Parasite Queen | History Hyenas

Summary

History Hyenas: "Parasite Queen" | Dec 25, 2025

Hosts: Chris Distefano & Yannis Pappas
Episode Theme:
A wild ride blending raunchy comedy, animal facts, and end-of-year fan engagement. The Hyenas deep-dive into ant colonies—especially their matriarchal power structures and "parasite queens"—using these ant antics as hilarious metaphors for human behavior, relationships, and society. Plus, an epic showdown for the “Patreon Name of the Year,” crowned live with input from friends and family.

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Main Discussion Points

1. End-of-Year Vibes and Holiday Banter

(02:25 – 06:00)

• The boys riff on the repetitiveness of holiday traditions, plugging their live shows and wishing the audience happy holidays.
• Running jokes about their voices (“ruffled man voice”), sexual innuendo, and making fun of each other’s energy in the studio.
• Lampooning current events and societal fatigue—Chris: “When they take [Taiwan], not much is gonna change in my life... I’m just worried about my block in my neighborhood.” (03:32)

Notable Quote

"All right, everyone. Welcome to another episode of History Hyenas. We are here at the end of the year and we are queer. Now buckle up."
– Chris D, [02:25]

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2. Ant Colonies: Nature’s Matriarchs and Efficiency Machines

(19:59 – 41:35)

Female Power in Ant Colonies

• Yannis introduces the “parasite queen” phenomenon—rogue ant queens infiltrate other colonies, “spray” chemicals on established queens, and trick the workers into killing their true mother.
  • “There's a type of ant colony... these ants... spray a chemical on the queen ant when they want to take over, and then they make the little ant babies eat their own ma. They eat their own mother." (20:31)
• Ants as a model for extreme efficiency and purpose—each ant has a clear role; “soldier ants” are celibate females, focused on protection and labor.
• The boys draw parallels to matriarchal animals and human societies, joking that ant colonies are “another favorite animal of ours” due to their lesbian matriarchies.

Notable Quotes

"They just stick to their particular job. They don't waste any energy on anything else. And that's how they survive."
– Yannis Pappas, [23:33]

"Soldier ants, a lot of people that know the soldier ants, they're f*cking lesbians. They're like celibate lesbians."
– Yannis Pappas, [24:04]

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3. The Parasite Queen: Evolutionary Game Theory & Human Parallels

(33:41 – 41:14)

• The “parasite queen” as the ultimate interloper: infiltrates, co-opts, and overthrows established power.
  • The ant colony can be run by an outsider thanks to chemical trickery: “She just comes in and takes it over. And I think in human nature we have people like that. Who just come in and cheat their way in.” (39:34)
• Yannis draws comparisons to figures like Hitler: “He was the perfect parasite ant—came in, brainwashed everybody, took over the colony.”
• Extended, irreverent riffs about the queen ant’s attractiveness and the devotion of her colony—anthropomorphizing ant behavior for maximum laughs.

Notable Quote

"This is an Instagram thot that'll ruin your f*cking life."
– Yannis Pappas, [38:16]

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4. Applying the Ant Model to Human Society

(41:14 – 46:55)

• Deep-dive into “purpose” and peace, comparing humans’ scattered focus to ants’ clarity of role.
• Chris compares his devotion to Jesus to ant devotion to their queen: “They’re not doing podcasts and stand-up and trying to act and on TikTok. They're just serving their queen as I’m serving Jesus." (40:49)
• Hilarious complaints about family life, marriage (debating electrical outlet colors), and the feeling of being a “worker ant.”
• Insights into why humans get anxious, and how single-minded service can paradoxically bring peace.

Notable Quote

"You always find as a human, you're at the most at peace when you're in service of something specific."
– Yannis Pappas, [40:17]

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5. AI and the Future: From Ant Colonies to Cyborgs

(42:20 – 64:46)

• Speculations about the future of tech and AI: comparing robotic systems and ant colonies, the dangers of unchecked AI progress, and how society will adapt.
• Recurring joke about who should be trusted with flying cars: “They would have to figure out what the driving test would be and how intricate it would need to be for women and Chinese people. That’s what it is, because accidents happen 100%.” (44:06)
• Discussion about managing technology's role in our lives (e.g., parties that force phones into locked Yonder bags).

Notable Quote

"I think authentic will become more of a currency because it’ll just be so much harder to pull the wool over anyone's eye."
– Yannis Pappas, [64:46]

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6. Patreon Name of the Year: The Ultimate Fan Competition

(66:54 – End)

Premise:
The boys compile and judge every past Patreon "name of the week," running a rigorous and riotous elimination tournament (full of callbacks, inside jokes, and listener shoutouts). The process is collaborative and improvisational, involving guest votes from friends, family, and even their wives.

• They progressively whittle down dozens of past winners, seeking the “one that still gives a collective laugh.”
• Old favorites like “Jewish tunnel tour guide,” “The diarrhea of Anne Franks and beans,” and “Met a ladyboy and told her don’t tuck it” fall victim to intense debate and the rules of Drexler-ing (elimination).
• The final contenders:
  • "Frozen grapes in my ass, then walk around shitting like a deer."
  • "My trans cock has surprised more Italians than Mt. Vesuvius."

Choosing the Winner

• The hosts phone several people for tie-breakers—including Deebo (“I like the deer one”) [88:50], Sergio (“Frozen grapes in the ass made me laugh, and I’m also gonna try it”) [95:18], and both their wives (with Brittany putting the final nail: “The first one made me laugh. The deer made you laugh.” [102:00]).
• The eventual champion:
  "Frozen grapes in my ass, then walk around shitting like a deer."

Notable Quotes

"I literally... I got chills just now down my back because—listen to this. This is the winner of thousands of entries. Many beasts. Yes, you are the king of kings."
– Giannis Pappas, [103:00]

"You are, shall I say, the Queen Ant. Yes, you fucking are. Top of the food chain. That is, I think that's a bigger feat than my entire career."
– Giannis Pappas, [103:13]

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Highlight Reel: Memorable Moments & Timestamps

• Ant Colonies & Parasite Queens: Deep dive into ant matriarchy and the wildness of nature’s social structures (19:59 – 41:14)
• Analogies to Human Society: Jokes comparing family life, marriages, and social roles to different types of ants (41:14 – 46:55)
• Racing for the Best Patreon Name: Extended, uproarious "tournament" with audience and guest input (66:54 – end)
• Crowning the Winner: Friends/family phone-a-friend segment bringing unexpected tension and laughs (88:33 – 103:50)
• Celebratory send-off: Supportive tribute to their fans and closing out another year of chaos and comedy

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Tone & Style

• Language: Blue-collar, unfiltered, irreverent, with constant asides, meta-humor, and callbacks to running gags and character traditions
• Atmosphere: Wild, unscripted, and inclusive—bring fans directly into the show with interactive bits and listener appreciation
• Recurring Gags: Over-the-top New York accents, random tangents about bodily functions, running commentary on each other’s idiosyncrasies, and persistent callbacks to Patreon antics and “the squeaks” (producer Nick and other show regulars)

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Final Thoughts

This episode is History Hyenas at their best: gleefully blending nature facts and social satire, lampooning sacred cows, and letting their audience become part of the show’s DNA. The ant colony—nature’s perfect matriarchy—is used as a lens for everything from marriage to politics to online weirdness, culminating in a lovingly chaotic fan competition that celebrates community and absurdity in equal measure.

Don’t miss:

• The in-depth “ant colony” breakdown (19:59 – 41:14)
• The entire Patreon Name of the Year tournament (66:54 – end), a running highlight reel for die-hard fans and newcomers alike.

Quote to take with you:
"Frozen grapes in my ass, then walk around shitting like a deer. You are the winner. The PPW of the year."
— Chris D, [103:00]

Transcript

[Chris D]

When the holidays start to feel a bit repetitive, reach for a Sprite Winter Spiced Cranberry and put your twist on tradition.

[Giannis Pappas]

A bold cranberry and winter spice flavor.

[Chris D]

Fusion Sprite Winter Spice Cranberry is a refreshing way to shake things up this sipping season and only for a limited time.

[Giannis Pappas]

Sprite obey your thirst.

[Chris D]

All right, this is our last episode of the year. You. You have to listen to this entire episode because we ended it with the PPW winner of the year. The best Patreon name of the year was crowned this [e-mail] history Hyenas is the only way to be a part of this. But we told read out all the names at the end and it was amazing. And we also talked about ants.

[Giannis Pappas]

We talked about ant colonies and how crazy they are and how it's another animal that is a matriarch, which is nuts. You're going to enjoy it. This is one of our favorite episodes we've ever done. See me on the road. You can see me in San Francisco, Detroit and Calgary. Those are three places. Giannispeppascomedy.com Merry Christmas.

[Chris D]

Happy Holidays. Merry Christmas, San Francisco. Go see Honest, it doesn't even have any power right now. All the cars, all the wemo cars broke down. And I will be. New Year's Eve, Count Basie theater, Red Bank, New Jersey. Christy comedy.com for TikiWiki's. Happy Merry Christmas. Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa. Right?

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, yeah. We gotta remember the Leroy holidays.

[Chris D]

The Leroy happy just it's all happy.

[Giannis Pappas]

This a happy time of year. You wanna give us a gift? Patreon.comhistory hyenas for weekly bonus episodes. We'd love to see you over there. Cause that's what Santa wants.

[Chris D]

That's what it is now. Comment below. Do you think we picked the wrong name or did we pick the right one? We think we picked the right one.

[Giannis Pappas]

And in the immortal words of Chris DiStefano from the First Reich of Hyenas, Santa's a pe.

[Chris D]

All right everyone. Welcome to another episode of History Hyenas. We are here at the end of the year and we are queer. Now buckle up. I'm Chrissy D. Giannis is about to talk and he has a cold, so he's got that ruffled man voice. So if you have a. If your balls are full, you're gonna wanna go relieve yourself and then listen to this episode for the safety of you and your family. Cuz you might splooge.

[Giannis Pappas]

Jeremy spoken. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That just makes you automatically sexier? No.

[Chris D]

Cuz I like your voice.

[Giannis Pappas]

So you've been getting wet just listening to me.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Cuz and I like. That's why I just let you go on and on and on about a story that you've told. You have dementia. And I said. Because I just was getting a little pulling from your voice. And you just sound like the kind of woman I want. Yeah. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Because I don't acknowledge this is the end of the year. Because I go by Chinese New Year's.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

So whenever that is.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's what I'm. That's the new rear. I go with the new rear.

[Chris D]

It's what it is, the new rear. And Chinese New Year, it seems like in 2026 is just going to be the year of Taiwan. They're just going to take it.

[Giannis Pappas]

They're going to get taken, right?

[Chris D]

Yeah, I feel like they're probably going to take it. And I got to be honest with you, when they take it, not much is going to change in my life. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

I've had enough of islands. I'm had enough of hearing about islands.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't want to hear about Epstein's Island. I don't want to hear about Taiwan.

[Chris D]

Yeah. I don't care at all about anything. I'm just worried about my block in my neighborhood.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's what I'm worried.

[Chris D]

And I just urge people to do the same because you're taking in too much info on. Yeah, okay. Who cares then Let them eat. Thailand. Yeah. I don't know what you want me to say, but.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. Yeah. I should said. How are they going to tell who's who?

[Chris D]

Oh, yeah, that was an original Joe. Yeah. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

There's. They're paranoid over there. If you talk to.

[Chris D]

Not Ronny Chang, Bobby Lee.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's the wrong way. No, not Bobby Lee.

[Chris D]

It's my friend, Des Bishop.

[Giannis Pappas]

Not that Chinese guy. Ali's friend. This is brutal. We're gonna have to cut this because he's my friend. Taiwanese Ali's friend. Kind of deadpan. Talks like a black guy.

[Chris D]

Oh, Shane Wang.

[Giannis Pappas]

Shang Wang.

[Chris D]

Shang Wang. Sorry. Shang Wang. Sorry. I whited out his name.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. You whited out his name.

[Chris D]

We.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yahweh.

[Chris D]

Yeah, Sorry. No. What do they call it when you white it?

[Giannis Pappas]

Whitewash. Hang.

[Chris D]

Whitewash that.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, whitewash that. And I'm sorry.

[Chris D]

Shang.

[Giannis Pappas]

Hopefully you don't hear this.

[Chris D]

Shang's a great comic.

[Giannis Pappas]

He's a great comic and a great guy.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Friend of mine, he's one of the people I really enjoy and I like And I'm sorry, I just haven't had my coffee yet. It has nothing to do with me, like, forgetting Chinese people. If you think it did. Okay, you caught me.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

But anyway, he's Taiwanese and he was telling me that they are like, very paranoid of mainland Chinese. Like they live in constant fear.

[Chris D]

Taiwanese people.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. Like they hate China and they live in constant fear of China. That must be wild to be this, like, little island.

[Chris D]

Sure.

[Giannis Pappas]

And just. You got one big friend, right? You're. That you're hoping is going to get your back.

[Chris D]

Right. But they might just take you for the table.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. But you got this red fucking lion who just invented a drone ship. Have you seen what the Chinese are doing?

[Chris D]

No, I haven't seen that.

[Giannis Pappas]

They invented this. They came out, they beat us to this massive mothership. They call it like a mothership that just sends drones out because we're going to talk about ant colony.

[Chris D]

Whoa. Yeah, that looks cute, though.

[Giannis Pappas]

No, they. So the drones just shoot out from this mothership. It's like a fucking spider giving birth to all these spiders. It's wild. And these drones just shoot out.

[Chris D]

They call it the killer whale. The cure whale.

[Giannis Pappas]

The killer whale.

[Chris D]

And that's. And so that thing. Yeah. Unfortunately, we are just going towards Terminator and there's nothing we can do about it.

[Giannis Pappas]

There's nothing we could do about it.

[Chris D]

It's really.

[Giannis Pappas]

Just make me a cyborg. Let's speed it up. I want to be a cyborg. Put the neural link in.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Be half woman, half man. I'm ready.

[Chris D]

I'm ready to. I. Yeah. I don't know what to do anymore. Other than just as I've been saying it week after week, there's only one person that could save you. And he has two names.

[Giannis Pappas]

Go to church.

[Chris D]

Jesus Christ.

[Giannis Pappas]

You've been going to church.

[Chris D]

I've been going to church. And I've told people in my family, if you're not going to go to church and get out of my way. That's what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's what you've been saying.

[Chris D]

That's what I've been saying. And I got to be honest with you, cuz, the only person who does come to church with me is my dog, Josephine. She's the only one that will listen, right? That Siberian husky, that trans Siberian husky, she listens.

[Giannis Pappas]

Now we're doing a little segment on the show now called Checking in with Josephine.

[Chris D]

Yes.

[Giannis Pappas]

Where are we at? How's it going? What furniture do you got left?

[Chris D]

I got so what. I have what we've Been doing a good job is keeping her in one room of the house and not giving her. Not letting her explore the territory she has. All of a sudden though, we have a little bit of a regression. We had 10 days in a row with zero accidents. And then this morning she shit and pissed in the house. So I don't know what happened there.

[Giannis Pappas]

Just puppy stuff.

[Chris D]

Had a little regress, but that's okay. And, and things have been good. My daughter, my little one, squeezes her head and will accidentally kill her one day. It's just what it is because she squeezes her head too hard. But kids just want to squeeze puppies heads.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chris D]

But she's a cute, cute dog. And she licks her vagina all day.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, my dog like likes to lick his own prick all the time.

[Chris D]

Yeah, it's funny. It's just licking her vagina all day and it's just slks.

[Giannis Pappas]

Not a bad life because you can reach it very easily. Now here's the situation. If we all could, we would.

