Upper Room, The 47xxxx 04 Slings And Arrows of Outrageous Fortune

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Upper Room, The Slings And Arrows of Outrageous Fortune"

Podcast Information

• Title: Harold's Old Time Radio
• Host/Author: Harolds Old Time Radio
• Episode Title: Upper Room, The Slings And Arrows of Outrageous Fortune
• Release Date: July 29, 2025
• Description: Reliving the Golden Age of Radio, this episode delves into family life and marital dynamics through engaging storytelling and insightful discussions.

---

Overview

In the episode titled "Upper Room, The Slings And Arrows of Outrageous Fortune," listeners are transported into the marital struggles of David and Elizabeth, a couple navigating the complexities of modern family life. The narrative explores common sources of marital conflict, communication breakdowns, and the application of practical advice from the marriage guidebook, "Building Your Marriage." Through their heated exchanges, the episode offers a poignant look at the challenges couples face and provides actionable strategies for resolving disputes constructively.

Characters

• David Gordon: A hardworking husband dealing with stress from work, particularly a new contract he's managing.
• Elizabeth Gordon: David's wife, who feels neglected and is grappling with insecurities about her marriage.
• Carlton E. Morse: The narrator who sets the scene and provides context for the unfolding drama.

Detailed Summary

Setting the Scene

The episode opens with Carlton E. Morse introducing the premise:

"The Upper Room presents... Where there is marriage, there is conflict." ([00:44])

He emphasizes the inevitability of disagreements in marriages and suggests that understanding and anticipating conflicts can reduce the likelihood of divorce.

Marital Strife Unfolds

David and Elizabeth engage in a heated argument that underscores their strained relationship. The tension arises from David's perceived inattentiveness and Elizabeth's feelings of neglect.

• Elizabeth's Frustration:

  "Oh, for crying out, Lyle. David, will you stop whistling between your teeth?" ([01:43])

• David's Defensiveness:

  "I guess it's a habit." ([01:51])

Elizabeth accuses David of being bored with her and favoring his new secretary, which heightens the conflict:

"You said yourself the other night that she's the prettiest secretary in the office." ([02:25])

David attempts to downplay the situation, highlighting his loyalty:

"Do I take her out to lunch? Do I come home late from the office because of her?" ([02:28])

Introducing "Building Your Marriage"

Amidst the argument, David retrieves "Building Your Marriage," a guidebook given to them at their wedding:

"Building your marriage. Oh, yeah, yeah, here it is. Now, where's that chapter on settling your differences?" ([03:00])

This booklet serves as a tool for conflict resolution, indicating the couple's prior efforts to strengthen their marriage.

Exploring the Eight Steps to Constructive Quarrel

David reads aloud from the booklet, outlining eight strategies for resolving marital conflicts:

1. Accept Conflict as Normal:

   "First, accept the fact of conflict without shame or pretending it isn't there. Remember that conflict is normal." ([08:38])

   Elizabeth acknowledges their acceptance but points out that they often fail to use silence constructively:

   "We do that... we don't go into silence to lick our wounds." ([08:50])

2. Understand Your Partner's Perspective:

   "Try to find out what the whole thing means to your mate. What's eating him or her, and why." ([08:50])

   David admits he failed to understand Elizabeth's deeper concerns:

   "If I'd found out about Mrs. Hazelton instead of letting you get my goat about the secretary." ([09:09])

3. Self-Reflection on Irritaton:

   "Ask yourself honestly, why are you annoyed or irritated? What does it actually matter?" ([09:22])

   Elizabeth questions her own traits that may irritate David:

   "Do I have any little personal traits that drive you crazy?" ([09:46])

4. Address Tensions Promptly: The couple agrees never to go to sleep angry, a habit they've developed:

   "Never go to sleep at night until all trouble between us is solved." ([10:11])

5. Take Immediate Action on Serious Conflicts:

   "If it's a serious conflict, try to agree on some next step towards solving it at once." ([10:34])

   They discuss potential serious conflicts, such as differing views on having children, and the importance of addressing them promptly to avoid resentment.

