NBC The Jell-O Show Starring Jack Benny1938-12-25 - Jacks Christmas Open House

Summary

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Podcast Summary

NBC The Jell-O Show Starring Jack Benny: "Jack's Christmas Open House"

Original Broadcast Date: December 25, 1938
Host: Harold's Old Time Radio (Harold)
Summary Date: December 7, 2025

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Episode Overview

This festive episode of the classic "Jack Benny Program" transports listeners to Jack Benny’s home in Beverly Hills for a warm, comedic Christmas open house. Featuring regulars like Mary Livingston, Rochester, Don Wilson, Kenny Baker, and Phil Harris, the show unfolds as a rollicking mixture of witty banter, running gags, celebrity cameos, and slapstick mishaps—all surrounding the chaos of preparing for a holiday gathering. Ostensibly glamorous, Jack’s party becomes a showcase for his trademark blend of self-deprecating humor and endearing holiday traditions.

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Key Discussion Points & Segments

1. Setting Up Jack's Christmas Open House

[01:53–05:00]

• Don Wilson warmly thanks the listeners:

  “We want to thank you, listeners, for your gift to us of friendship and loyalty during the past four and a half years.” (01:32)

• The program sets the scene with Jack and Mary Livingston decorating the Christmas tree—a fraught process riddled with jokes about Jack’s stinginess and the tree’s sorry state.
  • Mary: “I never saw such a droopy tree. It looks like Zazu fits in a green dress.” (02:32)
  • Jack: “All this tree needs is a few decorations.” (02:38)
• Recurring gags:
  • Arguments over missing candy canes.
  • Jack’s frugality about ornaments and saved tinfoil.
  • Rochester’s sarcastic one-liners.
    • Rochester: “That star has five points.”
      Jack: “It went down two points this last year.” (03:14–03:18)

2. The Guests Arrive (and the Snubs Roll In)

[05:07–09:44]

• Orchestra members arrive and are dispatched for “refreshments” (not-so-potent punch).
  • Rochester: “Take it easy, man. It ain’t nothing to get excited about.” (05:17)
• Jack lists a star-studded guest list, only for Mary to joke about her questionable dress choice.
• Kenny Baker arrives, bearing a “musical handkerchief” as a gift.
  • Kenny: “Yeah, every time you blow, your nose chimes ring.” (07:44)
• Multiple telegrams come in from celebrities like Robert Taylor, Barbara Stanwyck, and Ronald Coleman, all declining Jack’s invitation with outlandishly silly excuses.
  • Mary: “Dear Jack, terribly sorry that Ms. Stanwyck and I are unable to come... her dog, Rover, is quite ill.” (09:08)
  • Mary (reading as Rover): “I have a terrible headache. Signed, Rover.” (09:24)

3. Carols and Holiday Cheer

[10:07–13:00]

• Kenny leads the guests in singing classic carols, creating a bit of heartfelt holiday atmosphere amidst the banter.

4. Party Dynamics and Romantic Rivalries

[14:05–16:23]

• Jack is eager for the arrival of Barbara Whitney, hinting at romantic rivalry with Phil Harris.
• Misunderstandings and jealousies play out as Don Wilson flirts with Barbara, prompting Jack’s consternation.
  • Don: “Roses are red, violets are blue, Jello is tempting, and so are you.” (15:47)

5. Jack Prepares for Santa's Arrival

[16:34–18:09]

• Rochester signals someone at the back door—Andy's in charge of donning the Santa costume.
• Jack gives Andy slapstick instructions for his chimney entrance, complete with a salad fork/back scratcher/comb gift from Andy’s mother.
  • Andy: “It’s a combination salad fork and back scratcher... that's for your hair as you're going by.” (17:20–17:43)

6. The Eternal Kitchen Dilemma and More Telegrams

[18:22–21:12]

• More celebrity snubs via telegram (Clark Gable, Carol Lombard, Ginger Rogers).
  • Mary: “It says that we would love to be with you tonight, but we were invited somewhere else in the nick of time.” (18:29)
• The guests joke about the massive amount of uneaten food.
• Jack’s anticipation for Barbara’s effect on Phil Harris is palpable.
• Everyone dances (awkwardly) as the orchestra plays.
  • Mary: “Kenny, you’re marvelous. And believe me, I’m kidding.” (21:40)

7. The Party Reaches its Climax

[22:06–29:20]

• Phil Harris arrives with Joan Bennett; the gathering is complete.
  • Mary: “He calls every girl he takes out, ‘baby’... half of them you can’t even pronounce.” (24:09)
• Joan jokes about Mary’s dress; the women trade zingers.
• Jack and Joan reminisce about making the film "Artists and Models Abroad," leading to more banter.
  • Joan: “You really like it? …No, but it’s Christmas.” (24:23)
  • Jack: “I saw it 12 times.” (26:48)
  • Joan: “You know your part, Jeff.” (26:54)
• Under the mistletoe, Jack kisses Joan (and the house erupts in “Yippee!” and “Hooray!”).