[Chris D]

We would. Who wouldn't?

[Giannis Pappas]

If I'm gonna jerk it, I'll definitely suck it.

[Chris D]

Yeah, I'll suck it. Yeah. The, the thing that I have. You tried to suck my own piece.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Oh, yeah. Well, I don't and I can't do it, so what I do.

[Giannis Pappas]

You're a tough cookie to fold.

[Chris D]

Yeah, I can't do that. And I don't have the flexibility. But I'm working on it. But I do just sometimes I like to eat my own glue.

[Giannis Pappas]

Now, do you think yoga guys like just definitely do it?

[Chris D]

I can't understand why a guy would be doing yoga other than to suck his own penis.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, look, if you put that on the flyer, I might show up for a few sesh.

[Chris D]

Don't tell me. If you're a man, it's because you want to be more flexible.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right.

[Chris D]

It's because you want to be able to suck your own pee or lick your own ass.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right. That's it.

[Chris D]

Why would a guy do yoga? Exactly. That's the only reason to do yoga. So guys who do yoga, self sucking is a real thing. Guys who do yoga who don't want to do that. I don't. I mean, this guy's got a missile.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, yeah. I mean, and talk about something to do when you're having a little anxiety.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Instead of putting the thumb in the mouth, just going down there and giving yourself a blow, you would definitely get.

[Chris D]

Because you could stick a thumb in your ass like Josh Hart.

[Giannis Pappas]

You could do that.

[Chris D]

I mean, Kid Josh.

[Giannis Pappas]

Up with that.

[Chris D]

Stick it. I mean, he's a funny kid is what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. What is up with that?

[Chris D]

They're just funny guys.

[Giannis Pappas]

Those guys. You know, it's funny is like the black guys now are different from the black guys. I think we grew up.

[Chris D]

Sure.

[Giannis Pappas]

Because they engage in a lot of, like, white boy fun.

[Chris D]

Sure.

[Giannis Pappas]

Like, you know, putting a finger in a friend's butt is definitely a white friend move.

[Chris D]

Well, you realize, too, being gay is. It's a. It's a. It's a worldwide thing, but it is most. It's big in America. Being gay is big. Huge. Huge in America because you don't. Like in China, there's just like, no out. Gay people in China. There just don't exist. Really.

[Giannis Pappas]

Is that a fact or.

[Chris D]

They exist in very, very, very small numbers. But here it's. Every race is kind. There's gay.

[Giannis Pappas]

We should know that.

[Chris D]

I mean. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, does anyone know that? Nick, have you. Do you do any research on that? Yeah. Are they out and open and here. Here it is.

[Chris D]

Let's see what happens.

[Giannis Pappas]

Sticks his finger in his butt. There it is. And you know. Yeah, listen. Maybe they're going with the sacred band of thieves kind of vibe. Maybe that's why they're such a good team. Maybe they're all banging.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's very possible.

[Chris D]

It. What it is. Yeah. And I. And they probably mess around like that all the time. And he got. He got mad, Jalen. But I don't think he got mad. I think he got mad in like a dude, like, we're on TV way. I don't. I think that they. Because here's the thing that you, you know, you don't want to happen. Is this a little prank right here? Now start. You're gonna have people in the comments that get serious and be like, that. It's sexual.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

And it's like, no, it's just guys having fun. It's just. It's just athletes having fun. You should see what they do in the shower.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. Or maybe they're fucking.

[Chris D]

That's fine.

[Giannis Pappas]

Maybe we've gotten to that point in society where it's just kind of happening a lot where that breakdown's kind of happened, like in ancient Greece and Rome. Maybe the guys coming up now are just like, yeah, you look hot, like in the shower.

[Chris D]

What do the comments say? I mean, I know people have probably spoken about this. It happened a week ago, but I do like to sometimes see the. Oh, and you got to log in. I. Forget it.

[Giannis Pappas]

I know what the comments are saying. I can. They're predictable.

[Chris D]

Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right down the color line for sure. White guys are going, ha ha ha ha ha. Yeah. And black guys are going, told ya.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Once you get into the ill. Yeah. You gotta pop that ass cherry.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

What it is. I mean, every conspiracy theory in the black community leads back to they're gonna.

[Chris D]

Poke your ass or they're gonna make you put a dress on. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

They're gonna make you put a dress on or they're gonna poke your ass. Which if that's the worst thing you do, I mean, you're not bad.

[Chris D]

Not bad. Now here's. Here's another thing that I did this weekend that was interesting is my dad did this when I was a kid. And then I did it again. The groceries came, put a little money.

[Giannis Pappas]

On Jake Paul and lost it all.

[Chris D]

I lost it all. Yeah. Yeah. And Jake Paul, you know, and it's interesting. I've sent now two texts to Jake Paul and I've gotten no response. So I think I might have pissed him off.

[Giannis Pappas]

Well, it's wild that you thought he would respond when he was about to get his jaw broken. I was busy.

[Chris D]

Well, cuz I said, I said, dude, miss you. This is on Tuesday, December 2nd. I said, dude, miss you. How are you gonna fight Anthony Joshua and not get hard in the ring? Do you have a plan for that? No response. And then I text him Saturday afternoon. I said, great fight, man. You looked awesome. Seriously. Unreal. And also, Anthony Joshua broke my jaw once too, but not with his fist. And then I put the emoji in the car like that. And then I said, enjoy all your success, babe. And he just didn't respond. Yeah, well. So it's just. I think I've pissed him off.

[Giannis Pappas]

No, I think he's a little busy. Cause he's in the hospital having major surgery and he can't. You know, when you get your jaw broken, it's highly unpleasant.

[Chris D]

Have you ever gotten your jaw broken?

[Giannis Pappas]

No. Yeah, I deserved it a few times. Yeah.

[Chris D]

I think that's the only way to get me to stop eating black and white cookies.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's just to break your jaw. Right.

[Chris D]

I think the only way to get me to stop eating black and white cookies is I have to start eating black and white people.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. Way stronger.

[Chris D]

I think I have to. Jeffrey Dahmer. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Well, let's make a note for. For Bay Ridge Boys episode where Chrissy goes on a mission to have his bro his jaw broken so he can stop eating. Sweet.

[Chris D]

Yeah, yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Just make a Note of that, because that's a good. That's a good episode. That would be very funny.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

We just go around going, please break my jaw. So he starts doing things in order to get his jaw broken.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

And nobody will break his jaw.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Yeah. And then I'll figure out a way how to maybe put black and white cookies in a smoothie.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. Or in your ass.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Take your ass cheeks and munch them down. Yeah. He's just busy because. And he's not. When you break your jaw, you know, you got. You got to go on a liquid diet for like two weeks or that sucks.

[Chris D]

A month.

[Giannis Pappas]

He can't eat.

[Chris D]

And he has grown out his beard now to the point where he is looking like a white muzzy.

[Giannis Pappas]

He is looking like one of those people who just got radical.

[Chris D]

Like a jihad john online.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Now, my boys were saying at the dinner, oh, you had a wild meal. Yeah, we had a nice meal. One of my friends brought a gun to.

[Giannis Pappas]

Let me ask you, in Dave Chappelle's latest special, he talks about FBI lighting at the club.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Was the lighting in the restaurant just a little brighter? Was that dinner under surveillance?

[Chris D]

It was under surveillance, and my boys made it a point to say out loud after at the table, which was fully open to the rest of the public, to call Dave Chappelle Special by the name Dave Chappelle intended to. Which is the Unstoppable. I said, you know, that's not the name. It's the Unstoppable Dave Chappelle. And they said, no, no, no. That's what Netflix said. But they said, if you watch the special. And they said, he actually wants to be called the Unstoppable.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. And they didn't.

[Chris D]

So that's what they were saying. Because they were saying, we respected Dave Chappelle and what his wishes are, because.

[Giannis Pappas]

That'S the name of the special. And what was the name of the restaurant you were at? I can't say.

[Chris D]

You want to get in trouble?

[Giannis Pappas]

Let's just bleep it. Cause I want to know how Italian the name sounds.

[Chris D]

Yeah, it's called.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, yeah, just bleep it. Yeah. So it might have been an establishment where you could let that fly. Well, actually, it's the title of Special. You can't accurately tell someone what you just watched.

[Chris D]

That's what they were saying. That's what my voice was saying. They're like, it's not. We are being. We are actually being less racist by doing what Dave wants us to say.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right, Right.

[Chris D]

So. So whatever but we had a. We had a good time. I ate four desserts, and it was. It was a real nice time drinking espresso martinis.

[Giannis Pappas]

Ye. And everybody at the table's got good benefits.

[Chris D]

Good benefits. Including Deebo, fdny, nypd. Deebo was filming me eat dessert after dessert, after dessert.

[Giannis Pappas]

High chair or.

[Chris D]

No, no, he didn't have a high chair, but he did. We got baked clams for the table, and Deebo ate 19 out of the 20 clamps.

[Giannis Pappas]

I like that.

[Chris D]

So we said, what the hell's going on with you?

[Giannis Pappas]

Well, he wanted to match the amount of clamps he ate to the amount of cold beer he drank.

[Chris D]

Yeah, yeah. No.

[Giannis Pappas]

Did the kid have 19 beers?

[Chris D]

Well, he would. No, he was. Everybody was told they have to drink espress martinis, but that. Don't forget, that's a big glass. So that really was big for Debo.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, it was like. It was like one of those spring break joints. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chris D]

Two hands like that.

[Giannis Pappas]

Now, this is just an annual dinner that you.

[Chris D]

This is a yearly dinner, which we were. I invited you to. But you had had the shows. Yeah. But then you wound up not doing the shows.

[Giannis Pappas]

Celebrity Live being the only theater at the table.

[Chris D]

Yeah. I mean, I do get called that word a lot, but that's what Debo actually said. He goes, Giannis needs to come next time. He goes. And he needs to put the wig on. That's what they. That was an exact quote. Yeah. So they want you to put the wig on. Would you do it?

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, I'll do it.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Why not?

[Giannis Pappas]

I'll do it.

[Chris D]

It was fun. It was fun. I got kids love Maurice. Yeah. I got invited to multiple FDNY Christmas parties and kids engagement parties in Bay Ridge, and I got invited to about six different parties.

[Giannis Pappas]

Now, what do they feel like when we do Ladder 14? Do they like it, or do they think we're making fun of them? Do they hate it?

[Chris D]

I think that they. I think that they ultimately like it because we say the things that they want to hear.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's what they really want to hear.

[Chris D]

Yeah, I think. Yeah, that's.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. They're going, how the fuck does he get it so accurate. I mean, and for a kid who does skits, how do they know what they're doing?

[Chris D]

Well, what's interesting is, you know, my friends are all, you know, fdny, nypd, elevator mechanics. But the topic of the conversation for about two hours was Elon Omar's Medicaid Somalian fraud. So I said, I didn't realize that, that is what you guys were really focused on, is about Elon Omar and this fricking Medicaid fraud from the Somalis.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yo, cuz, what have your friends been doing for news since Charlie Kirk's passion? They haven't been able to tune into the American network yet. My mother in law watches Big Big.

[Chris D]

Yeah. So they, you know, I don't know, they just talked a lot about Elon Omar.

[Giannis Pappas]

Elon Omar is in an interesting situation.

[Chris D]

Do you think that she took money and herself and pocketed some money?

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't know. But as we did cover, I do know that, that a large percentage of the people that did it happened to be Somali. Yeah, they were really running a little thing. I think we're going to.

[Chris D]

And she also happens to be Somali.

[Giannis Pappas]

She happens to also be. Smolly, what it is. She also happens to be in a position of power in that particular district.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

So I think right now they just raided Tim Walls office.

[Chris D]

It's what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

So if you're on one side you're going, this is federal overreach on another side and racist and fascist. And then the other side you're going, finally somebody's doing something about all this fraud that I would guess. I think the Somalis are kind of like. They're kind of like the Louis CK of Medicaid fraud.

[Chris D]

Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

They're making an example of the Somalis. But I would guarantee you that if you go to state by state, it's probably gonna be pretty hefty.

[Chris D]

Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

Because the thing about socialist programs, and I know this from doing social work, is people just take advantage of them. Because you're dealing with people whose job is to be empathetic.

[Chris D]

Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

You don't wanna be discerning. It's seen as cruel. If you're asking questions like, so what's your real job? They go like, I'm already a victim and you're asking me questions. You know, so it's like people just hand over the money. I know I did.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'd get a call and I'd go, how were you by 9 11? And they would go, well, I got sad for 10 minutes and I go, here's some Pathmark food vouchers and let me get your rent paid for it.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Because I don't want to be the guy that questions the victim.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

So it's just built in. It's kind of baked in. It's a flaw. Just like every system has a flaw. Socialism has mostly positives.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Just like capitalism is mostly positives. Yeah, but they're baked in flaws.

[Chris D]

Now, do you think Somalian people who have pools, do they have a diving board? Does it look too much?

[Giannis Pappas]

If you're Somali, you just say, that's catnip.

[Chris D]

It's just catnip.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, catnip. Because they love piracy.

[Chris D]

They love piracy. But do they have diving boards in the pools or does it look like a plank and they don't want to go down it?

[Giannis Pappas]

That is a very good question.

[Chris D]

Have you thought about that? Do they raise flags outside their house like it's on a ship mast? What do they do?

[Giannis Pappas]

That's a very good question. Yeah, I mean, I don't understand why their flags in his skull with two crossbones.

[Chris D]

Yeah, I don't get it.

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't understand because I say, when.

[Chris D]

I go to the Somali neighborhoods in Minnesota, I say that a lot of you guys have two legs. I didn't think pirates had two legs. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

And I'm saying, how come all these same guys have different names?

[Chris D]

It's just what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

Now why is the same guy everywhere? Cuz they just happen to look very much alike.

[Chris D]

It's just what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

And I know Yasid is listening to this. He's a friend of mine. Yasid, I gotta do my job.

[Chris D]

It's just what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Now I got a text. I got a text out of nowhere from giannis Random Yesterday, 11:45am you know, just go and do my Sunday chores. Going to, going to church, trying to get bagels for the kids, trying to get Christmas together. And he goes, he goes out of nowhere. Remember, evolution favors energy efficiency. So I said, do you mean that I should convert my house into geo, geothermal energy and change oil? And then he goes, it's what it is. I said, okay, what's going on here? He goes, I've been down a rabbit hole of ant colonies because it's wild and fascinating. You realize survival and evolution is not about working harder, it's about not wasting energy. Peace isn't laziness. It's returning energy to its rightful owner. Working harder can kill you if someone is working smarter or more accurately, more efficient, more efficiently. Then he said, want your minds blown or do you feel like today? And then he said, we're gonna start reading about ant colonies. We're doing it together. I said, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. I said, I gotta read about ants. And then you sent me an article about ants. And it's absolutely wild to know that all you gotta know about ants is that there's a type of ant colony. Okay. And the Italians in Bensonhurst in Staten island who are loyal listeners to the podcast, we really appreciate your love and support. You're going to want to put earmuffs in right now, because what these ants do is they spray a chemical on the queen ant when they want to take over, and then they make the little ant babies eat their own ma. They eat their own mother.

[Giannis Pappas]

They eat their mother. Something that would never happen in an Italian household.

[Chris D]

No. You would never attack your ma. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Italians go, whoa, I'm turning you soft.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Just like you said. I can't listen to this mattress.

[Chris D]

I can't. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Because ant colonies are wild. There's 14,000 that we know of different types of ant species, but only about a dozen of them are kind of dangerous to humans and very few deaths.

[Chris D]

Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

The bulldog ant down under in Australia is one that takes a couple of human lives, maybe three in the last 10 years, but they could really hurt you. Their bites come in a little fucking ouch. Ants are why y'. All. First of all, Australia, everything could kill you down under.

