Pep talk on Peptides W/ Tank Sinatra | History Hyenas

Summary

History Hyenas: Pep Talk on Peptides w/ Tank Sinatra – Episode Summary

Podcast: History Hyenas
Hosts: Chris Distefano, Yannis Pappas
Guest: Tank Sinatra
Date: April 23, 2026
Episode Theme:
A wild, hilarious fusion of fitness, hormones, longevity science, locker-room banter, and self-improvement wisdom. The hosts pick apart the modern obsession with fitness “hacks,” peptides, steroids, and finding new ways to cheat death—through the personal journey and hard-earned insights of internet meme king and gym beast, Tank Sinatra.

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1. Main Theme & Purpose

The episode explores the intersection of modern male fitness culture, anti-aging therapies (peptides, TRT, steroids), and the psychological game behind getting—and staying—jacked. With guest Tank Sinatra, the guys layer in genuine advice, personal anecdotes, and irreverent humor, creating an episode that’s part “bro-science,” part motivation, part full-on roast.

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2. Key Discussion Points & Insights

A. Tank’s True Identity & Podcast History

• Tank's real name (George), his German heritage, and the playful Nazi/Übermensch banter.
• The Smithtown Water Department joke’s origins and Tank’s recurring role in the "History Hyenas" lexicon.

"Tank’s a Nazi. He does look...would be an übermensch." (03:13, Chris)

B. Fitness, Steroids, Peptides—And the Truth

Tank’s Physique & Journey

• Shirt-off moment: Tank reveals he’s shredded year-round, but says he’s been more ripped in the past during bodybuilding shows and that it didn't feel good (06:32).
• Discussion about body image/dysmorphia even at peak fitness.

TRT, Steroids & Peptide Use – The Real Story

• Tank clarifies a lot of misconceptions:
  • Only did one traditional steroid cycle; been on and off hormone therapy for ~15 years.
  • Uses testosterone (TRT), Primo (Primobolan), and Tirzepatide (Mounjaro).
  • Peptides and GLP-1 agonists (like Ozempic, Mounjaro) are popular, but only work as an addition to a regimen—not as a substitute.
  • Tank engages in regular blood donation to offset TRT's blood-thickening effects.
• Chris and Yannis openly compare labs, cholesterol numbers, and the "science" of nuts shrinking on TRT (13:31).

"It’s a great tool. It’s not a crutch. Same as when I started testosterone—I’d been training naturally for 20 years." (09:14, Tank)

Debunking Fitness Myths

• Myth: Protein must be consumed within an hour post-workout—FALSE (39:04).
• Myth: Three sets of ten is the magic formula—FALSE.
• Instead, go close to failure, slow reps, time under tension.

"The set and rep scheme was put out by the muscle magazines because they needed content. Just get close to failure." (39:07, Tank)

Rest and Recovery

• Tank emphasizes major gains come from rest; systemic recovery is as important as the workout itself.
• Don’t overtrain; two to three days between workouts for the same muscle group advised (21:23).

Real vs. Perceived Risk of Steroid Use

• Most perceived dangers of testosterone and peptides stem from abuse or lack of medical oversight.
• Lyle Alzado story and media moral panic discussed.
• Tank’s message: Minimum effective dose, monitor labs, take health seriously (35:13).

“With these things, minimum effective dose—that’s it. Don’t chase the max, just what works.” (35:13, Tank)

C. Modern Longevity: Peptides, Anti-Aging, and the Quest for 150

• Peptides pitched as major anti-aging tech: Tank believes starting them at the right time could extend lifespan to 150 (33:01).
• Explanation of how oxidation and cell aging work; peptides/antioxidants may reverse or slow aging.
• GLP-1s and peptides like Retatrutide, Mounjaro, BPC-157, MOTS-c—what they do and his experience (33:36).
• Discussion of DEXA scans: Tank lost 22 lbs of fat, only 1 lb of lean mass using tirzepatide; bone density up (32:12).

“If you start [peptides] at the right age, and stick with them—you’re living to 150.” (33:10, Tank)

D. The Pack Gym & Gym Culture

• Tank now co-owns The Pack, a gym focusing on strength, striking, and self-defense (especially for women).
• Hosts rave about gym equipment and the striking-dummy "B.O.B." (18:01).
• Validated research: Men push themselves harder when women are present at the gym; broader discussion on how hot gym-goers affect male motivation (27:48).

"Empirically, men will do more reps with heavier weight if a woman is present." (27:47, Tank)

E. Cumulative Progress & Sustainable Habits

• The “move, don’t overthink” mantra: Don’t seek the perfect plan—just keep moving, working out, committing, resting.
• Tank’s own workout: walking (not obsessively tracking steps), heavy/slow resistance sets, 45 min to 1 hr max workout, 30 years cumulative effect (44:13).

F. Locker Room Banter, Mental Health & Identity Curiosity

• Extended jokes about traps, body image, nuts, mirror flexing, and the psychology behind drive, shame, and over-complication.
• Candid convo on “what if I were Korean?”—the existential itch to “break free” of identity constraints (56:07).
• Poking fun at overanalyzing blood work, fitness envy, and the uniqueness of ethnic body odors (79:22).

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3. Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

• On Peptide Hype:

  “If you’re not open to peptides—bye, you’re going to die at a normal age!” (33:01, Tank Sinatra)

• On Gym Motivation:

  “If I get a hot guy—like Tank—if Tank’s in the gym, I could do a hundred push-ups in a row.” (27:55, Chris)

• On Fitness Overcomplication:

  “Mike, you’re not gonna work there. You got too many questions. So just leave it alone. Or go and find out. I had zero questions.” (20:46, Tank)

• On Longevity:

  “Peptides—if you start them at the right age and you stick with them, you’re living to 150.” (33:10, Tank)

• On Steroid Hysteria:

  “It seems too good to be true, so people talk themselves out of it—‘oh, I’m scared of my heart.’” (34:58, Tank)

• After Shirtless Reveal:

  "Don’t you put that shirt on! ... I’m rock hard right now." (07:06, Chris)

• On Existential Curiosity:

  “Ever wonder what it’s like to be Korean?” (54:31, Chris)

• On Gym Cues from Hot Chicks:

  “They’ve studied it empirically—that men will do more reps with heavier weight if a woman is present.” (27:47, Tank)

• On Rest/Recovery:

  “You can’t bake a cake in half the time by baking it at 800°. You have to give things time to unfold.” (44:33, Tank)

• On Medicalization:

  "TRT is the rebrand of the century... You're on juice. You’re roided up." (61:37, Tank)

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4. Timestamps for Key Segments

• Introduction & Tank’s True Identity – [02:51-03:17]
• Origin of Smithtown Water Joke – [04:50-05:01]
• Tank’s Fitness Journey & Shirtless Segment – [06:32-07:14]
• TRT & Peptides Explained, Donation/Bloodwork – [08:40-10:16]
• Gym Culture, Rest, Avoiding Overcomplication – [19:51-22:13]
• Detailed Gym Routine & Principles – [39:04-44:19]
• Peptides, GLP-1s, Longevity Claims – [32:12-33:36]
• Peptides vs. Traditional Steroids, Health Risks – [35:13-36:54, 66:55-68:59]
• Fencing & Homeowner Banter – [49:07-51:50]
• Locker Room: Shame & Shirtlessness – [72:14-73:37]
• Identity Curiosity (“What if I was Korean?”) – [54:31-57:20]
• Hyperbaric Chamber and Feeling Trapped – [57:28-58:34]

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5. Tone & Style

• Raw, unfiltered, high-energy “bro-medy.”
• Frequent and irreverent humor about sex, body image, race, and masculinity.
• Beneath the joking, surprisingly thoughtful about fitness science and self-improvement.
• “No judgment” approach—encouraging sustainable fitness, curiosity, and self-acceptance for listeners.

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6. Takeaways

• Maximum health is about consistency, balance, and simple, habitual action—not chasing extremes.
• Fitness "biohacking" tools (like peptides or TRT) can help, but are useless (or harmful) without fundamentals.
• Danger and stigma about modern therapies is often overblown/incorrect; seek medical supervision, start low, and monitor.
• The gym is as much about mental health, identity, and social motivation as about muscles.
• Being jacked isn’t a panacea; even at peak fitness, people still wrangle with shame, self-image, and restlessness.

“Some things you got, some things you don't.” (72:50, Tank)

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Ideal For:
Anyone interested in fitness culture, anti-aging, men’s health, and self-improvement—with a strong stomach for off-color jokes and wild conversational tangents.

Endnote:
For more madness, bonus episodes, and to join the “matriarchy,” check out their Patreon.

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Compiled by Podcast Summary AI – keeping you jacked, informed, and entertained.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

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[A]

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[B]

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[A]

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[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Right?

[A]

A lot of $14.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

This is.

[B]

Listen, if you work it with your hands.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

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[A]

All right, cuz we got a great episode with Tank Sinatra. He takes his shirt off. You're going to want to get horned up for this one. You're going to need to flog your log. I need you to come in with your nuts empty because the kid takes a shirt off, we pinch his nipples. Come see me ChrisDComedy.com. every Thursday at New York Comedy Club, 6 and 8:30pm shows, New York City working on new material. Check it out.

[B]

Yeah, see me in west nyack this weekend, April 24th through the 26th. West Nyack, New York. Then see me in Emmaus, Pennsylvania. May 2nd, Atlantic City, June 26th, 27th, East Hampton. July 8th, New Brunswick, New Jersey, July 17th and 18th. And then the Punchline in Philly. August 14th and 15th. And August 21st through the 23rd, I'll be in Austin, Texas. Patreon.comhistory HYENAS TO JOIN the matriarchy and listen to our weekly bonus episode.

[A]

We have a great Patreon up right now. We went wild. What's up, everybody? Welcome to another episode of History Hyenas. I'm Chris Estefano, AKA Chrissy Clomiphene. With me as always, Giannis Pappas, AKA Yanni the Clowney. And now we have a very special guest, the man who coined the term Smithtown Water Department Shout out Smithtown.

[B]

Water.

[A]

Mr. Tank Sinatra, everyone. Tank Sinatra. Nobody knows his real name. Is your name.

[B]

Is your real name like Marty?

[A]

No.

[B]

What is it?

[C]

It's Marty.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. You didn't know that?

[B]

That was a guess.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

It's not Marty, right?

[C]

No.

[A]

What is George. He is German.

[B]

George.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

George and Schweizer.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Tank's a Nazi.

[B]

He does look.

[A]

I mean, he sort way.

[B]

Yeah. It looks like I just crashed, like the beginning of a Nazi neo Nazi party.

[A]

Tank would be an ubermensch.

[B]

Both of you guys.

[C]

I would have no problem. Yeah, Yeah.

[B]

I remember being like Hitler's bodyguards.

[C]

12, 13. Learning about it and being like. Yeah, like that guy in the airport.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Getting asked about ice.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

We was like, they're not bothering me.

[A]

Yeah, it's bothering me. Just trying to get to my fucking. I'm trying to get to Bahamas. Whatever he said,

[C]

it's been seven years. I looked it up on my way. Seven years fucking years.

[A]

Because you came on in the First Reich. You came on twice, you came on once.

[C]

First Reich.

[A]

That's what we call the first. You say. Because you came on and then you brought on. Remember there was the guy, he was like the vegan guy. Oh, he was like a fighter. James Wilkins. Where's he now?

[C]

James Wilkes or Wilkins?

[A]

What the hell is he doing? He's just not in my algorithm.

[C]

Yeah, he's just eating. Eating plants.

[A]

Is he still big? Like, Like a huge. Like, he was big on socials.

[C]

Oh, okay. No, there was the Game Changers documentary that really, like, put him out there. And then.

[A]

Game Changers.

[C]

Game Changers. And then it kind of faded away.

[B]

I remember that episode. You were like a little saucy with that.

