Twilight Zone ep007 - Mr. Dingle, the Strong

Summary

Podcast Title: Harold's Old Time Radio
Episode: Twilight Zone ep007 - Mr. Dingle, the Strong
Release Date: June 9, 2025
Host/Author: Harold's Old Time Radio

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Summary

Mr. Dingle, the Strong is a captivating episode from the celebrated series "Harold's Old Time Radio," which masterfully reimagines classic narratives from the Golden Age of Radio. This episode delves into the life of Luther Dingle, a seemingly ordinary vacuum cleaner salesman who transforms into an extraordinary figure through unforeseen extraterrestrial intervention. Blending humor, drama, and the quintessential Twilight Zone twist, the episode offers listeners a rich tapestry of character development, societal commentary, and imaginative storytelling.

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Introduction to Luther Dingle

The story introduces Luther Dingle as a down-on-his-luck vacuum cleaner salesman struggling to make ends meet. His lack of success in sales and his perceived physical weakness make him a target of ridicule in his local neighborhood bar, setting the stage for his transformation.

Notable Quote:

"He is a consummate failure at almost everything. But soon two visitors from outer space will arrive on the scene and alter the destiny of Luther Dingle by leaving him a legacy."
— Narrator (03:50)

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Life at Yancey Street and the Local Bar

Luther's interactions at Yancey Street, especially with the neighborhood bar patrons Anthony O'Toole and Joseph Callahan, highlight his meek personality and the community's dismissive attitude towards him. His attempts to sell his vacuum cleaner are met with scorn and hostility, underscoring his social struggles.

Notable Quotes:

"Oh, this? This is The Hercules mark 4. The finest device ever made for hearth and home."
— Luther Dingle (01:31)

"You're a salesman. You better stay away from my place. My dad hates salesmen."
— Teen Advocate (01:56)

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Extraterrestrial Intervention

Two extraterrestrial beings, a Madam and Joseph Callahan, arrive with the mission of enhancing Luther's physical strength and later his intelligence. Their observations and actions set the trajectory for Luther's transformation, aiming to turn him into the world's strongest man and a mental giant.

Notable Quotes:

"We have not found anyone weaker, have we? Negative. This one will make an exceptional subject."
— Madam (12:35)

"He will have the strength of 300 men and the intelligence of 500."
— Joseph Callahan (36:58)

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Transformation and Demonstration of Strength

Post-enhancement, Luther exhibits superhuman strength, astonishing the local bar patrons and the wider community. His newfound abilities lead to public attention, media coverage, and opportunistic offers from entertainment industries, contrasting sharply with his previously subdued life.

Notable Quotes:

"I'm the world's strongest man!"
— Luther Dingle (31:44)

"Mr. Dingle has just punched a hole through a solid wall with his bare fist."
— Ryan Seacrest (32:11)

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Media Frenzy and Public Perception

Luther's feats draw media attention, particularly from Jason Abernathy, a reporter eager to capitalize on Luther's abilities. The narrative explores themes of fame, exploitation, and the ethical implications of extraordinary powers bestowed upon an ordinary individual.

Notable Quotes:

"Mr. Dingle, Luther is my number one customer. Never goes to any other establishment."
— Anthony O'Toole (30:07)

"If what I hear is true, do you realize how much money you could make on a tour with my international circus?"
— Anthony O'Toole (30:15)

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Devolution of Strength and Introduction of Intelligence

As Luther's strength begins to wane, the extraterrestrial beings decide to grant him enhanced intelligence instead. This shift transforms Luther from a physically powerful individual into a mental powerhouse, presenting new challenges and dynamics in his interactions with others.

Notable Quotes:

"It is apparently on an advanced mathematical plan that the entire quantum theory of space and time relativity must of necessity."
— Luther Dingle (37:54)

"These latter powers will very likely be eliminated before too long, but Mr. Dingle has an appeal to extraterrestrial note takers as well as to frustrated and insolvent pet loosers."
— Narrator (38:09)

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Climactic Resolution in the Twilight Zone

The episode culminates with Luther embracing his dual enhancements, navigating his new reality while maintaining his humble nature. The Twilight Zone narrative framework underscores the surreal transformation and its impact on Luther's identity and place in society.

Notable Quotes:

"Exit. Mr. Luther Dingle, former vacuum cleaner salesman, strongest man on earth, and now mental giant."
— Narrator (38:09)

"He lives his life with one foot planted firmly in the Twilight Zone."
— Narrator (38:09)

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Conclusion and Reflections

Mr. Dingle, the Strong serves as a poignant exploration of human potential, the quest for recognition, and the complexities that accompany extraordinary abilities. Through Luther Dingle's journey, the episode invites listeners to ponder the true essence of strength—be it physical, mental, or emotional—and the societal structures that define and often limit individual worth.

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Additional Insights

• Character Development: The transformation of Luther from a timid salesman to a powerful figure highlights the versatility of character arcs within radio dramas.

• Societal Commentary: The episode subtly critiques societal perceptions of masculinity, success, and the exploitation inherent in fame and media.

• Technological Parallels: The portrayal of vacuum cleaners and their symbolic representation reflect the era's technological advancements and consumer culture.