[Chris D]

Everything could kill you.

[Giannis Pappas]

Even the rocks are alive. You step on it, it'll fucking kill you. But ants are a wild thing to contemplate because, first of all, there's a quatrillion of them.

[Chris D]

Right. And I wanna make it very, very clear right now, we're talking about ants. We're not talking about Chinese. You're not doing slur din. We're talking about little ants.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're actually talking the minority. This is a unique situation on History Hyenas where we're actually talking about the thing we're referencing. Yes. We're not using it as another term.

[Chris D]

We're not doing a slur here. This is about ants. The bug, the ants.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. We're not talking about who. There's a lot of them. So.

[Chris D]

Yeah. So don't get it twisted.

[Giannis Pappas]

Although if you wanna. It technically wouldn't be wrong. I mean, it wouldn't be a great analogy.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, they are a lot of them and they. A lot of them are underground.

[Chris D]

Yeah. But when we're not. We're not saying that.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're not saying.

[Chris D]

We're not saying that.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're talking about actual ants. And plus, these ones are red, so we weren't talking about. They're not the color you would. You know what I mean?

[Chris D]

Exactly. Red ants.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. We're not talking about birds. Right, Right. We're not talking about anything that looks like a banana color. Yeah. It's more of A Native American look.

[Chris D]

Yep.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, it's more of a Nick look.

[Chris D]

It's what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's more of a red ant. There's red ants.

[Chris D]

Yes. Yeah, Yep.

[Giannis Pappas]

So there's American ants.

[Chris D]

I got you. I just wanted to make it clear to the audience that they weren't taking anything out of context. We're talking about ants.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, we're talking about ants. Because some of our fans are a little. They're unshackleable.

[Chris D]

Sure.

[Giannis Pappas]

And we want you to know that we've seen on the Patreon what we call walked into ones. And we don't support the new nickname that you have for Nick. We don't like it.

[Chris D]

We don't like that.

[Giannis Pappas]

Don't like that.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Okay. As far as we know, it is Nick the Stick. Yes. Nick the Stick. Or theater kid Nick.

[Chris D]

Yes.

[Giannis Pappas]

Or something like that. We're not going with the one that rhymes. That a few of you have made your favorite. We don't agree with that and we don't like it.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Thankfully, Nick can't afford the Patreon. Yeah, that's good. But this little band, we don't want that on in our community. Yeah, yeah. We had to say that for legal reasons in case Nick sues us in the future. It's what it is. We didn't create it. We don't condone it.

[Chris D]

It's what it is. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

So ants, first of all, God, can they make babies. This queen, cuz, I mean, Puerto Rican's got nothing on ants.

[Chris D]

They got nothing on ants.

[Giannis Pappas]

Ants could make like a million babies.

[Chris D]

It's what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

And they're wild. It's wild because they. And that's why I was talking about energy efficiency, because they're so amazing. But they just stick to their particular job. They don't waste. Waste any energy on anything else. And that's how they survive in harsh conditions. Like all life species, they get really.

[Chris D]

Good at one thing.

[Giannis Pappas]

One thing.

[Chris D]

They're not trying to do a million things.

[Giannis Pappas]

Trying to do a million things. They don't waste energy. It could be life or death for them. So the soldier ants, a lot of people that know the soldier ants, they're fucking lesbians.

[Chris D]

Wow.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. They don't. But they're. They're. They're like celibate lesbians.

[Chris D]

Interesting.

[Giannis Pappas]

They're like lesbians nobody wants to fuck. They're all female. The soldiers are all female. So we located another species that is a fucking matriarchy.

[Chris D]

Wow.

[Giannis Pappas]

So it's. Right away, you know, it's gonna become Another favorite animal of ours.

[Chris D]

100%.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. So you got the queen and then all the soldier ants are chicks. Yeah.

[Chris D]

So you're telling me it's matriarchy and they're gay. We're in.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're in. And these ants, they're female, technically, but they got no fucking pusses, so they look like Ken and Barbie dolls.

[Chris D]

So then how do they get banged out?

[Giannis Pappas]

They don't get banged out. They just fucking work for the queen and then they die like slaves.

[Chris D]

Sucks. I couldn't think of a life not getting banged out.

[Giannis Pappas]

Cause I think it may be the only solution for your piece is take your fucking to make you look like a Ken doll.

[Chris D]

It' it is. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, talk. That's like being in the Pro. They're all in the program on steroids.

[Chris D]

Answering the program. Yeah. I mean, and up close. Oh, yeah. You know what we're going to tell you all about? Answer this commercial break right after this from Quints or whatever other bullshit company sponsoring us. Cause you might think you have a solid handle on your budget, but you don't. You know what you need? Rocket Money. Ooh, yes, Rocket Money. Because your spreadsheet says you should have an extra thousand dollars left over each month. But where the hell is it? Rocket Money's going to find it.

[Giannis Pappas]

I use Rocket Money. Me too. Be honest with you. I just use it. It tells you when subscriptions have gone up. It cancels subscriptions that you didn't know you were still paying for. Let's say you sign up for the free subscription because you wanted to just juice the system, and then they started automatically charging you. Guess what? Rocket Money will remind you and go, oh, cancel this.

[Chris D]

Yep. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. Rocket Money has saved users $2.5 billion, including over 880 million in canceled subscriptions alone. Their 10 million members save up to $740 a year when they use all of the app's premium features.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, here's the good part, too. They'll even try to negotiate your bills to be lower. The app automatically scans your bills to find opportunities to save and then goes to work to get you better deals. They'll even talk to customer service so you don't have to. I mean, the investment in Rocket Money is worth it for what you're going to save. If you're the type of person who's a little forgetful and needs a little Help organizing. It's what it is.

[Chris D]

Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com hyenas today. That's RocketMoney.com H Y E N A S.com RocketMoney.com hyenas cuz you know me, I just got a Siberian husky puppy. Her name's Josephine. And you know what's the first thing I did? Got a little pet insurance from the aspca.

[Giannis Pappas]

You need to get, you need to have pet insurance if you have a dog. Especially if you got a young dog or an old dog.

[Chris D]

Especially if you have a dog in Flushing.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, if you got a dog and Flushing, you really want to get, you want to get some life insurance on that thing.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

So but for, for your health concerns for your pet pets or family, obviously you just got to check out ASPCA Health Pet Health Insurance program. They will find you a plan. That's what they do. All you got to do is enroll in ASPA pet insurance. Just enroll in a pet health insurance plan and you could get a 25Amazon, a $25Amazon gift card. It's a little treat you while you're waiting to do something great for your pet.

[Chris D]

Listen guys, it's been around for 20 years and it's covered over 1 million pets. Okay? That's a lot of pets. Now here's the thing, okay? Eligibility, eligibility, eligibility.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's a tough one.

[Chris D]

Apply. Yeah, so you gotta visit aspcapetinsurance.com AmazonTerms for more info. That's aspcapetinsurance.Com Hyenas to explore coverage, visit aspcapetinsurance dot com now. You know with ASPCA, I gotta read something verbatim.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Okay. This is a paid advertisement. Insurance is underwritten by either independent American Insurance Company or United States Fire Insurance Company and produced by PTZ Insurance Agency Ltd. The ASPCA is not an insurer and is not engaged in the business of insurance ants. When you look they are squeaks. But when you do like a really close up, they are disgusting looking.

[Giannis Pappas]

They're disgusting looking. And their strength, even the smallest ones, like the carpenter ants, their strength. If you know, you know they say pound for pound, Mayweather is like the strongest fighter even though he's a squeak. Yeah. Pound for pound ants probably could be the strongest living thing on the animal.

[Chris D]

Really?

[Giannis Pappas]

Dude, they're like firefighters in New York. They could carry their body weight plus like a hundred.

[Chris D]

They're big guys.

[Giannis Pappas]

So these guys would do good in Ladder 14.

[Chris D]

So they. So, because. So. So they. Oh, I see what you're saying. If you, like, they'd be stronger than, like, chimpanzees and everything.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. I mean, not even close.

[Chris D]

Wow.

[Giannis Pappas]

Like, if we were down, if we were their size, we'd be in big, big troub trouble.

[Chris D]

Big trouble. I think there's a stat. If you put all the ants, or it might just be insects in general. If you put all the insects on a scale and all the humans on a scale, the insects will weigh more.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Than humans. That means there's a lot of insects. I mean, there's ants on the floor right now that we can't even see. Right. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, have you ever put, like, a little piece of peanut butter in your butt and let them just walk. Walk up there?

[Chris D]

It tickles.

[Giannis Pappas]

It feels nice.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

They think it's a colony and they bury in there.

[Chris D]

Bury in there? Yes.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Yeah. I mean, I don't. I gotta be honest with you. I don't mind ants. I don't even mind roaches. I don't care. It's mice and rats. I don't like.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. Well, you know, here's the thing about the Northeast, and I'm just sorry to all the Austin comics, I'm sorry to LA comics, I'm sorry to whatever your situation is that you're running from home, from. If you're from New York, but the Northeast is just kind of the best place to live.

[Chris D]

Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

First of all, just like you see all these weather patterns in other places, they look a little suspicious, they look a little bad. We don't deal with that as much. We're having some milder winters, of course, but we really only have to worry about one thing that can hurt you, and that's ticks. But when you go to, like, Texas or the Southwest, or you go to California, where you're talking rattlesnakes, you're talking tarantulas, you're talking brown recluses, black widows.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

You know, you go to Australia, you know, you go to the desert, you're talking Muslims can hurt you. You know, they're just too many.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

You know, it's like, you go to South America, they got ants that. Red fire ants. We just got, like these little squeak ants. They don't do nothing. They don't do anything in your kitchen to eat crumbs.

[Chris D]

That's all they do.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. The most dangerous thing to us in Northeast, and that's why the Northeast is the best place to live. The thing, the animal that Kills the most humans. You know what it is?

[Chris D]

Venezuelans Ladder 14.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's a good guess. Yeah, I mean, the kid took a guess.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

You can't.

[Chris D]

You can't.

[Giannis Pappas]

You can't blame a guy for taking a stab.

[Chris D]

Yeah. And what is it?

[Giannis Pappas]

It's. What is it? It's actually a deer. It's actually deer cars hitting deer.

[Chris D]

That's the.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's the animal that causes the most death. We don't got to about worry, worry. Brown black bears are pretty. Try to stay away from humans. We don't have any wolves anymore. No gray wolves. Coyotes generally don't want any static. And so it's. It's. Number one is deer hitting your car and number two's ticks. But ticks don't kill you.

[Chris D]

They just.

[Giannis Pappas]

Your life.

[Chris D]

They. Your life. I didn't realize that. That we don't have any more gray wolves in the northeast. Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

We got nothing when you go to the southeast. I mean, dude, you think they got cougars? One of them killed Joe Rogan's dog.

[Chris D]

Really? Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Mountain lion. They got mountain lion. Mountain lions are huge. They got mountain lion. When did that.

[Chris D]

His dog. Did he always post?

[Giannis Pappas]

No, Marshall's. Okay. Yeah, I think it was like a little dog predecessor. No, it was a regular sized dog.

[Chris D]

I mean, cougars will just kill it.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, well, we have up here we got the. What do you call them? Not the cougars, but we got the. My brain's not working. We have a cat up here that can be vicious and kill your dog.

[Chris D]

Bob can bobcat.

[Giannis Pappas]

You have bobcats up here, but they rarely do. Yeah, they avoid humans. And the dog could win, especially if there's two dogs. But if you see a mountain lion, I mean, you're gonna need like three, four dogs.

[Chris D]

Dude, I didn't know. I'm still watching this Revolutionary war documentary. That was a big thing. When soldiers would desert in certain parts of the northeast and go through the woods by themselves. They would get eaten by wolves a lot.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

They would get killed by wolves. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Think about it.

[Chris D]

Animal deaths was a part of Revolutionary War death. Yeah. You would get eaten by an animal in the middle of the woods.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's crazy to think about because back then they were just flourishing. They were. They were another predator on the planet.

[Chris D]

They were everywhere. They would. And when. When, when you would go foraging, the British or the Americans, you know, relieved alliance food, they would have to eat the. The desperate winters. If there were no deer, they would just eat the wolves.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, yeah. It's. It's crazy to think about so we don't have to worry about all this stuff because there are a few, couple dangerous species of ant. Like the red ant ants. If they get a hold of you.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Then they're just gonna climb all over you.

[Chris D]

It's just what it is. And they usually get people in when they're sleeping.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, they just climb on you. They'll get. They climb on like dying animals or weak animals. They're just overwhelming. They just. Oh, they just. They really know how to like crash the border.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean you should overwhelm you with.

[Chris D]

They overwhelm you.

[Giannis Pappas]

Overwhelm you with numbers.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

And the thing about red ants is they bite and they hold on. So you can't even jump in the water. Water, they'll still stay on you.

[Chris D]

So once you start to get hit with red ants, you can't get them off you.

[Giannis Pappas]

No, you gotta, you gotta really pat them off. Or you gotta put dish soap all over you. So they slide off.

[Chris D]

Really.

[Giannis Pappas]

But there's another type of animal. I think it's a bullet ant that'll also try to overwhelm you. And you could jump in the water and they'll fall off.

[Chris D]

Got it.

[Giannis Pappas]

But with the red ants, you just kind of cooked you just now.

[Chris D]

What made you so obsessed with ants? How did, how did you find the ant literature?

[Giannis Pappas]

Well, yeah, I spend my days at my nights when my daughter goes to sleep.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Something will catch my attention. And then I just go down a rabbit hole based on curiosity.

[Chris D]

It's just what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

So I saw a video about the parasite queen.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

And I was like, this is one of the wildest things I've ever seen. And that's what I passed on to you guys.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

That took me down the rabbit hole of ants. And we're gonna tell you about the parasite queen right now. Cause it's fucking wild. So they're wild to begin with because the males fly and their only job is to fuck. They get in the air and they're just looking for puss. It's just what it is all they do. And then they die.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

And here's the thing, cuz.

[Chris D]

I am ant man. Yeah. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

You're fucking ant man. Yeah. Yeah.

[Chris D]

Paul Rudd.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. And so these fucking. So it's. They're weird. They're just a weird living thing. Because the women are born as soldiers, like basically workers with no genitalia. Their whole purpose is to serve and protect the queen like good British people.

[Chris D]

So only the queen has a puss.

[Giannis Pappas]

The. Only the queen has a fucking puss.

[Chris D]

Because. Because if you're saying the ants are flying around, the male ants flying around to have sex, if none of the other ants have pusses, what do they do?

[Giannis Pappas]

They try to fuck the queen. They're all trying to fuck the queen.

[Chris D]

But different queens are the one queen. No.

[Giannis Pappas]

Every reproduction cycle has like hundreds of thousands of queens. Most of them don't make it 1 to 3% or. And usually it ends up being one queen survives. The rest of them get eaten by other shit. You know, they. In the air, the birds are eating them, so. And then the queen. Because all the queens take flight, right? So they grow wings to fuck.

[Chris D]

Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

And then the dudes grow wings to meet them in the air and they fuck in the sky. Cuz they joined the mile high club.

[Chris D]

Cause it's like Avatar.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. They fuck in the sky. Which I do.

[Chris D]

You know that I mean, but to the sky, to them. Is that like not. Is that like by our shoes or do they go up way high?

[Giannis Pappas]

No, I think it's more like. Yeah, I think it's by your shoes. Yeah, yeah. I think it's like a little person, you know, having a party in a shoebox.

[Chris D]

Yeah, it's just.

[Giannis Pappas]

What it could be a club.