[A]

Yeah. And he was getting mad because I said, I asked him if I can nibble on his cauliflower ear. Does that count as vegetables? And he didn't laugh.

[B]

Yeah. Really?

[A]

And he got really upset. And then you were looking at me like this.

[C]

I said that to you?

[A]

Well, I remember you kind of. I looked over at you.

[B]

No, you weren't there.

[A]

Yes, he was. He was in the room.

[B]

No, he wasn't.

[A]

Yes, he was. Yeah, in the old studio. Yeah.

[C]

Interesting.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I didn't remember originally where the Smith tower water thing came until you remind me. And it happened on the Tank Sinatra episode.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That's a big part. That's like a big part of the lexicon.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

The game changer.

[A]

We have merch off it. Yeah. We should be giving Tank. Yeah.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Yeah, dude. Nick, get ready. Do You? Yeah.

[B]

I thought the second layer was coming off.

[A]

It will. Yeah. Because he times it layer by layer.

[B]

The thing is, he could wear his body like a shirt.

[C]

It's still hot.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Holy shit.

[C]

Shout out Smithtown Water dog.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Nick, your body looks painted on.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Look at that, Nick, how's your cholesterol now?

[B]

Got a body that's made for porn.

[C]

Yeah, I'm so. I'm.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Would you do porn if you had a to match?

[C]

I'm all right. It wouldn't be like, what is this guy doing here? But I wouldn't be like, famous dude.

[A]

Think about how terrifying it would be with a guy with a body like that. And he's the same guy, except he was wearing a turban. Like he was. How insanely terrifying would that be? And you just walked around with mom Donnie.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And you had a huge beard.

[C]

That would be sick.

[A]

That would be sick, dude. But he's got Jesus Christ on his chest. Yeah.

[B]

Big time. Jesus Christ.

[A]

Now what? Did you work out this morning?

[C]

No, I didn't. I actually.

[A]

No, no, don't put it back on.

[C]

I'm actually a little upset because I wanted to get here early and do push ups or pull ups on some scaffolding.

[A]

Right.

[C]

And I didn't get to.

[B]

Well.

[A]

Yeah, but I'm. I'm zero pump, but still looks pretty good to me.

[B]

So that's zero pump.

[C]

Zero pump.

[A]

Is this the most shredded you've been in your life right now?

[C]

No, I did two bodybuilding shows and I was like a little bit more ripped, but not. Not much. And I felt like shit.

[A]

Right.

[B]

So what is a little bit more rip? What does that mean? Like, what does that mean to a guy that's fucking shredded? Yeah, like you have a little body dysmorphia. Because I can't see how you could get any more shredded. I can see.

[C]

No, no, no.

[B]

When I could climb up to your tits from your belly button, I. To. Yeah, I could use your abs as a ladder to come and kiss you on the top of the head. How much more?

[A]

Don't you put that shirt on.

[C]

Yeah, I gotta. I gotta. I gotta put it on for a second.

[A]

You scumbag.

[C]

I gotta.

[B]

Now you go a little.

[A]

You get a tingle a little bit. Now tangle. I'm rock hard right now.

[C]

Rock hard.

[A]

You know, the last.

[C]

Last time I was here, Chris ruined my life.

[A]

I don't know what happened. I don't remember.

[C]

We were doing the Cyclopedia podcast.

[A]

Yes. Rip.

[B]

I was about to say did he sell your house?

[C]

No. So he halfway through the episode, he goes, out of nowhere, he goes, hold on a second. You guys split this equally, like, even, like, the finances are 50. 50. And he just went on about how she does all the work and I don't do it.

[A]

His podcast partner on Quespita, she did all the work.

[C]

All the work.

[A]

She, like, she did. Researched everything.

[B]

Oh, you had a podcast.

[A]

I remember that she did. And then so I was just like, how is this 50, 50 when she's doing all the work and he' showing up and being hot? Oh, wow. Yeah.

[C]

Well, I was show. I was adding an element of, you know, lightness to it. Right. So dark.

[B]

You basically called him Vanna White on the show.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Just messing around. I was just doing a bit.

[B]

He said, you're giving the eye candy 50% of this money.

[C]

But it stuck.

[A]

But it's stuck.

[C]

And it's all right, though. She's. She's doing fine. And I was.

[B]

So she complained to you?

[A]

She.

[B]

After that, she was.

[C]

No, no, no, no, no. We never talked about it again. But it was always.

[A]

But you could put it. You could. I. I guess like a little, like, in the glass started to, like, split little by little by now. Can you tell us what's your regimen? What are we on now? I want to know the peptides. I want to know the anabolic steroids. What? Lay it out for us. What's the cocktail?

[C]

Okay, so I've always been big.

[A]

But you've also been on steroids for 20 years. No, on and off.

[C]

No, I started. Well, wait, how the fuck am I 15? 15 years.

[A]

15 years, on and off.

[C]

I've done one cycle. One cycle?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Testosterone.

[A]

Trt.

[C]

Primo.

[A]

Right.

[C]

Tirzepatide.

[A]

Which is Mounjaro.

[C]

Mounjaro.

[A]

So that's what. See, remember I was telling you, a lot of people think, oh, mounjaro is just for big fatties, but look at how ripped he is on Mounjaro.

[C]

It's a great tool. It's not a crutch. It can't be a crutch. No, it's a great add on to somebody who's already doing the right thing. Same thing as when I started testosterone. Like, I had been training naturally for 20 years.

[A]

And was your testosterone that low? It was.

[C]

You know what? I. I didn't get baseline blood work, right? So I just. I got blood work done, and it was. It was shot. It was like 280. Yeah, like that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What age is this?

[C]

30, 33.

[A]

And the only thing with testosterone is TRT. If you, if you boys and girls are taking it out there, you got to give blood. Was it once a month?

[C]

Got to give blood once. You can't do it once a month.

[A]

What do you do?

[C]

Earliest is 56 days for whole blood.

[A]

So you gotta do. So every three months. Give blood.

[C]

You gotta give blood or you're gonna.

[A]

Are you gonna have a stroke?

[C]

You gotta exercise, you gotta eat right. And you gotta get rid of blood. Which by the way, there's a theory that women live longer because they lose blood every month. So even if you're a man not on testosterone, you need to be donate your blood.

[A]

It's actually healthy for you, it's great for you.

[C]

You get a whole new pint of blood out of nowhere. Your body makes it for you.

[B]

Interesting.

[A]

Are you good at reading lab numbers? Like, could you. Oh, you couldn't because we want. Because Nick brought in his blood work results and I. And it just says, you know, that his cholesterol is a little high.

[C]

I'll take a look at it.

[A]

But then he has the free testosterone and those numbers because it seems to indicate he's a woman.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So I didn't know that it would be good. It is good thing to donate.

[A]

Donate blood and look at. If you want to look like Tank Sinatra, just donate your blood so that

[C]

you rejuvenate to me.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. And then you also get confirmation you don't have aids. Every three months.

[C]

Yeah, pretty much.

[B]

Do you think that is the sale that the celebrities make to the parents of the kids who are desperate enough to sell their children's blood?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Saying this is good for them anyway. To clean them out every couple days.

[A]

Yes, I think so.

[C]

I wish I had access to baby's blood.

[A]

It'll be fucking great.

[C]

Yeah, I have no idea what I'm looking so.

[A]

Right now. Okay, sorry. Sorry, Nick.

[B]

Well, unfortunately it's in Spanish because he went to Pathmark to get it done.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So could you imagine going to get

[A]

your blood done at Pathmark?

[B]

El Pablo muchacho. Nicholas Monroy.

[C]

Yeah, I. I grew up De niro, dude.

[A]

A patch mark. Well, here's the one thing. His cholesterol.

[B]

Cholesterol's.

[A]

His cholesterol is 218. But he's got low. It's not terrible. He's got high LDLs, but he's got. Also got. He's got low good cholesterol.

[C]

Ldl. Yeah.

[A]

So you need the high.

[C]

But he's not that low. He's 39.

[A]

You need the high HDL now the TSH. TSH, FT4, that, that. You look at that, right? You like the TSH number. That's the free testosterone, isn't it?

[C]

What is it at?

[A]

It's at 1.97.

[C]

I don't know. I'm not. I don't know if TSH is free testosterone. Yeah, I thought that might be something. I feel like the T stands for something and it's something stimulating hormone.

[A]

Right, right. Because that's the thing is you can have good testosterone, but if your free testosterone is not right, then your body can't use the testosterone to where it needs to go.

[C]

Yeah, you got to do it all.

[A]

Like my, my blood work. The doctor said my testosterone wasn't that bad. It was like 690.

[C]

That's good.

[A]

But my free testosterone was. Whatever the number of my free testosterone was, whatever the problem is, it was causing me to be very, very like. Basically it was like all your testosterone, your body is just going to your cum. Everything's going to your sperm and to your cum. That's why you're so. You're so fertile. You can have. You can make babies like this, but because of that, you then can't get jacked. So we're have to turn it off from going to the babies. And your nuts will shrink. But then you'll get jacked.

[C]

There's something about semen retention. Some people go a little nuts with it. But if you think about how much energy it must take your body to create the potential for life, to replenish what you just busted out. It's not saliva. It's like all that, everything you would need to create a whole human being just blasted into the toilet.

[A]

Do you think Nick and I aren't jacked because we jerk off too much?

[C]

Who's Nick?

[A]

That's Nick.

[C]

Do you jerk off a lot?

[B]

Yeah, I dabble. But they say you're supposed to do that to keep the prostrate. You want to keep the prostate strong.

[C]

Well, like, like Tank is on propaganda.

[B]

That's propaganda.

[A]

Right. So Tank. Tank is on trt. So he has no, he has very small nuts. Right. Your nuts shrink.

[B]

You're.

[C]

Yeah. You get gonadal atrophy.

[A]

Have you noticed that your nuts are smaller on trt?

[C]

Yeah, I'm sure. I was never a big balls guy.

[A]

Really? You don't know. You look like a guy who had big balls.

[B]

Now when they shrink, the sack stays the same size though, right? So does it look like a change purse?

[C]

A change purse?

[B]

Like, does it look like you carrying.

[C]

I. I can. I can show you. You know what I mean?

[A]

I like to see your assessment. Would you pull them out? Not your penis. Would you just put your nuts out through your zipper for us and put it in this water?

[C]

I don't know.

[B]

You got a chicken skin hanging out that. You get bat wings a lot.

[C]

It's like any regular sex. Sometimes it's tight, sometimes it's loose.

[B]

Right. I hate when it's lo.

[C]

What?

[A]

What? Like when it's tight because we've been.

[B]

I want to get a ball lift.

[A]

You want to get a ball? I need. That'd be funny to get a ball. Yeah.

[B]

Because what I got to do when I sleep on my side is I got to pull my sack out from between my fat legs.

[A]

Now, Giannis looks like shit, right?

[C]

Yeah, Giannis is fine, dude. Yo, so I. Sorry to interrupt. I know.

[B]

Go ahead, go ahead.

[C]

I did my reading today from. Oh, yeah, around the Year with Emmet Fox. April 13th. Okay.

[A]

Tanko, essentially, his readings.

[C]

I don't know how you.

[B]

Readings.

[C]

I don't know how. You don't believe in God.

[A]

He reads so much. Tank. He's very. Well, I believe in God.

[C]

I'm saying, like the proverbial. You like how anybody. How many coincidences do you need?

[A]

Exactly.

[C]

So you know what today's is? You know what today's reading is?

[A]

Tell me.

[C]

Get back on the beam.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Sounds like God listens to the history hyenas.

[A]

Because Tank was the one who sent me the initial thing about being on the beam, and that's what I mean.

[C]

And do you remember what it was it was about? It's not a balance beam.

[A]

No. It's about being in God's light and love and presence.

[C]

Well, today's most commercial flying is done on a radio beam. So the beam is what they. What they follow while they're flying. And when you're on the beam, you don't have to worry about asteroids or other planes or whatever. You're just. You're in. You're on the beam so you're safe.

