Clocking with Joey Camasta | History Hyenas

Summary

History Hyenas Podcast Episode Summary

Episode: "Clocking with Joey Camasta"

Hosts: Chris Distefano & Yannis Pappas
Guest: Joey Camasta
Release Date: April 2, 2026

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Episode Overview

In today’s episode, Chris and Yannis welcome back friend, comedian, and influencer extraordinaire, Joey Camasta. The episode is a high-energy, hilarious reunion mixing personal updates, raunchy banter, pop culture commentary, and inside peeks at gay culture and influencer life. Across stories of peptide-stacked diets, boyfriends with “fat asses”, and celebrity transitions, the crew riffs on fashion, body image, relationships, and more—always veering toward the wild, unfiltered, and deeply funny.

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Key Topics & Segments

1. Reunion & Paris Adventures

• [01:39–02:20] Chris and Yannis catch up with Joey after five years, riffing on his time in Paris and how it “changed” him.
  • Joey: “I went to Paris and it changed me. I sucked a baguette up there...”
• Joey playfully compares the directness of Parisians to “American black women”—both tell it like it is.

2. Algorithms, Social Media & Reconnections

• [02:22–03:26] Chris explains how shifting social media algorithms unexpectedly reintroduced Joey’s content into his life.
  • Chris: “My algorithm changed. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, I started getting all your content. I immediately said to myself, you, this is happening fast.”
  • Joey: “I started dilating when I got the text message.”
• Discussion of how friendship can drift and reconnect due to digital life.

3. Coffee Reviews & The Influencer Grind

• [03:27–04:01] Joey’s famed coffee reviews and influencer scams:
  • Chris: “We went to Cafe Arcane Bar because of your coffee reviews. The line was out the door.”
  • Joey: “I don’t do the pizza reviews... I’m skinny, so I have to just drink coffee.”

4. Weight Loss, Peptides & Body Image

• [04:01–04:43] Joey details his weight-loss journey involving GLP1s and being sponsored by Weight Watchers:
  • Joey: “I’m on a lethal dose of GLP1s... I take Zepbound.”
  • Humorous riff on the culture of peptides, stacking drugs, and aspirations for the “strong one” he can’t have.
• Joey shares how influencer followers can’t accept him being “hot” after weight loss.

5. Food, Instagram, & Cooking Aspirations

• [05:06–05:43] Discussion about Joey’s next moves: expanding into food content and cooking shows.
  • Joey: “I’m going to start filming some stuff at the house. Come on over, have a little chat and chew.”

6. Body Mods: Hair, Lips, Fillers

• [11:06–13:23] Joey’s journey with aesthetics:
  • Joey: “I went to Dr. Turchell in New Jersey for a hair transplant last year. My boyfriend paid for it.”
  • On lips: “Those are also plumped... did some experimental fillers, had a black eye, but it’s smoothed out now.”

7. Relationships & Gay Culture

• [08:18–10:19] Joey is in a four-year relationship with a younger, athletic boyfriend.
  • Joey: “He played football in college... In the gay community you can have a young boyfriend—everyone’s like, girl, go.”
  • Conversation on monogamy and dating norms in the gay world.

8. ‘Clocking’ and Queer Lingo

• [34:52–35:51]
  • Joey educates on the meanings of “clocking” (“you can tell someone is trans just by looking”) and “spooked” (“they didn’t know you were trans and they found out”).
  • Joey: “Clockable means you can tell that they're trans. Spooked is more like... you hook up and then they find out.”

9. Celebrity Gossip & Pop Culture

• [14:01–16:01]
  • Discussion on Ariana Grande’s changing looks and the phases of her public persona.
• [32:41–36:02]
  • Riff on the prevalence of trans kids among Hollywood celebrities, including perspectives on why that’s trending in showbiz families.
  • Joey: “Celebrities’ kids aren’t used to being told no... you're just a dyke.”

10. Joey’s Influencer Tips, Wins, and Struggles

• [10:56–12:02]
  • How Joey scams “free shit”, e.g., scoring a $9,000 Vivrel bag.
  • Joey: “I just stunt on these hoes downtown with my fashion videos... lose thousands of followers every time I post.”
• Style & Fashion: Baggy clothes are back, 501s recommended.
  • Joey: “Everything old is new again. The 90s are very in.”

11. TV, Film & Drag Race

• [16:01–17:08] Joey and the guys talk about current TV, dystopian shows, ‘Drag Race’, and the authenticity of content.
  • Chris: “Are you watching Drag Race?”
  • Joey: “Jane Don went home this week.”

12. Personal Philosophy: Kindness, Acceptance, & Having Fun

• [25:06–25:19]
  • Joey (on his approach to life): “Lead your life with good intentions and kindness in your heart... Just choose kindness.”
  • Chris: “Didn’t we say that last week?”

13. The Physical, Mental & Social Health Matrix

• [28:25–29:47] Joey and Chris get into peptides, weight loss, and body image issues.
  • Joey: “The disease in me is... binge eating, that’s my drug.”
  • Honest talk about body dysmorphia, intermittent fasting, social expectations.

14. Naughtier & Raunchier Moments

• [06:29–07:12] Chris shares about learning to douche from Mateo Lane, with Joey giving bottoming tips, graphic honesty about sex, and why Joey “never painted” anyone.

15. Comedy, Mentorship, & Drag Mothers

• [48:35–49:33]
  • Joey: “In drag, every queen has a drag mother. Do they have that in comedy? I think I’d need a comedy mother to do stand-up.”
  • Chris: “I’d be your comedy mother!”

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Paris’ influence:
  • Joey: “Paris men are like American black women. They’ll just tell you how it is.” [02:15]
• On social media’s impact:
  • Chris: “We live in a world of algorithms... the algorithm shifted us out of each other’s worlds.” [03:07]
• On body positivity and backlash:
  • Joey: “They always tell me to be a fat, funny person. They can’t take that I’m so hot now.” [12:08]
• On fashion advice:
  • Joey: “You wanna get a 501 Levi’s. Not too much on the ass and thighs. You want it fitted, but then straight-legged.” [17:24]
• Joey on relationship openness:
  • Joey: “I'm the first man he's ever been with... It’s so seamless, drama-free.” [19:09]
• On clocking and “spooked”:
  • Joey: “‘Clockable’ means you can tell... ‘Spooked’ is more like they didn’t know you were trans, found out later.” [35:01]
• On influencer reality:
  • Joey: “My jawline’s AI’d there because I look like a turkey neck. I need a facelift.” [39:30]
• Kindness as philosophy:
  • Joey: “Lead your life with good intentions and kindness in your heart.” [25:10]

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Fun Sections & Audience Participation

Patreon Member Name Game

• [56:50–68:32]
  • Hosts read through new Patreon names, riffing on the funniest.
  • Memorable: “WWE men and women's tag team champ, the Hardley Boys,” “P. Diddy's Costco account,” “The next Ayatollah here for a good time, not a long time.”
  • The winning name: "P. Diddy's Costco account." [69:30]

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Final Notes

• Joey invites Chris and Yannis to his new home-based cooking show.
• The episode is a classic blend of irreverence, genuine friendship, insider talk on navigating both gay and straight scenes, and relentless (shameless) humor.
• The tone is unfiltered, playful, and honest, with all participating in cutting up and sharing real vulnerabilities—whether it’s about body image, coming out, or influencer fads.

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For Those Curious...

• Joey Camasta on Instagram: Expect fashion, lavish cooking vids, and fearless hot takes.
• History Hyenas Patreon: Listeners can join for uncensored content and more mayhem.
• Major vibe: Be loud, be kind, be unabashedly yourself.

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Highlighted Timestamps

| Time | Topic / Quote | |-----------|---------------------------------------| | 01:57 | Joey on Paris: “It changed me…” | | 02:46 | Chris on social media & prep | | 04:04 | Joey on GLP1s, Zepbound | | 08:25 | Joey reveals four-year relationship | | 12:08 | Joey on losing followers post-weight | | 17:24 | Joey’s 501 Levi’s fashion advice | | 19:09 | Relationship monogamy chat | | 34:52 | “Clockable”/“spooked” trans lingo | | 39:30 | AI jawline confessions | | 48:35 | Comedy “drag mothers” | | 56:50+ | Patreon name game |

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Summary prepared for listeners who want to catch all the best bits, feel the rapid-fire energy, and revisit the standout moments. “Clocking with Joey Camasta” is History Hyenas at its most unhinged, insightful, and wildly entertaining.

Transcript

[Chris]

So good, so good, so good. New spring arrivals are at Nordstrom Rack stores. Now get ready to save big with up to 60% off rag and bone,

[Joey Kamasta]

Marc Jacobs, free people and more.

[Chris]

How did I not know Rack has Adidas? Cause there's always something new. Join the Nordy Club to unlock exclusive discounts.

[Joey Kamasta]

Shop new arrivals first and more.

[Chris]

Plus, buy online and pick up at your favorite Rack store for free. Great brands, great prices.

[Joey Kamasta]

That's why you wreck.

[Chris]

You're going to love this episode. We got our good friend Joey Kamasta who makes us look straight. We haven't seen this kid in five years, and he's just. His face. He has a woman's face.

[Chrissy]

He is someone who could have transitioned, wanted to transition, but didn't transition.

[Chris]

He's just gay. Yeah.

[Chrissy]

If you want to say, see, me and Chrissy look like men, watch this episode. This one's for the ladies and the fans.

[Chris]

For the ladies and the fans. And go to patreon.com history hyenas after this because the episode we have on Patreon may be our best one yet. We went nuts.

[Chrissy]

We went nuts. Catch me on the road in Boston, West Nyak, New York and Emmaus, Pennsylvania. Tickets at Giannis Pappas comedy dot com. Enjoy this episode.

[Chris]

Speaking of nuts, Joey's are about to be in your mouth. Ye.

[Chrissy]

What's up, everybody? No need to prolong this. We're here with the great Joey Commasta. We've been wanting him back for a

[Chris]

while and he's back.

[Chrissy]

And he's from France.

[Chris]

Yes, Joey, that's what. So we haven't seen you in, Jesus, five years and now you. You're from France now?

[Chrissy]

Yeah, Paris.

[Joey Kamasta]

I went to Paris and it changed me.

[Chris]

Yeah, right.

[Joey Kamasta]

I suck a baguette up there and then next thing you know.

[Chrissy]

Does Paris change a person the way they say? Is it the romantic city it is or.

[Joey Kamasta]

I don't care about the romance. I just like that it's, you know, just kind of highbrow and like, you know, there's. There's no. They don't fool around there. They do now. There's. There's no nonsense there. If they don't like you, they tell you right to your face.

[Chris]

I like that, too. They're like. They're like, Paris men are like American black women.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

They'll just tell you how it is. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

How a T I is Tis.

[Chris]

Tis. Yeah. Now let me tell you something. What happens is we live in a world of algorithms. We live in a world of shelters. You don't know, like the whole world all living on low bubbles. And what miraculous thing happened to me about three weeks ago whenever I texted you? Three, four weeks ago, miraculous thing happened to me. My algorithm changed.

[Joey Kamasta]

I saw. I started dilating when I got the text message. Immediately, I was so excited.

[Chris]

My algorithm changed. And all of a sudden, out of nowhere, I started getting all your content. And you came back into my life. You came back into my life. And I immediately said to myself, you, this is happening fast. I trust him. But just to stay safe, I'm gonna start taking prep because Joey's, you know, in my life right now. And I wanna have fun, unprotected fun with Joey.

[Joey Kamasta]

Right, Exactly.

[Chris]

And so I texted you. And then I realized that we hadn't even spoken in two years because the algorithm shifted us out of each other's worlds.

[Joey Kamasta]

You were on gay black Twitter.

[Chris]

Yes. I became. I was going the Andrew Schultz route. So I said. And I said, joey is now back in my life. And now every day I wake up to a Gasolina Coffee.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Even some of the stuff that he does. I was going to go to rhythm. Rhythm zero because you gave it nine out of five gasolinas and the fucking line was out the door. And I said, I can't go. I would have.

[Joey Kamasta]

Every time the review, they can't keep it on the shelf.

[Chris]

So that your. Your, your coffee reviews, I literally. That's the only ones. Because the part pizza reviews. I mean, I get it, it's such a portentary whatever. But these things, I literally. We went to Cafe Arcane Bar.

[Joey Kamasta]

Remember the one that we been there.

[Chris]

We were going to try to go, but off your review, I said not going now.

[Joey Kamasta]

It was like radioactive battery acid.

[Chris]

Right?

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. I don't do the pizza reviews. I can't. That I'm skinny, so I have to just drink coffee.

[Chrissy]

You do look very skinny.

[Chris]

Can you tell us what's going on?

[Joey Kamasta]

Well, I'm just on a lethal dose of GLP1s.

[Chris]

Why we were talking about peptides. We've been talking about peptides.

[Joey Kamasta]

I didn't know what a peptide was.

[Chris]

Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

Peptide lip gloss, peptide injections.

[Chris]

Peptide copper, one for the skin.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, I didn't know what it was. I still don't know what it is, but I apparently I've been taking them for years. It's the GLP1 is a peptide.

