The New Adventures of Nero Wolfe 50-12-08 (08) The Impolite Corpse

Summary

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Podcast Summary

Harold's Old Time Radio

Episode: The New Adventures of Nero Wolfe – "The Impolite Corpse" (original air date: December 8, 1950)
Release Date: January 17, 2026
Host: Harold's Old Time Radio

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Episode Overview

This episode features the classic Golden Age radio mystery "The Impolite Corpse," part of The New Adventures of Nero Wolfe. Detective Nero Wolfe and his assistant Archie Goodwin tackle the murder of Walter Channing, a disliked advertising executive found shot dead at his desk. Wolfe must unravel a tangle of motives and misdirection to identify the true culprit among a cast of suspects with grudges and secrets.

The tone is witty and sharp, driven by the banter between Nero Wolfe, Archie, and their suspects—a blend of classic detective drama and clever dialogue.

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Key Plot Points and Discussions

1. The Murder Setup (00:32 - 07:56)

• Characters Introduced:

  • Archie Goodwin (Wolfe’s witty assistant) answers a request from Brenda Barclay.
  • Walter Channing (the victim) is dictating memos, creating tension with his staff and secretary (Brenda).
  • Conflict surfaces: Channing is harsh, especially toward Tom Bennett and Brenda; there's bad blood with several employees.
  • Several staff members, including Channing's wife Doris, are present around the time of his death.

• Critical Clue:

  • Channing is found shot at his desk, apparently without a struggle, and the gun is found ten feet away.
  • Powder burns indicate close-range shooting.
  • Early suspicion of suicide, but circumstances don’t fit.

• Notable Quote:

  • Channing, after a harsh exchange with Brenda:
    “You were flashy when I met you. You’re getting flashier. That means cheaper... You’re labeling yourself like a sandwich wagon.” (05:43, Walter Channing)

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2. The Investigation Begins (07:56 - 13:52)

• Brenda Barclay consults Wolfe, fearing she’ll be suspected because of her past with Channing.

• Inspector Kramer and the police are stumped; Archie starts interviewing agency employees:

  • Tom Bennett (resentful employee):
    “If you want my opinion as one employee out of 150, whoever killed Walter Channing did the rest of us a favor.” (09:57, Bennett)
  • Amy Long (Meelik’s secretary) suggests jealousy motives.
  • Kelly the Shoeshine Boy and Abe Jackson the night porter both discovered the body.

• Key Fact:

  • Every person present had a reason to hate Channing.

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3. Wolfe’s Analysis and Key Clues (13:52 - 17:52)

• Archie brings back details:

  • Ink stain found on Channing’s trouser cuff; attempts made to clean it with chemicals (carbon tetrachloride and perchloroethylene).
  • Spot on carpet near desk analyzed—found to be a powdered aniline dye.
  • Wolfe deconstructs theories and insists on facts.

• Dialogue Highlight:

  • Archie:
    “My chemical set isn’t working so good, boss.” (15:21, Archie)
  • Wolfe:
    “Archie, I want two things … suggest to Inspector Kramer that he have the stain analyzed … be around him when the information arrives.” (15:27, Wolfe)

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4. The Gathering and Final Confrontation (17:52 - 27:15)

• Brenda lures Wolfe to Channing’s office under false pretenses (“He’s in danger”), prompting Wolfe to gather all suspects for a classic “everyone in the room” reveal.

• Wolfe reconstructs the crime:

  • Re-enacts how the murderer could approach Channing without raising alarm: Only someone whom Channing trusted enough to allow near his desk, and who would commonly kneel—like a shoeshine boy—or someone with a reason to kneel, such as cleaning his trouser cuff.
  • Key deduction: The killer knelt in front of Channing under a pretense and shot him point-blank.

• Red Herrings:

  • At first, suspicion falls on Kelly the shoeshine, as the memo Channing dictated (eliminating daily shoe shines) would mean the loss of Kelly’s livelihood.
  • Crucial twist: Wolfe realizes the memo about eliminating shoe shines was sent after the murder, as part of a frame job.

• Revelation:

  • The chemicals (used to clean the trouser cuff) and dye (from a woman’s suede shoe) point to Brenda Barclay.
  • Wolfe exposes that Brenda both cleaned Channing’s cuff and planted evidence to incriminate Kelly, orchestrating the crime and its cover-up.