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Final Thoughts

Mr. Dingle, the Strong epitomizes the enchanting allure of old-time radio storytelling, blending suspense, humor, and moral dilemmas within a fantastical framework. Harold's adept adaptation ensures that both nostalgic listeners and new audiences are enthralled by this timeless tale from the Twilight Zone.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• "I don't suppose that is you. You wouldn't care to purchase one of my vacuum cleaners by any chance?"
  — Luther Dingle (04:17)

• "If you don't happen to like the food."
  — Anthony O'Toole (15:05)

• "It is absurdly phone to believe that with my abilities, I could contribute more positively to the community."
  — Luther Dingle (15:56)

• "He's a hero."
  — Joseph Callahan (22:33)

• "These latter powers will very likely be eliminated before too long."
  — Narrator (38:09)

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This comprehensive summary captures the essence of Mr. Dingle, the Strong, offering a detailed overview while highlighting pivotal moments and dialogues that drive the narrative forward.

Transcript

[Teen Advocate]

Use of flavored tobacco by teens is a crisis. Tobacco companies use flavors like cotton candy, watermelon ice and cool mint to hook kids like me. They seem harmless, but they are. Addiction to nicotine sets us up for a lifetime of health problems. Organ legislators can do something about it. Passing Senate Bill 702A will keep flavored tobacco away from kids. But there are just a few short weeks left for lawmakers to act. Take action to protect kids like me. @ flavorshookoregonkids.org paid for by the campaign for tobacco free kids action fund.

[Narrator]

You're traveling through another dimension. A dimension not only of sight and sound, but of mind. A journey into a wondrous land whose boundaries are that of imagination. Your next stop, the twilight zone.

[Teen Advocate]

Go for a pass. Okay.

[Luther Dingle]

Fumble. Let's see now. Fairfield. Excuse me, boys.

[Teen Advocate]

Hey, mister, get out of the way. Yeah, we're playing football.

[Luther Dingle]

Surely, but first. That is, if you don't mind. Huh? Could you. Could you direct me to yancey street?

[Teen Advocate]

What do you want to know for?

[Luther Dingle]

Well, I've never been to that particular neighborhood.

[Teen Advocate]

And how come you're carrying that thing?

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, this? This is The Hercules mark 4. The finest device ever made for hearth and home.

[Teen Advocate]

What is it, some kind of an invention?

[Luther Dingle]

Why, yes, as a matter of fact. A new breakthrough in home hygiene. It removes dust and dirt that you can't see with the naked eye. It comes complete with a laboratory grade filter and an extension hose.

[Teen Advocate]

You mean a vacuum cleaner?

[Luther Dingle]

No, no, no, no, no. Nothing so prosaic. Yeah, it is.

[Teen Advocate]

And you're a salesman. You better stay away from my place. My dad hates salesmen. Mine too. He'll suck you in the jaw, the last guy that came around.

[Luther Dingle]

If you could just point the way to yancy street over there by the park.

[Teen Advocate]

But don't stop at my house neither. My mom will kick your butt.

[Luther Dingle]

Yeah, yeah, of course. Oh, that guy was weird.

[Teen Advocate]

Yeah, with his little hat. What a loser.

[Luther Dingle]

Here we are at Yancy street. Might as well try the first apartment.

[Teen Advocate]

Yeah.

[Luther Dingle]

Madam, may I have a word? Who are you? My name's dingle. I have something for you.

[Madam]

You a process server?

[Luther Dingle]

No, ma' am. I'm here to social worker. No, no, not at all. I merely a cop. No, no.

[Madam]

You said you wanted to give me something.

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, yes, indeed.

[Madam]

Well, you can come in, I guess, for a minute.

[Luther Dingle]

Lovely place you have here.

[Teen Advocate]

Yeah, sure it is.

[Luther Dingle]

Now then, I have the most amazing thing to show you. That it. Yes, Looks kind of like a big.

[Madam]

Tin can with knobs and wires.

[Luther Dingle]

I'LL just plug it in. Now pretend if you will, that this rug here is your brain. And this dirt. What are you doing? This dirt is all the messy thoughts in your head. He threw dirt on my floor. No. Watch what happens when I turn on the Hercules. Mark 4. All that filth goes away in a flash.

[Madam]

It better.

[Luther Dingle]

See? Suck, suck, suck. Gone, gone, gone.

[Madam]

Get that thing out of my house.

[Luther Dingle]

If you wish. But first I'd like to tell you.

[Joseph Callahan]

About what's going on in there.

[Madam]

It's a crazy man. He spilled dirt all over.

[Joseph Callahan]

And then he say, pal, what are you trying to pull?

[Luther Dingle]

I was just demonstrating.

[Joseph Callahan]

You a salesman?

[Luther Dingle]

Well, you might say it.

[Joseph Callahan]

Take your crap and get moving.

[Luther Dingle]

Just one question before I go.

[Joseph Callahan]

What's that?

[Luther Dingle]

I don't suppose that is you. You wouldn't care to purchase one of my vacuum cleaners by any chance?

[Joseph Callahan]

Get out.

[Luther Dingle]

Now we have easy time. Pam.

[Teen Advocate]

Look at him. I told you, mister. My old man don't like salesmen.

[Luther Dingle]

Thank you. Thank you both very much. No, I think. I think I'll just try the next block over.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Well, Callahan, you heard the man. He says he's not gonna pay, so that's that.

[Joseph Callahan]

Yeah, you want me to pay on a bum call? Where I come from, a bet's a bet. You saw the play. The umpire's blind. Look, you shouldn't have took the bet. I set the odds and you took em. All I want is what's coming to me.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Ah, hello, Mr. Dingle. The usual?

[Luther Dingle]

Not quite yet, Mr. O' Toole. Just allow me to sit here and collect my thoughts.