[Chris]

So what do you do? The Ozempic.

[Joey Kamasta]

I know that's for amateurs. I take Zepbound.

[Chris]

Zepbound? That's trisypatide.

[Joey Kamasta]

Trisypatite that's the one.

[Chris]

Like, that's a GLP2. Oh, is it part of the GLP too? So you get the weights of. You get the insulin sensitivity and the appetite control. And then they have read a true type, which is the GLP I'm trying to get. Really. You want the rat out?

[Joey Kamasta]

I want to do stacking. I want to start stacking.

[Chris]

Stacking them up. But you look fantastic. Like, what else do you want to do?

[Joey Kamasta]

I just. I just know there's. I know there's a strong one out there. I know there's a drug that I can't have. I want it.

[Chris]

So does Baby Girl not eat at all anymore?

[Joey Kamasta]

No, I eat, but I do. I have. I'm sponsored by Weight Watchers right now, so I do Weight Watchers.

[Chris]

Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Wow. Because the food. Do you ever come.

[Chrissy]

You have to feel around.

[Joey Kamasta]

It's better than ever.

[Chris]

Yeah. Because. Because. Yep. Jenny Craig is. I think.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. Me and Oprah.

[Chrissy]

Yes.

[Joey Kamasta]

Holding it down. Lizzo.

[Chris]

Do you. Lizzo's got to be on Go.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. They only hire overweight black women. That's why they brought me in another demo.

[Chris]

Because the way he cooks. Have you ever like, Joey needs to cook a meal?

[Joey Kamasta]

I want.

[Chris]

I've been saying this. I want to your house.

[Joey Kamasta]

I'm going to start doing. I'm going to start filming some stuff at the house. Come on over, have a little chat and chew.

[Chris]

Right, Right. So. Because Bert had that thing. Something's burning. Which people he would.

[Joey Kamasta]

But you do on that.

[Chris]

Yeah, something's burned.

[Joey Kamasta]

You doze off.

[Chris]

I don't think our urine.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, it was a good show, but I did doze off. He's funny as hell, but just wasn't the right fit, I don't think.

[Chris]

And he needs to get on a GLP1.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. Did you ever see his dick print?

[Chris]

No. Pull it up, Jesse.

[Joey Kamasta]

It's in the light blue Speedo.

[Chris]

Yes. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

He's got a hog on him.

[Chrissy]

No, I don't think he does.

[Joey Kamasta]

He does.

[Chris]

Bert, maybe. Kreischer dick print. Light blue spit. And Joey knew it immediately. He said, the light blue.

[Joey Kamasta]

I can pull it up.

[Chrissy]

Who's really got some good dick prints that you've been checking? Like, have you seen some good ones or is he up there?

[Joey Kamasta]

Yes. No, that's not it.

[Chris]

No. Does he have a nice penis?

[Joey Kamasta]

Yes. It's curves up. Whoa.

[Chris]

That's what we want, right? A curved up peep.

[Joey Kamasta]

I like it because it hits all the right spots.

[Chris]

Sure. Right now.

[Chrissy]

Yep.

[Joey Kamasta]

Joey, light blue Speedo. There it is.

[Chris]

There it is.

[Joey Kamasta]

No, no, no, no.

[Chris]

You just found it.

[Joey Kamasta]

There it is, right there. Oh, and if you can. And the light blue right there.

[Chris]

Wow.

[Joey Kamasta]

His whole. The whole thing.

[Chris]

And he's got abs. He looks great, actually, so he must be on a.

[Joey Kamasta]

He on.

[Chris]

That's fake. You think those are fake, those abs? Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

You wouldn't take a hit of poppers and swallow that thing?

[Chrissy]

No.

[Joey Kamasta]

Okay.

[Chris]

No, I would do poppers, though. Yeah. Mateo Lane. We did a little podcast last time. He taught me how to douche. I. I actually enjoyed that.

[Joey Kamasta]

How does he do it? Does he have an attachment on the shower? That's when you know you're disgusting.

[Chris]

What is he. No, he talked. We went into the bathroom and he. It was like something.

[Joey Kamasta]

He showed you how to do it?

[Chris]

He showed me how to do it, yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Did he stick it in his ass?

[Chris]

No, we filmed it together. No, no, he. He closed the door and he would coach me through it.

[Joey Kamasta]

Did you lay on your. On the. On the floor with your chest on the floor?

[Chris]

No, I sat up.

[Joey Kamasta]

So the water goes up into your.

[Chris]

No, I. I sat on over a toilet pole and I just put it in my ass and started squeezing.

[Joey Kamasta]

How do you get it up there? You have to. If you really want to get up there, you have to lay on the floor like this.

[Chris]

Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

Ass in the air so it goes down on a downward motion all the way up in there.

[Chris]

So I'll have to do it again. You teach me. Maybe we'll do that on the cooking show.

[Joey Kamasta]

Did you do it until the water turned clear?

[Chris]

Yes.

[Joey Kamasta]

Okay.

[Chris]

Yeah. And it was good. Yeah. And he told me. He told me, like, they came and inspected. He said, this is so.

[Joey Kamasta]

You know what? You know, if you. If you shit on someone, they call it when you're having sex. Painting him.

[Chris]

Right?

[Joey Kamasta]

Did you paint him, girl?

[Chris]

Yes, mama.

[Joey Kamasta]

Did you paint her?

[Chris]

Have you painted any men recently or. You don't do that.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Chris]

You're not. You're not gross like that.

[Chrissy]

Is it really embarrassing?

[Joey Kamasta]

I never do that.

[Chrissy]

No. Yeah.

[Chris]

Joey's very clean.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

So it's basically the same rules as hydration. You pee till you're clear and when you click your ass.

[Joey Kamasta]

If you're. If you. If you. If a girl was bottoming for you and she. You found on your dick, would you ever call her again?

[Chris]

No, it's happened to me.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

You got put in naughty circles.

[Chrissy]

Yes, one time. Yeah, one time. This isn't the Patreon, but. Okay.

[Joey Kamasta]

You can only talk about scat on

[Chris]

the patreon well, because our wives listen to this. They don't. They. The wives won't pay.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. But.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, so. Yeah, I mean sometimes there's been some pain.

[Chris]

Giannis has got poopy on his. Yeah.

[Chrissy]

I mean we've all had it. Yeah, it happens.

[Joey Kamasta]

Had to roll with that.

[Chrissy]

But I'm not a big fan though of the whoopi.

[Joey Kamasta]

I guess there are scat queens.

[Chris]

Scat queens. I've never done anal in my life actually. You haven't? No. Never done. Never received either for the.

[Joey Kamasta]

That's what you're talking about now.

[Chris]

Are you watching any. You know, because you did used to work for Barstool. Are you watching any sports? Are you watching the college tournament?

[Joey Kamasta]

I'm watching the college. My boyfriend is a huge college football player.

[Chrissy]

You have a boyfriend?

[Joey Kamasta]

I have one for four years.

[Chris]

Oh my. About him.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh my God.

[Chris]

You never talked about.

[Joey Kamasta]

I wanted him to come today.

[Chrissy]

You look like a kept woman.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, he's a big sports fan.

[Chrissy]

Oh my God.

[Joey Kamasta]

And yeah, he's. I still have to watch all the. The man. The. The march.

[Chris]

March man is so useful. Was he watching last night with the Yukon game you watched?

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, all the. All the. The bets we had to do, the. The brackets and all that.

[Chris]

Do you find. Have any of the players caught your eye? Anybody like really stand out as very handsome or high.

[Joey Kamasta]

Cooper Flag.

[Chris]

Cooper Flag. Yeah, he's in the NBA now. But you thought he's cute.

[Joey Kamasta]

Is that the wand I'm thinking of?

[Chris]

Cooper Flagg was. Yes, he was a big.

[Joey Kamasta]

He was a one draft pick.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, one draft pick.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, yeah, I remember him now.

[Chris]

What about. Here's the hani. Now can you pull up Cameron Boozer? Well, I want to see. I was interested to know because I was.

[Joey Kamasta]

This is college now.

[Chris]

This is college. Yeah. Put in Cameron Boozer. Jesse because I wanted to see. Because I personally was watching this. I said this man's a handsome man, but I was excited to have you on. What do you think this is Cameron Boozer.

[Joey Kamasta]

I mean, I couldn't bring him home, but I think he's very good looking and.

[Chrissy]

Why couldn't you bring him home?

[Joey Kamasta]

Because I'm taken. Right, right.

[Chris]

Sure.

[Chrissy]

Right. That's why.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

I can't believe you have a boyfriend. Four years.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yes.

[Chrissy]

I never took you for relationships.

[Joey Kamasta]

It just happened. Yeah, it just happened. I wasn't looking. When they fight, you find it when you're not looking for it. You wanna see a picture?

[Chrissy]

Yes. And tell us how it happened? How did that happen?

[Joey Kamasta]

Well, I met him this Is him the other day on the roof, He's a younger gentleman.

[Chris]

Oh wow, look at him. Is he on Peptides?

[Joey Kamasta]

No, he's just, he's just handsome and thin and.

[Chris]

That's your rooftop?

[Joey Kamasta]

No, it's his rooftop.

[Chris]

He got a nice place.

[Chrissy]

So he's like a bro? Kind of.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, yeah, he played, you know, football in college.

[Chrissy]

Wow.

[Joey Kamasta]

He went to college.

[Chris]

Wow.

[Chrissy]

How old?

[Joey Kamasta]

He looked 26

[Chris]

for four years. See, in the gay community it doesn't matter. Like in the gay community if you have a young boyfriend, everyone's like, girl go, I guess so.

[Joey Kamasta]

Same thing with. It's like Leonardo DiCaprio.

[Chris]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, but in our, in heterosexuals you like, you couldn't be.

[Joey Kamasta]

You're dating an older woman. No, I'm kidding.

[Chris]

I know, a few months. Well, she's a few months older than me. But, but I'm saying like I'm 41. If I had a 22 year old girlfriend, people would be like, ill. Gross. Yeah, but you, if you have your 41, have a 22 year old boyfriend, it's okay.

[Joey Kamasta]

They probably still say it's gross, but.

[Chris]

But who cares? Yeah. Gay guys don't care.

[Chrissy]

No, no, it's totally different.

[Chris]

I like, it's very freeing. We've talked about it. Freeing. Now what, so what do you. So what are you doing now? Like the pods over. So what, what are you doing besides Gasolina?

[Joey Kamasta]

So you still have a podcast?

[Chrissy]

Yeah, that's still going.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yep, yeah, so going. We're starting up a new, new concept of it. Yeah, every Friday that starting, you know, my own little cooking thing. Just doing little doodads here and there and I'm an influencer by trade.

[Chris]

Yeah, she's an influencer.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, so I just, I just, I just stunt on these hoes downtown with my fashion videos and yes. Drink coffees and you know, try to scam people for free. Shit.

[Chris]

Right now are you.

[Joey Kamasta]

Look at the bag I got.

[Chris]

Let me see.

[Joey Kamasta]

It's a $9,000 bag I got.

[Chris]

Holy. How'd you get it?

[Joey Kamasta]

Vivrel. If you go to use code JOEYCommasta at Vivrel, you get your first month free.

[Chris]

Really? Yeah. So they gave that to you for free?

[Joey Kamasta]

I have to give it back, right?

[Chrissy]

Wait, you have to give it back?

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, eventually.

[Chris]

Ye,

[Joey Kamasta]

yeah, I'm scamming the girls.

[Chrissy]

Good.

[Chris]

Yeah. You know, and I like it. Yeah. Because, and you know, and, and because you always get positive energy and I always just feel good when I watch your Instagram content. I just, it just Makes me happy.

[Joey Kamasta]

You do follow Friday for me. Do you know I lose thousands of followers every time I post?

[Chris]

Why?

[Chrissy]

Yeah, why? Said that. Why is that every time?

[Joey Kamasta]

So I wanted to post my video today to stunt on the host.

[Chris]

Sure.

[Joey Kamasta]

With my, you know, my Michael Jackson shoes on.

[Chris]

Whoa.

[Chrissy]

I've been noticing the white sock look.

[Joey Kamasta]

Is that what's very Parisian, Right.

[Chris]

And it's very JFK Jr.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yes. Oh, are you watching that?

[Chris]

I haven't, but I know I saw some of the comments on your things.

[Joey Kamasta]

They both died at the end, right? In the show.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Right.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

But, yeah, I lose. Thousands of people are hating on me.

[Chris]

Why is haters.

[Joey Kamasta]

They hate us. Because they ain't us.

[Chris]

Because they ain't us.

[Joey Kamasta]

Right.

[Chris]

I think a lot of it is they. People follow you.

[Joey Kamasta]

They always tell me to be a fat, funny person. They can't take that. I'm so hot now.

[Chris]

Well, that I think that. And I think that I think they're following you.

[Joey Kamasta]

Transplant came through.

[Chris]

Yes.

[Chrissy]

Oh, you did get.

[Joey Kamasta]

No, I went to Dr. Turchell in New Jersey.

[Chris]

Wow. It looks.

[Joey Kamasta]

Hanover.

