Awkward with Matan

Summary

Podcast Summary: History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas Episode: Awkward with Matan Release Date: May 13, 2025

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Introduction of Matan Evan

At the outset of the episode (01:26), hosts Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas introduce their enigmatic guest, Matan Evan, affectionately referred to as Viral Flooring. The duo humorously navigates Matan's mysterious background, ultimately settling on his origins in California. They highlight his "wild energy" and unique presence, setting the stage for an unconventional discussion.

Chris Distefano [01:26]: "We're here with Matan... He's from California."

Matan's Background and Business Ventures

The conversation delves into Matan's business endeavors, particularly his unconventional approach to real estate investment. Matan describes his strategy humorously:

Matan Evan [04:59]: "Walk around buildings and pretend to work there."

This satirical take on investing sparks a lighthearted debate about the legality and ethics of his methods, blending humor with mock-seriousness.

Health Challenges and Personal Struggles

Matan opens up about his health struggles, mentioning a sore throat and fever that hinder his participation (07:11). Despite feeling unwell, he expresses a commitment to his business, prompting concern from the hosts.

Yannis Pappas [07:25]: "With a sore throat."

The topic takes a somber turn when Matan makes distressing remarks about self-harm:

Matan Evan [11:09]: "I'm going to kill myself."

The hosts respond with empathy, encouraging him to seek professional help while maintaining the show's comedic tone.

Historical Interests and Political Views

A significant portion of the episode explores Matan's fascination with the 1940s and his controversial perspectives on World War II. He humorously expresses a preference for Axis powers, leading to discussions about historical conflicts and the absurd possibility of a third world war.

Matan Evan [08:58]: "Something in the 40s."

This segment blends historical commentary with satire, reflecting the show's aim to merge history with humor.

Dynamic Between Hosts and Matan

Throughout the episode, a playful yet tense dynamic unfolds between the hosts and Matan. Instances of physical humor and mock confrontations add layers to their interactions, showcasing a complex relationship filled with jest and underlying tensions.

Yannis Pappas [16:02]: "Some people will get a little physical, but not too bad."

Political Banter and Social Commentary

The hosts engage in spirited political discussions, with Matan sharing conservative viewpoints and critiquing modern policies like tariffs and immigration. The conversation often veers into exaggerated and humorous takes on serious topics, maintaining the show's comedic essence.

Matan Evan [19:03]: "I'm against that stuff."

Closing Remarks and Farewells

As the episode winds down, the hosts attempt to address various personal topics related to Matan's life and future plans. Despite ongoing humor-driven conflicts and chaotic interactions, they conclude with light-hearted farewells, reflecting the show's blend of comedy and candid conversations.

Yannis Pappas [54:14]: "Later, boys."

Notable Quotes

• Chris Distefano [03:39]: "Now, we brought you on because we want to talk about the deep relationship you guys have."

• Matan Evan [07:12]: "I'm going to kill myself."

• Yannis Pappas [09:23]: "But he didn't have just your show. He kicked one guy in the head and another in the stomach."

• Matan Evan [28:35]: "Do we have headphones? I can hear it."

• Matan Evan [49:25]: "I can speak viral flooring?"

Conclusion

Awkward with Matan offers a quintessential "History Hyenas" experience, intertwining humor with candid discussions on business, health, and politics. The episode highlights the unique chemistry between Chris, Yannis, and their guest, Matan, delivering an engaging and entertaining blend of laughter and unconventional insights.

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Timestamp Reference:

• 01:26 Introduction of Matan
• 04:59 Matan's business strategy
• 07:11 Health challenges
• 08:58 Historical interests
• 16:02 Host-guest dynamic
• 19:03 Political views
• 28:35 Attempted joke
• 49:25 Identity reveal
• 54:14 Farewells

Note: Timestamps are indicative and correspond to the transcript provided.

Transcript

[Chris Distefano]

Now at Chipotle, our all new Chipotle.

[Yannis Pappas]

Honey Chicken brings chipotle heat with a touch of sweet, seared smoked peppers and savory Mexican spices blended with a hint of pure honey for a perfectly balanced sauce. All combined with fresh, tender chicken hot off the grill.

[Chris Distefano]

Served up in your favorite burrito or.

[Yannis Pappas]

Bowl, new Chipotle Honey Chicken takes heat and sweet to a whole new level. But it's only at Chipotle for a limited time order.

[Chris Distefano]

Now in the app for pickup or delivery.

[Yannis Pappas]

Chipotle for real? You want to do it?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Okay. Can you move a little further that way in front of your Big Gulp? No, you won't be in the camera. That's fine.

[Matan Evan]

Is he on camera?

[Yannis Pappas]

He's. Yeah, I got the only one.

[Matan Evan]

I'm not going to be doing any talking on the show.

[Yannis Pappas]

All right. Okay. All right. We can't see you at all. That's.

[Chris Distefano]

That's fine. That's what he wants.

[Yannis Pappas]

That's what he wants. Yeah. I got a little piece of you now.

[Chris Distefano]

I got, like, half of your face.

[Yannis Pappas]

Okay.

[Chris Distefano]

What's up, everybody? Welcome to another episode of History Hyenas. We're here with Mario Andretti and his Make a Wish friend, Viral Flooring. His name is Vinyl. That's true. That's what I wanted to do it. We're here with Matan.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes.

[Chris Distefano]

He's from foreign country. He's from.

[Yannis Pappas]

He's from. I think he. He's from. We don't know.

[Chris Distefano]

We know.

[Yannis Pappas]

California.

[Chris Distefano]

Yes. Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

He could be a spy of some sort.

[Yannis Pappas]

We like him.

[Chris Distefano]

We like.

[Yannis Pappas]

We like him. He's got wild energy.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. And he wears that jacket every day.

[Yannis Pappas]

Which I like about that. That's very, like. It's like. He's like a Hasidic Jew like that.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. You know, it's funny is we did his podcast, and their outfits are exactly the same. It's almost like no time has passed.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

And I like Matan.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. He's a good guy. His lips are blue. He's drinking a Big Gulp.

[Matan Evan]

I'm sick.

[Chris Distefano]

Oh, you're sick. So you're drinking medicine. We can't hear you at all because you're not a mic, but that's fine.

[Matan Evan]

Give me a mic.

[Yannis Pappas]

We got one right here. Here we go. This kid's got one for you. But he may not be on camera, but he is on mic. So we got it all going on. And here he is. He's cutting up a straw.

[Chris Distefano]

He's cutting up a straw. And that is his manager, Vinyl Flooring. And Viral flooring.

[Yannis Pappas]

Viral Flooring, Yeah. Oh, you know what? It's funny because on our patreon. On our Patreon, we've had a couple of people as. Viral flooring.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Join the Patreon. So that's what. So, yeah, if they've joined, they picked a name. So I guess they're fans of your show and then they've come.

[Matan Evan]

I hope that my guys are giving you guys money.

[Yannis Pappas]

It's only five bucks.

[Chris Distefano]

It's only five bucks.

[Matan Evan]

That's way too much for this.

[Chris Distefano]

That is true.

[Yannis Pappas]

I know.

[Chris Distefano]

Now, we brought you on because we want to talk about the deep relationship you guys have. I know that he's made you a star and I wanted to know, where did you discover him? That's right.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes.

[Chris Distefano]

So where did you. Where did. Where did you meet? Viral flooring.

[Matan Evan]

He knows the story better than I do.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. But apparently I don't think he. Yeah, I don't think he talks. I think he just smirks.

[Matan Evan]

He's gonna be talking a lot today.

[Chris Distefano]

He does talk a lot today. And we did bring you a straw so you can cut it up because we know you're big on that.

[Matan Evan]

Yes.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. And do you want a breakfast or no?

[Yannis Pappas]

We got sweet potato egg wrap, maybe for him. Want somebody? No.

[Chris Distefano]

Ok. Now, here's the thing is I heard you say that you're 17, but I heard, like Emmanuel Lewis, you have that disease and you're actually 46. Like Andy Milonakis.

[Matan Evan]

No, no. I just really.

[Chris Distefano]

Is that from the notes from Viral Flooring Today? He told us to talk about that.

[Matan Evan]

Not vinyl.

[Chris Distefano]

I'm sorry. Viral.

[Yannis Pappas]

Viral. Viral.

[Chris Distefano]

Viral. I have a lisp. It comes out as viral. I sometimes speak with an Asian accent. Viral. It's hard. Ours are hard for me. We just did an episode about the trade war with China. Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Ok. Are you okay with the tariffs happening and all that? How. How do you feel about it?

[Matan Evan]

That one he knows better than me. Let's see.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. What do you think about the tariffs happening?

[Yannis Pappas]

They're good.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

How are they going to affect Romy people? There you go.

[Yannis Pappas]

I respect it. I respect it.

[Matan Evan]

You might want to turn his mic down. He's being a little loud.

[Yannis Pappas]

Loud.

[Chris Distefano]

Very loud today.

[Yannis Pappas]

What? You have very good hair. I like your hair a lot. Do. What do you use? Pert Plus. No. Yeah, yeah. Once in a while.