[A]

Right?

[B]

Right.

[C]

So when you get off the beam, sometimes you get, you know, some. Some danger being a danger zone, like flying to a mountain or something.

[A]

Right? Yeah.

[C]

Try and take the flight into your own hands, AKA take your will back.

[A]

Right. And that's what we had said when we brought it in. That, See, this is Tank is a huge part of this podcast. Not only Smithtown water during the First Reich, but in the Second Reich, the beam. The beam being on and off the Beam was such a huge part of the show for months and months and months. And Tank is the one who brought

[C]

us in the program.

[A]

In the program.

[B]

The program's another one.

[A]

Yeah, in the program, I'm on the beam and in the program.

[C]

Right, You're Fuck. Yeah. You know what you used to call that?

[A]

Yeah. And you're off the beam and out of the program.

[C]

You guys used to call that screwed in. That was from my stepped in episode. You called me screwed in. It made me feel so good.

[A]

You're screwed in because you have a yarmul screwed in tight.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You're a good businessman. You're doing even this knuckle therapy. This is for your new gym, the Pack.

[C]

The Pack.

[A]

Yeah, the Pack. Which is.

[B]

Which is now.

[A]

Is this operated by.

[C]

By the way, I thought that was Joey Kamasta.

[A]

It could very well be. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Joey Kamasa. That was before he got his hair plugs.

[C]

Yeah. So funny.

[B]

So wait.

[C]

Chris, you look great.

[A]

Thank you. Yeah, yeah. Franks and beans.

[B]

So is this Jim on the island

[A]

notice fucking a few blocks from here.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

23rd in between 5th and 6th.

[A]

And it's owned by the man who created Rumble Boxing, Noah.

[C]

Noah Neiman.

[A]

Yeah. Noah Neiman. Who's an amazing jacked, beautiful man. Go follow him on Instagram. Because he doesn't have a lot of followers and he should.

[C]

And he. He's sensitive.

[A]

He. I don't know why that Guy doesn't have 3 million followers. He's got like 70,000 followers. Like, my mom has more followers than him. But he puts out good content and he's hot. Jacked and ripped.

[B]

Noah.

[C]

Noah Neiman.

[A]

Noah Neiman. I've been following him for years. He's a good friend.

[C]

So he was the founder of Rumble with Andy Stenzler. Right. And he's just. He's. You talk about screwed in. That guy is fucking. I mean, into the culture, into the zeitgeist.

[A]

He's an amazing follow.

[C]

He knows.

[B]

Who's he jacked?

[A]

He's jacked, ripped, shredded. He. This. Is he single?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So I'm sure he has mutual female friends.

[C]

Sure, sure.

[A]

He has many female friends. I mean.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Numerous. Numerous. Yes.

[B]

He cleans up big.

[A]

I mean, that's one of the most handsome kids I've ever seen.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And ripped, shredded. And a great businessman and only has and doesn't have 100,000 followers and I

[C]

don't know, fun hang.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And rich.

[A]

And rich. And so.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So that. Because that Rumble Boxing became big.

[C]

Huge.

[A]

It's huge. And it's fun. And the pack is very similar. Right. Is better, but it's still boxing.

[B]

It's.

[C]

It's striking, endurance, strength. So the striking is. You know what a bob is? The punching bag that looks like me. No, no.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. That looks like a German military. He looks like he's in the fucking Luftwaffe.

[C]

It's like the punching bag that looks like a guy.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Okay. So you. You strike that.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

But then we teach self defense. He started it to honor his dog who passed away and to give women essentially, a chance on the streets. Like New York City's not getting any safer. Right, right. 90% of women have no idea how to throw a punch.

[A]

Right.

[C]

So that's why you hit the guy.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Because he met a jaw or eyes or nose or throat.

[A]

Here. The video that you sent me of you. Of you punching it. I'll. We'll send. I'll send to the group right now. Oh, yeah, because Tank's got great, great hand, eye, see? Oh, yeah, yeah. Here, we'll send it. We'll. We'll throw this up where Tank's just shirtless. And there was a. This angle. This is me laying on the floor with my tongue out.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So teaching girls how to hit.

[A]

Yeah. Now does that. What about that? Is that. Does that body need peptides?

[B]

That need peptides there?

[A]

No, go up, scroll. Jesse, what about that? What can the pack do with a man? With a human? Like that human? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

We'll get them in shape.

[A]

Yeah, I'm using.

[B]

Those are Jessie May's hair extensions.

[A]

Yeah, that's Giannis's ex girlfriend.

[C]

Wait, is that you, Yanis?

[A]

That is Giannis.

[C]

From when?

[A]

Last week,

[B]

maybe 2000.

[C]

You're not you. I figured you'd be covered in hair.

[B]

No, I'm not that hairy.

[A]

I'm for Greek, right?

[B]

Yeah, for Greek. I'm not as hairy as you think now.

[A]

Okay, so what else? So we got Triazepatide. What do you think? Cause we wanted to talk about anabolic steroid use. We want to talk about peptides. I said, you're the one who taught me. And I'm just following this program now, that really, one of the keys to getting jacked is lifting heavy and resting. A lot of people don't rest.

[C]

They overdo it. They get addicted. And they think if they miss a moment in the gym or do one rep wrong, then it's. The whole workout's toast.

[A]

Hank's whole thing and what he's told me, and it's so true, is just move he's like, you're overthinking. What's the perfect squat? Quad exercise? What's the perfect squat? He's like, just go in and work out. Just start working out and the rest will fall. And he's right.

[C]

And the story I told you was I was going to work at this restaurant, which was right down the street from a restaurant that I worked at for, like, five years. They were. It was fine. The whole thing was fine. But certain other waiters were, like, peeking in and seeing, like, what was going on. I think this guy particularly was spying. Spying? He's Russian. Yeah, he's Russian.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So I come back from the orientation, and he's drilling me with questions. He says he wants to work there. He didn't make it to the orientation. What's the uniform? What's the call time? What's the menu? What's the side work? What's this? What's that?

[A]

What's his name? James Mattern.

[C]

Kgb.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Yeah. And. And I said to him, I go, mike, you're not gonna work there. Like, I know you're not gonna work there. You got too many questions.

[A]

Right?

[C]

So just leave it alone.

[A]

Right.

[C]

Or go and find out. But I said I had zero questions. I didn't give a fuck what the uniform was, what time I had to be there. I just wanted to go experience it. Because it was a really, like, hot restaurant on the water in Huntington.

[A]

Right.

[B]

That's odd that he would ask a lot of questions about restaurant work.

[C]

That's why I think he was spying for sure for the manager. Because he was very close with the manager at this.

[A]

But how does that apply to working out?

[C]

Somebody asking me the same questions over and over again.

[A]

Yeah. When it's like, just do it.

[C]

Just go.

[A]

Just do it.

[C]

Just go. And give you, especially at our age, give the body a break. Because you go in, you destroy the muscle, and it's systemic recovery. So if you go in and rip your back apart on Tuesday, and then you go do legs on Wednesday, like, the body doesn't know where to send the resources. You gotta give it like, two, three days in between workouts.

[A]

So what's your typical workout routine? People are gonna wanna know, seeing no shirt on, whether fans gonna wanna know. We got a lot of fatties listening to this pod.

[C]

Okay, so I walk a lot, right.

[A]

10,000 steps a day, minimum, seven days a week.

[C]

I don't track it. I just try and, like, move as much as possible. Cause I used to track it. And I would get nuts about it if I Had nine steps. I go downstairs and fucking get on the treadmill and 10,001. Do you do it by time by like instinct, like awareness? Just being aware of the fact that okay, I've been sitting for an hour, I gotta get up and move a little bit.

[B]

Because the problem is with suburban living is you have to plan, you gotta go. So where do you walk when you're in the suburb?

[C]

My block is not great. My neighborhood is not great for walking because I'm on a court off a main road. So I.

[A]

We'll get the [e-mail] historyhanginess I can

[C]

walk up and down the the blocks but I got a treadmill in the house.

[A]

So that's what you do most of your walking even on a beautiful day. You won't get outside, you'll just walk

[C]

on the treadmill most of the time, Yes. I was just about to try and make it seem like I, I get out there. Like most of the time it's just easier to go downstairs.

[A]

Will it be on an incline, the treadmill?

[C]

No, it's one of those assault treadmills. So it's just like curved.

[A]

Right. So those are, are those the best ones? The assault treadmill?

[C]

I like them is because it's, it's

[A]

self propelled and you don't run on it ever. Really. You're mostly walking on it.

[C]

Yeah. But I also have an assault bike.

[A]

I love the assault bikes which is

[C]

part of the pack also.

[A]

Yes. Assault bikes are I think the best piece of cardio equipment. Cuz Mizzen and Main, I got a couple of those shirts. Getting summer ready, getting peptides ready. Mizzen and Main makes the classic menswear with performance fabric so you can look sharp and feel great all day long. No compromises cuz it also hide some tits.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You know when I decided that I want to start dressing like an adult on certain days I want to dress like an adult. I go to Mizzen in Maine and I get beautiful performance fabric dress shirts.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And they're just absolutely gorgeous. And their pants look refined. Yeah, yeah, they're yet they're stretchy, they're lightweight moisture wicking. Which is big for me because I constantly have swamp ass. Yeah.

[A]

Cause you're a leaky Greek.

[B]

I'm a leaky Greek.

[A]

And here's something really special. Mizzen Maine is doing a veteran led organization. Because it's a veteran led organization, they're committed to supporting those who've served. They offer a year round military discount and proudly give back to veteran Organizations and that's beautiful. So arm servicemen and women. Thank you. My question is, is, will I get a discount because I'm in the army of God?

[B]

That's right. I think you might.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, a lot of guys are lazy too. What's great about it is it's moisture wicking, lightweight, wrinkle resistant. I love that. I don't got to iron it.

[A]

Yeah, because why not? Kids that are going to iron anything.

[C]

No.

[B]

And also you can wash it. It's completely machine washable, which I love

[A]

that because I'm always shrinking my shirts and even when I send my laundry out, these fuckers shrink my shirts.

[B]

You gotta check out the clothes at Mizzen in Maine. Just go take a peek. Right now, Mizzen and Main is offering our listeners 20% off your first purchase at mizzenandmain.com promo code HYENAS20.

[A]

That's Mizzen spelled M I Z Z E N and Main m a I n.com promo code HYENAS20 for 20% off. And also if you'd rather shop in person, you could find Mizzen in Main stores in select states. Go to Mizzen and made. Ooh.

[B]

Cuz I got three of these in my house. No lie. Yeah, I save on toilet paper. And most importantly, I power wash my smashed bean. And every single day. Because you got to get the poop out of the crevices in your starfish, guys.

[A]

Now let me ask you this, because I'm not a handy guy. Do I have to hire like a real man to install the tushy or can guys like us even do it?

[B]

I think your wife will be able to do it, no problem, right? Yeah, it's very easy and user friendly.

[A]

Yeah. Because I have my tushy sitting next to my toilet seat because I'm scared to put it on. I don't know how to connect it.

[B]

I had my wife connect all three of them.

[A]

It's just what it is.

[B]

It's very easy. Yeah, it connects. Your toilet bowl. It's a bidet that washes your, your, your, your back door. You're too hole.

[A]

You power wash your asshole every time.

[B]

Yeah, every time. You save so much on toilet paper, you just, you know, I use the tushy. I swear to God, I got three tushies in my house. Three in my. And you just power wash your butt, Right? And then you just take a little piece of toilet paper and just dry it.

[A]

Dry it. Yeah, it's clean.

[B]

It's squeaky clean.

[A]

You ever power wash Your balls.

[B]

Yes. Up to your head. What I'll do is I'll ride up and let it hit the taint. And that's just for pleasure.