• Key Quotes:

  • Wolfe, reflecting on the sanctity of a man’s desk:
    “Sanctity of desk hood... so long as a man sits at his desk, he enjoys a curious area of privacy. He is remarkably safe from intrusion.” (23:08, Wolfe)
  • Wolfe’s denouement:
    “Three questions, Archie, with one answer. That spells the name of the murderess. Our own client. Brenda Barclay.” (26:56, Wolfe)

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5. Aftermath and Wrap-up (27:15 - 27:53)

• Archie reflects on the case, jesting about troubles with blondes, as Wolfe returns to his beer.
• Wolfe remains characteristically unemotional and focused on routine:
  “Phooey. Hand me a can of beer. However, you do have the evening off.” (27:33, Wolfe)

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Memorable Moments & Quotes

• Nero Wolfe’s wit:
  “I never take a corpse for a client.” (01:05, Wolfe)
• Archie’s observations:
  “Those vest buttons won’t stand the strain.” (12:34, Archie)
• Dramatic twist:
  “The killer, he or she is present here. Now be quiet, everyone.” (22:34, Wolfe)
• The final reveal:
  “It spells the name of the murderess. Our own client. Brenda Barclay.” (26:56, Wolfe)

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Important Segment Timestamps

• 00:32 – 07:56 – Setup and murder of Walter Channing
• 07:56 – 13:52 – Brenda seeks Wolfe’s help; interviews with staff
• 13:52 – 17:52 – Wolfe and Archie uncover chemical clues
• 17:52 – 21:02 – The staged danger; Wolfe gathers all suspects
• 21:02 – 27:15 – Wolfe’s step-by-step reveal and confrontation
• 27:15 – End – Aftermath; Archie and Wolfe share a final exchange

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Summary

This episode presents a textbook Nero Wolfe mystery: a murder in an insular business setting, a bevy of grudges, and Wolfe’s insistence on evidence over speculation. Through a mix of chemical clues, psychological insight (notably Wolfe's principle of “desk hood”), and classic misdirection, the case unravels to reveal not the obvious suspect but the one who attempted to frame another—Brenda Barclay.

Listeners are treated to sharp dialogue, dry humor, classic radio acting, and a satisfying deduction that exemplifies the era’s golden radio dramas.

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Transcript

[A]

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[B]

Ladies and gentlemen, that phone bell means adventure. Hello? Hello? The young man answering the phone is Archie Goodwin. And the mountain of a man engaged in deep thought in the oversized armchair is Nero Wolf. What was that? Somebody's gonna be murdered who has no manners. Well, what do you want Nero Wolf to do? Teach him manners. Oh, hold on. Mr. Wolfe.

[C]

Yes, Archie?

[B]

We've got a prospective client. In case someone she knows gets murdered, she'd like you to do something about it.

[C]

Very well. However, advise her.

[B]

Yes?

[C]

Not to get murdered herself. I never take a corpse for a client.

[B]

Greatest detective in the world. Yes, Archie is so right. He is the greatest detective in the world and the fattest and the least energetic. He's Nero Wolf. Created by Rex Stout and brought to you over this NBC network in a new series of Adventures by Mr. Sydney Greenstreet. Tonight, it's the case of the Impolite Corpse. It began on a certain night at 8:40 when Walter Channing, an advertising executive, was dictating in his office to his charming secretary, Brenda Barclay.

[D]

Brenda, take a memo.

[E]

Yes, Mr. Channing.

[D]

This is to be mimeographed and sent to the entire staff.

[E]

The entire staff? Yes, sir.

[D]

Notice effective at once, one hour. Lunch periods will be strictly enforced. Employees will post time of departure and time of return. Yes, what is it, Mr. Channing? Bennett, I'm busy. Well, I. I've got to see you, Mr. Channing, about this afternoon. This afternoon was unfortunate, Bennett, but it happened. I lost my temper, I'm sorry. So am I. Mr. Channing.

[C]

I've been with the firm 14 years and I.

[D]

Well, because a man blows up once in 14 years.

[E]

Mr. Channing's office.

[D]

Oh. You've got to reconsider, that's all. Mr. Channing. I never reconsider. Bennett, it's your wife. But Mr. Channing, that. Bennett, it won't be all. You can't wipe out 14 years of a man's life.