[Chris]

It looks fantastic.

[Chrissy]

How long ago did you do it?

[Joey Kamasta]

February last year, so.

[Chrissy]

And it's just great.

[Joey Kamasta]

It's growing.

[Chrissy]

How much did it cost?

[Joey Kamasta]

I'm not sure. I think it's. It was. I don't know how much it was.

[Chrissy]

Your boyfriend paid for it? Yeah. Yeah.

[Chris]

Nice. But it feels nice to be like, kind of.

[Joey Kamasta]

You guys never needed that?

[Chris]

No, we're good so far. Our friend Jesse over here, the producer, he was talking.

[Chrissy]

He wants to get the front.

[Chris]

He was talking earlier. He wanted to get it done, but I said, let's let Joey tell us. Do you think he needs it, or do you think he's handsome without it?

[Joey Kamasta]

Handsome without it. But, you know, if you want it, just. It'll. It'll make you feel fish. You know what I mean?

[Chris]

Yeah. Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

I just want to bring it forward a little bit. Right.

[Chris]

You know? Yeah.

[Chrissy]

Fill in this area right here.

[Joey Kamasta]

There's no reason you don't feel anything. You just sit there and they put you on drugs and just, like, you zone out.

[Chrissy]

But what about the two weeks afterward?

[Chris]

Does it is like it?

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. I don't remember. I think you just, like. You sit up, you sleep sitting up. Like Frankenstein.

[Chris]

Right, Right.

[Chrissy]

But it's worth every penny, right?

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, yeah.

[Chris]

Yeah. But you also. Your lips, too, are low.

[Joey Kamasta]

Those are also plumped.

[Chris]

Yeah. Plumped up. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. I. You know, I said. I just came back. I had a black eye because I. I did some experimental Fillers. And I looked like I got punched. But now it's all down, right? It's all. It's all. It's all smoothed out.

[Chris]

Yes.

[Joey Kamasta]

You know, you gotta keep. Keep up with yourself. I'm almost 60 years old.

[Chris]

Yeah. Are you really?

[Joey Kamasta]

No.

[Chris]

How old are you?

[Joey Kamasta]

47. 47.

[Chris]

You know, I did not know. I thought you were in your late 30s. Girl.

[Chrissy]

20s. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

When I ig'd you when you first came over that time.

[Chris]

Yeah, sure.

[Joey Kamasta]

That I wasn't being Cat.

[Chris]

I know, I know. It wasn't a minor. Oh, look.

[Chrissy]

Oh, look at Rob Kelly. Look at that.

[Chris]

He's another skinny one.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, he looks good. Yeah, yeah, he. Yeah, that's Joey Master. Yeah. Who's that behind him?

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, they can hear us talking.

[Chris]

Yeah, yeah. That's for you. Yeah. No, probably not.

[Chrissy]

Is that

[Joey Kamasta]

soon?

[Chris]

Yeah. He looks horrible.

[Chrissy]

Now, what do you think about what's going on with. With Ariana Grande?

[Joey Kamasta]

What's going on with her?

[Chrissy]

She just looks like she's like. She's getting. Like she has no blood in her body.

[Joey Kamasta]

Well, I think that she's trying to do all the years of damage she did with her Blackiana Persona. She was trying to be Latina, then she was trying to be black, and then she was trying to be whatever else she was.

[Chrissy]

I mean, look at this. Is that not concerning?

[Joey Kamasta]

Well, I'm jealous.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

I mean, and then she went through the Asian phase, I think. Then she went through her Korean phase, where she was trying to be Korean.

[Chrissy]

What. What is she. Is she.

[Joey Kamasta]

I think she's just like a. She's Latino. Is she Latina? Oh, she's Italian from Long island, girl. I think she's Italian from Long island.

[Chris]

Like you.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. I don't know, I just. I think she needs more mascara.

[Chrissy]

Do you think she still needs to lose a few?

[Joey Kamasta]

Maybe.

[Chris]

But this, this you would like. You would not mind looking like that. That's goals.

[Chrissy]

You don't think that's concerning a little bit? I can see a rib cage.

[Chris]

Yeah, but whatever, right?

[Joey Kamasta]

I just think she needs. Maybe she's a ponytail, but. Ponytail.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

I don't mind. I don't mind. You know, in my generation, it was, you know, you're considered successful if you look like you're about to die.

[Chris]

Yeah, right. That's what it is.

[Joey Kamasta]

You know, the gates, it was either you couldn't be skinny and just, you know, and feel. I mean, I doubt you already had aids.

[Chris]

So wait, so where you're from, New Jersey or Long Island?

[Joey Kamasta]

New Jersey?

[Chris]

You're from New Jersey. Okay. So when you go home now, the new you. New sexy you smell to you. Well, like, how are you received in the town?

[Joey Kamasta]

I don't like to go around. I don't like to be in public that. That area.

[Chris]

Why? Because conservative.

[Joey Kamasta]

I'm just too good for it.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

I mean, yeah. Yeah. I get like.

[Chrissy]

I.

[Joey Kamasta]

They know I'm there, but I don't want to, like, be harassed and stuff like that. You don't give them the. I don't want to give them the benefit of saying they rubbed elbows with.

[Chris]

Sure. No, because. Because that's one thing about Joey we've talked about. He's always got positive energy. You always walk with kind of the confidence that, you know you're better, and I like that.

[Chrissy]

Well, I want to live. I want to live in the place where Joey is living.

[Chris]

Right.

[Chrissy]

Because then, you know, you're in a place that's good.

[Joey Kamasta]

Are you watching Paradise?

[Chrissy]

No, I never heard of.

[Chris]

But I saw the first season and it was amazing. Is the second season even better?

[Joey Kamasta]

It did. Just carries on. But I. You know, I like that they live underground. That's where I want to live. I want to live in an exclusive, like, Underground.

[Chris]

Once I finish the show, the pit. I'm almost through the show. The pit, the medical drama. It's a lot too. Yeah. My daughters. And we watch it with my daughters. And then the little one yesterday was like, can you please turn this off? It's scaring me. It's too much blood. Oh, yeah. So we had to stop.

[Chrissy]

What is Paradise.

[Chris]

Paradise about?

[Joey Kamasta]

It's like a dystopian. It's like almost like if it was the last. Like the last of us. And then like, what's the other one? I think it's like.

[Chris]

It's like if the world ended.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Type thing. Yeah. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

But if the world ended and they live in. They. So all the elites, they got. They. They carved out the side of a mountain. They have a whole real world in there with, like, a sky and everything else. They live in there, but there's still an outside world.

[Chris]

But it feels. Feels very much like what could be 20 years from now.

[Chrissy]

Fashion. Is fashion going anywhere new? Because Just seems like we're recycling. Is there anything new coming?

[Joey Kamasta]

Everything old is new again. The 90s are very.

[Chris]

Baggies are. Baggy clothes are back.

[Joey Kamasta]

Baggy clothes. Yeah. That's why I say you can't have any. That's very 2016. A skinny Jean in a Chelsea boot.

[Chris]

Right. You'll spoon out. Look.

[Joey Kamasta]

Let me see what she has on.

[Chris]

This isn't right.

[Joey Kamasta]

No, the ankles, the calves are too tight. You need a straight leg. You know what you need to get. You need to get a 501 Levi's.

[Chris]

So a little bit baggier.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. But not too. Not too much on the ass and thighs. You want it. You want it fitted, but then like straight legged.

[Chris]

Right. He is sweatshirt up here.

[Joey Kamasta]

He looked crew neck. Because crew necks are good. Yeah, yeah. No, I love it. I love the queen.

[Chrissy]

I saw you looking at his dick print to see if it was there.

[Joey Kamasta]

I remembered that last time he showed it to me, but it was. It was folded up on his stomach.

[Chris]

It's good, right? Yeah, yeah, I love it. Yeah. Because I remember one time he asked me.

[Joey Kamasta]

You showed it to me, right?

[Chris]

I showed it to him. But then I remember one time I came in to do him and took podcast and he requested I wear gray sweats.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Okay, good. No, because that means a lot to me that I get approved by Joey.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, no, I.

[Chris]

Handsome.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, I know.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Joey Kamasta]

Amazing.

[Chrissy]

Do you think, like, religious garb will ever come in style?

[Chris]

Religious garb? That's the one.

[Chrissy]

That's the one place we haven't gone yet. What would.

[Joey Kamasta]

What kind of beat would it be? Just like cloaks.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, like cloaks. Or like, you know, I think in

[Joey Kamasta]

some communities, definitely, like a tunic.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, Tunics.

[Chris]

Yeah, like that, Right. Chain mail.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

Like curls.

[Joey Kamasta]

Who knows?

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

The Met Gala is coming. Maybe we'll see that.

[Chrissy]

The Met Gala.

[Joey Kamasta]

Are you guys going?

[Chrissy]

No, I never get invited.

[Chris]

Have you ever been? I've never been.

[Joey Kamasta]

No.

[Chris]

It's like.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, that's not for me. I mean, I would eventually go, but

[Chris]

what is the best week? What is the best, like, for us, the best time as sports fans, straight sports fans, is we really think this, these weeks, the March Madness is what are the best for a gay man. Like, what is your. What is your March Madness? What is your super bowl of weeks?

[Chrissy]

Red carpets, right?

[Joey Kamasta]

I guess. Yeah. Well, not for me. Is there a season. Award season. I think for the gays, it's summertime because that's where they can really be disgusting.

[Chris]

Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

Fire island and.

[Chris]

But like the gay. The gay parade downtown. Not going to that. But you're not going to that. Fleet Week. Fleet Week is big. Okay. Okay.

[Joey Kamasta]

Not only that, not only the Anal Douche, but also the women that come

[Chris]

right to the port, come into the port, come right into your city. So, okay.

[Chrissy]

Are you monogamous now with him?

[Chris]

Yes.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, I would never.

[Chrissy]

So, like, do you guys check each Other like, you don't. There's no grinder on.

[Joey Kamasta]

No. I mean, that's the one thing great about the relationship. I don't. I can't even even tell them I'm in a relationship because it's so, so seamless. It's just. That's why I'm still here, because it's just so easy. It's like, not that drama. It's drama free.

[Chrissy]

So you just. You were at a point where you were like, I don't want.

[Joey Kamasta]

I'm the first man he's ever been with.

[Chris]

Right. I could. I could tell that. When you showed him the picture, I could tell that.

[Chrissy]

Wait, how does that work?

[Chris]

Joey's very good. We've spoken about this a few years ago. Joe's very good at getting the under. He knows how to flip. Maybe he knows how to flip.

[Chrissy]

Is he gay?

[Joey Kamasta]

Yes, of course.

[Chrissy]

So was he an owl? Was. Was he into women before?

[Joey Kamasta]

Yes.

[Chrissy]

Is he still in women?

[Joey Kamasta]

I hope not.

[Chris]

Right?

[Joey Kamasta]

I mean, if he is, that's fine. I have the wigs and the garments.

[Chris]

Yeah, that's right.

[Joey Kamasta]

But he's not going nowhere.

[Chrissy]

So how does that. How does that happen? How does that work?

[Chris]

I don't know.

[Joey Kamasta]

I think, like.

[Chrissy]

Did you look at him and saw a vulnerability?

[Joey Kamasta]

That's her.

[Chrissy]

You spooked her.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

What do you mean?

[Joey Kamasta]

I just. I didn't know. I just. I just. I just said hello just to be. Just. Cause I thought it was cute.

[Chris]

Do your mom and dad like him?

[Joey Kamasta]

My mom's dad, but yeah, my dad likes him. Yeah.

[Chris]

Yeah, his dad likes him.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Yeah. Your dad is. Your dad you've always spoke about. You get. You have a great relationship with your dad.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, he's bisexual.

[Chris]

Is he?

[Joey Kamasta]

I don't know.

[Chrissy]

I remember you said you think he is.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, I think he is.

[Chris]

Interesting. Do our brothers and sisters, what do they do? What's their life like?

[Joey Kamasta]

My older sister lives. She moved down to South Carolina to. Because it was too. The New York. The tri state area was too blue for her, so she had to get out of here.

[Chris]

Right. Go red.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. So she went red. She went to South Carolina. She lives down there.

[Chris]

But she loves you.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chris]

So that's what I'm saying.

[Joey Kamasta]

So they all live down there. And then my other sister lives in, you know, she just lives in Jersey and with her dog.

[Chrissy]

Are those color contacts?

[Joey Kamasta]

They're not color contacts. They are clear contacts, but they have like the color on them so you can find them.

[Chrissy]

Oh, right.

[Chris]

Yeah. But he's always had light Eyes.

[Chrissy]

He got nice eyes.

[Joey Kamasta]

Light eyes.

[Chris]

No, he looks great. I'm telling you.

[Joey Kamasta]

I can't see close up, though. I have to wear readers.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Chrissy]

I want to know more about this, though, to be honest with you. I really want to know. So you said hello to him. Like, what happened? How did it happen?

[Joey Kamasta]

I was at a bar, and he comes in.

[Chrissy]

He was like a guy with his guy friends, and they were like, the game's on. And you were like, hi.

