
The Fat Man 49-04-01 (168) Murder Wins The Draw
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A
There he goes into the drugstore. He's stepping on the scales. Weight, 241 pounds. Fortune danger.
B
The Fat man. Gambling at its best is a sucker's past time. And the schmo who makes a steady.
C
Diet of it ought to take a course in simple mathematics.
B
He's got a better chance of striking.
C
Oil in his own backyard than he.
B
Has of winning a sweepstakes.
C
And if he thinks he can out.
B
Guess a roulette ball, he's a real dreamer.
C
But the gentle gambles with someone else's.
B
Life is the biggest jump of all.
C
Because his IOUs are never marked paid.
B
In full until he gets a chair for murder. That's the fat man. A fast moving criminologist who dips the scales of £241. Brought to you by the Norwich Pharmacy, makers of Pepto the Fat man, starring J. Scott Smart. In tonight's adventure, Murder wins the draw. When a happy tourist goes to Central.
C
America, he usually runs into nothing more dangerous than. Than a good cup of coffee and a fried banana.
B
But with me, it's different.
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If there's trouble around, it always walks right up and pokes me in the eye. However, this particular form of trouble wasn't hard to look at.
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She had the kind of legacy in.
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The hosiery ads and a profile to match. But when she grabbed my arm in the airport and married a Yucatan, I had a hunch that although the mistake was hers, I was the one who.
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Lived to regret it.
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Darling.
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What?
D
Oh, angel.
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I was so worried you'd miss our plane. Have your bags checked, Alan. We don't have too much time.
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The name happens to be Runyon.
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Porter. Porter. Those suitcases wave a minute.
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Counter 7.
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The plane for Guatemala City.
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Now, wait a minute. I'm going to New Orleans.
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You're going to Guatemala City, dearest, with me. And here's your ticket.
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She pushed something into my hand and.
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Led me to a counter.
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When I opened my palm, I saw it was a roll of $50 bills.
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But it was the anguished look of terror on her face that stopped me.
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From brushing her off. Twenty minutes later, I was heading south for Guatemala City and wondering why. Okay.
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Okay, what?
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Let's have the gimmick.
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I'm afraid I owe you an apology. I've made a slight mistake.
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Well, don't let it worry you.
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I'm used to boarding planes that fly in the wrong direction. I like to take the long way home.
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How can you ever forgive me, Mr. Runyon?
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Let's dispense with the syrup, sweetheart.
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I'D prefer an explanation.
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I made a mistake. We'll let it go at that.
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You've been paid for your trouble.
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There was over $500 in that roll. I have nothing more to say, so leave me alone.
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She wasn't kidding. All the way to Guatemala she kept straight. And I could have gotten more conversation from a dummy. She was the first one out of her seat when we landed at the.
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Airport, and she'd finished with her baggage.
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Inspection by the time I reached the customs counter. But as the porter put my suitcase.
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On the counter next to her, she.
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Suddenly grabbed my arm again and went into the old refrain.
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Darling, this is where I came in.
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Oh, darling, we'll be late. Ask that customs agent to look at your suitcase.
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Say we're in a hurry.
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Once is enough, sweetheart. No encouragement.
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But, dearest, we have an appointment at the hotel.
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Tell, please, I'm looking for you.
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Oh, hello.
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Who's the fat guy?
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Helen, he's here to protect me.
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Don't hand me that. Get your bag.
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Alan, don't. You're hurting.
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My arms are bad.
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You'll keep out of it.
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Allan, please, please don't start any trouble. I'll come with you.
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All right, porter, grab that suitcase and let's get out of here. I reserved a room at the hotel Brand for you.
D
All right.
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All right, seor.
C
Huh?
B
Customs inspector. Senor, you will please open your suitcase. Oh. Oh, sure. Nothing in here but my personal thing. Is that silk, senor?
C
What's so funny?
B
The next time you buy a girdle, senor, you might try a larger size.
C
Wait a minute.
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Put your silk knife calendar. Exquisite. This is not my excuse case. There are no apologies necessary, senor. I'm happy to see you are wearing the new look. Stop killing yourself and give me an exit stamp.
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Chico, I'm taking those nylons back where they belong. I checked into the Hotel grand about half an hour later and gave the.
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Desk clerk a description of the gal who grabbed me at the airport.
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And it was now in possession of.
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My shirt and shorts.
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He gave me a room number, and.
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A little bellhop escorted me upstairs with.