[C]

Even you can't do that. Channing.

[E]

It'S Mrs. Channing on the phone.

[D]

Oh, hello. You're where? That's in this building? Since when has Dr. Ellis kept evening office hours? I told you, there's nothing wrong with you. No, I can't. I don't know when I'll be through. And I don't want you hanging around up here. Well, take a cab or walk. I don't care what you do.

[B]

What?

[D]

I can't understand you. What?

[B]

What?

[D]

Goodbye, Doris. Where was I?

[B]

Walter. Yes?

[E]

You are going to reconsider about Tom Bennett, aren't you?

[D]

Bennett was insolent this afternoon. I won't tolerate insolence.

[B]

Yes.

[D]

Shine, Mr. Churning. Shine. No. What's he doing down here this time of night?

[E]

Half the staff's working overtime. Kerry was an enterprising shoeshine boy. Might have missed someone on his rounds this afternoon. Walter, A bar. Tom Bennett.

[D]

Forget Bennett.

[E]

Look. Do you upset the ink?

[D]

Well, quick, blot the stuff.

[E]

Yes, of course. Did any spill on you?

[D]

Spot my trouser cuff? Lucky you didn't get in the carpet.

[E]

Walter, about Tom Bennett.

[D]

I told you to forget Bennett.

[E]

All right, Walter, all right.

[D]

Though maybe you shouldn't. Maybe you'd be better off to use him as a model.

[E]

A model?

[D]

If he knows he's not wanted around here, he'll have the self respect to get out.

[E]

Meaning?

[D]

Well, you've known for a long time you're not wanted and you're still here.

[E]

How you'd like to fire me.

[D]

Denying that would be silly.

[E]

I've been with this firm 15 years. In January, employees get a bonus of stock shares after 15 years service. That's what I'm waiting for and you know it.

[D]

Suppose we get back to that memorandum.

[E]

You'd like to get me out before I collect those shares, wouldn't you?

[D]

I said let's get on with the memo.

[E]

You'd be petty enough to do it.

[D]

Too, if you knew how there may be a way.

[E]

There isn't and you know it. I'm too careful. You can't fire me without cause. And I've given you no cause, Walter. Nothing you can possibly dictate. One of your vicious little memorandums about.

[D]

Don't try my patience too far, Brenda.

[E]

Walter, this can't be us talking like this. You and me hating each other.

[D]

I find it remarkable there ever was anything between us except hate. Walter, I mean it. Look at you. You were flashy when I met you. You're getting flashier. That means cheaper. Brenda, stop it. Too much lipstick, too much rouge, hair too bright, dress too tight. You're trying too hard, Brenda. You're labeling yourself like a sound wagon. I wonder what it Is that stops.

[E]

Me from killing you?

[D]

Cowardice, of course. Now, when you've stopped sniveling, we'll get on with a memorandum. You ready? Yes, I'm ready. Notice. In the interest of economy and efficiency, junior executives will confer in the conference room, not in private offices. Mid afternoon coffee and personal phone calls and daily shoe shines will be eliminated.

[C]

Your name is Barclay. Brenda barclay. Very well, Miss Barkley. What can I do for you, Mr. Wolfe?

[E]

I. I don't know how to begin.

[B]

Maybe I can make this easier all around by briefing Mr. Wolfe on the Walter Channing case. Hey, that's funny. What? Violet eyes. I always thought there was something the poets made up.

[C]

Archie.

[B]

Huh? Oh, the ch. The Channing case. Yes.

[C]

One moment, Ms. Barkley. Look this way, please. To me, an eye is functional, object found. Mammals, birds, fish, potatoes and horticulture.

[B]

Thank you.

[C]

Go on, Archie.

[B]

Walter Channing was the boy wonder of advertising at 33, executive vice president of Winslow, Hart Straightmeyer. Just 24 hours ago, they found him at his desk, shot through the heart.

[C]

They? Who is they?

[B]

A night porter and a shoeshine boy. Is that right?

[E]

Yes.

[B]

He'd been dead about an hour. The bullet went through Channing, his desk chair, and lodged in the windowsill behind him. Police thought at first it was suicide. The gun.38. Found it on the floor 10ft away. No fingerprints anyhow. No, clear ones.