6. Help Each Other Save Face:

   "Help the other save face, feel he hasn't humiliated himself and that your love is there no matter what." ([11:23])

   David emphasizes keeping the focus on solving the problem rather than attacking each other's faults.

7. Practice Patience:

   "Be patient. Be willing to take a little time for solving difficulties. Don't expect miracles." ([11:52])

   The couple reflects on the necessity of patience in resolving ongoing issues.

8. Seek Competent Help When Needed:

   "When the whole situation gets beyond you, get some competent counseling help like your doctor or pastor." ([12:05])

   Elizabeth and David agree to seek outside assistance to prevent their conflicts from escalating:

   "Darling, let's make a promise. Let's not ever let our differences get so big. We have to get outside help." ([12:19])

Turning Point and Resolution

The argument reaches a turning point as both acknowledge their faults and the need for external support. They agree to commit to the strategies outlined in the booklet, aiming to fortify their marriage against future conflicts.

"We'll make our slogan. Cut your marital conflicts down in their youth and they'll never grow up to bite you." ([12:25])

This mutual agreement signifies their determination to work through their differences constructively.

Concluding Remarks

Carlton E. Morse wraps up the episode by reinforcing the importance of strong family and church ties:

"The church and the home are the basic rocks upon which the moral structure of this nation is built. They should be and must be one united foundation." ([14:13])

He encourages listeners to seek devotional help and maintain a united family front to uphold moral values.

Notable Quotes

• Elizabeth on Communication Breakdown:

  "You want to drive a person crazy, why don't you stop it?" ([01:55])

• David on Feeling Misunderstood:

  "Apparently, I can't talk to you in any tone of voice that has any sense of reason in it." ([02:52])

• On Accepting Conflict:

  "Remember that conflict is normal." ([08:38])

• Commitment to Resolving Differences:

  "Let's not ever let our differences get so big. We have to get outside help." ([12:19])

Insights and Lessons

• Communication is Key: Effective dialogue and understanding each other's perspectives are crucial in resolving marital conflicts.

• Conflict is Inevitable but Manageable: Recognizing that disagreements are a normal part of marriage can reduce the stigma and encourage constructive handling.

• Proactive Conflict Resolution: Addressing issues promptly prevents resentment from building up, fostering a healthier relationship dynamic.

• Seeking External Support: Utilizing counseling or guidance when conflicts become overwhelming can provide the necessary tools for couples to navigate challenges.

Conclusion

"Upper Room, The Slings And Arrows of Outrageous Fortune" serves as a relatable exploration of marital struggles, offering listeners both a narrative to empathize with and practical advice to apply in their own relationships. Through David and Elizabeth's journey, the episode underscores the importance of communication, understanding, and proactive conflict resolution in maintaining a strong and enduring marriage.

Transcript

[Ryan]

Hello, it is Ryan. And we could all use an extra bright spot in our day, couldn't we? Just to make up for things like sitting in traffic, doing the dishes, counting your steps. You know, all the mundane stuff. That is why I'm such a big fan of Chumba Casino. Chumba Casino has all your favorite social casino style games that you can play for free, anytime, anywhere with daily bonuses. So sign up [e-mail] that's chumbacasino.com no purchase necessary.

[David]

VGW Group void. We're prohibited by law 21/ terms and conditions apply.

[Carlton E. Morse]

The Upper Room presents so you want to stay married? Today's episode in this study of family life in the modern home is slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. Especially written and produced for the Upper Room by Carlton E. Morse. Featuring Jeanette Nolan and John McIntyre. Where there is marriage, there is conflict. There are still many people who believe that to be a cynical statement. On the other hand, students of family relationship insist that if more young married people understood in the beginning that some conflict in marriage is normal and inevitable, there would be fewer divorces in the long run. Too many young people immediately decide they made a bad marriage when they discover they have wide differences of opinions. Unlike tastes, habit and personal peculiarities which don't coincide. They're frightened and disillusioned. But not David and Elizabeth.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, for crying out, Lyle. David, will you stop whistling between your teeth?

