The Fabulous Dr. Tweedy 47-02-12 (24) The Valentine's Day Dance

Summary

Podcast Summary: "The Fabulous Dr. Tweedy 47-02-12 (24) The Valentine's Day Dance"

Podcast Information:

• Title: Harold's Old Time Radio
• Host/Author: Harold's Old Time Radio
• Episode: The Fabulous Dr. Tweedy 47-02-12 (24) The Valentine's Day Dance
• Release Date: April 12, 2025

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Introduction and Setting

"The Fabulous Dr. Tweedy" transports listeners to the elegant and socially intricate world of Potts College during the Golden Age of Radio. Set against the backdrop of a Valentine's Day Dance, the episode weaves a narrative filled with romance, conflict, and societal expectations.

Main Characters

• Dr. Thaddeus Q. Tweedy: Dean of Potts College, a widowed father to Sydney, and a man of high moral standards.
• Sydney Potts: Dr. Tweedy's adopted son, a charming and somewhat naive young man engaged to Mary.
• Mary: Sydney's beloved fiancée, whose engagement to Sydney becomes a focal point of the evening.
• Timothy: Dr. Tweedy's other son, an accomplished prizefighter with a tough demeanor.
• Georgia Genevieve Culpepper: A passionate and romantic student infatuated with Sydney.
• Frank Morgan (Colonel Jackson): A Southern gentleman who becomes entangled in the romantic conflicts of the evening.
• Mrs. Apopolis: A vivacious character who adds comedic tension to the interactions.

The Engagement Announcement

The episode unfolds during a grand Valentine's Day Dance at the faculty club, where Dr. Tweedy announces the formal engagement of his adopted son, Sydney, to Mary. This moment is marked by heartfelt speeches and the presentation of a cherished family ring.

Dr. Tweedy (06:29): "A lifetime of happiness, Sidney. My mother wore it for 40 years. I hope it'll bring you and Mary the same kind of love and understanding my father and mother had."

The ring symbolizes not just the union of two individuals but also the continuation of family legacy and values.

The Love Triangle

Amidst the celebrations, Georgia Genevieve Culpepper reveals her deep affection for Sydney, igniting a romantic tension that threatens to disrupt the evening's harmony.

Georgia Genevieve Culpepper (11:43): "I'm in love. Head over heels in love with a hat man this side of Savannah."

Her confession to Dr. Tweedy sets off a series of events as she seeks his advice on winning Sydney's heart. Dr. Tweedy, maintaining his composed demeanor, urges Georgia to pursue her feelings despite Sydney's existing engagement.

Dr. Tweedy (12:45): "Go after the boy. Fight for your love. Speak up. To the winner goes the spoils."

Conflict and Confrontation

Georgia's pursuit of Sydney leads to conflict with Frank Morgan, Colonel Jackson, who harbors his own romantic interests. The tension escalates as both men vie for Georgia's attention, each embodying different cultural ideals—Frank as the Southern gentleman and Dr. Tweedy as the genteel academic.

Frank Morgan (25:25): "Miss Georgia. May I say, your beauty is most distracting. Your features are as delicate as a sweet magnolia bird."

Their interactions highlight the clash between traditional Southern charm and Dr. Tweedy's more subdued, scholarly approach to romance.

Resolution and Conclusion

As the evening progresses, the formal engagement announcement brings the event to a climax. Sydney and Mary reaffirm their commitment, while Georgia's romantic pursuits lead to heartbreak and a realization of unreciprocated feelings.

Frank Morgan (24:34): "Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention, please? I wish to take this occasion to announce the formal engagement of my daughter, Mary to Dr. Tweedy's son, Sydney."

Dr. Tweedy navigates the delicate situation with grace, ensuring that Sydney and Mary's engagement remains untainted by unwanted romantic entanglements.

Dr. Tweedy (22:55): "Nothing, Mr. Potts. She's just making a big fuss because she got kissed. You can't blame a man for kissing a pretty girl when he has an opportunity."

The episode concludes with resolutions that uphold the integrity of the characters' relationships, emphasizing themes of love, honor, and societal expectations.