[C]

Seldom are on a gun. But you say suicide was suspected. Why? The gun was 10ft from the body.

[E]

It was the. The smudges.

[D]

Smudges?

[B]

Powder burns. According to the papers, he was sitting at his desk. There were no signs of a struggle. The gun was held against his chest and fired.

[E]

But it wasn't suicide, Mr. Wolfe. Walter Channing would never have killed himself.

[B]

The police have already decided that. Finally. According to the evening papers.

[C]

And I presume you, Ms. Barclay, are a suspect?

[E]

No, not yet.

[D]

But you expect to be.

[C]

That's why you came to me.

[E]

When the police talked to her, I. Doris, his wife. I've been Walter Channing's secretary for eight years. At one time, we. We thought we were in love.

[C]

Mrs. Channing was aware of this?

[E]

Yes. Oh, it was a long time ago.

[B]

It was over.

[E]

It was finished a long time ago. But she never believed that. Neither did Alan.

[B]

Alan who?

[E]

Alan Melick, head of the media department at the agency. We were going to be married when I. When Walter and I.

[C]

Decided you were in love, Ms. Barkley, who finally decided you were? Not you or Mr. Channing?

[B]

He did. I see.

[C]

Mr. Meelik believes you did not share this change of heart?

[E]

Yes. Oh, he's such a fool.

[C]

I dare say you fear Mrs. Channing or Mr. Melick or both will reveal the ill fated romance.

[E]

You know what the papers will make of it, what the police will try to make of it.

[C]

Ms. Barkey, did you kill Channing?

[E]

No. Oh no, I swear I didn't. Oh Mr. Wolf, I didn't.

[C]

Please, for heaven's sake, no tears. Archie, put her in a cab.

[B]

Yes, sir.

[C]

Then come up to the plant room. There are some things I want you to execute for me.

[D]

Yes, sir. Women.

[C]

Bah.

[F]

Yes. Ms. Goodwill. I'm Ib Jackson, a night porter. It was working late that night. Mr. Channing, his secretary, Mr. Bennett, Mr. Mealik and his secretary. About 10:30 I met the shoe shine Kelly on Mr. Channing's floor. Was a light burning in Channing's place. We went in to turn it off, Kelly and me. And there he was sitting at his desk, a hole as big in his chest.

[B]

Tell me, Mr. Bennett, did Channing have any enemies in the agency?

[C]

Channing was a slave driver, Mr. Goodman. The girls hated him, the men were afraid of him.

[D]

He'd send out memos like this one around. Hey, take a look at it. It's typical.

[C]

No coffee, no shoeshines, no office conferences.

[D]

If you want my opinion as one employee out of 150, whoever killed Walter Channing did the rest of us a favor.

[B]

You're Amy Long, secretary to Alan Mealik. Now what can you do?

[E]

I can tell you plenty. How she jilted Mr. Mealy, took up with Mr. Channing, got thrown over by him. I wouldn't go so far as to say Brenda Barkley would murder anyone. But if she did, Walter Channing would be one a.

[B]

Channing get his shoes shined by you.

[D]

Take all the agency men.

[B]

Sir.

[D]

You know it was Jackson and me found him. Everyone else had gone and left himself poor soul, sitting at his desk dead.

[C]

This specimen, a minimus tree orchid. Beautiful, isn't it? Mrs. Channing. Mr. Miller.

[E]

I could never quite like orchids. They have no smell, you know.

[F]

It's pretty all right, but tulips are more in my line, Mr. Wolf.

[C]

Tulips, Mr. Mealy.

[F]

I had to stand of emperors this spring.

[C]

Emperors. Come in, Archie. Emperors, Mr. Mealy.

[F]

That's the name of a tulip, Mr. Wolf.

[C]

A peasant flower. I've heard of it, of course. Archie. Mrs. Channing, Mr. Medick, my assistant, Mr. Goodwin, Mr. Goodbye.

[B]

Didn't know you had company.

[E]

Mr. Woolf asks us here to explain why Brenda Barclay is Worried.

[C]

And you have both agreed to respect her position.

[F]

Brenda ought to know I'd never tell the police anything to get her into trouble.

[B]

Phooey, sir. He said Phooey, Mr. Meelik. Meaning? He doubts what you say and does not admit your right to say it.