[David]

Was I?

[Elizabeth]

You want to drive a person crazy, why don't you stop it?

[David]

I guess it's a habit.

[Elizabeth]

It's because you're bored with me.

[David]

Hey, darling, I can tell your interests.

[Elizabeth]

Are all down at the office. The minute you come in the house and I start to talk to you, that bored look comes on your face and you start whistling under your breath.

[David]

That's not true, Elizabeth.

[Elizabeth]

I think it is. And what's more, you're getting fond of that new little secretary. Hey, I wonder if you realize how often you bring her into the conversation.

[David]

Well, how do you like that? If I talked about the office and didn't bring her into the conversation, then you would have something to worry about. She's my secretary, isn't she?

[Elizabeth]

You said yourself the other night that she's the prettiest secretary in the office.

[David]

Well, of course I did. But what's that got to do with you and me? Do I take her out to lunch? Do I come home late from the office because of her? Have I neglected you or held out any of the paycheck or done any one single thing that would indicate to you that I was interested in the girl beyond the fact that she's a good secretary.

[Elizabeth]

David Gordon, you can't talk to me in that tone of voice.

[David]

Apparently, I can't talk to you in any tone of voice that has any sense of reason in it.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, so I'm unreasonable?

[David]

It looks like it.

[Elizabeth]

You see, we never should have gotten married in the first place.

[David]

Oh, stop saying things like that, David Gordon.

[Elizabeth]

Stop shouting.

[David]

I'm not shouting.

[Elizabeth]

You are shouting.

[David]

I'm not. I'm just tired from working all day and hungry and worried about the new contract I'm working on. I think it's a fine thing when a husband has to come home from the office and start battling with his wife.

[Elizabeth]

Well, maybe you'd rather come home to a house without a wife to upset your sensitive nerves. Why don't you answer? Would you? Well, all right, if that's how you want it. I still have a mother I can go home to. And I'd be glad to go.

[David]

Hey, Elizabeth. Hey, for the love of Mike, where's that book that Elizabeth's mother gave us when we got married? Around here someplace. Building your marriage. Building your marriage. Oh, yeah, yeah, here it is. Now, where's that chapter on settling your differences? Yeah, here it is. Settling your differences. Boy, Elizabeth and I have used this part of the booklet so much it's worn to a frazzle.

[Elizabeth]

Go away. I'm packing my suitcase.

[David]

I want to read you something.

[Elizabeth]

I don't want to hear it. David, get out of this bedroom.

[David]

I want to read you something from building your marriage.

[Elizabeth]

I don't want to build my marriage. I don't want to have anything further to do with you or your name or your house or anything. That reminds me what a mistake I made when I let you talk me into thinking you love me.

[David]

Elizabeth, that's silly.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, so it's silly.

[David]

You know it is. Hm.

[Elizabeth]

Mother will be very glad to hear that you think her daughter's a silly little fool.

[David]

I didn't say. Elizabeth, come out of the bathroom. Okay. Thank goodness for paper thin walls in these modern apartments. At least you can still hear me.

[Elizabeth]

Go away. I hate you.

[David]

It says here most fights start from some trivial thing.

[Elizabeth]

That just shows you how wrong that book can be.

[David]

It doesn't take much when one of the other person is all on edge.

[Elizabeth]

I was not on edge. I've been just as happy as I can be all day until you came home and started looking bored and whistling through your teeth.

[David]

It says here, husband and wives lash out. At each other oftentimes because they feel safe enough with each other to use their relationship as a safety valve to release tensions that have been piling up.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, so now I lash out at you.

[David]

Now I lashed out at you.

[Elizabeth]

You did not.