Notable Quotes

• Frank Morgan (00:00): "Step into the world of power, loyalty and luck. I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse."
• Timothy (01:18): "I'm all bundled up in my Woolies and I want to throw snowballs."
• Georgia Genevieve Culpepper (11:58): "He doesn't love me. Look at me. Do you think I'm attractive?"
• Dr. Tweedy (12:54): "Go after the boy. Fight for your love. Speak up. To the winner goes the spoils."
• Frank Morgan (27:12): "Come here, sugar. I got a better place. Why waste that big old moon's time?"
• Dr. Tweedy (24:25): "There's absolutely no reason why you should be so unreasonable."

Conclusion

"The Valentine's Day Dance" episode of "The Fabulous Dr. Tweedy" masterfully intertwines themes of love, duty, and personal desires set within a richly detailed social setting. Through its engaging dialogue and memorable characters, the episode captures the essence of the Golden Age of Radio, offering listeners a nostalgic yet timeless story of romance and rivalry.

Transcript

[Frank Morgan]

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[Dr. Tweedy]

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[Frank Morgan]

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[Announcer]

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[Frank Morgan]

The fabulous Dr. Tweed.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Written by Robert Riley Crutcher, featuring Harry.

[Frank Morgan]

Von Zel and starring Frank Morgan. Dr. Thaddeus Q. Tweedy, dean of Bennett.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Potts College, has taught his last class for the day and is relaxing at.

[Frank Morgan]

Home playing a Mozart melody on his basso.

[Timothy]

Hello, Dr. Tweety.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, good afternoon, Timothy. It's a pleasure to see your great big, bright, beaming face.

[Timothy]

Oh, I bet you're just saying that.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Of course I am.

[Timothy]

I'm all bundled up in my Woolies and I want to throw snowballs. Can Welby come out and play?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Timothy, do you think it's dignified for the house of the Phi Beta quota fraternity to be seen playing in the snow?

[Timothy]

Oh, I throw snowballs for exercise.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yeah.

[Timothy]

Did I ever tell you I'm a prize fighter? I've had 87 fights so far. Not many guys last that long. They go crazy, you know? Punch drunk. And when they're really gone, they hear bells all the time. Answer the phone, please.

[Dr. Tweedy]

That wasn't the phone, Timothy. It was the bell for the fifth round.

[Timothy]

Let me hit him. I'm gonna go in that room, I'm gonna knock his head off.

[Dr. Tweedy]

No, no, no, no, no, no. You've had enough. He fouled you twice. I'm throwing in the towel.

[Timothy]

That referee is playing.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, you'll find Welby in Colonel Jackson's backyard. He's helping him build a pistol range.

[Timothy]

Thanks, Dr. Tweety. You're the best. Second Amber. I'll go right on over there.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yes, well, have a good time. And keep your mitt. Rainbow.

[Timothy]

Oh, hello, Colonel Jackson.

[Frank Morgan]

Afternoon, Kimberly.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Hello.

[Timothy]

Hello, Welby.

[Frank Morgan]

Hiya, Timothy. Look, I'm busy. Goodbye.

[Timothy]

Oh, Wilby, don't be mean to me. Let's go build a snow woman. It's so much fun to stack them up.

[Frank Morgan]

No, let's go down to the corner, face the main whistle at the real thing. It's a windy day, you know. There'll be plenty of tomatoes blowing by. Just a moment, gentlemen. Well, be. Yes, sir, did I hear you say you were going down the corner to whistle that tomato? Yeah, Colonel. You want to come along? Well, Beskingle, don't you ever refer to the fair sex as tomatoes in my presence. Yes. Women are the loveliest, most precious things on Earth. They ought to be sheltered and protected. I pity you. If I ever catch you whistling a woman. Welby.

[Timothy]

You stop picking on Welby. Did I ever tell you I'm a prize fighter?

[Frank Morgan]

Did I ever tell you I'm a dead shark?

[Timothy]

Well, I.

[Frank Morgan]

To put it in your terms, Timothy, I've had 87 duels so far. Yeah, but not many men can last that long. Yes, sir, they're certainly taken dead, you know, deceased. And when they're really gone, I buy them lilies. Do I make myself clear? Timothy. Timothy, this is one phone we ain't waiting to answer. Come on. Oh, Dr. Tweedy. Dr. Tweedy, sir.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Hello, Colonel. Did Welby get the bell installed in your pistol range?