8. Santa Gets Stuck & The Party Races On

[28:32–29:20]

• The guests gather for gift-giving, but Andy, as Santa, gets hilariously stuck in the chimney.
  • Andy/Santa: “Deaf? Nothing. I'm stuck in the chimney.” (29:07)
• Mary shrugs: “Let’s eat.” (29:14)
  The party moves to dinner, ending on a farcical note.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Don Wilson (Thanking the audience):

  “We want to thank you, listeners, for your gift to us of friendship and loyalty during the past four and a half years.” (01:32)

• Mary Livingston (on Jack’s tree):

  “I never saw such a droopy tree. It looks like Zazu fits in a green dress.” (02:32)

• Rochester (on diminished star):

  “Well, it went down two points this last year.” (03:18)

• Kenny Baker (explaining musical gifts):

  “Yeah, every time you blow, your nose chimes ring.” (07:44)

• Jack Benny (after falling off ladder):

  “Oh, my leg.” (14:41)
  “I hope somebody sent me a pair of tweezers.” (14:54)

• Mary Livingston, reading celebrity telegrams:

  “Dear Jack, terribly sorry that Ms. Stanwyck and I are unable to come... her dog, Rover, is quite ill.” (09:08)
  “Dear Jack, believe me, Mr. Taylor is telling the truth. I have a terrible headache. Signed, Rover.” (09:24)

• Don Wilson (Jello romance):

  “Roses are red, violets are blue, Jello is tempting, and so are you.” (15:47)

• Joan Bennett & Mary (fashion rivalry):

  “Gee, that's a pretty dress you've got on.”
  “Thanks. You really like it? No, but it’s Christmas.” (24:21–24:23)

• Jack Benny (about watching his film):

  “I saw it 12 times.” (26:48)

• Ending gag—Santa stuck:

  “Santa Claus...are you deaf? ...Deaf, nothing. I'm stuck in the chimney!” (29:07)

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Segment Timestamps for Reference

• Universal thank-yous & intro: 00:55–01:53
• Trimming the tree & first guests: 02:08–05:07
• Gift exchange & musical handkerchiefs: 07:22–08:13
• Comic telegrams: 09:01–09:38; 13:27–13:53; 18:22–18:38
• Carols: 10:07–13:00
• Jack’s romantic rivalry: 14:05–16:23
• Santa plan begins: 16:34–18:09
• Dancing scene: 21:34–22:00
• Phil Harris & Joan Bennett Arrive: 22:06–24:16
• Jack & Joan, mistletoe: 27:38–28:20
• Santa stuck in chimney: 28:49–29:20

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Final Thoughts

Jack Benny’s "Christmas Open House" episode is a time capsule of holiday cheer, quick-witted repartee, and vaudevillian antics. The joy comes not from plot twists but from the ensemble’s chemistry, relentless teasing, and gentle send-ups of stardom and holiday excess. Moments of warmth—a carol, a botched dinner, a joke-laden gift exchange—anchor the laughter, inviting listeners into an old-school Christmas family gathering, golden age Hollywood-style.

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Transcript

[Jack Benny]

Limu Emu and Doug.

[Liberty Mutual Announcer]

Here we have the Limu Emu in its natural habitat, helping people customize their car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual. Fascinating. It's accompanied by his natural ally, Doug.

[Jack Benny]

Limu is that guy with the binoculars watching us?

[Liberty Mutual Announcer]

Cut the camera. They see us.

[Jack Benny]

Only pay for what you [e-mail] Liberty. Liberty.

[Chorus Singer]

Liberty.

[Jack Benny]

Liberty. Savings vary underwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance Company and affiliates. Excludes Massachusetts.

JTF.

[Don Wilson]

The Jello Program, starring Jack Benny with Mary Livingston Phil Harris, Kenny Baker and yours truly, Don Wilson. The orchestra opens the program with this Can't Be Loved.

Ladies and gentlemen. You know, I've been thinking that today is a day of universal thank yous. Everybody's unwrapping Christmas gifts. Everybody's saying thank you to somebody else. And we want to say it, too. We want to thank you, listeners for your gift to us of friendship and loyalty during the past four and a half years. You made us mighty happy tuning in every Sunday night. And we hope that we, in turn, have helped make you happy and brought you some pleasant half hours. So for the makers of Jell O and for every one of us on the Jello program, thank you and merry Christmas.

