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Chrissy Chaos
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Giannis Pappas
That was Shaq, bro. I was protecting Shaq.
Chrissy Chaos
Wait, what?
Giannis Pappas
I didn't know Shaq was with me on that trip.
Pac Man Jones
Protecting Shaq. Who's. Who needs to protect Shaq.
Chrissy Chaos
Sa.
Pac Man Jones
Because Japanese just sounds like you're lifting boxes and you throw out your back.
Chrissy Chaos
It's what it is. Because. And even though I do love and support the Japanese culture, make absolutely zero mistake, if I eat sushi, I do do it with a fork.
Pac Man Jones
Yes, you do.
Chrissy Chaos
A chopstick is disrespectful to my grandpa who fought the Japanese in World War II, and I won't disrespect him by using chopsticks. But I do really like the food because make no mistake, fish is healthy.
Pac Man Jones
Because we're going to talk about the samurais today in the samurai culture, and we're not going to do it by bringing in someone from the Wu Tang Clan. We're going to bring in someone later who's got a leak rook Pac Man Jones. So stick around for that. Yes, but blacks do love samurai culture and the Japanese now do love black culture. They're very good at breakdancing. Yes, there's something about those two cultures that they just love each other.
Chrissy Chaos
They love each other. Now we have a wild episode for you today. We're going to take you through the history of the samurais. We're also going to talk about the very first and maybe only ever black samurai besides RZA from the Wu Tang Clan. And we're also going to talk to you about the 47 Ronin, the true story of the 47 Ronin. These are two wild stories. So you're going to want to stick around. And then, as Gianna said, Pac Man Jones is coming in and it's. We might, both Giannis and I might get punched in the face because we did pre. Before the episode started. We did, we did Piss in a cup. And we're going to see if he wants to buy it off us because the kid likes to use other people's urine to pass drug tests in the NFL.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. If you don't know who Pac Man Jonah Jones is, he's a. He was a former cornerback in the NFL. His resume in football is extensive, but not as extensive as his incarceration record. Yeah, the kid has really racked up a resume. I think the last time he got arrested was 20, 20, 24.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, it's. It's what it is.
Pac Man Jones
So he's still wild.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, he gets arrested now. Japan, as you know. You know, Japan is. It's this country.
Pac Man Jones
It's an island.
Chrissy Chaos
It's an island. It was an isolationist nation for very long time. They just cut themselves off, which is the rest of the world. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Because the rest of Asia, you know, didn't do that. No, but I mean, they also, like, you know, they're like, if they were isolationist and how did all those other Japanese looking people get all around that place?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, I don't understand.
Pac Man Jones
I don't understand how that happened.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, because when I. Yeah, because you.
Pac Man Jones
Look at the Aborigines, they come from little islands and stuff, they look different because they were isolated. But the Japanese, it's like they're all over Asia. They look like that.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, it's one of those things where it's like, look, I'll get. I understand, I understand that other countries, you know, have different cultures and all that stuff, but I mean, because if you're Asian, I mean, it's just. You really don't know. Japanese, Chinese, Korean, they know. Yeah, they know the difference.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
But I can't tell the difference at all. The one thing, only thing I know is Japanese got their hair up in a bunch and Koreans and Chinese like bangs. That's what I know the difference is. But they all do wear sandals and hover with their asshole a millimeter off the floor to smoke cigarettes in the back of restaurants.
Pac Man Jones
That's what they do.
Chrissy Chaos
That's all.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, they're compact people, they're hairless people, and.
Chrissy Chaos
And they're beautiful people and they love chopsticks and soup.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. But at different times in history, they're no different from any of the rest of humanity. And that's why we love doing this show, because we go through history, we show that we're all the same. We all got leaky roofs, humanity acts the same. History is brutal. And it's gay, and it's gay. And there's a lot of gay. The samurais are fucking each other.
Chrissy Chaos
There's nothing we can. Yes, that's true.
Pac Man Jones
That's true.
Chrissy Chaos
And we're going to talk about that. They did have sex with each other. And listen, it's just one of those things. Asian people, again, I respect them, I like them, their food is different and they have things in common with. Like I said, they typically have. Have a very distinct look. I know Asian people can tell other Asians apart, but if we're going to be honest, white people really can't and black people really can't tell other Asians apart. It's very difficult. So they do look alike. They do have. They are very family oriented people, which is a beautiful thing. And they also do get money subsidized from their government to beat us in the housing war. And they buy the houses in cash and the mortgage rates don't affect them. And I do keep getting bought out. I keep getting outbid on homes by other Asian people. And that's just a simple fact. It's an s. Low KS That's. They're not fighting fair, right?
Pac Man Jones
They don't fight fair.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
And that's the thing about the whole samurai culture that we're going to talk about is like, okay, everyone knows the samurais. Everyone. It's become part of pop culture. People love myth. The myth, the mythology of samurais, like honor I'm gonna do. But they were just brutal. No different than the brutality of knights in medieval Europe. You know, they had, you know, oh, chivalry. The myth of the chivalrous knight. There's like the myth of the honorable samurai. These guys were murderers. They would lop off heads of kids, lop off heads of women, lop off kids of dogs and cats. And I'm an American and I'm a dog lover, much like a white lady. Once you start lopping off the heads of dogs, you lose me. Yeah. I can lop off white men all you want, but once you lop off a dog, then that's it.