[Narrator]

Uniquely American institution known as the neighborhood bar. First up is Mr. Anthony O' Toole, proprietor who waters his drinks like geraniums but who stands four square for peace and quiet and booths for ladies. Then Mr. Joseph Callahan, an unregistered bookie whose entire life is any sporting event with two sides and a set of odds. His idea of a summit meeting is any dialogue between a catcher and a pitcher with more than one man on base and the citizen who wants his payoff is every anonymous better. Whoever dropped rent money on a horse race, a prize fight or a floating crap game and who took out his frustrations and his insolvency on any vulnerable fellow. Barstool companion within arms and fists reach. And Mr. Luther Dingle, a vacuum cleaner salesman whose volume of business is roughly that of a valet at a hobo convention. He is a consummate failure at almost everything. But soon two visitors from outer space will arrive on the scene and alter the destiny of Luther Dingell by leaving him a legacy. In just a moment, a sad faced punching bag who missed even the caboose of life's gravy train will take a short constitutional into that most unpredictable region, the one we refer to as the twilight zone.

[Anthony O'Toole]

And now, the Twilight zone and our story, Mr. Dingle the Strong. Starring Tim Kazarinski. With Stacy Keach as your narrator.

[Joseph Callahan]

Don't give me that, Callahan. I've told you before, I don't pay off on a bum call. Three umpires called him out. I called him out. 11,000 fans called him out. Final score, Pittsburgh 3, Dodgers nothing. You and me got an even bet. I got the Pirates. Hence you owe me five bucks. I know a bum call when I see one. That ball was foul when it hit it. It don't matter what you think you saw. So instead of an out, it was a foul ball. Who's to say he wouldn't have got on base so that after the single he would have scored a run? And like that. You're dreaming. And furthermore, Callahan, you. You're a low down cheatin insult to American bookiedom. I'm gonna give you five seconds to take back that innuendo.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Callahan. I told you once before. Already.

[Joseph Callahan]

Told me what?

[Anthony O'Toole]

You started brawling here again and I'll fix that mouth of yours so from now on you'll be doing all your drinking through a tube stuck in a vein.

[Joseph Callahan]

Me? I give you trouble?

[Anthony O'Toole]

You heard me.

[Joseph Callahan]

Tell it to the number one welcher of all the western states over here. This guy still owes me money for the fight.

[Luther Dingle]

You?

[Joseph Callahan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe on account of that was a bum call too. And I don't pay off on bum calls. Hey, Dingle.

[Luther Dingle]

Yes?

[Joseph Callahan]

You remember that fight? The champ's out of the ring and the ref gives him a long count like everybody in the room. Could have gone out for a beer, engaged in some small talk and then come back and still sat down before the ref has finished counting. Now, how about that? I'm asking you.

[Luther Dingle]

Me?

[Joseph Callahan]

Yeah, you. How about that? You're asking Dingle? I sure am. I'm asking him.

[Luther Dingle]

Well, I. I don't know.

[Joseph Callahan]

You see the game on television last night?

[Luther Dingle]

Well, as a matter of fact. As a matter of fact, I did watch it. Yes, there you go.

[Joseph Callahan]

Now we'll settle this. You talk about bum calls. Ninth inning. Batters up with two down and we got a man on first and a man on second. And this umpire with no pupils in his eyes calls a foul ball and out. You see that?

[Luther Dingle]

I believe I did see that particular play.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Then you tell him. You just tell him what you saw. Go on.

[Luther Dingle]

Exceptional defensive play. Abner Doubleday would have been proud.

[Joseph Callahan]

Never mind Abner Doubleday. I leave it up to you. Was that a foul ball or was it an out?

[Luther Dingle]

Well, I.

[Joseph Callahan]

Come on over to the bar, Dingle, and I'll buy you a drink, Refresh your memory. I'll pay for it.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Put your money away, both of yous. This one's on the house.

[Joseph Callahan]

Okay. Take your time. Say it. Say what you saw.

[Luther Dingle]

Well, it did appear to me. Yeah, it appeared to me that the ball was in safe territory.

[Joseph Callahan]

Appeared?

[Luther Dingle]

Consequently, upon striking the ground and then hitting the batter, the rules would very clearly indicate that the batter was out.

[Joseph Callahan]

You heard it. You realize, of course, pal, that you're calling me a liar. Now, I ain't an unreasonable man, man. So I'll give you one more chance, all right? Was that a foul or was it an out?

[Luther Dingle]

Well, as I say, it's my considered opinion.

[Joseph Callahan]

Here's what I think of your opinion.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Hey, that's enough. Back off. What happened here, Mr. Dingle, let me help you.

[Luther Dingle]

Oh. Oh, yes. Thank. Thank you very kindly, Mr. O' Toole.

[Anthony O'Toole]

How come you always got a hit, Dingle? You hit him last week. You hit him the week before.

[Joseph Callahan]

A man can only stand so much. I'm tired of this guy contradicting me. And when somebody calls me a liar, there's my honor to consider. Your honor? You've got nothing but larceny in you all the way from your arches to where you part your hair. And when you die, they're gonna have to screw you into the ground. How about that, Dingle? Is that true? I'm crooked? I leave it to you, buddy. Am I crooked?

[Anthony O'Toole]

Well, Dingle, Dingle, just once, why can't you just be neutral?

[Luther Dingle]

That's an interesting question.

[Joseph Callahan]

Watch what you say, Dingle. I got money riding on this.

[Madam]

You are sure? We are invisible? Beyond any doubt. This represents a typical gathering place for Earth men. From the coordinates, yes. Did you ever see such primitive looking creatures? Typical earthmen.