[Chris Distefano]

Once.

[Matan Evan]

Were you talking to me or him?

[Yannis Pappas]

You.

[Matan Evan]

Oh, no, I. I don't shower till. Too much time. Down the drain.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, down the drain. I like that.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

That brain yeah, that wasn't what I was going for, but.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, but it works.

[Yannis Pappas]

What about. So what about movies? What movies have you seen lately?

[Matan Evan]

No movies, no shower, no brushing teeth, no tv. Just business buildings.

[Yannis Pappas]

Right. So what do you build? Oh, what's the most recent business?

[Matan Evan]

Walk around buildings and pretend to work there.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, nice.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, I like that.

[Matan Evan]

Asking for change in the lobby.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes. What you did, you asked. You got some change from some people out here today. So we. We.

[Matan Evan]

You want to show them what we got?

[Yannis Pappas]

Let's see it.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Getting change. Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Now while he gets to change. You're adopted. What is it like being. Having adoptive parents? Do they love you? Yeah, not bad.

[Yannis Pappas]

Look, there it is. Those are. That's real. So you got 5, 15, 18, 28 cents.

[Matan Evan]

28. Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, and a dollar.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, that wasn't from here. I guess he's just holding on to that.

[Yannis Pappas]

The rip dollar.

[Chris Distefano]

Rip dollar.

[Yannis Pappas]

There it is. Yeah, Good for you.

[Matan Evan]

Here's the other half.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. So, yeah, that's. That looks like it's about to be the global economy right there.

[Yannis Pappas]

That's it.

[Chris Distefano]

That's what it looks like on the table.

[Yannis Pappas]

Do you have your money invested somewhere?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

You guys, he handles my money for me.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

He puts it into buildings.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes. Yeah, that's probably a safe place for it to be right now. In buildings. Yeah, Yeah, I. Yeah, we're. We were talking about that a lot today. What about bluechew? Use bluechew.

[Matan Evan]

You're going to do a, like a deco advertisement with a 17 year old. It's a little weird.

[Chris Distefano]

Is he 17?

[Yannis Pappas]

I don't think he really is.

[Matan Evan]

I don't know. I really am 17.

[Chris Distefano]

You're 17?

[Matan Evan]

I was born in 2007.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, that's right. That would make you 17.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, I'm 17.

[Chris Distefano]

So we're a little weird. So history for you would be like if we talk about 9 11. 911 would be history for you maybe.

[Matan Evan]

Not invest in buildings here.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. Right.

[Chris Distefano]

You don't want to invest.

[Yannis Pappas]

Where's the best place to invest in buildings, in your opinion?

[Matan Evan]

They're building. Big one.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. Where, what country would you go?

[Matan Evan]

Yeah. Buildings and building.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. Yeah, right.

[Chris Distefano]

That's what I would like. Dubai.

[Yannis Pappas]

Right, Maybe Dubai. That would be a good one.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. So. But now you've been in New York for a week. We saw you last week.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

And now you go back to where's home?

[Matan Evan]

Los Angeles.

[Yannis Pappas]

And you go back to Los Angeles.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

And then how did you get such a OC accent? Like a very California Accent like that. How does he. How did he get that accent? And are you feeling better?

[Matan Evan]

No.

[Chris Distefano]

No.

[Yannis Pappas]

What do you feel? What are the symptoms?

[Matan Evan]

My throat hurts. I have a fever. Coughing.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, yeah. But you came anyway, and we appreciate that.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, I didn't want to cancel because business, always. Right, business. And I got. I was right. I made some money.

[Chris Distefano]

Right.

[Yannis Pappas]

And you fly. You're gonna have to fly home five, six hours now.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

With a sore throat.

[Matan Evan]

Maybe I'll be better in about two days. It's just for me.

[Yannis Pappas]

Take it.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, or.

[Matan Evan]

Who was this for?

[Yannis Pappas]

It could be for you.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, it's for you.

[Matan Evan]

Hold on to that. For me?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

You like that? Do you want oatmeal?

[Chris Distefano]

You want to taste that for him? Make sure it's okay.

[Yannis Pappas]

You got a good time. His tongue is good, isn't it? Yeah. Is he also 17?

[Matan Evan]

No, he's like 80.

[Yannis Pappas]

So him we could do the Bluetooth ads with.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, he's from the 80s.

[Yannis Pappas]

You're from the 80s?

[Chris Distefano]

From the 80s.

[Yannis Pappas]

That's awesome. Like us. Well, like me, I'm from the 80s. Yanni's from the 70s.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

No, not that he was born in the 80s. He's from the 80s. Oh, you're at the 80s yesterday.

[Chris Distefano]

Oh, he was in the 80s yesterday.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

He's got a time machine.

[Matan Evan]

Yep.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

You guys are like the franks and beans version of Bill and Ted's Adventure. Yeah, go ahead.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, there it is.

[Chris Distefano]

Did you get that shirt from Zara?

[Matan Evan]

The big building?

[Chris Distefano]

From a big building? Yeah, it was in a big building. Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Do you like big buildings? Yeah, yeah, I like it.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, it's good, man. Me, too.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Biggest building I was ever in. I was, I went to the top of that building in Chicago, the John Hancock.

[Matan Evan]

I don't know that one. I, I, they don't let me into any of the buildings I try to go to, but just, I'll stay around outside.

[Yannis Pappas]

Right, right.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Why is that? Do you feel like this discrimination against you?

[Matan Evan]

I mean, I don't think it helps to go to the guy, like the security guard at the door and tell him if he doesn't let me in.

[Chris Distefano]

What's your favorite thing from history?

[Matan Evan]

From history, yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

What do you like the best?

[Matan Evan]

Something in the 40s.

[Chris Distefano]

What do you, what's, oh, yeah, that's nice.

[Yannis Pappas]

1940S.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

What do you like? Like World War II?

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, those guys.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, you like those guys?

[Yannis Pappas]

Who did you want to win?

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, we lost.

[Chris Distefano]

You lost. Yeah, I know. That was.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

So you were a big. You were a big Axis power guy.

[Matan Evan]

I don't. I don't know. Yeah, definitely not the Allies.

[Chris Distefano]

Not the allies.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. You don't want them to win.

[Chris Distefano]

No.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, they did.

[Matan Evan]

It's over now.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. What can you do? And they. People say because of the stuff going on now that we're going to go into the third one. But they always say that. People been saying World War III forever. Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

I think we can avoid it if that guy, maybe he's incubated in Argentina and he's to clear it.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. Yes, that's right.

[Yannis Pappas]

We were talking about that last week. That there's proof that that happened.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

That the Nazis are in Argentina.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

Well, I didn't say that. I was just talking about the one.

[Chris Distefano]

No, he's talking. No, he's talking about the big guy. Nobody really knows his name. That's why he didn't know his name. There's a guy in Argentina. Oh, that's right Smart. This kid knows the Internet good.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

He was promoted out of the guest they pick.

[Chris Distefano]

No.

[Matan Evan]

Have you do it on the episode?

[Chris Distefano]

No, we don't have to.

[Yannis Pappas]

No, no, no, no, no. We just had it up because we were going to read the ads before but we were. You were waiting in the hallway for. For too long and we felt bad.

[Chris Distefano]

I just. We keep. I like to keep it up because it keeps me calm and the ball. Something about the Bluetooth addict.

[Yannis Pappas]

Bluetooth does keep us all common. We like tablets made here.

[Matan Evan]

Disgusting product. Well, it actually. Absolutely horrible.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

Nobody should buy it.

[Yannis Pappas]

No, right.

[Matan Evan]

If nothing. No, no. If they do, they shouldn't use your code because they shouldn't buy it in the first place.

[Yannis Pappas]

Well, the good.

[Matan Evan]

The horrible thing. I know a guy who used it. He said it fell off.

[Yannis Pappas]

Really?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Well, the good news about don't use it.

[Matan Evan]

Don't use that.

[Yannis Pappas]

You don't have to use the code. You could just go to bluetooth.com. you don't even have to use a code.

[Chris Distefano]

You don't need this code.

[Matan Evan]

No, don't. Don't even go to their website. It's a bad website.

[Yannis Pappas]

Right.

[Chris Distefano]

Do you have sponsors on your podcast?

[Matan Evan]

I have one. I don't think he's. He's not going to renew.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, yeah?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

Why I talk about the sponsor like that.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, but that's okay. It's your version of it.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, yeah. Well, I agree with that, but they just don't share that opinion.

[Yannis Pappas]

No, I know. Like the. The bosses here, the people own this building were telling us that we need to get you in. Because they were saying if you kept asking people for a change, they were going to throw you out the window. Because they're off you guys. But we saved you.

[Matan Evan]

But I told him. That doesn't make sense. Because I told the guy here, the guy who owns this building, I said I would like him to open the window so I can jump off and kill myself. Every day I'm waking up in pain. I don't like leaving. I'm praying that I won't wake up in the morning. But it hasn't worked. So now I'm going to take it into my own hands.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

How are you going to do it?