[Joey Kamasta]

No, he was there first. And I walked in and I said, yo, you got a fat ass.

[Chrissy]

That's how it started.

[Joey Kamasta]

For real introduction to him.

[Chrissy]

That's a first. You mean it?

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, Because I don't give a foul. I have nothing. The thing about getting older is, like, you have no shame about anything. There's nothing that embarrassed me. I love it. Nothing at all.

[Chrissy]

Yeah. You're comfortable in your own skin.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Because you. Who cares?

[Joey Kamasta]

So I said, you know, just, Just. Just to be funny and, like, you know, so what's the worst that can happen? He punches me. I'd probably like it.

[Chris]

Yeah. Seriously? Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

I just said, you got fat ass. And then, you know, he starts trickling around. He asked me for my Snapchat.

[Chris]

Right. That. That was the first way.

[Chrissy]

Now, do you think it's because the younger generations are a little bit more open, a little looser, or do you

[Chris]

think he was just.

[Chrissy]

He was always gay and he was just hiding?

[Joey Kamasta]

I think he just was. He was just in love with me. And it's like, oh, my God.

[Chrissy]

So you. You think it's above sexuality?

[Joey Kamasta]

What do you mean?

[Chrissy]

You think, like, he just loves you? It doesn't even matter? Like.

[Joey Kamasta]

No, I. I don't know. He's definitely homosexual.

[Chris]

But, but, but, but. But there are. There are people that fall in love with just one person. Yeah. From the same sex, and then that. That relationship fades away and then they go back to the opposite.

[Joey Kamasta]

That's.

[Chris]

That happens.

[Joey Kamasta]

That's like when married couples, one transitions and they still stay together.

[Chris]

Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

It's my wife Carol.

[Chrissy]

Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

You know what I'm talking about?

[Chris]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

And they just stay together for convenience.

[Chris]

Right, Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

Positioning. I'm. That's why I'm growing my hair out.

[Chris]

Like, would you really seriously consider it? Never.

[Joey Kamasta]

Not at this age.

[Chris]

Right. Not at this age.

[Chrissy]

But if it earlier, if you had thought about, would you have done it earlier?

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

You would have done it.

[Chris]

Yeah. You want.

[Joey Kamasta]

I still want to do it. Just for fun, Just for attention.

[Chris]

Just for attention.

[Joey Kamasta]

Right.

[Chris]

Yeah. Because you do look more feminine Than you. Than you used to.

[Joey Kamasta]

Thank you.

[Chris]

But I. But on your cheeks, right? Oh, the cheeks too. That. Because I noticed the lift, but also the cheeks. So you do that.

[Joey Kamasta]

It's called snap. Are you guys watching Drag Race?

[Chris]

Nick is probably.

[Chrissy]

My wife fucking loves Drag Race. Does she? Yeah, she watches it big. Yeah, yeah, she's into that. She's into JFK junior right now and some other show that I don't give a shit about.

[Joey Kamasta]

Jane don't went home this week.

[Chrissy]

I'm gonna ask her.

[Chris]

Yeah, my wife follows you. Joey loves you. So she was a fan of mine because I think. I think, you know what it is about you, about your content. It's. It's. Yes, we all have to make content to feed the algorithm, but yours comes from an authentic place.

[Joey Kamasta]

Does she still do fitness?

[Chris]

Yes, she does fitness. And we really have a great relationship now. We've kind of moved, you know, really nice, stable. Nice.

[Chrissy]

Okay, good.

[Chris]

You know, we got our. We got our three kids and I think also too, I've. I've just accepted it. I've accepted her into my life and I've accepted Jesus into my life.

[Joey Kamasta]

Okay. And she doesn't care that you're exploring other avenues of your sexuality?

[Chris]

She knows she doesn't care. No, she. You know, she really. She really doesn't care. She doesn't care. Like, you know what I mean?

[Joey Kamasta]

You can have a great essence Hall.

[Chris]

Yeah. Okay.

[Chrissy]

Yeah. When you look at Chris, what do you see? Do you see a straight man?

[Chris]

He's told me before, I'm straight.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, well, he's definitely straight. But he wish he. He's open, though, really want. He wishes he could be gay. And he tries.

[Chrissy]

He wants.

[Chris]

But I'm not, though, because Mateo, Joey told me bad, but Mateo can't have it. Mateo told me very similar. He goes, you're. You're. You're. Unfortunately, he was like, you're also living a nightmare, too, because he said, you're trapped. You are straight and you'll always be

[Chrissy]

straight, so you feel burdened by it.

[Chris]

Right? He said so. But you're. You're never going to be gay. I can just tell. He's like, I can't. He told me. He was like, I can't even articulate it. But I.

[Joey Kamasta]

You don't feel great enough as you can't be your greatest self as a straight man. You're.

[Chris]

You're right.

[Joey Kamasta]

You're the greatness. This is lies. And as you get in the gay world, like, you start this, you're capped out. You can't do anything. You can't be better than you are now.

[Chris]

Exactly. Yeah. He told me to maybe try ayahuasca and then he would suck my dick and see how I felt. Yeah.

[Chrissy]

And how about me? I can't fully be a straight guy and pull off that Maurice. There's got to be some gay in me.

[Joey Kamasta]

It's. Marissa still around? Same way.

[Chrissy]

I mean, she's still around. I mean, I don't know, a long time, but she's around.

[Chris]

Well, if you go on cameo for the right price, she's still around.

[Joey Kamasta]

What if you, if you were doing your Marisa character back then and you were, you're. You're abusing substances, do you think you would let like a Dominican guy from up. Up there, like, you know, fuck you like that?

[Chris]

Just pop.

[Joey Kamasta]

If you're really into the character.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

And they had the meth or whatever the drugs are. Yeah.

[Chrissy]

Why not?

[Chris]

Why not?

[Chrissy]

Short, right?

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

I'm sure if I just stayed in character and got.

[Chris]

Well, that, that, I mean, who cares, right? Because it's just a moment of your life.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

It's just a few. It's just a few. Weird.

[Joey Kamasta]

Really committing to the bed.

[Chris]

Yeah, well, but that, that's what I like about Joey. That's the positivities. I think we get so rigid, especially in religion and all that. Joey lives. You seem to me to be a person who does what you want to do almost on a daily basis.

[Joey Kamasta]

I do.

[Chris]

And you have fun and you're kind of non apologetic about it all.

[Joey Kamasta]

I love that you do things. Lead your life with good intentions and kindness in your heart.

[Chris]

Didn't we say that last week?

[Joey Kamasta]

If you're choosing kindness, just choose kindness.

[Chris]

Yeah, choose kindness and cock.

[Chrissy]

Cause let me tell you something. Ruff Greens sent us a bunch of stuff. We both got dogs. I have two dogs giving it to them. All you gotta do is sprinkle it in with their food. They also gave me some nice treats that my dogs have been loving. Ruff Greens is a very cool company to check out if you own a dog.

[Chris]

Cause do Rough Greens. My dog love it. Dog food is dead food. Okay? Traditional dog food is shelf stable for years because it's lifeless. Rough greens brings the nutrition back. Packed with live vitamins, minerals, probiotics, digestive enzymes and omega oils. Cuz it's all about them omega threes. So don't change your dog's food, just add Ruff Greens. Ruff Greens is offering a free Jumpstart trial bag. You just cover shipping, use the discount code Hyenas. H Y E N A S to claim your free Jumpstart trial [e-mail] that's R U F F greens.com promo code HYENAS. So don't change your dog's food, just add rough greens and watch the health benefits come alive.

[Chrissy]

Ooh, cuz, tell me about a way to get a full of head of hair.

[Chris]

Cause I only got one word for you and one word only, and that's hims. Ooh, yeah, you like Hims. Hims offers convenient access to a range of prescription hair loss treatments with ingredients that work, including chews, oral medication, serums, and sprays, which I like a little serum and I like a spray.

[Chrissy]

I like that they throw the kitchen sink at this. They give you options on how to deal with it.

[Chris]

Yeah, it's really, really nice. Find the right hair regrowth treatment for you with flexible subscription options, access to 247 provider support, and once a day treat options that fit your daily routine.

[Chrissy]

Yeah. For simple online access to personalized and affordable care for hair loss, ED, weight loss, and more, visit hims.comhyenas that's hims.comhyenas for your free online visit hims.comhyenAS Featured products include compounded drug products which the FDA does not approve or verify for safety, effectiveness or quality. Prescription required. See website for full details, restrictions and important safety information. Individual results may vary based on studies of topical and oral minoxidil and finasteride. People take things way too seriously.

[Chris]

Ugh.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, I don't have time for it.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Chris]

No, you almost feel like he's.

[Joey Kamasta]

Have you been canceled? Have you guys been canceled yet?

[Chris]

They've tried, you know. Well, I mean, in a way. Not. Not canceled. I mean, you know, in a way, like, people try all the time, but we kind of feel like, especially because of this podcast like the Patreon and all that, like, and we have our fans. Like, it's really.

[Joey Kamasta]

How much does Patreon cost?

[Chris]

We're only $5.

[Joey Kamasta]

$5 a month.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

And you show, you show. You show cock on.

[Chris]

We show cog on. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Chrissy]

We show Chris's feet on.

[Chris]

That's where we go. Yeah, yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

And who is a third? Who are these people here?

[Chris]

Well, that's.

[Joey Kamasta]

That's you two. And then who's the headlock and the governor?

[Chrissy]

When he got his head blown off,

[Joey Kamasta]

the governor was in the car with him.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chris]

That's moments for JFK got shot. We were there drinking smoothies. Yeah. So. So I think that, because I think that there's something about as you keyed in on like as we get older where you just really have to get to like a level of acceptance. And you have. And that's why I'm doing peptides now. I'm saying, you know what, which one are you taking?

[Joey Kamasta]

I'm ready.

[Chris]

We're trying, we're trying. Retatrutide. We're trying. BPC157, that's for this weight loss.

[Joey Kamasta]

The ratatouille.

[Chris]

I'm micro dosing it because it's for weight loss and I have high cholesterol, so it supposedly helps. The cholesterol.

[Joey Kamasta]

Triglycerides.

[Chris]

You had high cholesterol?

[Joey Kamasta]

I had triglycerides really high.

[Chris]

And now they're down, right?

[Joey Kamasta]

They're down, yeah.

[Chris]

Now you're good.

[Joey Kamasta]

Well, I still want to lose more,

[Chris]

but because of the GLPs, your cholesterol.

[Joey Kamasta]

What's your waist size? Now I know you're famous.

[Chris]

You were 38, size 36 now. Comfy. One fee in a 36.

[Joey Kamasta]

Okay, good. Yeah, I can't buy new clothes yet because I'm not ready for it, but.

[Chris]

Well, how much have you lost? You must have lost 30 pounds.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, like 30 something pounds.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

Appetite away though.

[Joey Kamasta]

Is that what it is?

[Chris]

Yes, it's an appetite suppressant.

[Joey Kamasta]

Appetite suppressant. So I like, you know, you eat like a bird, right?

[Chris]

Right.

[Chrissy]

So that's how it works. Really makes sense.

[Joey Kamasta]

But it pisses me off because I have the disease in me is the, is the. Not bulimia, what's it called?

[Chris]

Anorexia?

[Joey Kamasta]

Not anorexia, it's overeating. Binge eating, nausea. No, binge eating is my disease. Like overeating. That's like my food is my drug. So like I can't like, I want to like eat the whole pizza and immune makes me mad that I can't eat it anymore. So I'm not fulfilled. Like, even if I'm like, I'm full, but I'm pissed off that I can't harm myself with food.

[Chris]

Right. But that as time goes on you'll just accept that.

[Joey Kamasta]

Well, you can out eat anything, right?

[Chrissy]

You can keep going if you want,

[Chris]

but you like the way you feel now better than how you felt being

[Joey Kamasta]

able to eat all the pizza.

[Chris]

Do you want a little peanut butter cookie?

[Joey Kamasta]

I can't right now. I'm not supposed to. I'm doing intermittent fasting. I can't eat till 3.

[Chris]

Do you have the zero fasting app? Which app do you have?

[Joey Kamasta]

I have that, but I just know the clock.

[Chris]

Three o'. Clock. Yeah. Okay.

[Joey Kamasta]

Another app on my phone.

[Chrissy]

So my wife is watching Outlander.

[Chris]

Outlander's a great show.

[Joey Kamasta]

She about.

[Chris]

She just finished Back in Time.

[Chrissy]

Love Story.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, that's. That's the jfk.

[Chrissy]

Oh, is that. And then Scarpetta.

[Joey Kamasta]

I want to watch that. That's with what's her face. Nicole Kidman. And who, who's the other on there? Can we pull that up?

[Chris]

Scarpetta is a great restaurant in the city.

[Joey Kamasta]

I love that restaurant. It's my favorite spaghetti in the city.

[Chris]

My favorite spaghetti too.

[Joey Kamasta]

It's the best.

[Chrissy]

Yes.

[Chris]

And I.

[Joey Kamasta]

Right there.

[Chris]

Okay. And then they have the little lounge downstairs. You ever go down?

