Life with Dexter xx-xx-xx (057) Dexter's Insomnia

Summary

Podcast Episode Summary: Life with Dexter – "Dexter's Insomnia" (Episode 057)
Release Date: August 10, 2025

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Introduction

In episode 057 of Life with Dexter titled "Dexter's Insomnia," listeners are introduced to a quintessential family scenario filled with humor, misunderstandings, and heartfelt moments. Hosted by Harold's Old Time Radio, this episode transports audiences back to the Golden Age of Radio, weaving a narrative that highlights the trials and tribulations of Dexter Dutton's peculiar struggle with insomnia every Saturday night. Through engaging dialogue and relatable characters, the episode explores themes of family dynamics, support, and the lengths one might go to help a loved one.

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Main Characters

• Dexter Dutton: The protagonist experiencing unusual insomnia on Saturday nights.
• Jessie Dutton: Dexter's concerned spouse, seeking solutions for his sleeplessness.
• Clara Dutton: Jessie's mother, offering wisdom and humor.
• Ashley Dutton: Dexter and Jessie's proactive and heroic child.
• Mr. Wilmot: A family acquaintance or relative involved in efforts to help Dexter.
• Kimberly (KG) Wilmot: Mr. Wilmot's spouse, supportive yet pragmatic.
• Paige Pleasant: Narrator and voice for Commonwealth Savings Bank advertisements.

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Plot Overview

Dexter's Sudden Insomnia (00:52 – 07:08)

The episode opens with Jessie and her mother, Clara, discussing Dexter’s newfound insomnia, which has plagued him every Saturday night for the past four weeks. Jessie expresses frustration over the disruption Dexter's sleeplessness causes:

Jessie Dutton (01:56): "Well, Clara, I've never told you this before, but for the past four weeks my husband's been suffering from Saturday night insomnia."

Clara empathizes, reflecting on Dexter's previously impeccable ability to eat and sleep without issues. Their conversation sets the stage for the family's quest to help Dexter overcome his condition.

Attempts to Cure Insomnia (07:08 – 14:50)

Jessie, with the help of Mr. Wilmot and their child Ashley, devises various strategies to induce sleep in Dexter. These include:

• Physical Activity: Mr. Wilmot suggests engaging Dexter in physical tasks to tire him out. Dexter reluctantly participates, leading to humorous exchanges about his reluctance and physical endurance.

• Generous Dining: The family serves Dexter an abundance of food, believing that overeating will make him too full to sleep. Dexter, however, humorously resists, claiming he's a minimal eater:

  Dexter Dutton (12:02): "Overeating. If I ate this, including the plate, knife and fork, I'd still be under eating."

Despite their efforts, Dexter remains awake, showcasing the challenges of addressing insomnia.

Misunderstanding and Heroic Efforts (14:50 – 25:15)

As Dexter's insomnia persists, his odd behavior leads his children, Jessie and Ashley, to mistakenly believe there is a burglar in the house. Their fear triggers a series of comedic and heroic attempts to protect the family:

• Armed Vigilance: Armed with a loaded rifle, Jessie plans to confront the perceived intruder, while Ashley prepares to call the police. Their over-the-top reactions add a layer of humor to the situation.

• Confrontation and Resolution: The misunderstanding culminates when Dexter, unable to sleep, inadvertently reveals the non-existence of a burglar. The family's efforts to secure the house highlight their deep concern for Dexter, albeit through exaggerated means.

Climax and Family Reconciliation (25:15 – End)

In the final act, Clara arrives, bringing clarity to the situation. She reveals that Dexter's insomnia was a simple case of overactive thoughts rather than an actual burglary threat. The family gathers for a planned picnic, symbolizing unity and the resolution of misunderstandings.

Jessie Dutton (25:32): "We're all here to have a party. A wacko party to celebrate Dexter's insomnia."

The episode concludes on a light-hearted note, reinforcing the importance of communication and familial support.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Jessie Dutton (01:56): "Well, Clara, I've never told you this before, but for the past four weeks my husband's been suffering from Saturday night insomnia."