[Matan Evan]

I'm going to kill myself.

[Chris Distefano]

And we don't support that. If you're struggling with. Just call a hotline.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. Go to betterhelp.com they also sponsor the pod.

[Matan Evan]

Those guys are scammers, though. You guys have.

[Chris Distefano]

No, we don't have them.

[Matan Evan]

Okay.

[Chris Distefano]

We haven't had them yet.

[Yannis Pappas]

I think we have betterhelp.

[Chris Distefano]

Have we had them? No, no. Come in.

[Matan Evan]

They'll probably come scammers or No.

[Yannis Pappas]

I don't know what I said, but I don't know.

[Matan Evan]

Is it really true about your sponsors?

[Chris Distefano]

But we haven't had them.

[Matan Evan]

You'll just promote any bullshit to your guys.

[Chris Distefano]

We haven't. We did.

[Yannis Pappas]

We did have that mindset for a while, but now it's less because the ad reads. Sometimes you read these companies and we're like, we don't know what. We don't know what they're talking about. And then it's disingenuous. So we're trying to be. We want to be more genuine.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, well, he just opposed what you just said. He said he has no idea.

[Yannis Pappas]

We don't have better help. We know about the other sponsors.

[Matan Evan]

While you eat.

[Chris Distefano]

I can't digest unless I chew it open.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

I have a condition.

[Yannis Pappas]

Do you?

[Chris Distefano]

Thank you.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, shit. Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

I wonder who wears the pants in this relationship. You're going to let him do that?

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. Because when we came on your podcast last week, you guys were fighting with each other physically.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Started hitting him, kicks him. Yeah. But that's nice viral flooring.

[Chris Distefano]

There's a lot of upside in my career. Can I. Can I.

[Matan Evan]

From my podcast to the guy in the lobby?

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

You did?

[Matan Evan]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Well, he looks like he needs him.

[Matan Evan]

Which one?

[Chris Distefano]

The guy in the lobby.

[Matan Evan]

Are we talking about the same guy?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

What am I talking about?

[Chris Distefano]

The guy sitting at the desk.

[Matan Evan]

Nope.

[Chris Distefano]

The transgender gentleman.

[Matan Evan]

There's no transgender gentleman. So then you're funny.

[Chris Distefano]

So then you're. No, you're in the wrong building.

[Matan Evan]

Clearly, I'm in the right building.

[Chris Distefano]

I don't know. Are you?

[Matan Evan]

How many sponsors do you guys have? Usually?

[Yannis Pappas]

I think two or three, but we're gonna. I think while.

[Matan Evan]

You're willing to take more than two or three.

[Yannis Pappas]

No, we were at one point, but I think it's just.

[Matan Evan]

It's too much get them anymore.

[Yannis Pappas]

It's. Well, we usually get about two, I would say, where two is good for us.

[Matan Evan]

Would you sell five if you could?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're American.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

But we don't have any on this because of child labor laws. You're 17, and so we can't promote any. Brian's out here, right?

[Matan Evan]

I promote gambling.

[Chris Distefano]

Have you been seven?

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

For a long time.

[Yannis Pappas]

What's your favorite gambling site?

[Matan Evan]

Oh, I. I'm not allowed to say, like, that. I'm gambling, but he's gambling.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes.

[Chris Distefano]

Because he's older.

[Yannis Pappas]

He's older. He's 20. In his 20s or in his 80s, as you said, he's from the 80s.

[Chris Distefano]

Oh, he's from there.

[Yannis Pappas]

From the 80s, right. All right.

[Matan Evan]

Trophier from the 80s yesterday.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

And where. Where. What decade are you from now?

[Matan Evan]

The day before that, he was in the 60s.

[Chris Distefano]

Whoa. Crazy dude.

[Yannis Pappas]

He went fast.

[Chris Distefano]

You went from the 60s, huh? To the 80s? Why'd you skip the 70s? Because 7. 8. 8. Well, no, that's a good one.

[Yannis Pappas]

I like it.

[Chris Distefano]

It's from. That joke's from the 60s.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

And we see it. What about Ms. Rachel? Do you like Ms. Rachel?

[Matan Evan]

Who's Ms. Rachel?

[Yannis Pappas]

She's on YouTube. She does, like, a lot. She's like the Mr. Rogers.

[Matan Evan]

No, I prefer the Patrick Star Show.

[Yannis Pappas]

What's. I don't know which one that is.

[Matan Evan]

He's a spin off of SpongeBob. He's the best.

[Yannis Pappas]

The Patrick Star Show.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Can we pull it up?

[Matan Evan]

Jess, pull up the Patrick Star Show.

[Yannis Pappas]

We like this. I want to watch it because I'm looking for new content.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Patrick Star.

[Matan Evan]

Patrick got his own show in the past. Lives with his family. His sister, his mother, his grandfather and his father. And his grandfather is on the wheels. Like, when they introduce him, he's spinning around his room on a cart.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, I like that. That's something different. What are you gonna do today? What is your day like? I'm always very interested in that with you.

[Matan Evan]

I don't have any other plans for today. Just walk around and take pictures of buildings.

[Yannis Pappas]

Okay.

[Matan Evan]

And then post it and say that it's mine.

[Yannis Pappas]

Got it.

[Matan Evan]

Some guy in another country might believe it.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes.

[Matan Evan]

That's his grandfather. You see that?

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

The one all the way to the left?

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes. Nice, dude. What's your favorite building so far in New York that you've seen?

[Matan Evan]

The big one.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. And you like that?

[Chris Distefano]

Empire State Building.

[Yannis Pappas]

The big one?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

I don't know what the name is.

[Yannis Pappas]

But it's the big, big one.

[Matan Evan]

My building.

[Chris Distefano]

Right on that one.

[Yannis Pappas]

Do you only own buildings in New York?

[Matan Evan]

Huh?

[Yannis Pappas]

Where else do you own buildings?

[Matan Evan]

Oh, yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

You own buildings in a lot of places. Yeah, I like it.

[Yannis Pappas]

You guys do too. That's nice.

[Chris Distefano]

Does he do the deals for you or how does that work? I don't know if that's allowed. Is that allowed?

[Yannis Pappas]

You can't throw plastic knives.

[Chris Distefano]

Plastic knives, it's bad.

[Matan Evan]

I was hoping it was metal.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, it was just plastic.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. What have you ever gotten? Has anyone ever physically assaulted you because of, like, you're a building owner?

[Matan Evan]

Not usually. I've got. We got pretty close. One guest trained to slap my former co host.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh.

[Matan Evan]

Some people will get a little physical, but not. Not too bad.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, we.

[Matan Evan]

I don't know if it'll have released at one point, but we did one the other day with this guy. I don't want to say the guest name yet, but he kicked one of the guys in the head and then he punched another in the stomach. That really happened.

[Yannis Pappas]

And like, if he wasn't messing around.

[Matan Evan]

It was no joking.

[Yannis Pappas]

Like when we did your pod, we were messing around. We threw each other over the tables and. But we were just messing around. He was being serious.

[Matan Evan]

He was ser.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, man. There's a guy. Are your friends okay?

[Matan Evan]

The guy who got kicked in the head wasn't my guy. I just. It was a mutual, like, knowing guy of another one, so I don't know how he's doing.

[Yannis Pappas]

Are they gonna. And you're gonna release that episode?

[Matan Evan]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. Wow.

[Matan Evan]

Probably next month or two.

[Yannis Pappas]

Wow.

[Chris Distefano]

Do you ever get people on the show who don't go along with your. With your guys style?

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, I had one maybe a couple days ago with these two guys came on.

[Chris Distefano]

Two guys that look like us?

[Matan Evan]

Yeah. You guys.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, it was us.

[Yannis Pappas]

No, we went along with it. You don't think so we. You don't think we did a good enough job with you. Okay.

[Matan Evan]

Confrontational about it. I won't stand my ground on it.

[Yannis Pappas]

So. Okay, so today's buildings. Taking pictures, getting there, posting them.

[Matan Evan]

Patrick Starr.

[Yannis Pappas]

Patrick Starr.

[Matan Evan]

I watch when I'm going to sleep in the hotel.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, how was the hotel? Was it a nice building?

[Matan Evan]

It's a big one, but the problem is it smells bad.

[Yannis Pappas]

Ah.

[Matan Evan]

But it was not so expensive. So it's a good deal.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

Huh.

[Yannis Pappas]

So you did it. You did it. Why? Because you were saying, I want to save a little bit of money right now because you'd rather invest in buildings.

[Chris Distefano]

Can you be sure that the building smells bad, or is it you guys smelling bad inside the building? So you think that the building.

[Yannis Pappas]

They're clean. They're clean.

[Matan Evan]

The air condition. I also hopefully smell bad, but that's besides the point.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

No, but you're going for it. But his hair is clean. His hair looks good. He's got good hair. The kid has good hair.

[Chris Distefano]

He's got a good set of hair.

[Yannis Pappas]

You had hair like that when you were younger. There's a picture of Yanni from when he's in his.

