
Pat Novak for Hire 49-03-06 (04) Fleet Lady
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Pat Novak
Ladies and gentlemen, the American Broadcasting Company brings to its entire network one of radio's most unusual programs.
Jack Webb
Pat Novak for hire.
Pat Novak
Sure, I'm Pat Novak for hire. That's what the sign out in front of my office says. Pat Novak for hire. You gotta put it in block letters. Because down on the waterfront in San Francisco, there's a price tag on everything. You gotta do that or marry a rich widow. I don't like to work that hard, so I rent boats and do anything else that's cash and carry. Oh, it's all right if you don't mind trouble, because that's one thing you can't duck. It's like trying to dance the minuet in skis. And the best trouble always looks good from the outside. You're all smiles and you feel like a kid opening a hand grenade under the Christmas tree. I found that out Tuesday night. It was around 7 o' clock and I was getting ready to close the office when this little guy showed up. It was about the size of a golf bag with arms. If he had a cigar box, he could see over a pool table. He walked up to the desk and started talking in a voice that made you think he was trying to put Lily Pons out of work. Hello.
Jackie Greg
You Novak?
Pat Novak
You're doing all right so far. What's on your mind?
Jackie Greg
I'm Jackie Greg. You heard of me, huh?
Pat Novak
You're the shy type. I know.
Jackie Greg
I'm Jackie Greg, the jockey. You heard of me, huh?
Pat Novak
All right, now. I heard her. You put the show on the road.
Jackie Greg
I'm looking for a horse. You want to find me a horse?
Pat Novak
Yeah. I breed him in the back room. What color you want?
Jackie Greg
You're so tough, I gotta take that from you?
Pat Novak
Calm down before you wind up in a boys choir. If you got anything to sell, put it on the line or beat it.
Jackie Greg
I'm riding a horse tomorrow called Fleet Lady. She's disappeared.
Pat Novak
She's not here.
Jackie Greg
I'm supposed to ride the sixth race with her tomorrow. The Banana's a handicap and she's gone.
Pat Novak
All right, she's gone. Maybe your horse likes to go out at night. I haven't seen her. Get to the point.
Jackie Greg
I'll give you 200 bucks to find that horse. Somebody took her in a van. I trailed him down here at the waterfront.
Pat Novak
But you lost him up at the Ferry Building.
Jackie Greg
That's right. Something funny's going on. My mount disappeared and you gotta find her.
Pat Novak
This is a big waterfront. And where's the 200 bucks?
Jackie Greg
You'll get that, all right. Found by Pier 19. They turned in. You think you can find Fleet Lady?
Pat Novak
I don't know. Who owns her?
Jackie Greg
Woman named Sybil Thornton. She's mixed up, I think.
Pat Novak
Yeah? Why steal your own horse?
Jackie Greg
I know. Run and ring him, maybe.
Pat Novak
That's a tough trick.
Jackie Greg
This woman's got some good ones. You want that 200 bucks?
Pat Novak
Yeah. How are the odds?
Jackie Greg
What's the difference? You gonna open a book? You better take the 200 bucks now.
Pat Novak
Yeah, the dough will keep. You sound frightened, Junior.
Jackie Greg
And you sound nosy. Here's a 200. I want you to find the horse. You let me know at the Kingston Hotel, huh?
Pat Novak
Sure.
Jackie Greg
If you don't find anything around the waterfront, maybe you better try the track. Ask around there.
Pat Novak
Yeah. By the way, how do you fit in? How come you got $200 interest in that horse?
Jackie Greg
Maybe I love horses. What do you care if maybe I love horses?
Pat Novak
I don't. A guy like you've got to love something. Oh, it was a real sweet proposition. A jockey in search of a horse. There was something phony about the whole thing. I had the 200 bucks, but I didn't feel good. It was like a guy stealing a murder gun to help out on a scrap metal drive. Well, after the little guy left, I closed the office and started to hit the docks. But it didn't work out. You can buy good whiskey these days. So you feel funny walking up to some guy on the pier and asking, have you seen a racehorse around here, mister? By nine, I was sure that horse wasn't around. So I borrowed a car and drove out to the track. I found out where Sybil Thornton's horses were quartered and headed down that way. It was pretty dark, so when I bumped into her, all I got was a vague outline. She had a good looking vague outline.
Sybil Thornton
I'm very sorry.
Pat Novak
Yeah, I'm full of regrets, too. Should we try it again?
Sybil Thornton
Aren't you a little mixed up in your animals? They keep horses here.
Pat Novak
You don't seem to mind.
Sybil Thornton
No. You lean nicely, but you'd probably feel safer with a platform.
Pat Novak
We'll try this again when I've had three good meals. That's a horse.
Sybil Thornton
Yes, I know. In fact, I own her.
Pat Novak
I see. That'd make you Sybil Thornton.
Sybil Thornton
Yes. What would that make you?
Pat Novak
A guy named Pat Novak looking for your horse. I was hired in the waterfront to find her.
Sybil Thornton
Why? They grow big on the waterfront. You must get a lot of sun. By the way, is Fleet lady missing your jockey?
Pat Novak
Say she is. That's why I'm snooping around.
Sybil Thornton
Does know he had any friends?