• Mr. Wilmot (05:04): "It seems to me you're forcing this on yourself. You've made up your mind. You're going to have insomnia. So you'll have it."

• Dexter Dutton (12:02): "Overeating. If I ate this, including the plate, knife and fork, I'd still be under eating."

• Ashley Dutton (19:04): "A burglar?"

• Jessie Dutton (25:32): "We're all here to have a party. A wacko party to celebrate Dexter's insomnia."

• Paige Pleasant (08:10): "I was rather intrigued the other day at something I heard at the Commonwealth Savings Bank..."

• Dexter Dutton (28:00): "If money can buy it, saving will get it. So Bank Commonwealth for a car or a bike or just a rainy day..."

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Themes and Insights

1. Family Dynamics and Support: The episode masterfully portrays how a family rallies together to support a member in distress, even if their methods are flawed or humorous. Dexter's insomnia becomes a focal point for showcasing the unity and occasional chaos within the Dutton household.

2. Miscommunication and Misunderstanding: The misinterpretation of Dexter's behavior as a potential burglar highlights how lack of communication can lead to unnecessary panic and actions. This serves as a comedic exploration of human nature and familial bonds.

3. Humor in Adversity: Despite the serious nature of insomnia, the episode infuses humor through exaggerated responses and character interactions, making the narrative both entertaining and relatable.

4. Financial Security: Through recurring advertisements by Paige Pleasant for Commonwealth Savings Bank, the episode subtly emphasizes the importance of financial planning and security, paralleling Dexter's search for peace of mind from his insomnia.

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Conclusion

"Dexter's Insomnia" is a delightful installment of Life with Dexter that encapsulates the essence of family life with a comedic twist. By blending relatable issues with humor and old-time radio charm, the episode offers both entertainment and subtle life lessons. Listeners are left with a warm appreciation for familial bonds and the humorous side of overcoming personal challenges.

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Transcript

[Paige Pleasant]

The Commonwealth Savings bank of Australia. The bank for all the family Paige Pleasant presenting the show for all the family life with Dexter.

[Dexter Dutton]

If money can buy it, saving will get it Commonwealth. Now, for a car or a bike or just a rainy day Be sure to save the friendly Commonwealth way so listen to this advice and start right today to Bank Commonwealth Safe. Commonwealth Bank Commonwealth.

[Paige Pleasant]

Now, Dexter Dutton. He's usually one of the best eaters and sleepers there is. He can eat anything at any time and sleep at the drop of a hat. However, there was a time when Dexter actually had a session of insomnia. And it wasn't ordinary insomnia either, because he only suffered from it on Saturday nights. Now, let me tell you about last Saturday night. In fact, I'll tell you about what happened from 3 o' clock in the afternoon when Clara called in to see Jessie.

[Clara]

Jessie, dear, I just thought I'd pop in and see if I could help you with anything for this evening.

[Jessie]

Oh, no, Clara, there's nothing really. When you. When you and Kimberly are coming to dinner, it's no trouble at all. I'm just going to cook a simple roast, that's all.

[Clara]

Oh, darling, your roasts are delicious. Remember this, though, Jessie, the picnic we're all going on tomorrow is my baby entirely. The Wilmots are dining with you tonight. But tomorrow the Duttons are picnicking with us.

[Jessie]

Oh, thank you, Clara. Oh, dear. I only hope I get enough sleep tonight to feel like a picnic tomorrow.

[Clara]

Enough sleep. Jessie, dear, what's on your mind? Oh, what's bothering you?

[Jessie]

Well, Clara, I've never told you this before, but for the past four weeks my husband's been suffering from Saturday night insomnia. Saturday night?

[Clara]

What?

[Jessie]

Er. Well, one Saturday night a month ago, Dexter couldn't get to sleep all night. And every Saturday night since, it's become a sort of a. Well, a sort of an understood thing that he's going to lie awake till Sunday morning. And he does.

[Clara]

Oh, my goodness. Well, it's not very nice for Dexter. But it shouldn't cause you to lose your sleep, Jessie.