[C]

Archie. Mr. Meelik, you say you would never intentionally inform on Ms. Barclay.

[F]

Certainly not.

[C]

The tongue slips, sir. We would expect you to guard yours.

[E]

What do you think what I started to say? You asked us here because Brenda barclay is your client. I despise Ms. Barclay, everyone knows that and why. But I wouldn't stoop to implicating her in murder.

[C]

You believe her innocent then, Mrs. Channing?

[E]

I believe she lacks the gumption to pull a trigger. Poison I wouldn't put past her at all. Mr. Melick, would you be kind enough to see me home?

[F]

Of course, Mrs. Channing. Good day, Mr. Wolfe.

[C]

Good day.

[F]

And Mr. Goodwin.

[C]

You have, I suppose, an exhaustive report from me. Archie.

[B]

Seven pages of notes.

[C]

Save them and get me a bottle of beer.

[B]

You're in a rosy mood. What happened?

[C]

I said I would like a bottle of beer.

[B]

No, you wouldn't.

[C]

Archie, you better don't puff up about it.

[B]

Those vest buttons won't stand the strain. I can't get you a bottle of beer.

[D]

Why not?

[B]

You ordered me to hold you to four a day.

[C]

I rescind the order.

[B]

You also ordered me not to let you rescind the order. What's the matter with you anyhow?

[C]

I have had to entertain two very dull people too long.

[B]

Both those dull people are prime suspects. Mrs. Channing is a woman scorned. Melek lost his girl to the guy who was killed.

[C]

I can't blame her for throwing him over. Archie, the man grows tulips.

[E]

What Tulips?

[C]

Well, give me a report.

[A]

My amex blue cash everyday card is my go to accessory. When I shop, I can earn 3% cash back on U. S. Online retail purchases. Try on the blue cash everyday card. Learn more at americanexpress.com explore-bce terms and cash back cap apply.

[B]

I checked the agency, everybody who was working down there the night of the murder. Also, I dropped in on inspector Kramer at homicide. Also, I visited the morgue.

[C]

Why the morgue?

[B]

Because if I hadn't, you'd have said why not the morgue?

[C]

Go on.

[B]

I drew a blank there. Kramer. Let me look at the clothes channing was wearing. There was an ink stain on the left trouser cuff, an ink stain and a hole through his shirt front with plenty of powder smudge. Like the paper said, he was shot with a.38 at point blank range.

[D]

Sitting down an impolite corpse.

[B]

What?

[C]

Discourteous. He didn't rise to meet his matter. That is most significant, Archie.

[B]

I know. I've got a theory about this case.

[C]

No theories. Facts, if you please.

[B]

But Look. Channing owned a.38. That's a fact. It's disappeared. That's another fact. The murder gun was a.38 with the numbers filed off. And it could be Channing's own gun.

[C]

Thereby proving what, Archie?

[B]

That his wife had access to it.

[C]

Your theory involves Mrs. Channing then?

[B]

And balik. She decides her husband is less trouble to her dead than alive.

[C]

A regrettable tendency of wives. Have you noticed?

[B]

And she sells melik on the idea. Now, that wouldn't be hard. They figured to make it look like suicide. But meelik loses his head and runs. Drops the gun on his way out.

[D]

And.

[B]

You don't buy it.

[C]

Enough of theories. The facts, Archie, out of your notebook.

[B]

One, nine people were on the scene that night working late for one reason or another.

[C]

Mrs. Channing tells me he was visiting a doctor's office in the same building.

[D]

By the way.

[B]

Two, every one of those people hated Channing. Three is a sample of why he wasn't popular. Memorandum dictated the night he was killed. The staff got it the next morning.

[C]

A whip cracker, Mr. Channing.

[B]

Fact four, the ink stain in this trouser cup was partly rubbed out.

[C]

With what?

[B]

Cleaner of some kind. I didn't get brand. Fact five, There's a spot on the carpet near Channing's chair.

[C]

Spot of what? Ink. Blood.

[B]

Looks like ink.

[E]

It looks like ink?

[B]

Well, I didn't analyze it on the spur of the moment. My chemical set isn't working so good, boss.

[C]

Archie, I want two things.

[B]

Yes, sir.

[C]

Get over to headquarters. The police have Channing's trousers. Suggest to inspector Kramer that he have the stain analyzed. Suggest also that the spot on the carpet be analyzed at the same time. Be around him when the information arrives.