That was this Can't Be Loved played by the orchestra. Now, ladies and gentlemen, this being Christmas Day, we look in on Jack Benny's home in Beverly Hills where he is holding open house for all his friends. Take it away.

[Mary Livingston]

Jingle bells, jingle bells Jingle around the table oh, what fun it is to ride in rumble seat with gables Jingle bells, jingle bells Dum da dum Mary.

[Jack Benny]

I wish you wouldn't jingle this ladder. I'm liable to fall off.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, I'm sorry, Jack.

[Jack Benny]

And hand me the rest of those ornaments. I want to get this tree decorated before the gang gets here.

[Mary Livingston]

It's a fine time to be trimming a Christmas tree. It should have been done a week ago.

[Jack Benny]

I wanted to look around and get a real good one.

[Mary Livingston]

I never saw such a droopy tree. It looks like Zazu fits in a green dress.

[Jack Benny]

Mary, all this tree needs is a few decorations. Now hand me up those candy canes.

[Mary Livingston]

Here you are.

[Jack Benny]

And hold the ladder. Hey, I had 12 of these candy canes. Now there's only 11. Where's the other one?

[Mary Livingston]

Don't look at me.

[Jack Benny]

I'm not looking at you. I'm asking you.

[Mary Livingston]

All right, I ate it. Here's 10 cents.

[Jack Benny]

Smarty. I bet you'd be surprised if I took it.

[Mary Livingston]

I wouldn't be surprised if you sued me.

[Jack Benny]

Mary, I want to get this finished? Hey, Rochester.

[Rochester]

Yes, boss?

[Jack Benny]

Where's that big glass star I told you to pack away last Christmas?

[Rochester]

You mean that shiny one with the three points on it?

[Jack Benny]

That star has five points.

[Rochester]

Well, it went down two points this last year.

[Jack Benny]

All right, bring it anyway. Mary, hand me some of that silver tinsel there.

[Mary Livingston]

Here you are. Say, Jack, are your socks dry yet?

[Jack Benny]

Yeah.

[Mary Livingston]

Well, take them off the tree people. Be here soon.

[Jack Benny]

Okay, now, hang on to the ladder, Mary. I want to fix these top branches here.

Hold tight now. Well, I'll be darned.

[Mary Livingston]

What's the matter, Jack?

[Jack Benny]

There's a little squirrel up here on the top. Hello, squirrel. Hello, nut.

Get away from me. Shoo. Mary, hand me that kewpie doll I won at Ocean Park. I'll hang that on the treetop.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, Jack, that looks so corny. Why don't you get rid of it?

[Jack Benny]

Listen, Mary, I threw over 100 baseballs to win this doll, and I'm gonna keep it.

[Mary Livingston]

That's right. Say, how much tin foil have you got saved up by now?

[Jack Benny]

About three tons.

[Rochester]

Oh, shut up.

[Jack Benny]

Hand me a couple of those popcorn balls.

[Rochester]

There's the door, Mr. Bennett. You want me to answer it?

[Jack Benny]

Look, Rochester, I'm up here on the ladder. My arms are full of ornaments. So, what do you think?

[Rochester]

Well, how long before you'll be down? Answer the door. Yes, sir.

[Jack Benny]

Say, Mary, this tree is beginning to look pretty good now, isn't it?

[Mary Livingston]

That tree wouldn't look good if Earl Carroll hung chorus girls on it.

[Jack Benny]

Oh, I don't know about that.

[Rochester]

Well, well. Happy Yuletide, gentlemen.

[Don Wilson]

Entree.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, Jack, they're the boys from Phil's orchestra.

[Jack Benny]

Gosh, what they did to my house last time they were here.

[Rochester]

Come in, fellas.

[Jack Benny]

Merry Christmas, everybody. Rochester, take the boys in the other room and give them some refreshment.

[Rochester]

You mean that punch you fixed up this afternoon?

[Jack Benny]

Yeah, help yourself, boys.

[Rochester]

Take it easy, man. It ain't nothing to get excited about.

[Jack Benny]

That Rochester doesn't think punch is any good unless you have to crawl away from the bowl.

Now, let's see.

[Mary Livingston]

Say, Jack, who's all coming over tonight anyway?

[Jack Benny]

Well, there's our whole gang, then. I invited some very important people. See Robert Taylor and Barbara Stanwyck. Clark Gable and Carol Lombard. Ronald Coleman and Ginger Rogers. Oh, a whole flock of them.

[Mary Livingston]

Well, gee, I ought to run home and put on a dress with a lower back.

[Jack Benny]

Lower back is down to San Diego now.

And. Oh, Mary, you want to hear something terrific? I asked Barbara Whitney to come here as my guest.

[Mary Livingston]

Barbara Whitney?