[Ashley]

Shouldn't cause.

[Jessie]

Oh, Clara, look, when Dexter suffers from anything, everyone else has to suffer with him. Yesterday, you know what? He cut his finger with a knife. And his pain, it was nothing compared with what we had to suffer listening to the agonizing moans and groans.

[Clara]

Oh, yes, yes, I know what you mean, dear. All men are like that. Kimberly fell down our back steps one day and he wasn't happy until he'd made me fall down them.

[Jessie]

You don't Mean he. He got up and then pushed you down?

[Clara]

Oh no, Jessie dear, no. I fell down them from laughing too much.

[Jessie]

Oh dear. Oh Clara. Wives should never laugh at their husbands. They don't like it.

[Clara]

I know dear, but how can we help it? Men are such funny looking things.

[Jessie]

Yes, Dexter doesn't look funny to me when he's lying awake and keeping me awake every Saturday night. Does your husband ever suffer from insomnia? Never.

[Clara]

Jesse. Never. Kimberly sleeps like a great big log. But then why shouldn't he? That's what he is.

[KG]

Kg, I was wondering. After we all have dinner tonight and after the women and children have gone to bed, would you care to join me in a game of two handed rummy?

[Mr. Wilmot]

Well, I don't know. I suppose we could play for an hour or so.

[KG]

I don't mean for an hour or so. I mean all night.

[Mr. Wilmot]

All night? Are you crazy? Why should we play two handed rummy all night?

[KG]

Well, because it's Saturday night and I must have something to do and someone to talk to.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Why don't you try sleeping? Then you can talk to yourself and not have to listen.

[KG]

You don't understand at all. This is Saturday and I haven't had a wink of sleep on a Saturday night for the past four weeks. I thought you knew how I suffer from Saturday night insomnia.

[Mr. Wilmot]

No, I didn't know that. But ever since you've worked for me, I've known you suffered from Monday to Friday sleeping sickness.

[KG]

This is serious. It's no joking matter tonight. I just know I won't get one minute's rest. I'll lie awake throughout the whole night.

[Mr. Wilmot]

It seems to me you're forcing this on yourself. You've made up your mind. You're going to have insomnia. So you'll have it.

[KG]

It's happened four weeks in a row, so why not tonight?

[Mr. Wilmot]

That's defeatism if ever I heard it. You should use the art of mind over matter.

[KG]

Mind over matter? Oh, maybe I could if I tried.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Second thoughts? You might be wasting your time. You've got plenty of matter. But what are you gonna put over us? Look Dexter, why is it you don't sleep Saturdays and yet you sleep the rest of the week?

[KG]

I haven't got a clue. Other nights I can sleep soundly from 9 o' clock till 7:30 in the morning.

[Mr. Wilmot]

9 till 7:30. Well that's enough to make up for missing one night. In fact, with that sleep you could miss four nights a week.

[KG]

I appreciate my sleep and I need every bit of it. Busy Men like you and me really need our sleep.

[Mr. Wilmot]

We don't need 10 and a half hours. We're not growing boys.

[KG]

You are. You're still growing. Sideways.

[Jessie]

Hi, dad.

[Ashley]

Hi, Mr. Wilmot. What's cooking?

[Mr. Wilmot]

I'm cooking at the moment over your father's strange sense of humor.

[Ashley]

Oh, you get used to it when you've lived with it as long as I have. Oh, listen, dad, Compost and I have been giving some thought to this Saturday insomnia of yours.

[KG]

Oh, have you now?

[Jessie]

Mm.

[Ashley]

And we've come to the conclusion there must be a good reason why you don't sleep Saturday nights. And yet you sleep other nights.

[KG]

Look, there's no good reason.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Maybe the children are right. Ashley, have you any theories to offer?

[Jessie]

Sure. I've got two.

[Ashley]

One is that on Saturdays, dad usually sits around all day and does nothing. He's not active.

[Mr. Wilmot]

You can eliminate that one. All week he sits around and does nothing at the office.