Chrissy Chaos
You know that it's not okay. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
It's like Michael Vick will always be worse to me than Charles Manson because he hurt dogs. Yes.
Chrissy Chaos
And so Charles Manson actually never killed anyone.
Pac Man Jones
He never killed anyone.
Chrissy Chaos
Now that's a. That's a truth. Bader Ginsburg.
Pac Man Jones
No, no.
Chrissy Chaos
Now here's the leaky roof. Leaky roof. Now, samurai, the word samurai means to serve.
Pac Man Jones
Yes.
Chrissy Chaos
Now samurais, you know, the show shogun is very popular right now in fx. And. And they do a good job. Shogun of going through some of the, you know, specific points in history of, you know, shoguns are like different classes of samurai. And so samurai, you know, it means to serve. And they had their famous sword, the katana. So they were good with swords. They were good fighters.
Pac Man Jones
Katana.
Chrissy Chaos
Katana.
Pac Man Jones
Have you looked at houses in katana?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, because I keep getting outbid by the Chinese. So. So they. So they had these swords and they were very, very good duelers and fighters, just like any other warrior classroom history. But they were also bureaucratic because they were also in government and they were also smart, smart kids. So. And they were trained people. These kids were trained as little kids. Samurai. And then they grew up and they were just that warrior class and they were qqq.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, they ended up becoming more administrative. Administrative after the gun came to Japan via the Portuguese.
Chrissy Chaos
But yeah, by the way, the Portuguese we're going to do more episodes on. They were bad people back then. They were bad. They brough slavery to the pretty much the United States. You could trace that back. And they brought guns to Japan. So I do want to start attacking the Portuguese a little bit here on this show.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. Have you ever noticed that Portugal just kind of looks like the Gaza Strip of Spain?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
When you look at a map.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
It's just like a little strip in there.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. You know, if you took a boat due east from New York City and it didn't veer, of course you would hit Portugal. We're in the same latitude. They're the New York City of the east.
Pac Man Jones
That's a nice little what you call HHFOD for you geography buffs out there.
Chrissy Chaos
That's what it is.
Pac Man Jones
So the samurai, they started.
Chrissy Chaos
We are the geography girls.
Pac Man Jones
We are the geography girls. The samurai, they start out in Japanese culture as there's Japan is a mountainous island, you know, hard to conquer, hard to unite. Right. So there is this emperor and the samurai start out as sort of tax collectors for the emperor. They got to go up in the mountains and shake down these peasants, get their rice, make sure they're paying their due, you know, kind of dirt bags. Then the samurai, who are these trained killers decide, hey man, we're the toughest guys around. We should start running stuff.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
So they start taking control and they take control from the emperor and the emperor becomes more of just a figurehead, not really in power. And these different samurai warlords just start running shit. Just like the knights. They're basically Asia's knights. Yes, that's what they are in the feudal Japan world.
Chrissy Chaos
Yes, they are, basically, if you think about the Knights Templar, but they like to sit on the floor.
Pac Man Jones
They take their shoes off, which is nice. Going to the house. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Because if you want. I think it's best off to keep a Japanese household where you just take your shoes and socks off and you sit on the floor. Yeah, that's nice.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, that's what. That's what they did. That's the only difference. And, you know. Yeah. I mean, their faces are a little different. Most people theorize that Asian faces are that way because of the cold weather, the distribution of the face.
Chrissy Chaos
Is that true?
Pac Man Jones
Or the dust in the eyes. Yeah. Or like the sandstorms or whatever. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
So you're. So you're saying that's how Japanese. That's how Asian faces were formed? Because I thought it was because they were in the sun most of the time. Dead serious.
Pac Man Jones
That's. That. That's another theory as well. But it's all evolutionary. There's actually a couple of African tribes that also have the. That extra lip on the eye.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
I don't know what it's called, but it's like. Yeah. They said for the same reasons, they feel like they evolved that way to keep the sun out of their face or the dust out of their face or whatever.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Pac Man Jones
So we're all the same. We just evolved differently.
Chrissy Chaos
That's what it is.
Pac Man Jones
We're lighter skinned because we want to absorb more vitamin D. Right. Or something like that. And then the blacks are black because.
Chrissy Chaos
It was hot and they have more melanin.
Pac Man Jones
They got more melanin.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. So because I think the blacks culture. I think that because Africa was. Is. Does get more sun, so their skin had to evolve. So it's just evolutionary stuff.
Pac Man Jones
And then the Indians took the darker skin, but also white people's hair because nobody knows.
Chrissy Chaos
And it's just what it is.
Pac Man Jones
It's just like they're a combo of both.
Chrissy Chaos
And that's why they're my favorite porn category.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, they.
Chrissy Chaos
That's why they call me Chrissy Calcutta. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So. Okay. Because. So the samurais, I mean, now they're warlords. They're warlords. And they are. The thing is about them is they really get popular Samurai, like in later years, like Staten Island, New York, when.
Pac Man Jones
The Wu Tang Clang formed.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. I mean, Sergio Chacon asked to come on this show today, and we should have had him on because he loves Wu Tang and he could have talked about samurai. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
He loves Wu Tang and South American revolutionaries who are communists.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. Sergio Chacon is going to win, is going to come on the show probably next week. And we shout out to all the people who are@patreon.com history making the funniest, the absolute funniest AI generated memes Giannis and I have ever seen in our life. We post them periodically on Instagram. That is all from patreon.com history hyenas. Now they're getting Sergio involved in them, and they are 10 out of absolute tents.
