The Avenger - Death Meets the Boat

Summary

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Podcast Summary: Harold's Old Time Radio

Episode: The Avenger – Death Meets the Boat

Date: March 16, 2026
Host: Harolds Old Time Radio

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Overview

This episode features a classic installment of "The Avenger," a Golden Age radio drama. The story, "Death Meets the Boat," blends suspense, mystery, and detective work as Jim Brandon (aka The Avenger) and his assistant Fern Collier uncover a sophisticated plot involving inheritance fraud, murder, and kidnapping. The drama delivers classic noir tropes—a wealthy heiress, a cunning impostor, criminal conspiracies, and clever detection—reminiscent of the era's staple radio programs.

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Key Discussion Points & Plot Breakdown

1. Welcoming Dr. Ludlow and Meeting Claire Austin

• [03:05] Jim Brandon and Fern Collier arrive at the docks to welcome Dr. Ludlow, returning from Australia.

• They notice a commotion as Claire Austin, a young heiress, is met by a crowd and photographers.

• Quote:

  "Every single one of them looks excited and happy."
  — Fern Collier [03:16]

• Claire is met by Copley, her late father’s chauffeur, who insists on driving her directly to see her lawyer, Mr. Hayden.

2. Claire Austin's Kidnapping

• [05:18]–[07:20] Copley drives Claire to a secluded lodge. There, it’s revealed she’s been kidnapped as part of a plot.

• Gang members plan to substitute Claire with Thelma, an impostor who closely resembles her—in looks and (with coaching) in voice and manner.

• Memorable moment:

  "You've been kidnapped."
  — Gang Leader to Claire Austin [07:02]

3. Murder of a Reporter and Missing Evidence

• [09:38]–[11:14] Reporter Stamford, who photographed Claire on the dock, is found dead. The murder is designed to look like an accident, but the Avenger deduces otherwise.

• Crucially, four photographic plates—including Claire’s photo—are missing.

• Key deduction:

  "He was hit from the rear by a blackjack… I think you'll agree with me that Stamford was murdered."
  — Jim Brandon [11:38]

4. Fern Investigates the Impostor

• [12:08]–[13:56] Fern interviews the woman masquerading as Claire Austin at the townhouse.

• Fern notices discrepancies: the imposter’s long nails, while the real Claire had bitten short ones earlier that day.

• Notable quote:

  "That girl inside there has nails as long as an Oriental dancer... That girl on the boat had very short nails. I remember thinking that she looked as though she bit them."
  — Fern Collier [13:40]

5. Conferring with Lawyer Neil Hayden

• [16:30]–[17:10] Jim and Fern present their suspicions to Neil Hayden, executor of Claire’s estate. He is skeptical—fingernails alone seem slim evidence for such a case.

• Jim asks for a chance to question the impostor more closely.

• Skeptical response:

  "The length of a girl's fingernails is pretty slim evidence upon which to base a case of this magnitude."
  — Neil Hayden [16:58]

6. The Avenger Tests the Impostor

• [18:02]–[19:32] Jim, undercover, attempts to trip up Thelma (the impostor) by discussing Australia.

• Thelma falters, not knowing details like the extinction of the dodo, but imitates general Aussie references.

• Jim confirms his suspicions after the encounter.

• Quote:

  "That girl has been carefully coached. But she's never seen Australia."
  — Jim Brandon [19:32]

7. The Gang Plots Claire's Demise

• [20:11]–[22:22] The gang debates how and when to dispose of the real Claire Austin, resolving to do so after midnight—after the inheritance passes to "Claire."

• Copley, the chauffeur, is reluctant:

  "You'll do what I say, Copley."
  — Gang Leader [21:41]

8. The Avenger’s Rescue Plan

• [24:03]–[25:20] Jim and Fern trace Copley’s movements using gas station records, zeroing in on the gang’s hideout.

