
Sherlock Holmes - 32-05-19 (069) The Final Problem
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Mr. Bell
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Sherlock Holmes
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Sherlock Holmes
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Mr. Bell
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Sherlock Holmes
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Mr. Bell
Every week at this time, the makers of G. Washington's coffee bring you a story from the Sherlock Holmes series of mystery dramas. This week's adventure is an adaptation of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's story entitled the Final Problem. Remember as you listen to it that G. Washington solves your daily coffee problem just as surely as Holmes solves his famous mystery. At the end of the program, we have a brief announcement about Dr. Watson and his friend Sherlock Holmes. Please listen for it. And that opening paragraph, as always, leads us to Dr. Watson's comfortable, hospitable study.
Dr. Watson
Where there's a blazing fire and a steaming cup of G. Washington coffee to welcome you.
Sherlock Holmes
Here it is.
Dr. Watson
Mr. Bell made it. You came up the steps.
Mr. Bell
Thank you, Dr. Watson. You know, a good cup of coffee always seems to me to be the very essence of hospitality.
Dr. Watson
You name me a better coffee than G. Washington's, Mr. Bell. Go ahead, name me one.
Mr. Bell
Ah, but. Cheers.
Dr. Watson
Gee.
Mr. Bell
Washington's isn't just another brand of coffee. It's really entirely different. It not only has a perfect flavor, but it's the easiest coffee to fix. Just a teaspoonful in the cup, add hot water. Incidentally, you never make more than you're going to use, so that makes it economical too. Right, Mr. Bell?
Dr. Watson
Now I suppose I begin my story.
Mr. Bell
Fine. What's it to be this time?
Dr. Watson
How about another tussle between Holmes and Professor Moriarty?
Mr. Bell
Excellent. Always give me plenty of first class shudders to meet that individual.
Dr. Watson
Well, tonight's story deals with Holmes efforts to break up one of his most unpleasant schemes. Racket, you call it today.
Mr. Bell
And did he succeed?
Dr. Watson
Oh, now, Mr. Bell, that's putting the cart before the horse. The affair began with a series of curious disappearances from St. Anthony's Hospital.
Mr. Bell
What disappeared, Dr. Watson? People or things.
Dr. Watson
They were corpses or perhaps I should say cadavers. Now, before I go any farther, perhaps I should explain that St. Anthony's is a medical school and hospital combined. I myself took My course in anatomy and dissection inside its venerable walls. Sir Lionel Greatlake, the head of the staff, was an old friend of mine. We cursed our internship in the same hospital. To make a long story short, I received a frantic communication from Sir Lionel begging me to persuade Holmes to come straight to the hospital. I remember that night perfectly at the particularly nasty pea souper had settled down over London. Literally feeling our way we crept along the embankment till we sensed rather than saw the gray walls of St. Anthony's looming up. Listen to those folks. I do. Hog horns always have to sound so ruinful.
Sherlock Holmes
Well Watson, you would insist on coming tonight?
Dr. Watson
Should be somewhere along here. Oh, here it is. I stumbled over the doorstep. Where is that infernal bell?
Sherlock Holmes
Pull.
Dr. Watson
Oh, and here we are. I hope the night watchman hasn't gone off in his rounds.
Sherlock Holmes
No, no, someone's opening the door.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Matthew Watson. The parlax can't see very clearly.
Dr. Watson
No, it's me right enough. Leo. I brought Sherlock Holmes along with me.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Oh, thank heavens. Come in, come in.
Sherlock Holmes
Ah.
Dr. Watson
This is my old friend Lionel Greatly.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
That is honored and I may say grateful and relieved. This is the sixth theft inside of a month, Mr. Holmes. It's got the place in an uproar. Nurse is having hysterics, Patience insists on going home.
Sherlock Holmes
I take it you are alluding to the cadavers which have been stolen recently.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Yes, Mr. Holmes. You know how jealous a hospital is of its reputation. At least little breath of scandal.
Dr. Watson
Oh cheer up Leo. Maybe it's just a prank of one of the lads. You know what medical students are.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
That's what I thought when we found the first body missing four weeks ago. But now that five have been stolen. Oh no, that's carrying a joke too far. They tried to get away with another this evening.
Sherlock Holmes
Really?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
I just happened to drop into the dissecting room and trying to stop it. The minute I opened the door I knew someone was in there. But he slipped out the side way before I could light the gas. But come and see for yourself. Follow me. The laboratory is in this way.