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A running account of the natural wonders of Guatemala City.
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And the girl, senor?
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Now, we have so many beautiful girls.
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And Pedro can arrange for you to meet the best.
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Who's Pedro?
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At your service. This way.
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Let's go in the other direction.
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But Your room is 65.
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Right now I'm looking for 78.
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Well, that room is already occupied, senorano.
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And look, Pedro, don't argue. Lug that bag to 78.
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Whatever you say, senor.
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There it is, right across the hall.
A
See?
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There is no one inside, seor.
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You got a pass key, haven't you?
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But this is very irregular. How about this for a slightly? Senor, almost anything is regular. I have a key. Of course. There you are, Senor. The room, as I told you, is occupied.
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You're right, Pedro. It's occupied by a corpse.
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Thank you.
C
The corpse was a woman I'd never seen before.
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Quietly dressed and about 40 years of age.
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She was sitting in a locker, pinned against the back by the blade of.
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A three foot machete.
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The security police identified the woman by her tourist cards. Her name was Alice Vinson and her home was in Albuquerque, New Mexico.
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The motive wasn't petty theft because her.
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Cash was in her handbag.
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And one look at her prematurely age, not the too attractive face, convinced me.
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It couldn't have been a crime of jealousy. Along about 11, I tried to get some sleep. But I hadn't even got my shoes.
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Off when my phone started ringing. Yes?
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Mr. Runyon?
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You're speaking to him.
G
I hope I didn't wake you.
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No, no, not at all, sweetheart.
G
This is Helen. You remember, don't you?
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Oh, sure, I remember. Your one little number I'll never forget.
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I'm afraid there was a mix up at the airport.
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Yeah, a little switcheroo.
G
You've got my suitcase, Mr. Runyon, and I've got yours.
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I only wish I had your nerve.
D
What?
B
Did you check into room 78 at.
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The hotel grand tonight?
G
Why, yes, I know.
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They've got you lifted on the register.
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Baby, and so have the Guatemalan comp.
G
Well, I haven't done anything. Anyway, I've called you about something more important.
B
Really?
G
I want my suitcase back.
B
Well, come over and get it.
G
That. That's rather difficult right now. Can you come to me?
B
It'll be a pleasure. What's the address?
G
I'm calling from a public booth. I'll pick you up on the corner of 12th and Avenida Marcos in 15 minutes. Is that convenient?
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Very.
G
And you'll have the suitcase with you.
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Tucked right under my chubby little arm.
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Oh, then I'll see you in 15 minutes, Mr. Runyon. And thank you ever so much for being so obliging.
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All right, all right.
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Keep the shirt on.
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Well.
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Yes, I would like to talk to you, senor. Alone.
C
She couldn't have been more than five.
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Feet tall, with the delicate features of a doll. Her voice was like sugar cane, and.
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When she smiled, reminded you of the Caribbean moon. A nickel plated short barrel.38 revolver in.
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One of her neatly manicured hands completed the picture.
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Sit down, senor.
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Thanks.
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And please don't move.
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It would be rude of me to blow your veins out.
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No.
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To say nothing of the inconvenience.
A
Where is the suitcase?
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What suitcase?
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The one you will produce for me before I kill you.
E
Oh.
C
Oh, that one.
D
I have no time for the stalls. And your suitcase.
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Portables in that closet.
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Yes.
D
And now, seniors, if you will turn.
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Around and face the wall.
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What are we playing?
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Crossing the corner?
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Turn signals.
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Look, Just got here.
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As I said before, she couldn't have.
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Been over 5ft tall, and she was as delicate as a doll.
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But when she brought the butt of.
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That rod down on the back of my skull, it was like playing Patty cake with a pile driver. I must have been out for half an hour. And when I started to come around, my head seemed to be rattling like.
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A couple of dice cubes.
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But as my eyes slowly came into.
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Focus, the dice cubes changed to footsteps.
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And I realized that someone was casing my room. When I opened one eye, I could spot his number 12 shoes.
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As they passed back and forth 6 inches from my nose.
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I bided my time until my strength started flowing back. Then, as he passed me once more.
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I reached out and grabbed his ankle.
G
Hey, easy.
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Nurse. Calling me. Just as soon as I check your pockets.
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Quiet.
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Sweetheart, what do you think you're doing at home? I said quiet. Hey, that's better.
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Now get up and talk this thing over.
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Making a big mistake.
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Yeah, sure, I know.
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Everybody seems to be making mistakes in.