[Chris Distefano]

Patrick. Yeah, there he is.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

Can you turn on an episode? There's a free episode on YouTube.

[Yannis Pappas]

Will we get demonetized for that? For watching something else?

[Matan Evan]

I'm not sure. Not my channel. So it's not really my problem if I want it enough.

[Yannis Pappas]

Right?

[Chris Distefano]

That's a good.

[Yannis Pappas]

That's a good point. You know what?

[Matan Evan]

I feel like Turn on that one.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

You want to just watch this for two hours?

[Matan Evan]

Do we have headphones? I can hear it.

[Yannis Pappas]

No, that's one thing we don't have.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, we don't have.

[Yannis Pappas]

Do you.

[Chris Distefano]

That's spongebob.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes. And this is Patrick Starr.

[Chris Distefano]

And Patrick Starr's that guy.

[Matan Evan]

That's Ms. Puff.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

What would you do if we wanted to put this episode just on Patreon and not on YouTube? Would that make you upset if we wanted to monetize a little upsetting if we want to just make money off you?

[Matan Evan]

I think that that's what it is anyways. I mean, I don't think you guys really care about the guest. You guys would have on a homeless guy if you got more money.

[Yannis Pappas]

Right.

[Matan Evan]

I actually. That I shouldn't say that. I really actually had on a homeless guy.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. Right. And what about you? Do you feel that way about you and your guests? Like you'll have on someone who you think will just make you more money.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. Right. Because you need.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, it's building needs money. Yeah. Buy those buildings. You got to get money.

[Matan Evan]

Tough to be a landlord.

[Chris Distefano]

It is really to be a landlord.

[Yannis Pappas]

Especially in New York, because, you know, you can't throw anybody out yeah, that's what they want. That's the big problem with landlords in New York. They say we're not allowed to evict anyone. Yeah, but others do it, but it's harder.

[Matan Evan]

No.

[Yannis Pappas]

What do you do?

[Matan Evan]

You just have to get them out.

[Yannis Pappas]

But how do you get them out? Get physical.

[Matan Evan]

Explore the building.

[Yannis Pappas]

Interesting.

[Chris Distefano]

Maybe that's a 911. They were just trying to get people out.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, you think they were?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. Yeah, that's a good theory. You think you're just trying to get tenants out? 9 11. You okay?

[Yannis Pappas]

He's sick. He's sick.

[Matan Evan]

Patrick.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, there's patrick there. Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

SpongeBob square pants.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, SpongeBob square pants.

[Chris Distefano]

Do you watch any adult shows as well?

[Matan Evan]

That's an adult show.

[Chris Distefano]

I want to know about your parents. Who are your parents?

[Yannis Pappas]

He won't say.

[Chris Distefano]

He won't say.

[Yannis Pappas]

You know what a movie I watched on the plane coming back from Spokane? The Secret of the Sacred Fig Tree. About the movie. They filmed it in Tehran. Iran. Pretty good.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, Tehran.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, Tehran.

[Matan Evan]

Go over history or no.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. What's your. Well, the 1940s, you said. Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

You like the 40s?

[Yannis Pappas]

You like that?

[Matan Evan]

I liked it until the late 40s.

[Chris Distefano]

Right. Until they. Your side lost, you said.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. The late forties was not.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, but you must be liking it now, with the comeback. Do you feel like your side's making a comeback?

[Matan Evan]

It's not really a comeback, no. They come back online. It doesn't.

[Chris Distefano]

It's not the real.

[Matan Evan]

Coming to real life.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

So what do you think? Do you think, though, eventually, in your lifetime, you will make a comeback for real?

[Matan Evan]

Hopefully. If I can go into politics.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. What kind of contribution do you want to make towards that effort? You want to kill?

[Matan Evan]

I didn't say nothing.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, right.

[Chris Distefano]

You didn't say anything.

[Matan Evan]

Padrick.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. Well, he's gone now. Do you know what NAFTA is? Are you a big fan of nafta?

[Matan Evan]

The NASDAQ building.

[Yannis Pappas]

That's right, yes.

[Chris Distefano]

NASDAQ building.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes.

[Chris Distefano]

Are you big on that?

[Matan Evan]

Whoa, whoa.

[Chris Distefano]

It's a big building.

[Yannis Pappas]

It's a big one. Yeah. Yeah. I was thinking, too, you know, in the late 1940s, what happened was, is a lot of you guys lost, and then when you went back to your countries, you guys got beat up a lot and killed even at times.

[Matan Evan]

Who are you talking about?

[Yannis Pappas]

The guys. You're the side that lost in the 40s.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

They didn't get. The Germans didn't get attacked, did they? How do you know that?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, they did.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

I wasn't aware. Next.

[Chris Distefano]

Can you. Can you tell us where you met your manager at all?

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, I know I'm. Since I little kid.

[Chris Distefano]

Oh, you know him since you guys were little kids?

[Matan Evan]

Yeah. Well, he's older than me. Like, he been managing me since I was four.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh. Whoa. Oh, nice.

[Chris Distefano]

But you just said you've known each other since you were little kids. Both you.

[Matan Evan]

No, since I was a little kid.

[Chris Distefano]

Oh.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, and he's teeth. That's weird though, right? To have a little kid? What? You saw the talent in him at 4. That's pretty impressive. You got a good eye.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. What are you doing looking at little kids like that so much? You know?

[Yannis Pappas]

True.

[Chris Distefano]

That's tough.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh. So no girlfriend, no boyfriend. Just you.

[Matan Evan]

Gay? Some. I don't. I don't like talking to women sometimes. Like, especially on the subway here, there's a lot of people. I'll take photos of their ass, but I won't talk to them.

[Chris Distefano]

Legal, I think, is that.

[Yannis Pappas]

I don't know if it's illegal. He's 17. I don't know. He could cut.

[Matan Evan]

Not illegal.

[Chris Distefano]

No.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, I don't think it is. Oh, there's Pat.

[Chris Distefano]

No. Yeah, I think you're okay.

[Yannis Pappas]

What about. How do you have a problem with people from Lebanon?

[Matan Evan]

From Lebanon? Why would I have an issue?

[Yannis Pappas]

He's from Lebanon.

[Matan Evan]

I don't have an issue with that.

[Yannis Pappas]

You don't have an issue with anybody.

[Matan Evan]

He was next door. I'd have an issue.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, like the.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes, because you have the building, right?

[Chris Distefano]

No, no, no, he doesn't. Like next door to Lebanon.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, next door to Lebanon. Yeah. Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

Why were you even. Why is he adjusting? Put the angle on him, please.

[Yannis Pappas]

At New Balance, we believe if you.

[Chris Distefano]

Run, you're a runner, however you choose to do it.

[Yannis Pappas]

Because when you're not worried about doing.

[Chris Distefano]

Things the right way, you're free to discover your way.

[Yannis Pappas]

And that's what running's all about.

[Chris Distefano]

Run your [e-mail].

[Yannis Pappas]

Running. She's made up her mind to live pretty smart.

[Chris Distefano]

Learn to budget responsibly right from the start. She spends a little less, inputs more into savings. Keeps her blood pressure low and credit score raises. She's cutting debt right out of her life. She tracks her cash flow on a spreadsheet at night.

[Yannis Pappas]

Boring money moves.

[Chris Distefano]

Make kinda lame songs, but they sound.

[Yannis Pappas]

Pretty sweet to your wallet.

[Chris Distefano]

BNC Bank. Brilliantly boring since 1865.

[Yannis Pappas]

He is. He's readjusting it to make it to make it better.

[Chris Distefano]

Can you pass my cell phone? Chris?

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh. Oh. God damn it.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, they're gonna take it again. They take stuff.

[Yannis Pappas]

They should have whispered it.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, they don't. They don't rely on subscriptions or advertisers. They rely on theft. Theft. That's what they do.

[Yannis Pappas]

He's not. Yeah, he'll give you back his phone.

[Chris Distefano]

It depends. He's going to look through. He's going to look at.

[Matan Evan]

Try to get in it first was the login.

[Chris Distefano]

I'm not going to tell you the login.

[Yannis Pappas]

1776. Those are all my logins and passwords. If you ever want to break into anything that I own, you just put in 1776 and you're in. His face is too small. No, he didn't wear that for our episode.

[Chris Distefano]

No, he had that same shirt on.

[Yannis Pappas]

Same shirt on.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. It's a jacket.

[Yannis Pappas]

It looks good. I like it.

[Chris Distefano]

It's a jacket.

[Matan Evan]

Why can't you wear this?

[Yannis Pappas]

I can't believe somebody hit you.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Or hit your guys.

[Chris Distefano]

What do you want to be when you grow up?

[Yannis Pappas]

Building owner.

[Chris Distefano]

Building owner? Yeah. Really? He nodded.

[Matan Evan]

He didn't kick us. He kicked one guy in the head. I mean, he didn't hit us. Kicked a guy in the head.

[Yannis Pappas]

In the head. So he must have been good at, like, martial arts or something.

[Matan Evan]

No, the guy jumped on him and he landed on the ground. So he got scared and he kicked him in the head.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, man. What's the guy who got kicked in the head? Okay, though.