[B]

This is be kind to the police week.

[C]

Phooey. I never have sought to beat the police on matters of fact. Only on interpretation.

[D]

Deduction.

[C]

Get going. Oh, and Archie.

[B]

Yes?

[C]

When you return, I should discourse upon the sanctity of desk hood.

[B]

The sanctity of what hood?

[C]

Desk hood. Now be off with you. And please remember, you're tracking a murderer. Don't stub your toe.

[F]

Good one. The thing on the carpet was a dye of some kind.

[B]

Dye, huh? How long will it take the lab to give you the analysis on It, Inspector.

[F]

Oh, not very long. I've got the report on what was used on the trouser cuff right now, though.

[D]

And they found traces of carbon tetrachloride.

[B]

Wait a minute. This goes in the notebook. K. Carbon tetrachloride and something else.

[F]

Goodwin, what's Wolf Afton?

[B]

Interpretations was what he said, Inspector. You object? No.

[F]

Maybe I'll get an interpretation too.

[B]

That something else was Perchlorethylene. Perchlore? Why, Inspector, such language.

[C]

The phone. I. Oh, not back yet.

[B]

Hello?

[E]

Mr. Wolfe?

[C]

Yes.

[E]

This is Brenda Barclay. Oh, Mr. Wolf.

[C]

What is it, Ms. Barkley?

[E]

You've got to come to Mr. Channing's office right away.

[C]

Mr. Wolfe, Mr. Goodman has been to your office. Everything I need to know here. You've got to come, Mr. Wolf. Nonsense. I don't go out. My digestion disapproves of it. I disapprove of it.

[E]

But Mr. Goodwin, he's in danger.

[D]

What's that?

[E]

Terrible danger. He needs you here at once.

[C]

Archie. In danger. Let me talk to him.

[B]

Please.

[E]

Come, hurry.

[C]

What's happened? Hello, Sparkly. Fritz, get out of the car. Bring me my wool muffler and worsted vest. See if you can find my galoshes. Confound it, I've got to go out.

[B]

Go on up.

[C]

Step to the rear of the car, please.

[E]

Mister, will you please step back?

[C]

I'm back as far as I can go.

[B]

You are?

[C]

Elevators. Contraptions for little men. Come, come, take me up, young man.

[B]

Hold it. Hold that car. I'm late for a date with a blonde. 16th floor, buddy.

[C]

Evening, Mr. Goodman.

[B]

Good evening.

[C]

I was told you were in danger.

[B]

Danger? I, Mr. Wolf. You what? What are you doing out down here?

[C]

Sparks?

[B]

His idea about me being in danger.

[C]

Obviously she was lying. I suspected at the time, but I fell in with her suggestion. I'm anxious to end the case. My presence here is needed.

[B]

Don't understand why she'd do such a thing. And why is your presence needed 16th floor?

[C]

It's a matter of.

[B]

Perspective. Brenda's got a very nice perspective. She'll be around here someplace. The agency's got this whole floor down this corridor next to Channing's. Oh, Kramer came through on those reports from the lab. That smudge on the carpet wasn't ink, it was a dye. Powdered aniline. Brenda. Oh.

[E]

Oh, Mr. Wolf. Hank. Heavens, you're here.

[B]

Hey, I'm here too.

[E]

The police, they questioned me again this afternoon. I'm sorry. Frightened. Mr. Wolf, you've got to find the murderer before they. Before they.

[B]

Baby, take it easy.

[E]

Oh, hello, Archie.

[B]

Hello. What's the idea of trying to pull a fast with a Mr. Wolf?

[E]

I just had to see him. Please understand.

[C]

Is this Channing's office?

[E]

Yes.

[B]

You told him I was in danger?

[C]

Ah, at last, a place to sit down.

[E]

I had to tell him something to get him down here.

[B]

He's not happy. You comfortable there, sir?

[C]

Ms. Barkley, come here.

[E]

Mr. Wolf, I can explain. I thought if you were here where it happened, I mean, if you could see for yourself, then you'd.

[C]

Young woman, there are many things I'd like to say to you.

[B]

Oh, now, wait a minute. She was scared, boss.

[C]

However, I am too short of breath to do them justice. Archie.

[B]

Yes?