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This part of the world. Where's Helen?
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I don't know who you mean.
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You're the man who met her at the airport. The guy she called Allen. My name is Runyon, and I'm in.
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A very bad mood, so start making some sense.
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Okay, okay. I only came here to get our suitcase. You said you delivered. You never showed up.
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Well, I'm all ready to keep that appointment.
F
Now, where's the bag?
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Don't tell me you didn't find it.
F
Stop conning me, Runyon. This is no laughing matter.
B
Alice, Vincent, we all know that feeling.
H
You finally managed to get away on vacation, and the worrying starts Will that bogus Beware of dog sign keep your home safe? What about that fake camera you set up? And will someone finally find your old hide and key rock? That's where ADT comes in, all that stuff.
D
It's safe.
H
Ish. It seems fine when you don't really think about it. But you know, it truly doesn't work. Instead, ADT provides security solutions that keep you actually safe, giving you real peace of mind. Because vacation is supposed to be, you know, relaxing. Don't settle for safe.ish. visit ADT.com today to learn more.
I
Progressive knows we all create validation.
D
Girl, you are not 37.
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I would have guessed 27.
H
You guys are too sweet.
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Sure. Dewy skin. Terrific.
H
Is something. Something wrong, Ned?
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Why would you ask?
H
Just because.
I
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C
Testifying to that along about the time.
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Someone stuck a machete in her chest.
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Quiet.
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You didn't know what I know.
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Look, Runyon, is that suitcase really gone?
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How do you think I collected this.
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Lump on my skull?
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She got here ahead of you.
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Lying little tramp. She crushed me again.
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What makes that suitcase so valuable, Alan?
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That's my business. But if you want to play ball, I'll make it worth your while. Are you open to a proposition?
C
We'll talk it over on the way.
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To the security police.
F
I'll be a staff running. You got nothing on me. The only thing you can hold me for is room breaking.
B
That all that interests you? Frankly, no. I'm looking for bigger fish to fry.
F
All right, here's your chance. I played along with that double crossing female. One stomping. She's open for a murder rap. I don't want any part of her.
B
What's your proposition, mister?
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It involves a quarter of a million bucks.
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A lot of zeros.
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125 grand for each of us. Runyon the idealian, pal.
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Start shuffling the cards.
F
Okay, then. Follow me.
B
Well, this is a mighty peculiar fat man case. Now let's catch up with the fat man.
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Guatemala City at night is one of the quietest places in the world. The streets are dark and lonely, and.
B
You can count the strollers, if any.
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On the fingers of one hand. I didn't cut this loudmouth island guy any further than I could see him. And when he stepped into the shadows of an open doorway, I almost jumped him. But then I saw him bend over.
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A figure huddled on the step.
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The old woman says Helen hasn't come back yet.
C
You suppose she ran out on you?
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No, she's got to come back. I got her passport and tourist cards. She can't leave this country without them.
B
You still haven't told me what's inside that suitcase.
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Why should I tell you? So you can grab hold of it yourself and crush me, too? You work with me and we'll split. 50. 50. That's the deal.
B
Okay.
C
What's next on the list?
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I'm waiting here for Helen. I got a room on the second floor.
B
I thought you stopped at the Grand.
F
Sometimes it doesn't hurt to have more than one address. Tell you what. When you go back to your hotel room, and I'll call you when she gets here. I can handle this gal alone.
C
And let you run out on me?
F
Well, you shouldn't be so suspicious. Would I have told you this much if I wasn't on the level?
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When will I hear from you?
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The minute Helen showed.
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Okay, Alan.
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I'll be waiting for your call.
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I could almost feel his wiseacre grin on the nape of my neck as I turned and walked away. But that grin would have turned a little sour if he could have read my mind.
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The lobby was empty when I reached.
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The hotel, but I found the boy.
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I was looking for asleep in a chair near the vacant bar. Pedro. Pedro. Pedro, wake up.
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Oh, senor. What can I do for you?
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I'm looking for company.
E
Oh, a girl to talk to, senor.
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To dance with.
B
What do you got to offer?
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Guatemala is full of lovely women. Lolita, Conchita, Chita, Malita.
D
I know them all.
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The gal I'm looking for is about 5ft tall. She wears her hair in a bun.
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On the back of her neck, and.
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She'S very easy on the eyes.
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Ah, you Aussie girls are easy on the eyes, seor.
B
This one's got a small birth mark on her cheek.
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Looks like a triangle.