[Chris D]

Yeah, yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

So the male ants will fly in the sky. Okay. Get picked off. Tons of them get picked off, eaten by birds and other shit.

[Chris D]

Sure.

[Giannis Pappas]

And then the queens take this guy and two lucky. Romeo and Juliet's fine. And they. I just love that they fudge while they're flying. Yeah, I mean they just fudge while they're flying. And then the queen falls back to her colony. She chews her wings off because she's like, I don't need those anymore. And then she just gives birth to all these different. This is the thing, all these different larvae and shit. But they're different types ants. So she'll give birth to some queens. She'll give birth to some, to some what they call drones.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

Because the males are called drones.

[Chris D]

What it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

And then give bunch to like millions or hundreds of thousands of. Of genderless women.

[Chris D]

It's.

[Giannis Pappas]

But they're women.

[Chris D]

So how, how long is the gestation period?

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't know. Yeah, don't know. I'm no zoologist, but I don't know. I think it's months. And then they have to protect the colony, so they have to protect the colony against other rival ant colonies.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

And then it's just straight empire building and warfare. And then you got these fucking. Evolution has these parasite. So every. Every. These These queen ants give birth to all this. A variety of different types of ants, okay. And one of them, occ is this fucking parasite queen. Wow. Now this is like the couch potato. Kind of like the troll insect. Lazy, just looking to steal. Right. You know, it's kind of like the smiley queen.

[Chris D]

It's what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

She can aboard somebody else's ship and take over. Right. So the parasite queen will come in to another colony, right. And ants recognize each other by scent. They can smell, which is wild. Cause they got tiny little noses. Yeah, but everything's by scent. They're like blind. They don't know what's going on. So you could trick them just by smelling like something else. Yeah. So what she'll try to do is rub against some of the other ants before they attack her. Usually they'll get killed.

[Chris D]

Yeah, usually the.

[Giannis Pappas]

The soldier ants, the worker ants will identify the threat and beat the shit out of her and eat her up, rip her arms apart. Yeah. But occasionally one of these fucking parasite queens will come into the common successfully rub against these other fucking ants, get the smell on them, right. And just go undetected through the colony just like that, you know, Just undetected, go right to the queen and then fucking vomit on her and throw like a spray on her that makes the soldier ants think that their mother is actually the invader and that she is the mother. She's a real gold digging fucking whore.

[Chris D]

Damn.

[Giannis Pappas]

This is an Instagram thought that'll ruin your fucking life.

[Chris D]

Life. Yeah, yeah, it's like that. Have you heard that new song, Hands Off Gabriella?

[Giannis Pappas]

No.

[Chris D]

Have you heard that song?

[Giannis Pappas]

No.

[Chris D]

Hands Off Gabby.

[Giannis Pappas]

My daughter doesn't have a playlist yet.

[Chris D]

She doesn't. Okay. Yeah, it's just, it's just basically this. Hold on. Yeah, because it's just, it's just one of those things where you realize too that even in the human kingdom there are just women like that.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

That just want to take your man. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

And that's what I was thinking about parallels. When you think about Hitler, for example. Hitler was the like perfect parallel. He was the perfect parasite amp. He came in, took over the military.

[Chris D]

Careful the way you talk about Germans, Ladder 14.

[Giannis Pappas]

But he took, you see a parallel, right? He came in like a parasite ant brainwashed everybody, which is sort of like analogous to the hitting everyone with the spray and then like had everyone working for them. Because once. Cause then the soldier ants attack their mother, kill their mother, and start treating the parasite ant queen that killed their mother as their mother. And she just takes over the colony and then she goes and fucks a dude and just takes over. Yeah. Without any of the work. So she didn't build the colony, she didn't defend the colony. She just comes in and takes it over. And I think in human nature we have people like that. Yeah. Who just come in and cheat their way in.

[Chris D]

They cheat their way in or they always want to take what you have. One of them is named Puff Daddy.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's right.

[Chris D]

They always want to take somebody else's girl. So in a way he was just, you know, he was the.

[Giannis Pappas]

What was the parasite queen.

[Chris D]

He was the parasite queen. Queen in a way. Because he just wants to get his hands on everybody else's things. Now ants are also fascinating because they have that strength and they build. They know how to build and they know how to use their energy efficiently.

[Giannis Pappas]

Cause they're the Mexicans of insects. They can build you anything, man. Sometimes they will build a bridge in a river to let the queen cross.

[Chris D]

So everything is for the queen. They're not doing every nothing thing is. So in other words, they're not, they're not self motivated by. By furthering themselves. They work for the queen.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right. And that's what I found so fascinating about them because you always find as a human, you're at the most at peace when you're in service of something specific. You know, when you widen your. When you widen your range. Right. Like you're almost like wasting a lot of energy.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

But like the thing I thought about ants is like when you look at the amazing things they get done.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's because they're like singularly focused. I mean, these things are like robo.

[Chris D]

They don't worry. They're not, they're not doing podcasts and stand up and trying to act and on TikTok.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right.

[Chris D]

They're just serving their queen as I'm serving Jesus.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. And that's just their singular focus.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

So they'll do anything. Like if the queen needs to cross the water bridge, they'll build an ant bridge and a bunch of them will just sacrifice themselves what it is. And the queen will just walk across the bodies of other ants.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

And a lot of them will perish. But it's all. Their whole focus is about propagation, ensuring the survival of the colony and making. Ensuring that we go forward.

[Chris D]

Now, do you think that the queen ant, how long does she live?

[Giannis Pappas]

She just must have some really sweet puss.

[Chris D]

That's what I was thinking.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's all I'm saying.

[Chris D]

That's what I Was thinking. I was actually trying to think about getting on Instagram to DM this aunt.

[Giannis Pappas]

I think this aunt really got. I mean, it must smell like honeydew.

[Chris D]

I mean, it must be unbelievable.

[Giannis Pappas]

It must be tight.

[Chris D]

I would love to ask one of these soldier aunts, like, does she have fumade? Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

What's going on?

[Chris D]

The answer's gotta be no, I think.

[Giannis Pappas]

Absolutely no, Fumara.

[Chris D]

I mean, you're making your body a bridge for this girl. Yeah. What's up with her?

[Giannis Pappas]

What. I mean, what kind of push will.

[Chris D]

She go with me? Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, with this fucking. Can I call and have a go with me?

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. I mean, she must have such an unbelievable puss.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's hard to imagine what.

[Chris D]

Maybe we can get Debo down there and start talking and see what's going on.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's the only way.

[Chris D]

The only way is you gotta send the squeak in.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, we gotta get the squeak in. That's the only way if you want to infiltrate. That's why it's always good to have a squeak on your team.

[Chris D]

It's what it is. Now we. At some point, maybe this episode or another One, we should FaceTime deebo and just catch up with him. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Oh, but you also got another squeak.

[Chris D]

In your pocket, Steve Cicconi rice, a Roni.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. You got Teeny Stevie.

[Chris D]

Teeny Steve will do it. And Teeny Stevie comes with a camera.

[Giannis Pappas]

He comes with a camera so he can go in there, really infiltrate and know what's going on.

[Chris D]

Yeah, it's just what it is. Yeah. When you sent. When you sent me that AI nanotechnology, I think it was like a little camera inside someone's esophagus or. I thought that was Steve the squeak. And I text him, I said, you're supposed to be on my show.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. I mean, they're creating these nano robots now that can just go into your arteries and, like, clear it out.

[Chris D]

So that's. That's good science. You know what? Something I was reading about the other day with AI, it was saying there's a lot of things that science can do right now that they won't do, because it could potentially. Even if it's a 1% or less chance, they won't do it because it could potentially cause catastrophic cataclysmic events. For example, they already. Science has already gone to the point where they believe they can change the climate. They just can. However, they don't know, if they start experimenting with this, what it will actually do. Will it cause irreversible weather patterns that will wipe out and kill millions of people. So science doesn't do it. I. They have these same risks of, oh, there's over a 1% chance that it can really damage society, but the people are still going forward and doing it. So this is why you have a lot of AI scientists saying, you're not applying our basic rules to this.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right.

[Chris D]

We have so many other things, things that absolutely. We have the. They can make another human right now if they wanted to. But they know that it could have potential catastrophic events. But AI, they're just allowing to happen. So it's very interesting as to why.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's a great point. That's a lot of. That's a truth that I think. Yeah, that's a great point. That is true.

[Chris D]

They can clone, they can do all.

[Giannis Pappas]

That, can do all that stuff. But they wonder about.

[Chris D]

They also have flying cars. They can do flying cars, but they don't. They can't keep it safe right now. And they know that a lot of people would die.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

So they won't do it, but they can do it. If you. You want. If Elon Musk said to himself, I Elon Musk, I'm just making one flying car. It can happen in an hour.

[Giannis Pappas]

Well, they would have to figure out what the driving test would be and how intricate it would need to be for women and Chinese people. That's what it is, because accidents happen 100%.

[Chris D]

You can't have a woman flying in the car.

[Giannis Pappas]

Indian guys in Canada driving trucks. You just can't.

[Chris D]

That's what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. Unfortunately, you got to figure out what this message may be. Shocking to many millennials. If you are one, you might want to sit.

[Chris D]

Sit down.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right now, loads of people are searching the following on Depop. Low rise.

[Chris D]

Jeans, halter top, velour, tracksuit, hookah shell, necklace, disc, belt.

[Giannis Pappas]

You likely place these in the dark of your closet in 2004, never to be seen again. But if you can find it in.

[Chris D]

Yourself to dust them off, there are.

[Giannis Pappas]

A lot of people who will give.

[Chris D]

You money for them. Sell on Depop, where taste recognizes taste. Close your eyes, exhale.

[Giannis Pappas]

Feel your body relax, and let go of whatever you're carrying today. Well, I'm letting go of the worry that I wouldn't get my new contacts.

[Chris D]

In time for this class.

[Giannis Pappas]

I got them delivered free from 1-800-contacts.

[Chris D]

Oh, my gosh, they're so fast.

[Giannis Pappas]

And breathe. Oh, sorry.

[Chris D]

I almost couldn't breathe when I saw.

[Giannis Pappas]

The discount they gave me on my first order. Oh, sorry.

[Chris D]

Namaste.

[Giannis Pappas]

Visit 1-800-contacts.com today to save on your first order.

[Chris D]

1-800-Contact.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's going to be.

[Chris D]

So that's what it is. But it's interesting with AI because I mean, everything you're listening to now with the AI is the negatives, but I like to hear some of the positive where, you know.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, it's.

[Chris D]

You could get a Cameron, my ass. You can clean out the plaque. You can clean out a couple of polyps, couple of warts.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

You know what I mean?

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

You get my piece, clean that out.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. You can maybe give me a haircut. You could do a lot of different things. And the only thing that is standing in the way of that is this arms race. Yeah. That's why they're moving forward because they don't want the enemies to have it first. Right. But then everyone's in this arms race.

[Chris D]

But so then somebody eventually though is going to get the power and someone's going to win. And if it's not us, you're just got a big problem on your hands. Because the chances of, even if we had the power, the chances of humans doing the right thing with it is very low.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right. The only thing you can hope for is a detente based on mutually assured destruction.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Similar or akin to nuclear weapons. Everyone. Oh, we got it. You got it. Let's not fuck around.

[Chris D]

Well, the AI, they were saying the AI. AI also has the capacity, if they do truly make it autonomous, it could have this reverse effect where even if they put it in, even if they put it out there to help humans, it could. The first thing it could do is disable all the nuclear weapons. It was truly autonomous. And then that would cause more war.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. Yeah. Which is what they claim alien technology has been doing is turning on and turning off the nukes.

[Chris D]

That's what they say.

[Giannis Pappas]

Could just be. I, I mean, I don't know.

[Chris D]

I don't know. And I do think, you know, especially those of us that have children. I. We've said it here in the pod. I mean, I just think our kids should all be either plumbers or little carpenter ants because it's not going to. I don't know, all these jobs are just going to be obsolete in 20 years.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. I mean, when you have kids, it just kind of breaks your brain.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Because you love something so much, you just want them to be okay.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

And you hear all this stuff in the news. That's why I can't really relate to anyone who doesn't have children.

[Chris D]

Yeah. And I'm not coming down on anyone who doesn't. But it's like, I got not yelled at today, but I got emailed today to go do something. Something basically co host a. A morning New York. You know, like, morning show. Not like a new show, like, oh, looking for co anchors. And I said, oh, I can't do it, because the times they want me to do it. It's like, then I can't take my kids to school. And because there's. People are just so embedded in the entertainment issue, they're like, just miss one day. And I'm like, no, I don't want to actually just miss one day.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

So I could just sit on your show. I'd rather just take my kids to school.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. I got an audition that was supposed to do this weekend, and it films in Hawaii. So right away I was like, I don't do them. I'm not gonna do this.

[Chris D]

For me, I've made it clear if it doesn film in New York, I'm just. I'm out.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. I mean, I'm not doing that.

[Chris D]

No. I don't care.

[Giannis Pappas]

Go to Hawaii for What? Yeah, for 750 an episode. Yeah.

[Chris D]

No, thanks.

[Giannis Pappas]

Some show that is not gonna. What are we talking about?

[Chris D]

Cis Hawaii.

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't.

[Chris D]

Yeah, let's do it. Yeah, do the audition. Yeah, let me just do it. Yeah, I want. I want you to do the audition.

[Giannis Pappas]

Let's do the audition.

[Chris D]

Yeah, it's just what it is because I'm in a fight with my wife anyway over electrical outlets. She wants the white ones. I want the black ones. So I just might as well do the audition because I'm probably gonna have to move the. To Hawaii.

[Giannis Pappas]

Let's fight.

[Chris D]

Just you. At the end of the day, you just let them win. Right? Is that what the. Is that the. Is that how we survive? Do you just kind of just let them win?

[Giannis Pappas]

You. You kind of have to, because I.

[Chris D]

Just don't want to fight about outlets.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, you just. Yeah, they kind of.

[Chris D]

But it's also. The black ones are nicer, and it's more newer and chic.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, they. They're There something in them that they always are at war. We talked about that. I don't know what that is.

[Chris D]

Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

It must be some maternal instinct or something, like, they're always at war. They want to start wars.

[Chris D]

It's just what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. With repair men, with neighbors. Yeah, whatever. Yeah, whatever it is. Housekeepers, people driving too past fast past your house. They're like, always with their husbands.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right. It's like, we went. We went to this thing last night, and it was cold outside. We had to be outside at this event for the kids. And I was putting a kid. And I was putting my child in. In the car seat in the car. And I go, okay, I mentioned the hat. And she just goes, she didn't have her fucking hat on. And I was like, calm down. Yeah, she dropped it. Yeah, she dropped it. I'm not the enemy. I'm also her father. I don't want her to be cold.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Why are you accusing me immediately of letting her be cold?

[Chris D]

Right?

[Giannis Pappas]

Like, that's the first instinct that came out of you, is that I let her not have her hat on.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

And that's all you care about. Do I matter?

[Chris D]

It's just what it is. I just feel like a fucking worker aunt a lot. Well, you are. A lot of times if my kids ask me anything, I'm like, just ask your mom. Yeah, I don't know. Just ask. I'm like, one of the kids. I'm like, you got to ask Mom. I don't know if you can have that cookie. I don't know what your dental schedule is.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, same, same. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. Just ask Bob to do it.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

So this. It's called the scene. Takes place in a Hawaii police station.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

And I am.

[Chris D]

So. Do I have one of those legs on te. You? Oh, cool. You look like them.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. Detective or.

[Chris D]

So you're Detective Ortiz.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. And I. I go. I go find who. Danny Burkitt. Yeah. Bob Ortiz, DEA Operations Division. Yeah. Thank you, Lieutenant. Though we had an agreement, Kyle. Yeah, but doesn't seem to be the case. I was told that case is closed. The killer was found dead.