[Jack Benny]

Yeah, you Remember the girl I took away from Phil Harris?

[Mary Livingston]

The girl you took away from Phil?

[Jack Benny]

What are you laughing at?

[Mary Livingston]

That's like taking a hair away from John L. Lewis's eyebrows.

[Jack Benny]

Just the same, Phil will burn up when he sees her here.

[Mary Livingston]

Is she coming alone?

[Jack Benny]

No, I asked John Wilson to stop by and pick her up. Now, Mary, hand me some more of that tinsel. I want to get this tree finished. Well, I guess they're starting to arrive now, huh?

[Rochester]

Hey, Mr. Benny, are you still up on that ladder?

[Jack Benny]

Yes, I am.

[Rochester]

Okay, then I'll answer.

[Jack Benny]

Well, that's mighty sweet of you. You know, I think I'll put something on this bed.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, Jack, why don't you stop fussing with that tree and come down?

[Jack Benny]

No, Mary, Ms. Whitney will be here, and I want it to look beautiful.

[Rochester]

Hello, Rochester. Hello, Mr. Baker. Merry Christmas season felicitations and wipe your feet.

[Jack Benny]

Hiya, Kenny.

[Rochester]

Merry Christmas, everybody.

[Jack Benny]

Come on in, Kenny. Hang up your hat and coat and make yourself at home.

[Rochester]

Okay, Jack. Am I the first one here?

[Jack Benny]

No, the orchestra boys are in the other room. Hey, Kenny, don't hang your coat on the Christmas tree. Would need something.

It's not that bear.

[Rochester]

Well, say, Jack, here's a little present for you.

[Jack Benny]

It's nothing much, but I hope you like it. Oh, thanks, Kenny.

[Rochester]

Here, catch it.

[Jack Benny]

Gee, I wonder what it is.

[Mary Livingston]

I bet it's a baked apple.

[Jack Benny]

Bet it isn't. Say, it's a pretty package. Oh, Kenny, these are beautiful. They're the very latest thing, Jack. Musical handkerchiefs. Musical handkerchief?

[Rochester]

Yeah, every time you blow, your nose chimes rings.

[Jack Benny]

Well, I'll be darned. I can hardly wait till I catch a cold. Well, why don't you try one, Jack? Okay, I will. Now blow hard.

Oh, isn't that a novelty? I wonder how they ever made these.

[Mary Livingston]

They must have crossed a piece of Linner with a hunk of Zillow. Phone.

[Jack Benny]

Mary, you're positively brilliant.

[Rochester]

Say, Jack, as long as the orchestra boys are here, I'd like to go in the next room and brush up on my song.

[Jack Benny]

Oh, go ahead, Kenny. We'll want a little entertainment.

[Rochester]

Okay, see you later.

[Jack Benny]

Now, Mary, we've just got a few more things to put up, so hand me that big paper bell there.

[Mary Livingston]

K y, Jack.

[Jack Benny]

Hey, Rochester, there's the door again.

[Rochester]

I got my shoes off. Well, put them on and answer them. Ok.

[Jack Benny]

You know, Mary, the way Rochester has been acting lately, I've got a good mind not to give him his Christmas present.

[Mary Livingston]

What'd you get him, Jack?

[Jack Benny]

A brand new vacuum cleaner.

[Mary Livingston]

A vacuum cleaner?

[Jack Benny]

Yes.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, that's lovely. He can play with it on his day off.

[Jack Benny]

Well, at least it's something practical.

[Rochester]

Here you are, boss. A couple of telegrams for you.

[Jack Benny]

Telegrams? See where they're from, Mary.

[Mary Livingston]

Okay.

[Jack Benny]

Christmas greetings, I suppose, huh?

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, Jack, this wire's from Robert Taylor.

[Jack Benny]

Oh, Bob. Huh?

[Mary Livingston]

Yes.

[Rochester]

He says that.

[Mary Livingston]

Dear Jack, terribly sorry that Ms. Stanwyck and I are unable to come to your party tonight. As Ms. Stanwyck's dog, Rover is quite ill.

[Jack Benny]

I don't believe it. That's just a thin excuse. Hmm. What's the other wire, Mary?

[Mary Livingston]

Here it is. It says, dear Jack, believe me, Mr. Taylor is telling the truth. I have a terrible headache. Signed, Rover.

[Jack Benny]

Well, it doesn't take Sherlock Holmes to see, though, through those wires. I'm glad they're not coming. That burns me up.

[Rochester]

Hey, Jack, should I try my song now?

[Jack Benny]

Yes, go ahead and try it. What do I care? Mary, hand me some more of that lousy tinsel.

[Chorus Singer]

O little town of Bethlehem how still we see thee Light.