E
That would be Lolita. You have picked me most beautiful in the city.
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Can I meet her?
B
Where?
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At the Club Cantale nightclub. It's a place where you can dance for 10 centavos.
C
Oh, she works there, huh?
E
See, Lolita is very popular with the boys.
B
Yes, she would be, with her lovely disposition, you know.
E
What is the Club Cantale?
C
No.
B
Suppose you trot along with me, Pedro, and introduce us.
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The Club Cantale was a tough little joint in the seedier part of town. The kind of place that supplied dance.
B
Hostesses for the customers. Half a dozen girls were lined up.
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At the bar when Pedro and I.
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Walked in and I recognized the cutie who clipped me.
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I turned my back and sat down at a table.
B
As Pedro went over to talk to her.
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He said, a Few words, then brought her over to where I was sitting.
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I turned around just as she reached the table. And you could have knocked her over.
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With an eyebrow pencil. Hello, Lolita.
B
Don't you recognize me?
D
No.
C
Take a look at this lump on my head.
B
It might refresh your memory. You know each other, senor? And how. You can go back to your snooze now, Pedro. I'll carry on from here, senor.
E
Before I leave, I have some lottery tickets. All very good numbers, senor. I tell them as a sideline. No.
C
So does everyone else in Central America. Now, I'm not playing the lottery.
B
Lottery. Pedro, Take this five and beat it.
E
Elita, this is.
B
Now, wait a minute, Pedro. Leave that ticket on the table. Here. Keep the change. What's the matter, Lolita?
D
Nothing.
B
This lottery ticket bother you?
D
What do you want?
B
I want to know where the suitcase is and why you grabbed it.
D
I don't know what you're talking about.
B
About Lolita. I understand the tourist trade is appreciated here in Guatemala. I don't think the cops would like it if I told them you ran around slugging their better customers with revolver butts.
C
Oh, and there's also a little matter of murder.
B
Lolita.
D
Murder.
B
Now, it's funny how that word gets a double take from everyone. Were you an innocent bystander, too?
D
They're not. I will make you a proposition.
B
Go right ahead.
C
I've been getting them all night long.
D
How would you like to share a fortune with Lolita?
B
Between you and this Alan character? I'm getting to be a wealthy guy, Alan. Skip it and keep talking.
D
Do you know what was in that suitcase I took from your room?
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I didn't up to now, but I.
B
Think I can guess it. Was it a lottery ticket? Lolita.
D
The winning number for the Grand National. 250,000 quetzales, but gone. She stole it.
B
Helen, who owned the ticket first?
D
This I do not know.
C
Then how did you find out about it?
D
In the hotel lobby. I hear that blonde girl on the tall gringo top. He squeezed her arm and she said the ticket is in her suitcase. Then she finds out the suitcase is not hers. The one she has is. Mrs. Leave the hotel to go back to the airport for the bag. Five minutes later, you walk in. I see you have a bag that looks like the other one. And I hear her say something about the apartment.
B
So you decided to climb on the bandwagon yourself.
D
This is the truth, Senior Honor.
B
Where's the suitcase now?
D
In my dressing room. But something is wrong. I searched for an hour and I do not find the ticket.
B
Maybe you didn't look for it in the right places. Well, this time you'll get some help from me. If her story was straight, I was.
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Beginning to get an idea of how.
B
The late Alice Vincent was next up in it.
C
All I had to do now is to make sure I didn't walk right into what Alice. Then Lolita's dressing room was in back of the club. And when we stepped inside, we ran into an unexpected guest.
B
Was Helen, the girl the taking ways as she was bending over the leather suitcase with a pen knife in her hand.
D
What were you doing in my room?
A
I was just waiting to talk to you.
D
You have no right to search my suitcase.
A
Your suitcase? It happens to belong to me a little tree.
D
Don't you, Corny?
B
Take it easy, girls. Take it easy. The party's young yet.
A
I should have known you were working with her. You're as big a crook as she is.
B
You mind if I see what you just cut out of that suitcase lining?
A
I don't know what you mean.
D
She has a ticket. It was in the lining and she has it in her hand.
C
Turn it over, Alan.
A
Not a chance.
B
You stole that winning ticket from Alice Vincent.
A
Well, she can't prove it. It's not registered in her name. Whoever turns it in collects the money. And I'm the one who's turning it in.
B
You're right about one thing. Alice Vincent can't prove it. She's dead.
D
What? Dave.