[KG]

That isn't true, cagey, and you know it. You keep harping on.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Oh, I'm sorry. I was only trying out some of your corny humor. All right, we'll grant the fact that Dexter isn't as active on Saturdays as other days. What's the second?

[Ashley]

Well, the second is that dad always eats too much for dinner every Saturday night.

[KG]

I do not. I'm a very small eater. At all times, I eat like a bird.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Yes, I've seen you. The bird's a vulture. Dex, do you recall what you had last Saturday evening for dinner?

[KG]

No. No, I don't, but it wasn't much because, well, I'm just a normal eater.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Normal for a lion, but not for a man.

[Ashley]

Now, I remember what dad ate last week on account of Mum cooked a big steak and kidney pie. And that's Dad's favor. He had three helpings of the pie.

[KG]

And then I did no such thing. I distinctly remember. Now, I only had two helpings of pie.

[Ashley]

I'm sorry to contradict, dad, but I remember you having three helpings of something.

[KG]

It was three helpings of soup before the pie.

[Ashley]

Yep, that's right. Dad had three helpings of soup followed by two large serves of steak and kidney pie with loads of mashed potatoes, green peas and cauliflower with white sauce.

[KG]

But I only had one bowl of side salad.

[Mr. Wilmot]

I am frightened to ask this, but did he top it off with any sweets?

[Jessie]

Yeah.

[Ashley]

Now, what were they?

[KG]

All I had was two tiny helpings of suet pudding with honey.

[Ashley]

Yep, that was it. But the helpings weren't so tiny. Dad Cause I remember you saying there wasn't room on your plate for the ice cream.

[Mr. Wilmot]

The ice cream?

[KG]

I happen to like suet pudding topped off with a dab or two of ice cream.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Ashley, is that all your father had for his dinner?

[KG]

Yes, it is. Unless you want to count a few measly cracker biscuits and cheese.

[Paige Pleasant]

I was rather intrigued the other day at something I heard at the Commonwealth Savings Bank. Two men were talking in the bank and one said, why is it you save so regularly, Ted? And Ted replied, I save because he gives me more mileage for my money. Now the other man looked bewildered. So Ted went on. What I mean is, it makes my money go further. I've always got money in my Commonwealth Savings bank account to buy what I need. I can always buy for cash. And I find I get many a bargain that way. In addition, I get interest on my savings. So you see, I get it everyway. And my money does go further. The last I saw the other chef was when he walked over to open a new account. And if you want to get more mileage out of your money, you too should open a Commonwealth Savings bank account. Visit the bank next payday, and from then on, week by week, Bank Commonwealth.

[Jessie]

Oh, come on, everyone. Let's sit up and have this while it's hot. Dexter, will you start calming? Where is Dexter?

[Ashley]

Dad should be back any minute. We sent him out for a constitutional.

[Mr. Wilmot]

We made him go for a run to the shopping center and back. He left here at 6:12. We told him to move at the rate of five miles an hour. So he should come through the front door at 6:27. Another few minutes.

[Clara]

Kimberly, what is all this about?

[Jessie]

I don't understand, Mummy.

[Ashley]

We're making sure Daddy doesn't stay awake all night tonight.

[KG]

Oh, I see.

[Jessie]

You're trying to make him tired.

[Ashley]

We sure are. An hour ago, Mr. Wilmot made dad dig a huge hole in his backyard.

[Clara]

Good gracious. But what's the hole for?

[Mr. Wilmot]

Nothing. As soon as Dexter dug it deep enough, I made him fill it in again.

[Ashley]

Well, if Daddy doesn't sleep tonight, it won't be our fault.

[Mr. Wilmot]

No, sir. Jesse, you should have seen your husband skipping before he dug the hole.

[Clara]

You had him skipping, too.

[Ashley]

400 ordinary skips plus 300 peppers.

[KG]

Oh, dear.

[Clara]

The poor man.

[Ashley]

Dad hadn't even got his win from skipping when Mr. Wilmot made him start on the hole.

[Clara]

It's a wonder Dexter didn't jump in the hole. Ask you to fill it in, Clara.