[Joseph Callahan]

And I say that anybody tells me Philadelphia had any right to win the pennant that year as out of their green grass minds, you're blind as a bat. And you're stupid, too. Furthermore, if you're gonna sit there and tell me. Look at the record books. What? I rest my case.

[Madam]

Not entirely typical. The one in the middle with the hat and peculiar neck adornment. In Earth terminology, I believe it is called a bowtie. He appears to have suffered physical damage at the Hands of his fellow humans. Appalling. This might be the perfect specimen. Does that compute? The very one we're looking for. Silence. I'm receiving his brain waves now. Awaiting confirmation. His name is Dingle. He's an abject coward. He doesn't even possess the minimum musculature for survival on this planet. Decidedly a sub physical type. A genetic throwback. I believe we have found our subject. You intend to give him the additional strength? We have not found anyone weaker, have we? Negative. This one will make an exceptional subject. I estimate 11 additional psychograms atomic weight. That should make him approximately 300 times as strong as the average human. Yes, that will suffice. Contact the mother ship. Tell them we have picked a subject. They may begin observing him in 60 Earth seconds.

[Joseph Callahan]

Confirmed.

[Madam]

Adjust settings.

[Joseph Callahan]

Check.

[Madam]

And prepare to let him have it.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Look, Dingle, you don't gotta answer this guy at all.

[Joseph Callahan]

What do you mean?

[Anthony O'Toole]

Just cuz he don't happen to like the food.

[Joseph Callahan]

Let him tell me. He's got a brain, don't he? Of course he does. You got a point of view, don't you, Dingle? All right, let's get historical. You follow the game, you know the stats. What did you think of the Phillies back in say, 53? That was a big year.

[Luther Dingle]

The Phillies in 1953.

[Joseph Callahan]

That's right. You tell me, for example, if you think Robin Roberts was one half the picture that Lebein was that year.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Here we go again.

[Luther Dingle]

Well, of the two, I'd be inclined to take Roberts.

[Joseph Callahan]

You heard the man, buddy. Why all the time you gotta fight me? Now let's run through this one more time. You say that Robin Roberts had more stuff than Clem Lebein.

[Luther Dingle]

To be perfectly honest and candid as to the two men, as good as they both were, all things being equal.

[Joseph Callahan]

So come on already. Hey, little man. Tom, who do you pick?

[Luther Dingle]

Roberts.

[Anthony O'Toole]

I'm telling you guys for the last time. You pull any more rough stuff around here and I ain't gonna let you in that front door. Now look what you've done to this poor little fella.

[Joseph Callahan]

Ah, he's coming around.

[Anthony O'Toole]

How do you feel, Dingle?

[Luther Dingle]

Clem Lebine was definitely superior.

[Joseph Callahan]

You see, all I'm doing is helping him see things clear.

[Luther Dingle]

What was that?

[Anthony O'Toole]

What was what?

[Luther Dingle]

I don't know, but I definitely felt something for a second just then.

[Anthony O'Toole]

How you doing?

[Luther Dingle]

You all right? Definitely. Clem Lebein.

[Anthony O'Toole]

All the same, I think you better go on home.

[Luther Dingle]

If you insist, but I feel quite well. Quite remarkably well, in point of fact.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Here's your vacuum?

[Luther Dingle]

Very kind of you, but I can carry it.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Tingle. Do you mind? You know, a word of advice?

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, no, not at all.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Look, there's some guys in this world that are, you know, they're gonna get punched in the nose no matter who they pick in a ball game or who they vote for or the color of the tie they put on in the morning.

[Luther Dingle]

I quite agree, o' Tool. Though I've always thought polka dots were quite stylish, personally.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Yeah, well, look, you're one of those guys, Dingle. So you know what I think you ought to do? From now on, don't talk, just nod. If a guy asks you who you like in the third race, you just.

[Luther Dingle]

Smile at him, okay?

[Anthony O'Toole]

If somebody asks you who you're voting for, you just nod.

[Luther Dingle]

Okay?

[Anthony O'Toole]

And if you're sitting in the bleachers for a doubleheader and you hear some guy yelling for the Dodgers, you don't go yelling for the Pirates.

[Luther Dingle]

You just leave your seat and you.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Go get a hot dog. You understand, Dingle?

[Luther Dingle]

I believe so. A word to the wise and so forth. Very considerate of you, Mr. O' Toole. I'll definitely give the concept further thought. Yeah.

[Joseph Callahan]

What's the matter?

[Luther Dingle]

Well, that. That's odd.

[Joseph Callahan]

What is?

[Luther Dingle]

I feel. I feel so funny.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Funny how?

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, nothing. I'm. I'm sure I'm fine now. But for a moment there, it was as if something passed over me or through me and I. I heard a high pitched sound. Very odd. Did anyone else hear it?

[Anthony O'Toole]

I can't say as I did.

[Joseph Callahan]

What's he talking about now?

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, well, no. What do you suppose caused that?

[Anthony O'Toole]

Caused what?

[Luther Dingle]

With this vacuum cleaner. Feels light as a feather. Not that the machine isn't light. It happens to be one of the lightest on the market.

[Joseph Callahan]

Aw, give me a break.

[Luther Dingle]

No, it's a handy dandy Jim cracker. A one piece of merchandise. A guarantee to lighten the labor and lengthen the life of that wonderful partner in the American home, the housewife. But. But I've never noticed it was this light.

[Anthony O'Toole]

See you, Dingle.