[Frank Morgan]

Yes, indeed. It's all finished. Well, would you care to join me in a couple of shots, sir?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, I don't mind if I do.

[Frank Morgan]

Here's your pistol, sir.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Oh, pistol.

[Frank Morgan]

I think you better speak to Welby regarding his attitude toward women. If I ever caught a man being disrespectful or ungentlemanly toward a lady, I'd pick up my pistol and I'd.

[Dr. Tweedy]

You're absolutely right, Colonel. I'd do the same thing. I'd pick up my pistol and I.

[Frank Morgan]

Dr. Tweedy, sir.

[Timothy]

Look.

[Frank Morgan]

Look at the rear tire on my car.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Flat isn't. Goodbye, Colonel. Well, Mary and Sydney. I didn't expect you home so early.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Sydney had a little accident. We were jitterbugging at the mall, shopping. He lost his Send her butt.

[Sydney]

Hey, you can't dance holding up your pants.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, you better sit down, Sydney.

[Sydney]

Oh, I'm all right now, dad. Mary gave me a couple of pins.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Oh, she did? You better sit down, Mary.

[Mrs. Apopolis]

I'm all right.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

I took the pins out of my corsage.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Oh.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Well, I'll go make a pot of hot chocolate for all of us.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, Sydney, tomorrow night's the big night. You and Mary will be formally engaged. You're not nervous, are you?

[Sydney]

No. No, dad.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, stop biting your fingernails.

[Sydney]

I'm worried. I'm still two bucks short on the down payment for the ring.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yeah? Well, then just take a little look into this box. Gosh. Gee. Holy smoke.

[Sydney]

A ring. How much was the down payment on that?

[Dr. Tweedy]

A lifetime of happiness, Sidney. My mother Wore it for 40 years. I hope It'll bring you and Mary the same kind of love and understanding my father and mother had.

[Sydney]

Oh, it belonged to them.

[Dr. Tweedy]

That's right.

[Sydney]

You're giving it to me.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yes.

[Sydney]

But, dad, I'm your adopted son. I mean, there's a difference. You don't have to.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Sydney, I didn't adopt you because I wanted an adopted son. I did it because I wanted a son. Here's the ring.

[Sydney]

Thanks, Dan. Then you really approve of Mary, too, huh?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Oh, yes. Sidney. When you two get married, I'll have a son and a daughter. And then pretty soon I'll have a. You'll marry. I'm too young. I'm too young to be a grandfather.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Here we are. Three cups of steaming hot chocolate with floating marshmallows.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yeah. Thank you.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Move over, Sidney. I want to sit beside you.

[Sydney]

But there isn't room enough in this chair.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Oh, yes, there is. Of course. It's a tight squeeze. Sydney.

[Sydney]

Dad, you look kind of sleepy.

[Dr. Tweedy]

I'm wide awake, and I'm not going to bed. It's too early. Go ahead. Show her the ring.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Sydney, that ring you've got. Our engagement ring.

[Sydney]

Dad gave it to me. It belonged to his mother.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Oh, it's beautiful. Oh, Dr. Tweedy, you're the most wonderful man in the world. I've never been so happy in my life. Oh, Sydney. Oh, Dr. Tweedy.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Oh, dear. On second thought, I believe I will go to bed.

[Frank Morgan]

Hey, Doc. What a clothes horse you are.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, thank you, Welby. But finish tying my tie. It's almost time to go.

[Frank Morgan]

Yes. The door. I'll get it, Doc.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yeah.

[Frank Morgan]

Oh, Hello, Doc. Announcing Mrs. Apopolis, Esquire.

[Mrs. Apopolis]

The wheedle, my sweetle. Here's that gorgeous, ravishing apophis in person.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Mrs. Apopolis, that black suit evening gown is a magnificent engineering achievement.

[Mrs. Apopolis]

For that compliment, we'd like to squeeze you to pieces. Come here, please, Mr. Poplas.

[Dr. Tweedy]

You'll crush my fresh white dickey.

[Mrs. Apopolis]

Ah, more and more.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Woof. Mr. Populous, please control yourself. You know, I feel, you know that Sydney and Mary are having their engagement announced tonight.