[Matan Evan]

That's a guy. I don't know.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, so you don't know?

[Matan Evan]

I. I mean, maybe, but it's not really my responsibility.

[Yannis Pappas]

But it wasn't at your show.

[Matan Evan]

That was my show.

[Chris Distefano]

So it is your responsibility.

[Matan Evan]

But I don't know the guy, so I don't care.

[Chris Distefano]

Right, but it is technically your responsibility.

[Matan Evan]

I mean, if it helps him, I'll send those pictures to him.

[Yannis Pappas]

What happens if you go to jail? What would you do?

[Matan Evan]

I got arrested before, but I don't know. I. I would try to get out, I guess.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

You would just try to escape?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

I'll hire one of those guys I'm trying to get rid of.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, yeah. I like that.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. Now, are these guys. You had this guy and the other guy. Are they. Are they replaceable or are these guys irreplaceable in your life? Your manager and the.

[Matan Evan]

The other guys in the lobby. They're not replaceable.

[Chris Distefano]

They're not replaceable?

[Matan Evan]

No.

[Chris Distefano]

So you're with them. So this guy's with you forever.

[Matan Evan]

I hope not, but. Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

The answer is yes.

[Chris Distefano]

The answer is yes. But you hope not as well, right? Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Makes sense.

[Chris Distefano]

That makes sense. The thing about you is I. You know, you make a lot of sense, and that's what I like about you is, like, it's easy to follow.

[Yannis Pappas]

This is a good one. You're gonna like.

[Chris Distefano]

This one you're gonna like.

[Yannis Pappas]

But it might hurt your throat. Yeah, okay.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, my throat hurts. That's why I'm only drinking.

[Yannis Pappas]

That's right. And that's good.

[Matan Evan]

Probably sound a little bit different, too.

[Yannis Pappas]

And that should. That should help your throat. That. I feel like that'll be healthy for you, the sugar and that's not a joke.

[Matan Evan]

I'm really sick. I had a fever yesterday.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

No, I'm going to get your kids sick?

[Chris Distefano]

Yes. How are you going to do that?

[Yannis Pappas]

Because he wants to transfer it.

[Chris Distefano]

Oh, you're going to get me sick, and then I'll get together and that'll make you happy?

[Matan Evan]

Super happy.

[Chris Distefano]

Why?

[Matan Evan]

Just to know I got somebody. It wasn't just me suffering.

[Chris Distefano]

Oh, yeah. Spread it around.

[Yannis Pappas]

I like that. I respect that from you.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. Misery loves company, right?

[Matan Evan]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Is that your breakfast today? Just the big goal so far.

[Matan Evan]

Yep.

[Yannis Pappas]

Nice.

[Chris Distefano]

So today you're just gonna.

[Matan Evan]

Patrick.

[Chris Distefano]

He's gone. So you're gonna walk around.

[Matan Evan]

You pull up. Patrick.

[Chris Distefano]

He's gone now.

[Matan Evan]

Can you pull him up? Patrick. Star show.

[Yannis Pappas]

All right. There he is.

[Chris Distefano]

Feel better.

[Yannis Pappas]

She's. Oh, is that. Is Patrick Starr's mom?

[Matan Evan]

The one next to him? Yeah, yeah, that's his sister.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, okay. What's her name?

[Matan Evan]

Patrick.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh. Brother and sister. Patrick versus Patrick. Yeah. Good for you, man.

[Chris Distefano]

Do you. Do you think autistic kids are necessary to compete with artificial intelligence?

[Matan Evan]

I don't understand the question.

[Yannis Pappas]

We're saying that because the only child. They say people who have autism are so smart.

[Matan Evan]

No, they're not.

[Yannis Pappas]

That's what they say.

[Matan Evan]

They're wrong.

[Yannis Pappas]

You don't think that they're smart?

[Matan Evan]

No, they're. They're pretty stupid, actually.

[Chris Distefano]

Do you have it. Do you have experience with autistic kids?

[Matan Evan]

I have some experience. Like, I mean, what level are you talking about or something? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Why would we need them to compete with. We could just shut down the computer.

[Chris Distefano]

That's a good point. Yeah, that's a good point. But they do so much for us, like, help us search for porn and.

[Matan Evan]

No, I'm against that stuff.

[Chris Distefano]

You're against that? But they help us, you know, find the right buildings. Buildings? Yeah, they Search for stuff.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, but I don't. I mean, even if we couldn't shut down the computer, I don't know why we would try to use autistic people. I mean.

[Chris Distefano]

Well, because you made a statement and you said that you believe autism is on the rise because it's humans evolving to be able to be better at computers.

[Matan Evan]

I hope not. No.

[Chris Distefano]

That's what you said, though.

[Matan Evan]

I mean, did he say that?

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

Oh, you know what? Since you're gaslighting now, he's gonna talk for the next two minutes. Here you go.

[Chris Distefano]

Okay.

[Yannis Pappas]

Okay.

[Chris Distefano]

I actually went to a Quaker school for a little while, so I'm okay with a little bit of silence.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

You know, in Quakers, they have a. A silent meetings. They don't talk. There's a quick Lord moves them to talk.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, I don't. I. I feel for him, though. It's tough to have a fever and a sore throat. I don't like the way I feel.

[Chris Distefano]

It's tough.

[Yannis Pappas]

A fever and a sore throat. Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

And imagine walking around all day and you got nobody to talk to. This kid doesn't talk.

[Yannis Pappas]

He doesn't talk. But the other one talks. The skinnier one.

[Chris Distefano]

No, he doesn't talk either.

[Yannis Pappas]

That's right, he doesn't talk.

[Chris Distefano]

And the Hamas kid didn't talk either.

[Yannis Pappas]

The Hamas. Oh. Oh, the Hamas. That's who the other kid was. Remember the Hamas kid on our episode? He had his mask on. He's out there without a mask on.

[Matan Evan]

Oh, no, that's not that guy.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, that's not that guy. Oh, no.

[Chris Distefano]

That other guy legitimately was in Hamas, right?

[Matan Evan]

No, the. The guy you're talking about was just that guy dressed up. He's back in LA now. He had to go sooner.

[Chris Distefano]

Oh.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, okay.

[Matan Evan]

We have to send him back.

[Yannis Pappas]

Do you guys travel all on the same plane?

[Matan Evan]

No, not usually. Well, like, just whatever's cheaper. I mean, usually that's just not the case.

[Yannis Pappas]

What airline do you typically fly?

[Matan Evan]

I'll send them on Spirit.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes. And then what will you take?

[Matan Evan]

Just the. The one. At least in the middle. Just not that one.

[Yannis Pappas]

Right, right.

[Chris Distefano]

So you just. You just go somewhere in the middle. No Delta for you.

[Matan Evan]

I need to check if I'm getting a phone call. What's your password?

[Chris Distefano]

Not going to give it to you.

[Yannis Pappas]

1776. And just close your eyes.

[Matan Evan]

You have any idea what it is?

[Yannis Pappas]

His password? Honestly, if I had to guess his password. Four numbers.

[Chris Distefano]

You're quick. Let's do it again. Let's try again. Let's see if we can get. It's a new game. Put it in the middle and we.

[Matan Evan]

See your hand out closer and up.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh.

[Matan Evan]

Chance.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, I'm sick.

[Matan Evan]

So you have an advantage.

[Chris Distefano]

I can't do it. You're right, you would. It's too quick.

[Yannis Pappas]

You're good.

[Matan Evan]

I'll give you 10 more tries, but then I get the password. If you don't get it.

[Chris Distefano]

No, I can't get it. Ted. I'm just gonna have to lift you up. You upside down.

[Yannis Pappas]

It's good. Damn.

[Matan Evan]

I've been doing this for too long.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, I got it.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, I got it.

[Yannis Pappas]

Damn.

[Chris Distefano]

If you weren't sick, you'd be able to get it. It's just because you're sick.

[Yannis Pappas]

Well, you.

[Chris Distefano]

If you don't feel bad, it's just because you're sick.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, I don't feel bad because it's like 20 to 1.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, it is.

[Yannis Pappas]

You are winning. Oh, you are overall winning. That's a good point. That's a good point.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

So, Patrick. There he is.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

You're not normally a guest on people's podcast, so this feels fun for us because normally you don't. You don't really appear on too many people. We saw you on Bad Friends. That was good.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, that was a while ago.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. Yeah, that was good. Do you like Bobby and Andrew or just one?

[Matan Evan]

No, I like them both. I like Bobby. He's the one who got me on it. I met him trying to sneak into the Comedy Store. But before I tried to sneak in, I. I met him outside. And then it wasn't necessary because he.

[Yannis Pappas]

Just got you in.

[Matan Evan]

No, because then I, like, succeeded with my goal because I was just going there to try to find guests for my show.

[Yannis Pappas]

Because you're not. You don't do standup comedy.

[Matan Evan]

No, I don't. I did it twice going bad. I got kicked out both times, actually.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

What was the reason you got kicked out, you think, well, maybe he's underage.