• Jim explains their rescue strategy: Fern will spirit Claire away while Jim confronts the criminals.

• Quote:

  "We can get Ms. Austin out of there in a matter of minutes if we follow our plan."
  — Jim Brandon [25:48]

9. The Rescue Showdown

• [26:30]–[28:29] The Avenger, using his invisibility technology, helps Claire escape through a window and deals with the criminals.
• Classic radio drama action: thugs knocked out, and the heroine is spirited to safety.

10. The Real Claire Unmasked and Justice Served

• [29:08]–[31:30] At a belated birthday party for Claire, the Avenger and Fern reveal how clues (mainly the Australian knowledge test and the fingernail discrepancy) proved the impersonation.

• The real Claire passes Jim’s test about wombats and Australian wildlife, while the impostor failed (claiming to have a pet wombat, an impossibility).

• Quote:

  "Even an Australian school child knows that the wombat can't exist outside the Australian continent."
  — Jim Brandon [31:05]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Fingernail Clue:

  "That girl inside there has nails as long as an Oriental dancer... That girl on the boat had very short nails." — Fern Collier [13:40]

• Skeptical Lawyer:

  "The length of a girl's fingernails is pretty slim evidence upon which to base a case of this magnitude." — Neil Hayden [16:58]

• Pet Wombat Gaffe:

  "Even an Australian school child knows that the wombat can't exist outside the Australian continent." — Jim Brandon [31:05]

• Action Hero Moment:

  "It's the Avenger, Copley. And this is for you. Hurry, Ms. Austin, through that window." — Jim Brandon [28:09]

• Classic Wrap-up:

  "She can thank you for being alive to celebrate it, Fern. You know, if you hadn't noticed Thelma's fingernails, we might never have discovered she was an imposter." — Jim Brandon [30:28]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [03:05] Introduction to Claire Austin and plot set-up
• [05:18] Claire’s kidnapping revealed
• [09:38] Reporter Stamford’s murder investigated
• [12:08] Fern interviews the impostor Claire
• [13:40] Fern’s fingernail clue
• [16:30] Confrontation with lawyer Neil Hayden
• [18:02] The Avenger tests Thelma’s “Australian” knowledge
• [20:11] Gang debates killing Claire
• [24:03] The Avenger and Fern track the kidnap site
• [26:30] Rescue plan and action
• [29:08] Birthday party denouement
• [31:05] Australian wildlife test exposes impostor

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Tone and Language

The episode's tone is classic radio suspense—sharp, brisk dialogue, keen detective observations, and period-appropriate banter. Characters are straightforward, with Fern providing both seriousness and light relief, and Jim Brandon (the Avenger) personifying clever, methodical heroism.

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Conclusion

"Death Meets the Boat" exemplifies the Golden Age radio detective genre, featuring clever deduction, courageous rescue, and a satisfying restoration of justice. The episode is both a nostalgic entertainment and a showcase for how sharp observation and teamwork can thwart even the most cunning criminal plot.

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Transcript

[A]

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[B]

and dance like no one is watching.

[A]

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[C]

Let's Texas.

[B]

The Avenger.

[A]

The road to crime ends in a trap that justice sets. Crime does not pay.

[D]

Ram.

[E]

Ram.

[B]

The Avenger, sworn enemy of evil is actually Jim Brandon, a famous biochemist. Through his numerous scientific experiments, Brandon has perfected several inventions to aid him in his crusade against crime as the Avenger. Most remarkable of these inventions is the highly secret diffusion capsule which cloaks him in the black light of invisibility. Brandon's assistant, the beautiful Fern Collier, is the only one who shares his secrets and knows that he is the man the underworld fears as the Avenger. And now the Avenger. And death meets the boat.

[E]

I love meeting boats. Jim, I'm glad you decided to come down to welcome your old friend Dr. Ludlow home.

[A]

He's been in Australia doing research for three years, Fern. I'm eager to have a talk with him.