[Joseph Callahan]

What the. Did you see that? The door fell off.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Hey, look, Dingle, I mean, with all your faults, despite the fact that you cost me in band aids, what I normally would have to put out for the water bill. You've always been a nice type fella who never gave me no trouble. But why all of a sudden do you have to go wrecking my front door?

[Luther Dingle]

Door? Oh, believe me, Mr. O' Toole, I am mystified. I am Absolutely mystified. The door just seemed to. Just seem to come off its hinges when I grasped the knob very lightly in my hand, my right hand. I'll just set it here against the wall, and you can do whatever you need to make it better again. I bid you good day, gentlemen.

[Joseph Callahan]

Cheese o' Toole. What kind of drink did you pour him anyway?

[Teen Advocate]

Nearly 90% of kids who vape say flavors are why they do it. A lot of the flavors that I've heard are like peach, mango, watermelon. It makes it seem like more childlike and innocent. Oh, I tried this once. It won't be that much of a problem. But then eventually, it becomes a problem. It's time to restrict the sale of flavored tobacco products in Oregon and protect our kids from nicotine addiction. Urge lawmakers to Pass Senate Bill 702A. Take action at flavorshookoregonkids.org paid for by the Campaign for Tobacco Free Kids Action Fund. This summer, Instacart is bringing back your favorites from 1999 with prices from 1999. That means 90s prices on juice pouches that ought to be respected, 90s prices on box Mac and cheese, and 90s prices on ham, cheese and cracker lunches. Enjoy all those throwbacks and more at throwback prices only through Instacart. $4.72. Maximum discount per $10 of eligible items. Limit three offers per order. Expires September 5th, while supplies last. Discount based on CPI comparison. Look it. There's that dweeb again.

[Luther Dingle]

Boys. Hey, mister.

[Teen Advocate]

Why'd you come back, huh? I told you my dad had sack you in the jaw, and he did. Yeah, you're really asking for it.

[Luther Dingle]

Quite right. Only this time I'm not going to Yancey street, merely to that park bench to sit in the sun and collect my thoughts.

[Teen Advocate]

He talks funny. I got an idea. Give me the ball.

[Luther Dingle]

You gonna throw it at him?

[Teen Advocate]

Yeah, knock his dumb head off. Bet you can't do it. Watch this.

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, jeez. No, no, boys. That's not the best of all possible manners, is it?

[Teen Advocate]

Pretty funny. Go pedal your vacuum cleaners, you creep, and throw the ball back.

[Luther Dingle]

Think you can catch it?

[Teen Advocate]

He can't even throw it.

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, is that so? All right, Go back for a pass.

[Joseph Callahan]

Sure.

[Luther Dingle]

Let me see now. How does one grip a football? Ah, yes. I think I've got it. Ready? Here goes.

[Teen Advocate]

Whoa. Look at it go. Right at that building. It's gonna hit the window.

[Madam]

Here's your lunch, Arthur.

[Luther Dingle]

You want some soup with that?

[Joseph Callahan]

Just let me read my paper.

[Luther Dingle]

Here.

[Joseph Callahan]

Okay, Lydia, I gotta go back to work.

[Luther Dingle]

Your rule was at work. Work. Don't you like being home no more?

[Joseph Callahan]

Too hot. The air conditioner don't work if you.

[Luther Dingle]

Tell the super to fix it.

[Joseph Callahan]

What the heck was that?

[Madam]

I don't know, Arthur. But you don't have to tell the super nothing.

[Luther Dingle]

Cause now we got a nice cross ventilation all the way to the next apartment.

[Teen Advocate]

Hey, mister, where'd you learn to throw a ball like that?

[Luther Dingle]

I really don't know. I don't know what's happening to me. What in the world is happening to me?

[Joseph Callahan]

Get those kids down there. They broke my window.

[Teen Advocate]

We better get out of here.

[Luther Dingle]

Yes.

[Joseph Callahan]

Out of the street.

[Luther Dingle]

A taxi over here.

[Joseph Callahan]

Where to?

[Luther Dingle]

I don't care. Anywhere. I'm in a hurry.

[Joseph Callahan]

Get in, pal.

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, yes, of course.

[Joseph Callahan]

Hey, you two of my back door off. What you do that for?

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, believe me, this is as much a mystery to me as it is to you. I'll leave it right here so you can fix it.

[Joseph Callahan]

Now how am I going to do that?

[Luther Dingle]

Just. Just let me catch my breath.

[Joseph Callahan]

Hey, quit leaning on my car. You're tipping it over. Help. Somebody get me out of here.

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, dear me. You're pinned under the steering wheel, aren't you? Give me a second there. You can get out now.

[Teen Advocate]

Did you see that? He lifted the car and turned it.

[Joseph Callahan]

Over with one hand.

[Luther Dingle]

I can't believe my eyes. Most amazing thing I ever saw.

[Teen Advocate]

Who is he?

[Joseph Callahan]

He's a hero.

[Luther Dingle]

What's your name? No name. I mean, I'm nobody. Nobody at all. Excuse me, miss. Yes? May I share your park bench? Yes, of course.

[Madam]

It's not mine. I only come here in the afternoon.

[Luther Dingle]

With your charming baby. I see. Oh, he's not mine either. I'm just the nanny.

[Madam]

They want him to have his time in the park.

[Luther Dingle]

No. How perfectly lovely. I don't actually. I know that is.

[Madam]

You're not married?

[Luther Dingle]

Never. Really?

[Madam]

That's hard to believe. A nice, normal man like you.

[Luther Dingle]

I thank you. For what? Well, no. No woman's ever said that to me before. That, you know, I'm. I'm normal.

[Madam]

You're joking.