[Chris D]

Whoa. Oh, is this ncis Hawaii?

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't fucking know.

[Chris D]

I think it is. Yeah. So. Hey, yeah, I'm the captain. I'm eating pineapple.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

You want me to send it to you and we do the scene?

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, let's do the scene. Yes. Yeah, we're gonna do this.

[Chris D]

This is highly illegal, what we're doing.

[Giannis Pappas]

It is, right?

[Chris D]

Yeah, but who cares?

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. We're actually supposed to be doing this, right?

[Chris D]

Yeah, but it doesn't matter. Here it goes. Okay, here we go.

[Giannis Pappas]

Wait, are we gonna get sued for this?

[Chris D]

No, we're not gonna get sued. Okay, so you're. You're Detective Ortiz. All right. I'm Turner. Yeah, I should have brought him in. Thought I could press him, get him to give me some.

[Giannis Pappas]

Something.

[Chris D]

We'll find him.

[Giannis Pappas]

Find who? Danny. Danny.

[Chris D]

Barquette jumped on the first flight available out of Oahu. Bob. Actually, you. The engine.

[Giannis Pappas]

Helicopter, Bob. DEA Operation division.

[Chris D]

You got more?

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. You have room? Agent Turner and I can speak privately.

[Chris D]

All yours.

[Giannis Pappas]

Thank you, Lieutenant.

[Chris D]

This is it.

[Giannis Pappas]

Thought we had an agreement, Kylie, to.

[Chris D]

Stay out of Ray Burkitt's operation.

[Giannis Pappas]

Then I'll try a different thing. Throw in agreement, Kyle. Yeah, but doesn't seem to be the case.

[Chris D]

You put Ray on the family plan, Bob, Because I'm not touching this business. I'm investigating his son's murder, and Danny Burkhart is a suspect.

[Giannis Pappas]

I was told that case is closed. The killer was found dead.

[Chris D]

Hell of a deal you and Ray made. He's not only untouchable, but also gets to decide who's guilty and who's not.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's his son, Kyle. He's satisfied.

[Chris D]

Well, I'm not. I've also got two other bodies and a dead cop.

[Giannis Pappas]

Listen to me, you goddamn fucking white trash. Those aren't your cases. Your job was to work the Michael Burnett murder. That's over. Hawaii PD will handle any other possible open investigations. So you can head back to the mainland, bucko.

[Chris D]

I'm a little fuzzy from Danny Burkhart hitting me in the head with a pipe, but I'm pretty sure I don't work for the dea, Bob, which means I get to side when my case is closed.

[Giannis Pappas]

You're a good agent, Kyle, and I'm trying to help you. This is coming from way up the food chain, so don't risk your career. You got me trying to punch above your weight class. It won't end well.

[Chris D]

What makes Ray so valuable? The information he passes on to you or the information he has on you? Go home, Kyle.

[Giannis Pappas]

Go home. Wherever that is.

[Chris D]

I gotta go eat a pig.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. So it's just what it is.

[Chris D]

So that's what it is. So this podcast is just better than that shit.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's just better than that shit. It's just what wants to watch that fudgeing scene? I don't know what they're talking about, but I was bored.

[Chris D]

I was bored with it.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. The only way to make it good is to make fun of it on this podcast.

[Chris D]

That's the only way to do it. Now, whatever Hawaiian show that is, I got to think it's Hawaii 5.0, which Bobby Lee has been in.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, he's been on that show.

[Chris D]

Now, what are you going to do if you get it? Are you going to go to Hawaii, do the audition? Yeah, that's what I've been doing.

[Giannis Pappas]

Is I don't do it.

[Chris D]

Is I just been saying. Not. I've been saying, oh, yeah, I'll get that right to you. And then I don't do it. Yeah. So is that. Is it career sabotage or is it that we just generally don't want to do it?

[Giannis Pappas]

We genuinely don't want to do it.

[Chris D]

Or are we sabotaging, let's be honest.

[Giannis Pappas]

Well, I'll tell you a story, Right. You tell me. Remember when Theo Vaughn walked off of a movie set?

[Chris D]

Sure.

[Giannis Pappas]

And everyone in the industry was going, holy shit, his career's over. He walked off a movie set and.

[Chris D]

Then he became Theo Vaughn, and then he wasn't as big as he was.

[Giannis Pappas]

Is his career over?

[Chris D]

It's. No, it. It's not.

[Giannis Pappas]

20 years ago, would his career have been over?

[Chris D]

Yes.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, but is his career over now?

[Chris D]

No, it's a lot bigger.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's a lot.

[Chris D]

I open it for him this weekend.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, it's a lot, lot, lot bigger.

[Chris D]

Yeah. So you tell me. Yeah. Yeah. It's true.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's just something that I understand that causes a lot of people a lot of anxiety.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Who depend on you getting this role. And I don't even know if they depend on you getting this role right now, because how much would I get paid to be.

[Chris D]

Dr. Ortiz, does this tell you in the body of the email? Usually they give you info.

[Giannis Pappas]

Let's take a peek.

[Chris D]

Let's just take a peek at dumb.

[Giannis Pappas]

How much trouble am I gonna get into for this?

[Chris D]

Well, the answer is not a lot, because the power, the beauty of the Internet is it just comes and goes.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

So they'll get mad for a few minutes and nobody cares.

[Giannis Pappas]

So his name's Bob Ortiz, but this is open ethnicity.

[Chris D]

Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

He works with the DEA Operations division on one of the islands. So I'm definitely a prime candidate for this. He's been doing the job for many years, and his finger is on the criminal pulse.

[Chris D]

It's just what it is, indeed.

[Giannis Pappas]

Of the island living in the gray and between law and order. This is a guest starring role and.

[Chris D]

There is no money in the guest starring.

[Giannis Pappas]

There is no money mentioned. Just shooting dates of February. I mean, are you kidding me? February to June in Hawaii. In Hawaii. It's not going to happen. It's not going to happen because then.

[Chris D]

You'Re going to have to cancel your Bakersfield, California day today.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, I got to go to Bakersfield. I mean. I mean, what am I going to. Who would do that for a guest starring role that many months?

[Chris D]

Well, the Thing is, though, there are a lot of people who would do it, but they don't. May not have families like your circumstance different. You got a wife and kids that you want to be a part of.

[Giannis Pappas]

Their life and also other income.

[Chris D]

That's what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, that's what it is.

[Chris D]

If you didn't have this going on, if you weren't doing stand up in pods, you probably would have. What else are you going to do?

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, I would take a nail at it and I wouldn't be a happy camper. Now, I imagine right now it's not a great time to just be an actor. I would think that it's a tough time for that.

[Chris D]

No, because. Can we pull up that AI actress you sent? I just. Just because she said so. The AI actress that. That Giannis sent here is this new AI actress that's going to be in a movie. And the creator said I didn't want to make her look perfect and so beautiful. And this is one of the hottest women I've ever seen. And I go peeling every time I see her. So this isn't it. This is a child drawing, Jesse. And. And this is the wrong time to get hard. Yeah, yeah. There's Giannis throwing hands.

[Giannis Pappas]

Let me ask you this question.

[Chris D]

No, it's down a little bit, Jess. It was because it was from today, it was from the morning.

[Giannis Pappas]

Have you also ever done, like a full production like that? That was actually not like a little tedious, having to sit around all day, all this stuff and.

[Chris D]

No, you always.

[Giannis Pappas]

The only things I've ever enjoyed is stuff that I did that actually had fun doing because we could just shoot it right away.

[Chris D]

Could you imagine us trying to pitch this idea of a show to the industry? They would have stopped it at the name History Hyenas.

[Giannis Pappas]

Oh, yeah.

[Chris D]

They would have just made us change.

[Giannis Pappas]

They would have, like, I don't even understand the name. The acronym's a little weird. And we're like, that's unintentional. Yeah, we didn't think of that.

[Chris D]

What it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. We just like hyenas and we like history. Yeah.

[Chris D]

At least we're not making it a promo code. Like, who company makes a promo code?

[Giannis Pappas]

One of them. Yeah.

[Chris D]

Hh.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, someone did Slash hh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They didn't think that through.

[Chris D]

Yeah, it's just what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. So this is a full.

[Chris D]

Yeah, I know. This happens to my Instagram sometimes, too. I go to click on it and, oh, here it is. I mean, look at her. They said. They said she's not too beautiful, but pretty. I disagree.

[Giannis Pappas]

I disagree as well. Yeah. I mean, she's as beautiful as beautiful can be.

[Chris D]

I mean, Nick, you would go to town on that. Right?

[Giannis Pappas]

And this is the woman that created her.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Who's also pretty.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, I just. It's so funny how women just want to take jobs from women.

[Chris D]

Well, you know what's crazy though, because we look at it, our minds are blown and they think it's. And listen, I know it will get to the point where it's indistinguishable, but my daughter, I was watching this, right, With Jazz, and my daughter didn't know that this was AI she wasn't, but she looked. My daughter right away, at 10 years old was like, oh, that woman, she's A.I.

[Giannis Pappas]

Really?

[Chris D]

She knew it right away. The kids know.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

So.

[Giannis Pappas]

But here's the thing. This just came out, right? Like, it just. If you look at Grok's animation from a year ago, Right. And now the animation in a year's time, in 12 months, how they have advanced it, this is like the first incarnation of it.

[Chris D]

Right. That's what I'm saying.

[Giannis Pappas]

So it's going to get to a point where it's absolutely indistinguishable.

[Chris D]

All right. So they.

[Giannis Pappas]

This is almost indistinguishable.

[Chris D]

Well, I think what. This woman had a nice point too. She's the creator of it. She said she thinks it'll be three categories. There'll be human actors and actresses that will still exist. There'll be anime, which there is right now. And then there'll be an AI cast category.

[Giannis Pappas]

100%.

[Chris D]

Like AI categories will win Oscars.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, right. I think you're right. And I think that's fine. Though that only leads in my mind to one potential conclusion, is that I think live plays will. People will get a taste for that.

[Chris D]

I want to do a one man show. What do you think?

[Giannis Pappas]

Want to do a one man show?

[Chris D]

What you're going to call one man show with you? So it's two man, but we'll call it a one man show. Well, me and you will get in a pony suit together.

[Giannis Pappas]

How about Chris DiStefano versus the black and White Cookie?

[Chris D]

That's what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

That could be a good one. Chris DiStefano, verse dessert.

[Chris D]

Diverse dessert.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're in the program. Chris DiStefano in the program.

[Chris D]

Chris in the program.

[Giannis Pappas]

Colon. Chris Distant.

[Chris D]

I want to do a one man show. Big because I just am looking for ways to stay in Nuevajo.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. Or I Could do a woman show called Giannis Pappas. I'm talking, but nobody's listening.

[Chris D]

It's what it is. Yeah, Yeah. I mean, I just. I mean, this girl's got beautiful eyebrows, beautiful teeth, and. No, the thing about AI is they have no fumes.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's the thing about them. When the robots come out, you know, you're going to be able to tailor the fume that. That you want. Right. And I'm going straight to nectarine with a little mix of cantaloupe.

[Chris D]

It's just what it is. And some guys like a little fumade, and they're going to. There'll be a button for that.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, there'll be a button for that. It'll be called over 50 and a little more perverted.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's because there's something about when you get older where you like a nice little tang. You like. You like a little kick.

[Chris D]

What it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

You like a little kick. Like, you know how you get even with your taste buds as you get older? You want a little spice.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Because it's been matted down by so many years of your taste buds being salted that you need a little extra hot sauce. When you get a little older, you want a little kick.

[Chris D]

There was one of our friends at the dinner the other day was telling us about how his neighbor, who's, like, in his early 60s, had sex with a homeless woman in Philadelphia last weekend. So that's what it is. So guys just start to do that. He went down to Philly and he had sex with a homeless woman. Yeah. And it's. He paid her, and it was a prostitution thing, but she was a homeless woman living on the streets of Philadelphia, and he banged her out.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

And he has no regrets. No regrets.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

And it's just what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

Now, Jesse, do you like a little kick? Nick and Jesse, you guys like a little kick? It's getting a little more appealing, I gotta be honest. It is right as you get older. Just a little bit.

[Chris D]

Like a little imperfection. Yeah, right, right, right. Cause you're horned up just like a little.

[Giannis Pappas]

Oh, you want a little head like Fat Joe. Lean back where you first take the.

[Chris D]

You just.

[Giannis Pappas]

Whoa.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Nick, what do you like? Do you like a little kick? I like it a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. From now on, he's Nick the Kick.

[Giannis Pappas]

He's Nick the Kick. Nick likes a little kick.

[Chris D]

Nick likes a kick. Nick likes a spicy meatball. By the way, speaking of. Speaking of spicy meatballs, you know what movie I watched this weekend that I haven't seen in so long the Mask with Jim Carrey. He's so unbelievable in that. And what I've noticed is my kids, without even choosing it, stay focused and watch the movies from the 90s. Ace Ventura, the Mask, these Jim Carrey. They watch them and are paid attention to these movies for so much longer than all the new movies.

[Giannis Pappas]

Maybe they're the generation after Z. Right. Maybe they'll come back to more long form.

[Chris D]

They like it.

[Giannis Pappas]

Maybe they will be the ones who come back to more long form.

[Chris D]

My daughter told me that YouTube shorts gives her a headache.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

It's too much rapid fire.

[Giannis Pappas]

I also think AI with the help of AI it's going to help these kids that are raised with it. It'll help them kind of understand the world at the speed. Because it's obvious that our nervous systems have not kept up with technological innovation.

[Chris D]

No.

[Giannis Pappas]

So the technology ahead, but our nervous system hasn't caught enough.

[Chris D]

Sure.

[Giannis Pappas]

That could be the generation, like the first generation that starts adapting and catches up. And we could be heading into a very, very, very honest future when it comes to entertainment, friendship, everything like that. Because AI can assist you to discern who you're dealing with. You tell AI like, I have this friend. This is what they're doing. And I will just go, you know, covert narcissist, blah, blah, blah. Childhood wounds being masked by this. And you go, oh, that's.

[Chris D]

But you got to be careful with the AI and to specifically tell it to, to not just tell you what you want to hear.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

It is a little bit of bias. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

You can always go, give me the non politically correct truthful answer. And there's ways to prompt it.

[Chris D]

Don't be biased.

[Giannis Pappas]

Get like, really? It can tell you things that are like. You're like, ooh, sometimes they cut.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Like tell me about me.

[Chris D]

Tell me what I don't want to hear.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. And then, and then it will do that.

[Chris D]

Well, and it's reversing now too, because I went to a party last night and they specifically told, and they told us this in the invitation, that they will be a person that had those yonder bags. You're putting your phones in the bag when you come into the. The party because of just. We want you to socialize.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

And you really do when it's not on you. Now, granted, I was with my family, so I had my kids and people near me. I probably would have had a little bit more anxiety if I was like, I don't have a way. If my family has an Emergency, they can't get in touch with me. Right. That's that. But that's really your brain just manipulating you, saying you need the phone. But when I was with them, you're very at peace without it. And I think more people are starting to understand that. I think more people, because it used to be just five years years ago that same party would be like, scan this QR code and it's Snapchat filters and all that. And now it's reversed. Now it's get the phone away.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, right, yeah. But I think the phone is going to be an archaic version of what's coming.

[Chris D]

So it's just going to be implanted.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, I mean it's just the technology. There's never a rebellion against the technology. I mean it always just. There's a symbiotic relationship that develops eventually. And we're just a generation that can't handle it.