[E]

Oh, there's something thrilling about a boat that's just landed from far off places. Look at all these people, Jim. Every single one of them looks excited and happy.

[A]

You're an incurable romanticist, Fern. Oh, there's Dr. Ludlow with a crowd

[E]

of reporters around him.

[A]

I suppose we ought to wait until the interviews are over before we barge in, huh?

[E]

Well, Dr. Ludlow isn't the only celebrity aboard. There's a cameraman taking pictures of a pretty girl. Let's walk over and watch them.

[A]

All right, Fern.

[E]

Do you think she's a movie star, Jim?

[A]

I haven't the faintest idea. That big hat she's wearing hides part of her face.

[C]

Okay, Ms. Austin, that's fine. Now, just one more shot. Suppose you hold onto the rail with one hand and pretend you're waving to someone with the other.

[D]

You mean like this?

[C]

Swell, swell. Hold it, Ms. Austin.

[F]

Ah, thank you.

[C]

Now, a few questions, if you don't mind.

[D]

Well, I.

[C]

Is this your first trip to the States?

[D]

Oh, I know I was born here, but I've lived in Australia since I was 6.

[A]

I see.

[C]

How long do you plan to stay?

[D]

Indefinitely. I intend to settle down here.

[F]

Pardon me, but you're Miss Claire Austin, aren't you?

[D]

Yes.

[F]

I'm Copley, Miss.

[D]

Oh, the chauffeur yes, miss.

[F]

I was with your late father for more than 10 years.

[D]

Well, I'm glad you've come, Copley. I was beginning to wonder if anyone was going to meet me.

[F]

What about your luggage, miss?

[D]

It's all through the customs. You can put it in the car. I'll show you where it is.

[C]

Oh, Ms. Austin, thanks a lot for those pictures. I'd like to interview you for a feature story later. Will you be in town for a while?

[D]

I think so. Goodbye.

[A]

Goodbye.

[C]

And look for your picture in the morning. Hurl tomorrow.

[D]

I will.

[E]

Jim, ask that reporter who she is.

[F]

Okay.

[A]

Fern, you do hate to miss a celebrity, don't you?

[E]

Hurry. Ask him. He's getting ready to leave.

[A]

Say, Scoop.

[D]

Yeah?

[A]

Who is that young lady?

[C]

Oh, that was Claire Austin.

[A]

Claire Austin?

[C]

Yeah, the gal that's going to hurt the Austin millions when she comes of age in two days. Swell looking dish, isn't it,

[D]

Copley? I understood that Mr. Hayden, my father's lawyer, would be waiting for me at my townhouse.

[F]

No, he's spending the weekend at his lodge in the country, Miss. Claire, he asked me to drive you directly out there.

[D]

Well, we could have unloaded some of this luggage in town.

[F]

Well, frankly, miss, that never occurred to me. I thought you'd rather come out here direct from the boat.

[D]

Well, how much further is this lodge?

[F]

We'll be there in half an hour.

[D]

Is that the lodge just ahead there, Copley?

[F]

Yes, Madison. I'll signal them we're coming.

[D]

This certainly is a secluded spot.

[F]

Yes, miss. It's a sort of hideaway.

[D]

Hideaway?

[F]

Well, what I mean is, it's quiet and restful, miss. Here we are. We'll have to get out on that side, miss. There's a high fence over here.

[D]

All right,

[F]

now, this way. I'll get someone to help me with the luggage.

[C]

Well, hello, Ms. Austin. Welcome to the States.

[D]

Well, thank you. I suppose you're Mr. Hayden, my lawyer.

[A]

No.

[C]

Come in and I'll explain myself. Tell me, did you have a good trip?

[D]

Yes, thank you. Where is Mr. Hayden, please?

[C]

All in good time, Ms. Austen. To be quite frank, there's been a slight change in plan.