[Joey Kamasta]

I never went down there, but I, I there a lot. There it is. It's. Oh, Jamie Lee Curtis. She's trans. She's non binary. No.

[Chris]

Really?

[Joey Kamasta]

Hermaphrodite.

[Chris]

No.

[Chrissy]

Her daughter. Her daughter is trans.

[Joey Kamasta]

No, but she was born hermaphrodite. She was born with both gen.

[Chrissy]

I think that's a rumor.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, is it?

[Chris]

Well, I don't know.

[Chrissy]

I think that's one of those Richard Gear.

[Joey Kamasta]

Bobby Conville. I'd eat his ass. Is that his son?

[Chris]

That's his son. Yeah. Get him too.

[Chrissy]

Oh, you like him?

[Chris]

Yeah. And he's married to Rose Burns.

[Chrissy]

That expression.

[Joey Kamasta]

No, Bobby Canavel's married. Who's Jake Cannon?

[Chris]

Must be his son. It has to be his son.

[Joey Kamasta]

Google Jake Cannaville Hole.

[Chris]

Yes. Jake Cannaval Hole. Yeah. That's his son.

[Chrissy]

He is hot.

[Chris]

Oh yeah. Put up Jake Cannaval Hole. Joey. Put hole after the name in search. You see that? If you go up, go back.

[Joey Kamasta]

It was already on there.

[Chris]

Yeah, if you just go back. Yeah, if you just put that in. I'd like to see the results. Jake kind of a hole. That's it. Let's see what comes up. Anything?

[Joey Kamasta]

Nothing else magazine.

[Chris]

Okay. Yeah. Hungry for hole.

[Joey Kamasta]

Cute. Wait, cute. Wait. Shows off his cute butt.

[Chris]

Let's see this in 2019. Let's see his butt. You like that? Yeah. Let's see. Let's see. Oh, wow. What the tats.

[Joey Kamasta]

Definitely has a Latina mother.

[Chris]

Has to, right?

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. Okay. Are your kids considered biracial?

[Chris]

They are half Puerto Rican, half white.

[Chrissy]

Is that really biracial though?

[Chris]

It is, it is. I. I googled it and it.

[Joey Kamasta]

What kind of perks can you get?

[Chris]

Yeah. For that they are. Well, they'll get into a good college. Yeah, yeah. Because obviously, you know, you go Latino for that. They. They know multiple languages.

[Joey Kamasta]

They can win an argument.

[Chris]

They can win an argument big time. They win an argument. They are good at baseball naturally. And they are going to be really, really, really beautiful. That's the thing is, you know, especially my, my daughters. They. People like, you know how like people

[Joey Kamasta]

say imagine they turn out like J. Lo's kids. Everyone thinks you guys are so good looking and they shut. Do you know what JLo's kids look like?

[Chris]

No.

[Chrissy]

P up.

[Chris]

I don't know.

[Joey Kamasta]

One's trans.

[Chris]

Really. Well, that would actually be. As a father, that would be a relief, right. If the, if our kids.

[Joey Kamasta]

Do you know which one you prefer to. To transition if, if you had to pick one.

[Chris]

If I had to pick one. I.

[Joey Kamasta]

Those are kids looking kids.

[Chrissy]

She went from girl to boy saying

[Joey Kamasta]

like, you know how hot she is. You would think she'd have the hottest kids.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

You know they're not. They're every kid's beautiful in some people's eyes. But I'm just saying, I mean that

[Chris]

one looks like Mark Anthony. That's Mark Anthony's kid, right? With the glasses.

[Joey Kamasta]

You know, you would think that what

[Chrissy]

is going on with the. There's so many trans kids in Hollywood is that like a lot of people have trans kids.

[Joey Kamasta]

There's not room for everyone want.

[Chrissy]

There's just not.

[Chris]

What do you think? Do you have any insight into that? Why it happens a lot in Hollywood?

[Joey Kamasta]

Because they, because celebrities. Kids aren't used. Aren't used to being told no. And celebrities are not used to being told no. That's probably. You are a raging bulldike and it's okay. But we're not going to say that. You're not going to admit that anything is wrong. You're going to be like, oh no. That you're just transgender. No, you're just a dyke.

[Chris]

Look at interesting.

[Chrissy]

Look at all the. These are trans kids.

[Chris]

That's an interesting take. It's because they never get told no. I.

[Joey Kamasta]

It's interesting and they don't. They. They don't want to take accountability. It's okay to be a flaming right.

[Chris]

It's okay.

[Joey Kamasta]

Have to. You don't have to transition.

[Chris]

Well, I, I told your. I've told the story before.

[Joey Kamasta]

Who is that?

[Chrissy]

This is Annette and Warren Benning's kid was a girl. Girl, now boy.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Chrissy]

Then we got Charlize Theron.

[Chris]

Right. And she's adopted kids and made him trans. Which is interesting. Yes.

[Chrissy]

Sheriff.

[Chris]

Oh, that's the famous one that looks like a before and after of Joey Commander.

[Chrissy]

He was.

[Joey Kamasta]

That is.

[Chrissy]

He was like the trailblazer yeah.

[Chris]

Doesn't that. Right. Like Joey before and after. Yeah, Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

I gotta get that hat. Oh, who's that?

[Chris]

Who the hell is that?

[Chrissy]

Colleen Bartry and Deb.

[Chris]

I don't know. I don't know. All right? I don't know.

[Chrissy]

Cynthia Nixon.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, well, that's bound to happen. Sure.

[Chris]

Sure. D. Wade. We know. That's a boy in the middle. Yeah.

[Chrissy]

Stop. What do you mean? That's a boy.

[Chris]

That's a boy. No, no, no.

[Joey Kamasta]

That.

[Chris]

That's a. That's a boy.

[Joey Kamasta]

You mean it?

[Chrissy]

It's a girl.

[Chris]

Now that's a girl. Sorry about that.

[Joey Kamasta]

Diane turned into Ziya.

[Chris]

Right, right, right.

[Joey Kamasta]

I changed the last letter.

[Chris]

Right. Yeah, yeah.

[Chrissy]

Maurice. Maura.

[Chris]

Right?

[Joey Kamasta]

Is this one. This is trans Heather.

[Chrissy]

Debra.

[Joey Kamasta]

She's my friend. I know. She's on my podcast all the time.

[Chris]

Heather. That's her.

[Joey Kamasta]

All her kids are either gay or trans or something else.

[Chris]

So just. Okay.

[Chrissy]

Jamie Lee. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

They said, we don't know. I. I can't tell which one of my kids is trans. She said, yeah, we can.

[Chris]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

All the money in the world and your kid is still clockable.

[Chris]

Right.

[Chrissy]

What does that mean? Clockable?

[Joey Kamasta]

They can tell, like, when you can clock.

[Chrissy]

Oh, clock.

[Joey Kamasta]

Unclock it. Clock it. Clock it.

[Chris]

Right.

[Chrissy]

So clock it means you can tell that they're trans.

[Joey Kamasta]

You can just. Yeah. Spooked or spooked.

[Chrissy]

What does that mean?

[Joey Kamasta]

Spooked means, like, I found out, like.

[Chris]

Oh, right.

[Joey Kamasta]

Spooked is more like. More so like they didn't know you were trans and they find out, like.

[Chris]

Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

Like. Like you. Like, you hook up with someone and then they find. They figure it out about. Clocked is more like you said, across the room. You can always tell.

[Chris]

Yeah. So. So spooked has a different meaning to father from New Jersey.

[Joey Kamasta]

Exactly. So the vocabulary changes as the decades go on. So originally, the word derives from.

[Chris]

Yes. Yeah.

[Chrissy]

Yes.

[Chris]

Yeah. Yes. We play that game.

[Chrissy]

But Naomi Watts's kid, you cannot.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, that's a prayer.

[Chris]

You can't. Beautiful.

[Chrissy]

Can't clock.

[Joey Kamasta]

No. They put the effort and time into their transition.

[Chris]

This is exactly.

[Joey Kamasta]

They added a braid. They added. Say something. Braids to offset the eye.

[Chris]

I swear to God, my little daughter, my baby daughter looks like that. So she might already. She might. She might have been a boy. I don't know.

[Chrissy]

You cannot. That's not clockable.

[Chris]

That's not clockable. Right, Joey?

[Chrissy]

No, that's not clockable.

[Joey Kamasta]

Not just she has to choke around to cover the Adam's apple, but.

[Chris]

Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

It's just Key details that we have to pay attention to. We stay vigilant out there, ladies.

[Chris]

Yes. We didn't really do.

[Chrissy]

Yes.

[Chris]

Stay vig now.

[Joey Kamasta]

They try to change, trick the eye,

[Chris]

but Joey can clock.

[Joey Kamasta]

Okay.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, keep going, Jess.

[Chris]

Yeah, let's see, let's see.

[Chrissy]

I don't know what's going on there.

[Chris]

Yeah, that's an easy one.

[Chrissy]

She's not transition, though.

[Chris]

No, no, no, no, no. Old school lesbian. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chrissy]

Oh, Shade's got.

[Chris]

Wait, what the hell?

[Chrissy]

Transition.

[Chris]

That's not clockable, Joey, come on.

[Joey Kamasta]

It's not.

[Chris]

Right. You think that's a. That looks like it's just a gay

[Chrissy]

man to you, but in person, you would probably see that he's five, three. Yeah, that's clockable with hips. With a little bit of the hips,

[Joey Kamasta]

so you'd see it.

[Chrissy]

Sigourney Weaver's got one kind of clockable.

[Chris]

Wait, so that's a girl now or that's a boy?

[Joey Kamasta]

You never. You never can tell.

[Chrissy]

Joey's father. Joey's father would call it an it.

[Chris]

Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

I think that this is. It's. I mean, it's definitely a woman that's trying to. But she's not committing to the role just yet.

[Chris]

Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

This is for attention for sure.

[Chrissy]

That one, you can tell Clock that.

[Joey Kamasta]

And then the other one, what's their name? Kamala Harris, step. Stepdaughter is doing it for attention as well.

[Chris]

You can tell, right?

[Joey Kamasta]

Well, she's not transition. She's just angry looking.

[Chris]

So I've said this before, but, you know, Jasmine has a transgender uncle, T.T. jerry. Oh, yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

So, yes, yes, yes.

[Chris]

I remember T.T. so Titi said, you know, he was incarcerated in the 90s, all of the 90s. And he said when he went into whatever prison, I think Clinton Correctional Facility, they had. They had two people in the transgender wing. He goes. And then by the time he got out of that prison in 2021, he stayed. I think he's 30 years or 28 years, something like that. He said there was a full transgender wing. He said, so it started with two. He goes, I never moved. I stayed in that set. I stayed in that.

[Joey Kamasta]

He goes.

[Chris]

And he goes. And then all of a sudden, there's 600 transgender people. He said, so something on the outside changed. He was like, I don't know what it is, but he. The reason why I thought of it is because he said he thinks it's mostly for attention.

[Joey Kamasta]

Attention, but also. Well, there's two things happening that maybe they're doing it. They're transitioning. Just so they get better service in when they're incarcerated. Well, so I thought, like the people, like the Jews that they say, I need a kosher meal.

[Chris]

Right, right. That could be that. But. But he. But I.

[Joey Kamasta]

Special treatment.

[Chris]

But see, I brought that up too. And he said, but that was around in the 90s. You would get the special treatment. He goes, something. They were coming in with their dicks cut off.

[Joey Kamasta]

No. I would start rioting.

[Chris]

Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

My idea. The fuck out of here.

[Chris]

Yeah, yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, gee. Holding this down.

[Chris]

Holding this shit down.

[Chrissy]

This thing in Trudy.

[Chris]

Yeah, it's interesting. It's just an interesting. It's just an interesting, Interesting, you know, observation on Ultra.

[Joey Kamasta]

Elliot. Oh, Elliot. That's the other Elliot page.

[Chris]

Sure. Yeah, Elliot. I have her. His book. Do you. What do you think about AI? What's your take on AI and all that's happening with robots and stuff.

[Joey Kamasta]

I don't like it. When it comes to something that I get excited about, thinking it's real. Not like. Well, for instance, like the talking animals. Like, I get so upset that they're really the animals. Really don't talk like that. Like, I want my dog to like, you know what?

[Chrissy]

New mom.

[Chris]

Really?

[Joey Kamasta]

A dog?

[Chris]

What kind of dog?

[Joey Kamasta]

A Chihuahua.

[Chris]

Whoa.

[Joey Kamasta]

He's my whole life.

[Chris]

It's a Mexican. You're taking in migrants.

[Joey Kamasta]

Thank you. I did it for a tax break.

[Chris]

Yes. What's its name?

[Joey Kamasta]

Piccolo.

[Chris]

Oh, Piccolo. Oh, man, look at Piccolo. Wow.

[Chrissy]

Is he a snappy one.

[Joey Kamasta]

He's the best.

[Chris]

Is he a Puppy?

[Joey Kamasta]

He'll be 2 in August.

[Chris]

Now you're in the back of a yellow cab. That's not what she does. You don't take yellow cabs, do you?

[Joey Kamasta]

Well, I do if. If I do it to be relatable.

[Chris]

Got it.