[Chris D]

Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

Like it's too strong for us. We grew up, up without it. And then you have the Gen Z who grew up on it, but they're the first generation that's just getting confused by it. And then I think the generation afterwards may be the ones who able to pull back and kind of deal with it the right way and then take it wherever it's going to be. Because the Internet's not just going to be on your phone. They're going to fucking implant.

[Chris D]

Yeah. You got to resist it.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to become cyborg or not resist it. You have to coexist with it.

[Chris D]

Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's not going away. Right. And it's too convenient and it helps too much and in too many capacities for people to outright reject.

[Chris D]

You have to figure out a way how to filter out the bad, healthily.

[Giannis Pappas]

Filter out the, the bed and, and deal with it. Just like on the Internet, it's most, a lot of pros and then there's some cons. You do have your child trafficking, you do have your, all this other stuff, but you also do get your news. You do.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

You know, we're, we're able to learn so much more.

[Chris D]

Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

Faster.

[Chris D]

Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

So it's just one of those things that I think people eventually will adapt to. I do think, I do think, if you think about it, I think authentic will become more of a currency because it'll just be so much harder to pull the wool over anyone's eye.

[Chris D]

Sure.

[Giannis Pappas]

Because with the assistance of AI and their analysis and the just sheer exposure that people get now, they're going to be able to like locate, you know, to Pinpoint, like just fraudulent personalities and, and scams and things a lot easier.

[Chris D]

A lot easier.

[Giannis Pappas]

I think that's, I think that is.

[Chris D]

Without a doubt 100%.

[Giannis Pappas]

Cuz because this was an era where you see like a lot of people learn the ways of marketing firms.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

And then now I think the people are backlashing on that, going like, oh, wait a minute.

[Chris D]

Right.

[Giannis Pappas]

They're just doing a lot of wait.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Like with the. Now, Now I used to be like whenever anything, anybody would post something on Instagram and be like, oh, if you want to get this book, comment, the word book or whatever, right. Now I look at that, I'm like, I actually unfollow you now for that.

[Giannis Pappas]

And the kids are starting to go to know that they're going to look at a guy like John, Jake Paul, they're going to understand that this was like a gaslight, right. Like it was an Internet era. Like kid can box, kids got one punch. But you know, he handpicked his opponents to be smaller or older and marketed it a certain way.

[Chris D]

So do you think he told Joshua to hold back a little bit?

[Giannis Pappas]

No, no, I think he ran. I think he ran and he grabbed his legs. I think he was fighting a fighter who's been out of the ring for.

[Chris D]

Joshua broke his jaw for 15 months.

[Giannis Pappas]

And he broke his jaw in two places.

[Chris D]

Just what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

So it was like reality comes coming down, right? So it was like, it's one of those things, we see it in comedy. I mean, no offense to anyone, I, I love the Internet. I think it's the greatest thing. But you know, there's just a lot of career features out there who, you know, live, you're like, that's a feature, right? Who's just like. Or selling out. You got a lot of these gimmick comedians who are selling out and that's great. It's all great because they've been consumed in one minute bits. But it has nothing to do with the pro ranks, right? Like for live standup, right? The comedians know the pro ranks, right. Just like the boxers know the pro ranks, right? So a boxer watches Jake Paul and goes, that's not that impressive. He's got a little power in one hand.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

But he's drying people out or he's fighting smaller guys or he's doing all the things that a lot of Internet personalities do to hide the reality of the situation. And I think the younger generations are just going to be like, look for the catch more and go now that's right. That's bullshit.

[Chris D]

Some real stuff.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. They're going to be able to figure.

[Chris D]

It out now because. Is this a YouTube episode? Is this a Patreon? How did you feel?

[Giannis Pappas]

We will decide.

[Chris D]

Well, because we got it, we wanted to do. Because it's the end the Of. Of the year for the lists we're going to do. For this list, we're going to do the PPW list. The actual super bowl winner of who is the name of the year. And we actually went all the way back to the beginning from when we started this podcast, when we brought it back. November 5th, 2025. Yeah, no, November 5th, 2024. All the way through every. Every week of 2025. And we have the list.

[Giannis Pappas]

Ooh, that's juicy.

[Chris D]

All the PPWs.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'm excited.

[Chris D]

So do you want to do it now?

[Giannis Pappas]

Let's do it now. And then we can either leave it on this episode or copy.

[Chris D]

It's what it is. So it's either going to be right here now, where you heard it on YouTube, or it's patreon.com historyainas we don't know.

[Giannis Pappas]

We don't know.

[Chris D]

But this is the list. This is kind of a big moment now. This is going to be really difficult. This may take some time to sift it because this is every name that I'm about to read was an actual winner.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

And then next week's episode is the. Is the walked into one list.

[Giannis Pappas]

You don't want to miss that one.

[Chris D]

So that one will 100% be on Patreon.

[Giannis Pappas]

There's no debate about that.

[Chris D]

That has to be [e-mail] history hyenas because it is the names that were so bad that we had to make it. We couldn't even say them publicly.

[Giannis Pappas]

That decision's been made before it even was asked.

[Chris D]

That was made by the United States government.

[Giannis Pappas]

That is made by the legal system.

[Chris D]

Okay, so here it is. So here are the names from the. Every winner from week one till now. Here we go. So starting starting off, the Vatican's daycare would not return me to my mom. Fumariana Grande.

[Giannis Pappas]

This is going to be impossible.

[Chris D]

Well, but we're gonna have to just listen.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's gonna be impossible.

[Chris D]

So we're gonna have to. You're gonna have to tell me on the list.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

So I don't know how to do this. I don't know if it's. Do we just read them how.

[Giannis Pappas]

I didn't even think about how hard you actually mentioned it. Yeah, I didn't even think about that looking it over.

[Chris D]

It's.

[Giannis Pappas]

Whoa.

[Chris D]

So why don't we do that?

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, if you start with that one.

[Chris D]

Yeah. So why. What do we do? Why don't we do this? Why don't we? Why don't we. It only gets to make the list if it gets a collective laugh from the four of us. Because let's go back to as. As the Stoics said, you never step in the same river twice.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right.

[Chris D]

So we're stepping back in the river, but it's a different river. So under different circumstances, under different guises, we may not. It may not hit us as hard as it did when we first read it.

[Giannis Pappas]

Okay?

[Chris D]

So if it still garnishes a laugh from us now out loud, the four of us, it's got to make the list.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

To the finals.

[Giannis Pappas]

I just want you to say I'm no sign scientist. I don't know what I'm talking about, but I know 100% for a fact this is going to be as hard as string theory.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's how hard.

[Chris D]

Yeah. This is Fibonacci right now.

[Giannis Pappas]

This is Fibonacci right now. This is going to be nearly impossible.

[Chris D]

Ok. So the Vatican's daycare will not return me to my mom. Fumariana Grande. The Virgin Fumari.

[Giannis Pappas]

I think we can Drexler. Fumariana Grande.

[Chris D]

Because. Well, because. And now listen, the reason why it's on the list is because this was the first time we had heard people have copied it. Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right. But just when it goes up against the one before, it's the definition.

[Chris D]

So you know that one's out. Yep. The Virgin Fumari.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to Drex for that.

[Chris D]

We know that one's out. Yeah. We can also say we know some are out even though they won.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yes.

[Chris D]

Jewish tunnel tour guide.

[Giannis Pappas]

That one's got to stick around for.

[Chris D]

Stick around.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

The diarrhea of Anne Franks and beats.

[Giannis Pappas]

We got to keep that around.

[Chris D]

Just keep it. Jesus Christ. Yep. Then we got Squeak Slingshot.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's so good, though. But I think people are on the fence. We're going to Drexler.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

What do you think?

[Chris D]

Yeah. Drexler. That's a Barack is a queen because he sucks on Big Mike's Peenladder. Contender. That's just what Contender still in the race. Quee for Sutherland.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to Drex of that because I. The Patreon members did say that that was a copy from some place.

[Chris D]

Got it. But it is very funny.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. Drexler.

[Chris D]

Benjamin Nutting on you we're going to Drexler. Okay. My big fat Greek ass. Pussy. So that one has to stay. And Nick actually hasn't heard all these because Nick came on later. Right?

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chris D]

This one I think is going to stay because it's a classic one. We still talk about it. Greg Lubedanus.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to keep that around. If you don't know the swimmer Greg Louganis, he was a gay kid who hit his head on the diving board. But he was a very famous Olympian.

[Chris D]

Yes. And I believe he. Did he have hiv?

[Giannis Pappas]

He did have hiv.

[Chris D]

Did have hiv. Or Somalians call the diving board the plank.

[Giannis Pappas]

If you were a gay guy in the 80s or 90s, I mean HIV was just synonymous.

[Chris D]

It's just being gay.

[Giannis Pappas]

There's another way you could refer to a gay guy.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Frozen grapes in my ass. Then walking around shit like a deer ender. But it is shitting like a deer.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Make no mistake, I'm dating a 4 foot 11 Latina and fully expect to wake up with my piece cut off. But it's okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to Drexler.

[Chris D]

Okay. Uncle Touchy's puzzle basement. Good one.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to Drexler.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Because I think that one. That one also was from, I believe the Are you garbage Patreon something. It was also fake.

[Giannis Pappas]

That was one Peyton Oswal bit.

[Chris D]

That's what it was.

[Giannis Pappas]

Good memory, Yanni.

[Chris D]

Then we got. Yanni sees tits like a Venn diagram.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to keep that one.

[Chris D]

Yep. Because his eyes are very close together.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to keep that.

[Chris D]

Then we got no dsp so I decided to cut it off and just have a crease. It's what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

Really good.

[Chris D]

Gotta go though. Right. I think if it's really good, we got a drag straight. Unfortunately, if it's not a hell no. If it's not a hell yes, it's a no.

[Giannis Pappas]

Gotta go.

[Chris D]

That's. We have to do. My trans cock has surprised more Italians and Mount Vesuvius.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're keeping that in. We're keeping. We got. This is hard. This is trying to do a top five basketball players of all time. It's very fucking.

[Chris D]

Very hard. And there will be. There will be a lot of people in the comments who disagree with us. But you have to understand the position that we're in.

[Giannis Pappas]

You have to understand the difficulty, the degree of difficulty.

[Chris D]

I live in that awkward space between Yanni's eyes.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to drag slip. Because the other one's better. The Van Dyke Diagrams better rekindling with.

[Chris D]

My wife after Donnie T. Sends my gumar back to the doctor.

[Giannis Pappas]

We gotta keep that.

[Chris D]

Yeah, it's just what it is because. Because that just feels like a guy's telling the truth.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, that's just funny. Yeah.

[Chris D]

Yeah. So he's kind of like, you know, he doesn't hate the idea. Yeah. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

He's kind of made peace with it.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

He found the solution to his problem.

[Chris D]

Yeah. It's just what it is. So we got rock hard from Blue Chew. I have to think of my wife's sister to glue. Glue. My dad's a juju, but my mom is not. Phew. Phew.

[Giannis Pappas]

We gotta keep it. I mean, what are you gonna do?

[Chris D]

Wife thinks I take pole cause Yanni makes me witch hazel my hole.

[Giannis Pappas]

We can. We can drex to that.

[Chris D]

Because the Yanni ones, we. We do feel that the strongest Yanni one is Yanni. Ceased hits like a Van Dyke.

[Giannis Pappas]

And that's also very inside baseball with the witch hazel.

[Chris D]

Nice.

[Giannis Pappas]

Very inside baseball.

[Chris D]

Nate Barnazzi.

[Giannis Pappas]

We gotta keep it.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

We gotta keep it because.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's fun when someone actually gets it right. Yeah.

[Chris D]

Then we got got Akash Singh better laugh and agree or Schultz is getting a new H1B.

[Giannis Pappas]

I mean, pull out. Pull out. I'm talking about. I don't want a fucking pull chain cannon. I want a solar powered double barrel fucking catapult.

[Chris D]

It's just what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

Throw that one over the wall.

[Chris D]

Okay, so that one's a big contender. Then we got. Make no mistake, if the boys lived in 1940s Germany, Chrissy D would definitely dime out Yanni P to a sharp dress goose stepper ff. I don't think it makes the list. I think it's great, but it's just. This is a different thing.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's a different thing.

[Chris D]

We're talking hall of famers. It's obviously excellent.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. You know, but you're not first ballot.

[Chris D]

Michael Rockefeller's barbecued penis. That's because he was eaten by cannibals in New Guinea.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. And we did the Son of Nelson. Loved it.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're gonna Drexler it.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

Even though it's very funny.

[Chris D]

It's what it is. This is. We have to make tough decisions.

[Giannis Pappas]

This is really tough. This is Sophie's Choice.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Two knuckles in. And now my pee turned white.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to Drexler.

[Chris D]

Drexler that. Okay. Casa Gaza Resort and Casino. Jihadi jackpot dealer.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to Drexler.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

That should be on the Walked into one list. Yeah.

[Chris D]

Might vote Democrat because Donnie T. Took my landscapers. We're going to keep that. Okay. That's a good reason to switch your allegiance now. We got. Call me pest control. The way I'm bug chasing.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to Drex there.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Because he's looking to get. I mean, aids. They call him pest control.

[Giannis Pappas]

What do you think? This is too hard.

[Chris D]

Sorry, Debo. That was Debo's personal favorite.

[Giannis Pappas]

Was it?

[Chris D]

Yeah. But sorry about that. Unemployed crisis actor.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's a good one. We're going to Drex. We're going to Chicken Finger and Drex rip.

[Chris D]

Two things that make Yanni puing trans women and cute radiator covers.

[Giannis Pappas]

What do we do?

[Chris D]

I think that we have to. It is inside. It's from the First Reich and I do appreciate it. Jesse's dad. Jesse's dad is the one who makes the radiator cover. So. But I don't think it's good enough for this specific list.

[Giannis Pappas]

You know. And also that can be. You know, when you hear one like that, you know, we're talking about a hardcore serious fan.

[Chris D]

So we want to salute you members.

[Giannis Pappas]

When Chris was making. Saying that I love radio.

[Chris D]

Yeah. So I want to make it. I want to make it clear that we support your long term, you know, belief in the show. And it's just. It's a great name, but this. We're just doing something different here.

[Giannis Pappas]

Doing something different here.

[Chris D]

That's all. I yelled ice on the 7 train because I wanted to see.

[Giannis Pappas]

Just gotta keep it. I just gotta keep it. I'm just not comfortable getting rid of it.

[Chris D]

Yeah. It's just what it is. I took ayahuasca, but the shaman touched my titi kaka. Now my fumes are interdimensional.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to Drexler.

[Chris D]

Okay. Yanni's eyes having a border crisis. It's what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

Really good.

[Chris D]

We're going to Venn diagram. Yeah. Romanian cam girl, AKA no fumes through zooms.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to Drexler. A good one, though.

[Chris D]

Hot Wheels in my ass. Call it the Lincoln Tunnel. Got a laugh from Nick.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to have to keep that. Yeah. We got to keep.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Guys put Matchbox cars in his ass.

[Chris D]

I respect it.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Muzzy woman forced to dress as a voting booth but not allowed to vote way song. She ain't. It's.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's too good.

[Chris D]

It's just a good one. So we're going to keep it around because it's just what it is just too good. Why does Akash Singh always fuck up my order at Dunk Donuts? We're going to Drexler because the other akash1 is 14 on the Runway, but the pilots at DEI higher.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's inside one probably walked into one. It's a walked in one. It's also inside because on the Runway is one of our expressions. That means you're close to D. Right. Means you're not going to die because the pilot's a dii. It's very brilliant.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Salute you.

[Chris D]

Drexler booty and the whole fist.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's a good one. We're going to Drexler.