[Mrs. Apopolis]

Yes, I know. Tweedle, tootsie. I'll be there. Ah, love, love, love.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

I love it.

[Mrs. Apopolis]

Ah, but most of all, I love not wearing a tight girdle, which is choking me tonight. I'm footloose and loose all over.

[Dr. Tweedy]

You're looking at a happy greeting, Mr. Populous. I must admit it. You certainly look chic.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Oh, chic.

[Mrs. Apopolis]

I never felt better in my life. Ah, look at me. Nothing but curves. Gorgeous. Ah, today is the day for love. I'm kissing all the boys.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Hold still.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Sweetle and Anna, are you. No.

[Mrs. Apopolis]

There I am. Counting.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Mrs. Apopolis, you're too free with your osculations.

[Mrs. Apopolis]

Now, wait a minute for. Not so fast. What's this osculation?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, it's merely a kiss. Like this?

[Sydney]

Oh, sweet.

[Mrs. Apopolis]

What a thrill. My heart is beating like a trap hammer.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Oh, what technique.

[Mrs. Apopolis]

I won't wash this hand for a week.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Excuse me, Mrs. Populous.

[Mrs. Apopolis]

Another woman, huh? Good night, Tweety.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Oh, good evening, Dr. Tweedy. I'm one of your students. Course, I guess you never know this poor little old me.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yes, of course. I remember you perfectly, Ms. Culpepper.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Georgia Genevieve Culpepper. I just love to talk to you in private. Dr. Tweedy.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yes, Culpepper? Come right this way to my study. Now, what seems to be the trouble? Ms. Culpepper.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Call me Georgia. All my close gentlemen friends call me Georgia.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yeah, they do. Georgia. I mean, Ms. Culpepper.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Dr. Tweedy, I'm gonna bear my little old heart to you.

[Dr. Tweedy]

You are?

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

I'm in love. Head over heels in love with a hat man this side of Savannah.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, that should make you happy. What's wrong with that?

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

He doesn't love me. Look at me. Do you think I'm attractive?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Ew. Why, that man must be an idiot.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Dr. Tweeter, you're so sweet. Just as sweet as an apple. Pandowity.

[Dr. Tweedy]

You can go, too.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

And you got a twinkle in your eye. Oh, excuse me. I'm so bold. But like I was saying, I love this boy. He kissed me once. A tender, passionate kiss that was like a sheet of fire.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Hell, yeah. It's kind of warm in here. I'd better open a window.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Right then and there. I knew I loved him, but he ran off with another woman. Dr. Tweeter, what am I going to do?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Go after the boy. Fight for your love. Speak up. To the winner goes the spoils. Get him before he spoils.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Dr. Tweedy, you're a genius. Are you sure you're not a Southern man?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Oh, you penetrated my disguise.

[Timothy]

My advice to you is to get.

[Dr. Tweedy]

In there and fight for your sheet of fire.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Dr. Tweeda, you made me just as bold as Brad. I'm gonna douse myself with Scream of Ecstasy perfume and take Sydney away from Mary.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Goodbye, Mary. You do you.

[Sydney]

Mary.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Sydney. Oh, no. I've done it.

[Colonel Jackson]

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[Dr. Tweedy]

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[Colonel Jackson]

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[Dr. Tweedy]

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[Colonel Jackson]

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[Colonel Jackson]

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[Announcer]

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[Frank Morgan]

And now back to Frank Morgan as the fabulous Dr. Tweedy. The silver moonlight falls on pure white snow and the night is filled with music. Inside the faculty club, beautiful women glide gracefully across the dance floor. Handsome, debonair men. Look into their eyes with fiery glances.

[Timothy]

Oh, well, Behance.

[Frank Morgan]

Well, don't look at me, Timothy.

[Timothy]

You know, when I was a prize fighter, I was sure popular with the women. They came miles around just to feel my muscles.

[Frank Morgan]

Yeah, well, we ain't supposed to dance. We're supposed to serve us. Here, punch me.

[Dr. Tweedy]

I want you to stay at the door and let me know the minute Ms. Culpepper arrives. It's very important.

[Frank Morgan]

Yes. Okay, Doc. Timothy, you stay here and guard the punch board.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Quick, quick.

[Frank Morgan]

Give me a tall glass of punch.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, it's just plain orange juice and pineapple juice. There's no punch in it.