Pat Novak
He's got a checkbook. How about Fleet Lady? Is she tucked in bed? Yeah. Let's take a look.
Sybil Thornton
You'd find it very dull, Mr. Novak.
Pat Novak
Yeah, that's what they said to Anthony. Let's see the horse, huh?
Sybil Thornton
Suit yourself. She's down this way.
Pat Novak
Okay.
Sybil Thornton
I'm doing this out of the bigness of my heart. I think you're wasting my generosity, Mr. Novy.
Pat Novak
Don't use it all this trip.
Sybil Thornton
It's from in the stable. Come on.
Pat Novak
All right.
Sybil Thornton
Down about here. Fleet Ladies call here. There's a flashlight on the wall.
Pat Novak
Okay.
Sybil Thornton
Poor thing.
Pat Novak
Your horses die broke, too. Who is it? Fleet Lady.
Sybil Thornton
Yes? Are you satisfied?
Pat Novak
No. I'm gonna ring up headquarters.
Sybil Thornton
Are you crazy?
Pat Novak
Then I'm gonna call Jackie Greg and tell him his hunch paid off.
Sybil Thornton
I wouldn't do that, Mr. Novak.
Pat Novak
Stop kidding me, sweetheart. She didn't get killed in a fight with another horse. Greg figured somebody was telling a machine. That's why Fleet Lady's dead. That's why I'm gonna call headquarters.
Sybil Thornton
Suit yourself. But remember what happened, lady.
Pat Novak
You getting tough, angel? No.
Sybil Thornton
You just wouldn't look good with a saddle, Mr. Novak.
Pat Novak
I watched her as she turned and walked out of there. Was the kind Of a walk that makes you flip the calendar and find out how far away spring is. I looked around a while, but it didn't do any good. The place was full of doors. So whoever killed Fleet lady got out easy. Like a roomer at a church picnic. I closed the door and went down the line to call headquarters. As I stood in there talking, I saw Sybil Thornton drive by. It was a long convertible with red asbestos seat covers. After I called headquarters, I went back and waited near the stable. About a half hour later a police car pulled up. And when I saw who got out, I began to get unhappy. Like a three legged man in a ballet school. It was Hellman from Homicide and he had a squad with him.
Inspector Hellman
All right, I'll talk to him. I'll talk to him. Hello, Novak. Where's your trainer?
Pat Novak
Your boys get paid to laugh at you, Hellman. I don't.
Inspector Hellman
Yeah, where's the horse?
Pat Novak
What are you doing on the case?
Inspector Hellman
I came for the ride. You mind, Novak?
Pat Novak
No, I just wondered if they wised up downtown because you could find a dead horse. Horse? Hellman. If they staked it out in the middle of Market street, you'd find it before long.
Inspector Hellman
I'll try this time. Where is it?
Pat Novak
Stall 18. Over there.
Inspector Hellman
Yeah. Keep an eye on him, boys. I'll be back in a minute.
Pat Novak
In here, Novak. Yeah, the one with the teeth like yours.
Jack Webb
You better shut up, Novak.
Pat Novak
Don't get jumpy. You haven't seen the horse.
Jack Webb
Just shut.
Richard Karn
Hi, I'm Richard Karn and you may have seen me on TV talking about the world's number one expandable garden hose. Well, the brand new pocket hose Copperhead with pocket pivot is here and it's a total game changer. Old fashioned hoses get kinks and creases at the spigot, but the Copperhead's pocket pivot swivels 360 degrees for full water flow and freedom to water with ease all around your home. When you're all done, this rust proof anti burst hose shrinks back down to pocket size for effortless handling and tidy storage. Plus your super light and ultra durable pocket hose Copperhead is backed with a 10 year warranty. What could be better than that? I'll tell you what. An exciting radio exclusive offer just for you for a limited time. You can get a free pocket Pivot and their 10 pattern sprayer with the purchase of any size Copperhead hose. Just text water to 64,000. That's water to 64,000 for your two free gifts with purchase. W A T E R to 64,000 by texting. 64,000. You agree to receive recurring automated marketing messages from Pocket Hose. Message and data rates may apply. No purchase required. Terms apply. Available at pockethose.com terms.
Jocko Madigan
Nearly 90% of kids who vape say flavors are why they do it. A lot of the flavors that I've heard are like peach, mango, watermelon. It makes it seem like more childlike and innocent. Oh, I tried this once. It won't be that much of a problem. But then eventually it becomes a problem. It's time to restrict the sale of flavored tobacco products in Oregon and protect our kids from nicotine addiction. Urge lawmakers to Pass Senate Bill 702A. Take action at flavorshookoreegoids.org paid for by the Campaign for Tobacco Free Kids Action Fund.
Pat Novak
Wasn't going to be much of a conversation anyway.
Inspector Hellman
What color horse was that, Novak?
Pat Novak
What do you mean? Take a look?
Inspector Hellman
Yeah, I did. I just took a look. It's a smart horse. Novak, huh? That's right. That dead horse in there is wearing a double breasted suit.
Pat Novak
Hellman got the message straight. I walked in and took a look. Jackie Gregg was lying there on the floor as dead as last year's love. The sickness didn't show until we rolled him over on his stomach. Somebody'd gone duck hunting in the middle of his back. I began to feel a little sick myself and was ready to send out for the same gun when Hellman started to talk.