Pac Man Jones
They're funny. And also, if you're in New York and you want to train, you want to box, Sergio does it in Westchester and New York. Just hit him up on the gram. He doesn't have a business card.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, he doesn't have a business card because he's just Sergio Chacon. And this is just how they are.
Pac Man Jones
It's just. It's what it is. Different cultures have different things.
Chrissy Chaos
Different cultures have different things. But I will tell you, cuz, Sergio Chacon, he does live. He does have Japanese wisdom to him, because when you talk to the kid, Sergio Chacon, he's lived a tumultuous life at times, and he's learned a lot, and he's been sober 10 years. And I just give the kid a lot of credit because every time I talk to him, he knows how to come from a place of balance and peace and wisdom. And I respect that.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, it's very respectable.
Chrissy Chaos
I do. I respect it because he's a Puerto Rican samurai. He's one of those things that when you talk, when you're texting with him, you say, this. This man has the wisdom, truly, of an Asian man, if you didn't know what he was. And then if you talk to him on the phone, you're like, I'm talking to Rosie Perez.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, he does have a thick accent. Yeah, yeah. So samurai's civil war. I mean, it's just constant civil war in Japan. They're all fighting, and samurais are fighting each other, right? And they train from when they're little and they got these swords, like Chrissy said, and they were made in a special way where they just kept folding them and folding them and folding them and folding them till they, like, had all this nice flexibility. And they were these special swords and they were good at taking off people's heads, which these kids, the Japanese love heads, but not in the way you think. They love giving head, but not in the way you think.
Chrissy Chaos
Not the way you think. Even though it's one of those things they love and it's really kind of. It's tough for me to understand because they do love chopping off heads, but yet they don't love giving heads, AKA blowjobs, Even though they always have their hair up in a bun, which is the universal symbol if I want to suck your cock.
Pac Man Jones
It's a very good point.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
They always do have their hair kind of up.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Even the samurais, like, had their hair tied back.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. And it's one of those things where, if I'm going to be honest with you, is I did order a full samurai alpha for us, but it's not coming to March 26th. So what we're going to do is throw on that outfit and talk about a completely different topic in about two weeks. But we are just going to have our samurai outfits on.
Pac Man Jones
Now, the samurais. Yeah, they did. They thought pure love was between man and man.
Chrissy Chaos
Is that truly what they believe?
Pac Man Jones
True.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
And so. And they didn't trust the women. It was more. A lot of the marriages or whatever, relationships were kind of. Yeah. Political or whatever. And the real pure love was man on man.
Giannis Pappas
Sure.
Pac Man Jones
So it was said that even samurai slept with their swords by their bed just so they. Because they were so very skeptical and paranoid about the woman killing them.
Chrissy Chaos
So in other words, the kids love sword fights in more ways than one.
Pac Man Jones
They love to sword fight more way than. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
So that's the way you could just.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, yeah. They're like, are we having an honorable fight with swords? Which ones?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Which ones are swords between our legs or our metal?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. It's one of those things where they're one of the only cultures where after just a nice fight with the Katan is a fight to the death, they would just kiss each other on the lips a little.
Pac Man Jones
They did.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
They were really fashionable. They wore these, like, leather outfits and they looked really cool. And some of them even painted their faces and wore makeup. One of the most brutal samurais, actually, they said, often looked like a girl because he wore so much makeup and lipstick because he wanted to look good. They wanted to look good in case they were killed. They put incense in their helmets just in case their heads got lopped off. They wanted their head to smell nice.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
For the guy that killed them and presented their head to whatever warlord they were serving.
Chrissy Chaos
That was a big thing in Japanese culture, is they did believe a lot in honor. Everything was about honor, honor, honor. In Japan. It still is. It's all about honor. So there's a story I want to talk to you about. Do you know the story of the 47 Ronin.
Pac Man Jones
Tell the people about it.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay, so first of all, let me tell you what a Ronin is.
Pac Man Jones
Now, was that a movie that, like, Matt Damon played an Asian guy? Because I know people got upset about that.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, no, I don't know. That was the one where he just. It was something. That one was called like the Great Wall of China where it was just Matt Damon running around with a Chinese haircut.
Pac Man Jones
Nat, that's really funny that they chose Matt David or I think one of them was Tom Cruise. Was it Tom Cruise or Matt David?
Chrissy Chaos
Tom Cru. Tom Cruz was the Last Samurai.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, he's the last Samurai and he's just. They. He made him an Asian guy.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, it's just what it is. Well, Tom, because here's what they do.
Pac Man Jones
Al Wong wasn't available yet.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, it's. Yeah, she just wasn't available yet. Yeah. And it's just what it is that she. And they did give her the part, but then they. She asked too many guys to sign NDAs way song. Okay, so.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
So here's the thing. Yeah. Is.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay. Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Oh, yeah. So Patty the Fatty's coming in. Cuz, make no mistake, if Patty the Fatty, AKA Patty Clips, AKA Patty Sama was around in ancient Japan, they. Instead of cutting off his head, they would have cut off his butt. Yeah. They would have just offered his butt. Just get that butt in. Get that butt in the wide shot.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Cuz, I mean, make no mistake, you better hide that butt from Pac Man Jones when he walks in. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Thank you. What's. What's your name, hun?