Dr. Watson
Oh, mausoleum lecture. Really a Leo. Remember when we used to sneak a forbidden snake smoke behind that broom closet?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
I wish to heaven life were as simple nowadays. It faces like a beehive buzzing with suspicion. No wonder we've been able to keep it out of the paper.
Sherlock Holmes
Here we are.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
One second till I unlock the door. That's it. Now just let me turn up the gas. Well, there we are.
Sherlock Holmes
Quite impressive. I see you have all the latest improvements. That gentleman in the corner I take it he was the object of tonight's attempted abduction?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Yes, Mr. Holmes, that's the corpse. Splendid bezel and do face a bit.
Sherlock Holmes
The worse for wear. Otherwise a splendid body.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Yes, if we're most anxious not to.
Sherlock Holmes
Lose him, he must be fairly recent. I see there have been no injections of the preserving fluid.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Quite right, Mr. Holmes. He died only this afternoon.
Sherlock Holmes
And the other stolen bodies, they have been duly preserved I suppose?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Well no, now that you mention it, they were all stolen before being treated.
Sherlock Holmes
Curious eh, Watson?
Dr. Watson
What?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
I don't know.
Dr. Watson
I suppose if you're going to be a body snatcher you may as well take fresh ones.
Sherlock Holmes
You'll pardon me if I rummage around a bit, Sir Lionel. Of course, of course, yes, I can carry on my interrogations and my investigations at the same time. Okay there. My lens needs politics. Now then, male or female?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
What?
Sherlock Holmes
The stolen bodies with a male or female?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Oh, male, all of them, you understand.
Sherlock Holmes
Interesting ain't Watson?
Dr. Watson
You mean you think the thief's a woman hater?
Sherlock Holmes
I wouldn't go so far as I am. What age are they? Missing quarters.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Quite a whole. Middling I should say. Remarkably good lot of bodies though. No marked effects. I mean I hear the lad's been.
Sherlock Holmes
Careless about cleaning his instruments.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Oh that'll be Potter. Had some girl on his mind. Can't wait to get washed off and away.
Sherlock Holmes
I see. And you found this specimen out here after the thief was scared off. And I take it the cadavers aren't usually left lying about?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Certainly not. They're kept in that long steel cabinet over there. Can't be too careful you know. Have to be rats in a building as old as this.
Sherlock Holmes
I'm here. How many people have keys to that cabinet, Sir Lionel?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Only Dr. Lacey. You may know him by reputation, Mr. Holmes. Hugo Lacey. He's our head surgeon and has charge of the classes in this evening.
Dr. Watson
Of course.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Brilliant. Swallow.
Dr. Watson
I say Leo, how's he coming along with his extra experiments in transplanting tissue?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Can't say. Carries on most of his experiments in a little laboratory. He's fixed up in his own lodgings and never lets anything out till it's perfect. One of the cleverest surgeons in the country, Mr. Holmes. Magnificent touch. I could wish however that he was a better professor.
Sherlock Holmes
No good at teaching, eh?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
No, it isn't that, it's his temper. He can be devilish nasty. And let him catch one of the lads with an instrument bent out of place. It's a phobia with him, Mr. Holmes. A place for everything and Everything in its place, I trust Young Potter sets his things to write before Lazy sees them.
Sherlock Holmes
Oh, this is the door through which the thief escaped, I take it?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Yes, and I bolted it on the inside, as you can see.
Sherlock Holmes
Well, that's that. I think I've seen all there is to see.
Dr. Watson
Found anything Harm?
Sherlock Holmes
Yes. Yes, there is what you might call an overabundance of clues. Too many to permit of any intelligent deductions.
Dr. Watson
What do you mean?
Sherlock Holmes
Well, 14 sets of fingerprints for instance. And in the dust under that operating table alone I found shreds of five different types of tobacco.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
You haven't played. Mrs. Perhaps is getting careless again. Oh, she's the cleaning woman, Mr. Holmes. Dr. Lacey is always complaining that she is inefficient. Well, Mr. Holmes, if you finished your investigation, perhaps you can advise us how we should act in this matter.
Sherlock Holmes
Now before I do that, suppose we come to an understanding. Would you be satisfied merely to stop the theft? Or do you want to know who is responsible for the missing corpses?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
We must find out everything, Mr. Holmes. Who and what and how and why. A mystery of any kind is most immoralizing for a hospital.
Sherlock Holmes
In that case we should do nothing further. We shall do nothing further tonight.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
But aren't you going to set a watch on his?