[A]

That's just for pleasure. That's fun. So the tushy bidet. Two in one benefits. Reducing irritation and preventing micro tears from. With soothing water instead of scratchy toilet paper or damaging wet wipes. Now this is good for my father because he has anal fissures.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

So probably from wiping too hard because he was. He would wipe his ass with lotto tickets.

[B]

Yes, yes. But also a lot of times when he was straining for the horse that he is straining going, come on, come on, come on. Sometimes that hurts your butt.

[A]

Yeah. It's what it is. So no more wasting money on something that does an inferior job cleaning your body. No more clogged toilet tushy. You make the switch, you save up to 80% less toilet paper. Make going to the bathroom the most comfortable thing you do all day. For a limited time, our listeners get 10% off their first bidet order. When you use code hyenas at checkout, that's 10% off your first bidet order at hellotushy.com promo code HYENAS. Show us those assholes.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Let me just say there's no reason not to get a tushy bidet.

[A]

It really is awesome.

[B]

It's so easy to put on your toilet and then from there on in you'll have a one. Especially from our podcast and what we advocate for for you will have a 100 clean ass daily.

[A]

It's what it is.

[C]

The so between. Obviously the peptides help, but the so I was in good shape before I became an owner of the pack, but once I. I became. I got in and then I started training there. Like it's. I'm in there once a week and it's changed my entire.

[A]

You've lost all that. Yeah.

[B]

How are the tricks in there? A lot of girls coming to work out.

[C]

I don't even pay attention to that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

No, they're hot.

[C]

No. You're a single guy in New York City and you're not training there. You're a fucking idiot.

[B]

But I'm not single. It's nice to just have it around. And I always feel like I work out longer if there's hot chicks.

[C]

Well, they've studied it.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Empirically. That men will do more reps with heavier weight if a woman is in the pre.

[B]

Without a doubt.

[A]

Sure. I mean, you just get stronger now you do that.

[B]

If there's hot guys in there.

[A]

That's what I do. Yeah. Yeah. If I get a hot guy. Like if Tank, you know, like, like, I guarantee I was feeling really, really tired, but once Tank took his shirt off, I could probably have done 100 push ups in a row. Yeah. And just done it.

[B]

Now, the thing about you is.

[A]

What's the thing about.

[B]

The thing about you is. That's true though.

[A]

That's.

[B]

And I don't know what that is the truth. Cause you're a straight, manly man. But I do know that if there were women in the gym, you wouldn't care.

[A]

I wouldn't care.

[B]

But if Tank Sinatra was in there and ripped, you'd be looking over at him and you want him to make sure that he saw that you were doing a hard workout.

[A]

Why do you think? Why do you think? Why do you think I fluffed my hair today? I came in with my hair as high as it could possibly be. Because I'm peacocking for 10. I had to. I said I went to go pee, but I knew he was gonna do the bit where he took his shirt off. So I went in the shower. I went in the bathroom and jerked off. Cause I couldn't be in fully loaded. Cuz I would have come on the screens and Jesse would have to reset.

[B]

What about this as a business idea after this?

[A]

What about you're fat? Yeah, I'm a fat kid.

[B]

What about this? What. How about this idea, right? Like an outside gym, right? So you get.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You get all the women or whatever, all the people who want to walk or run or whatever. And we take a bus and we just drop them off in horrible neighborhoods and say do five miles. Because then you could do interval training, like sprints, chased.

[A]

Sure.

[C]

Catch your breath.

[B]

That's a good way to work out.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I fantasize about launching a service where you get kidnapped and put in like a cage.

[B]

I love it.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

So you get starved and then you come out, you're 25, 30 pounds lighter.

[A]

Right.

[C]

Your family's devastated, they don't know where you are. But you come back and they're like, you look good.

[A]

You look good. You shredded.

[C]

We were, we were sad, but I mean, yeah. Is number.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Now because I just had the flu and I'm. I dropped a few and I'm still fat.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So.

[A]

No, but you look good. I told you, you look good. But these jeans you're wearing today are holding on. Are these a little tight, Tom? A little tight? Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

See, he's a little tight. Tight. He's A little tight at the leg. Yeah. What. What's the waist? Turn around, let me see.

[B]

32, buddy.

[A]

Wow. That's pretty good. See, I can't. I can't get Buddy.

[B]

Wow. Reading the week I just went down into him and I got a stomach,

[A]

but that's still amazing. You're 32.

[C]

32 is crazy. I went.

[A]

Not 32, 36.

[C]

No. So I was size 38 waist, which is why I fell in love with you, obviously. Remember where I was at then? I was 36. I'm still very comfortable in a 36, but they're big. 34 is big now, right? Because I haven't bought new jeans in years.

[A]

Well, because you. When you started taking the trizepatide, you told me you lost something like £30. Oh.

[C]

Oh. So I want to tell you about this. Yes, I want to tell your listeners. I want to tell you. I want to tell you.

[A]

This is not medical advice, though, right?

[C]

No, it is.

[A]

Okay, great.

[C]

Yeah. So there's a theory or there's some evidence to suggest that when you take a GLP1, 2, or 3. GLP1 is ozempic, GLP2 is tirzepatide, GLP3 is red is true. Tide.

[A]

Retta, whole. Another level that you're going to take it one day. Retta.

[C]

Yeah, I'm going to. Yeah. That you lose more lean mass than fat and that your bone density plummets. So I went for a DEXA fit. DEXA scan.

[A]

Tell us what that is.

[C]

DEXA scan is when you get.

[A]

It's.

[C]

It's really for body fat. So it's like the most accurate body fat reading except for water, but, like, they don't exist. You can't find them. It gives you your bone density. It gives you lean mass. What body fat do you think I am?

[A]

If I had to guess, Just taking the shirt off. Now, understand that when you took your shirt off, my vision blurred a little bit, and I almost felt like I was gonna pass out. But I would still say you're at. If I had to guess, 9%.

[C]

12.

[A]

12. Okay.

[B]

Which feels that I must be at, like, 1400.

[A]

Yeah. What is Giannis in that picture? A picture with Giannis with Jessie May's wig on. What body fat percentage that. Is that in the high 20s?

[B]

I must be for now.

[C]

What is that there in the 30s for sure?

[A]

That's in the 30s, right?

[C]

Well, first of all, body fat, it's

[B]

disgusting to look at.

[A]

It's just. It's actually disgusting. It's another. It's another word. I like to call disturbing.

[C]

Well, I mean, you're also wearing a wig.

[A]

It doesn't help his girlfriend's hair extensions, what he's wearing, so he had to clip those in.

[B]

Yeah, we're just not normal kids.

[A]

We're not normal kids. We're tilted birds.

[B]

We're a couple of tilted birds.

[C]

So. So I lost. I lost 22 pounds of fat from the. My last scan.

[A]

And how and when was the last scan? Scan?

[C]

Like a year ago.

[A]

And that's when you started tirzepatide?

[C]

No, I started tirzepatide two years ago.

[A]

Okay, but.

[C]

So I lost 22 pounds of fat and 1 pound of lean mass.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

Which is. I don't even know if you could do that without the glp. Like, it's just, it's, it's wild.

[A]

As Eric Adams said, all my haters become my waiters. That's what you proved.

[C]

Exactly.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And bone density through the fucking. Through the roof.

[A]

Because your resistance trip training.

[C]

Yeah, I guess. Like, like I said, it's a good tool.

[A]

This is a tool. That's the thing.

[B]

Interesting.

[A]

That's the thing I've been telling Yanni about Pepe.

[C]

No, like no other.

[A]

You still have to work out and eat. Right. You're good.

[C]

And I am going blind, but that's fine. Ripped.

[A]

Dude, you're going to be so jacked in that coffin.

[C]

Oh yeah, dude. Bury me with no shirt on.

[A]

Well, people online really hate on peptides and they're really so mad at them and discredit them. But I.

[C]

Who gives a fuck?

[A]

I just think it's like, it seems like it's the new modern medicine.

[C]

If you're not open peptides like by. You're going to die at a normal age peptides. If you start them at the right age and you stick with them, you're living to 150.

[A]

It's just.

[C]

Yeah, 150 at minimum. I don't know. Because they reverse aging. The whole, the whole thing of why you die is oxidation and your antioxidants. If your cells oxidize, you get cancer. You're more susceptible. Your bones weaken, your heart weakens, your body runs out of fuel, basically. And, and you're in a state of entropy just like everything. So you're constantly going towards chaos.

[A]

Towards chaos.

[C]

Okay, yes. But if you stop that at a reasonable age and even reverse it, why would you die right.

[A]

Like you, you now I've noticed that one of you.

[B]

I'm getting on peptides.

[A]

Dude, you got to go peppies right now. You're on pepperoni. Todd, you got to get me peptides.

[C]

I got you.

[A]

He's got he. Thanks the plug. And also too even waiting on our number.

[C]

No, I don't.

[A]

Oh, sorry.

[C]

I don't know where to get him.

[A]

He even said, I will find out, dude. You know like, like Winstrol, which used to be like the illegal steroid whatever. Like these clinics now that I get the Peptides from, that's like open about it. They sell them online.

[C]

Like Winstrol?

[A]

Yeah. Isn't Winstral's like legal now?

[C]

I don't know. Winstrol's crazy.

[A]

Really?

[C]

It's so bad. It's.

[A]

Winnie, do you ever take. What are the steroids you've taken? And what. Like, what would you. Because you're the one that also told me like, steroids aren't as. Like we all think from these early studies, steroids give you cancer. They do this and do that. But actually taken properly, steroids don't do those things.

[C]

Well, Lyle Alzado died from brain cancer and was on steroids and was grasping for some way to explain this tragedy that befell him and he blamed it on steroids. And everyone was just like, oh my God, steroids cause brain cancer. They don't. How could. I don't know. Anyway, so I think people, because it seems too good to be true, people just, they, they talk themselves out of it. They go, I'm scared of my heart or whatever.

[A]

But your health, that's your proof of your healthy.

[C]

And I'm. I don't think I'm so special that I'm like an anomaly of a physical specimen that I'm not susceptible to the side effects, but I also don't. So with, with these things, minimum effective dose is.

[A]

Yeah, so that's. He's big on that, which I love that. So in other words, the trizepatide, you're not taking the max dose. You take like almost a micro dose of it.

[C]

No, I don't microdose it that you take that.

[A]

You fucking light stuff up. I thought you just said the minimal effective dose for.

[C]

For testosterone and other things. Like first of all, testosterone. Fine, good. I think it should be like borderline mandatory for men once they turn 40.

[A]

Right.

[C]

You should have a good reason not to do it.

[B]

Is there any. Is there any risk? Because otherwise I'll do it.

[C]

Your blood thickens. That's like the only thing that happens to everybody. But if you donate blood and you exercise and you oxygenate your blood and you're hydrated, then you're you're clear. And you can get estrogen buildup, but you take an anti estrogen and you're good. Or primo is an anti estrogen. That's an anabolic, that has anti estrogenic effects.

[A]

And so you think people will live. How long has TRT been around?

[B]

Well, check it out. In the 40s. Look at this. Steroids, their first practical use. I had no idea about this. People would be interested to know this. The first practical use for steroids was put into play by the Nazis, obviously. Yeah.

[C]

We're doing meth and roids.

[B]

They were given to troops to increase aggression, reduce fatigue and improve performance under stress. While Jew hunting.

[A]

Yeah. They took it from animal testicles. So wild. So. But the thing is. So that's the thing with trt. I understand that the argument for peptides being new and there's only like BPT, BPC, BPC157 7. All that. Like that's only have studies on animals. I get that. The wolverine stack. Why you want to take that? I understand. But testosterone, that's been studied for years and years and years. People have been on TRT for 30 years.

[C]

And it, and it's produced in your body, but so are the peptides. Peptides are just broken down chains of proteins or amino acids.

[A]

Right.

[C]

That have a specific effect.

[A]

Right.

[C]

So like GH has 191amino acids. There's a peptide that I don't like, GH, called growth.