[D]

Well, I should think so. I expected to meet Mr. Hayden in town. Don't tell me we've driven all the way out here.

[F]

Why don't you put our wise, Gus, we're wasting time.

[C]

Yes, I guess we are at that point.

[D]

Copley, what is all this? Who is this man?

[C]

Never mind that. All you need to know, Ms. Austin, is that you've been kidnapped.

[E]

Kidnapped?

[C]

Now, if you'll just do what we say.

[E]

But I won't.

[D]

I'm getting out of here.

[F]

Grab her, Copley. Here, take it easy.

[E]

Let me go.

[F]

Now, you better do what Gus tells you do.

[A]

Otherwise, take her in the next room,

[C]

Copley, and put these bracelets on her hands and feet.

[D]

No. All right.

[F]

Film in there.

[C]

Yes, everything's set. Get the steam in there.

[F]

Say, Gus, that Austin dame's a wildcat.

[C]

Did you get those bracelets on her?

[F]

Yeah, but it wasn't easy.

[C]

Well, as soon as Thelma gets a line on her voice and speech, we'll get going.

[F]

Say, Gus. Yes? Those two dames look enough alike to be twins. Where'd you find that? Thelma?

[C]

She worked for me once before on a job in Canada. When you showed me those pictures of Claire Austin, I was struck by the resemblance. All we had to do with Thelma was bleach her hair.

[F]

What about the accent? Can she handle that?

[C]

Oh, that's easy. She's passed herself off as an English blue blood more than once. Now, Copley, let's get down to business. Did everything at the boat go without a hitch?

[F]

Well, not exactly, Gus. Some newspaper guy took Austin's picture before I could get to her. What? Well, I couldn't help it, but that can't hurt anything. Connor. These two dames look exactly alike.

[A]

Don't be a fool, Copley.

[C]

It's little mistakes like that that ruin the best kind of setups. What paper was that reporter from?

[F]

The Morning Herald.

[C]

Oh, good. Since it's a morning paper, that'll give us time to get that picture. Copley, see if Thelma's ready. We've got to get into town at once.

[D]

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[C]

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[A]

Okay, Pete, tell me everything you know about Stanford's death.

[F]

Well, Mr. Brandon, he was alive here in the dark room when I went to lunch around noon.

[A]

What was he doing when you left?

[F]

Developing the pictures he took this morning for tomorrow's paper.

[A]

Is there any way to find out if Stamford had a visitor, Pete?

[F]

No, Those back stairs are the only way in and out of this dark room. They lead right out to the street.

[A]

Oh, now there's no connecting door into the newspaper office?

[F]

No, sir.

[A]

Well, what do you think happened to Stamford, Pete?

[F]

I figure he broke that bottle of acid accidentally. And the fumes overcame him. And he fell as he hit his head against the corner of that shell.

[A]

Almost too simple, isn't it?

[F]

Well, that must have been the way it happened. The bottle of acid is broken, and Stamford has a big lump on his head.

[A]

Pete, would Stamford have a list of the pictures he was developing?

[F]

Well, sure. He'd have a list of each series of plates.

[A]

Where are they?

[F]

Oh, there.

[B]

That.

[F]

That sheet of note paper on that spike. He only took two sets of pictures so far today.

[A]

Let me see.

[C]

Ed Will, please.

[F]

Oh, here. Mm.

[A]

First six plates. Opening of New Market. Are all six of those plates here, Pete?

[F]

Yeah, here they are. He must be working on those when he passed out.

[A]

Okay, next four plates on board boat.

[F]

Nope. Can't find those.

[A]

Make sure, Pete.

[F]

No, they're not here, Mr. Brandon.

[C]

Now, who do you suppose you want

[A]

to steal four perfectly beautiful shots of Miss Claire Austin?

[F]

What's that, Mr. Brandon?

[A]

Oh, never mind. Pete, give me a little more light over here, will you? I want to take another look at this bump on Stamford's head.