[Jessie]

If all this makes Dexter have a sound, night's Sleep. I'll be forever grateful to your husband. Anyhow, let's commence dinner before it gets cold.

[Clara]

Oh, now, Kimberly, you can carve the roast for Jesse dear and serve the vegetables.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Yes, dear. All right, pass your plates, everyone. The marathon sprinter should be here any minute. But it's no good letting this beautiful beef go cold. Who likes the outside cut? That's yours.

[Clara]

Oh, Jesse dear, this is one of the nicest pieces of beef I've ever tasted. I really must change to your butcher.

[Ashley]

I can't understand what's keeping dad.

[Jessie]

He should be back by now.

[Mr. Wilmot]

He's probably waving his thumb somewhere, trying to hitchhike.

[KG]

Help me, somebody. Oh, please. I'm finished. It's the end.

[Jessie]

Oh, Dexter, don't talk rot. Sit down and have your dinner.

[Ashley]

What happened?

[KG]

I ran. All the way to the shopping centre. Hundreds of miles it is.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Slightly over half a mile, to be exact.

[KG]

Don't split hairs. I ran all the way there and then started back, and that's when I got a stitch in my side and a cramp in my leg.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Never mind extra. It's all for your own good. Now, let me serve you some dinner.

[KG]

Oh, yeah? Well, thanks. I'm starved.

[Mr. Wilmot]

There we are. That should curb the appetite.

[KG]

Yeah. Well, what. What is that supposed. Where's my dinner?

[Mr. Wilmot]

That is your dinner. And you'll find it a delicious piece of beef.

[KG]

How can I find it anything when I can't see it? Jesse, will you make KG stop joking and give me some dinner?

[Jessie]

Now, Dexter, we all agree that it could be overeating that's giving you this Saturday night. Insomnia.

[KG]

Overeating. If I ate this, including the plate, knife and fork, I'd still be under eating. Now, look, if you don't mind, kg, I'll have four or five thick slices of meat with several potatoes and masses of vegetables.

[Mr. Wilmot]

You'll have what you've got in front of you and like it. I'm making absolutely sure that tonight you sleep as you've never slept before.

[KG]

If I do, it'll be one big sleep. I'm sure to die of malnutrition. Jessie, are you asleep?

[Jessie]

Dexter, you've asked me that four times in the last half hour. And I've told you four times. Yes, I'm sound asleep.

[KG]

I. I'm sorry, dear, but it's only that I feel so badly keeping you awake. Maybe I should go downstairs onto the couch.

[Jessie]

There's no need for that. If you'll just stop talking and try to get some sleep.

[KG]

I have tried. It's no good I know I'm not going to get a wink of red.

[Jessie]

You will if you stop thinking about it. See if you can make your mind a complete blank. For you it shouldn't be difficult.

[KG]

There's no need to be sarcastic at a time like this. Not getting to sleep is no joking matter.

[Jessie]

Don't I know it. Dexter, have you thought about trying the old cure of counting sheep?

[KG]

No, I. Well, I suppose it's an idea. I'll start counting right now.

[Jessie]

You do that, dear. Good night.

[KG]

Night, dear. I'll let you know if it works. I've got to concentrate on nothing but sheep jumping. Offense. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Jesse, it's starting to work already. I'm getting sleepy.

[Jessie]

That's fine. Keep counting.

[KG]

Yeah. 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11. Twat. Twe, twe.

[Jessie]

Dexter, what is it?

[KG]

Number 12's got his leg caught in the fence.

[Jessie]

Look, dear, on second thought, it might be better if you do so downstairs on the couch. I'm so tired. I've gotta have some rest.

[KG]

Very well. I'll go downstairs and count sheep. The last thing I want to do is keep you awake, dear. Your getting to sleep is my first consideration.

[Jessie]

Yes, thank you, dear. See you in the morning.

[KG]

I'll see you in the morning. Night, Jessie.

[Jessie]

Night, dear. Oh, dear. Oh, dear.