[Chris D]

It. Glenn Greenwald's bunion removal service.

[Giannis Pappas]

Personal favorite. The news has kind of come and went.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Going to Drexler. And just so the people know, Glenn Greenwald. What was it he liked to jerk off to women's feet.

[Giannis Pappas]

No, no. He was the journalist that made the video. The gay guy guy who. The video was released where he had a young Brazilian guy and he was licking his feet.

[Chris D]

That's what it is. Yeah. Yep.

[Giannis Pappas]

Do you remember that?

[Chris D]

Yep, I remember that. Yeah. That was when we were still.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

We didn't have the studio yet.

[Giannis Pappas]

And he was doing it in a dress.

[Chris D]

Yeah. It's just what it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And his name publicly was Glenn Greenwald. Privately, it was Giannis Poppins. That's right. So then we got. You can lead a horse to water, but you still need a step stool to it.

[Giannis Pappas]

We got to keep it.

[Chris D]

I mean, got to keep it going to land. From everybody. A muzzy kid who likes money. AKA Lebanese or Scrooge Lebanon.

[Giannis Pappas]

So good. But we're going to drag Drex.

[Chris D]

It's not for this list dog. This $5 was going to a Cambodian cam model anyway. Might as well learn something.

[Giannis Pappas]

Keep it around.

[Chris D]

Colombian cam model. Sorry.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Andrew Cuomo's tit handshake.

[Giannis Pappas]

Very funny. We're going to drag slurring chicken finger.

[Chris D]

Met a lady boy and told her, don't tuck it. I want to lick Thai sweet chili off your chicken McNugget.

[Giannis Pappas]

Just get just what it is. Can't get rid of it.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Jesse's Mossad handler.

[Giannis Pappas]

We get a Drexer.

[Chris D]

That Drexer. Right. Okay. Y and yill cleaned off my grill. Cheap labor from across the border.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to Drexler it.

[Chris D]

Okay. Neck brace, AKA Jewish turtleneck.

[Giannis Pappas]

That is a known thing. So we have to Drexler. It's not an original one.

[Chris D]

It is funny. There were no Leroy's on Epstein's list because Carnival Cruise didn't stop there.

[Giannis Pappas]

Get out the solar panels. Double barrel catapult.

[Chris D]

It's just what it is. That was a big one.

[Giannis Pappas]

That was a big one.

[Chris D]

Hunter Biden's camera lens. That adds ten pounds. And crackpipe.

[Giannis Pappas]

We'll get a drag strip.

[Chris D]

What did the Frisbee do to the oven? Walked into one.

[Giannis Pappas]

So good.

[Chris D]

Yeah, but.

[Giannis Pappas]

But it belongs on the walk.

[Chris D]

That one. Yes. So that's okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Gluey CK says don't look away from the spray.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's really good. We're going to Drexler it. And just. Just out of respect for his greatness.

[Chris D]

Used a rib condom on Helen Keller and her pussy started speaking to me.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to keep that around for a second.

[Chris D]

Yeah. That's just because it is fun. Funny to think about. It's braille. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's just too good.

[Chris D]

Shirt and crying dude. So we got shirt and pool. AKA Mexican Ozempic.

[Giannis Pappas]

So good. We got to keep it.

[Chris D]

Got to keep. Okay. There's. All right.

[Giannis Pappas]

I know this is a problem.

[Chris D]

Fine. It's fine. We knew it was going to be hard. Accidentally came in her ass. Now expecting Leroy's.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to walk.

[Chris D]

Got it.

[Giannis Pappas]

Got to get out of there.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

I can't believe that word got three through the goalie.

[Chris D]

I identify as a U.S. citizen. Rodriguez.

[Giannis Pappas]

Very good. We're going to chicken finger that double.

[Chris D]

Parked on 3rd Avenue. Got a muzzy coupon.

[Giannis Pappas]

That is a classic.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to keep that around. That made it into Lexus.

[Chris D]

Muzzy coupon is a parking ticket from a parking meter. Who are mostly Pakistan Pakistani in our city.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

I'm a torta pounder. Call me an ice pick.

[Giannis Pappas]

Really good. We're going to Drexler it.

[Chris D]

Soaping my ass so Chrissy troubles can blow bubbles.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to drex through it.

[Chris D]

My side piece is Jewish, so I call her my Jumar.

[Giannis Pappas]

So good. We're going to Drexler it.

[Chris D]

Okay. Call me a lesbian pirate and scissor me timbers.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to Drexler it.

[Chris D]

Okay. Conquestador.

[Giannis Pappas]

Drexler. Chicken finger.

[Chris D]

Taking Leroy. So I finally have the strength to leave my family.

[Giannis Pappas]

We are going to keep that around and we're going to get out a catapult for it.

[Chris D]

Then we got don't walk Josephine through Frushing Priests.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to keep that one around. It's just what it is.

[Chris D]

Okay. So here is the. This is. Let me read out. We're gonna have to do this. I mean, we got about 15 or so of them that's made it to the second round.

[Giannis Pappas]

God, this is like, you know, moving up. It gets harder and harder.

[Chris D]

It's just harder. And we just have to do it. Jewish tunnel tour guide.

[Giannis Pappas]

Let's chicken finger that.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right? Yeah.

[Chris D]

I don't think it's holding up the diarrhea of Anne Franks and beans.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're going to Drexler that.

[Chris D]

Okay. Barack is a queen because he sucks on Big Mike's queen. I'm sorry. Barack is a queen because he sucks on Big Mike's peen line of 14.

[Giannis Pappas]

You know what to do with that.

[Chris D]

Gotta. Gotta keep it around. Go into the next round to say that one. My big fat Greek ass pussy.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're gonna. We're gonna chicken finger that.

[Chris D]

Hey, that's out of here.

[Giannis Pappas]

Drexler.

[Chris D]

Frozen grapes in my ass. Then walk around shitting like a deer.

[Giannis Pappas]

You know what to do.

[Chris D]

Okay, so that one's moved on to the second round.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Yanni's. Yanni sees tits like a veteran. Diagram.

[Giannis Pappas]

Really good. What do you think, Drexler?

[Chris D]

My trans cock has surprised more Italians. And Mount Vesuvius.

[Giannis Pappas]

That one's got the next round.

[Chris D]

Yep. Some I just know rekindling with my wife after Donnie T. Sends my Gamar back to the doctor.

[Giannis Pappas]

I think that one's got to stick around.

[Chris D]

Okay, that's fine. Rock hard from a blue Chew. I have to think of my wife's sister to glue. Glue. My dad's a juju, but my mom is not future. I get. I mean, you're laughing, right? I feel like it Just can't take it. Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

Can't get rid of it.

[Chris D]

Nate Barnazzi.

[Giannis Pappas]

We're gonna chicken figure that.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

Out of respect for his greatness.

[Chris D]

Then we got Akash Singh. Better laugh and agree or Schultz is getting a new H1B.

[Giannis Pappas]

I can't get rid of it.

[Chris D]

Okay, that's fine. Yeah, we can't get rid of it. That's fine. So right now on that first row, we still have 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. Still. Okay. Around then we have. I yelled ice on the 7 train because I wanted a seat.

[Giannis Pappas]

Good one.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

You know, keep it. I mean, this list. What do we do? I think. What do you think?

[Chris D]

If we're not all in agreement, it just has to.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Muzzy Woman forced to dress as a voting booth but not allowed to vote.

[Giannis Pappas]

That can't go anywhere.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

So that just can't go anywhere.

[Chris D]

Hot Wheels in my ass. Call it the Lincoln Tunnel.

[Giannis Pappas]

I hate to do this, but we have to.

[Chris D]

Drexler, this is hard. We got to just, you know, got to trust our intuition on this one. You can lead a horse to water, but you still need a step stool to it.

[Giannis Pappas]

I feel bad getting rid of it for that.

[Chris D]

But if we have to, though, well.

[Giannis Pappas]

What I can do, I don't know. On my own. I don't want to be the only guilty party.

[Chris D]

I. I say Drexler.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's Drexler, Nick. Really funny, but, yeah, broad in scope.

[Chris D]

It's not as broad as yes dog. This $5 was going to a Colombian cam model anyway. Might as well learn something.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'm not comfortable getting rid of that.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

And that's what it is. Met a lady boy and told her, don't tuck it. I want to lick Thai sweet chili off your chicken McNugget. That's got to stay.

[Giannis Pappas]

I thought it was chicken meat.

[Chris D]

He said Chicken McNugget. There were no Leroy's on Epstein's list because Carnival cruise didn't stop there. So that one's in there? Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Don't even finish saying it.

[Chris D]

Used a rib condom on Helen Keller and her pussy started speaking to me.

[Giannis Pappas]

I hate to do it.

[Chris D]

You got to get rid of it.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. We got chicken finger. We got it. Yeah.

[Chris D]

Shirt and pool. AKA Mexican Ozempic.

[Giannis Pappas]

There's no way we're getting rid of that.

[Chris D]

And then we got taking Leroy. So I finally have the strength to leave my family.

[Giannis Pappas]

There's no way we can get rid of that.

[Chris D]

Okay. And then don't walk Josephine Dufreshing Priests.

[Giannis Pappas]

I think we're going to chicken finger that because it's a borderline walk. Dinner one.

[Chris D]

Okay, that's fine.

[Giannis Pappas]

We have to.

[Chris D]

We have to.

[Giannis Pappas]

Oh, God.

[Chris D]

Okay, here we go. Here's the next round. We're in the semifinals now because I.

[Giannis Pappas]

Feel like playing chess against Magnus Carlsen.

[Chris D]

This is very, very difficult. We're not saying this is easy. And we thank the fans first for sticking around. And, you know, this is hard for us, too. Barack is a queen because he sucks on big Mike's peenlight of 14.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's. It's making it to the next round.

[Chris D]

Still around. Okay. Frozen grapes in my ass. Then walk around shitting like a deer.

[Giannis Pappas]

You were keeping that to the next round.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

These are the heavyweights.

[Chris D]

My trans cock has surprised more Italians amount.

[Giannis Pappas]

Vesuvius is the heavyweights.

[Chris D]

Okay. Rekindling with my wife after Donnie T. Sends my gumard back to. To the doctor. We have to get Rid of it. Yeah. If it's. If it's not. If it's not initially. Bang. We gotta go.

[Giannis Pappas]

This hurts.

[Chris D]

It hurts, but it's out.

[Giannis Pappas]

Feel like choosing between your kids?

[Chris D]

It's bad. Rock hard from bluechew. I have to think of my wife's sister to glue. Glue. My dad's a juju, but my mom is not. Few. Few. All right.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's the funniest one.

[Chris D]

Akash Singh better laugh and agree or Schultz is getting a new H1B.

[Giannis Pappas]

He's a friend of ours.

[Chris D]

He's a friend of ours. I. We're not gonna have this up in lights anymore. I think we got to just get. He's also. Since it's come out. He's been through enough.

[Giannis Pappas]

He's been through enough.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Been through enough. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's a matter of fact now that I'm rereading, and I think his wife might. His wife might be on the Patriot. Might be hurt. So I just don't want to do it to the kid anymore.

[Giannis Pappas]

What it is.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's what it is.

[Chris D]

What it is. So Muzzy Woman forced to dress as a voting booth but not allowed to vote.

[Giannis Pappas]

There's no way that's going anywhere.

[Chris D]

Okay? So that is okay, dog. This $5 was going to a Colombian cam model anyway. Might as well learn something.

[Giannis Pappas]

Hate to do it.

[Chris D]

Yeah. I don't think it's going to make it. Met a lady boy and told her, don't tuck it. I want to lick Thai sweet chili.

[Giannis Pappas]

For chicken McNugget, I would have preferred chicken meat.

[Chris D]

So then it's got to go.

[Giannis Pappas]

I am going to Drexler.

[Chris D]

It's got to go. There were no Leroy's on Epstein's list because Carnival Cruise didn't stop there.

[Giannis Pappas]

What are we. There's no way. Yeah. There's no way.

[Chris D]

Have to keep it. Okay. Shirt and pool. AKA Mexican Ozempic. I think it's got to go.

[Giannis Pappas]

Gotta go, right?

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

In comparison.

[Chris D]

In comparison, that's all this is.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Taking Leroy so I finally have the strength to leave my family.

[Giannis Pappas]

That can't go anywhere.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

That can't go anywhere.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

So, I mean, I know these are borderline. Walked into ones, but they're too good.

[Chris D]

So now we have. Still on the list. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. We have seven left. We're down to seven.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. Now, I want you listening at home to understand. I want you to try to figure this out. Okay. I'm telling you, right? This is like figuring out actually what fucking Dark matter is. I know there's no way to do this. It's very at the point now where this is like, this is impossible.

[Chris D]

To the point. Do you think that we have to call in someone and ask for help?

[Giannis Pappas]

We may have to do.

[Chris D]

Who do we call? Who do we phone? A friend.

[Giannis Pappas]

Who should we phone?

[Chris D]

Who do you think? Who do we think? Who. Who would pick up Tim? Would he pick up Tim Or Debo?

[Giannis Pappas]

Let's go, Debo. Let's go, Debo.

[Chris D]

I think. I think. I think.

[Giannis Pappas]

Call him on the Fisher Price phone.

[Chris D]

All right, let's do it. Yeah. Let me see Debo.

[Giannis Pappas]

Call Debo.

[Chris D]

Okay, I'm not.

[Giannis Pappas]

I'm not. I'm not having this. Hang on my head.

[Chris D]

Okay, here we go. Yeah, here we go.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's great because we know he's home.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Or could be. He could be loaded up bags.

[Giannis Pappas]

He could be getting ready to take flight. He's actual pilot.

[Chris D]

Hello? Cuz? Yeah, where are you? Are you. Are you in the plane right now? Yeah, I'm in the plane. All right, listen, cuz, you're on history hyenas. Oh, what's up? Yeah, Johnny's here, Jesse's here, Nick's here. Okay, got it. Can you hear it now? I can hear.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

Okay, Devo, we got a situation. We're doing the. The ppw. The Pseudo Penis of the weak list. We've gotten this thing down to seven names and we really need your help to help us pick who the winner is. Oh, boy. This is for the year, okay? Year. I know you like to call me pest control the way I'm bug chasing. But that. That's a good one. But that. But that. Right? You do do that. But that one's out. That one's out of. You know, we. We couldn't. That one didn't make it right. Okay, so. Because this is just too. Too hard. Right? All right, so here's the names. I'm going to read out all seven, and then you got to tell me which one you like the best, okay? All right.

[Giannis Pappas]

All right.

[Chris D]

Barack is a queen because he sucks on big. Sorry. Barack is a queen.

[Giannis Pappas]

Can you read?

[Chris D]

Yeah, I know. Barack is a queen because he sucks on Big Mike's peen. Lot of 14 frozen grapes in my ass, then walk around shitting like a deer.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's a good one.

[Chris D]

My trans cock has surprised more Italians than mount folks. Vesuvius. Oh, okay. Rock hard from Blue Chew. I have to think of my wife's sister to glue. Glue. My dad's a juju. But my mom is not few. Few. Okay. Then we got Muzzy Woman forced to dress as a voting booth but not allowed to vote. Then we got. There were no Leroy's on Epstein's list because Carnival Cruise didn't stop there. Oh, I've seen those. And then we got taken Leroy. So I finally have the strength to leave my family.

[Giannis Pappas]

Oh, man, they're all good.

[Chris D]

I like the deer. Deer one. Deer one. You think you like that? Over my trans has surprised more Italians. And Memphis, that's a good one, too. And you know what? Yeah, that is better. That one's better. So you think out of all those. Okay. Yeah, I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go ginzo. I'm gonna go Italian. You like the Italian one, but you do think in second place is the deer. Frozen grapes in the ass.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

That's a good. That's because something. Something worm would have. Right? Worm. I know you probably have frozen. I. By the way, I told him that we went out to dinner. One of our friends. Friends had a gun. Oh.