Pac Man Jones
Morgan.
Chrissy Chaos
Morgan is our new beautiful intern here. Morgan's doing a great job. Goddess. The goddess to raps. Morgan's an NYU student and she's going to learn a lot from Pat. But make no mistake, Pat's going to learn a lot from her because the girl went to NYU and Pat went to community college on Staten Island.
Pac Man Jones
That's just what it is.
Chrissy Chaos
So this girl's going to teach Patty.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. Pac Man Joan gets here, he's probably going to hit on her.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, it's.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, it's just what it is. We got Pacman Jones coming in.
Chrissy Chaos
Thank you, Morgan. Appreciate it. Do you have the Bay Ridge Boys card? I don't want to lose that. Do you have it, Pat? You got the card? Because what happens is in my family, I'll give my girlfriend my credit card and then I never see it again.
Pac Man Jones
That's right.
Chrissy Chaos
I never see it again. But I do. Then I just do have Thousands of dollars in charges from the store. Rainbow.
Pac Man Jones
If you're from New York, you get that.
Chrissy Chaos
What is Puerto Rican? Girls love Rainbow and Mandy's.
Pac Man Jones
They love Mandy's and Rainbow. And if they're shopping for boys, like I said, Modell's is pue. Puerto Rican. Bloomingdale's.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
But models did go out of stock. Models went out of business. Business in the New York area. And that was a very, very sad day. I honestly think that was an even worse day than when Tony Hinchcliffe called it the island of Gomez. Yeah, more people were upset about that.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, it's tough.
Chrissy Chaos
They were saying when I asked Liz, you know, my. My mother in law, I said, do you care if Tony is to the island of Gom? She goes, no, it doesn't matter. I just wanted to reopen Model so I could buy my son a shirt.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, it was. It's. It's. That was almost as sad in the Puerto Rican culture as when one of the guys loses a snake. If he loses a snake, it's tough for them.
Chrissy Chaos
It's tough for them.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. If he crawls into the walls, it's tough.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay, so let me tell you about the 47 Ronin. This has been made into different movies and, you know, different in pop culture, but it's a wild story. So what a ronin actually is what that word means is. It is. It is a. A masterless samurai. It's basically a samurai because they are samurai. One thing about them is they are locked into one master their whole life, like an avatar. When they connect with that flying creature, that's what samurais are. They are locked into one master. And when that master dies, a lot of samurais would commit seppuku. Seppuku. How do you say it? Seppukuku. Yeah, sudoku. Sudoku, which is them killing themselves, honorably killing themselves. So the 47 Ronin. Okay, so this story. So a ronin is a masterless samurai. Some of these guys who don't honor kill themselves. Then they're called ronin. They're walking around, they have the strength and skills of a samurai, but they got no master. So they're just out there. So there was this guy. I'm gonna take you to 1701. Okay? There was this guy, Lord Asano Naganuri, and he was the daimo of Eiko. What a daimo is, is like a basically like a little like kingdom within a kingdom. It's like, you know, we got the kingdom of Japan, but then the daimo are like the different big time ruling families. Like, you know, The Gotti's would be daimos of queens. So what he did Edo Castle Ito is modern day Japan. So there was 1701, we're in Edo, aka Japan. And this guy, Lord Asano Naganori, he had. He had this big party at this Edo castle. And this guy, Kira Yoshinaka, who was a high ranking court official, got into a fight with Asano, Got into like a big fight. People don't really know what it was about. Some people say it was because Kira, Kira wanted to like, you know, him to pay like a debt. And Asana was like, I don't owe you that money, blah, blah, blah, blah. But let's be honest, because samurais, as we've educated you on it, was probably something gay, right? It was probably some type of unwanted advance or was one of those things was like, how about I tell your wife that you like it in the butt, right? You know, right. That you like me. That that's just what it is. Because you like a little chopstick in the ass.
Pac Man Jones
Yes.
Chrissy Chaos
So, so what happened was, is they got into a fight and Asano attacks Kira with a sword inside the Shogun's palace, which is a.
Pac Man Jones
No, no, whoa.
Chrissy Chaos
You can not do that. You can't be having beef like that inside the sacred palace, especially pulling out your sword. You can't pull out your bladed sword. You could pull out your sword, but that's got to be in the bathroom behind closed doors, right? Pull out, you know. So Sana was immediately by the high courts, sentenced to Sepkut. He immediately was like, what it is? You gotta now honor kill yourself. That's what you gotta do. And so he honor kills himself. And the people think, okay, fine, you know what it happens. This is our law. This is what happens in Japan. Gotta honor kill yourself. What can you do? It's absolute chaos. But the people of Kira Yoshinaka's people take it even further. For some reason, they make him confident. They take all his lands, they take his family lands, and then they leave his samurais all with no, not only no master, but now no land. So they basically are made them Ronan.
Pac Man Jones
The Robert De Niro's in that movie?
Chrissy Chaos
Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Pac Man Jones
There was a movie named Ronin with Roberto.
Chrissy Chaos
Was it about samurai?
Pac Man Jones
No. Oh, I think it was just his name.