[KG]

Oh, dear. Sorry, dear. Where'll I get a spare blanket?

[Jessie]

In the whole cupboard.

[KG]

Oh, yeah. All right. Night, now.

[Jessie]

Night, Dexter.

[KG]

Jesse, are the sheets with the blankets?

[Jessie]

Huh? Yes, dear.

[KG]

Oh, that's all. Good night, dear.

[Jessie]

Good night. What a night.

[KG]

I'm awfully sorry, Jesse.

[Jessie]

Oh, Dexter. What is it?

[KG]

My pillow. Do you mind if I take my own pillow?

[Jessie]

Take everything, but please take yourself downstairs.

[KG]

Well, I'm going right now. I'm more likely to sleep downstairs because I won't be concerned about you losing your rest. The last thing I want.

[Jessie]

I know, dear. The last thing you want is to keep me awake. Good night.

[KG]

27,000, 463. 27,000, 464. 27,000, 465. 27,000, 466. 31,000, 206. 31,000, 207. 31,000. Oh, it's. This is useless. I'm never going to get to sleep this way. The last 2,000 sheep I've counted have gone to sleep. But I haven't. Oh. Three o' clock and I'm wider awake than I was before I came downstairs. If only I had someone to talk to. I've got that feeling of depression. I'll go mad if I don't have someone to talk to. There's a light on next door in KG's bedroom. Oh, what a stroke of luck. He must be suffering from insomnia too. I'll call him up on the phone. He can't be mad with me after what he did to me this evening. Well, come on, answer your phone. You must be awake. Your light's on.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Who is this?

[KG]

It's me, Dexter. I'm sorry to be ringing you at this hour of the morning, cagey. But I knew you must be awake. You are awake.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Why, you stupid bathead. What do you think you're doing? I was sound asleep.

[KG]

I mean, you couldn't have been. I wouldn't have phoned if I thought you were asleep.

[Mr. Wilmot]

I was dead to the world. You just interrupted me doing a hula dance with Grace Kelly.

[KG]

Oh, well. But your bedroom light was on. In fact, it's still on.

[Mr. Wilmot]

That isn't my bedroom light, lame brain. As the bathroom. And I couldn't care less whether I left it on or off. What do you want? And it had better be to tell me my house is on fire.

[KG]

No, Keiji, it's only my insomnia. I can't get to sleep.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Listen, brother, if I were in there, you'd get some sleep. I'd put you up with the first heavy object I could lay my hands on.

[KG]

Kg, please don't be mad with me. I've been wide awake ever since you and Clara left here this evening. It's now after 3 o' clock and if I don't have someone to talk to, I'm likely to go crazy.

[Mr. Wilmot]

You mean you're likely to go a little crazier than usual. What do you expect me to do? Sit up till daylight with this phone in my hand?

[KG]

Oh, I was hoping you might come in here and we'll sit and chat or play cards.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Oh, won't that be ducky? Yeah, or you could rake out Ashley's train set and we'll play chuchu.

[KG]

Oh, please, Keji, won't you come in, if only for an hour?

[Mr. Wilmot]

All right, all right. I'll sneak out of that waking Claire and see you in a couple of minutes. But you're a great big turkey.

[KG]

Oh, thank you, Keiji. Thank you very much. And really and truly, I'm sorry for waking you. I'm terribly sorry.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Don't be sorry about that. Think nothing of it. I have to get up to answer the phone anyway.

[Ashley]

Janie, will you wake up? Compost. Wake.

[Jessie]

I'm not.

[Ashley]

Ashley, what is it? Keep your voice down. I don't want to wake Mum or Dad, but I think there's a burglar downstairs. A burglar?

[KG]

Shh.