Inspector Hellman
You forgot to mention the guy when you phoned headquarters.
Pat Novak
He wasn't there. I was in here before and the guy wasn't around.
Inspector Hellman
What was he doing out of the horse?
Pat Novak
I don't know. Hellman maybe crawled out of a crack. I don't know. There were two shots. I came in and found the horse.
Ronnie Stark
Yeah?
Pat Novak
Check the horse.
Inspector Hellman
You're trying to tell me the horse shot back? Who is he?
Pat Novak
A guy by the name of Jackie Gray. He gave me 200 bucks to find a missing horse. Yeah, A horse called Fleet lady running into Mara's Handicap. This is the end of the line.
Inspector Hellman
How do you know it's the same one?
Pat Novak
I don't. Maybe you gotta be a horse to tell. Why don't you ask one of your boys? Yeah, your boy's real tough. Call him off, Hellman.
Inspector Hellman
He's nasty. We all hate him. Novak.
Pat Novak
It's all right. I'll put it on your bill. Hellman.
Inspector Hellman
That's good. You can write it up at headquarters.
Pat Novak
Hellman, you ought to run an idiot. The heavy thinking's too much for you.
Inspector Hellman
I can piece this together. We come out here and find a dead man with you kicking up dust 40ft away.
Pat Novak
Look, Hellman, I didn't kill the guy and then call up headquarters. I know they're bad in Homicide, but I'm not that big hearted.
Inspector Hellman
We got a spare hook for you, Novak. That's where you stay until somebody gets you off.
Pat Novak
You can start out with civil. Thornton.
Inspector Hellman
Another horse.
Pat Novak
She's got the speed for it. Look her up. She owns Fleet lady and she was dashing around here in the dark playing easy to get.
Inspector Hellman
I'll look her up.
Pat Novak
You better leave the boys behind. After all, she's only a woman. When you see her, ask about that van down on the waterfront. And ask what she was doing before I made that phone call.
Inspector Hellman
I'll tag all the bases. Don't worry, Junior. And if things fit together, you'll both be in the jug. I'll see you later. I got work to do.
Pat Novak
Yeah, it's getting late. You better put the boys back in the cage. I began to worry after Hellman left. There was no murder gun and he didn't have too much to go on. But no one else wanted my job. I knew the girl was gonna have an alibi. And I was the last guy that Jackie Greg had seen. I had about as much chance as a fat girl at a Princeton prom. Hellman didn't like me, and he was a smart cop with a disposition like a ton of rhubarb. I had to start right from scratch. I felt like Adam the first morning he woke up. So I looked up a guy named Jocko Madigan. An ex doctor and a boozer who'll give you a lift if you show him where the stirrups are. Oh, a good guy, but he thinks all food makes a gurgle. I hit all the bars and finally found him up at Maggie Nielsen's apartment. She's a good looking voice that lives up on the hill. And Jocko was working his way into her liquor supply.
Ronnie Stark
Hello, Patsy. You're just in time to join me for my first drink of the evening. Or one of my first, at least. Yeah, I see Maggie's not here, but I found a whiskey. It was in plain sight, locked in the closet under some newspapers.
Pat Novak
All right, Jocko. When are you gonna sober up?
Ronnie Stark
I plan to do it briefly on April 1, when the rest of the world plays the fool. Also, I'm in trouble, Jocko.
Pat Novak
You gotta help me.
Ronnie Stark
Good. I've got a special bottle I used to forget your troubles Stop caressing that.
Pat Novak
Jug and listen to me. I'm in a jam, Patsy.
Ronnie Stark
There's nothing in nature so sad as a half empty bottle. It's like a broken vow or an unfulfilled promise in the skies. A falling star. Almost.
Pat Novak
All right, Joto.
Ronnie Stark
A falling star. And you shrug it off, never realizing that a whole world has ended at that moment. A hundred million dreams, maybe. And you watch it fall and make an asinine wish. And that's all the good it does is start a fall. It gives some kid a chance to wish for a bicycle.
Pat Novak
You finished now, Jocko?
Ronnie Stark
Yes. What kind of trouble? Anything I could aggravate.
Pat Novak
I'm mixed up out at the track. A guy by the name of Jackie Greg is dead and I don't look good.
Ronnie Stark
Hellman?
Pat Novak
Yeah. The guy's a jockey and he hired me to find a horse named Fleet Lady.
Ronnie Stark
Did you?
Pat Novak
The horse and the jockey ran a dead heat. But there's something funny about the whole deal.
Ronnie Stark
Did you talk to the jockey?
Pat Novak
Not enough.
Ronnie Stark
Patsy, you've got to break yourself of the habit of waiting until people are dead before you think of a question.
Pat Novak
Jocko, I want you to hit all the horse rooms. Find out what you can about the sixth race tomorrow. It's the Bonanza Handicap. And hurry up, will you?
Ronnie Stark
If it's the sixth race, why can't we wait a while?
Pat Novak
Start now. Get everything you can and call me. I'll leave a message at your place.
Ronnie Stark
Where are you going?