[Chris Distefano]

You got to be 18. Oh, that's.

[Yannis Pappas]

That's one reason. But what's a. Was there a content related reason?

[Matan Evan]

No, no. Actually, it wasn't the underage. The first time. I made some jokes that they didn't like, and then I sent that skinny guy up there for 10 minutes and then they removed us.

[Chris Distefano]

Right. You put him up there and he just looked with his eyes.

[Matan Evan]

They got uncomfortable. They kicked us out.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

The second time, they didn't like my jokes.

[Chris Distefano]

Right, right, right.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Do you remember any of those jokes that you were doing?

[Matan Evan]

I I might use that footage, so I don't want to spoil them.

[Chris Distefano]

Right, right, right. You want to use that? Yeah. Hold it back.

[Yannis Pappas]

And then maybe if you got own one of these buildings outright. You do a comedy show in your building? Y. Yeah, on the roof.

[Matan Evan]

I'm not a comedian, though. I don't find stuff funny. Just business.

[Chris Distefano]

I noticed that. Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

You're not a big nothing to waste time with. Open dies.

[Chris Distefano]

Yes. Open your eyes and be there. Yeah, I noticed that you're not big into jokes. You don't like when other people try to make jokes. No, no. You're very serious businessman.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

What about after you get all the buildings?

[Chris Distefano]

What do you. What do you think may be the next venture that you get then?

[Matan Evan]

I'll get into that political stuff and human trafficking or. No, no. Like the 40 stuff.

[Chris Distefano]

The 40 stuff.

[Yannis Pappas]

So is there anyone, though, that you do find funny? Even though you find most things not funny? Is there someone who's broken through in you for you? Ah, nice. Yeah, he's big.

[Chris Distefano]

I got a question. When he goes to the 60s or the 40s, do you ever just try to grab on him and go with him, like hold on to him when he time travels? Okay, that's an answer.

[Yannis Pappas]

That's an answer.

[Chris Distefano]

That's an answer.

[Matan Evan]

I didn't want to answer because my voice hurts.

[Yannis Pappas]

That's true, but that's why we really.

[Chris Distefano]

But you used your voice not to answer, so I don't know if I. I believe you. Okay, now you're using it to spit.

[Matan Evan]

That didn't hurt as much.

[Yannis Pappas]

Right, Right. It feels better that way.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. Now, were you diagnosed with anything?

[Matan Evan]

No, I haven't had time to go to the doctor. Just been filming.

[Chris Distefano]

So you're undiagnosed. Functionally undiagnosed with the sickness? Yes.

[Matan Evan]

I mean, no. Yeah. I don't know what it is.

[Chris Distefano]

Right. Do you think you have something?

[Matan Evan]

I. I mean, maybe I have that fake one that made up one.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

AD Yeah, I know what you mean.

[Matan Evan]

Oh, yeah, Covid. Now I'm trying to get you guys demonetized because you wouldn't give me the password. It was fake, Covid.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, well, what do you want? The password. So. But there's no buildings in my phone.

[Matan Evan]

I want to send myself money.

[Chris Distefano]

You want to sell money from my account?

[Yannis Pappas]

How much would you send?

[Matan Evan]

Whatever is left.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, just all of it.

[Chris Distefano]

All of it? Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

I don't know if he has any in there, though.

[Chris Distefano]

We don't know.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, yeah, that. That I. That I don't know.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

Usually I'll just try sending a million.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, go for it.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

Doesn't work yet.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. So you're. You're also a thief. You guys are into thievery.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

And so you. Thievery, begging and building. Buying is big. The businesses.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, buildings.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, buildings. And Patrick, Pat. And you sit around all day. You watch Patrick with your two deaf mute friends.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Which is a fun day.

[Matan Evan]

That's a good day.

[Chris Distefano]

That's a great life.

[Yannis Pappas]

What about exercise? Do you ever exercise?

[Matan Evan]

Nope. No. No exercise? No. Just. What? I mean, maybe just walking is exercise. Running if I have to get somewhere, but not on purpose.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

And what about eating? What? Do you eat healthy or do you.

[Matan Evan]

Just not Whatever I can find. Usually just quick and easy. Like McDonald's?

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes.

[Chris Distefano]

And what do you think about women in the workplace?

[Matan Evan]

I'll take a photo of them.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Okay. Yeah, you take.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. What about.

[Matan Evan]

They're sitting down. I'll slide my phone under the chair.

[Yannis Pappas]

That's nice.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. Record the women's from underneath.

[Yannis Pappas]

I had a friend.

[Chris Distefano]

Is that. Do you think they.

[Matan Evan]

Probably a little far, actually.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

I had a friend who was a cop, and they searched this guy and they found he had video cameras on his shoes that he was running. He had a backpack on, and he ran wires. And he had two video cameras on.

[Chris Distefano]

The tips of his shoes.

[Yannis Pappas]

And he would walk in the summer, he would walk next to a woman and she would have a skirt on, and he would take pictures and videos of underneath her skirt.

[Chris Distefano]

Right.

[Matan Evan]

Sounds like he's projecting.

[Chris Distefano]

Sounds like he's projecting a little bit now. You've become known a little bit on the Internet.

[Yannis Pappas]

Very well known.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. Are you getting lady attention?

[Matan Evan]

No, I don't spend time with that. Just I'm not, like, using those photos for, like, my. Like, I don't.

[Chris Distefano]

You just give them to them?

[Matan Evan]

No, I'm selling them.

[Chris Distefano]

Oh, selling.

[Yannis Pappas]

Selling.

[Chris Distefano]

Now that's part of the business.

[Matan Evan]

I'm against, like, watching porn and stuff like that.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, you sell them and you make money on the photos you have of the girls.

[Chris Distefano]

Right.

[Matan Evan]

Or I'll use it as leverage against them.

[Yannis Pappas]

Right. And then what do you want from them? Like, you say I have a photo of you building. Yes.

[Chris Distefano]

You're in the buildings. Huge.

[Yannis Pappas]

That's a good thing to be into.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. When does the first. Take me back to your passion for buildings? The first time you saw a building, you fell in love with it. What happened? You just looked at the building and you said to him, or you want him to answer that question?

[Matan Evan]

I'LL let him take it from here.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, you pick it up from here. Viral flooring. So a sigh happened. There was a big sigh. I'm trying to see if I can speak. Viral flooring. Movement means you loved it. Inching towards you says that you looked at viral flooring. You said buildings is what we're getting into. Did I do that right? Am I speaking viral flooring?

[Matan Evan]

What happened?

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, look, he's taking it out of focus. No. You think I'm back.

[Chris Distefano]

These are fun kids. No, I like this kid different. He's a fun kid, I think. I don't even know if he's a kid. Nobody knows and nobody knows where he's from. He's a mysterious kid. He might have just come up from the planet. Who knows? He's from a country that I like.

[Yannis Pappas]

No, it's like he's a breath of fresh air. Somebody different. Something different.

[Chris Distefano]

He's doing something different.

[Yannis Pappas]

What about when people say they compare you to Eric Andre? Does that make you happy? Sad.

[Chris Distefano]

Andy, cough.

[Yannis Pappas]

Not believing it. Like, how do you feel about it?

[Matan Evan]

No, they're comedians. So I'm like business guy.

[Chris Distefano]

You're more business about things. Yeah, yeah. You don't like those guys. What happened?

[Yannis Pappas]

Sick. He's sick.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. Did you have a flashback?

[Matan Evan]

I'm trying to get out of the angle.

[Chris Distefano]

Oh, you want to get out of the angle, right? Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

I wonder. Do you ever wonder, like, because we don't have any, like, video of like a Nikolai Tesla or some of these people. They might have been a lot of people in history like him. We just have video of him.

[Matan Evan]

We can send it back to the 80s.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

I don't think he's going to be inventing anything monumental for managing.

[Yannis Pappas]

I don't know. He can. I believe in him. He's. He can. He's smart enough.

[Chris Distefano]

You think so?

[Yannis Pappas]

Focus. But I don't think he's going to let you.

[Chris Distefano]

He's not going to let you.

[Yannis Pappas]

He's not going to let you do it again.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, he'll just. To the end. He also. He's okay with Lebanese, so.

[Yannis Pappas]

But not your neighbor, though.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

He said not okay with your neighbors.

[Matan Evan]

You fix it.

[Chris Distefano]

Well, he's not big with the neighbors either.

[Yannis Pappas]

He's not.

[Chris Distefano]

He's not big with the neighbors. I like.

[Yannis Pappas]

Pat's got a nice haircut today.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, he's got a nice. Yeah, thanks for the Christine. Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

I've been growing my hair and I want my. I want mine to look like Matan. Yeah, I think I like Matan's. Hair a lot, but mine doesn't have the consistency that he has.

[Chris Distefano]

Does he look a little like Jack Black? Yeah, a little bit like Jack Black. Do you get that a lot?

[Yannis Pappas]

Jack Black?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

What do you mean?

[Chris Distefano]

From the white stripes.

[Yannis Pappas]

Jack White.