Above thy deep and dreamless sleep the silent stars go.

[Rochester]

By.

[Chorus Singer]

Yet in the dark street Shineth the everlasting light.

The hopes and fears of all the years Are met indeed tonight.

Away in a manger no crib for his bed the little Lord Jesus Lay down his sweet head.

The stars in the sky Looking down where he lay the little Lord Jesus.

Asleep in the head.

O come O ye faithful Joyful and triumphant O come ye O come ye to Bethlehem.

Come and behold him Born the King of angels O come let us adore him O come let us adore him O come Lamb of a joy in Christ.

The Lord.

O Holy Child of Bethlehem Descend to us, we pray.

Cast off our sin and enter in Be born in us.

[Rochester]

Today.

[Jack Benny]

See this side here could stand a few more ornaments. Mary, hold a ladder.

[Mary Livingston]

Okay.

[Jack Benny]

And hold it tight. Remember what happened the last time I climbed a tree?

[Mary Livingston]

Yeah. You saw the Rose bowl game.

[Jack Benny]

I don't mean that time.

[Rochester]

Wow, look at all those decorations. Hey, Mary, what's that round, shiny thing.

[Mary Livingston]

On top Jack's head?

[Jack Benny]

It is not. It's a silver moon.

[Rochester]

Hey, boss, another telegram for you.

[Jack Benny]

Take it, Mary. I wonder if I should put a popcorn ball on top there instead of a star.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, Jack. This telegram is from Ronald Coleman.

[Jack Benny]

Oh, Ronnie. Huh? What does he say?

[Mary Livingston]

He says, dear sir.

Regret exceedingly that I cannot attend your holiday gathering. And incidentally, how did you get my address?

[Jack Benny]

How did I get his address? He lives right in back of me.

[Mary Livingston]

Well, there's another One off your list?

[Jack Benny]

Yeah. Oh, darn it. That top bulb went out. Hold the ladder tight, Mary.

I guess I can reach it.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, Jack, here comes John Wilson and Barbara Whitney up the front step.

[Jack Benny]

Oh, fine. Let him in, Mary.

[Mary Livingston]

Okay.

[Jack Benny]

Gee, I hope Barbara will like the Christmas present I sent her.

[Mary Livingston]

Hello, John. Merry Christmas.

[Don Wilson]

Same to you, Mary.

[Mary Livingston]

Merry Christmas, everybody. Hello, Jack.

[Rochester]

Oh, hello, Barbara. Merry.

[Jack Benny]

Christmas.

Oh, my leg.

[Rochester]

Was that the door, Mr. Benny?

[Jack Benny]

No, that was me. I fell off the ladder.

[Rochester]

Oh, I won't answer. Then.

[Jack Benny]

Help me up, Don. Oh, I sat on some ornaments. I hope somebody sent me a pair of tweezers.

[Don Wilson]

Here, give me your hand, Jack. That's too bad.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, I'm awfully sorry, Jack. It's all my fault.

[Jack Benny]

No, it isn't, Barbara. I'd have probably fallen off anyway. Gee, I'm glad to see you, Babs. Hey, did Don drive carefully on the way over?

[Mary Livingston]

Well, he drove pretty fast, but he had his arm around me so I wouldn't bounce out.

[Jack Benny]

Oh.

Oh, so that's it.

[Mary Livingston]

Why, Don, From Harris to Benny to Wilson.

[Jack Benny]

Now, wait a minute, Mary. I'm not a bit jealous of Don. He's my friend. Aren't you, Don? Yes, Jack.

[Don Wilson]

And believe me, I acted like a perfect gentleman.

[Jack Benny]

Did he, Barbara?

[Mary Livingston]

Well, he did whisper something in my ear that was kind of cute.

[Jack Benny]

Oh, yeah? What was it, Don?

[Don Wilson]

Well, Jack, I'll admit I did sort of lose my head for a minute.

[Jack Benny]

All right, come on, Don. What did you whisper in Barbara's ear?

[Don Wilson]

Well, I got all excited and I said, roses are red, violets are blue, jello is tempting, and so are you.

[Jack Benny]

Why, Don Wilson, look at those big red blushes on your face. Say, Babs, did you get the Christmas present I sent you?

[Mary Livingston]

Thanks, Jack. They were lovely. But I never wear pink ones.

[Rochester]

Oh, darn it, Barbara. Keep still.

[Jack Benny]

God.

[Rochester]

Oh, boy, Jack is sure some devil.

[Jack Benny]

Stop laughing, Kenny. I bought Barbara a pair of pink gloves.

[Mary Livingston]

I bet they got lace on them.

[Jack Benny]

Have nothing on the kind. Now, come on, everybody. Let's go in the other room and have some refreshment.