[F]

Well, here. I'll focus this desk lamp on him.

[A]

Oh, thanks.

[F]

You knew Stamford, didn't you, Mr. Brandon?

[A]

Well, I saw him on the boat this morning. Say, the position of this bump is mighty odd.

[F]

How do you mean?

[A]

Well, if Stamford hit his head against that shelf, the lump would have to be toward the back of his head. This lump's right on top.

[F]

Yeah. What do you make of it?

[A]

Well, I say he was hit from the rear by a blackjack. Say, I'll call the doctor in on this right away. But I think you'll agree with me that Stamford was murdered. Well, there's Claire Austin's townhouse friend. Now, I'll wait here in the car while you play reporter and try to get an interview.

[E]

But, Jim, you say you don't suspect Claire Austin of murdering Stanford. So why should we waste time on her?

[A]

Those stolen plates bearing Ms. Austin's picture are the only clue we have. Fern. Maybe they tie up in some way with a motive for this murder.

[E]

How many days, Grace did the Herald give you?

[A]

Three. I promised them a scoop if they'd call it an accident. That long.

[E]

Then you don't want me to mention Anything to Ms. Austen about Stanford's death?

[C]

No.

[A]

Keep the interview general. Try to find out if she has any friends or enemies in this country, what she plans to do when she inherits her money and things like that. You know, it's just possible that someone is trying to blackmail her.

[E]

All right, I'll do my best. But I still think we're barking up the wrong tree.

[A]

Jim, here's your camera. Study her reactions when you ask to take some pictures.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Don't miss a thing, Fern. A woman's touch is what we need in this.

[F]

Fern.

[C]

What happened?

[A]

I wasn't expecting you back so soon.

[E]

Jim. Start driving, quick.

[A]

What is it?

[F]

You're.

[A]

You're shaking like a leaf.

[E]

Jim, that girl in there posing as Claire Austin isn't the same girl we saw on the boat.

[F]

What?

[E]

I knew you wouldn't believe me, but she isn't.

[A]

Well, what makes you think so?

[E]

Well, I'll admit she looks exactly like her and she's sounds exactly like her, but it's not the same girl.

[A]

Now, Fern.

[E]

It's not, Jim. I can tell by her fingernails.

[A]

Her fingernails?

[D]

Yes.

[E]

That girl on the boat had very short nails. I remember thinking that she looked as though she bit them. I got a good look at her left hand when Stanford had her wave in our direction.

[A]

Well, go ahead.

[E]

Well, that girl inside there has nails as long as an Oriental dancer.

[C]

What?

[A]

Fernando, I hate to dampen your enthusiasm over your great discovery, but Claire Austin has had five hours to put on artificial nails since that boat dock this morning.

[E]

But they're not artificial, Jim. I asked her.

[A]

Well, if that's the case, we've got a motive. That girl could be posing as Claire Austin to collect Claire's inheritance.

[E]

But what happened to Claire?

[A]

I don't know, but I think we'd better get in touch with Neil Hayden at once.

[E]

Oh, yes, he's the lawyer in charge of the Austin case, isn't he?

[A]

Yes.

[E]

Jim, all this adds up to the fact that the real Claire may have been kidnapped, doesn't it?

[A]

I'm afraid it does, Fern. And if we can't locate her before midnight tomorrow, when she comes of age, she'll be in danger of a life.

[E]

It's sam.

[B]

Now, back to the Avenger. And death meets the boat.

[A]

And that's the story. Neil. As the lawyer in charge of Ms. Austin's estate, I. I hope you can delay the transfer of the property until we can find the real Claire.

[B]

Well, now, I can't hold back the clock, Jim. At midnight tomorrow, control of the Austin millions passes into Claire's hands automatically.

[E]

But surely there's something we can do, Mr. Hayden. We can't just stand by and let the real Claire be killed and this imposter inherit her money.