[Chris Distefano]

Right, Jack White.

[Yannis Pappas]

Jack White.

[Chris Distefano]

Sorry, yeah. Are your eyes overstimulated? Relax and protect them with Essilor eyesen lenses. Switch to Essilor eyes and lenses and.

[Matan Evan]

Find your local essilor [e-mail].

[Chris Distefano]

This episode.

[Matan Evan]

Is brought to you by Amazon. Amazon has everything for every party.

[Yannis Pappas]

Say your daughter wants a birthday party.

[Matan Evan]

But she doesn't just want any party party. She wants a tea party.

[Yannis Pappas]

No, scratch that.

[Matan Evan]

A princess tea party.

[Yannis Pappas]

Wait, a princess T. Rex party.

[Matan Evan]

Whatever that means. From tea sets to tiaras to apparently.

[Yannis Pappas]

Toddler sized T. Rex costumes.

[Matan Evan]

Shop everything for every party on Amazon.

[Chris Distefano]

They're just. This is just gonna be a thing.

[Yannis Pappas]

He's just gonna keep doing it.

[Chris Distefano]

It's gonna keep doing it.

[Yannis Pappas]

There's nothing we could do.

[Chris Distefano]

Viral flooring. Is there a way to stop him from doing that?

[Yannis Pappas]

He's just going to keep. He wants to do it.

[Chris Distefano]

When viral flooring doesn't obey, he breaks his hand.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, he broke his hand.

[Matan Evan]

He does not have nothing to do with.

[Chris Distefano]

And he's got a. He's made him sign a legal agreement that he can't talk so he could never get him in trouble for it. Which is a great manager to have. You can just beat on your manager.

[Matan Evan]

No, he's the opposite way.

[Chris Distefano]

He beats on you. But you kicked him before. I just put it out of focus again.

[Yannis Pappas]

He's just gonna keep doing it.

[Chris Distefano]

Keep doing. Just do it with the. Just leave us unfocused.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, just.

[Chris Distefano]

It's just fine.

[Yannis Pappas]

She's gonna be.

[Chris Distefano]

I mean, imagine being a parent in today's world.

[Yannis Pappas]

This is what it is.

[Chris Distefano]

This is what it is.

[Yannis Pappas]

This is like a normal child in today's world.

[Chris Distefano]

I think this is a normal kid in.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, this is a kid with zero problems in today's world.

[Chris Distefano]

This is just what it is. Yeah, they do. I mean, I mean, imagine you just. You can't focus on anything. You're scrolling. Doom scroll. His life is a doom scroll.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, but he's very, very, very, very, very smart. He really.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, yeah, he's a smart.

[Yannis Pappas]

You can't be like this without being very, very, very smart.

[Chris Distefano]

Like what?

[Yannis Pappas]

Like the, you know what he's doing. Like having buildings and knowing about the 40s and all.

[Chris Distefano]

Right, right.

[Yannis Pappas]

Having someone who comes from the 80s.

[Chris Distefano]

That's right. You can't. Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes, exactly. Selling pictures of people online. He knows what he's doing.

[Chris Distefano]

Now you have an injury on your knuckle.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, man. What happened?

[Chris Distefano]

Did you. Did you punch? Did you punch? Viral flooring.

[Matan Evan]

Again, not allowed to say.

[Chris Distefano]

You can't say.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, man.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. Whose side were you on? Johnny Depp or Amber Heard?

[Matan Evan]

I don't really know about it, but I know which one is the male. So that guy.

[Chris Distefano]

You.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

You're for him or against him?

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, he's. You agree with me?

[Yannis Pappas]

Well, no. For the male, yes. For men.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah. Here we go again. I try to pull it.

[Yannis Pappas]

Come on.

[Chris Distefano]

You want to play the pool fight again?

[Yannis Pappas]

No, because last time we played the pull fight, I pulled him over the table.

[Chris Distefano]

I know, but that's because you're a much bigger human being than he is.

[Yannis Pappas]

I know.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

You don't shake hands.

[Yannis Pappas]

You're gay.

[Matan Evan]

Poo.

[Chris Distefano]

Here we go again. Get in there. Viral flooring. Viral flooring has just been playing with change and this. Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

What is that?

[Yannis Pappas]

You pulled it off. No, we saw it. Well, we have. We have it out of focus, but we saw it. Yeah, man.

[Matan Evan]

I won't mess with it anymore.

[Yannis Pappas]

I don't want to. I'm. I really am. Are you gonna rest today? Can you rest a little bit?

[Matan Evan]

No, I have to go do stuff. Making money. Money.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, money, money, money.

[Chris Distefano]

When do you expect that you'll get into local politics and try to make a run to help out your friends who are on online from the 40s? Oh, he got. He had a headache.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Do you think that Corinne. Our friend Corinne Fisher is running for mayor of New York? Do you. What do you think she has to do?

[Matan Evan]

I. I like the black guy. Is he still Mayor Eric Adams?

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. Yeah. He's out, and they say he's gonna. Now he's running as an independent. He's.

[Matan Evan]

Because he's starting to become smart.

[Chris Distefano]

Yes, starting. That's the key.

[Yannis Pappas]

What do you think's becoming smart about him, like, now? What, is he changing?

[Matan Evan]

He's becoming more conservative and less black.

[Chris Distefano]

Right, right, right, right, right. That's a good. That's the thing. Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Okay.

[Chris Distefano]

That's nice.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah. All right.

[Matan Evan]

I met him last time I was here.

[Yannis Pappas]

You met him? How'd you meet him?

[Matan Evan]

He was at the studio I was shooting at. He filmed an episode with somebody else, and he didn't. He seemed like he was grifting a little bit. He seems like deep down, he's a little bit smart, actually.

[Yannis Pappas]

Right, right, right. Yeah. Yeah, right. Who's your favorite politician of all time, besides the guy from the 40s?

[Matan Evan]

Michael Jackson.

[Chris Distefano]

Nice, nice.

[Yannis Pappas]

You like him, Jay?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Mj, he was good.

[Chris Distefano]

Not sure if he was in politics.

[Yannis Pappas]

Well, I mean, to him he was.

[Matan Evan]

So he said that Republican or Democrat, doesn't moderate still sell shoes?

[Yannis Pappas]

Right. Michael Jordan, right?

[Chris Distefano]

Michael Jackson.

[Yannis Pappas]

Mj. Yes, right. He did. It's true. That's. And he did make that statement, Right?

[Chris Distefano]

And that's how you feel about. That's closest to your politics?

[Matan Evan]

Oh, no, no.

[Chris Distefano]

Your politics is just against the guys who are next door to Lebanese.

[Matan Evan]

That's like the number one rule. Yeah, but number two is like, just conservative.

[Chris Distefano]

Just conservative.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

Conservative values.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, conservative values. Good.

[Chris Distefano]

Conservative family value.

[Yannis Pappas]

No abortions. None of that.

[Chris Distefano]

No, no. Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

Oh, no, no, no.

[Chris Distefano]

This is pro business.

[Yannis Pappas]

So what happens if you get a woman pregnant and you don't want to have the baby? What would you do?

[Matan Evan]

I'm not the father.

[Yannis Pappas]

You're not the father?

[Chris Distefano]

You're not the father.

[Yannis Pappas]

You would just deny it.

[Matan Evan]

I'm not.

[Yannis Pappas]

Okay.

[Chris Distefano]

How do you consume your news? Which channel do you watch?

[Matan Evan]

Huh?

[Chris Distefano]

Which news channel do you like?

[Matan Evan]

Oh.

[Chris Distefano]

Oh, yeah, that one.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

If you had a son. You know what? You name it.

[Matan Evan]

Patrick J. Oh, I guess we're on to. Patrick is better, actually, right?

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, you like that name?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, yeah, it's a good name.

[Yannis Pappas]

Does he have a wife? Does Flooring have a wife?

[Chris Distefano]

Is there a Mrs. Flooring? Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Where'd you guys meet? Home Depot?

[Yannis Pappas]

Home Deep. Oh, all sugar, man. But it's okay. Yeah, Maybe it'll make you feel better. The sugar, it helps?

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, it helps because it's like numbing my throat because it's so cold.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yes, but. And the sugar, you don't mind if it's going to make it worse.

[Chris Distefano]

Thank you.

[Yannis Pappas]

Advil, I think.

[Matan Evan]

Can you eat it, please?

[Chris Distefano]

Advil.

[Yannis Pappas]

It's Advil.

[Matan Evan]

Can you eat it?

[Yannis Pappas]

No, because I. Advil hurts my stomach.

[Matan Evan]

No, you'll be okay. Can you eat it?

[Chris Distefano]

I can't. I actually can't.

[Matan Evan]

Why not?

[Chris Distefano]

It's. I just. Against my principles. I don't do Advil.

[Matan Evan]

Why not?

[Chris Distefano]

I just don't like the pharmaceutical industry. It's my politics.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, can I see if I can get in the Big Gulp? Let's see if I can get in.

[Chris Distefano]

Let me see if I can get in the Big up. Oh, one more shot. One more shot.