[Rochester]

Hey, boss. Boss.

[Jack Benny]

What is it, Rochester?

[Rochester]

There's somebody at the back door, wants to see you.

[Jack Benny]

Oh, yes, I know who it is. Excuse me a minute. Jingle bells, jingle bells Jingle all the way oh, hello, Andy.

[Rochester]

Hiya, Buck.

[Jack Benny]

Not loud. Wait. I close the door. Now, look, Andy, you'll find the Santa Claus suit out there in the garage. And as soon as you're dressed, you climb up on the roof and come down the chimney.

[Rochester]

Well, I better put a beard on so they Won't recognize me.

[Jack Benny]

Yeah, you better put one on your tonsils, too.

Now, here. Here's the bag with all the presents in it.

[Rochester]

Okay. Gee, this is gonna be fun.

[Jack Benny]

Quiet, Andy, quiet. They'll hear you.

[Rochester]

Oh, say, Buck, here's a little Christmas present that Ma sent you. I hope you like it.

[Jack Benny]

Well, that was very sweet of her. What is it, Andy?

[Rochester]

Well, it's a combination salad fork and back scratcher.

[Jack Benny]

Well, say, there's a comb on there, too.

[Rochester]

Now, that's for your hair. Are you.

[Jack Benny]

Wait a minute, Andy. Say, there's a comb on there too.

[Rochester]

That's for your hair as you're going by.

[Jack Benny]

Oh, yeah, but it's too late now.

Now, look, remember, Andy, remember, when you're all dressed up. Lookit, when you're all dressed up, get up on the roof, see? And here's your cue. When you hear me say Sandy Claus will be here in a minute, you come down the chimney.

[Rochester]

Okay. See you later, Buck. I feel like a darn fool.

[Jack Benny]

Quiet, Andy. Jingle bell, jingle bell Jingle all the way dum dum.

Well, here I am again, gang. Hey, I'm sorry, Barbara. I had a little business to attend to.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, that's quite all right. Say, Jack, another telegram just came for you. It's from Clark Gable and Carol Lombard.

[Jack Benny]

Oh. Oh, what does it say?

[Mary Livingston]

It says that we would love to be with you tonight, but we were invited somewhere else in the nick of time.

[Jack Benny]

Well, of all. That's the last time I'll ever invite them. I hope Ginger Rogers doesn't wire me that she can't come.

[Mary Livingston]

She couldn't wait. She telephoned.

[Jack Benny]

No, that's fine. The next time I'll give a party, I'll get a crowd. If I have to change my name to Elsa Maxwell. This is awful.

[Rochester]

Yeah. What are we gonna do with all this food in the kitchen?

[Jack Benny]

I don't know, Rocha, sir.

[Rochester]

Oh, God, I'll be eating so much cranberry sauce, I'll be red in the face.

[Jack Benny]

That's a neat trick if you can do it.

Red in the face.

[Don Wilson]

Say, Jack, isn't Phil Harris coming over tonight?

[Jack Benny]

Phil? Of course he is. And wait till he sees Barbara Whitley here.

[Mary Livingston]

Why, Jack, didn't you tell Phil I had a date with you tonight?

[Jack Benny]

No. Let the wise guy find out for himself. Hey, boys. How about playing a number, fellas?

[Rochester]

And we'll wait.

[Jack Benny]

And we'll dance till dinner is ready.

And leave the punch bowl on the table. You can go back. Come on, Babs, let you and I dance.

[Mary Livingston]

I'm sorry, Jack, I promised the first one to Don.

[Jack Benny]

Oh, I see. Well, Mary, looks like I'm stuck with you.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, no, you're not. I'm stuck with Kenny.

[Jack Benny]

Well, play, boys.

[Rochester]

Hey, Rochester, I don't want to dance. I don't want you to dance. I want you to put down that.

[Jack Benny]

Newspaper and get out of that easy chair. Hit it, boys. Who does Clark Gable think he is any?

[Don Wilson]

Well, thanks, Barbara. I enjoyed that dance very much.

[Mary Livingston]

So did I.

[Jack Benny]

Don't say, Mary. I'm some dancer, ain't I?

[Mary Livingston]

Kenny, you're marvelous. And believe me, I'm kidding.

[Jack Benny]

Thanks, pal.

[Rochester]

Hey, Jack, what are you doing up.

[Jack Benny]

On that ladder again? I want to put these ornaments back on top of the tree. Now, Mary, hold the ladder steady this time, will ya?

There's the door, Rochester.

[Rochester]

Dog gone. Every time that bell rings, you up on the ladder.

[Jack Benny]

Listen, Rochester, you'll be trimming this tree yourself if you weren't colorblind. Mary, hand me up those scissors.