[A]

Fern, I don't think Neil is much impressed with the story we've just told him. What about it, Neil?

[B]

Well, frankly, Jim, it sounds utterly fantastic. The length of a girl's fingernails is pretty slim. Evidence upon which to Basic case of this magnitude. Now, I need something more to go on than that.

[A]

Well, if you can arrange for me to have a talk with this girl, I think I can find out whether she's the real Claire or not.

[B]

All right. I've arranged a little birthday party for her tonight. I'll take you along.

[F]

Fine.

[A]

Oh, only remember, don't let her know I'm a detective.

[B]

I never think of you as a detective, Jim. To me, you're a scientist who sometimes dabbles a bit in criminology.

[A]

You know, I don't think you intended that as a compliment.

[E]

Well, what about me? Don't I get invited to the party?

[A]

Oh, I'm afraid not, Vern. Ms. Austin thinks you're a reporter, remember?

[B]

Well, Jim, have you managed to talk with Ms. Austin yet?

[A]

No, I haven't. That fellow Merkel over there is monopolizing her. Who is he? Neil Merkel.

[F]

I don't know.

[B]

Claire invited him. Said he was an old friend, an importer, I think she said.

[A]

Merkel? Never heard of him. Suppose we wander over and break up their little tete? A tete, huh?

[B]

All right. But I sincerely hope your hunch is wrong, Jim.

[A]

So do I.

[C]

Uh.

[A]

Oh, Merkel sees us coming, he's moving away.

[B]

Well, here's your opportunity, Jim. Oh, Claire.

[D]

Yes, Mr. Hayden.

[B]

Mr. Brandon is eager to have a chat with you about Australia. You know, he spent some time there himself.

[D]

Oh, really? What part of Australia, Mr. Brandon?

[A]

New South Wales, mostly. You come from Sydney, don't you?

[D]

Yes, that's right. Did you spend much time there?

[A]

No, I didn't. My travels took me farther inland. I was doing a little exploring.

[D]

I see.

[A]

You know, we Americans are always interested in the animals of Australia. The dodos, great auks and wombats are fascinating.

[D]

Yes, they are. And don't forget the kangaroos. We're frightfully proud of those.

[A]

Yes, but. But as pets, the wombats are more amusing.

[D]

Ah, they do.

[A]

I suppose you owned one?

[D]

Oh, yes, a darling one. I. I'm arranging. Have it sent over here as soon as I get settled.

[C]

Oh, excuse me, Claire, but the Websters are leaving. I thought you'd like to speak to her.

[D]

Thank you, Mr. Merkel. Excuse me, Mr. Brandon. Mr. Hayden, of course.

[B]

Certainly, Clara. Well, Jim, as far as I could see, Ms. Austin seemed to pass that examination all right.

[A]

On the contrary, Neil, that girl has been carefully coached. But she's never seen Australia.

[D]

Some party. You mean to tell me that's what the millionaires call having a good time?

[C]

I'm afraid you'll have to get used to it, Thelma.

[D]

I will not. As soon as I come into that money, Gus Merkel, I'm going away on a long vacation.

[C]

Hmm. We'll talk about that later. That must be Coakley.

[A]

Come in.

[C]

Have all the servants gone to bed, Coakley?

[F]

Sure. I waited till the coast was clear.

[C]

Okay, now let's get down to business. First of all, what was that guy Brandon talking about tonight, Thelma?

[A]

Australia.

[D]

He's traveled there.

[F]

What?

[D]

Ah, don't worry, Gus. I handled him all right. I let him do all the talking. I just followed suit with the generalities.

[C]

Okay, okay. But steer clear of people like that until your coaching is over. Tomorrow, Thelma, you'll develop a headache and stay in your room all day.

[D]

Suits me.

[C]

Now, that brings us to the real Claire Austin. If everything goes without a hitch, we've got to get rid of her right after midnight tomorrow.