Pat Novak
I don't know. Maybe up to see the girl.
Ronnie Stark
Oh, Patsy, you're going to be waving at the hangman's wife when they spring the trap door.
Pat Novak
I gotta see her. She owns Fleet Lady.
Ronnie Stark
Why don't I see her?
Pat Novak
She's got a stake somewhere. I got a lot of questions. What could you do? Up there?
Ronnie Stark
Yes. If it weren't an academic question, I'd argue the point.
Pat Novak
Looked like a bum deal right from the start.
Ronnie Stark
Oh, Patsy, you have the instinct for recognizing trouble, but not the intelligence to duck it.
Pat Novak
Jocko, will you get out to those horse parlors? I need facts, not fables. Now give me a hand.
Ronnie Stark
All right. Give my love to Fleet Lady.
Pat Novak
Her name's Sybil Thornton.
Ronnie Stark
Well, I'll bet I'm not far wrong. Good night, lover.
Pat Novak
After I left Jocko, I went to the Chronicle morgue and looked up Paul Stangle. We pulled out the clips on Sybil Thornton. They were nice and fat because she'd been to Reno four times and hadn't broke training for years. She'd been traded around More than a Red Sox pitcher. The clippings said that she was 32. There were a lot of pictures, and from her eyes we got the idea she was around 35. But there were arguments the other way, too. There weren't any stories on her for the last few months, just a few items from the columns. They all said the same thing. She was hitting the night spots with a gambler named Rudy Hauser. There were pictures of him, too. He would have looked real good in a cave with heavy curtains. I asked Paul. He said Howser had a gambling place out on Geary. So I took a cab out there for 10 bucks. The guy at the door said Sybil Thorne had left the place an hour ago. That made me feel good. When Hauser opened the door to his office, I lost the glow.
Jack Webb
Yeah? What's with you?
Pat Novak
I got a problem.
Jack Webb
You got the wrong door.
Pat Novak
You can't get any tougher, so I'm coming in.
Jack Webb
Suit yourself. I never throw anybody out until I'm sure they've lost all their money. What's on your mind?
Pat Novak
A horse named Fleet lady. She disappeared at 7:00 tonight.
Jack Webb
Hey, you check under the rug. I'll try the cabin.
Pat Novak
She got back just in time to greet somebody's gunsell.
Jack Webb
If I say no, will you go out and lose your money like a good boy?
Pat Novak
Fleet lady was owned by a gal named Sybil Thornton. The columns say you're number five on her list.
Jack Webb
And they never lie. The whiskey's too good.
Pat Novak
Also a little bird say she was in your office an hour ago.
Jack Webb
That's right. She said your name's Novak. The next time you get a bombshell, give it a test run.
Pat Novak
With Flea lady dead, your money's gonna look good in the sixth tomorrow.
Jack Webb
What makes you think that gal would throw a race?
Pat Novak
For the same reason she goes out with you, huh? When a gal takes a Great Dane like you out in public, it generally means the guy's a bucks ahead of her.
Jack Webb
You want to fight the team now, Novak? Just remember, sometimes you can't be right in the gentleman, too.
Pat Novak
Yeah? I hope that's the way you feel when they pick you up for Jackie Greg's murder, huh? Oh, you do a real nice double take, mister. The jockey checked out with a horse.
Jack Webb
I didn't know that, Novak.
Pat Novak
Yeah? With no brains, you built this gambling club.
Jack Webb
I didn't know that he was dead. I told you that, Novak, and I meant it was all right for a little punk. I'm sorry it's dead.
Pat Novak
So is he. I'll See you later, Hauser. I gotta nose around and find out where you were tonight.
Jack Webb
Yeah, you seem all right, Novak. So I'll tell you if you got any dough left.
Richard Karn
Hi, I'm Richard Karn and you may have seen me on TV talking about the world's number one expandable garden hose. Well, the brand new pocket hose Copperhead with pocket Pivot is here and it's a total game changer. Old fashioned hoses get kinks and creases at the spigot, but the Copperhead's pocket pivot swivels 360 degrees for full water flow and freedom to water with ease all around your home. When you're all done, this rust proof anti burst hose shrinks back down to pocket size for effortless handling and tidy storage. Plus your super light and ultra durable pocket hose Copperhead is backed with a 10 year warranty. What could be better than that? I'll tell you what an exciting radio exclusive offer just for you for a limited time. You can get a free pocket pivot and their 10 pattern sprayer with the purchase of any size Copperhead hose. Just text water to 64,000. That's water to 64,000 for your two free gifts with purchase W A T E R to 64,000. By texting 64,000, you agree to receive recurring automated marketing messages from Pocket host. Message and data rates may apply. No purchase required. Terms apply. Available at pockethose.com Terms Use of flavor.
Jocko Madigan
Tobacco by teens is a crisis. Tobacco companies use flavors like cotton candy, watermelon ice and cool mint to hook kids like me. They seem harmless, but they aren't. Addiction to nicotine sets us up for a lifetime of health problems. Oregon legislators can do something about it. Passing Senate Bill 702A will keep flavored tobacco away from kids. But there are just a few short weeks left for lawmakers to act. Take action to protect kids like me@ flavorshookoregonkids.org paid for by the Campaign for Tobacco Free Kids Action Fund.