Sherlock Holmes
The criminal wouldn't show up. You may take my word for Lionel. The man who has been stealing your cadavers is thoroughly acquainted with the workings of this hospital.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Look here, Mr. Holmes, if. If we don't set a guard on this room, he may steal this body too.
Sherlock Holmes
I sincerely hope so.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Well, no use making things too easy for him. At least we can put the body back in the canopy.
Sherlock Holmes
Unfortunately that won't be possible. We can't open it. The cabinet has a spring lock. The thief slammed it after him.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Oh dear, dear. What will Lacey say when he finds this corpse out here in the morning?
Sherlock Holmes
I don't think there's much danger of that, Sir Lionel.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Really Mr. Holmes, I am disappointed. I must say I hoped you would be more helpful.
Sherlock Holmes
Well, there's one thing we can do for you before we leave, eh Watson?
Dr. Watson
No, what?
Sherlock Holmes
Well, we can make up for Mrs. Clutch's deficiencies if you'll get us a couple of old rags to. Lionel. I think Watson and I can go over this room in no time.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Home?
Dr. Watson
Have you gone out of your mind?
Sherlock Holmes
Not at all, my dear Watson, not at all. It's most important that everything should be neat and tidy. Well. Oh, that's a nice brick today. Wind seems to have dissipated all the fog.
Dr. Watson
What's the idea of rousing a chap out of his nice warm bed in the streets feel deserted. Depressing if you ask me.
Sherlock Holmes
The important thing, my dear Watson, is in setting a trap is to collect your catch before anyone else does. No, here's the no one knows. Deliono seems to be having a bit of an argument with someone on the step.
Mrs. Clutch
And I'll not be put off the schedule by any two of any sexes. You see, I'm going home now to 6:00 and at his breakfast. But I'll be back and when I do I'm going to clean that.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
No.
Sherlock Holmes
But Mrs.
Mrs. Clutch
Clutch, I assure you how fine one you are to be put in charge. Everyone knows routine is what keeps an obstacle running.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Oh, what. Mr. Holmes. I didn't see you come in.
Mrs. Clutch
Watson. Ethan, he's coming to you. I'd like to know out of me.
Sherlock Holmes
Wave you but here. I beg your pardon.
Mrs. Clutch
I am not to be put off my schedule. I say tell you that my. So what I.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Yes, that. That was Mrs.
Sherlock Holmes
Clutch.
Dr. Watson
I gallant bit of a term against, eh Neil? Red hair, Fairly blazes.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Come in, come in. Sorry to give you such a stormy welcome, but I. I just caught Mrs. Clutch about to clean up the laboratory. I suppose you want to take another.
Sherlock Holmes
Look at the place. If it's convenient.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Yes, of course, of course. Follow me.
Sherlock Holmes
I wonder why the sudden burst of energy on Mrs. Cutpar.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Dr. Lacy may have been putting the screws on. They get along like cat and dog, those two.
Sherlock Holmes
But didn't I just hear her say that she was going home to fix him his breakfast? Yes.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
You see, Dr. Lacy is Mrs. Cut's car not a.
Sherlock Holmes
But surely if they get on each other's nerves as they seem to.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Yes, it is a bit difficult to understand, I admit. But I suppose Lacy hesitates to move. He's. He's really very comfortable. He's built in a lot of improvements. Covers and things of that sort. And I've told you how he is and place for everything and everything in its place. Moreover, Mrs. Crutch is a first class cook and Lacy, he's a good feeder.
Dr. Watson
However, Lacy. I wouldn't push the old girl too far. I'd be afraid of finding poison in my coffee some bright morning.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Well, here's your laboratory, Mr. Holmes. Doctor. You gentlemen looks about the same as it did last night.
Sherlock Holmes
I shall be able to judge better after I've gone over the place with my microscope.
Dr. Watson
But you said yourself there were two many fingerprints and things.
Sherlock Holmes
Why do you suppose I insisted on those Rags. Last miner.
Dr. Watson
Oh, of course, I see now, we were rubbing out those prints.
Sherlock Holmes
Marvelous, my dear. What's marvelous? The old brain is actually functioning this early in the morning. Now, now let's see what we bag Here. Here. Here's the sweeping stroke of a moth. The very mop that has been standing in this corner here. Here? Yes, yes, here. The imprint of a heavy hand on the edge of the. This table. Note the unusual walls on the left hand, middle finger, like a question mark.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Those must be Mrs. Cuts's fingerprint. She was just about to start dusting the table when I caught her.