Chrissy Chaos
So what happened was. So what happened was, is these kids just. It's very similar kind of how if Donald Trump would have just pardoned Biden on the way out, there wouldn't be so many problem. I'm sorry. If Joe Biden would have pardoned Donald Trump on the way out. There wouldn't be so many issues. But now Donald Trump's on warpath and he's trying to reverse Biden's pardons because he said he signed it with an auto pen. And it's just one of these things where it's like power and ego taints everything. Because all Kira Yoshinaka had to do was say, you know what? You attacked me. Now Asano's got to commit suicide and that's it. But he wanted a step further. Took his land, took his samurais. And then the samurais who are under Asano Naganori say, okay, you know what? Asano Naganori had a brother. They say, why don't we just, how about this? Let his brother be our leader. Let his brother be our leader. He disrespected you. His brother won't. His brother's a good kid. Blah, blah, blah, blah. So, Asana, the names are hard to remember. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Japanese 1. Japanese 2. Japanese 3.
Chrissy Chaos
So head Japanese. The top Japanese guy. The top Japanese. Yeah. Ichiro, the top Japanese guy. Well, show Ohtani. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Ohtani said, Tamatsui.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The TJ to top. So, so, so, so he says, they think we're gonna let the brother of the guy who had to commit seppuku, he's gonna be our new leader. So instead what they do is they go back to Edo castle thinking, oh, they'll let the brother, you know, in front of the high council, they'll let the brother be our new samurai. All will be good. They put the brother in prison. They say, fuck you. Now the brother's in prison. So now you got these warriors who are like, who are all about honor and respect. And there was a system in Japan, a vengeance system, where if you felt you were wrong, they would legally allow you to seek vengeance through a couple of steps. But they were like, these guys are not letting us do that for some reason. So 47, there was a lot of samurai, like 200 plus. And most of them just agreed with the new penalty. They said, we'll be ronin. We won't cause any more trouble. But 47 Ronin, 47 guys led by Oshi Kurosunoku. So the plotted revenge for over a year. The kid was angry, okay? The kid was mad. And what he did was he pretended in his life. He pretended to be poor, dishonorable, a drunk. The kid's just pretending to just be a piece of shit. Cuz he doesn't want anyone looking into what he's actually Plotting. So he just made believe that he was like any other samurai that was disgraced, just a scumbag, you know, in the bowels of Ito aka Tokyo. But then on December 14, 1702, they launched a surprise attack on Kira's mansion. And they killed him and of course, cut his head off. Right, they cut the kid's head right off, because that's what they have to do. And they brought it to the grave of Asano. And they said, look, we did this for you. They showed the brother the head. They said, we cut the kid's head off. And so you think, okay, what most people do is they say, you know, we revenged our leader, blah, blah, blah, we cut the kid's head off. Now we're. We're all good to go. But again, because Japan is all about honor, and samurais especially all about honor, what they do is they go to the High Council, basically the people that they, you know, went against, and they say, look, here's what we did. We fucking broke into the castle, we cut off Kira's head, We just cut his head off. And now we're going to show you that we did it. So what we're going to do for you is you don't even have to tell us. We're just all going to kill ourselves in front of you.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
47 of them just right there in the steps of the thing, just take their sword and plunge them into their chest and they all kill themselves in front of the Japanese council. And it's just one of those things where, you know, most kids wouldn't do that, but the Japanese are committed. I mean, you. Because you could have a direct line from that to the kamikazes.
Pac Man Jones
Yes, yes.
Chrissy Chaos
You really can do.
Pac Man Jones
Actually, that's what it is. Yeah. I mean, it's just that that's in the culture of the Japanese that starts with the samurai, where the kids just had leaky roofs.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Pac Man Jones
And they like to kill themselves.
Chrissy Chaos
They just did.
Pac Man Jones
They just like to off themselves if they felt like they dishonored themselves.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. And I got to be honest with you, if jazz doesn't allow me just rent and not buy, the kid might go full Japanese and take his shoes and socks off and do a little seu.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
At a family party. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
And the way they did it, too, was particularly grueling because they felt like the soul was in the middle of the body. So they would stab themselves in the middle of the body with their sword like this. So they would slowly bleed out. It'd be a very gruesome and they did that to show their honor and their dedication and their strength. And they also had a good friend nearby, guy, in case, like, so there was always another guy right there. So in case you. You got cold feet or you couldn't do it or you didn't, you know, do it right, then the guy would just lop off your head and he. It was a friendly thing to do. Yeah, it was. And that's where the leaky roof comes.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Pac Man Jones
It's like I would, you know that you're such a good friend.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
So the head would roll off, and then the head would look at the friend and go, thank you.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, thank you for being such a good. I really appreciate that. You're a nice daughter.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
So, cuz. Okay, so the 47 Ronin, I mean, it's a wild. It's a while.
Pac Man Jones
That is a wild.
Chrissy Chaos
It's a wild story how the guys just want to kill themselves and do this. But this is just. In Jap guys do. I mean, even still to this day, Japan, Japanese men specifically identify themselves so much with their careers that when. At the end of their career, when they retire, a lot of them just kill themselves. That's why when Logan Paul made that video in, like, these woods where guys just go to kill themselves, it's because this has been the culture from day one. They're like, look, they. They don't fear death like that. They don't think like in with us with. With Catholic Christian kids, if we kill ourselves, we think we're going to purgatory. But not them.
Pac Man Jones
No.
Chrissy Chaos
If they kill themselves, they think they're going to the bento box in the sky, baby.
Pac Man Jones
They do.
Chrissy Chaos
And they.