Jack Webb
When you leave my table, it's better than a horse named Fleet lady in the sixth race tomorrow.
Pat Novak
Do you always bet on a dead horse?
Jack Webb
You got the tip. Use it or bury it. But don't loan it out.
Pat Novak
Oh, the case was a regular grab bag. When I walked out of Hauser's office, I began to tick off the things that didn't add up. First on the list was that van down on the waterfront. If it was Fleet lady who got shot in the stable, if it was the ringer, that meant Fleet lady had Run tomorrow. I couldn't figure out why Hauser was so sure she'd win. An idea kept racing around in the back of my mind like an ant in a cookie factory. Jackie Greg lied about that van down on the waterfront. But why? Not to bail me out of the poor house with 200 bucks. I got part of the answer when I stopped with a pay telephone and called Hellman.
Inspector Hellman
Yeah, Hellman talking.
Pat Novak
This is Novak. I got some news.
Inspector Hellman
You'll have to put it on the back page.
Pat Novak
What do you got?
Inspector Hellman
Your friend Jackie Greg had some love life.
Pat Novak
Well, there's a chance for you, Hellman. Who's the girl? Sybil Thornton.
Inspector Hellman
Yeah, we found a picture in his wallet. The gooey kind.
Pat Novak
I'll bet you stole it for long train rides. What time did he die?
Inspector Hellman
The right fit for you. Between nine and ten o' clock. Two shots from a.32 caliber pistol.
Pat Novak
How about the horse.45 caliber. Two people. It's getting involved.
Inspector Hellman
Maybe, maybe not. You got two hands, Novak.
Pat Novak
Look up a guy named Rudy Hauser. He's got a joint out on Gary Street.
Inspector Hellman
I got enough friends. You look them up.
Pat Novak
I did. He's still talking about Fleet lady and Demar's race.
Inspector Hellman
All right, maybe he's sentimental. Look, Novak, I'll pick out my own work. I don't need free help from you. Jackie Greg paid 200 bucks and look what he got.
Pat Novak
Suit yourself. But Rudy Hauser and that gal are close friends. Yeah, like two part harmony in a telephone booth. Now, get off the dime, Hellman. Howser's got that gal in his hip pocket. She owns Fleet lady and he's betting her to win.
Inspector Hellman
You're trying hard, Novak.
Pat Novak
It's gotta be a slow field to lose to a dead horse. Wake up, Hellman. You couldn't smell a rat in a basement full of cheese.
Inspector Hellman
I did all right in your apartment, huh? That.32 caliber pistol. We found it up at your place. See you later.
Pat Novak
Well, I wasn't too worried about that. Hellman's smart enough to know a phony plant. I began to think about that.32 caliber pistol. It's a woman's weapon. Well, that doesn't prove anything. So's a bread knife if she's in a bad mood. Must have been about midnight when I got to Sybil Thornton's place. She was wearing black lounging pajamas tied tight around a slim waist. She looked like a wasp with a nice sting when she had company.
Sybil Thornton
Come in. Mr. Novak?
Pat Novak
Yeah?
Sybil Thornton
Mr. Novak, this is Ronnie Stark.
Inspector Hellman
Hello, Novak. Well, he's not very Friendly, Sybil.
Sybil Thornton
He's just pouting because they're going to arrest him for Jackie's murder.
Pat Novak
How do you like Hellman?
Sybil Thornton
You've known him longer.
Pat Novak
Yeah. Somebody left the murder gun up at my place. Where you been all night?
Sybil Thornton
Please, Mr. Novak, you're embarrassing Ronnie.
Inspector Hellman
That's right. I'm blushing. And it's not the whiskey, Novak.
Sybil Thornton
I see you must stay longer, Ronnie.
Inspector Hellman
She's persuasive on no egg. I'll see you tomorrow.
Sybil Thornton
You won't forget, Ronnie?
Inspector Hellman
Oh, I won't forget. Oh, I'm betting on you, Novak.
Pat Novak
What won't he forget, Mr. Novak?
Sybil Thornton
I hope nobody ever asks you that question.
Pat Novak
You don't want to talk about putting that gun in my apartment.
Sybil Thornton
No.
Pat Novak
Let's talk about Rudy Hauser, then. Your meat grinder friend. We just had a good talk and he opened up a new road.
Sybil Thornton
What'd you tell him?
Pat Novak
Don't break a spring. He's all right.
Sybil Thornton
Will you do me a favor, Patsy?
Pat Novak
Like not talking to Hauser anymore, huh?
Sybil Thornton
That's right. Won't do you any good, Patsy, and it'll do me a lot of good.
Pat Novak
How's he gonna know which horse got killed? I'll bet you lied to him, Angel.
Sybil Thornton
It's my applecot, Patsy. Leave it alone.
Pat Novak
Sure, but play your hand right, baby, because I'm gonna watch your cards. And if you got one that says Jackie Gregg, I'm gonna call you the hard way too.
Sybil Thornton
Patsy, you're a nice beast. I really think you would. Sit down.
Pat Novak
Yeah.
Sybil Thornton
Drink?
Pat Novak
No.
Sybil Thornton
Do you good.