[Joey Kamasta]

Here's me on the subway, but I just want to show off my contour. And I wanted to have my eight thousand dollar bag.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

In that, like, it's like a juxtaposition of.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

What's real and what.

[Chris]

Yeah. Text me that pick after the. But we'll throw that up. So.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

See? Yeah, it looked good.

[Joey Kamasta]

And speaking of AI, my jawline's AI'd there because I look like a turkey neck.

[Chris]

Really?

[Joey Kamasta]

I need a facelift. But I'm not doing it until. Because they have to cut your ears off. And I don't feel like dealing with that. Just. Yeah, that's like cut. They cut your hair and like, you pull your face up, pull it back and they cut everything off.

[Chris]

Do they temporarily cut your ears off?

[Joey Kamasta]

But they like Pull them up.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Interesting.

[Chrissy]

You gotta move them.

[Joey Kamasta]

You have to do that. And then it's like all the. It's a lot.

[Chris]

Are you exercising? You're doing resistance training?

[Joey Kamasta]

I have the gym.

[Chris]

See, there you go.

[Joey Kamasta]

I go there, but I don't know what to do when I go there. I just copy what everyone else does. You know who is going to new. A new fitness place that I'm going to go to this month is. Is. What's his face? Hank. The Hank.

[Chris]

Sinatra.

[Joey Kamasta]

Hank Sinatra has a new thing called the.

[Chris]

The Pack.

[Joey Kamasta]

The Pack. So I'm gonna go there.

[Chris]

He's gonna get on. He's gonna. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

So he's got a new thing. It's by the owners of the Rumble. The Rumble.

[Chris]

Yes.

[Joey Kamasta]

So I'm gonna go there and do classes with him. Yeah.

[Chris]

Yes.

[Joey Kamasta]

I'm gonna start doing that. I have the gym across the street I go to, but it's like a pain in the ass, and I never do. So I'm gonna start doing classes over there at the Pack.

[Chris]

Okay. Yeah. Because he's been trying to get me to go to the Pack. Maybe you can go. I mean, he's. You want to talk about jacked and ripped and shredded?

[Joey Kamasta]

Look at that.

[Chris]

He's a kid and he's on GLP1.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, is he?

[Chris]

And look at how muscular he is.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. Juice. Guys drink?

[Chris]

Still very little.

[Chrissy]

I don't get much out of it anymore either.

[Chris]

I kind of. Something happened in my brain where I'm like, oh, alcohol is a.

[Joey Kamasta]

You know what feels better than drinking? The neck. Waking up the next day and getting something done.

[Chris]

Yes.

[Joey Kamasta]

Do you know what I mean?

[Chris]

Yes.

[Chrissy]

What are the drugs to take now, though?

[Joey Kamasta]

Like, I mean, I can't do. I'm not really drugging anymore. Because the thing is, if I take the drugs I would want to do. I would. I just know I'd pig out on. It's like, you know, the weed gummies and all that stuff. I like the feeling of being in, like, relaxing in the couch and stuff, but it's. I just know I'm gonna pig out.

[Chrissy]

So you're pretty much sober now.

[Joey Kamasta]

I mean, I'll still do cocaine here and there.

[Chris]

Yeah, sure, once in a while.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Chris]

And how's your. How's your blood work? Well, cholesterol's good. Liver enzymes good. Everything's good.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, liver's fine. It's just my triglycerides.

[Chris]

That's. They're always very high.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. Very high. And the. The tea is very low.

[Chris]

And the tea's low. Are you gonna get, are you gonna get higher?

[Joey Kamasta]

T I, I used to take that all the time. It never really did anything for me because I, it's like I need to like what the trans, the trans people are taking and they give me that like lethal. I want my voice to go deeper. My voice wouldn't even go deeper. Nothing happens.

[Chris]

Interesting. Doesn't work.

[Joey Kamasta]

It can't subdue the girl in me.

[Chris]

Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Do it.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, it's too strong.

[Chris]

Interesting. Wow. Yeah, yeah, I know, I know we turn to all these things, all the experimental things, peptides and all these things, but really the truth is just diet, exercise and walking. Just do 12,000 steps a day and you'll be good.

[Joey Kamasta]

Honey, how many calories are you eating?

[Chris]

I mean now probably 17, 2500. Oh, I've been trying to because I want to put on more muscle.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, I'm at a deficit. I can't, I could never, you know,

[Chris]

I'm in a deb. Okay, so what do you want to do 15 hunj?

[Joey Kamasta]

I do between, I do between a thousand and seventeen.

[Chris]

Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

But I, I just, I just try, you know, I see, I'm very peckish. I see like a little bird seed here and there.

[Chris]

Oh, what do we got huzz? Mizzen and Main makes cute, cute, cute, cute, cute, cute. Menswear if you know me, you like, you know I like one thing and one thing only and that's menswear.

[Chrissy]

Yeah. Cuz the shirts they sent us are nice. And they got me perusing the website

[Chris]

because they are, are freaking cute. Cause when you put their clothes on, you'll feel the difference instantly. You can wear their clothes literally anywhere from the office to the golf course, from yard work to backyard barbecues, babe. And I know that Mizzen and Main is good cause our boy Joey Commasta wears it.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, the Mizzen in Maine.

[Chris]

Think of it.

[Chrissy]

Picture your go to white dress shirt. The one you wish you could wear all week because it looks so sharp and actually feels good.

[Chris]

Well guess what?

[Chrissy]

That's Mizzen plus Main. Yeah. Their shirts stay crisp.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

They stay comfortable.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

And somehow Chrissy, they stay looking fresh way longer than they should.

[Chris]

Mizzen Maine is a veteran led organization. We support the troops at this podcast. Committed to supporting those who serve. They offer a year round military discount and proudly give. And proudly give back to veteran organizations. Now is a great time to give them a try. And you don't have to even be in the U.S. army. You could just be in the army of God, right?

[Chrissy]

Right now, Mizzen and Maine is offering our listeners 20% off your first purchase at Mizzen and Maine.com promo code HYENAS20. That's Mizzen, spelled spelled M I, Z, Z, E, n and main M-A-I-N.com promo code HYENAS20. For 20% off mizzeninmain.com promo code HYENAS 20. And if you'd rather shop in person, you can find Mizzen in Maine stores in select states.

[Chris]

I mean, the food that you make. I mean, can we go to Joey Kamasta's Instagram? Because there's a video that you did.

[Chrissy]

Chicken parm.

[Chris]

Of the chicken parm, when.

[Joey Kamasta]

Fuck me.

[Chris]

Fuck me. That we literally, Giannis and I, I think, have sent it back and forth to each other throughout, you know, know, ever since you posted it, maybe a thousand times. Go put that. And it's our favorite video. And. Yeah, look at that.

[Chrissy]

That is a strong filter. Don't put on that one.

[Chris]

Go to the. Here, go to the real with the.

[Chrissy]

The winter hat. That's a strong filter.

[Chris]

Just go to the reels that look. Yeah, because then it's. It's up in the reels. It's pinned to the. Yeah, so that one. Yeah, so. Yeah, just hit the volume.

[Joey Kamasta]

I didn't make that. I would have.

[Chris]

Yeah, just hit that volume.

[Joey Kamasta]

It's a. Christy. Oh, my God. Me.

[Chrissy]

One more time.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, chicken.

[Chris]

Gonna close it up.

[Chrissy]

Oh, but a cow.

[Joey Kamasta]

No. Oh, no. We don't need a second one.

[Chrissy]

Yeah. They are ruining it.

[Joey Kamasta]

They ruined it. More sauce. Now you put those sloppy peppers. Get out of here now. This whole thing is dripping wet. It's sitting in a puddle. You ruined it. You ruined it. Why can't you just leave it long? This is too much now. It's all soaking wet. You know, nobody wants this. They stay making shitty sandwiches, though, that place.

[Chris]

What more.

[Joey Kamasta]

What's going on up in here? Oh, my God.

[Chrissy]

Me.

[Joey Kamasta]

I would wipe with that. Yeah, that warm cheese on your whole.

[Chris]

What place is that?

[Joey Kamasta]

It's called Sandwich Cheetos.

[Chris]

Where is it?

[Joey Kamasta]

I think it's in New Jersey.

[Chris]

What the. Why would they do that to the sandwich?

[Joey Kamasta]

They keep doing messy things like that. I think they do it with clickbait.

[Chris]

So this is. This is only 30 weeks ago, and you must be 30 pounds heavier than that. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

And look at that.

[Joey Kamasta]

You got to stay vigilant.

[Chris]

You got to stay.

[Joey Kamasta]

Are these really yours, or this is an ad?

[Chrissy]

No, those are mine.

[Chris]

Oh, yeah, but we can't yeah, but. Yeah, but we can't. Yeah, you got to turn those over. Yeah. Cu. We're sponsored by the competitor. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Lucy.

[Chris]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We love Lucy. Those are Lucy's.

[Chrissy]

Those are Lucy.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

And wait, this one too. I like when the martini one. I remember. Yeah, all the way to the left. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, we have the same glasses on. Is that where you got those glasses?

[Chrissy]

These are, you know, just Parker. These are Warby.

[Joey Kamasta]

Parker.

[Chrissy]

Parker.

[Joey Kamasta]

Remember Chrissy had those glasses?

[Chris]

Oh, yeah. I went to that little face.

[Joey Kamasta]

Is that too much to ask on a Thursday afternoon? I want an ice cold. Why didn't anyone tell me how fat I was? Crystal glass that's so heavy that it acts up. My arthritis. I want to, like, physically not be able to pick up the glass. It's so heavy and so freezing cold. Is that too much to ask on Thursday afternoon? I came in you at the farmers

[Chris]

market two years ago. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, my God. I mean, yes, Maga deep.

[Chris]

Yes, Maga deep. Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm sure you get a lot of trumpies that will get in those DMS for you.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, yeah. They want it.

[Chris]

They want it. Yeah. Because they're not allowed to.

[Joey Kamasta]

Really. Your friend Charlie, by the way.

[Chris]

Oh, yeah, yeah, I know. Yeah.

[Chrissy]

You were close.

[Chris]

Yes.

[Joey Kamasta]

Did you know him? Did you see her on tour? Did you see his wife on tour?

[Chris]

No.

[Chrissy]

She's really.

[Joey Kamasta]

The lights and. And the spectacular goes on.

[Chris]

What do they do? I haven't seen. Seen it.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, it's fireworks. It's like. It's like fireworks. And she comes in on a jet pack and she. It's. It's. It's very. It's very intense.

[Chris]

And what is she doing to, like, say that it's like. Like honoring her husband? Like, what's the tour? I don't get it.

[Joey Kamasta]

I don't know.

[Chrissy]

So you don't think she's hurting too bad?

[Joey Kamasta]

I don't.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Chris]

This one is funny to the pov. Snooki falls at the club. Go to that one that could.

[Joey Kamasta]

That's coming out this season.

[Chris]

Oh, really?

[Joey Kamasta]

The final season.

[Chris]

Look at this. Watch, look, watch, look. Because that's real. Yeah, that's authentic. Look.

[Joey Kamasta]

I thought she was dead.

[Chrissy]

Now, are they just gonna keep. Are they just gonna keep doing this show until their furniture in the living room is covered in plastic?

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. Well, the MTV version of it is gonna be done. This is the last season of it. There.

[Chrissy]

That's it.

[Joey Kamasta]

And then I think they're. They're. They're gonna maybe go to another network, but we're doing. We're doing some big, you know, know, end of the. End of the. End of the series events. Want to come?

[Chris]

I thought in December, a few months ago, we did a roast of the Jersey Shore.

[Joey Kamasta]

I saw that.

[Chris]

I thought you were going to be there.

[Joey Kamasta]

I was going to be there. It was too far away, though. I didn't feel like traveling that.

[Chris]

And I felt bad because, you know, they told me, like, you have to roast whatever, and, like, you know, I love Snooki so much, but they have to have jokes to everybody. I was like, I don't want to make fun. I was like, let me just make fun of Vinny. Let me make fun of the situation. I don't want to make fun of any of the girls. And they were like, no, you need to do jokes on the girls. And I was like, fine. And jwoww was having a good time. She was laughing, but I could tell Snooki was like. She just like, I don't want to fucking even be doing this.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, God.

[Chris]

Yeah. But I felt bad. So if you see her, tell her. I, you know, I just want to make fun of Vinnie and the situation. But the producers were like, you have to make fun of the girl.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. Last time I was here with Vinnie's podcast, he still got going on Vinny.

[Chris]

Yeah, I think. Yeah. Vinnie, Vinny. When did I talk to Vinny? I spoke to Vinnie about a month ago. Yeah, I think he's. He's still doing his pod and he's always doing stands up.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

I just did Legion of Skanks with him, like, a couple weeks ago.

[Joey Kamasta]

Do you guys. You know how in comedy. I mean, not comedy. In Dragon. Someone. Every new drag queen has a drag mother that they look up to that kind of mentors them and teaches them the way. Do they have that in comedy for stand up? I think if I wanted to do stand up, I would need a comedy mother.

[Chris]

Comedy mother. Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

And I'm with the daughter.

[Chrissy]

Right.