Pac Man Jones
They believe if they have an honorable death, then they'll. It'll be good. And if they have a dishonorable death or whatever, that their punishment will be. They'll be reborn as a samurai.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. It's just samurais are big now. Did you know. Here's another fun fact that I want.
Giannis Pappas
To give to you.
Chrissy Chaos
Did you know that there was a.
Pac Man Jones
Black samurai that wasn't Method Man? Yes, exactly.
Chrissy Chaos
That was in Ghostface Killer.
Pac Man Jones
Right.
Chrissy Chaos
Did you know that there was a black samurai that didn't live in Staten Island?
Pac Man Jones
That's so.
Chrissy Chaos
In the Park Hill project.
Pac Man Jones
That's wild. It's sort of like, you know, I think we've had a few Asians in the NBA, and so you would think that a couple blacks would become samurai. Yes, but it's not a lot, right?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. Because right now you could say, oh, There's a black samurai that plays for the Lakers, Right? I know that's just a black Japanese kid.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
That's on the team.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. What's his name?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. Yashimoto. So it's just what it is, cousin. It's not being racist. I just. Japanese names are hard, just like their names would be hard for us.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Do you think a Japanese guy could just say jeff, easy. I don't think he can.
Pac Man Jones
No. It's not easy for them to tell us apart.
Chrissy Chaos
So I want to tell you the story of a man that's been. Now, this guy's been debated in history. Some guys. Some people say he was a samurai. Some people say he was a retainer, which was like a guy that worked for the samurais, but wasn't. Wasn't. You know, at that level. His name was Yasuke. So, Yasuke. So who this kid was, was. First of all, he was a black African kid that came to Japan once again, through a Portuguese guy. There was a tal. It was Italian guy. His name was Alessandro Valignano, and he was a Jesuit missionary working for Portugal. Portugal loves slaves.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Black people more than any other country. You have to accept that.
Pac Man Jones
They just did.
Chrissy Chaos
Again, I know the white people. I know that we're bad in history. I know we're bad, bad, bad. But we got to start talking about how Portugal is just was involved in the slave market in a big way.
Pac Man Jones
Huge.
Chrissy Chaos
Huge. So Yasuke is this man. Now a lot of people are saying, you automatically think, this black kid, he's with an Italian kid. He must be a slave. But he wasn't. He came over as just somebody who was working with this guy, Alessandro Valignano. So he comes in, and now he's a black kid coming to Japan. There's not many of them. So the village goes nuts. The village that they originally bring him to. I forgot what the village was that they broug to, but they. They bring him to this village. And I mean, people are, like, pushing each other out of the way. They can't wait to see. It's probably like when Brittney Griner went into the Russian prison.
Pac Man Jones
Right.
Chrissy Chaos
Nobody could believe what this thing was.
Pac Man Jones
Right.
Chrissy Chaos
Right. They were like, holy shit. They never seen it because they were just sitting there quiet, like they were getting like. Like Zelinsky getting yelled at by Trump.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
They were just, oh, my God.
Pac Man Jones
It's like when I went to Montenegro with my college friend, and they just. It was before, really, the Internet, and they just were pointing at him going, Michael Jordan. They'd Never seen a black guy. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
So this kid. So Yasuke comes in. It's about 1579. He comes in and he's just like, unbelievable. And the head guy right now was this guy, Oda Nobunaga. He was like the top guy in Japan. Now he was also known. They used to call him like the devil leader because the kid was bad news. He was a real piece of shit. He would boil people alive. He would behead monks, women, children. As a matter of fact, I'm going to get to the story of when Abu Naga eventually causes a civil war. It's because one of the samurai who. You know, samurais, even though they're honor and they're only loyal to their leader, when he was basically, Abu Naga was making this. These samurais behead women and children. They're like, yo, fuck this guy. We're gonna rebel. So Yasuke and Abunaga strike up this wild friendship. Abunaga, who would, you know is this top guy, is obsessed with Yasuke. They're like this.
Pac Man Jones
This kid's the best.
Chrissy Chaos
And so they say he was like an unbelievable fighter. In many of these Japanese civil wars, Yasuke was like front lines, just absolutely crushing people. Because the kid was 6'1 6'two black, so, you know, they're stronger. And he was just able to fucking wield a sword. People don't really know how he learned it. They think he must have been. He had to have been a warrior in whatever country he was from. There's not many records of him because you can't just learn. You can't just get to the level of samurai without being like elite, beyond elite.
Pac Man Jones
Right now, if you're a black guy and you're fighting samurai style back then you're probably going to want to talk 100. Because you don't want the dick swinging because swords can get it.
Chrissy Chaos
Well, that's what I was gonna.
Pac Man Jones
That was good for the Japanese because the swords, maybe the dicks are so small. So, you know, like. Yeah, the way a bulldog's face is mashed in so it can fight, maybe the dick is small so the sword can't get it. So it evolved that.
Chrissy Chaos
That's very true. And you know what? And maybe that's why.
Pac Man Jones
Very true.
Chrissy Chaos
And maybe that's why you saw you. Yasuke was so much better as a samurai and could learn it so quick because the kid had three swords. He had his connoisseur. He had another sword that they always had, and then he just had his dick and he. We just fucking. I mean, Cuz if you got a big black like dick from Mozambique, you can easily hit a five, get them off their feet, easy. Knock the wind out, right?