Pat Novak
Not right now.
Sybil Thornton
Well, you've read the book.
Pat Novak
Just a couple of chapters.
Sybil Thornton
Bet they're the right ones.
Pat Novak
You better watch out, baby. I may be a long shot.
Sybil Thornton
Well, you care as long as I bet I don't.
Pat Novak
That's good.
Sybil Thornton
I didn't think you'd mind.
Pat Novak
All right, angel, it's time to wire.
Sybil Thornton
The folks used to know that. Just wait til you know me better.
Pat Novak
That's from me. I left the number.
Sybil Thornton
It's your fault.
Pat Novak
Yeah? Hello, Patsy. What'd you find out, Jocko?
Ronnie Stark
Not much. Nobody seems to care about the six race.
Pat Novak
I care about it.
Ronnie Stark
That's because you killed one of the jockeys. The rest of the people have a more casual interest.
Pat Novak
How do the odds run?
Ronnie Stark
No heavy favorites. Vin Air and Sleepy Time Gal. Figured to be the best at around 5 to 1.
Pat Novak
What about fleet Lady?
Ronnie Stark
Down the line somewhere. I talked to one fellow. He says she's a dog and couldn't beat a paralytic goose over a hundred yards.
Pat Novak
Yeah, what else?
Ronnie Stark
Oh, that's all.
Pat Novak
What do you mean, that's all? Start digging. Jocko. We're not getting any place.
Ronnie Stark
Not even at your end, huh? I counted on you to do better than that. Right, lover?
Pat Novak
On the way home, I bought the morning papers. There was a story on Jackie Greg. No details. Most of the story was a statement by Hellman on Hellman. There was no mention of Flea Lady. And at one o' clock in the morning there was nothing I could do but roll into bed. I woke up about nine and called Jocko. It was like sending a message out to the Farallones by Indian Runner. He just muttered and said he'd meet me out at the track. I had to have some more dope, so I called Ira Snow. He calls the races and bets on him. The way he does it, a horse is a real beast of burden. He was playing elf when I got him on the wire. Yeah, Ira, this is Novak. What do you know about the Bonanza Handicap? It's a horse race. Oh, you're funny. What about the field? Are the horses any good? For hamburgers, maybe. Nothing else. How about Fleet Lady?
Ronnie Stark
Eastern track?
Pat Novak
Nobody knows. Would she be worth a heavy plunge?
Ronnie Stark
If you want to be a monk. What's this all about?
Pat Novak
Trouble. How about a fix? Could they run in a ringer on Fleet Lady? It's been done before, but it ain't easy. That's what I figured. How's Rudy Howser on horses?
Ronnie Stark
He ain't.
Pat Novak
He got burned a long time ago. He never bets. I think you're wrong. Look, Novak, I know every guy in.
Ronnie Stark
Town that's got the itch. Rudy Howser?
Pat Novak
No. You know a guy named Ronnie Stark? Sure. Runs a book.
Richard Karn
Why?
Pat Novak
Nothing. I may see you at the track. I'm gonna make a bet.
Ronnie Stark
Yeah, I'll tell the horses.
Pat Novak
Well, that left me in a hole. If Ira was right, Rudy Hauser on Fleet lady didn't make a bit of sense. I got a to the track about 2:30. Jocko was there and Hellman was wandering around up in the grandstand where they couldn't push him into a starting gate. Sybil Thornton waved from her box as I moved over to get a better shot at the starting line for the sixth. They were almost at the post when Jocko came back from the betting window.
Ronnie Stark
Well, Patsy, I bet $2 on a horse called Scotch Victory. It seemed like a good omen. Yeah, I saw your friend Rudy Houser at the window. He was pouring money down on the favorites to win.
Pat Novak
That's why the odds have Gone down on Vin Air and Sleepy Time Gal. Look at that board.
Ronnie Stark
Yes, Fleet Lady's gone all the way up to 12 to 1.
Pat Novak
Yeah, from 8 to 1 all the way up.
Ronnie Stark
Maybe the word got around. She's dead.
Pat Novak
No, that's the funny part. She's down there. Number three on the rail, see? Not a peep out of anybody. They.
Ronnie Stark
Hot Weather is going to the.
Pat Novak
Front by one length. Sleepy Time Gal by a head. Fleet lady between horses, is running third by one length. On the outside, it's Been Air and All Soldier by two lengths. Going into the clubhouse turn, it's Hot Weather by two lengths. Sleepy Time Gal by a half length. Fleet lady is moving up on the outside. It's Finnair 4th.
Ronnie Stark
Fleet lady runs well for a ghost. Yeah, Rudy, how's it? Better hurry or he won't see much, huh? You better hurry. He left the track 10 minutes ago.
Pat Novak
Are you sure, Jocko?
Ronnie Stark
Yes. I heard him tell someone he had to make a phone call just before the betting closed.
Pat Novak
Well, Jocko, you're a sweetheart.
Ronnie Stark
I like.
Pat Novak
Let's go to the stable.
Ronnie Stark
Well, the race isn't over.
Pat Novak
It was over five minutes ago.
Ronnie Stark
How about my $2?