[Luther Dingle]

I wish I were. I'm not acquainted with many women. Hardly any, in fact. On the personal level. Gosh, I hope you don't mind chatting like this. Not at all.

[Madam]

I spend a lot of time here taking care of the baby.

[Luther Dingle]

Cute little fella. I know what he wants.

[Teen Advocate]

You do?

[Luther Dingle]

Well, look up. Where? That tree branch above your head. There's an apple on it. And the baby sees that really? Oh, I'm sure of it. Coochie, coochie coo. Aren't you the cutest little fella? Look, I don't want you to think I'm a masher or anything. I'm certainly not a masher. But I wonder if you'd mind answering a question. That depends. Well, what I mean is. I mean, looking at me, would you say, at least upon a perfunctory cursory very first surveil, would I appear to be abnormal in any way?

[Anthony O'Toole]

Not at all.

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, thank you.

[Madam]

Unless you plan to use that in the park.

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, that. You know, up to a few hours ago, I sold those things. Newfangled vacuum cleaners. Or at least I went through the motions. I was miserably bad as a salesman. Just miserable. Would you believe it? Last week I made exactly $0.89 in commission. And that was for an attachment. An upholstery nozzle. And I sold it to a drunk who kept insisting it was a divining rod for alcohol. Is that why you stopped? Well, there were other factors. I expected to be fired today anyway. But that's the least of my worries. Now. A few minutes ago, people were chasing me.

[Joseph Callahan]

Why?

[Luther Dingle]

Well, that's just it. Because they thought I was abnormal. Now I ask you, would you be interested in hearing the source of my worries?

[Madam]

Go ahead. That apple, for instance.

[Luther Dingle]

The baby wants it, but you can't reach it, can you?

[Madam]

No.

[Luther Dingle]

Not even if you put the baby down and stood up on the bench. I couldn't put the baby down. Precisely. But what if I were to give you a hand? I'm not sure I. Mossy, this bench weighs, oh, I'd say 100, 150 pounds. And you're no more than 110 to 115.

[Madam]

Well, 125.

[Luther Dingle]

Well, what if I were to stand, reach down, pick up the bench by one of its legs and lift it straight up into the air like this? Please put us down so that you could reach the apple and you wouldn't even have to disturb the baby. Go on, reach over and take it. And then I put the bench down with you and the baby on it, Right back down on the ground, as gentle as there. Would you say that's abnormal? How.

[Teen Advocate]

How did you.

[Joseph Callahan]

Hey, man, could you do that again?

[Luther Dingle]

Whoa.

[Joseph Callahan]

I'm not sure I got my camera with me. I sure would like to get a shot of that.

[Luther Dingle]

Is.

[Joseph Callahan]

Is it a magic trick like in Las Vegas? Are you a magician or what?

[Luther Dingle]

No, it's just something that I've discovered I can do. Very recently, as a matter of fact. You see, I better get the baby home now.

[Joseph Callahan]

Let me just get the camera set up.

[Luther Dingle]

But the young lady's gone now. There's no point in lifting the bench with no one on it, is there?

[Joseph Callahan]

Do something else or.

[Luther Dingle]

Like what?

[Joseph Callahan]

Anything.

[Luther Dingle]

I don't know.

[Joseph Callahan]

At least let me take your picture. Stand right there by that big rock.

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, here. Well, I suppose one picture wouldn't do any harm. Shall I take my hat off? Of course. Then the sun would be in my eyes when I have to squint.

[Joseph Callahan]

Well, can you show me your muscles or something?

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, I'm sorry. I don't believe I have any muscles to speak of.

[Joseph Callahan]

Yeah, right. Say cheese.

[Luther Dingle]

Wait. Now the rock is in the way. Perhaps if you stand a few feet.

[Joseph Callahan]

To your left, and then the sun will be right in the lens.

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, in that case, I better move the rock. May I? Hold on one second.

[Joseph Callahan]

Whoa. You lifted it just like that. It must weigh a ton.

[Luther Dingle]

There, young man. Is that better? I suppose you can snap my picture now. If you insist.

[Joseph Callahan]

Yeah, that's great.

[Luther Dingle]

Are you sure this is my good side?

[Joseph Callahan]

Couple more. All right. Wait till my editor sees this.

[Teen Advocate]

Nearly 90% of kids who vape say flavors are why they do it. A lot of the flavors that I've heard are like peach, mango, watermelon. It makes it seem like more childlike and innocent. Oh, I tried this once. It won't be that much of a problem. But then eventually it becomes a problem. It's time to restrict the sale of flavored tobacco products in Oregon and protect our kids from nicotine addiction. Urge lawmakers to Pass Senate Bill Citizens 702A. Take action at flavorshookoregonkids.org Paid for by the Campaign for Tobacco Free Kids Action Fund.

[Ryan Seacrest]

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[Anthony O'Toole]

No purchase necessary.

[Joseph Callahan]

VGW Group.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Void where prohibited by law, 21/ Terms and Conditions apply.

[Joseph Callahan]

For the love of Mike, did you see this?

[Anthony O'Toole]

What do you got there, Callahan?

[Joseph Callahan]

It's Dingle on the front page of the Daily Bulletin.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Let me see that. Hercules. No, It's Luther Dingle. 20th century Samson.

[Joseph Callahan]

Good gravy. There's his picture. Picking up a giant rock. You mean this is our Dingle?

[Anthony O'Toole]

None other, by the looks of it.

[Luther Dingle]

And this is where I spend my afternoons when I'm not working, of course.