Sherlock Holmes
Yeah, the prints on the mop and on the table are identical. Well, well, well, that seems to be all the evidence against Mrs. Clutch.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
I got her out as quickly as I could.
Dr. Watson
Holmes. I say, Holmes, the corpse, it's gone.
Sherlock Holmes
I wonder how soon you'll notice that the corpse has been stolen. But what did you expect?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Sorry to contradict you, Mr. Holmes, but the corpse has been put back in the cabin. Yes, matter of fact it slipped my mind. I should have mentioned it sooner. Seems Dr. Lacy dropped in late last night and insisted on putting the cadaver back in the cabinet. Nothing the night watchman could say would dissuade him. I told you about his mania for order last night, Mr. Holmes.
Sherlock Holmes
Ah, these are doubtless his fingerprints. Then here on the lock and around this channel of the cabinet. Ah, yes, typical surgeon's hands. Long, sensitive fingers, but strong tips. Slightly specialist.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Yes, that's lazy right enough.
Dr. Watson
But Holmes, aren't you going to look inside the cabinet?
Sherlock Holmes
Well, I suppose we might as well, if Sir Lionel can provide us with the key.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Certainly, certainly. At least he left his with the night watch. From here we are.
Dr. Watson
By Jove, the corpse is missing.
Sherlock Holmes
Yes, I gathered it might be. Well now, now let us see if we can find anything further in the room itself. Ah, here we are. Here we are. Strings, the third set of fingers. Yes, yes, yes. He came in here earlier than Lacy and those the fingerprints of the door. Now, first this individual, then lacy, and finally Mrs. Clutch, all nicely superimposed one over the other.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Say, Holmes, this is fascinating. Almost as exciting as a scientific experiment.
Sherlock Holmes
Yes, yes. This third individual and not any true sic. Aha. Here, here. He stumbled and had to put his hand out to brace himself. There's a nice print here on the wall. Seeing he moves over to this jar of alcohol, he removes the COVID then he puts it back again. And here, here he staggers out.
Dr. Watson
You mean he was intoxicated? Beautifully, Beautifully, yes, but I don't Understand? Why in thunder did he come poking around here in the middle of the night?
Sherlock Holmes
Watson, have you no recollection of your own green salad days? Didn't you ever sneak a bit of laboratories alcohol to help out a celebration that had suddenly gone dry?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
One of the students any idea which one is the whole?
Sherlock Holmes
Well, I think I can make a guess. But I don't intend to. The boy isn't mixed up in this body snatching. The corpse was here when he left. His prints are under laces on the doorknobs.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
What is it, Potter? Oh, I. I just thought I'd slip in and pull a my instruments before those petticoats get. I beg a pardon, sir? Before doctor gets to look at them. I'll come back later.
Sherlock Holmes
Not all at all. Come right in, come right in. We're just leaving Mr. Holmes.
Dr. Watson
We haven't discovered anything.
Sherlock Holmes
What we have. What we have. We know for sure that either Lacy or Mrs. Clutch is involved in this business. Possibly both. Yes, yes I am. I suggest we go to pay the Clutch menage a visit.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Well, I'll be glad to take you over myself. You look a bit pegged this morning. I'm all right, sir. Littleish, that's all. Well, don't let it get you down. Come along, Watson.
Sherlock Holmes
Oh, Miss Butter.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Yes sir.
Sherlock Holmes
They tell me tomato juice is an excellent antidote for raw alcohol.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
That's Mrs. Cuts's place over there. The house with the white shutter.
Dr. Watson
Look at that crowd of people standing gawking out in front. I say, looks like something's happened.
Sherlock Holmes
Yes, yes. There's my favorite watchdog of the law, Inspector Lerad of Cotton Yard standing in the doorway looking important. Oh, hello. Hello Lestrade. What's up?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Eh, Plenty. Woman by the name of Clutch has just murdered her lodger, Dr. Lay.
Dr. Watson
I told you she'd do it Sunday.
Sherlock Holmes
Any unusual details?
Dr. Watson
No.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Open and shut case. First she stabs him with a kitchen knife. Then she throws the body closing all.
Sherlock Holmes
Into a vat of nitric acid.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
This lo was keeping in his dressing room.
Sherlock Holmes
Indeed. Any objections if I come in and take a look around?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
All right. But I tell you this case is open and shut. But come in, come in. Body's in first room, head of the stairs. It's not nice but if you want.
Sherlock Holmes
To look, go ahead.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
I got to stay here.
Sherlock Holmes
Oh, thanks, thanks.