[Joey Kamasta]

So I need a drag mom. Chris could be your drama. A comedy drag mom.

[Chris]

Yeah. Mine was Bill Cosby. Oh, yes. No, I.

[Joey Kamasta]

Do you remember everything after passed out like that?

[Chris]

No, I would be your comedy mother. I would do that if you'd like to.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, I would like that. Where I would come to you with my notepad and, like, what I think. And then you would, like, we would come together and make a set that you cut things and say, you know, you should add this. And, like, then we add. Practice.

[Chris]

The thing, though, I don't like in our underwear. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

In Our underwear just so we're stripped down, and it's like, nothing's distracting us. It's just.

[Chris]

I never like to tell people, though, if younger comedians ask, like, for. I never like to tell them what I think is funny or not funny because it. It's. Comedy has to be all about what you think.

[Joey Kamasta]

If I. I don't think about funny. I think it's more about, like, structure. Like, start with. Start with this, and then, like, go into. To this. You know, it's like.

[Chris]

Yes, yes, yes.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, like how to. Like.

[Chris]

Yeah, like. Like. Like the mo. Yeah. Like the likability, the charisma which you have naturally. It's like, you know, I think, like, that's more important than even being funny. Like. Yeah, right. Right away. Convey likability and charisma.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. And then once. Once you get that down, your next Netflix special, I'll just open for you.

[Chris]

I would love. I mean, come on. I would love it. Why the hell not? Look at. What are you doing for the rest of the day?

[Joey Kamasta]

The rest. I'm gonna go to the farmer's market because I want to make a. A Snap Peek cocktail.

[Chris]

Ooh.

[Chrissy]

What?

[Chris]

But that you're not drinking.

[Joey Kamasta]

I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna add. I'm gonna make it just like a juice. Then you can add alcohol if you want to it. But for Easter, I always do, like. Oh, what's gonna do for Easter? Yours is different.

[Chris]

I'm going to my Aunt Janet's. Yeah, we go to hers. What about you?

[Joey Kamasta]

I'm gonna be home. My father's going to the red states to visit my sister.

[Chris]

You don't want to go?

[Joey Kamasta]

No, I can't go down in there.

[Chris]

Right. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Saving up for Paris?

[Chris]

Sure.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. I want to get bit by a cat.

[Chris]

Yeah. What is it about it?

[Joey Kamasta]

I just like getting hit by, like, not. Not hurt. But I like when a cat or a dog gets a little frisky, like, bites. It means that, like, they care about me.

[Chris]

Yeah. Yeah. You want, like, attention. We were.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. I don't want to get hurt, but, like, you know, my dog bites me. I like it.

[Chris]

We were talking about this earlier, Giannis and I, how it's like, you know, we just want to be a. Feel appreciated. What the hell is that?

[Joey Kamasta]

He bit me.

[Chris]

Why did he bite you?

[Chrissy]

And you liked it?

[Joey Kamasta]

Because he only bites. He only. He does it jokingly because he thinks I'm his mom. So he, like, he bites and like, and like, and tossels around, but he's not, like, you know, hurting but he wouldn't bite. Like, if he doesn't, like, know you, he's not going to bite you. Right?

[Chris]

Are you on blood thinners? I feel like it's just pretty deep bruising

[Chrissy]

or it was a bad bite.

[Chris]

Yeah, yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, you know what? That's not from him.

[Chrissy]

That's from your boyfriend.

[Joey Kamasta]

No, that's from. No, that's from when I got. I was doing prp. So they take your blood and.

[Chris]

What's PRP Prep?

[Joey Kamasta]

No, it's when they take your blood and they spin. It's like a vampire facial. But they. They do it for my scalp. They inject in your scalp.

[Chris]

What?

[Chrissy]

Oh, really?

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. So it makes your hair grow, like,

[Chris]

even does it actually for real work?

[Joey Kamasta]

I mean, after the transplant, it helps every. Like the. The plant, the seeds, kind of.

[Chris]

Very interesting.

[Joey Kamasta]

So painful, though.

[Chris]

Really? Ugh. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Mama girl, Miss Thing.

[Chris]

Yeah, it's. What? Cause why? Because the needle in your head, your scalp.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, it was. It's excruciating. So they give you laughing gas?

[Chris]

They have to.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah. I mean, it doesn't take away the pain. It just makes you feel like, you know, you said poppers, so.

[Chris]

Yeah. But I mean, does it more painful than a penis?

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, it's the most painful thing.

[Chris]

The penis or the.

[Joey Kamasta]

No, I haven't done the penis yet. Have you had needles in your penis?

[Chris]

Oh, no, no, I meant like a penis in the butt.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, yeah. That's painful too.

[Chris]

It is, right? It's pleasurable, though, at times.

[Chrissy]

Is it pleasurable or painful?

[Joey Kamasta]

I mean, I think if you're a power bottom, it's. It's pleasurable. But if you're like. If you only do it seldomly.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Once in a while, then it's like, you know.

[Chris]

Yeah, because that's important. You have to be the muscle. In other words, training. Because even though it's the same sex. Even though it's the same sex, it's very similar to men and women. It's like you still have to have one of them do it. One guy doing one job, another guy doing another job. Guys doing the same job won't work well in a relationship. Right. Like, two power bottoms don't work.

[Joey Kamasta]

No, no, no, no.

[Chris]

That's what I'm saying. So in other. So. So even within same sex, there still is. Is kind of, you know, a boy and a girl. A boy and a girl kind of. Yeah, always. That's universal rule.

[Chrissy]

Or there's a switcher. Somebody who's a switch hitter. A switch hitter.

[Chris]

Right, right.

[Chrissy]

They call that versatility Right. Verse, Verse.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

First queen, I'm gonna go, honestly, after this, I'm gonna go to rhythm zero and.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, go there, get the blueberry matcha and then the BlackBerry matcha. It was so good. But it's probably so many calories. Share it with her.

[Chris]

Yeah, okay. And the coconut one looked good. What about that one?

[Joey Kamasta]

That was good. I didn't know that I had to stir it up. I didn't know what the cloud was on top of it. But when you stir it was clear on the bottom. I think that was coconut water and I think the top, I don't know what it was. It was like a cloud of a storm cloud or something. But then really you gotta whisk it all up in there.

[Chris]

Do you have a new one coming out? A new.

[Joey Kamasta]

Like I'm gonna go to a new one, but I have to, I have to get over there.

[Chris]

You have to find it. Yeah. Cause the rhythm zero, that's so good. And arcane is how I found out about it. And I won't go, I will not wear it.

[Joey Kamasta]

The thing is, I'm a new coffee queen. Like I. And I have the machine at home. I have a really nice like the top of the line Breville one. But I know that's like, you know, that's like Shandepin in the coffee community. Like everyone wants the La Marzocco or La Marzocco, which is like the thousand dollar one. And the coffees I bought there, they all take a battery acid. I bought, I bought the coffee beans from the. What's it called? Rhythm Nation. But those tasted like battery acids too. You gotta find the right. Get to fine tune it with your machine to get the right. The right way. It's like a pain. So then I said, fuck this. I went to a fairway and I got Stumptown Coffee. Always says me, right? So any Italian beans? Any the illies or the lavazas? All of them. Those are all good. When you get those single origin fancy beans that you get from these little shitty shots cups, you don't need it. They suck.

[Chris]

Yeah, people, a lot of people don't

[Chrissy]

know that there's good coffee and bad coffee. They just not educated.

[Chris]

They just drink coffee. Like my father just does Dunkin Donuts cure cups. Like he doesn't know it's horrible.

[Joey Kamasta]

I do espresso. So I let you know it's a whole. It's a whole world. I'm trying to get to this place where I can get one of these expensive machines, but I have to find a Loophole. I'm not paying full price.

[Chrissy]

Loophole.

[Chris]

Loophole. We talk a lot about loopholes. To us, loopholes mean, like ways to cheat on your wife where it doesn't count. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Well, this is how to get the free machine without having to pay for.

[Chris]

Yeah. Like we say, get a massage with a hand job. That's a little loophole.

[Joey Kamasta]

Has that ever happened?

[Chris]

No, I've never done it yet. But we want to. A happy ending one. We know a couple of places.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah, there's an app for it. My. My. My boyfriend's friends, all the Oral street guys, they have this app and, like, it's. It tells you where the closest. It's like a grinder for happy ending massage parlors.

[Chris]

Interesting.

[Joey Kamasta]

It tells you, like, where you are. It shows, like, you know, it's a map and it shows you where they all are.

[Chris]

But the problem is, I don't want to go in there. And then you get arrested, and then.

[Joey Kamasta]

Why would you get arrested, though? You're a paying customer, right? You're not the hooker.

[Chris]

But I understand. But wouldn't they.

[Joey Kamasta]

And you have citizenship, right?

[Chris]

And I do have citizenship. Yeah, but in Mom Donnie's New York, you never know. You just get arrested.

[Chrissy]

No, no, no. He's cool with it.

[Chris]

Oh, Mom Donnie's okay with prostitutes.

[Joey Kamasta]

As long as you're not white, right?

[Chris]

Yeah, that's what it is. Mom Donnie's coming after the whites to the whiter neighborhood. The gay community. Embrace. Mom Donnie, probably.

[Joey Kamasta]

I don't.

[Chris]

You don't? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

I voted for Cuomo.

[Chris]

Cuomo, right. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

He was there for me during my darkest times.

[Chris]

He really was.

[Joey Kamasta]

So.

[Chris]

Yeah. I mean, dude, it's true. All right, baby, so we'll let you go. Thank you so much for coming on.

[Joey Kamasta]

Everyone follow me, please. I'm losing followers by the minute.

[Chrissy]

Yes, yes.

[Joey Kamasta]

Follow Fridays. Bring those back. And. Yeah, just make sure to do that and keep up with all my. My, My antics. Yeah.

[Chris]

I'm so happy that you're back in my algorithm. It's. It was a really beautiful day.

[Chrissy]

You never left mine.

[Chris]

Well, you really.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, he's always been you.

[Joey Kamasta]

You. You scratch. I scratch your back Today. You guys have to come over and do my new show.

[Chris]

Yeah, of course. Where do you do it? Do you do it from the house?

[Joey Kamasta]

From my house. It hasn't started yet, though.

[Chris]

I want it come to your apartment anyway.

[Joey Kamasta]

Oh, yeah. Perfect. Y. Joe, any food allergies?

[Chris]

No, no.

[Chrissy]

Look at all this gorgeous food up there, too.

[Chris]

No, Joey's Joey. The way the food that he makes

[Joey Kamasta]

the history of Hyenas are top billing.

[Chrissy]

Oh, yeah, right there.

[Joey Kamasta]

I mean, love it.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, he's a great follow you have. It's so fun to follow.

[Chris]

She's with UTA United Talent.

[Joey Kamasta]

Clock it.

[Chris]

Love you, Joey. Go follow at Joey Kamasta. All right. As always, patreon.com history hyenas. We love reading out the names of the newest members. Last week we had a little bit of a weaker list. I do not suspect this list to be weak, but you never know. Let's see. You got to stick around to the end to possibly he hear your name or hear a name that's going to blow your mind. Also, before I forget, we did a thing last week where we allowed the fans to pick who the name. Who the winner was because we were in a dead heat. And they said that the winner was the MLK. Without a doubt was the MLK name. So what was that name?

[Chrissy]

Officially, MLK didn't die. So you can FaceTime in the elevator.

[Chris]

That's what it is. So that. Congratulations.

[Chrissy]

Congratulations.

[Chris]

Sabrina the Hyena. That is the winner. So we could put that name up at History Hyenas is back dot com. So you name up in lights. But of course, here's the. Here's the. The new patreon [e-mail] history hyenas get involved. That is where we have the most fun and we really go wild. So leading off the list, Frisbee and Jones and the Temple of Fume.

[Chrissy]

Whoa, wait a second. Again?

[Joey Kamasta]

Again.

[Chris]

Frisbee, Fris, Frisbeana Jones and the Temple of Fume.

[Chrissy]

Decent. Drexler.

[Chris]

Drexler. Yeah. Then we got Gaytona 500, aka Fume Paul's Drag Race.

[Chrissy]

On the list.

[Chris]

On the list.

[Chrissy]

See, coming out of the gate, straw.

[Chris]

Then we got Frisbeed up Minnesota Muzzy fleeing the Somali. Roy. Call it escaping snow. Gadishu.

[Chrissy]

Wow. Goody. That's. It's wordy, but it definitely gets a Drexler. Very good. Drexler.

[Chris]

Call me Nick's tv when they show women's wrestling switched off.

[Chrissy]

Put them on the list.

[Chris]

Put them on the list. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's fun, creative. Then we got.

[Chrissy]

Wow, that's four in a row.

[Chris]

Yeah. Then we got Mexi Wexy with a gay brother and a dad who moves the vegetables. Okay.

[Chrissy]

Okay.

[Chris]

Yep. Yeah, because saying your father drinks because you're gay. Four Coast Apparel Company. Okay. Screwed it in. Matt. Jack W.E. finley, WWE Men and Women's tag team champ, the Hardley Boys.