[Matan Evan]

Let me see if I can get it.

[Chris Distefano]

At some point with him, you just start throwing things at each other.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, well, that's Good, though.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

All right. So today. So today, not feeling good. But we got buildings, we got McDonald's. What about sports? Do you care anything at all about any sport?

[Matan Evan]

I use. I used to like basketball. I still like it, but not as much.

[Chris Distefano]

Do you care that we haven't been recording this at all?

[Matan Evan]

That doesn't matter to me because now I know because you guys came on mine first. Like I. I did the. The old favor of coming to yours. So if he's not filming, that's your problem, right?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Well, we were happy to come on yours. I remember your.

[Chris Distefano]

I wanted to talk to you without the cameras on you guys.

[Yannis Pappas]

You. You made you your manager or guy who runs your ads. We know him well. He. Yes. He wanted us to do back to back the day, but I said no, I want to have like full energy with you. Yes. I like that because I want it to be about quality, not quantity like the ads you are.

[Matan Evan]

You guys will take whatever I mean, which is fine. I'll do the same. But I keep losing mine.

[Yannis Pappas]

Do you feel like you need a lot of money to live?

[Chris Distefano]

Something's going on between them.

[Yannis Pappas]

He was breathing a little hard.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

So I think he's might get hit now.

[Chris Distefano]

We should just fucking send them to China to negotiate the tariffs.

[Yannis Pappas]

That's. I. We would get a lot more done.

[Matan Evan]

I think you guys support the tariffs.

[Chris Distefano]

No, we should send you guys. Do we support the tariffs? Oh, I don't know enough about it. Yeah, I don't know enough.

[Matan Evan]

You support them.

[Chris Distefano]

I don't know enough about it. I don't.

[Matan Evan]

So why do you keep mentioning it? You just want to. You want to.

[Yannis Pappas]

We did a whole episode on it.

[Chris Distefano]

No, I think we should send you guys to China to just deal with it.

[Matan Evan]

That's still not an answer. You're fence sitting.

[Chris Distefano]

I'm a fence sitter. No, I'm for some tariffs and against other tariffs.

[Matan Evan]

Steel fence sitting. You're not even giving it now. You're just really. Now you're putting your arms to each side of the lawn, right?

[Chris Distefano]

I guess so. Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

You're for the tariffs.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, I'm killing the Chinese.

[Chris Distefano]

That's a solution. There's a lot of them, though. There's a billion of them.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, but most of them, I mean, maybe in like Beijing. Yeah, there. Some of them are a little bit smarter.

[Chris Distefano]

Right.

[Matan Evan]

But most, A lot of them live on like the outskirts in the mountains. Those guys are like animals, Right, Right.

[Chris Distefano]

And how about the ones who live in the outskirts in America?

[Matan Evan]

Less like animals. But what Are you talking about.

[Chris Distefano]

I'm talking about what do you feel about them?

[Matan Evan]

But where are there a lot of people living in the outskirts here?

[Yannis Pappas]

Okay. In Washington.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, but there's no, like, living on a mountain in China where there's, like, no. No water.

[Yannis Pappas]

You're looking, oh, some places, but you're right. Definitely more in China right here.

[Chris Distefano]

Right.

[Yannis Pappas]

Do you. What about a Chinese American? Do you have a problem with them?

[Matan Evan]

Don't exist.

[Yannis Pappas]

Right. You're America. You.

[Matan Evan]

I get my politics from the 80s, right. Actually the 60s maybe before.

[Yannis Pappas]

Well, right.

[Chris Distefano]

Two different eras. I mean, the 80s, 60s.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Conservative Reagan.

[Matan Evan]

80S. Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

If it's conservative, you're in.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't love that free love shit.

[Matan Evan]

What?

[Chris Distefano]

I'm sorry to curse in front of a minor. I apologize.

[Matan Evan]

Patrick.

[Yannis Pappas]

Do you. Was your mom and dad conservative?

[Matan Evan]

Patrick and Mr. Krabs. Oh, your mom doesn't work there, but Mr. Krabs owns the restaurant.

[Yannis Pappas]

Okay, that's good. That's good information.

[Matan Evan]

And then Patrick sister is filming the TV show on the spin off.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, yeah.

[Matan Evan]

On the TV show. On the TV show.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, wow. So it's actually pretty smart.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah. The TV show is him having a TV show. Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah, I like that.

[Matan Evan]

I came up with it.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, okay.

[Chris Distefano]

You wrote this for Patrick.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, Patrick.

[Yannis Pappas]

And it's only one first name. Maton. No last name.

[Matan Evan]

I have a last name.

[Yannis Pappas]

But you don't like to say it.

[Matan Evan]

I mean, it's on my. My stuff, people. It's not like a hidden thing.

[Yannis Pappas]

What's your last name?

[Matan Evan]

Evan.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, Matan Evan.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah. E V, E, N, Even. Yes.

[Chris Distefano]

Evan.

[Matan Evan]

Evan.

[Chris Distefano]

Did you pronounce it Evan?

[Matan Evan]

Yeah, he spelled even.

[Chris Distefano]

Ah, got it.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, okay. I thought. I thought it was just Matan. Yeah, yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Spelled that way. It's got to be. It's tough to figure out, Neil, where his accent's from.

[Yannis Pappas]

Do you think you'll ever change or you'll always be this way and you want to be this way?

[Matan Evan]

I'm sure I'll be ashamed of the way I behaved at this age sooner or later.

[Yannis Pappas]

Right? And then you'll just deal with it then.

[Matan Evan]

I'm already unable to watch stuff from, like, a year or two ago, so I'm sure it's gonna just get worse and worse.

[Yannis Pappas]

Right. And two years ago, you were also 17 or you were 15.

[Matan Evan]

Two years ago I was 15.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Right.

[Matan Evan]

People think I'm. That's like maybe the one thing I'm not lying about. That I'm 17.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

I'm gonna be 18 this month. I don't know when you're releasing it.

[Yannis Pappas]

When's your birthday?

[Chris Distefano]

Your birthday?

[Matan Evan]

Yeah. My birthday?

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What are you gonna do? You gonna give him birthday punches on his birthday? Choke him. You're gonna choke?

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Out of him? Yeah. He says he's gonna choke the shit out of you.

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, nice.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah, he's got a piece of tape on there.

[Yannis Pappas]

I think you should do stand up. Try it.

[Matan Evan]

He's a fat piece of this guy.

[Yannis Pappas]

He is a little bit.

[Chris Distefano]

Oh, here we go.

[Matan Evan]

Down the fight.

[Chris Distefano]

These two really have a love hate relationship. Here it starts. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There it started. Yeah. Did he bite him? He's spitting his ear. He's spitting his ear.

[Yannis Pappas]

Probably.

[Chris Distefano]

He's spitting his ear. Oh, that's gross.

[Matan Evan]

Why would you do that?

[Chris Distefano]

Why would you do that? I think he got angry at you for something. Are you okay? He's still going for that. This guy's really focused.

[Yannis Pappas]

He has good hair, too.

[Chris Distefano]

This kid's got good hair. Here we go. You getting this on camera? We don't know.

[Yannis Pappas]

No, too far away. Wait, but why don't you want us in focus, Matan?

[Chris Distefano]

He just likes having fun.

[Matan Evan]

I don't know how to tie my shoes.

[Yannis Pappas]

All right.

[Chris Distefano]

You're fun. I bet you comedians really like him.

[Yannis Pappas]

Of course, people like people. Gets massive views.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Very good views.

[Matan Evan]

Patrick. Oh, Patrick.

[Yannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

Damn, he's. Oh, snap.

[Chris Distefano]

Why is everything always come to physical confrontation?

[Yannis Pappas]

Oh, here we go. Yeah. All right. Well, that's the show, folks. Yeah, I think so.

[Chris Distefano]

Good having you.

[Yannis Pappas]

Well, it was nice to have Jesse on.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Matan Evan]

Thanks for having me. I appreciate it.

[Chris Distefano]

Yeah.

[Yannis Pappas]

All right. Thank you, bro. Feel better.

[Chris Distefano]

I knew it was happening.

[Yannis Pappas]

All right.

[Chris Distefano]

It's good to see you guys. That's good.

[Yannis Pappas]

Feel better.

[Matan Evan]

Yeah. If I wasn't sick, I would have got you there.

[Yannis Pappas]

You would have. You would have. I.

[Chris Distefano]

You guys take care.

[Yannis Pappas]

Later, boys.

[Chris Distefano]

Go look at buildings. Yeah, that's it.

[Matan Evan]

Okay. Nice.

[Chris Distefano]

Nice to see you.

[Matan Evan]

Nice seeing you guys.

[Yannis Pappas]

Feel better, bro.

[Chris Distefano]

Take care. Thank you.

[Yannis Pappas]

Later, Mr. Flooring.

[Chris Distefano]

Flooring. Good seeing you.

[Matan Evan]

Nice meeting you guys.

[Chris Distefano]

Pleasure.

[Matan Evan]

Have a good one.

[Yannis Pappas]

You too.