Dr. Watson
What a viol chemical smell. Plus something else.
Sherlock Holmes
No, that'll be the acid. Look out, look out. There's a dark holy spirit.
Dr. Watson
You hear that noise? Like something bubbling and prying.
Sherlock Holmes
Yes, yes, that's the acid working on the body.
Dr. Watson
Of course. That smell is acid and fat dissolving.
Sherlock Holmes
Cracking. Must be the room. Oh, morning, Jennifer. Jenkins. Good morning. That's why I sent you here to guard the body, eh?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Yes, sir.
Dr. Watson
This air.
Sherlock Holmes
Oh, Jacobs. Jenkins, I think you might open another window, get a draft through here.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Yes, sir.
Sherlock Holmes
Now, Watson, if you bring me that jug labeled olive oil, you may as well stop the action of this acid, right? Yes, I pour it right into the tub. Mrs. Stroud said the remains are not exactly attractive. I wonder, Sir Lionel, if you could bring yourself to identify Dr. Lacey.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Certainly, Mr. Holmes. I'm a medical man. I'm quite used to. Yes, yes, she's rather horrible. Tastes almost entirely eaten away. With the dark hair, what is left of it. And the clothes. And that ring. He never could get it off his little finger. Yes, yes, I think we may safely say that it's lacy.
Sherlock Holmes
Portable Jack. And how was he killed?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Kitchen knife on the table there, Mrs. Klutz. Fingerprints. Plain as day.
Sherlock Holmes
So Lestrade's been persuaded the value of fingerprints, eh? Dear, dear, dear. The world does progress. Yes, yes, yes, these are Mrs. Quest. Prince.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
All right?
Mrs. Clutch
I didn't kill him. He was dead when I come in.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
He was dead.
Sherlock Holmes
Okay, down to your lip and get going. Just a moment. I'd like to ask this. This lady a few questions.
Mrs. Clutch
He was dead when I found him. Is it likely? I'd have called in the police if I did.
Sherlock Holmes
I. Oh, you call in the police?
Dr. Watson
Well, that she did.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Leaning out the window, screaming. Screaming bloody murder.
Sherlock Holmes
Any idea who could have killed Dr. Lacey, Mrs. Quest?
Mrs. Clutch
No, sir. I came to be known all night on account of my sister's having a baby. I went straight from Hercules to the hospital.
Sherlock Holmes
We had any chance to check up on that lance.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Oh, that's straight enough. But she'd been home at least 20 minutes before she called the police. Time to murder half a dozen doctors.
Sherlock Holmes
I didn't do the thing, you know, Lestrade, it's just possible that Mrs. Klutz may be right. You see, it would take several hours for Esther to dissolve the corpse. As far as this.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
What, all of it? Her fingerprints are on the knife. That's enough for me. Hers and no one else.
Mrs. Clutch
And why shouldn't me fingerprints be on that knife? It's me own kitchen knife, ain't it?
Sherlock Holmes
Well, that knife, I suppose you look at it again. Now what? Emblazer.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Good.
Sherlock Holmes
Notice the order of the fingerprints. For instance. Thumb and forefinger near the blade, end of the handle. Now suppose. Suppose you take this pocket Knife of mine and. And pretend to stab me with it, obviously. Just a lot of it.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
All right.
Sherlock Holmes
There now, you see. Notice the way you hold it. Thumb against the outer end, little finger next to the blade. In other words, the grip for using a knife for kitchen work and for stabbing are exactly reversed. Dr. Lacey was not stabbed with this knife at all. It was put here by someone to incriminate Mrs. Clutch. Yes, but if she didn't do it, who did? Someone who wanted to get rid of her. You any idea who that could have been, Mrs. Clutch?
Mrs. Clutch
No, sir, that I haven't. The only person mean enough to do a thing like this was that son of a gun legacy. And he said, now, Lord rest. Oh, dear me. It's not bad enough having a murder in me own out and then losing me best love. Yeah, but the police have to go accusing me on top of it all. But if not, I'll never get another tenant of these rooms.
Sherlock Holmes
All that is so much Froth, my dear Mrs. Tut, compared to the real danger you're in.
Mrs. Clutch
What's that?
Sherlock Holmes
The murderer. He's still at large and he isn't exactly fond of you. I think I'll just drop him from time to time to make sure you haven't been murdered in your bed.
Dr. Watson
Think Mrs. Crutch is in danger?
Sherlock Holmes
Obviously. What's not if you come on it. Why didn't she answer the bell if anything's happening? Oh, here. Here she comes.