Pac Man Jones
Well, you can definitely. Yeah, it's definitely like a diversion. Like, where's the sword? Is it down there? Is it up there? He's looking at multiple swords.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
It's like I'm seeing double.
Chrissy Chaos
Now here's the thing with samurai, too. Now here's the thing. Here's why a lot of people debate there's no way this kid could have been actual samurai. Because a lot of people said you had to be born into this culture, like a Hasidic Jew.
Pac Man Jones
Right?
Chrissy Chaos
Even though they said Amar E. Stonemay is a Jew, now, he's not Hasidic.
Pac Man Jones
Right.
Chrissy Chaos
So you could be Japanese and be in the culture, but you can't actually be a samurai. So it's debatable. A lot of people say. They say that somebody wrote a book, a white guy wrote a book in like, the 1800s and made this guy a samurai. When Japanese historians are saying this guy was not a samurai, we don't claim him as samurai. We believe he existed. But the kid wasn't a samurai. But he was. He served Nobunaga faithfully. He definitely fought in a lot of these battles. He was always there. And the reason why this is wild is because at the end of Nabu Naga, at the end of Nobunaga's life. Life, 1582, as I said, the kid Nabunaga caused a civil war because he was just a ruthless, like, devil king was like a piece of. He really was.
Pac Man Jones
He was like Winston Churchill.
Chrissy Chaos
Yes, yes, exactly. Which you'll hear all about on Joe Rogan.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, you can hear that all about on Daryl Cooper's podcast.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay, he's here. Yes, Give him. Tell him two minutes. Two minutes. So. So Pac Man Jones is here, so we better go through this blank Samurai quit. So. So Nobunaga kills himself. He commits seppuku because he's being cornered. So rather than being killed by the enemy, he kills himself because again, honorable, who cares? And then at the end, he gives instructions to Yasuke. This is a big honor. He gives instructions to Yasuke. Listen, I'm gonna kill myself. I'm gonna commit seppukuku, so I'm gonna commit sudoku.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
So he says to Yasuke, when I'm dead, I want you to cut my head off and bring it to my side. My son. Cut my head off right now and bring it to my son, which was the honorable thing to do. Because like you said, these kids have leaky roofs.
Pac Man Jones
I mean, it's just a hole in the roof.
Chrissy Chaos
It's a hole in the roof. So. So Yasuke chops his head off and he gives it to Obanaga's son, which was an honor.
Pac Man Jones
Which was honorable thing, which was honor.
Chrissy Chaos
Give the kid his. Just give him my head. Like, how my dad's gonna leave me a sweater? It would be back then it's like, yeah, your head, dad.
Pac Man Jones
That kid, he's as happy as a kid on Christmas who got a PlayStation.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, the kid just loved it with his pop's head. Head. So. But what happens then is Abu Naga's enemies, of course, storm in, they don't care. And instead of killing Yasuke, which they would have as the other samurais, honorable, and make them commit seppuku, they just give Yasuke back to the Jesuits, back to the Portuguese, and let him leave. So that's why a lot of scholars, Japanese people are saying there's no way he was a samurai because a. He would have gotten this title of ronin because he's a masterless samurai. So he didn't get that. And. And he was so valueless to the Japanese at that time that they just gave him back to the Portuguese. So that's why people don't. Don't debate it. But it is one month after Black History Month, and I want to say that I do think Yatsuke was a samurai.
Pac Man Jones
Yes.
Chrissy Chaos
Even though technically he wasn't.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. Wu Tang Clang ain't nothing to fuck with.
Chrissy Chaos
So speaking of blacks with leaky rouge, we're going to bring in Pac Man Jones.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
All right, here we go. We have the man himself, Pac, as the host of Pac Man Jones show on Bedded Online. Because that's what your manager Val, or your wife Tish told us to say. Yes.
Giannis Pappas
Hey, that was a great punchline right there.
Chrissy Chaos
That's it. Well, now, because we wanted to know, because black guys typically like to have a family member be their manager or agent when they're professional athletes. So what is that about?
Giannis Pappas
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You have people that is qualified for the job over here. Where we at?
Pac Man Jones
You dipping right now? Yeah, I like that. I like that in there too. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Trying to get off this, but I've been dipping so long.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, nice.
Giannis Pappas
Cuz I started dipping because I couldn't stay up in the meetings and they was finding me.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Like $10,000. Every time I go to sleep, my coach was like, bro, you got to Put the dip in his mic.
Chrissy Chaos
Can you lower it?
Giannis Pappas
He's like, bro, you got to put a dip in. So I was.
Chrissy Chaos
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Kept me up.
Pac Man Jones
Did you dip while you were playing football? Yeah, yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
You have to.
Giannis Pappas
I play games with like pouches in.
Pac Man Jones
You did, right?
Chrissy Chaos
You know why I think you are a great, great because obviously amazing skill level, but you just like, you, you, you were just like going with the flow. Like, you were just like, you'll dip, you'll play with your chains like it's you. Like, I know, like sometimes when I would watch you, I'd be like, I wonder if he gets worried if like someone's going to tug on it or whatever. And you like, dude, I just go.
Giannis Pappas
Nah, bro, I live my life without a seat belt. You know what I mean?
Chrissy Chaos
I respect that.
Giannis Pappas
By on fair catch the ball.