[Ashley]

Yes. Mum and dad must be sound asleep. And it's the first sleep they've had on a Saturday for ages. Now, you and I can handle this burglar and maybe get our names in the paper. Oh, Ashley, how do you know it's a burglar? A while ago, I heard some creeping round our side passage. And when I looked out my window, I saw someone knicking in the back door. Now, I locked that door myself tonight, so it must be a burglar with a skeleton key. Well, what can we do? We'll have to wait, Daddy. We will not. Now, I've got Dad's rifle and it's loaded. If we both sneak quietly downstairs, I can hold them at gunpoint while you phone the police. And you expect Mummy and Daddy to sleep through all this? I might. And think what heroes we'll be. I've always wanted to be a hero, and this is my chance. Wouldn't you like to be a hero? I'd rather like to be alive. Oh, Ashley, I don't know. Well, maybe if you go ahead with.

[Jessie]

The gun and I'll follow. Well. Behind you.

[Ashley]

Good on you, Sis. Now pop out of bed quickly and get into a gown or something. We'll have these characters bailed up and carted off by the police. And the family might know a thing about it.

[Jessie]

Till tomorrow.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Surely you must be tired by now.

[KG]

Just another few hands. I might start to feel drowsy then.

[Ashley]

Okay, buster, reach for the screw. Daddy.

[Jessie]

Dad.

[Ashley]

Mr. Wilmore.

[KG]

Ashley. Well, what's the meaning of this?

[Ashley]

Oh, he thought you were burglars.

[KG]

Burglars?

[Ashley]

Oh, gee, Dad, I heard noises and saw someone come in our back door. I thought you were sound asleep upstairs.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Ashley, would you do me a favor? Let me have that rifle for a moment.

[Ashley]

Okay, but what for?

[Mr. Wilmot]

I just want to try out a little experiment. There must be some way to make your father sleep.

[Paige Pleasant]

As we now know, it wasn't necessary for Janie and Ashley to deal with the burglar. But the main consideration is they were ready to face up to their responsibilities had they been called upon. And I think that is typical of most young people today. They have a common sense approach to life and are ready to face facts. That is why thousands and thousands of young people who have just started work have opened Commonwealth Savings bank accounts in the past few weeks. These young people realize that if they are to achieve their ambitions, they'll need money. Not just the small sums of money, but such as they get each week in their pay envelopes, but the big money they'd accumulate by saving in the Commonwealth Savings Bank. Most young people realize that they haven't much time to save because once they turn 20, their most expensive time begins. It is then they want to get married or buy a car, go for a trip abroad or set up business or do something else that costs real money. So if there are any young wage earners who've not yet opened a Commonwealth Savings bank account, see about it next payday. And from then on, week by week, Bank Commonwealth.

[KG]

Ashley, you must put down a card before you pick one up.

[Ashley]

Dad, I don't know what I'm doing. I'm so tired. Oh, so my.

[Mr. Wilmot]

You children should complain. I've been here with your father since three o'. Clock.

[KG]

But the point is, it's now after four and it's silly for anyone to think of going back to bed. The sun will be up before you know it.

[Ashley]

Yes, and I'm one son who wishes he'd never got up.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Dexter, it's your go. Put out a card.

[KG]

Do you think maybe we've played enough rummy?

[Jessie]

Here, here.

[Mr. Wilmot]

That's the most intelligent thing you've said. No more rummy.

[KG]

Let's play Snakes and Ladders instead.

[Ashley]

What?

[KG]

Oh, Dadd and Ladders.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Are you sure you wouldn't prefer Drop the Hanky or Postman's Knock?

[KG]

Oh, no, there aren't enough of us for that. I tell you what. We could have a session of Pin the Tail on the Donkey. Or how about a peanut hunt?

[Mr. Wilmot]

That does it. I'm off home to get a couple of hours sleep. I've done my duty for tonight.

[Ashley]

Dad, couldn't we all go to bed? He's sure to sleep now after all this.

[KG]

Who could that be at the door? Disarm?

[Mr. Wilmot]

I hope it's the police. They might put you in a nice cozy cell where you can enjoy your insomnia without bothering us.

[KG]

Who's there?

[Ashley]

It's me.

[Clara]

Oh, Dexter, I'm terribly sorry for calling this unholy hour, but I saw your light on and I knew that you must be awake with your insomnia. Dear, I'm. I'm in a dreadful state. I've got to see Jessica.