[A]

Mean growth hormone.

[C]

Growth hormone, yeah. I'm not a fan of growth hormone. No. There's a, a peptide called frag 176 to 191. So that's PEP, that's Amino Acid 176 to 191. That's supposed to be the chain that, that burns fat.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

If you take gh, you'll burn fat. Your sleep will get better, your skin will get better, whatever. But your nose will also grow.

[A]

Right. You don't want that. Right?

[C]

It's growth hormone. Like it's, it doesn't, it doesn't like,

[B]

doesn't pick and choose where it grows.

[C]

No. Every.

[B]

Will your dick grow though with it?

[A]

That's the thing.

[C]

Probably.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

That's.

[A]

You know, I'm taking right now, Red. A true tide. And Tessa Morland. Tessa Morland's at night. That's the one that they developed that one with HIV patients.

[C]

Muscle weight.

[A]

That, that was for AIDS patients to target their visceral belly fat. Yeah, but I'm on the test of Morland because my visceral fat is probably High because of my cholesterol. So they said, theoretically, this will lower your. This. They saw that. My doctors told me retatrutide intestamorelin is not. It doesn't do what a statin does. But the result is your cholesterol should come down because your inflammation will come down.

[C]

Yes. Yeah. I have, when I got the scan. They also give you visceral fat. So I have a pound of visceral fat.

[A]

Is that pie?

[C]

Is that what.

[A]

That's not high. That's very low.

[C]

Right. It's. They want it to be less than one pound. But if my wife, who's half my size, has a pound of visceral fat and I do, surely that's not equal.

[A]

Sure. Right.

[C]

I'm, you know, I weigh, you know, way, way more than.

[A]

What are you right now? 222, 215.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah. Fuck, yeah. That never lasts, though.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Once I hit 215, I'm like, let's.

[B]

That's all muscle.

[C]

Take the foot out of the gas.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Well, I mean. Yeah. So, okay, so. So you're also the one who told me that this whole myth about protein that you need to get it within an hour of working out is a lie. That was put. Put out by the fitness industry.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

A lot of people do not know that.

[C]

By the protein companies.

[A]

Right.

[C]

And the set and rep scheme was put out by the muscle magazines because they had to have something to put in their magazines.

[A]

Yeah. It's three sets of ten. It's like, that doesn't mean anything. You should really be going to as close to failure as possible on most days. Right.

[C]

The whole reason you would do three sets of 10 is so that the 8th, 9th, 10th rep of the third set, you're at failure.

[A]

Right. So just don't get to failure in two sets. That's fine.

[C]

Get failure in one set.

[A]

Doesn't matter.

[C]

It doesn't matter.

[B]

So go as heavy as you can. What about your heart, though?

[C]

What about your heart?

[B]

But if you strain too much on your heart, lifting too much weight on that first.

[C]

No, that's not how it works.

[A]

No, no, no, no. The thing you could do, if you're lifting too much and you're not breathing properly, you can pass out, but just breathe.

[C]

Yeah, you could, but that's like.

[A]

I mean, you're Valsalva maneuver.

[C]

You're lifting £800 and not breathing. And you. Then you did the. The smelling salts and like, what did

[A]

you do for chest this week or last week?

[C]

I did incline Smith machine.

[A]

Okay. What But. But what were the water. 10 reps. Oh, I did. Yeah. Smithtown press water.

[C]

Sit down.

[B]

Water press.

[C]

Yeah, I did. I did. I warmed up with. With a 45 on each side. I did that like three. Like three sets of ten. Just.

[A]

Just getting the muscles fly.

[C]

I mean, I'm 45. I got to.

[A]

Yeah, you got to warm it up.

[C]

I got to warm it up.

[A]

And then what?

[C]

Then I do. So this I learned from Mike O Hearn.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

You know that is m. No, tell us. You definitely know who it is. I don't know if you can pull him up on there, but he's Jack Micah. Mike Oern.

[A]

Mike Oern.

[B]

There you go.

[A]

There we go. Oh, wow. Oh, yeah. I've seen this guy a bunch. He's on Juice, right?

[C]

He says he's not, but whether he. So first of all, he's looked like that since he was 7. 17.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Second of all, he's 50.

[A]

Something like, even if he was on Juice, it's still impressive.

[C]

Doesn't matter. Yeah, it doesn't matter.

[A]

So what. So what did he say? So.

[C]

So what he does is he lifts so heavy in the beginning of the workout because it primes your nervous system for heavy, heavy weight.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

So when I did chest with him at Gold's, he put 315 on the incline right out of the gate. No, you build up to it, but, like, you build up pretty fast. And then he put 365 on, which I couldn't do. And he goes, go over there. Wait, come back after a couple people do sets. I guarantee you'll be able to do it.

[A]

So. So you waited. What. What was that? 10 minute wait? 5 minute wait?

[C]

No, less than 5, right? Probably. But yeah, I had to prime my nervous system.

[A]

And then you did it.

[C]

Yeah, I did it three times.

[A]

You did it three times? You couldn't do it once, and then you did it three times.

[C]

Couldn't do it once.

[B]

Interesting. So.

[A]

So that. So, but okay, so. So for you with chest, you did how many sets of the incline?

[C]

Okay, So I did two incline.

[A]

And what does that mean?

[C]

I put 225 on. I did it super slow, right? And I. I got like nine the first time and then seven the second time.

[A]

But to. So seven to the. Because you're going so slow. Was almost at failure.

[C]

That's how you make it. That's how you get to failure in one set. You got to slow down the tempo.

[A]

You can't just go as fast as you can.

[C]

No, that's momentum. I'm Not. I'm not a weight lifter.

[A]

Right. And you need a spotter on this stuff, right? You did the Smith right now.

[C]

But I also don't lift so heavy that I need a spot spotter.

[A]

Right.

[C]

And then I did dips, right. Which Michael Hearn calls the squat of the upper body.

[A]

Okay. Just tricep dips.

[C]

The tricep chest, shoulder, tricep back.

[A]

It's like weighted, though.

[C]

I did weighted. Yeah.

[A]

Right. You. What do you. What do you tie on there?

[C]

I put on a 45.

[A]

Right. Because you should. And putting on weight. Putting on weight there is like, a necessity, Right. You can't just do on body weight

[B]

unless you're a girl, Right?

[A]

Unless you're a woman.

[C]

You can make anything, can be heavy.

[A]

Just do it real slow.

[C]

Do it real slow and do it for as long as you can. Like, you will get. You will fail your body, and then

[A]

your body will grow. It just will.

[C]

Yeah. And then.

[B]

I like what you're saying. So you basically, if you go slower, it gets harder. No matter even if you're doing pause.

[A]

Yeah, pause. Time under tension. Right?

[C]

Time under tension.

[A]

That's what it is. So you did that. So you did the incline. You did the. The two working sets, one set of dips.

[C]

And then.

[A]

But to fail. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

And let me ask you this. When you're banging the wife, do you ever pull one of those in the mirror like an American Psycho?

[C]

I don't flex, but we.

[B]

We're.

[A]

We do.

[C]

That is.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Strategically.

[B]

Yeah, you got him there.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

I would like to see myself.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

If I look like that, I'd like to see myself.

[A]

Well, you know what?

[B]

I would like to bang and not see myself.

[A]

Right? Well, you. You get hornier when you look good. If you were fucking yourself. If you're banging in the mirror and you think you look better, you'll get horny.

[B]

I'll fucking do that.

[A]

Yeah. I'll fuck me.

[C]

Maybe if I had hair.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You know.

[A]

Okay, so then. So then you do a set of dips to failure. And then what?

[C]

And then one set of heavy. Like the shoulder machine, right? That. Where you go like this.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

Turn around.

[A]

That heavy. And that was it.

[C]

Keep your shoulders down. Squeeze it.

[A]

And that was it for chest.

[C]

That was it.

[A]

But it was to failure. And you felt a pump.

[C]

And I did that at the beginning of last week.

[A]

And you won't touch chest again.

[C]

And I did. I did back on Friday.

[A]

Right.

[C]

And I haven't lifted weights since then.

[A]

And you're also not spending Two hours. The gym? No, like an hour top.

[C]

I'm, I'm a big proponent of the cumulative effect of anything.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

So do it, do it, do it, don't. Oh. Because if you, first of all, if you overdo anything, you're going to burn out and get discouraged because results take time. Not like you can't bake a cake in half the time by double by baking it at 800°.

[A]

Right.

[C]

You have to give things time to, to unfold or happen. So, so you know, I've been working out for, for 30 years, right. And when people ask how long I'm in there, if it's 45 minutes or an hour or whatever it is, they will inevitably say I can't believe that. That's crazy because they probably went to the gym for two hours, got it for three months and saw no results. So obviously it doesn't work. The gym doesn't work. That's.

[B]

But if you've been doing it for 30 years, looking at you as a cumulative effect.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Even if you did 10 minutes that day.

[C]

I'm a big proponent.

[B]

Basically we're, if we haven't been doing it for 30 years.

[C]

No, it doesn't take 30 years to get. No, but you can't stop, right? You can't stop and you can't overthink things because if you overthink things you'll get discouraged also because you'll think I did it wrong. Why would I even bother doing.

[A]

Yeah, like and, and, and you good and rest and sleep. How important it is like today, you know, I had a busy day day and I normally would have woken up at 5am, tried to go to the gym, whatever, but instead I, I, I, I slept in a little bit longer and I had about 40 minutes after I dropped the kids off. And I worked out there. Yeah, I did, I did in, in my garage. I, I did some, I did some bench press, I did some weighted push ups all to failures, kind of same idea prime. You know, I didn't go that heavy. I didn't have a spot or anything in a Smith machine. But then you know, Jasmine was a little like, she was like, you know, because the kids need to go to school. School. And she was like, you know, you should have woken up earlier to do this. And I said, Tank, Sinatra said to sleep in a little bit longer to give my body more time to rest.

[B]

You.

[C]

Yeah, tell her that's what I said. I can't believe she yelled at me the other day.

[A]

She yelled at Tank? Yeah, she was mad. First time what was it again?

[B]

Cause there's nothing better to stay hard than popping a tablet from Bluetooth.

[A]

That's what I like. And for me, even though I've been telling you I've been doing deep squats, trying to get my asshole hovering up off the floor like little bit, I'd be getting a little bit hornier, but I really get horny. I really get horny when I pop a tablet from Bluechew and put on Top Gun Maverick.

[B]

Listen, it's like peptides for your penis.

[A]

That's what it is.

[B]

You got to pop a tablet that you get from Bluechew. Bluechew gold dissolves under your tongue and works in as little as 15 minutes.

[A]

Nick's been taking him. He's been popping tablets from Bluechew to get his rock hard cock out to keep ice away.

[B]

One thing Nick does cuz he sits down and he puts on the WWE WrestleMania on weekend and he pops a tablet from Bluechew.

[A]

It's what it is. He was stroking his monkey to Brock Lesnar last weekend.

[B]

It's the number one chewable Ed brand. Check that out. This ain't your grandpa's little blue pill.

[A]

No.

[B]

So what you got to do? We got a special deal for our listeners. Get 10% off your first month of Bluechew gold with the code Hyenas. That's promo code hyenas. Visit bluechew.com for more details and safety information. And we thank Bluechew for sponsoring the history Hyena. Cuz, I'd like you to do one thing for me. Tell me, explain to me all about Shopify.

[A]

Cuz. Cha ching, I like Shopify. If you're running a business and you don't have Shopify, you're just an asshole.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay. I want you to accelerate your efficiency whether you're uploading new products or trying to improve existing ones. Shopify is packed with helpful AI tools that write product descriptions, pages, page headlines, and even enhance your product photography. So it's just, it's like AI that helps you. I mean, I checked out at the store yesterday and they were using, using a Shopify credit card thing and it was just amazing. It was 1, 2, 3. Makes it very simple. They got the iconic purple shop pay button that's used by millions of businesses around the world. It's why Shopify has the best converting checkout on the planet. Cause it's all about Shopify.