[Joseph Callahan]

Dingle, my old pal. Hey, have a seat, buddy boy.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Mr. Luther Dingle. His favorite neighborhood pub. A regular guy who lives leads a regular life when he's not busy performing miracles. This is Jason Abernathy, and I'm here to bring you the full story on my eyeball news report.

[Anthony O'Toole]

So who wants a drink? Step right up.

[Luther Dingle]

Are you his friend? What's he really like? What was his first feat of strength? Did you always know he was special?

[Joseph Callahan]

What's his secret?

[Anthony O'Toole]

Well, now, Mr. Dingle, Luther is my number one customer. Never goes to any other establishment. Ain't that right, boys?

[Joseph Callahan]

That's the truth. I knew he had it in him. We was pals all the way back to grade school.

[Anthony O'Toole]

All right, who's Next? Line up.

[Luther Dingle]

Mr. Dingle, if what I hear is true, do you realize how much money you could make on a tour with my international circus? A circus, eh? I don't know. Vegas, Atlantic City, Branson, Missouri.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Hey, don't listen to her.

[Luther Dingle]

Hey, Dingle, your future's in television. You're the walking, talking embodiment of every American male's wish fulfillment. You're John Q.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Citizen, your fabric, your Tom Dickens.

[Luther Dingle]

Harry will develop a sitcom around those values. A spin off after several guest spots, of course. I'm just not sure. All right, well, how about an infomercial? A simple across the board address by you with examples of your physical prowess, followed by product endorsements. It's a natural for breakfast cereals, vitamin pills, anything at all. You mean like Jack lalanne, the juice man? That sort of thing?

[Joseph Callahan]

Forget it, Dingle. I keep telling you, boxing is a piece of cake. You line up with me, I'll get you a couple of real easy setups, and inside of eight months, I'll have you fighting for the world championship. Or if you want to go with the WWF instead.

[Ryan Seacrest]

All right. All right, everybody. We're going on the air live in just a few seconds with the people around. Mr. Dingle, get out of the way, please.

[Joseph Callahan]

I don't want to.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Okay, on the air in 4, 3, 2, 1.

[Luther Dingle]

And.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hello, friends. Jason Abernathy here. Our unusual subject today is Mr. Luther Dingle, who, if what actual onlookers say is true, and is the world's strongest man.

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, Well, I know Mr. Dingle.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Mr. Dingle, would you Give us an example of this fantastic, allegedly fantastic strength of yours.

[Luther Dingle]

Well, I'd be happy to, Mr. O' Toole. Is it all right? You know the thing we discussed.

[Anthony O'Toole]

What, are you kidding? I ain't done this much business since, well, I don't know when. Be my guest, Dingle.

[Luther Dingle]

Well, yes. I'll start off with something simple. See this wall? Solid plaster. Supported, I believe, by wooden studs. I'll make a small X with my finger here. And.

[Ryan Seacrest]

You saw it. Mr. Dingle has just punched a hole through a solid wall with his bare fist.

[Luther Dingle]

Now for my second demonstration. Oh, dear. Let me see. You've heard of karate, I suppose I could simply just line up the edge of my hand with the surface of this table. My opening, mind you, and with a single blow.

[Ryan Seacrest]

That's amazing. Would you call it mind over matter, Mr. Dingle?

[Luther Dingle]

Oh, no, I. I'd call it an example of matter over matter. It doesn't matter what's on my mind, even if it's nothing at all.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Okay, Dingle. Just don't go breaking all my tables in half. Okay?

[Joseph Callahan]

Hey, better sit down, buddy. Have yourself a drink. Hey, you want my seat?

[Luther Dingle]

Not yet. I feel fine. Splendid. These bar stools are bolted down, aren't they? If, let's say, I wanted to move one a few inches.

[Joseph Callahan]

See that? He ripped it right off the floor. And he didn't even break a sweat. What a guy. Go on, take my stool if you want.

[Luther Dingle]

Stand up.

[Joseph Callahan]

Sure. Why.

[Luther Dingle]

If you please.

[Joseph Callahan]

Why are you looking at me like that? Oh, no, wait a minute, Dingle. Ain't you ever heard of bygones being bygones? Put me down.

[Ryan Seacrest]

I see it, but I don't believe it. Ladies and gentlemen, the man at the bar is 160 or 70 pounds, and Dingle is lifting him like a rag doll, twirling him over his head with one hand.

[Joseph Callahan]

That ain't fun.

[Luther Dingle]

There. Now that didn't hurt too much, did it, pal? You're good as new. Well, almost. Going to give you a hand up, pal. Mr. Dingle, you're my hero.

[Joseph Callahan]

He can do anything.

[Luther Dingle]

We better not pick a fight with that fellow.

[Madam]

Had enough? Most inferior. We give him the strength of 300 men and he uses it for petty exhibitions. What shall we do about it? Give him 20 or 30 seconds more and then remove the power. Excellent. Then I think we'd best be off. Three more planets on the itinerary. One is particularly interesting. Contains only females. Set the ray for cancellation check.

[Luther Dingle]

And now, ladies and gentlemen, for my next feat, I think I'll lift this entire building. Well, at least the ceiling. And hence all the floors above it. Step aside, everyone.

[Ryan Seacrest]

I don't know if we have a clear shot of this, but he's standing on his tiptoes, extending his fingers to the ceiling.

[Luther Dingle]

Here we go. Let me try that again. I can't seem to.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Something's wrong.

[Luther Dingle]

No, I just felt strange there for a second. Let me try another bar stool. Remember, they're bolted to the floor. One finger. No, maybe two fingers. He's a fake. No waiters.