[Rochester]

Well, well. Merry Christmas, Mr. Harris.

[Jack Benny]

Hiya, Rochester. Limu, Gimu and Doug.

[Liberty Mutual Announcer]

Here we have the Limu emu in its natural habitat, helping people customize their car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual. Fascinating. It's accompanied by his natural ally, Doug.

[Jack Benny]

Uh, Limu is that guy with the binoculars watching us?

[Liberty Mutual Announcer]

Cut the camera. They see us.

[Jack Benny]

Only pay for what you need@liberty mutual.com Liberty Liberty Lib Liberty Liberty Savings Ferry unwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance Company and affiliates excludes Massachusetts.

[Apollo Sales Platform Announcer]

Tired of juggling sales tools or spending hours on prospecting just to book a few meetings? Meet Apollo, the go to market platform for finding leads, connecting with buyers and closing deals all in one place. Apollo gives you access to over 210 million contacts and AI that handles all your busy work, finding leads, drafting emails and even prioritizing your day. So stop paying for five different sales tools when one does it all. Visit Apollo I.O. and sign up free today.

[Mary Livingston]

Say, Jack, It's Phil Harris.

[Jack Benny]

Oh, boy. Wait till he sees Barbara here. Merry Christmas, Phil. Same to you, Jackson. Say, Jack, I brought a friend along. Do you mind? No, no. Who is it? Joan Bennett.

[Rochester]

Joan Bennett.

[Jack Benny]

Oh, oh.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh.

[Jack Benny]

Hello, joan.

[Mary Livingston]

Hello, jack.

[Jack Benny]

Oh, my elbow.

[Mary Livingston]

Well, Jack, what are you doing in that ridiculous position?

[Jack Benny]

Who, me?

[Mary Livingston]

It's an encore, but you don't know it.

[Jack Benny]

Help me up, Mary. Well, Joan, I'm awfully glad you dropped in. It was nice of Phil to bring you.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, he and I are old friends. Aren't we, Phil?

[Jack Benny]

You said it, baby. Baby? You know, Joan, every girl he takes out, he calls baby.

[Mary Livingston]

Well, he can't remember all their names.

[Jack Benny]

Half of them you can't even pronounce.

Oh, Joan, you know everybody here, don't you?

[Mary Livingston]

Nearly everybody. Hello, Mary. Hello, Joan. Gee, that's a pretty dress you've got on. Thanks. You really like it? No, but it's Christmas.

[Jack Benny]

Mary. Oh, Joan, I don't think you've met Ms. Whitney. This is Barbara Whitney, my latest.

[Mary Livingston]

Well, how do you do, Ms. Bennett? How do you do? She's a little young for you, isn't she, Jack?

[Jack Benny]

Well.

That'S me. Get em young, treat them rough and buy them nothing.

You know, Joan, Phil is so witty at times.

[Rochester]

Hey, Ms. Bennett. Ms. Bennett.

[Mary Livingston]

Yes, Kenny? Here I am under the mistletoe.

I'll be over five years.

[Jack Benny]

Very good, Joan. Five years. Gosh, I'll be out of the mood by then. Look, what's in a mood? Well, boys and girls, I hope you're all hungry. We're going to have a swell turkey. Don't tell me you went for a turkey. Yes, I did, Phil. We're going to have a marvelous dinner. Everything from soup to nuts. How much is it a plate? I'll just ignore that. Oh, Rochester, how's the turkey coming along? We're getting hungry.

[Rochester]

Well, it'll take time. Boss, that's a pretty tough bird. Tough bird?

[Jack Benny]

He's been in the oven over three hours.

[Rochester]

I know, but every time I light the gas, he blows it out.

[Jack Benny]

Well, I'll be darned. Now you go out in the kitchen and rush that turkey along.

[Rochester]

Okay. Man, that's the foulest, foul I ever saw.

[Jack Benny]

I'm sorry, Joan, but you know, Rochester exaggerates. So the dinner is really lovely.

[Mary Livingston]

Well, to tell the truth, Jack, I'm not hungry. Oh, well, there's an unusual blonde.

[Jack Benny]

Quiet, Mary. Well, folks, let's have some of these hors d' oeuvres here till dinner is ready, huh?

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, Jack, Rochester made a mistake.

[Jack Benny]

What's the matter?

[Mary Livingston]

There's only seven of us here and he brought in eight olives.

[Jack Benny]

Well, Joan can have two. He. It's good to see you again, Joan. Gosh, I haven't seen you since we finished making Artists and Models Abroad. We sure had a lot of fun in that picture, didn't we?

[Mary Livingston]

Yes, we did, Jack. It's playing around now. Have you seen it, Joan?

[Jack Benny]

You promise you won't tell anybody?