[B]

Yeah. You use Shopify and you could basically rest assured that your business will be ding free 100%.

[A]

Because. Because what? What can't get dinged up with Shopify. We're looking for the Cha Ching. No ding. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

It's so.

[A]

It's.

[B]

You know, it's just amazing. It's time to turn those what ifs into Cha Ching Cha Ching Shopify. So sign up today for your $1 per month trial.

[A]

Ooh.

[C]

Come on.

[B]

You could do that at shopify.com/hyenas. Go to shopify.com hyenas that. Shopify.com hyenas.

[C]

You guys got a fence, right?

[A]

Oh, yeah, we got a fence. And I wanted too much money.

[C]

Estimate, right. I don't know if it was too much money. It's. You got the most expensive fence you could possibly buy.

[B]

That's the way to go, right?

[A]

Yeah, Yeah. I go hard to go home.

[B]

Go hard to go home.

[C]

Around the entire property.

[A]

Around the entire. I got a part. I got a section of a fence. Fence. The fence that I put around my entire backyard was supposed to be, like, just the front nice part. And I got around the entire yard, and it was wasteful.

[C]

And Tank was not wasteful.

[A]

And Tank and I. And. But. And Jasmine was getting mad because she's like, we already paid for it.

[C]

What does it matter? What does it matter?

[A]

And she got mad. But then I. And. And I was, like, looking at her like, what the are you, like, yelling at my friend? And then she calmed down and said she was sorry.

[C]

Yeah. Because I always thought she liked me. I still think she actually does. She does.

[A]

How much did you like. For what? I get banged for 30 or 40 grand.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I got the whole property. The whole property's not terrible, but it's.

[B]

I mean, that's what you. That's what it is if you go with the height.

[A]

Yeah, but Tank. But Tank worked for a fence company for what, 10 years? You know a lot about fences.

[C]

That is. I mean, it's cedar lattice topper.

[B]

Oh, you did cedar and got banged out for 30. 40.

[C]

Cedar is so expensive. Is it the most expensive fence you can buy?

[B]

Is that. That's wood, right?

[C]

Yeah, but it's cedar.

[B]

Oh, right.

[C]

So with, like, Cedar Stockade.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Is like double the price of Spruce Stockade.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

This is so boring.

[B]

No, no, this is what people want to know.

[A]

Yeah. We make this funny.

[B]

Listen, a lot of people need fences out there, and they're going to get ripped off. So tell them how not to get ripped off.

[C]

Yeah. Just get more. Get multiple prices.

[A]

Get multiple.

[C]

The only thing you can do.

[A]

That's the only thing. Yeah, see, they got that Go.

[B]

Illegal labor. Yes.

[C]

So cedar fence. Lattice topper, if you could. Lattice topper, if you could put that.

[B]

Plus you got a nice wood fence.

[A]

Lattice topper sounds like a. Like a black lady from Detroit.

[B]

All I know is the next owner of that house is going to get a great fence at a house at a discount.

[A]

Yeah, I got a stick and move.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. And.

[B]

And oh, that is a nice fence though, guys.

[A]

Yeah, it's nice.

[B]

You know, some people who do fall in love with fences.

[A]

Oh, yeah, there's one.

[B]

There's like people who have a fetish for fences and they kiss and they hug fences.

[C]

Really?

[A]

Somebody coming. I got that fence. Lowe's wood fence. That's kind of what it looks like.

[C]

But that quality. Quality is.

[A]

Yeah, that's a quality.

[C]

That's not what you got.

[A]

But I got the nice top. And then we're going to stain it and you know.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Different color.

[C]

So you get like two years of the nice raw wood look and then you stain it and then you get a new fence. If you want to power wash it and stain it like every five years,

[A]

that's what you got to stain it every five years. It's like four grand to stain it.

[C]

Probably. I have no idea.

[A]

That's what the guy told. He said about four.

[C]

That's not bad at all.

[A]

He said about four. 4,500 bucks will stain this whole thing for you.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Now you.

[C]

But you got to wait till it dries out.

[B]

Yeah. Ye.

[A]

Yeah, he told me he can't stay in our shit until the summer.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Now you knew that he worked for a fence company. He didn't.

[C]

Wait, I didn't. I'm an idiot. I haven't worked for a fence company for years.

[A]

I'm an idiot. And also what tank does if you're pumping gas like my local gas station. Yeah, Tanks. The. Does the commercial today you were talking about child sex slavery and I. Or some kid getting something like that once I think. Yeah.

[B]

And so when I say a gas.

[A]

Gas station. Yeah. Yeah. And I said on his podcast, it's sometimes for me when his videos come. Come on. I forget to pump the gas in my car cuz I stick the nozzle right up my ass and I start pumping the gas direct into my. And I'm leaking 93 and my car broke down on the side of the BQE.

[C]

Now do you get leak in 93? Has a ring to it.

[A]

Yeah. Should we. Is that the name of the episode? Leak in 93 with tanks. Does.

[B]

Does Chris text you crazy.

[C]

He. Yeah, he does, he does.

[B]

And out of the blue he'll ask you about stuff.

[C]

Well, the. I think we told this story on my podcast.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But nobody listens to that.

[C]

Yeah. So the first time I met Chris in person was at Comedy Central Cluster Fest.

[A]

Yeah. Yes.

[C]

And I, and I picked him to Comedy Central, wanted me to promote it and they gave me a trip out there. So I was like, yes. So I picked his clip about the guy on the scooter, posted it. It did. Fantastic. And then I went and I told him whatever I told him I was using his clip. Then we started exchanging, you know, testosterone information, you know, and when we met, I was with my wife and he sends me a text that says, I can see your through your jeans. We just met and I, and I saw it and I never responded to it and we never talked about it again until.

[A]

Yeah, until I, And I was dying inside for months because I thought Tank hated me because I sent that text and I was like, oh, he never responded.

[C]

No, baby, no, no, no.

[B]

Yeah. It's funny, like when you first start to become friends with Chris, you get a text like that and you're going like, what's going on here? But then after you've been friends with him for a while, you just glance at it and you just move on to the next thing. Yeah. What time we do it? The pod. Yeah, it's just what it is. You just get used to.

[C]

To it.

[A]

Yeah, you just get used to it.

[B]

So, so cuz, why did you tell him that you saw his through his jeans?

[A]

Because I saw his through his jeans because I was looking.

[C]

He's just, he's, he's forthcoming. So I, so I got a text from him that says, when is this out of nowhere? This is Wednesday.

[A]

Wednesday last week. Okay.

[C]

Hey cuz, do you ever wonder what a May taste like?

[A]

And we hadn't been, we hadn't feel

[C]

like a week or, or it's honestly never popped into your head ever? And I wrote hahaha. And then he goes, I guess that's a no. And I go, I've wondered literally everything because I felt like I was leaving out there. But yeah, yeah, I mean I've, I've literally, I've been thinking straight for 45.

[A]

Right, right.

[C]

Have you, have you ever wondered, have you ever wondered if you were a different race? Like what if you were Korean?

[B]

Cause you're a fucking sick kid. What is.

[C]

And I go, I've been thinking non stop for 45 years. There's not much that hasn't crossed my Mind. He goes, yes, it's good to be curious. And then, like, two hours later, I write Curious George, baby. And he just wrote Curious Cox.

[B]

Ever wondered what it would be like to be Korean?

[A]

Yeah, I just thought, you know, sit there.

[B]

Sometimes I wonder about it.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, I just. Sometimes I think about, you know, what if you had a completely different. Different existence on this planet?

[B]

Right.

[C]

Oh, yeah. The mind is like, so. So I'm reading this book right now called the Road Less Traveled.

[A]

Oh, yeah, My mom read that.

[C]

Oh, bro, it's so good, like, to be career.

[B]

Just sitting there thinking about it. That was. Reach out to somebody. See if somebody else had been thinking about that, too.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. I'll never.

[B]

Because.

[C]

Because I think he wanted to make it seem like he doesn't wonder what cocktails all the.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just take a little steak off. Yeah. But I remember that when I sent you those texts, Josephine, our dog, had gotten out of the yard for the first time ever.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And so, like. And. And our neighbor had, like, found it. And then I remember Jasmine had said, I don't see Josephine in the yard. Can you look for her? And I said, yeah, I'll do it. And then I didn't look for. And started texting you. As my dog could have been running

[C]

down the highway, he had to know.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Am I the only one who wonders what it's like to be Korean?

[B]

Did you wonder what it was like? What'd you call.

[A]

Come up with. I just know. Well, I think I just thought, you know, because my daughters watch all these Korean shows. Is the K Pop and Demon Hunters now. There's another, like, Beauty School 1 or something like that.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So I look at these guys and I'm like, what would it be like? Like, what if I was the same me? I'm the same person, the same existence, same neighborhood. But I'm Korean. My parents are Korean. So it's like, you know. Yeah. They won't be like, I won't have the Italian jokes or, you know, but I'll be Korean. I'll be the Korean version of it all. What if that, like.

[C]

I don't think it happens.

[A]

Right.

[C]

Yeah, I don't think it happens. I think you grow up with a very different worldview. And.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Probably not making Nazi jokes.

[A]

Right.

[C]

You know?

[A]

Right.

[B]

Good thing is, I think you feel. You just feel trapped.

[A]

I feel trapped.

[B]

Reality.

[C]

But you're not.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

But you're not.

[B]

You want to be Korean. You just want to get out.

[A]

I want to just be Korean for a minute.

[B]

Be Korean for a second. You're just, you're a little upset that you can't break free and be Korean for a.

[A]

That's what it is.

[B]

He just wants to break free and be Korean for a second.

[A]

For a second. But that's why I'm doing peptides. I want my immunoass to break free. Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

So I. I was in a hyperbaric oxygen chamber.

[A]

Okay. Recently.

[C]

Yes. Like, first time was fine. I lasted an hour. But the last minute I was panicked because you're locked in from the outside.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

And it's pressurized and it really clanks down loud when. When they lock it. And when the session is over, you have to wait for it for. To depressurize. And I was getting hot, so. So with that in mind, I never really got over that. I went back like a week later and tried to do an hour, and within 30, I told the guy, I'm like, just, just wait outside for a second. Like, don't leave.

[A]

Right.

[C]

He locks it, walks away. And I'm like, I just. I started panicking immediately.

[A]

How do you know he walked away? You can see them.

[C]

Yeah, you can see out of it. First of all, you're laying on the ground. It's like a coffin.

[B]

It's.

[C]

It's bad. It's not great. So. So what I realized is that I don't like feeling trapped. I never get claustrophobic physically, but mentally, yeah, I'm definitely claustrophobic. I feel like I'm trapped in this. This idea of what I'm supposed to be. And I'm also trying to break free of that by just.

[B]

So then it's a good question. Have you ever wondered about being Korean?

[C]

I have, yeah. I've wondered everything.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Like, I don't think there's a sentence you could put together that hasn't crossed.

[B]

First of all, I'd want to be South Korean.

[A]

Right.

[B]

I wouldn't want to be North.

[C]

No.

[A]

North Korean would be more options. Yeah.

[B]

But then maybe ignorance, the bliss of the ignorance from being North Korean might be nice too. There's like, you want Peptides? And you go, like, what?

[C]

I'm just like, you don't know. You don't know.

[B]

You don't know. You don't know. And that might be nice.

[C]

You might feel really good that the leader of your country is actually the creator of the universe.

[B]

That might.

[A]

Exactly. Who never has taken a shit in his life.

[C]

How lucky are you? How lucky are they?

[B]

Yeah, very lucky to have the supreme leader.

[A]

Now, what is the hyperbaric oxygen tank. Do you or your bod.

[C]

It like aggressively increases repair.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

In the body.

[A]

So if you got knee pain or shoulder pain going.