Pat Novak
Come on, will you? There's only one person won't try to fix a horse race. That's a horse. I knew there was going to be trouble fast. The horses were just coming under the wire when I waved to Hellman and started for the stable. When we got there, Sybil Thornton was clearing out like a fire sale.
Sybil Thornton
I'm in a hurry, Patsy, darling, let me box.
Pat Novak
Oh, you mean a bad play. Angel. Stick around. Let me buy, Patsy.
Inspector Hellman
You heard him, lady. Stick around.
Jack Webb
Thanks, Copper. I'll take charge.
Pat Novak
That's a big gun. How's it?
Jack Webb
I got up big deep. You let me drop a hundred grand.
Sybil Thornton
Sick was your idea, Rudy.
Jack Webb
Not this way. You let me drop a hundred grand because you ran Fleet Lady.
Sybil Thornton
Program said Fleet lady and that's who ran.
Jack Webb
I brought those odds into line at the window. My other 80 looked bad on Fleet Lady. You didn't stay to watch a trail afield.
Sybil Thornton
All right, I didn't stay. You lost your hundred grand. You killed the ringer. You were a smart big shot. Who was going to sew up the race.
Jack Webb
The ram, Fleet lady and cost me a hundred grand. All right, copper, move away from her. Over this way, Sybil.
Sybil Thornton
No, don't let him do it, Patsy.
Pat Novak
I want to see how tough you are.
Jack Webb
Come on, Civil. Let Shoe and me move over against the stall.
Pat Novak
Watch out, Howser. You're backing into the horse.
Inspector Hellman
Grab the horse.
Pat Novak
No, back.
Inspector Hellman
He's going to trample him.
Pat Novak
You grab him. It's your idea.
Sybil Thornton
Is he dead?
Pat Novak
Yeah. Should have learned the first time you can't beat the horses.
Inspector Hellman
That's a bum joke, Novak.
Pat Novak
I guess it is.
Inspector Hellman
Now that we're all here, who do we book for Jackie Greg's murder? I'll answer that.
Pat Novak
1.
Jack Webb
Friend.
Inspector Hellman
Who's this guy?
Pat Novak
One. You missed, Hellman. Hello, Stark.
Inspector Hellman
I ain't no Wagner. What are you waiting for, Sybil? Tell the man you killed Jackie Greg.
Sybil Thornton
I've had enough trouble today, Ronnie.
Inspector Hellman
You got more coming. You figured it out yet, Novak?
Pat Novak
Hauser dumped his 80 grand on you.
Inspector Hellman
That's right. It's a lot of spending money.
Sybil Thornton
Wait a minute, Ronnie. I don't like this.
Inspector Hellman
You'll get your half, baby. I'm gonna write out an iou. And when they book you for murder and the vote's in, you can't use it.
Sybil Thornton
Who wouldn't do a thing like that, Rummy?
Inspector Hellman
A dead girl can't spend 40 grand. She killed your guy, Copper, and tried to palm it off on Novak. I was there, so I'll testify.
Sybil Thornton
Ronnie, you're a no good guy.
Inspector Hellman
Don't be silly. I love justice. A booker for murder, Copper. I want to tear up that iou.
Pat Novak
Well, Hellman finally worked it out. Started out as a fixed race, and when they were all through, it was up to the horse Rudy. Hauser put the squeeze on Sybil for some dough. She offered to run a fast ringer in place of Flea lady so Hauser could pick up a bag full of Rudy. Just wanted to make sure. So he sent one of his boys around to knock off Fleet Lady. Only the guy killed the ringer instead. It was a break for Sybil. She made a deal with a bookie named Ronnie Stark to take all of Hauser's bets. And guaranteed him that Fleet lady couldn't win because she wasn't that good a horse. It panned out that way. She let Hauser think Fleet lady was dead. He spent 20 grand at the window, pushing up the odds on Fleet lady. And dumped another 80 on her to win a moving van. It was a phony story Greg used to get me to scare Sybil. He wanted in on the deal. He went back to the stable that night, got in a beef. She killed him. She had him out in her car. When I went to make that phone call. She figured it was a good way to pass the buck. Well, Hellman asked only one question. Why would a nice, tame horse go crazy and trample a man to death. Jocko had the answer. The horse that killed Hauser was a filly.
Jack Webb
The Armed Forces Radio Service has just brought you Pat Novak for Hire, starring Jack Webb. Pat Novak is produced by William P. Russo. Jocko Madigan is played by Tudor Owen. Inspector Hellman is played by Raymond Burr. Music was composed and conducted by Basil Adnum. Be with us again next week when.
Pat Novak
Over most of these same stations, we'll.
Jack Webb
Bring you hat Novak for Hire. Novak for Hire was previously released by abc, the American Broadcasting Company, for listeners in the United States and rebroadcast for our men and women overseas. This is the United States Armed Forces Radio Service, the voice of information and education.
Pat Novak
Sam SA.