[D]

You should have done that first thing, Gus. Why are you waiting until the last minute to bump her off?

[C]

Because there's no point in hanging her murder around our necks until we're sure we pull this job off.

[D]

What's the difference? It might just as well be hanged for two murders as one.

[C]

Nobody calls Stanford's death murder. Even the paper he worked on called it an accident. I was plenty careful to make it look that way.

[D]

Well, who's going to take care of this Austin dame and how?

[C]

Copley, you know the plan. Get yourself up to the lodge tomorrow night and take care of it.

[F]

Not me, Gus. That's your job. I only agreed to finger this layout.

[C]

You'll do what I say, Copley.

[F]

I tell you, I won't do it. I can't, Gus. I knew our old man for 10 years.

[C]

This isn't the time to turn soft, Copley. From here on in, I'm the boss and you take orders from me.

[F]

Not that order.

[C]

Oh, then maybe a good mussing up will change your mind.

[D]

Gus, not here.

[C]

Here or now. Either he does what I say, or I'll lay him out flat. Take your choice, Copley.

[F]

All right, let me alone. I'll do it.

[D]

Guess I'd feel safer about that Austin girl if you took care of her corporately. Might get cold feet at the last minute and gum up everything.

[C]

Yeah. Yes. I'll have to go with him, I guess, and see that he carries out his assignment.

[D]

Access to affordable credit helps me pay

[E]

my employees, but I don't really need it.

[F]

Infliction is killing me, but who cares? Big retailers are making record profits. That's why we support the Durbin Marshall credit card bill.

[E]

See, banks and credit unions help small businesses make payroll. This bill would cut the vital resources

[F]

they need while increasing megastore profits. They deserve it, don't they?

[D]

Tell Congress, stop the Durbin Marshall money

[A]

grab for corporate megastores.

[D]

Paid for by the Electronic Payments Coalition.

[G]

This episode is brought to you by Spreaker, the platform responsible for a rapidly spreading condition known as podcast brain. Symptoms include buying microphones you don't need, explaining RSS feeds to confused relatives and saying things like, sorry, I can't talk right now. I'm editing audio. If this sounds familiar, you're probably already a podcaster. The good news is Spreaker makes the whole process simple. You record your show, upload it once, and Spreaker distributes it everywhere. People listen. Apple podcasts, Spotify, and about a dozen apps your cousin swears are the next big thing. Even better, Spreaker helps you monetize your show with ads, meaning your podcast might someday pay for, well, more microphones. Start your show [e-mail] spreaker because if you're going to talk to yourself for an hour, you might as well publish it.

[E]

Jim, don't think I'm not enjoying this lovely ride in the country. But.

[A]

But you're dying to know what we're doing out here, right, Fern?

[E]

Yes. Why did you stop at that gasoline station back there? You didn't buy any gas.

[A]

No, but I got some information.

[E]

Jim, please. What's going on?

[A]

Well, Fern, here's the way I have things figured out. Copley, the chauffeur, met the real Claire Austin at the boat. Three hours later, he delivered the phony Claire Austin at her house in town.

[E]

Copley was the one who kidnapped Ms. Austin then?

[A]

Oh, he had to have a hand in it. Probably set up the job for a gang. A thing like this would take some organizing.

[E]

But what makes you so sure he brought her way out here?

[A]

Neil Hayden had Copley's gas credit card checked for me. And the records show that Copley gassed up at that station back there three times within the last few weeks. The station attendant remembers him. Says Copley's car always turned off on this side road. We're on now.

[E]

Oh, we're looking for the hideaway.

[A]

Yes. So keep your eyes peeled, Fern, because our time is running out.

[E]

Jim, it's past midnight. Maybe this isn't the house at all.

[A]

I'm sure it is, Vernon. There are two husky fellows guarding the front driveway.

[E]

But how do you plan to get inside the house, Jim?

[A]

When the criminals arrive, I'll go right in with them as the Avenger.