[C]

Anything, anything. Olympic athletes use it a lot. That's how Captain. Captain America.

[A]

Captain Planet.

[C]

No, I think Captain. The guy that Chris Evans played.

[A]

Captain America.

[C]

Captain America. He was in the hyperbaric or maybe, I don't know, whatever the fuck it is. It's superhero lore.

[B]

Holy shit. You breathe 100% pure oxygen at pressure at 1.5 the three times higher. The. Yeah.

[C]

$46,000. $92,000 for a hyperbaric oxygen chamber. They are no joke.

[A]

But how much is it to just go for one use?

[C]

I think it was like 180 for an hour.

[A]

It's not bad. This is what they. It's like therapy.

[B]

This is what the athletes do now, right? They just hop on that.

[C]

Yeah. Any athlete that you. So when I saw bigger, stronger, faster, which I've told you about, told me to watch.

[A]

I still haven't watched it. I got to watch it.

[C]

The, the shift in my, in my mindset around performance enhancing drugs completely changed because.

[A]

What is it? Talk to us about it.

[C]

So Mark Bell is a well known powerlifter, fitness, you know, fitness industry guy. His brother Chris made a documentary about steroid use in Hollywood Olympics, professional sports. Basically anywhere where you depend on your body for performance or looks. Right. So he got. What really changed my, my viewpoint was he got Carl Lewis. Right. Carl Lewis got the gold medal when Ben Johnson got his stripped for being on Win Winstrom. Yeah. Upon further digging, they found out that Carl Lewis was also on drugs.

[A]

Right.

[C]

They couldn't take it away from him because it's like it, it would undermine the sanctity of the Olympics. So they just left it. So Carl Lewis walked away from that interview in the bleachers and he just went on and on about first of all, like a pitcher, right. When they were using steroids in, in baseball. That was the best time baseball had ever had for sure.

[A]

Right.

[C]

So if a pitcher whose arm is going to fall off and can't throw a pitch can get a shot of a corticosteroid, how is that not a performance enhancing drug?

[A]

Right.

[C]

He can't pitch without it.

[A]

Right.

[C]

Like why is testosterone not allowed? It was just like it shifted everything.

[A]

I thought, what is the reason though? Is there some kind of conspiracy, moral panic? Got it.

[C]

About, about steroids.

[A]

Got it.

[C]

TRT is the rebrand of the century.

[A]

That's a steroid. Trt.

[C]

Yeah. You're on juice. You're roided up.

[A]

Right. You're taking steroids, but they're calling it TRT, legal TRT.

[C]

And it's also not, you know, 200 milligrams a week is a lot different than 800. But once you get past a certain point, the diminishing return of the, of the amount is like pretty low. It's like 2, 3, 3, maybe 400. Anything above that is all side effects.

[A]

Right.

[C]

It's all bad.

[A]

Right.

[C]

But people get, you know, obviously they get hung up on more is better and in a lot of cases it's not.

[A]

Right. So bigger, stronger, faster. Watch that documentary and take steroids.

[C]

That's the, the path.

[A]

Right.

[C]

The pipeline.

[B]

Well, were they saying in the, in the movie that it was bad or. They were saying.

[C]

No, they were just saying that, like

[B]

that's what it was.

[C]

This is. You don't know about this. And we're showing you about this. Brad Pitt and Fight Club took shit. Will Smith and Muhammad Ali took shit. Almost like you've put 60 pounds of

[A]

muscle for all these. Anybody you see who's an action figure

[C]

or action hero to be in shape.

[A]

Right. Well, they said, I saw a thing about peptides is it's following the same route as steroids. Did you start to, you know, it goes into. It circulates amongst bodybuilders at first and guys in gyms. You've known about peptides for years.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Then it goes to Hollywood actors and they start to use it. We're at now. And then eventually it becomes mainstream, which is where we're probably at now.

[C]

And I think as regulation and quality control increases, you're going to see, you're just going to see more and more and more people on all kinds of this. Motsi regenerates intracellular mitochondria.

[A]

Have you taken it?

[C]

No, I have it on the way, though.

[A]

You have it on the way? I've taken Motsi. That's right, I've taken it. But, but, but the thing, you have to take these things for months.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

To see, like the real results.

[C]

Some of them, yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Some you do. So the Retta True tide, you see the results? I mean, in two, three weeks.

[C]

Crazy.

[A]

Crazy. You don't want to take it, though.

[C]

No, I am. I'm going to try it.

[A]

What are you on right now? What peptides you take this morning?

[C]

Tirzepatide. I took that weekly shot.

[A]

Right.

[C]

And then I also got this stuff, Solank and Epithalon.

[A]

Oh, Salink. I've been taking Salink. It's for anxiety.

[C]

Yeah. It just calms your mind down a little bit. I don't know if it works.

[A]

Yeah, it doesn't really work for me as, as well.

[C]

But epithalon, I, I, I have a hard time with sleep.

[A]

To sleep. You can't fall asleep.

[C]

I can fall asleep. I just wake up multiple times.

[A]

Epithelion eat. Yes. Right. See, look at how Jack T. This whole, throws the whole intermittent fasting thing out there when this guy wakes up, he said on a nightly basis and he's been doing it for years. And eats like junk food in the middle of the night.

[C]

I had a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich last night on potato bread in

[A]

the middle of the night.

[C]

Middle of the night.

[A]

And you didn't woke up. You didn't wake up feeling like a fucking fatty?

[C]

Yeah, I did. Can of Coke Zero.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

Two protein bars. A Twix ice cream bar.

[A]

This is in the middle of the night.

[C]

This is over, over the course. Like I think I ate three times

[A]

last night in, at like 2 o' clock in the morning, 4 o'. Clock.

[B]

Are you eating enough during the day?

[C]

Yeah, it does. It doesn't matter. The only thing that I've ever done that's helped me with that particular problem is when I did the keto diet and my blood sugar was steady. It's definitely a blood sugar thing. I don't know. I don't know. So it is what it is.

[A]

So the side effect, this is what

[B]

they say the side effects are of what?

[A]

Of what?

[B]

Specific steroids. Okay, Metabolic steroids.

[A]

Let's see.

[C]

But just real quick, they're lumping in trend. Masteron, testosterone, Winstrol, all of them together. And you have to separate them out.

[A]

But let's see overall what they say. Remember, Chachi Beat is a liberal bitch. Yes.

[B]

They say testicles shrink.

[C]

That's true.

[B]

We're going to go. True or false?

[A]

Check.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Lower natural testosterone. Lower natural testosterone.

[C]

Yeah, of course.

[A]

Fuck.

[B]

Okay. True infertility.

[C]

Debatable.

[B]

Debatable.

[A]

He's got two kids on juice.

[C]

I got pregnant. I got my. I don't get pregnant. Very progressive.

[A]

Yeah, I use the all, I use

[C]

the all gender restroom.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, it's great. It's a good place to take a she. It.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Not my joke. It's from Twitter and I love it.

[A]

It was nice.

[B]

Some guy. Yeah. Erectile dysfunction. True or false?

[C]

The opposite.

[B]

You got a fucking rage. Our boner.

[C]

They're, they're probably talking about deca.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yes. But that's like, that's a thing that almost nobody uses any.

[A]

Right.

[C]

You know?

[A]

Right. So you gotta. You got a rocking hard piece.

[B]

Severe acne, obviously. No, no.

[A]

Kid's skin is amazing.

[C]

Up to individual.

[B]

Up to the individual.

[C]

Up to the individual. Very. I think it's very rare, though. I don't see it a lot.

[B]

Hair loss, male pattern baldness.

[A]

Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. That was from Inglourious Bastards. That's a. Bingo, bingo.

[C]

Well, I've been bald since I was like. I started shaved my head at 14. I never had great hair, but then I really lost it at like 28, 29.

[A]

I was just like, you look good bald.

[B]

You got it nice.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

But it's almost better.

[C]

DHT derived steroids, that's a huge problem for those.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Hairline straw, that's master on.

[A]

Okay?

[B]

Yeah. How about this? Now we get a little aggression.

[A]

No, he's so calm.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Tren.

[B]

Tren will do that.

[C]

Tren will make you an absolute fucking meme.

[B]

So if you don't take Trent, you're good.

[C]

Unless you overdo it or unless you're like. I think steroids are like money. Like you just. You're more of what you are. Right. If you're an asshole and you get rich, you're gonna be a rich asshole.

[B]

Got it?

[C]

If you're a generous person and you get rich, you're gonna be a generous rich person.

[A]

Right.

[B]

There's probably a lot of truth to that, right? How about depression? Especially after a cycle, if you don't end the cycle. Yeah.

[C]

I don't know what after a cycle means.

[B]

Okay. Low energy, low libido. Brain fog.

[C]

Opposite. Total opposite.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Reduced sperm count

[C]

up to the individual. I think. Like I got my wife pregnant with my second child. I had just stopped Trent, like a week before that. I did trend for. I did Tren twice for very short runs. Because I was like, I'm going to go to jail.

[A]

Do you really. You get so angry, you.

[C]

It's, it's, it's indescribable. You're so mad.

[A]

Why?

[C]

Because Tren is a steroid that was derived for cows to get big.

[B]

Right?

[C]

So it's bovine's. You know what I mean? Like, they're not. It's not built for us.

[A]

Right.

[C]

Trent is toxic poison. And nobody should ever take it.

[A]

But you were fucking jacked.

[C]

I look better now, right?

[A]

Right? You were bulky back then.

[C]

Yeah. Monkey bartokamus.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Now we come to the big ones.

[A]

Here we go.

[B]

Heart disease, kidney damage. Psychological addiction, dependency.

[C]

I mean, psychological addiction. I'M sure.

[A]

Right. But heart and kidney.

[C]

So when I. I don't know. The heart is debatable because I've had an EKG every year for the last 15 years. I've never had anything kidney. I don't know what they're talking about.

[A]

Your levels are always good, liver.

[C]

With oral steroids, you'll have a huge problem. Which is why I said they were healthier. Because when I first went to get testosterone from the doctor and he did my blood work, he's like, your liver enzymes are through the roof. Have you ever had hepatitis C or been exposed to it or whatever? And I was like, no, I don't. I don't think so. So it turns out he gave me milk. He told me to take milk thistle, by the way, which is like, that's amazing.

[A]

That's the thing for the liver supplement that.

[C]

That actually works.

[A]

Like, take that and help your liver.

[C]

100. My liver enzymes went down by like 90 in a month.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

But they were high because of all the oral stuff that I was taking from Vitamin Shop, Vitamin World, the supplements. Because anything that goes to your body or stomach, that's not food, gets jammed up in there.

[B]

You're.

[C]

You're digesting cellulose, which is what pills are in.

[A]

So that's the thing. You're taking all these healthy vitamins, but you're having the same effect on your liver as an alcoholic.

[C]

That's why peptides, I think, are going to be a real game changer, because you inject it and once, if you can bypass. Bypass the digestive system, you reduce a whole host of side effects.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

To be honest, because they say. Hey, the. The reason why people still debate. The debate is complicated. Is because people, they work well for faster muscle growth, faster recovery, increased strength, and a leaner physique.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So, I mean, you can't argue it. Looking good. Yeah, it just looks good at the end of the day. You can't argue it.

[C]

Looking nice and feeling good.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Feeling good.

[B]

Feeling good.

[A]

Feeling Winstrom.

[C]

Are you gonna take anything?

[B]

I'm open to it.

[A]

What would you take?

[B]

I'd like. What I'd like to do is take something that got my energy up that seems nice. Make me feel young again.

[C]

Your energy will go up.

[B]

This feels like a facelift for men.

[C]

If. When you lose weight.

[A]

I'm down, like £14 doing it. But I've been doing the.

[C]

But £14 is a fucking lot.

[A]

That's what I'm saying. I've been doing the work like the Peptides have just the retta has definitely helped me curb my eating a little bit. But I've been in the gym working out. Like, like you said, it's just. You can't just sit there and do that and sit on the couch.