[Mary Livingston]

I promise.

[Jack Benny]

I saw it 12 times.

[Mary Livingston]

12 times?

[Jack Benny]

Yeah.

[Mary Livingston]

You know your part, Jeff.

[Jack Benny]

A little trouble, didn't I? But say, Joan, no kidding, when I looked up at the screen and I saw you in my Arms. See? It. It seemed just like a dream.

[Mary Livingston]

You mean that scene where we were sitting on the park bench in the moonlight eating popcorn?

[Jack Benny]

Yeah. Wasn't it marvelous?

[Mary Livingston]

Well, I didn't think there was enough butter on us.

[Jack Benny]

I'm talking.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh.

[Jack Benny]

You know, Joan, the two of us work so smoothly together. How would you like to make another picture with me sometime?

[Mary Livingston]

Well, Jack, I don't know. I couldn't really say right now. Send him a telegram. Everybody else does.

[Jack Benny]

Mary. Oh, say, Joan, I almost forgot. Come on out here in the hall a minute. I got a surprise for you.

[Mary Livingston]

What is it?

[Jack Benny]

Oh, come on. Come on with me. You'll find out. Excuse us a minute, will you, fellas? Hey, Jack, what's the idea? Never mind. Come on, Joe.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, all right. Don't pull me.

[Jack Benny]

Oh, I'm sorry.

Well, here we are.

[Mary Livingston]

Where?

[Jack Benny]

Right under the mistletoe. You know what that means, don't you?

[Mary Livingston]

No, what does it mean?

[Jack Benny]

Well, it means this.

[Rochester]

Yippee.

Wow.

[Mary Livingston]

Hooray.

[Jack Benny]

Wasn't that swell, huh? Now, let's go back and Joan act nonchalant.

[Mary Livingston]

All right. Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the.

[Jack Benny]

Way Dum dum dum dum dum dum dum. That's the idea.

[Rochester]

Hey, Jack, what are we gonna eat?

[Jack Benny]

All right. Pretty soon, fellas. Pretty soon. Now look, everybody, before we go into dinner, I want you all to sit around the fireplace and get your presents. Santy Claus is coming down the chimney. Santa Claus. Now sit around the fireplace, everybody.

Now put out the lights, Mary.

[Rochester]

Okay.

[Jack Benny]

J Because Sandy Claus will be down here in a minute.

[Rochester]

Because Sandy Claus.

[Jack Benny]

Will be down here in a minute.

[Rochester]

Because Sandy Claus.

[Mary Livingston]

Oh, stop that clowning, Jack.

[Rochester]

I'm not clowning, Sandy Claus. Are you deaf? Deaf nothing. I'm stuck in the chimney. Oh, my goodness. What do we do now? Let's eat. That's it. Come on, fellas.

[Jack Benny]

See you.

[Don Wilson]

This is the busiest season of all the year, and you mothers know it better than anyone else. Well, here's one swell way to save time and trouble and keep your family happy.

Get acquainted with the delicious new Jello puddings and serve them all well, they're quick and easy to prepare and the whole family will enjoy them. Jello butterscotch pudding, rich with old fashioned butterscotch flavor. Jello vanilla pudding, creamy, delicate and smooth. And Jello chocolate pudding, rich and chocolatey and tempting. All three can be made in next to no time. For they require only just a few minutes cooking and you get delicious pudding, the real homemade kind that's just mouth watering. Good so for easy, inexpensive and delicious desserts, try the new Jello puddings. Butterscotch, vanilla, chocolate.

[Jack Benny]

Good night, folks, and Merry Christmas.

[Don Wilson]

Kenny Baker appears on the Jello program through service of Mervyn leroy Productions. This is the National Broadcasting Company.

[Jack Benny]

And Doug.

[Liberty Mutual Announcer]

Here we have the Limu Emu in its natural habitat, helping people customize their car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual. Fascinating. It's accompanied by his natural ally, Doug.

[Jack Benny]

Limu is that guy with the binoculars watching us.

[Liberty Mutual Announcer]

Cut the camera. They see us.

[Jack Benny]

Only pay for what you need@libertymutual. Dot liberty.

[Chorus Singer]

Liberty. Liberty.

[Jack Benny]

Liberty Savings. Very unwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance Company and affiliates. Excludes Massachusetts.

[Apollo Sales Platform Announcer]

Tired of juggling sales tools or spending hours on prospecting just to book a few meetings? Meet Apollo, the go to market platform for finding leads, connecting with buyers and closing deals all in one place. Apollo gives you access to over 210 million contacts and AI that handles all your busy work finding leads, drafting emails and even prioritizing your day. So stop paying for five different sales tools when one does it all. Visit Apollo I.O. and sign up free today.