[E]

But what if the criminal should call up the guards here and tell them to kill Claire?

[A]

They can't, Fern. There are no telephone wires leading into that house. They'll have to show up in person.

[E]

I'm getting nervous, Jim.

[A]

Now, Fearne, we can get Ms. Austin out of there in a matter of minutes if we follow our plan.

[E]

Well, let's go over it again, Jim. I'd never forgive myself if I bungled my end of it.

[A]

But you won't, Fearne. Here's the way we'll manage it. The moment I get inside the house, I'll unlock this back window. Ms. Austin will come out and join you here. Then you two make tracks through the woods to our car and head straight for town.

[E]

What about you, Jim?

[A]

I'll join you later. Inspector White and Neil Hayden will meet you in front of Ms. Austin's house in town. They'll escort the real heiress inside to face the imposter. They've arrived. I'll go around and join them at the corner of the house as the Avenger.

[E]

Good luck, Jim.

[C]

Come on, Copley, let's make short work of this. Wait a minute. What was that noise?

[F]

Sounded like one of the tires went flat.

[C]

Well, get out your flash and take a look. Got a lot of traveling to do in this car tonight.

[F]

Okay, now. Rear tires are all right. Have a look at the front ones here. The front ones are all right, too. Nothing wrong here.

[C]

You sure? Sure. Come on, then. Open the front door. All right, Copley, go into the next room and get the Austin dame. Take the bracelets off her and see that there are no marks where she was fastened to the bed. And don't use the blackjack until we get her in the car.

[F]

Why not? It'd be easier.

[C]

I want those two guards outside to see her alive when she leaves here. The less they know, the safer we are. Go ahead now. Bring her out.

[F]

All right.

[D]

Oh, come back.

[F]

Yes, Ms. Austin? We've decided to take you away from here.

[D]

Where? Where are you taking me?

[F]

Hold still. I'll take these handcuffs off your hands and feet.

[D]

Well, it's a relief anyway.

[A]

Ms. Austin. Through that window, quickly.

[F]

Who's that?

[E]

Who's in here?

[A]

It's the Avenger, Copley. And this is for you. Hurry, Ms. Austin, through that window. Go with the young lady outside.

[E]

All right.

[C]

What's going on in there? Copley.

[F]

Copley, can you.

[C]

What happened? Where's the girl?

[F]

Copley?

[A]

He's out cold, Myrkle. And here's something for you, too, from the Avenger.

[E]

Ram. Sam. Claire Austin's birthday party is a great success, Jim, even if it is a few days late.

[A]

Well, she can thank you for being alive to celebrate it, Fern. You know, if you hadn't noticed Thelma's fingernails, we might never have discovered she was an imposter.

[E]

Oh, Jim, you're just flattering me. No, the fingernails weren't the only clue you had. What really convinced you that Thelma wasn't Claire?

[A]

She failed on the examination I gave her about Australia.

[E]

How?

[A]

Well, aside from not knowing that the dodo has been extinct since the 17th century, she said she had a wombat for a pet and was bringing it here.

[E]

Well, a wombat's a small bear, isn't it?

[A]

That's right. But even an Australian school child knows that the wombat can't exist outside the Australian continent.

[E]

Oh, what a shame. It sounds like a nice pet.

[A]

Wrong again, Ms. Collier. The wombat sleeps all day and wanders forth at night in search of food. Now, hardly the general conception of a pet, don't you think?

[E]

All right, teacher. Did the real Claire Austin pass that test?

[A]

With flying colors. And I'm sure if you really want a wombat for a pet, she'll order one stuff and sent over by special plane.

[E]

Oh, come on, Jim. Let's dance.

[B]

All characters, names, places and plots used in the Avenger program are fictitious. Any similarity to persons living or dead is purely coincidental. This is a thought. A thought. A thought.

[A]

Remember? Listen for another adventure of

[B]

the Avenger.