[C]

Round up everyone concerned with this case right now, including Mrs. Channing. Get them in here.

[B]

Yes, sir.

[C]

You help him, Miss Barkley. And toes that window.

[E]

Yes, Mr. Wolf.

[C]

Fresh air. I've had enough today, thanks to you, to last me a lifetime. If after all that exposure, I live a lifetime.

[F]

What's going on here anyhow?

[B]

A tea party. Find yourself seats. Keep your knees steady. All right, Mr. Wolf, everybody's here.

[C]

Mr. Shoeshine, Kerry.

[D]

Here, sir. Here.

[C]

It was you who found the body?

[F]

Him and me. Mr. Wolf. I'm Abe Jackson, a night man.

[C]

You gentlemen can help us if you will.

[D]

Oh, to be sure, Mr. Wolfe.

[C]

I'd like to know the exact position of the body when you found it.

[F]

Well, he was setting up.

[D]

That's it, sir. Sitting up straight as you please.

[C]

You'll oblige me if you'll demonstrate. Sit in the chair, please.

[D]

His chair, sir, if you plead.

[B]

Abe, you.

[F]

Yeah. Oh, no, no, not me. Not on your life.

[D]

There's no easy thing you ask, Mr. Wolf.

[B]

I.

[D]

But I'll oblige you. So it was like. Like this, I'd say.

[C]

You agree, Mr. Jackson?

[F]

A little more right, maybe. Yeah, that's the way he was.

[C]

Ajey?

[B]

Yes, sir?

[C]

Help me with a brief recapitulation.

[B]

Well, so far as we know, Channing made no outcry.

[C]

Therefore he could not have been startled by the appearance of the killer.

[B]

There were powder burns on the body.

[C]

Therefore the gun was against Channing when it was fired. His own hand couldn't have held it closer.

[B]

Nobody heard the shot. Probably because this officer soundproofed. The gun that killed him was lying on the floor 10ft from the desk.

[C]

In the direction of flight. Through that door. Go on, Archie.

[B]

The killer was almost certainly well known to Channing, or Channing wouldn't have let him come that close without a struggle or an alarm. Also, the Killer had access to this office. Another proof that he's not a stranger.

[C]

One more point, if I may, Argie. The killer, he or she is present here. Now be quiet, everyone. We come now to the point I mentioned to you last night, Archie. The pint I call the sanctity of desk hood.

[E]

The sanctity of What?

[C]

Desk hood, Mrs. Jennings. Explain, Archie.

[B]

Still figure it's so important?

[C]

Absolutely essential.

[B]

I wrote it here somewhere. Oh, Desk hood refers to that area behind a desk where a man earns his livelihood, makes his career, builds his reputation.

[D]

You mean here where I'm sitting?

[B]

So long as a man sits at his desk, he enjoys a curious area of privacy. He is remarkably safe from intrusion. That's it, Mr. Wolf.

[C]

Sanctity of Des. Could think about it a moment. You see what I mean?

[E]

Nonsense. I've gone around that desk hundreds of times. I'm sure she has many more.

[C]

Hundreds.

[E]

If you mean what I think you mean. Mrs. Channing, you.

[C]

Please, ladies. Mrs. Channing, when you approached your husband at his desk, what did he do?

[E]

What did he. Why, he stood up and.

[C]

He stood up sparkly. You agree?

[E]

Yes. He'd have to stand up. At least he always did.

[C]

But for his murderer he did not. Archie, resume from your notes, please.

[B]

Well, whoever killed Walter Channing went around the desk without Channing rising, held a gun to his chest and pulled the trigger.

[C]

Excuse me. If you will go behind the desk and stand facing Mr. Karrihatchi here.

[B]

This the way you mean?

[C]

You know the angle of the body wound or the hole in the chair?

[B]

There wasn't any angle. One was in a straight line with the other.

[C]

From where you stand now in front of Mr. Kelly, if you wish to inflict an identical wound upon him, could you do it?

[B]

Not from where I stand. I'd have to kneel.

[C]

You'd have to kneel. Do so. No, please. The murder tableau. The question now, who could kneel before Channing if close enough to kill him from that position without alarming him in the least?

[E]

Kelly, the shoeshine man.

[A]

Hey, hey, wait a minute now.

[B]

Shut up, you, and sit there.