[Joseph Callahan]

This time was a trick.

[Ryan Seacrest]

What's the matter, Mr. Dingle?

[Luther Dingle]

The wall. Then. I'll punch another hole. Right about here.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Well, apparently we've all been the victims of a Charlotte cut. Are we still alive?

[Joseph Callahan]

Come on, let's get out of here. That was a trick, that's all.

[Luther Dingle]

Just some guys looking to get his picture in the paper.

[Anthony O'Toole]

All right, leave off with poor Dingle here. Get out of here. Hey, come on, Dingle, sit down. I'll get you some iodine for those knuckles.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Ladies and gentlemen, you have the station's apologies. We didn't realize that these were merely stage illusions and.

[Teen Advocate]

Okay, we're off the air.

[Ryan Seacrest]

That's a wrap. Off the air for good, I think. Let's go. So long, Samson.

[Madam]

Time to go. Yes. Wait. Who are they?

[Joseph Callahan]

Hello, boys.

[Madam]

Where are you two from?

[Joseph Callahan]

Venus. How about you?

[Madam]

Mars. Conducting your own experiments?

[Anthony O'Toole]

Yes.

[Joseph Callahan]

And you?

[Madam]

Sudden introduction of strength to subnormal Earth men. What is your experiment?

[Joseph Callahan]

Sudden introduction of an enhanced intelligence. Find any interesting subjects?

[Madam]

That one over there referred to as Dingle. He is certainly subphysical. Maybe submental too.

[Joseph Callahan]

A likely subject. Give him the intelligence quota, Ray.

[Madam]

How much?

[Joseph Callahan]

Oh, we'll make him approximately 500 times more intelligent than the average human.

[Luther Dingle]

What was that?

[Joseph Callahan]

Hey, Dingle, who do you like in the double header tonight?

[Luther Dingle]

Well, in this case, the laws of probability are interspersed with the final laws of chance. So through a process of calculus in a subdivision of grapple based physical motivation and a divisional annotating, in this case, of course, using the 2x factors as represented by the teams, the final score must of necessity be 5 to 3. Milwaukee in the opener, 6 to nothing, Dodgers in the nightcap.

[Joseph Callahan]

Yeah. What did he say? Search me. Callahan, let's have another drink.

[Anthony O'Toole]

It's on the house.

[Luther Dingle]

It is apparently on an advanced mathematical plan that the entire quantum theory of space and time relativity must of necessity.

[Madam]

Be equated with the parallelian law of definitive numerical dielectric laws of break and can further be notated.

[Narrator]

Exit. Mr. Luther Dingle, former vacuum cleaner salesman, strongest man on earth, and now mental giant. These latter powers will very likely be eliminated before too long, but Mr. Dingell has an appeal to extraterrestrial note takers as well as to frustrated and insolvent pet loosers. Offhand, I'd say that he's in for a great many extremely odd periods simply because there are so many inhabited planets to send down observers. And also because, of course, Mr. Dingle lives his life with one foot planted firmly in the Twilight Zone.

[Anthony O'Toole]

We'll return to the Twilight Zone after these words.

[Narrator]

You are about to enter another dimension, a dimension not only of sight and sound, but of mind, a journey into a wondrous land of imagination. Next stop, the Twilight Zone. Hi, this is Stacy Keach. I'd like to take a moment to tell you about our Twilight Zone website at Twilight Zone Resources radio.com@ twilightzoneradio.com, you'll find the latest information on these Twilight Zone radio dramas, including behind the scenes photographs, plus the newest product releases, trivia contests, ways to contact us, other Twilight Zone related info and merchandise, plus links to other fascinating websites. So make your next stop twilightzoneradio.com Visit.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Twilight zone radio.com to purchase these Twilight Zone radio dramas on cassette and CD, or call toll free 1-866-9989-zone. That's 1-866-989-9663.

[Anthony O'Toole]

Mr. Dingle the strong, starring Tim Kazarinsky with Stacy Keach as your narrator, was adapted for radio by Dennis Etchison and based on a script by Rod Serling. Heard in the cast were Peter Davaria, Doug James, Richard Hensel, Turk Muller, Rick Peoples, Adam Tangway, Martin Hughes, Maria Stephens, Peggy Roeder, Roger Wolski and Carl Amari. To learn more about the Twilight Zone radio dramas and to obtain audio cassettes and CDs of these programs, visit our website at twilightzoneradio.com the producers of the Twilight Zone wish to thank CBS Enterprises, Carol Serling, Dennis Etchison, Dick Brescia Associates, Claire Simon Casting Terry Jennings Exim Satellite Radio the American Forces radio and television service, Sirius Satellite Radio, our sponsors and our radio affiliates for helping make this series possible. This copyrighted radio series is produced and directed by Carl Amari and Roger Wolski for Falcon Picture Group. Doug James Speaking.

[Teen Advocate]

Use of flavored tobacco by teens is a crisis. Tobacco companies use flavors like cotton candy, watermelon ice and cool mint to hook kids like me. They seem harmless, but they are. Addiction to nicotine sets us up for a lifetime of health problems, organ legislators can do something about it. Passing Senate Bill 702A will keep flavored tobacco go away from kids. But there are just a few short weeks left for lawmakers to act. Take action to protect kids like me@ flavorshookorgonkids.org paid for by the Campaign for Tobacco Free Kids Action Fund.

[Ryan Seacrest]

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[Luther Dingle]

VGW Group void where prohibited by law.

[Ryan Seacrest]

21 + terms and conditions apply.