Mrs. Clutch
Oh, good afternoon, gentlemen. Please just step inside. I'd have come to the door sooner, but I was upstairs cleaning out after lady's suite. Would you believe it? I've got a tennis.
Sherlock Holmes
No say. No say. Well, does he know its history?
Mrs. Clutch
Yes, I bet he does. But he says he's not superstitious.
Sherlock Holmes
How fortunate. What's he like?
Mrs. Clutch
Well, he's a German professor or something. Come here to carry on some experimenting with Dr. Lacey. Dr. Lacey told me he was expecting him only last week. And so when he come asking for Lacey this morning and I told him what had happened right away, yak of Dr. Lacey's notes and instruments were still here. And when I said yes, he said he'd move right in and carry on with ladies, he left off. Would you mind coming upstairs while I finish my work?
Sherlock Holmes
Well, either way, Mrs. West. Either way.
Mrs. Clutch
He's a nice looking man too. Blonde, with a beard. He limps a little. Oh, it'll be a relief. I tell you, after that lately he was getting queerer and queerer. Going out at all hours of the night. I declare, I Was on the verge of telling the police to keep an eye on him more than once. Well, here we are. Just you set on the sofa. Now what in the name of.
Sherlock Holmes
Well, from what I can see out the window, I should say that your new lodger has arrived.
Mrs. Clutch
Thanks Preserv. Excuse me gentlemen. When I let him in.
Dr. Watson
Holmes any. We better be going.
Sherlock Holmes
In a moment, Watson. In a moment. Plenty of time.
Mrs. Clutch
This way please. Look up and attend the stairs. Oh my, ain't it hot? Oh, Mr. Mister. This is hell. Glad.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Professor Glader, how you doing?
Dr. Watson
Delighted. Sorry I'd come all this way and then find a friend dead.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
He is no friend. He is what you call a colleague. Mrs.
Sherlock Holmes
Clips, the poor mantle on the bed, please.
Dr. Watson
Well, I know Mrs. To make you comfortable. I trust you have better luck than Dr. Come Wesson.
Sherlock Holmes
Come, come, we must be going. You see, Professor D. We were the. The detectives on this case. Don't you have found nothing? I'm afraid nothing. These are my notes on the case. I'm really rather ashamed of them. Would you mind if I. If I burn them here in your fireplace?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Oh, not at all.
Sherlock Holmes
Thank you, thank you. Oh dear me, dear me. I don't seem to have a match.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
One moment, I'll get you some here in the drawer of this table.
Sherlock Holmes
Ah, here you are. A nice little box. Thank you, Dr. Letty. I thought you would know where to find them. A place for everything and everything in its place. Yes, I was sure you would be drawn back to these rooms.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Me? You think I am Dr. Lacey?
Sherlock Holmes
He is dead.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Murdered.
Sherlock Holmes
No, that wasn't Dr. Lacey in that tub of acid. It was one of the bodies he had stolen from St. Anthony. Now, a rather curious confirmation of the bones of the right foot. I've seen it the night before, so of course I recognized it. Your misfortune, Dr. Lacey.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Not his foot, sir. But it's all this rubbish.
Sherlock Holmes
Well, you see, it came to my attention not long ago that Professor Moriarty was getting in touch with quite a number of heavily insured businessmen. One after another these men died. But by and by the insurance companies became suspicious. I was told to investigate. I discovered that on several occasions Professor Moriarty had called on Dr. Lacey. Dr. Lacey who was experimenting with facial surgery. Dr. Lacey who had access to any number of corpses from St Anthony's and in time I began to suspect that Dr. Lacey was working on these dead bodies and transportation. So they would look like the gentlemen who wish to collect their insurance. Professor Moriarty made a handsome profit, I believe. Unfortunately, though, I. I couldn't prove my theory.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
It is crazy.
Mr. Bell
No one would believe it.
Sherlock Holmes
Oh, so I found. Ah, then what good does it do, you, Honor? Just this. When you're in prison, the whole scheme will fall to the ground. I am not Dr. Lisa. You have no proof There you are wrong, sir. This little matchbox which you just handed me contains all the proof that I need. On it is a set of fingerprints which is identical with some on the cabinet door in the laboratory of St. Anthony's and those fingerprints are known to be Dr. Lacey's home.
Dr. Watson
Is magnificent. Phenomenal.
Sherlock Holmes
Elemental, my dear. Once.
Dr. Watson
That'S the end of the story, Mr. Bell.