Jocko Madigan
Use of flavored tobacco by teens is a crisis. Tobacco companies use flavors like cotton candy, watermelon ice and cool mint to hook kids like me. They seem harmless, but they are. Addiction to nicotine sets us up for a lifetime of health problems. Organ legislators can do something about it. Passing Senate Bill 702A will keep flavored tobacco go away from kids. But there are just a few short weeks left for lawmakers to act. Take action to protect kids like me@ flavorshookorgonkids.org paid for by the Campaign for Tobacco Free Kids Action Fund. We interrupt this program to bring you an important Wayfair message. Wayfair's got style tips for every home. This is Nicole Byer helping you make those rooms flyer. Today's style tip when it comes to making a statement, treat bold patterns like neutrals. Go wild like an untamed animal.
Richard Karn
Print area rug under a rustic farmhouse table.
Jocko Madigan
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Pat Novak
Com.
Inspector Hellman
Ooh beers.
Pat Novak
This has been your Wayfair style tip.
Inspector Hellman
To keep those interiors superior.
Pat Novak
Wayfair Every style, every home.
Episode: Pat Novak for Hire 49-03-06 (04) Fleet Lady
Release Date: June 11, 2025
In this thrilling episode of Pat Novak for Hire, listeners are transported to the gritty waterfront of San Francisco, where private investigator Pat Novak navigates a complex case involving a missing racehorse and a jockey’s untimely death. The narrative weaves suspense, intrigue, and classic noir elements, capturing the essence of the Golden Age of Radio.
[01:02] Pat Novak:
Pat Novak is closing up his modest office when a distressed jockey, Jackie Greg, approaches him with an urgent request. Greg, portrayed with nervous energy by [Speaker Not Identified], pleads for Novak's help to locate his missing horse, Fleet Lady, who disappeared just before an important race.
Notable Quote:
Jackie Greg (01:39): "I'm looking for a horse. You want to find me a horse?"
Pat Novak (03:17): "I'll give you 200 bucks to find that horse."
Timestamp: [03:17]
Novak begins his investigation by canvassing the waterfront area, encountering various characters and gathering conflicting information. He discovers that Sybil Thornton, the owner of Fleet Lady, might be entangled in the disappearance. His interaction with Sybil introduces a femme fatale element, adding depth to the unfolding mystery.
Notable Quote:
Pat Novak (05:05): "She had a good looking vague outline."
Timestamp: [05:05]
Sybil Thornton (06:02): "Yes, I know. In fact, I own her."
Timestamp: [06:02]
As Novak delves deeper, he learns that Jackie Greg has been found dead, raising the stakes of his investigation. Inspector Hellman of Homicide steps into the scene, creating tension between law enforcement and Novak's private detective work. The plot thickens with the revelation that Fleet Lady may have been part of a larger scheme involving race-fixing and deceit.
Notable Quote:
Inspector Hellman (08:30): "All right, I'll talk to him. I'll talk to him."
Timestamp: [08:30]
Pat Novak (11:01): "Hellman got the message straight."
Timestamp: [11:01]
Novak's investigation leads him to uncover connections between Sybil Thornton, Rudy Hauser (a gambler), and the suspicious circumstances surrounding Fleet Lady's disappearance. Through interactions with characters like Jocko Madigan and visits to various establishments, Novak pieces together the web of deceit and betrayal that underpins the case.
Notable Quote:
Pat Novak (14:02): "I'm in a jam, Patsy."
Timestamp: [14:02]
Ronnie Stark (14:07): "There's nothing in nature so sad as a half empty bottle."
Timestamp: [14:07]
On the day of the Bonanza Handicap, tensions reach their peak. Fleet Lady's unexpected performance at the race draws Novak closer to the truth. Simultaneously, Inspector Hellman becomes more suspicious of Novak's involvement, leading to a confrontation that exposes the intricate plot involving fixed races, stolen horses, and double-crossing gamblers.
Notable Quote:
Pat Novak (28:00): "From 8 to 1 all the way up."
Timestamp: [28:00]
Ronnie Stark (28:46): "Fleet lady runs well for a ghost."
Timestamp: [28:46]
In the aftermath of the race, Inspector Hellman pieces together the puzzle. The revelation that Fleet Lady was a ringer used to manipulate race outcomes brings the true culprits to light. Sybil Thornton's involvement and the death of Jackie Greg are clarified, providing closure to the intricate case and highlighting Novak's resilience and detective prowess.
Notable Quote:
Pat Novak (31:59): "Well, Hellman finally worked it out. Started out as a fixed race..."
Timestamp: [31:59]
Sybil Thornton (31:30): "I've had enough trouble today, Ronnie."
Timestamp: [31:30]
Notable Quote:
Inspector Hellman (22:00): "I did all right in your apartment, huh? That .32 caliber pistol."
Timestamp: [22:00]
The episode is masterfully produced by William P. Russo, with music composed and conducted by Basil Adnum, enhancing the suspenseful and immersive atmosphere. The voice acting, particularly by Raymond Burr as Inspector Hellman, brings authenticity and depth to the classic radio drama format.
Pat Novak for Hire delivers a captivating episode that embodies the charm and suspense of old-time radio mysteries. With its intricate plot, memorable characters, and engaging dialogue, this installment invites both longtime fans and new listeners to enjoy a timeless detective story set against the backdrop of San Francisco's waterfront.
This comprehensive summary encapsulates the intricate plot and dynamic character interactions of the Fleet Lady episode, providing a vivid portrayal for those who have yet to experience this classic radio drama.