B
And if you try to turn that ticket in, baby, you'll get the squeeze for her murder.
A
You're just bluffing me. I didn't kill her. She took me on as a traveling companion in New York. When I left her a couple of days ago in Merida, she was alive.
B
You're in hot water right after your pretty neck, Helen, and it's beginning to boil.
A
All right, I'll make you a proposition, Runyon.
C
Hold your hats, boys.
A
We'll split on this ticket. 50.
E
50.
A
We don't have to fight about it. We can both be rich.
D
And what about me?
A
You, you can drop dead in your face.
B
Have a good time, girls. And remember, no fighting. In the clinches, they were scratching their initials in each other's skin as I.
C
Closed the door behind me holding the lottery ticket Helena dropped when Lolita opened.
B
With her first right cross. Fifteen minutes later, I was climbing the.
C
Stairs to Alan's furnished room where I.
B
Found him pacing the floor like a hungry coyote.
F
You didn't come back yet, Runyon.
C
All right, sweetheart. I found her.
F
You Did.
C
Yeah.
B
I've got the lottery ticket. You was. Okay, G. Let me have it. Not so fast. I'm entitled to a little explanation in.
C
As much as I'm an active partner.
F
What kind of an explanation do you want? Helen stole that ticket. She was supposed to split with me, but she ducked out the Yucatan.
B
That's why she grabbed me at the airport. She thought you might follow her.
F
I wasn't even there when she left.
C
I know that.
B
You'd left for Guatemala on Alice Vincent trail. She was going back to collect on her winning ticket. And she probably never even knew your girlfriend Helen had grabbed it until she.
C
Got to Guatemala City.
F
You need that ticket running. You're wasting time.
C
I'm in no hurry.
B
Listen to the rest of my story. Interesting. You didn't know that Helen had stolen the ticket either.
C
Until you maneuvered Alice Vincent into that.
B
Hotel room and jabbed her with a machete.
F
Wait a second.
B
Then you caught on, and you decided to wait at the airport to grab your ex partner. You knew she had to get here.
C
Sometime to collect her dough.
F
You must be nuts, Runyon. I didn't murder Vincent.
C
No?
B
No. Then who did?
F
Helen, naturally.
B
But she couldn't. She never even came up to her hotel room. You both found out she had the long suitcase in the lobby. You went back to the airport. I found the body before she could have returned.
F
And what does that add up to?
B
It adds up to this, sonny. Alice Vinson was murdered before your gal friend even landed here. She was stabbed in a room which you'd reserved in Helen's name. Helen didn't have to kill for that ticket, mister. She already had it. But you didn't know that.
C
So you knocked off Alice Vincent and then found out.
B
You only wasted a lot of time.
F
What are you trying to do, Grab that money for yourself?
B
I'm turning that lottery ticket over to the government, sweetheart. And from there it goes to Alex Vincent's estate. Are you crazy?
E
I thought you said we were partners.
B
I don't hold hands with a guy who's three feet from a Guatemalan firing squad.
F
You're the last one who's gonna cross me running.
B
You ought to know better than to.
C
Draw on a man with his hand in his pocket. But you were never too lucky when.
B
It came to a draw. In any case, mister, the number you picked on the last one is up while the fat man rests up.
F
After that.
Original Air Date: September 4, 2025
Host: Harold's Old Time Radio
This episode presents a complete broadcast of “The Fat Man,” a classic detective drama from radio’s Golden Age. In tonight’s mystery, “Murder Wins The Draw,” detective Runyon (“The Fat Man”) finds himself unwittingly drawn into an international web of murder, deception, and greed when a beautiful stranger thrusts a wad of cash and a ticket to Guatemala City into his hand. The case centers around a seemingly innocuous suitcase and a lottery ticket worth a fortune—a ticket someone was willing to commit murder to obtain.
The dialog is snappy noir, filled with wisecracks, hard-boiled metaphors, and sharp exchanges. The Fat Man (Runyon) delivers narration and dialogue with world-weary irony, while the supporting cast—Helen, Lolita, Alan—alternate between desperation, flirtation, and menace.
“Murder Wins The Draw” exemplifies the intrigue and atmosphere of Golden Age radio detective drama: a twisting plot of mistaken identities, betrayals, a suitcase switch, femme fatales, and a hero whose wit is as sharp as his instincts. The episode is packed with memorable lines and a satisfying unraveling of motive and murder—all resolved with the Fat Man’s classic, reluctant heroism.