[C]

His motive is crystal clear.

[E]

The memorandum.

[C]

Memorandum? You have a copy, Ajay?

[B]

In my notebook.

[C]

Ah, yes. Ms. Barclay, read the part which could explain Mr. Kelly's actions.

[D]

No, no, not.

[C]

The memorial was all over the office. Kelly must have seen it.

[E]

Wait a minute.

[D]

Now.

[E]

Notice effective at once. Yes, here it is. In the interest of economy, daily shoe shines will be eliminated.

[F]

That'd cut off Kelly's bread and butter.

[D]

Kelly.

[C]

I can't believe it nor can I.

[E]

What?

[C]

It's obvious. Kelly murdered Walter Channing, Mr. Wolfe.

[D]

Now listen, I did nothing to the police.

[C]

The obvious can be too obvious.

[B]

Meaning what exactly?

[C]

Archie.

[B]

Yes, sir.

[C]

Brief these people on the ink stained trousers.

[B]

Channing spilled ink on his trouser cuff the night he was murdered. Somebody tried to clean the spot off.

[C]

What?

[B]

According to the police analysis, carbon tetrachloride and perchloroethylene showed up.

[C]

Both non inflammable ingredients used in many commercial cleaners.

[E]

Exactly what are you getting at, Mr. Wolfe?

[C]

One moment, Mrs. Channing. Mr. Goodwin also has an analysis of the spot on the carpet behind the desk. Archie.

[B]

A powder form of dye.

[C]

Aniline dye used in what perhaps?

[B]

Well, the lab suggested a shoe dressing.

[D]

I got no powder dye. I swear I ain't, Mr. Woolf.

[C]

I'm sure you haven't, Mr. Kelly. You'll find this particular type of dressing is used on women's shoes. Suede shoes usually.

[E]

I don't understand.

[B]

Wait a minute, wait a minute.

[C]

Yes, Archie?

[B]

If a woman. Now suppose a woman knelt in front of Chanie to clean that ink spot off his trouser cuff. That smudge could have rubbed off the tip of her shoe onto the carpet.

[C]

Exactly. I believe you'll find a typewriter cleaner contains tetrachloride and perchlor.

[D]

Ethylene.

[B]

Something else just occurred to me. That memo was sent around the morning after Channing was killed.

[F]

I never thought of that.

[C]

True, Archie, and for only one purpose, to point suspicion at Kitty.

[B]

But when the police didn't take the hint.

[C]

Go on, Archie, what then?

[B]

Somebody else was brought down here who would. Comes round to three questions, doesn't it? Who knew about the memo. Who had access to Channing's file, where he kept his gun and who made sure Nero Wolf would see the evidence against Kelly?

[C]

Three questions, Archie, with one answer. That spells the name of the murderess. Our own client. Brenda Bakke. Steak, Archie, marinated. You like it?

[B]

I'm not hungry.

[C]

Indeed. I suggest a tonic.

[B]

That reminds me, I had a call you had. Doris Channing. She had some idea about my explaining things to her.

[C]

She found my explanation insufficient?

[B]

No, but she felt it lacked the personal touch.

[C]

Phooey. Hand me a can of beer. However, you do have the evening off.

[B]

Yes, sir.

[C]

Keep out of trouble. Doris Channing is a blonde. Let us try to keep out of.

[B]

Trouble in the company of a blonde who wants to. Good night, sir.

[C]

Good night, aji. Good night.

[G]

You have been listening to the new Adventures of Nero Wolf starring Sydney Green Street. Tonight's transcribed story by William Kendall Clark was based on the characters created by Rex Stout. This is an Edmund Fadiman program produced and directed by J. Donald Wilson. In the cast were Larry Dobkin as Archie Goodman and Donald Morrison, Betty Lou Gerson, Bill Johnstone, Howard McNear, Mary Lansing, and Barney Phillips. Next week at this same time, Nero Wolf and Archie will bring you the case of the girl who Cried Wolf. John Storm speaking. Near a wolf. Archie and all of our cast hope that our listeners have taken time out from this busy Christmas season to help brighten some youngsters Christmas Day. Be sure to send a thing, your choice, of anything you think a child would like for Christmas to the groups in your own town who are distributing these toy gifts to less fortunate children. Three chimes mean good times on NBC.