[C]

Being too heavy. It affects everything. It affects like. I mean, gravity is just like literally weighing you down more than your bones are.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I've been heavy multiple times in my life.

[A]

And you had more knee pain, more elbow pain, more pain. Hurt. Yeah.

[C]

Everything hurt more. Of course. But I don't know, it's. Losing weight is almost a cure all, which is why these Tirzepatide and all these things are like. If there are any negative side effects, which by the way, the doses at which they do the research are like astronomical.

[A]

Right.

[C]

It's like the aspartame with the, the rats.

[A]

Oh yeah.

[C]

With the causing cancer.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You'd have to drink like 900 cans of diet Coke a day.

[A]

Right.

[C]

To be in that range.

[A]

Right.

[C]

So stupid.

[A]

But they go with it.

[C]

But yeah, I mean if you use it as a tool, you're. You're good to go.

[A]

What are you doing?

[C]

An effective tool.

[A]

What are you doing after this?

[C]

I'm going to go to the gym.

[A]

The pack.

[C]

The pack. And work out on 23rd in between 5th and 6.

[A]

Oh yeah. And work out or you're just going to go.

[C]

I'm going to hang in and work out.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Nice. Also the tanks. Good news is still out there.

[C]

That page on. On the gas. That's what's on the gas station TVs.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, that's gas station TVs.

[C]

So influencers in the W and influences

[B]

you out, which is a fun channel.

[C]

Fun channel.

[A]

That is a very fun channel.

[C]

Good time.

[A]

What? I love you.

[C]

I love you.

[B]

Love you too, man. Good to see you.

[A]

No, but it's. And you.

[B]

Next time he comes, we're just going to all three. We don't even know how we're going to fit in here.

[C]

Let's do it. Yeah, let's. We're going to. You want to take your shirt off?

[A]

No, no,

[B]

I'm definitely not taking my shirt off.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

I'm going to other pool.

[A]

I mean, because I'll tell you what, that.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I was embarrassed to take my shirt off when I was fat, obviously. Obviously.

[A]

Right.

[C]

When I. When I got lean, I was still embarrassed to take my shirt off.

[A]

How do you get your traps like that? What's the exercise?

[C]

I don't know, dude. I. I feel like it was at a school Event for my son. It was at the beach.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I felt like I was gonna make people feel bad. I was gonna make the dads feel bad. Like I didn't want to take my shirt off. I was embarrassed. On the other side of the spectrum, it's so the. The brain.

[A]

Brain is what? Yeah. So. Yeah.

[C]

So stupid.

[A]

But how do you get your traps and shoulders like that? What's the workout regimen in for that?

[C]

I don't do any trap exercises.

[A]

Really? So how do they look like that?

[C]

Some things you got and some things you don't.

[A]

Yeah, right. That's just. You've always had.

[B]

Some people got good feet, some people don't. Some people got normal sized heads, and some people don't. I don't.

[C]

My head is huge.

[B]

My head is small.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Can I smell your nipples?

[C]

Yeah, if you want.

[B]

All right, we'll see you next. Well, we'll end on this.

[A]

Really good.

[B]

The boy kissed it. Because you're at least a little bit. A little bit not. You're on the spectrum. Exceptionally.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You're a nine. Eight on the Kinsey scale.

[A]

Well, I didn't lick it. I smelled it.

[B]

No, you kissed it. I heard the kiss.

[A]

No, he. He kissed. Yeah. No, I. I just sniffed his nipple because I wanted to see what it smelled like. It smells good. It smells like he's. It's clean.

[C]

Yeah, I'm clean. Real clean, kid. Clean nipples. Call me. Clean nipples.

[A]

Clean nipples. Yeah. All right. A lot of guys are going to jerk off to this and episode.

[B]

Guys, you need to be put to a prison.

[C]

Good night. Him if he goes to prison day within the first hour.

[B]

Oh, for sure.

[A]

Out.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You just smelled the snipples. That what you did?

[A]

I took a sniff of his nipples. A little nipple whip. It's just a snipple. All right. I love you guys. Go to patreon.com history hyenas. Hear it all.

[C]

Bye.

[A]

God.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

All right. As always, patreon.com history hyenas, the new members of the matriarchy. We read out the names. When you sign up, you get your name right out. Hopefully it's next week, but a lot of times we're delayed because we get so many members that sign up. So we appreciate your support. The funniest name wins the PPW Pseudo penis of the week. Okay, here we go. Welcome to the podcast. Chrissy's Bashful Middle Toe. Okay.

[B]

Chicken finger.

[A]

Not bad.

[B]

Right off the bat.

[A]

Yeah. Then we got Matzah Mutt.

[B]

Chicken finger. Okay.

[A]

Then we got Father Bill. Paid My bills one time. Now I have to be at Motel 6 in 15 minutes for the rest of my.

[B]

My life. Okay, wow. We're starting off very strong.

[A]

Yeah. Ferguson. Then we got Simon Rex's. Simon Rex's. Chris's balloon knot. Okay. Kid Rock looks like Jesus of Methlehem.

[B]

Take out the catapult.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Take out the catapult.

[A]

Yep. That's getting on. Bethlehem has been there for centuries and we never thought of it.

[B]

I mean, what we have now is what we call a free front runner.

[A]

Front runner. Nick Chrisley. B, Matthew Keys. Then we got caught Priest having sex with my mom. He was well over the coffin ladder 14. I mean, it's dark.

[B]

Dark. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. Okay. It's a dark one. Good one, though, Tone. Keep life moving. My spank bank is feet picks.

[B]

Okay. It's just what it is. Yeah. Some of these are just what it is.

[A]

Yeah. Willing to let AOC dump on my chest for reparations.

[B]

Okie dokie. That's what it is.

[A]

Hey, Bert. Exclamation point. Nolan.

[B]

Mag.

[A]

Then we got. I like to put honey on my chest.

[B]

And then.

[A]

Come on, my tummy calls me the big gay honey nut.

[B]

Drexler. Funny.

[A]

Then we got breaking news. Seal Team 6 rescues GI Joe from Giannis's ass.

[B]

Put him on the list. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Then we got goo at Fashion Week, AKA Ugers. And Paris.

[B]

Good one. I mean. Yeah. He's talking about.

[A]

Then he's. Then he's talking to the Uyghurs.

[B]

Uers in Paris.

[A]

The. The. The Muslim part of China. Yeah.

[B]

You know what the problem is with that? It's like the first part doesn't really match the Uyghurs.

[A]

Right.

[B]

In Paris, if you had something better, if he said something like, you know.

[A]

Right.

[B]

I am Muslim in Shanghai.

[A]

Right. Call me an Uyghur in Paris. Yes.

[B]

Something like that. So it didn't match. Almost.

[A]

But. But good. Good after.

[B]

Good swing.

[A]

Then we got Netanyahu, who we've had. Okay. Ace bb Spank My Ass Blue. Give me the bento box.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Vaporize. Then we got cash, mortgage, eyes. Patel. One's fixed, one's variable. Ok.

[B]

Complicated.

[A]

Complicated. Jesus definitely wasn't a Leroy because the shroud had no imprint of a basketball platform.

[B]

I mean, it's what it is. Yeah.

[A]

L.D. then we got Eskimo Bros with Katie Holmes. Plus matching asshat. Okay. Jared Waters. Squeak, amuse boosh. NJM 23. $5. Tickle me Elmos out of the trunk. Yeah. It's a hefty price, though. Two cents short. Calvin Johnson dropped Mr. Gnomes tits in Iran. Problem solved.

[B]

A couple of bombs, Drexler.

[A]

Yeah, like that Mr. Gnome is funny. Yeah. Ryan Walker. Daniel Vanderplatt just found out my franks and beans are back together. Herpes. $5. I don't know what that means. Oh, here's $5.

[B]

Don't get it. You get it.

[A]

No.

[B]

Here.

[A]

Frank sees beans. You're back together. And here's your five. Oh, here's $5. Okay. Thank you. Welcome back. Yeah.

[B]

You get. You get a chicken figure just because. Yeah.

[A]

Then we got Pumpkin Dick Papas.

[B]

Pumpkin Dick, by the way, Pumpkin Dick Papas. I remembered I met Pumpkin Dick Po. Hi. Really?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I met him. They are huge fans.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

They waited for me after the last show. They're from Maine. From Bangor, Maine. And they drove down to Boston.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

And he said Pumpkin Dick. Peanut, was it Pumpkin.

[A]

Pumpkin Dick Papus.

[B]

Because when you see that on the patreon. That's me.

[A]

That's me.

[B]

So. And let me just tell you your girl's piece.

[A]

There it is.

[B]

So congrats. Okay.

[A]

Riley caporaro. Schmooey. Mr. Gnomes garment rentals. Alex, what did the gay blind man do to the hot hung Leroy? Walked into one. Madeline Wilson Burns. May Morelli. Can I borrow your glue gun? Mine's got fumes.

[B]

Clean it.

[A]

Clean it. Yeah. Chrissy's had more pilots killed than 9 11.

[B]

He just used your job.

[A]

Yeah. It's what it is. Yeah. Gay Ridge Boys. Alex, the twink you just had on the podcast. That twink you just had on the podcast. Oh. Joey Kamasta. Yeah. Trace Pesos. Guillermo. Oh, three dollar three Guillermo.

[B]

I like that.

[A]

Yeah. Power Bottom Gay on the beam in a different.

[B]

Like that.

[A]

Grace, new tunic for my favorite eunuch.

[B]

Did you knit it for him?

[A]

That's nice.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Jennifer Poriferous. Zachary Garfinkel. Desert Chris. Paul Gutzon. Kara Carly Dorsch. Lauren Bowl. My peace brings peace. Lisa Rubichad. William Hutchinson. Matt Prego. Gal Janicelli. Jason Gortson. Uncle Ben's court appointed attorney. Chrissy's Korean. Chrissy's Korean. BO Obsession needs to be studied. That's what it is. Do you have that? I do. I always talk about Koreans. Bo. They don't have bo. Right. Because they have an enzyme that they can't stink.

[B]

That is true.

[A]

Frisbee war. Got me fume scrolling. The Sandra D. Algorithm. Some people like Frisbees, but I prefer.

[B]

Right. A lot of fortune walk in one.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Ladder 14 makes me flick my bean. Wei Shawn Sheen. Rio Grande Swim Team.

[B]

That's a good one. Yeah, that's a real good one.

[A]

Do we have that one?

[B]

No. I don't know. I know. I've said. I've said my front lawn is going to look like the Rio Grande when I'm doing. You know, when I'm doing my lawn. That's a good one. I'm going to give it a Drexler.

[A]

Stinky guy.

[B]

He's putting it in somebody's ass.

[A]

And then we got. And then we got Mr. Wong. Reigns driving School. Move over. Priest Way.

[B]

Song Chie walked it away.

[A]

So we only got two on the list.

[B]

Good ones.

[A]

That's interesting. So the list comes down to Kid Rock Looks like Jesus of Methlehem. Or, breaking news. Seal Team 6 rescues GI Joe from Giannis's ass.

[B]

Second one is very funny, but, yeah, it's the definition of a Drexler. The winner played with the goat, unfortunately. Clyde, I apologize. Jordan's in the league.

[A]

Yep.

[B]

You gotta go.

[A]

Congratulations. Go to history. Hyenas is back. Dot com. See your name up in lights. You are the this week's winner. Kid Rock Looks like Jesus of Methlehem. Beautiful. Every week. Thanks for the support.

[B]

Mountain View Equipment. Modelos.

[C]

Modelos.

[B]

Masgarantia de seisanos.

[A]

Compren?

[B]

Mountain view equipment.

[A]

Equinta konunaquipo.

[C]

Local

[A]

eco puntokom.

[B]

Cajoti travahamos latiera. Mountain view equipment. Contiguan calapas.