[Frank Morgan]

Oh, well, never mind. Quee.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Oh, good evening, Mr. Box.

[Frank Morgan]

Tweety, I'm so nervous. I can't. I'm scared today.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yes, well, where is Mrs. Potts?

[Frank Morgan]

Please, Tweety, don't bring her up. I'm already upset. You know I'm announcing my daughter's engagement tonight.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, Mr. Pot, you're chairman of the Board of trustees. You've made a lot of speeches.

[Frank Morgan]

Yes, you're right. I'm being silly. Tweety, why do you keep staring over towards the door?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, I'm looking for a certain young lady. And when I find her, I'm going to take her straight to the library.

[Frank Morgan]

Library?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yes.

[Frank Morgan]

Girl?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yes.

[Frank Morgan]

Are you going to read?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Oh, there she is. Excuse me, Mr. Pot.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Good evening, Dr. Tweety. Like you said, I'm going to fight for the man I love. What do you think of my sheer strifeless evening gown?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yeah. Oh, yes. Well, you'd better not do any fighting in that. Come with me to the library, Ms. Culpepper. I want to know everything that has taken place between you and Sydney.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Are you sure you want to know? Well, everything.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, I, I, I, I. Yes, everything.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Well, it's going to be hard to remember everything because Sydney just makes me swoon.

[Dr. Tweedy]

It does?

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Well, let's see. Now, we were sitting out a dance and then the lights went out.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yes, I guess somebody blew a fuse.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

And then Sydney kissed me and my toes curled up. My heart started beating like a. Tom. Tom. I heard bill. Beautiful music.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Ms. Culpepper, this is absolutely absurd. You can't fall in love with a man just because he kisses you once.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

I don't know about other girls, but I can. I always do.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, I'm not going to let you make trouble for Mary and Sydney with this romantic rubbish.

[Frank Morgan]

Excuse me. Tweety.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yeah.

[Frank Morgan]

Thought I'd come in for a look. I mean, book.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Doctor.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Tweety, you're mean and cruel and heartless.

[Dr. Tweedy]

No, I.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

You've ruined my life.

[Frank Morgan]

What's been going on here?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Nothing, Mr. Potts. She's just making a big fuss because she got kissed. You can't blame a man for kissing a pretty girl when he has an opportunity.

[Frank Morgan]

That's what I keep telling Mrs. Potts.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

That kiss was like a sheet of fire. And now he calls it rubbish.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Sweetie. Tweety. Oh, Mr. Potts, you certainly don't think. You wouldn't. I mean, I'm not the. So I. I don't. I don't. You do, don't you?

[Frank Morgan]

How was it, Tweety?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Mr. Potts, stop leering. I've got to catch that girl and keep her from talking.

[Sydney]

Hey, dad, it's worth the rush. Mr. Potts is going to announce our engagement in a few minutes.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yeah, yeah. Sitting. Did you see a Miss Culpepper come rushing out of the library? Or don't you remember her?

[Sydney]

Yes, I seem to remember something about her.

[Dr. Tweedy]

A blown fuse, perhaps?

[Sydney]

Yes, something like that. She isn't here tonight, is she? Yeah, I hope.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Uh huh. And feeling very talkative. It seems you're quite a kisser. Oh, she told you? Yes.

[Sydney]

What if she tells Mary?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Sydney, why do you think I've been chasing Ms. Culpepper?

[Sydney]

Dad, I don't like to pry into your business.

[Dr. Tweedy]

That is not the reason. Why did you kiss her anyway? I thought Mary kept you busy enough.

[Sydney]

I did it in a weak moment. She asked me to smell the perfume on her earlobes.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Oh dear.

[Sydney]

Then she turned out the lights, put her arms around my neck.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yeah.

[Sydney]

Which way did she go?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Never mind. You go find me. You go and find Mary. And don't stop dancing until your engagement is announced. Now, now, now, now, now, Ms. Culpepper, you. Don't you. Now you know you don't want to break up two young people who love each other.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Oh, yes, I Do.

[Dr. Tweedy]

There's absolutely no reason why you should be so unreasonable.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

I'm a woman.

[Dr. Tweedy]

I should have thought of that reason.