Mr. Bell
Dr. Watson, didn't the man ever confess?
Dr. Watson
He did better than that. He offered to show up Moriarty, but when they came to take down his testimony, he was found dead on his prison cot. Obviously more of Moriarty's work.
Mr. Bell
There's one thing I don't understand. Why didn't he take the same way out as the businessman? Surely he could have doctored some corpse up so it looked like himself.
Dr. Watson
He could have, Mr. Bell, but that's where human nature comes in. He hated Mrs. So he wanted to implicate her. It was his big mistake.
Mr. Bell
Well, that certainly is a fascinating story, Dr. Watson. Now. Now to get back to something where there are never any mistakes.
Dr. Watson
I know what you're hinting at now. Not a cup of G. Washington coffee.
Mr. Bell
Yes, indeed, Dr. Watson. Have you ever stopped to consider how much the word economy has come to mean to Americans during the last couple of years?
Dr. Watson
Come to mean more to me, too. Had to save on a lot of things I never thought about before.
Mr. Bell
How do you do it, Dr. Watson? Does it mean giving up all the good things in life and using cheaper quality?
Dr. Watson
Not at all, Mr. Bell. I still keep to the good things. If I'm a little more careful how I use them. More satisfaction in being a little careful with good things, you know, than in putting up with poor quality. Oh, by the way.
Mr. Bell
What is it, Dr. Watson? You're chuckling over something now, and it's only fair to tell what it is.
Dr. Watson
Well, a lot of people have been taking a lesson from Sherlock Holmes, Mr. Bell. They. They've been drawing deductions.
Mr. Bell
About what?
Dr. Watson
About my book of Sherlock Holmes stories, Mr. Bell. They've been observant enough to notice the little number one on the back of the volume, and they want to know if they're. If they're going to be other books with more stories in them later on.
Mr. Bell
I'm afraid I'm not very observant, Dr. Watson. I never noticed that little one. And are there going to be more stories?
Dr. Watson
I can't tell for sure, Mr. Bell. I've been talking it over with Mr. Washington. Just in case.
Sherlock Holmes
Case There are.
Dr. Watson
I want everybody to get volume one right away so they won't be left when the first edition runs out. And be unable to make up their complete set.
Mr. Bell
That's right too. We'll have to warn them about that. Especially with that economy we were talking about. It's worthwhile getting a really good book for nothing.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
What about G. Washington?
Mr. Bell
Is that economy?
Dr. Watson
Of course it is. You know a Sherlock Holmes story about the rich old mustard manufacturer, aren't you?
Mr. Bell
I know, Dr. Watson. I can't say that I do.
Dr. Watson
What a good story applies to saving money on coffee too. It seems. A smart young man who thought he was smart anyway asked the mustard king if he really made all his money out of the little bit of mustard people use on their food.
Mr. Bell
And what did he say?
Dr. Watson
He didn't know that he made most of it out of a mustard people leave on their plates. That's just the way it is with coffee. Or ordinary coffee.
Mr. Bell
You mean the real expense is not what you drink but what you waste?
Sir Lionel Greatlake
Exactly.
Dr. Watson
And that's where G. Washington saved. There's no way you only make what you want unless you can have all you want.
Mr. Bell
Well, that sounds like economy. All right, ladies and gentlemen, Dr. Watson and I want you to test G. Washington economy. Get a 4 ounce can right away. Don't be afraid of the size of the can or the price. G. Washington is economical because it ends waste. And as a special inducement, why, Dr. Watson will give you one of his books of seven Sherlock Holmes stories. Just print your name and address on the back of a Label from your 4 ounce can and send it to Morristown, New Jersey. You will receive without cost a handsome deluxe book with a gold profile of Holmes on the COVID and A picture of Dr. Watson at the front of seat. In that way you'll have the satisfaction of proving to yourself that G. Washington's won't wreck your family budget. And of getting a handsome book of Sherlock Holmes stories for nothing. Please note down the address, Morristown, N.J. and send in that four ounce can label right away so you won't be left without volume one if the good doctor persuades Mr. Washington to wish him volume two.
Sherlock Holmes
Now, doctor.
Sir Lionel Greatlake
What.
Mr. Bell
What about next week's story?
Dr. Watson
Next week I'm going to tell you the story of a man 20 years older than his bride and how death came to Rose Hill.
Mr. Bell
And now, in answer to numerous requests, we want to announce that the Sherlock Holmes program has been on the air for three years. The part of Sherlock Holmes is played by Richard Gordon, that of Dr. Watson by Lee Lovell. Neither Mr. Gordon nor Mr. Lovell play the part of a detective and his doctor friend in.