[David]

Yes, I did. I shouldn't have gotten mad when you said I was interested in the secretary. It's so trivial, so wrong. It wasn't important. And yet I did get mad and lash out because I've been worried about the contract I'm working on down at the office.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, don't be so noble.

[David]

I'm not.

[Elizabeth]

You are too. You know, I started all this because I yelled at you about whistling under your breath and looking bored.

[David]

I wasn't bored. Honestly. I was worried about the contract. My mind kept going back to what I ought to do if I'd keep office work down at the office and pay more attention to you when I come home.

[Elizabeth]

David Gordon, don't you say that it's my job to know when you come home from the office tired and worried and make things comfortable for you.

[David]

You do make things comfortable.

[Elizabeth]

I don't either. I know you don't care about that secretary. And I know you care more about me than you do about the office. I know all these things. But I've been so burned up all day that Mrs. Hazelton.

[David]

Well, the vice president's wife.

[Elizabeth]

Yes. She called up and asked me to lunch. And then she said she was going to tell me something for my own good. And then she hit me with it.

[David]

What did she say?

[Elizabeth]

She said I was too much of a homegirl for my husband's good. If I was more of a social butterfly.

[David]

What's she got to do with our lives? Who does she think she is?

[Elizabeth]

Anyway, that's what got me going. I kept thinking what a failure I was.

[David]

But you're not.

[Elizabeth]

And how I hadn't asked you for any new clothes in almost two years.

[David]

Oh, bless your heart.

[Elizabeth]

And what a cute girl was in your office.

[David]

You want to know something about her?

[Elizabeth]

What?

[David]

She's married to a great big bruiser of a taxicab driver and he's so crazy about her, he brings her to work in the morning, meets her for lunch and drives her home after work in the evening.

[Elizabeth]

Is it crazy in love or crazy with jealousy?

[David]

I don't know, but she likes it, whatever it is.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, David, I'm so sorry.

[David]

And you're not going home to Mother?

[Elizabeth]

I am not.

[David]

Well, I'm glad. Because it says here, don't run home to Mama the first Thing to remember in dealing with such conflicts is not to run out on them. The wife who runs home to mother and the man who seeks refuge at his club are settling nothing. At best, they're postponing the inevitable.

[Elizabeth]

Well, I've got a mother, but you haven't got a club. You ought to have one.

[David]

So I'll have a club that I'm not supposed to run to.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, come on out in the kitchen and bring the book.

[David]

Yeah, I'm starved.

[Elizabeth]

All I have to do is take things up. It'll only be a minute.

[David]

You want to hear some more out of this book?

[Elizabeth]

It's getting to be our bible. Yes. What else does it say about family conflicts?

[David]

Well, here's a whole chapter on how to quarrel constructively.

[Elizabeth]

You're kidding.

[David]

No, I'm not. The author lists eight good, solid ways to quarrel with wife or husband constructively.

[Elizabeth]

Well, for goodness sakes, let's have them.

[David]

First accept the fact of conflict without shame or pretending it isn't there. Remember that conflict is normal.

[Elizabeth]

We do that.

[David]

Yeah, I guess we do at that.

[Elizabeth]

If anybody'd been listening to us 10 minutes ago, they'd know we don't go into silence to lick our wounds.

[David]

Number two, try to find out what the whole thing means to your mate. What's eating him or her, and why. Try to keep calm as you can yourself while you encourage him to talk it all out.

[Elizabeth]

That's a hard one to do.

[David]

Yeah, and I didn't do it a few minutes ago. If I'd found out about Mrs. Hazelton instead of letting you get my goat about the secretary, you.

[Elizabeth]

Forgive me?

[David]

It's a pleasure.

[Elizabeth]

What's number three?

[David]

Number three, ask yourself honestly, why are you annoyed or irritated? What does it actually matter?

[Elizabeth]

I don't quite get that.

