants length. Now for the little cubs. Will these be bell bottoms too, Mrs. Cooch?
Narrator
Oh, now, Bertha, you've got Herman in a blue suit, no pattern, single breasted with notched lapels. And now you're going to cap it off with bell bottom trousers. After all, he's got to wear it. He's the one who's going to look funny. It'd be a nice idea if you'd ask Herman what he thinks.
Herman
Oh, for crying out loud, I have to wear this. You'd at least think somebody would ask me.
Bertha
That's no attitude to take, Herman. It's your suit and you're picking it up tomorrow. It's almost 4:30. Let's go.
Herman
Yes, Sam. Yes, Sam. It is almost 4:30, isn't it?
Narrator
My, such enthusiasm for a man who's lost his enthusiasm. Now what do you suppose he could Be thinking, huh? Bertha, even now as you stand on the observation platform. He's all smiled, forgotten all about it.
Herman
Well, there, I hope you have a nice time. Give my love to Aunt Mary and Uncle Jack, and I'll see you next week.
Bertha
All right. Now, for goodness sake, take care of yourself. And don't forget to put out the garbage.
Herman
Yes, Dan, the garbage. Bertha.
Bertha
Yes?
Herman
You're going to give me the money, aren't you?
Bertha
Oh, I almost forgot. Here it is. There's $42.50 for the rent and two and a half for yourself for the week.
Herman
Yes, dear. $45. Bye, Bertha.
Narrator
Well, Herman, he's gone. You got $45. You want a brown suit. What are you waiting for?
Herman
Well, she's gone. I got $45. What am I wa.
Spencer
Yes, sir, what can I do for you?
Herman
You can show me a $45 brown suit.
Salesman
Very well. Come this way.
Spencer
Here we are. All brown. How do you like. These Browns are very smart this year.
Herman
They're very nice, but I don't want exactly an all brown.
Spencer
Well, what did you have in mind?
Herman
Well, I sort of pictured a kind of a bluish brown.
Spencer
Bluish brown? Oh, no.
Herman
Yeah, yeah. I sort of a. Well, almost like a brownish blue.
Spencer
We don't have brownish blue.
Herman
Tell you what you do.
Spencer
Yes?
Herman
Show me a little blue suit.
Spencer
Spencer will be back in just a moment. But first, when you lift a cup of coffee, when you use a compact, when you pat a youngster's cheek, your hands show up. Your hands should have that Ivory look. Be softer, wonderfully whiter. Well, they can simply change to Ivory soap for washing dishes. You'll say just 12 days is all it took. Your hands. Now have that ivory look in your dishpan. Put pure ivory soap. In 12 days, your hands will show a noticeable new whiteness, a new softness. Yes, they'll have that Ivory look. Ivory soap is mild and pure. It's doctor's choice for babies. Delicate skin. In fact, more doctors advise Ivory soap for skin care than all other brands of soap combined. Incidentally, Ivory does a whole day's dishes for about a penny. Try it. You'll say just 12 days is all it took. My hands. Now have that ivory look. Be with us again tomorrow evening at the same time. For the invitation, let's listen to Spencer.
Narrator
Who says, there's always the guy who's your barber. He's a nice fella, means well, but. But he does get in your hair, doesn't he?
Spencer
Let's listen to Spencer is heard each night at the same time. Presented by Oxidol, the soap that gets closed white without bleaching. And Ivory soap, 99 and 44, 100% pure. It floats. This is CBS, the Columbia Broadcasting System.
Nicole Byer
We interrupt this program to bring you an important Wayfair message. Wayfair's got style tips for Every home. This is Nicole Byer helping you make those rooms flyer. Today's style tip when it comes to making a statement, treat bold patterns like neutrals. Go wild like an untamed animal. Print area rug under a rustic farmhouse table. From wayfair.com Ooh, beers. This has been your Wayfarer style tip to keep those interiors superior.
Spencer
Wayfair Every style, Every home.
Episode Title: Let's Listen To Spencer 1944-10-15 Bertha And Herman
Release Date: April 29, 2025
Host/Author: Harold's Old Time Radio
Description: Relive the charm of the Golden Age of Radio with classic shows that captivated families before the advent of television. This episode features the delightful antics of Bertha and Herman, offering timeless humor and insights into marital dynamics of the era.
"Let's Listen To Spencer" transports listeners back to 1944, centering around the married life of Bertha and Herman. Through witty dialogue and relatable scenarios, the episode explores the humorous tensions that arise when personal preferences clash within a marriage.
The episode unfolds with Bertha and Herman navigating the everyday challenges of married life, highlighting their playful yet contentious relationship. The central conflict revolves around Herman's desire to choose a new suit color, diverging from Bertha's preferred blue to his favored brown. This seemingly trivial disagreement escalates into a humorous exploration of marital compromise and individual expression.
The Victory Garden Dispute (03:39 - 04:13)
Wardrobe Tensions (04:13 - 06:19)
The Suit Shopping Escapade (06:19 - 14:41)
Bertha on Success:
Herman’s Frustration:
Bertha’s Rebuttal:
Herman’s Compromise:
Salesman’s Teasing:
Herman’s Last Attempt:
Marital Control vs. Personal Autonomy: The episode humorously portrays the delicate balance between a spouse’s authority and the other’s desire for independence.
Communication Barriers: Herman’s attempts to articulate his preferences are consistently thwarted by Bertha’s domineering personality, leading to comedic misunderstandings.
Compromise and Resentment: While the couple reaches compromises, underlying tensions suggest a need for better communication and mutual respect in decision-making.
"Bertha and Herman" offers a lighthearted yet insightful look into the dynamics of marital relationships in the 1940s. Through their interactions, listeners are entertained by the universal themes of control, compromise, and the quest for personal identity within a marriage. The episode concludes with Bertha once again asserting her dominance, leaving Herman with minimal choice, a scenario that resonates with timeless comedic storytelling.
This episode of "Let's Listen To Spencer" exemplifies the enduring appeal of old-time radio shows, combining relatable characters with humor and social commentary. Harold's Old Time Radio successfully brings to life the essence of the Golden Age of Radio, making it a cherished listen for both nostalgic audiences and new generations alike.