Podcast Summary: Sherlock Holmes - 32-05-19 (069) The Final Problem
Podcast Information:
In this episode of Harold's Old Time Radio, listeners are transported back to the Golden Age of Radio with a gripping adaptation of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's classic tale, "The Final Problem." Hosted by Harolds Old Time Radio, the episode masterfully intertwines a modern commercial narrative with the suspenseful adventures of the legendary detective Sherlock Holmes and his loyal friend, Dr. John Watson.
The story unfolds with Dr. John Watson recounting a perplexing case involving a series of cadaver thefts from St. Anthony's Hospital, a prestigious medical school and hospital combination. Dr. Watson receives an urgent plea from his old friend, Sir Lionel Greatlake, the head of the staff at St. Anthony's, imploring him to enlist Sherlock Holmes's expertise.
Notable Quote:
Dr. Watson [01:14]: "Mr. Bell made it. You came up the steps. Where there's a blazing fire and a steaming cup of G. Washington coffee to welcome you."
Upon arrival, Holmes and Watson join Sir Lionel in the dissecting laboratory, where they inspect the latest theft attempt. The victim is a recently deceased cadaver, lacking preservation treatment, indicating the thief's preference for fresh bodies. Holmes meticulously examines the scene, uncovering multiple fingerprints and traces of various tobaccos, which overwhelm the investigation with too many potential leads.
Notable Quote:
Sherlock Holmes [08:19]: "Well, 14 sets of fingerprints for instance. And in the dust under that operating table alone I found shreds of five different types of tobacco."
Holmes narrows down the suspects to two primary individuals: Dr. Hugo Lacey, the head surgeon obsessed with order, and Mrs. Clutch, the hospital's cleaning woman known for her meticulous nature. Initial evidence, including fingerprints and behavior, points suspicion towards Mrs. Clutch. However, a twist reveals that Dr. Lacey himself is implicated, leading Holmes to delve deeper into a web of deceit.
Notable Quote:
Sherlock Holmes [19:02]: "He hated Mrs. So he wanted to implicate her. It was his big mistake."
As the investigation progresses, Holmes uncovers a sinister plot masterminded by Professor Moriarty. Moriarty has been manipulating Dr. Lacey to conduct illegal facial surgeries on cadavers, forging insurance claims, and orchestrating the thefts to cover his illicit activities. The culmination of Holmes's deductions reveals Moriarty's intricate involvement, leading to his downfall.
Notable Quote:
Sherlock Holmes [23:42]: "Professor Moriarty was getting in touch with quite a number of heavily insured businessmen. One after another these men died. But by and by the insurance companies became suspicious. I was told to investigate."
Deductive Reasoning: The episode highlights Holmes's unparalleled ability to sift through overwhelming evidence to identify the true culprit, emphasizing the importance of attention to detail.
The Complexity of Human Nature: Through the characters of Dr. Lacey and Mrs. Clutch, the narrative explores themes of obsession, reputation, and the lengths individuals will go to protect their standing.
Moral Implications of Scientific Advancements: The misuse of medical knowledge for nefarious purposes serves as a cautionary tale about ethical boundaries in scientific research.
Notable Quote:
Sherlock Holmes [20:32]: "The murderer. He's still at large and he isn't exactly fond of you."
Sherlock Holmes - 32-05-19 (069) The Final Problem delivers a compelling and intricate rendition of one of literature's most beloved detectives. Through a seamless blend of suspenseful storytelling and sharp dialogue, the episode not only entertains but also invites listeners to ponder the deeper moral questions surrounding scientific ethics and personal integrity. As Holmes unravels the complex schemes of Professor Moriarty, audiences are reminded of the timeless appeal of deductive reasoning and the enduring legacy of Sherlock Holmes.
Notable Quote:
Sherlock Holmes [24:52]: "Elemental, my dear. Once."
Additional Notes:
Narrative Integration: The episode cleverly merges product promotions for G. Washington's coffee within the storyline, maintaining an authentic Old Time Radio feel without detracting from the main narrative.
Cast Performance: Richard Gordon and Lee Lovell's portrayals of Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson bring the characters to life, capturing their distinctive personalities and dynamic friendship.
Listeners who haven't experienced this episode will find themselves engrossed in the classic detective tale, enriched by the engaging performances and meticulous production that honor the spirit of the Golden Age of Radio.