[KG]

Why? What happened?

[Clara]

Last night I had an argument with my husband. We have one every night. But last night. Last night he threatened to leave me. He does that every night too. But a while ago, Dexter, I woke up suddenly and I found him gone. Oh, Dexter has left me.

[KG]

Oh dear kg, did you hear that? Clara's husband's left her.

[Mr. Wilmot]

You stupid bird brain. Can't you tell her I'm here?

[Jessie]

Kimberly.

[KG]

Oh. Oh, that's right. He's here. Katie's your husband. Come inside, Clara.

[Ashley]

Hi, Mrs. Wilmot.

[Clara]

Kimberly, what are you doing here?

[Mr. Wilmot]

I'm playing cards, dear.

[Clara]

Huh.

[Mr. Wilmot]

There's nothing I like better than four handed rummy at 4:30 on Sunday morning.

[KG]

Oh, Clara. You see, I couldn't sleep and wanted someone to keep me company. So I phoned KG and well, he kindly agreed to come in. The children came downstairs thinking we were burglars.

[Mr. Wilmot]

You see clearer your loving little hubby hasn't flown from the love list. I'm still your devoted spouse.

[Jessie]

I hate you.

[Clara]

And the sooner you get out of my house and leave, the better I like it.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Here we go again. Clara, if you think I won't leave, then let me tell you, I'm getting out just as soon as I possibly leave.

[Jessie]

What's going on down here?

[Ashley]

Hi mom. Children, why don't you.

[Jessie]

Clara, Kimberly.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Yes, we're all here. Jesse. Come and join the gang.

[KG]

Jesse. It's a long story, but. Well, it all started when I was.

[Jessie]

Dexter, don't go into one of your long stories. Can someone tell me briefly what is going on?

[Clara]

Yes, Jesse dear. We're all here to have a party. A wacko party to celebrate Dexter's insomnia.

[Jessie]

Now Clara, are you sure there's nothing I can take on this picnic? It's not fair for you to supply everything for my hungry family.

[Clara]

Oh Jessie, you supplied dinner last night, dear, for me and my hungry husband. And now it's our turn. Kimberly's packing everything into the car and there's loads of food.

[Ashley]

Oh mummy darling. Do I look alright in these shorts?

[Jessie]

Yes, Janie, they look fine for a picnic.

[Ashley]

Mummy darling, do I look alright in this moth eaten al sweater?

[Jessie]

Ashley, you look like you always look terrible, but you'll do.

[Mr. Wilmot]

Righto everyone. The car's packed and rearing to go. Are you Duttons all ready to leave?

[Jessie]

Yes, I think we've got everything. Come on, Dexter, we're going now.

[Ashley]

Dexter. Where are you?

[Jessie]

Dexter? Oh no.

[Paige Pleasant]

Apparently there are many reasons why people cannot sleep at night. And it's safe to say that some of those reasons have something to do with money. Some people cannot sleep soundly because they haven't enough money to do the things they want to do. Others have so much money in the house that they're frightened of fire and burglars. People who save each payday in a Commonwealth Savings bank account have no cause for sleepless nights. They know that their money is readily available to them. Whenever they want it, they can get it. When a bargain comes along, they can use it to meet an emergency. Which simply means that in good times and bad, your Commonwealth Savings bank account is your constant friend and standby. So don't take risks with your money. Every time you pass a Commonwealth Savings bank office, ask yourself whether you are carrying more money than you can afford to lose. If you are, slip into the bank. And from then on, week by week, Bank Commonwealth.

[Dexter Dutton]

If money can buy it, saving will get it. So Bank Commonwealth for a car or a bike or just a rainy day, be sure to save the friendly Commonwealth way. So listen to this advice and start right today to Bank Commonwealth Saint Commonwealth Bank Commonwealth now.

[Paige Pleasant]

Life With Dexter is produced by Noel Judd and written by Willie Fernell. And this is John Donne inviting you to enjoy life with Dexter at the same time next week from this station. And remember, you'll always enjoy life with a Commonwealth Savings bank account.