[David]

Well, it gives an illustration. For instance, Andrew found that he got riled whenever his wife set her mouth in a thin line because that habit was associated with a dominating ant who made his life miserable as a boy.

[Elizabeth]

Say, do I have any little personal traits that drive you crazy?

[David]

If you do, I'll dig them out and confront you with them. Do I?

[Elizabeth]

Yes, you whistle under your breath.

[David]

Honestly, I don't even know I'm doing it. I'll fight it, but you have to help me.

[Elizabeth]

And I'll promise not to go into a tantrum next time.

[David]

Number four, don't let tensions pile up day after day. Work them out as they come along.

[Elizabeth]

Well, I think we have a swell solution to that one. Never go to sleep at night until all trouble between Us is solved.

[David]

It's getting to be a habit. I couldn't go to sleep angry with you.

[Elizabeth]

Well, in some ways, maybe we're just as smart as the book. What's number five?

[David]

If it's a serious conflict, try to agree on some next step towards solving it at once. Get busy on it. Together fast.

[Elizabeth]

I wonder what they mean by that.

[David]

Oh, ouch. Did you burn yourself?

[Elizabeth]

No, but I got some of that steam on my wrist.

[David]

Here, let me drain those potatoes for you.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, thank you. Oh, swell. I can do it now. Oh, what was that about? In case of serious conflict, do something.

[David]

About it at once.

[Elizabeth]

Well, like what?

[David]

Well, maybe like the wife wants children and the husband doesn't.

[Elizabeth]

Say, that could break up a marriage.

[David]

It wouldn't need to if they maybe went and talked to their family doctor about it or their religious advisor or something like that. Maybe the reason the husband didn't want children was because he had such a bad time as a child himself. Or some other reason that was a little mental block in his emotional life and which could be removed by someone who understands those problems.

[Elizabeth]

But it has to be taken care of right away, huh?

[David]

Sure. Otherwise the basic conflict over children could develop other resentments so that in time nobody could get to the bottom of the trouble. And here's number six. Help the other save face, feel he hasn't humiliated himself and that your love is there no matter what. Avoid sniping at each other. Try to keep your mind on the problem and not on the other's faults.

[Elizabeth]

Uh huh. I think we've learned that already.

[David]

I do too. Number seven. Be patient. Be willing to take a little time for solving difficulties. Don't expect miracles. And finally, number eight, when the whole situation gets beyond you, get some competent.

[Elizabeth]

Counseling help like your doctor or pastor, I guess. Darling, let's make a promise. Let's not ever let our differences get so big. We have to get outside help.

[David]

It's a deal. We'll make our slogan. Cut your marital conflicts down in their youth and they'll never grow up to bite you. Oh, I love you, my dear.

[Elizabeth]

Hey, I. I forgot. My dinner's getting stone cold.

[David]

Oh, tragedy.

[Elizabeth]

You're not kidding. More family quarrels result from husbands holding up dinner. Now let's not get into that routine.

[David]

That's my wife who said that? And I love.

[Carlton E. Morse]

If the family ties in your home are uncertain and giving way, family worship will help to strengthen them. Worship in the church of your choice and have daily devotions in the home. The church and the home are the basic rocks upon which the moral structure of this nation is built. They should be and must be one united foundation. Ask your pastor for devotional helps or send a postcard to the upper Roof. Nashville, Tennessee Your announcer, Russell Thorson.

[Ryan]

Hello, it is Ryan and I was on a flight the other day playing one of my favorite social spin slot games on chumbacasino.com I looked over the person sitting next to me and you know what they were doing? They were also playing Chumba Casino. Everybody's loving having fun with it. Chumba Casino is home to hundreds of casino style games that you can play for free, anytime, anywhere. So sign up [e-mail] to claim your free welcome bonus. That's chumbacasino.com and live the Chumba Life.

[David]

Sponsored by Chumba Casino. No purchase necessary. VGW Group Void where prohibited by law, 21 + terms and conditions apply.