[Frank Morgan]

Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention, please? I wish to take this occasion to announce the formal engagement of my daughter, Mary to Dr. Tweedy's son, Sydney.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Oh, now my heart is broken in a million little bitty pieces.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Oh, but now. But Ms. Culpepper, please. Now don't stop crying. You're getting your shoulders all wet. What will people think?

[Frank Morgan]

I know what I'm thinking. Dr. Tweedy.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Oh, you. Colonel Jackson? Yes, I was just. Miss. This is Colonel Jackson. Colonel Jackson. Mrs. Copperfare. Papa Pepper.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Miss Georgia. Genevieve Culpepper.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yes, Georgia.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

I'm pleased to make your acquaintance, Colonel Jackson.

[Frank Morgan]

Why, a Southern belle.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yes, she ran.

[Frank Morgan]

Miss Georgia. May I say, your beauty is most distracting. Yes, your features are as delicate as a sweet magnolia bird. Shyly opening in the jasmine scented moonlight.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Here we go.

[Frank Morgan]

You remind me of a honeysuckle brasso and Spanish moss gracefully hanging from the cypress trees and swaying in the soft warm breeze.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Oh, dear.

[Frank Morgan]

I'm from the south, you know.

[Dr. Tweedy]

What a coincidence.

[Frank Morgan]

Dr. Tweedy, sir. What have you done to this delicate young flower?

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

I'll tell you what he's done. His son Sidney kissed me and now he's engaged to another woman.

[Frank Morgan]

Oh, Miss George, allow me to assume the protection of your honor.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Oh, Slush, a kiss doesn't mean anything.

[Frank Morgan]

Maybe not to a Yankee, sir.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

But.

[Frank Morgan]

Where Ms. Koppep and I come from, a kiss is either a proposal or an insult.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Oh, dear. To think that millions of women all over the world are being assaulted tonight.

[Frank Morgan]

Dr. Tweedy, sir, since Sydney is now engaged to Mary, I must consider this case nothing but an insult. Our demand satisfaction.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Sidney kissed her. That's already he's had a satisfaction.

[Frank Morgan]

Ask the Tweedy. Sir, you know exactly how I feel about women. When I catch a man being disrespectful to the fair sex, I have no recourse but to get my dueling pistol.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Very well. I'll shoot it out with you. But this time you can fix your own flat tire. Ms. Culpepper, surely there must be some other man that you could find interesting.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

Well, to be frank with you, the only real man I met since I've been here is the Colonel.

[Frank Morgan]

Well, thank you, ma'am. I'm your obedient servant, Ms. Georgia.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Genevieve Culpepper. You mean your cotton to the Colonel? Balls of fire.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

I find him mighty tantalizing.

[Dr. Tweedy]

Great scotch, sure enough. Hush my mouth. You're right. Honey child, the Colonel is a mighty handsome man. Not a little old Yankee like my son Sidney. You want an older man. And Sidney is so immature.

[Frank Morgan]

Dr. Tweedy said. I think you're going too far.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

I'm way ahead of Dr. Tweedy. Excuse me. I'm going to put on some more of my perfume. I'm saving every dance for you, Colonel. Don't go away.

[Frank Morgan]

Now I see what you've done. Dr. Tweedy, how am I going to get out of what you got me into?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Well, that's obvious. You said she was a delicate flower. She should bruise easily. You are gentle with her. Do the opposite. Caveman stuff.

[Frank Morgan]

You mean like Humphrey Bogart?

[Dr. Tweedy]

Yes, like Humphrey Bogart.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

I'm all ready, Colonel. Shall we dine?

[Frank Morgan]

Come here, sugar.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

What did you say?

[Frank Morgan]

I said, come here, sugar. I got a better place. Why waste that big old moon's time? Let's get to that convertible and start necking, baby.

[Georgia Genevieve Culpepper]

How dare you, Colonel Jackson. I thought you were a Southern gentleman. But I see you're nothing but a Yankee. Eager beaver. Good night.

[Frank Morgan]

Oh, farthing is such sweet sorrow.

[Dr. Tweedy]

You're right, Colonel. She was a delicate young flower. Now, let's see if we can get some beefsteak for that eye.

[Frank Morgan]

This is the United States Armed Forces Radio Service, the voice of information and education.

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