[Chrissy]

Nick loved it.

[Chris]

Nick. Like that one.

[Chrissy]

Get it? What is it?

[Chris]

They're trans, so they're hardly boys. Oh, wwe. Wwe? Men and women's tag team champ. The Hardley Boys.

[Chrissy]

Really good, right?

[Chris]

You think that's.

[Chrissy]

We're going to put it on the list.

[Chris]

Okay. The Hardley Boys. And you never get Nick to laugh.

[Chrissy]

Nick. That was the first I've seen a

[Chris]

full laugh that was audible. Nick's not as switched off and sociopathic as we thought.

[Joey Kamasta]

No, I'm just depressed.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Just depressed. Yeah. Okay. Well, that's why we listen to this podcast. We help people get out of depression. Yeah. Last names Maxwell. It's just what we do, cuz. Okay. William Devarney. Hyenas. Hyenas dream. Hold on. Hyenas. Dreams of immersion, of a. See victim of a bad read. But also some of. Some of these things, some of these names. Guys, it'd be better if you just space them out because it's hard to read the one word.

[Chrissy]

I don't know if they can.

[Chris]

Oh, the hunt dog. Then we got branch manager at Banco Popular. Ate some tanko chocolar, then took an Adolf Hitler on my chest. Frisbee missiles flying like crazy in Middle Earth.

[Chrissy]

Caleb Shamrock Drexler for that one.

[Chris]

Wordle Turtle. Jacob Smith. Luis Alvarado. Batman. Oh, wow. Batman's on the show. Katie Holmes. Another celebrity.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Then we got. I'm sorry, Dan, but Donna has fumes.

[Chrissy]

Big.

[Chris]

Okay. Frank Sanovich, Mitch Ledford Franklin, AKA Charlie Brown. Leroy fell off the beam ass first into a pile of hot dogs.

[Chrissy]

Put them on the list.

[Chris]

Yeah, that Dastoni. Sam Cincola. Fran Moreno. Jared Michael Lee. M. Kevin Deluca. Michael Baglieri. Rectal detective.

[Chrissy]

Rectal detective. Chicken finger. Yeah.

[Chris]

Sam Smith. Oh, the singer.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Daniel Serrano. Strictly for my EB key cards. Okay. 14. Got me.

[Chrissy]

Walked in a one.

[Chris]

Sorry about that. P. Diddy's Costco account count. Put him on the list.

[Chrissy]

Get the catapult out. Contender.

[Chris]

That's wholesale baby oil.

[Chrissy]

Wholesale baby oil.

[Chris]

Melissa Curry. DF Graped and stole so much. Should have been named Dingus Khan.

[Chrissy]

Way song. Seeing one more time.

[Chris]

Graped and stole so much. Should have been named Dingus Khan.

[Chrissy]

It's a Drexler.

[Chris]

Okay. Strong pat Tram. Iranian heat. Sinking Iranian heat seeking moisture Missile. Okay. Jay Krup. Jake Litt. Tingle for tots.

[Chrissy]

Chicken figure.

[Chris]

I mean, that's pedophile Tingle for tots.

[Chrissy]

It's a chicken figure. It's a very Asia.

[Chris]

Despite all my rage, I'm still known as Ellen Page Drexler. MA Kicked Me out because I used her card for Bluechew and Patreon.

[Chrissy]

Drexler happens. Wow. Strong list.

[Chris]

Ruben de La Cruz. Ms. Frizzle fed me LSD. Saw Chrissy D at F45. Instructor is a piece. I want to suck her feet. Okay, well, nice. Nice to see you at F45.

[Chrissy]

Is there another guy there or is it a girl? Was the instructor or girl?

[Chris]

The instructors are only women, so was

[Chrissy]

there another guy there?

[Chris]

Yeah, there's men that take it.

[Chrissy]

Oh, so the guy saw you.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Youth cycling club, call me a pedo. Youth cycling club, call me a pedal pedal file.

[Chrissy]

Pedal file, pedal file. Good pun. Good pun.

[Chris]

Drexler, Dylan. Joe. William Acevedo. Leroy's Auto Body. And Jim. We buff out the dings.

[Chrissy]

Drexler.

[Chris]

What it is.

[Chrissy]

This is a really strong list.

[Chris]

Yeah. John Garriott. Kicked out of Panetico's for bringing my own pudding. Panetico's a famous daily ridge. Tim Clemons. Christian Arellano.

[Chrissy]

Mikey no working Mikey no working is a chicken finger. His name is Mikey no working Mikey no chicken finger.

[Chris]

Yeah. Ryan Shaq Stick moved in next door. Zach Speakman. Do they know there's no banks there? Okay. Giampalo. Blistering my meat to Venatius feet. Bevalacoa.

[Chrissy]

Okay.

[Chris]

Blistering my meat to venity. Yeah. We don't disparage the family. Squeak, slip and slide. Byron Jones. Vote Sheriff. Gerrymander. Okay.

[Joey Kamasta]

Right.

[Chrissy]

Gerrymandering. Kind of.

[Chris]

Got it. Yeah. Chrissy said to name our Chinese son Mulan. We named him Wuhan.

[Chrissy]

Correct.

[Chris]

Doug.

[Chrissy]

This is one of the strongest lists.

[Chris]

Yeah. Fetus would come back. Yeah.

[Joey Kamasta]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Father Bill's protege, Gage Wagner.

[Chrissy]

I wonder why they took to Father Bill so much. So interesting.

[Chris]

It's interesting. Yeah. Yeah.

[Chrissy]

They take so much joy at you being molested, but.

[Chris]

Yeah, but I think that's what it is. It just speaks because our fans have their roofs blown off.

[Chrissy]

Yeah. They're just fully blown off roofs.

[Chris]

And they're probably identified with it because half our Patriot probably has been molested.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

I mean, the Father Bill just really.

[Chris]

It really took off big.

[Chrissy]

Really took off with the Patriot.

[Chris]

It's been going on since.

[Chrissy]

For years.

[Chris]

17. For almost a decade of Father Bill.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Chris]

We could have a Father Bill list. Yeah. Yeah.

[Chrissy]

We should have a. We could compile a Father Bill. We should do like a best of Father Bill.

[Chris]

Yeah. Oysters and Leroy's. Not all are bad, but too many are that I walked into one. It's not good. Good.

[Chrissy]

It's put that on the walked into a list though, because it's really funny.

[Chris]

That's bad funny. Preston. Mickey Velasquez, Matthew Acker. Tristan Wanderson. You heard? Okay. Maddie O. New World orphan. Two bears in Chrissy's Cave.

[Chrissy]

Drexler.

[Chris]

Amy Schumer's tongue punching. Tim Dillon's fart box. Okay. Okay. Courtney Schmidt. Known to King Austin Rec. Bilbo Swaggins. Shot my juglue inside a Cuban and made a Juban.

[Chrissy]

Got it. Good job.

[Chris]

60. Jeff Steel Pipe Gillooly.

[Chrissy]

Jeff Gillooly. Saw Smoky award for that guy.

[Chris]

Yeah. Landon bullock. Lightning Leroy, aka Usain Bolt. Okay.

[Chrissy]

Lightning Leroy.

[Chris]

Funny. Yeah, like Lightning McQueen. Like freaking finger White guy from Alabama who only dates Leroy's because they let me say the N word during sex. 14.

[Chrissy]

Drexler. Okay.

[Chris]

Nicholas Ferrari.

[Chrissy]

Wow, what a heavy Drexler.

[Chris]

Yeah. Hector. I haven't been feeling the best the last few weeks. You may want to see a doctor. Okay.

[Chrissy]

Check it out.

[Chris]

Armani, Arroyo Patty. Falafel, Frisbees, AKA World War Fumes. Okay. Norcal Lingua Monkey, Retardy Oswald, Derek Williams. Michael Iannucci. Wet wipes wherever I go.

[Chrissy]

Drexler.

[Chris]

Okay. High risk Short shorts. Kristi Gnomes Dog.

[Chrissy]

What am I missing there? She killed a dog. Oh, that's why.

[Chris]

Killer dog.

[Chrissy]

It was in the book or something. Yeah.

[Chris]

Killed a dog. Anthony d'. Angelo. Marty Ferris. The next Ayatollah here for a good time, not a long time.

[Chrissy]

Right? That's. That's a contender. Yeah, that's a contender.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

The Ayatollahs are definitely here for a good time, not a long time.

[Chris]

Yeah. Big Feet's little piece. Robert Barrow. Shooting glue while I poo. That's interesting.

[Chrissy]

Jerk it off my ticks and shit.

[Chris]

That's interesting.

[Chrissy]

That's a chicken figure, Matt.

[Chris]

A herb frozen glizzies in my ass like a turd in Vietnam. David Harris. Bernie made off with my panties. Rebecca Mariucci. Zoe Compton. Leaky Potato Monkey. Signed. Sign on. Sign on. Bonus for just hit. Sorry. Tongue straight to the back. Make me giggle with an erection. Tomondo de Owens. Dick Anderson. Elmer Fudge. Because I shoot glue. Where you poo. Interesting. Two glue poo ones. Poppy. Put the cold cuts in my pants and walk away.

[Chrissy]

Put him on the list.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Chrissy]

Very interesting. Yeah. He stole cold cuts and he wanted the guy to put them in his pants. It's a creative one.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Somali Frisbee, aka Captain Hook. Nose Ladder 14.

[Chrissy]

Walked in. But a real funny one.

[Chris]

Okay. Yeah. Phil Michael McGrath. Okay. David Luna. Uncut and proud. Make me come call that goy sauce. John Dickinson. Ben Fibs, Young Sh. And then last but not least, Babe, the shrink ray. Hit me in the penis.

[Chrissy]

Okay, that's a funny one. There's a clear winner to me.

[Chris]

Okay. Okay.

[Chrissy]

We'll give them all their due, but there's a clear winner.

[Chris]

Okay, here we go. The names who made it are Gaytona 500, aka Fume, Paul's Drag Race.

[Chrissy]

We're gonna Chicken Finger. And Drexler.

[Joey Kamasta]

You.

[Chrissy]

You got a double Chicken finger. Drexler.

[Chris]

Call me Nick's tv. When they show women's wrestling switched off.

[Chrissy]

Very funny. We're gonna Drexler it.

[Chris]

All right. Made Nick laugh.

[Chrissy]

Yeah.

[Chris]

No, this one made Nick laugh. WWE men and women's tag team champ, the Hardley Boys.

[Chrissy]

We're gonna keep that around. Cause it's very good.

[Chris]

Okay. Okay. Fell off the beam ass first into a pile of hot dogs.

[Chrissy]

Very funny. We're going to Drexler it.

[Chris]

Okay. Pete did his Costco account that for me. Okay.

[Chrissy]

Is the clear winner.

[Chris]

And then we got. The next ayatollah is here for a good time. Not a long time.

[Chrissy]

Well, actually, yeah, Keep that around.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Chrissy]

It's a three off. Yeah, those are three. Great.

[Chris]

Well, then we got Poppy. Put the cold cuts in my pants. Walk away.

[Chrissy]

That one gets a Drexler. But the. It was the funniest Drexler.

[Chris]

So the three are WWE men and women's tag team champ, the Hardley Boys, P. Diddy's Costco account. Or the next Ayatollah here for a good time. Not a long.

[Chrissy]

Well, actually, this is harder than I thought it was going to be.

[Chris]

Told you.

[Chrissy]

I thought it was a clear winner, but it was harder than I thought I was going to. And I just want to remind everybody, you're a winner if you're a Drexler.

[Chris]

Yes.

[Chrissy]

There's just a lot of people who are subscribing. So I just want you to have your head held high.

[Chris]

Right.

[Chrissy]

Your. Your head should be held high. You got a Drexler. That's really good. But unfortunately, Michael Jordan is just a guy who played in your era.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Chrissy]

Just remember that. These three guys are just a little funnier.

[Chris]

Yep. Yep. So. So what are you thinking?

[Chrissy]

The Ayatollah is just a straight punch. Funny. The Costco account is a straight punch Funny. I think we're going to Drexler the Hardly Boys.

[Chris]

Okay. It made Nick laugh, but we're going

[Chrissy]

to Drex of that. So we really are down to 2.

[Chris]

It's between P. Diddy's Costco account and the next ayatollah here for a good time, not a long time. I am leaning towards P. Diddy's Costco account only because the ayatollah ones and the Islam ones are funny, but they, they're not easier. They're a little bit more topical. P. Diddy ones are like Asians are bad drivers jokes. They have to be really good to be good. And P. Diddy's Costco account, it seems pretty good. I haven't thought really good.

[Chrissy]

Should we pick a winner or should we put this one to the fans again? We can put it to a vote here. Is there a clear winner?

[Chris]

I. I like the Diddy Costco account one.

[Chrissy]

Yeah, that's Nick. What do you call for that one too?

[Chris]

I like Diddy's Costco account. Nick likes.

[Chrissy]

So it's a clear winner.

[Chris]

So clear winner. P. Diddy's Costco account. You are the winner. You have the ppw. See your name up in lights at hyenasisback. Com. Thank you for being a part of the Patreon. The episode continues right now.