[Giannis Pappas]

Oh, boy.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

That he did.

[Chris D]

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

And it's funny because he was the guy.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Least supposed to have a.

[Chris D]

Least supposed to have a gun. Yeah. All right. Cause what are you doing? You at the airport today? Yeah. Cause, you know, I'm just chilling cockpits, you know. How are things? How are things looking out there on the Runway? Cold. Cold, cold. Right. All right, cuz.

[Giannis Pappas]

Safe to fly, though, now.

[Chris D]

Safe to fly. Definitely safe to fly. I got everything under control. That's what it is. It'll fly your plane right into middle Village. Village, cuz. There you go. Right? Yeah. All right. Thank you, bro.

[Giannis Pappas]

You're welcome, man.

[Chris D]

Have a merry Christmas. Merry Christmas, Debo, and Happy Hanukkah. Squeaks. Squeaky. You guys celebrate? What's it, the George Cassandra holiday? Oh, Festivus. Yeah, Squeaktivus. Yeah. All right. Later, bro.

[Giannis Pappas]

Doesn't he have to go because he's got to get to Macy's and get his outfit on.

[Chris D]

Yeah, he does. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

I wasn't confident in that. We're gonna get a couple of opinions.

[Chris D]

Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

We'll call Sergio.

[Chris D]

But he does like Mount Vesuvius and.

[Giannis Pappas]

The deer grape one is good, but I mean, we're. We're overlooking. We're overlooking Leroy and we're looking. Overlooking Carnival Cruise.

[Chris D]

I also did skip double.

[Giannis Pappas]

This is Giannis. You're on history Hyenas. We need your assistance.

[Chris D]

What's up, Giannis? How you doing? Serge is not available. He's taking a shit back. I Help you. This is his girlfriend, Tita.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yo, how you doing, Tita? Here's the problem, Pizza Jerry, your voice is so recognizable. There's really not much you can do to hide it.

[Chris D]

Yeah, yeah, no, you got it twisted, puppy. I'm smoking. So that's why it's a little hoarse right now, but what's up? I can help you, yo.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, the problem is your accent is twisted.

[Chris D]

I'm not a man. I don't got a man's voice, but I will get it twisted.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. The thing with you is your accent is not just New York. You have an accent that's specific to Avenue B. Yeah, it's like one block and.

[Chris D]

And it's specific. Specific. And no matter what, you always have a little bit of a list because your front tooth comes up a little too far.

[Giannis Pappas]

It does.

[Chris D]

The overbite and the upper lip is just a bit too short. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Guys, I tell people all the time, my. My mouth and the teeth and lip is an indication that life is just not fair. Yeah, that's what it is. And I wear it right on my face.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

Okay. One of your tooth is just like a dog door to let the dogs outside. It just flaps up once in a while.

[Chris D]

What can you do? Yo, when I first met my wife, father, he said in Spanish to Liz, he nudged it with his elbow and he said, sergio's mouth looks like two dogs fighting.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yo.

[Chris D]

In Spanish. And you know I don't speak the language right? So I knew something was up because everyone was laughing. I was just sitting there with a stupid close mouth smile. Yeah, like a dick with a little beanie hat on, yo. Like a dick. All right, so here we go.

[Giannis Pappas]

So we need help of picking the. This is the. The ppw, the best Patreon name of the year. We've narrowed it down to about six or seven. So listen to an actual.

[Chris D]

A new name for the Patreon. Yes. From the podcast. You got your naming the. The Patreon.

[Giannis Pappas]

Got it. We're naming the best name for Patreon members. You know, we do the game where we pick the funniest names. So we've narrowed it down to six names for the year. So these are the all time High hall of Famers, and it's just too hard for us, so we had to call a couple of friends. Here they are.

[Chris D]

Okay. Are you ready? Can you hear me?

[Giannis Pappas]

Yes.

[Chris D]

All right. Barack is a queen because he sucks on Big Mike's peen ladder 14. Then we got frozen grapes in my ass. Then Walk around shitting like a deer. We got. All right, then we got My trans. I'm not going to lie. You know, I got the itchy Asshole. Man, a frozen grape might do the job.

[Giannis Pappas]

My.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Then we got. My trans has surprised more Italians. And Mount Vesuvius. Okay, so that's a good one. Then we got surprises. Hilarious. Then we got Rock Hard from Blue Chew. I have to think of my wife's sister to glue. Glue. My dad's a juju, but my mom is not. Few, few. Yo, these are funny. Okay, but that one's okay. Then we got Muzzy Woman forced to dress as a voting booth, but not only allowed to vote. Then we got. There were no Leroy's on Epstein's list because Carnival Cruise didn't stop there. Then we got. Those are all really good. And half of them are highly racist. Yes. And then this is the last one taking Leroy's. So I finally have the strength to leave my family. Oh, man. What do you like so far? What stuck out? I think I like. I like the Muslim one. I like the Muslim voting. Voting booth. Yeah. The voting booth one is fun. I also think that women should be dressed in 3, 4. 3, 4 for cloth because they're very distracting and I'm trying to do work. Yeah, because he's. He's converting to Muslim. He reads the Quran and everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now what do you think? Do you think, out of all them, though, what do you think got the biggest laugh from you? What's. Oh, man. There was another one before that. I'm sorry, my memory is shot too many times. So. Wait, I like the Bodie booth one. Did you laugh? You laughed at the frozen grapes in the ass.

[Giannis Pappas]

Frozen grapes. Yeah.

[Chris D]

And I would say frozen grapes in the ass made me laugh. And I'm also gonna try it. Yes. So this is. This is because we called Debo and he also like frozen grapes in the ass.

[Giannis Pappas]

Okay, we're getting closer, Sergio. Thank you. Love you, brother.

[Chris D]

The fact that you called Debo before me is obscene. But whatever. I mean, it's not like the guy has a job, right? He still lives in the basement.

[Giannis Pappas]

No, no, no. He's a pilot at JetBlue. For sure.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

No, for sure.

[Chris D]

I wasn't. I wasn't sure. I wasn't sure if you're going to pick up the phone if you were busy on a three mile run with the camera too close to your face. Well, Poppy sees between my teeth.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. We love you, brother.

[Chris D]

Love you, man. Later, bro.

[Giannis Pappas]

All right, man.

[Chris D]

Peace. See, he won't say, I love you back. Guys like that can't. It's too gay for them.

[Giannis Pappas]

Too gay?

[Chris D]

Yeah. So I don't know, man. It's very illuminating that two outsiders have said, frozen grapes my ass, and walk around shit like a deer. It also got the biggest laugh from Giannis. Yeah, right. I personally think if it was me, I would have. My trans cock has surprised more Italians in Mount Vesuvius. To me, it's between just those two deer in the Mount Vesuvius. But I don't know. I mean. I mean, my. You know, because this is hard. I just think you can't discount two random people who don't know what the other one said. Both pick deer.

[Giannis Pappas]

You can't. You can't. I think that's a good call. I think we're down to Mount Vesuvius in this.

[Chris D]

I don't think the other one. Right. I mean, what else? Because Mount Vesuvi, the thing is frozen grapes in my ass, then walk around shitting like a deer has made two people outside of this podcast say, that's the one. We've all thought it was the one. And then. But then, on the other hand, my trans cock has surprised more towns. And Mount Vesuvius is one of the names that actually changed the way I think and live because it was so funny. And I couldn't believe how, because it combined history, it combines trans and he's gay. And it was just made me feel like this embodies our show.

[Giannis Pappas]

Right.

[Chris D]

Wow.

[Giannis Pappas]

We got a real problem here. And here's the deal. The winner is getting a free T shirt.

[Chris D]

It's what it is.

[Giannis Pappas]

You are getting a free T shirt.

[Chris D]

So I think the only thing left to do now that it's down to two is we have to call our wives.

[Giannis Pappas]

We gotta call our wives.

[Chris D]

So I'll go first. I'll see if Jasmine will pick up the phone. Yeah, she may not, but I will. See. And then if not, I'm gonna call my mother.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's all we can do. I mean, if you call your mom, that is gold, but I don't recommend you do it.

[Chris D]

Okay, let's see. And then you're gonna have to call.

[Giannis Pappas]

Your wife, because if you call your mom, it might be the funniest thing that ever happened in my life, but it's the worst thing you could probably do for your life.

[Chris D]

Jazz. Hey, listen, you're on History Hyenas right now. This is going to take 30 seconds. Hello? Hello?

[Giannis Pappas]

What?

[Chris D]

Okay. You're on 30 seconds. Okay, just. We're at that. We're at the Patreon name of the year, and we. I'm not going to be on the podcast anymore unless you pay me. Okay, I'm going to pay you. Yeah, I'm going to pay you. I'm going to pay. I'm going to buy you those new chunkletas you want. So. Okay, so here we go. It's down to these two. Is that Josephine? Yes. Okay. One of the names that. One of the names that didn't make it that we cut out the name was Don't Walk Josephine through Frushing Priests. Do you get it? Okay, so here we go. These are the two names. These are the two names, and we just need your opinion. You don't have to like them. Just have to. You know what? What do you think should be the winner? Because we just have to both. It got down to the point where we both have to call our wives. Giannis is going to call Brittany after this, and we just need to get. Hurry. I'm putting bread baskets together. Yes. So we got frozen grapes in my ass, then walk around shitting like a deer. Or my trans cock has surprised more Italians in Mount Vesuvius. That's a tough one. I'll say him again. Frozen grapes in my ass, then walk around shit and like a deer. Or my trans cock has surprised more towns in Mount Vesuvius. Why do they both have to be so gay?

[Giannis Pappas]

Because.

[Chris D]

Because you're. Because, unfortunately, you have two gay men who host the podcast.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah. And maybe should we read a couple alts just in case prefers one of those?

[Chris D]

Okay, so those are the two that are in contention. Just a couple of alts that are just a little bit, you know, not as gay. Cannot see Britney entertaining this. Okay.

[Giannis Pappas]

Probable that that's true.

[Chris D]

Well, we have a couple of alts, just so you know, there were no Leroy's on Epstein's list because Carnival Cruise didn't stop there. Her. Okay. Or. Or Daddy's at work. Or yes, girls, Daddy's at work. Or Muzzy woman forced to dress as a voting booth but not allowed to vote. I kind of like the last one. Muzzy woman forced to dress as a voting booth but not allowed to vote.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, because it's. It's a really good one.

[Chris D]

Yeah, I like that one.

[Giannis Pappas]

And I like the deer everywhere. Deer.

[Chris D]

You're the third person now. Debo said dear and Sergio. Oh, Debo picked it. Now forget it. Oh, okay. All right, Thanks. I know you got to get back to what you're doing. Yeah, thanks for wasting a Minute of my life. Well, I'm here, you know, I'm making the donuts. I'm supporting us, babe. This is what I do. All right? The wrong audience. All right, I love you. Bye.

[Giannis Pappas]

Love you.

[Chris D]

Bye.

[Giannis Pappas]

Just.

[Chris D]

I think you just got to call your wife sometimes.

[Giannis Pappas]

You got to tell the girls, daddy's at work.

[Chris D]

Yeah, Daddy's at work. I call your wife and then.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, let's just gonna see what she has to say. Sometimes you gotta let the kids know Daddy's at work. And Daddy. And Mom. You're having a work conversation. This is just what we do for a living.

[Chris D]

Hello.

[Giannis Pappas]

Hi, babe. You're on history hyenas. Don't panic. Don't panic. Panic, panic. Don't panic. We need help. We're calling a bunch of people and we're trying to figure out the PPW of the year, which is the funniest Patreon name. We have it down to a few. And we need your. We need your help for you to let us know which ones you think are the funniest.

[Chris D]

Oh, God. Okay. Hey, Brittany, that's Chris.

[Giannis Pappas]

This is like call a friend on To Be a Millionaire. So Brittany here, this is to be a fucking retard.

[Chris D]

Yeah. Okay, so Brittany here are the last two names. This is between these two. We just need your honest opinions. Take 30 seconds.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah, we're down to two.

[Chris D]

Okay, so we got. It is between frozen grapes in my ass, then walk around shitting like a deer. Or my trans cock has surprised more Italians in Mount Vesuvius.

[Giannis Pappas]

Oh, my God.

[Chris D]

The first one made me laugh. The deer made you laugh. Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

It is.

[Chris D]

Yes, because. And is it. Is there a slight kind of bias you may have? Because you know, the second one, my trans CoC has surprised more towns in Mount Vesuvius. Could be your husband.

[Giannis Pappas]

It crossed my mind.

[Chris D]

Right. Okay, so Brittany now she's the fourth person. Thank you. Thank you, kids.

[Giannis Pappas]

In the head. Wow. So it's a kind of. It's unanimous at this point.

[Chris D]

Yeah. That the winner. I think that would safe to say now the ppw, the winner of the year. You need to mention. Message us, get us your address. You will get a T shirt. This is a guarantee. Congratulations to whomever you are, wherever you're from. We will mail you a shirt as long as you live in the continental United States. Frozen grapes in my ass, then walk around shitting like a deer. You are the winner. The PPW of the year.

[Giannis Pappas]

I literally. I'm not even joking. I got chills just now down my back because. Listen to this. This is the winner of thousands of entries. Many beasts. Yes, you are the king of kings.

[Chris D]

King of kings.

[Giannis Pappas]

You are, shall I say the Queen Anne. Yes, you fucking are. Top of the food chain. That is. I think that's a bigger feat than my entire career.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

He went up against thousands of fucking names of the year and one. And it was multiple people's opinions.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

You go down as legend now.

[Chris D]

Yeah.

[Giannis Pappas]

I don't know what you're doing. If you're working at sheets, I don't know where you are. Yeah, you know, your stocking shelves. Maybe you're a lawyer, maybe you're a pimp. Maybe you're a sex trafficker. Whatever it is. You also can add this achievement to your curriculum vitae.

[Chris D]

You. I don't know if you're a man, if you're a woman. I don't know. I know that. And I know that you probably already. If you look out your window, there's. There's probably someone standing outside your window right now with a sign that says, you are the ppw. And that person is owes permanence because he mirrored our phones. So that's how you do it. So. So. Yeah, I know.

[Giannis Pappas]

Yeah.

[Chris D]

So. I'm just kidding. But congratulations to you. Congratulations to the ppw.

[Giannis Pappas]

It's.

[Chris D]

It really is. You have to think about the odds that you overcome to win this award.

[Giannis Pappas]

Award crazy.

[Chris D]

It really is. Believe in yourself. For the kids out there listening to the podcast, you can do anything. Because this person is probably just a regular. You know, they probably work in an auto body shop. They listen while they're doing other things. Maybe they work for Amazon. They're driving UPS truck. You don't know. Maybe they're a school teacher showing the history stuff to their kids. You don't know who they are. You don't know where they live. But they are no longer anonymous.

[Giannis Pappas]

That's right.

[Chris D]

Because now. Proudly frozen grapes in my ass then walk around shitting like a deer. You've changed the course of your own life and we salute you. You are the PPW of the year of 2025, the year of Jesus Christ.

[Giannis Pappas]

Anything is possible if you dare to dream big enough. Yes, if you're willing to let. If you're willing to let grapes freeze and stuff them in your ass to shit them back out.

[Chris D]

Yes, you can be a king. You can be a king. And you will get a T shirt on us. We'll sign it. If you would like, please just message us a message to Patreon and we will get that shirt out to you. So congratulations and merry Christmas. Yeah.