Chrissy Chaos
That's it.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Now, yeah, I like that. I like to live life in the fast lane. That's pretty good.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you do, you, you kind of do things your own way and you've always done things your own way and so what do you think about the NFL? Is it too strict when it comes to players and, you know, smoking weed and what they do off? I mean, it's just like if you perform well, you perform well. Right? Babe Ruth used to play drunk. Mickey drunk.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
I think it should be all drugs allowed out.
Giannis Pappas
I don't know about all drugs.
Pac Man Jones
Why not? Wouldn't that be great to play on crystal meth?
Chrissy Chaos
The Nazis did it.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Oh, no. Aaron Rogers played on ayahuasca.
Pac Man Jones
Taking ayahuasca.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
I mean, what does it matter? I think we even said like baseball would be good if there was a guy on the sidelines with a gun and he was just randomly firing out on the field. Seriously, that would make a little more movement happen.
Chrissy Chaos
We're also for an all steroid league. Yeah, yeah. Why the not let. Hey, Pac man, listen, listen, America, we're about entertainment here. So why not just get everybody on the Juice and see what happens?
Giannis Pappas
I don't know about that. But I like to entertain too though, right?
Chrissy Chaos
At least baseball get them all on the juice.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, baseball should definitely be on the Juice.
Chrissy Chaos
And then give one player an inning in aluminum bat and have the pitcher put on a football helmet just in case you don't want the guy to get killed and let somebody hit an 800 foot home run. And you know, and fans can pay extra money to sit in a seat where they could possibly catch a ball. That's 800 foot. Feet.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, I think so.
Chrissy Chaos
I think so.
Pac Man Jones
And how come there's not more sumo wrestlers on the offensive line?
Giannis Pappas
It's a lot of them out there. It's just they don't claim to be sumo wrestlers.
Pac Man Jones
That's true.
Chrissy Chaos
But they were fat Japanese guys. Yeah, yeah. Now Pac man, how you. How long are you in New York for?
Giannis Pappas
I'm here till tomorrow. I've been here like two days. Yeah, it's packed around here too. It's take an hour to get from here to fifth Ave. Down there.
Chrissy Chaos
Where cuz you're from what? West Virginia?
Pac Man Jones
Atlanta.
Giannis Pappas
Cincinnati.
Chrissy Chaos
Cincinnati.
Giannis Pappas
Well, I'm from Atlanta. Sorry, sorry. Living in Cincinnati and Atlanta.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Went to West Virginia though.
Chrissy Chaos
You went to West Virginia? Yeah. Because I feel like a lot of times people come to New York and it's too much for them, but I feel like not you, you would fit in in our city.
Giannis Pappas
I could fit in anywhere. You know what I mean? I'm. I'm very adaptable. Is if. If that's the word.
Pac Man Jones
That is.
Chrissy Chaos
That is the word 100%.
Giannis Pappas
What's the word? Maneuvers. So like I'm, I'm. I can go anywhere and hold a conversation or, or live or whatever I need to do because I've been around a lot of different genres, I should say.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, you've done a lot, right? So for, you know, he was a wrestler for a while.
Chrissy Chaos
100, of course, 2,000. The kid.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, yeah. Was that TNA?
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
It was like 2007, 2008. Right. I remember, I was, I was. Yeah, I was in college. I remember Pac man as a wrestler.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You've done it all.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Are you still doing music?
Giannis Pappas
I'm doing music. I actually. Look, let me. I'm gonna give y'all a sneak peek.
Chrissy Chaos
Hell yeah, dude.
Pac Man Jones
Hear it.
Chrissy Chaos
Let's do it.
Giannis Pappas
I really don't do this all the time. Time.
Chrissy Chaos
Well, we feel honored song right here.
Giannis Pappas
It's a little different cuz everybody so used to me just rapping. I got this song. Well, I'm rapping, but it's like a country music song.
Chrissy Chaos
Oh yes.
Giannis Pappas
And I got, I got Jimmy Allen on here.
Chrissy Chaos
Hell yeah, dude. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Hell yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Oh, that's you.
Giannis Pappas
This Jimmy right here. Don't leave me baby me.
Pac Man Jones
I think this will get everyone jumping tailgate. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Oh yeah.
Pac Man Jones
That's country. Yeah. But also mix.
Giannis Pappas
Drop it down on mono gate.
Pac Man Jones
That's. This is going to bump in the South.
Giannis Pappas
Oh, this is going to be good.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, it's going to bump in the south.
Giannis Pappas
It's going to be good. Yeah, I see this song, like, really?
Pac Man Jones
I think white boys are going to like that song too.
Giannis Pappas
Pull up at the tailgate.
Pac Man Jones
Hell yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, I like it, dude.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You just something different, though, you know what I mean?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
I mean, and then I got. I got hood records too, but, like, I like to mix stuff up.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
So when did you want to be when you were a little kid? Was it a musician or a football player?
Giannis Pappas
I wrote a poem like seven, eight years old. Like, jones my name. Basketball my game. Basketball, football, my game. One day I'm gonna make it to the hall of Fame. I've never thought about doing anything else but being a pro athlete. Yeah, I indulged in the music just because of my environment and having a studio. Me and my group, we bought Dallas Austin Studio, that was in Atlanta. So, like, Young Thug 21, Savage Metro, boom. And all them came through the studio that we was. That we owned at the time.
Chrissy Chaos
Do you ever playing in the NFL? Cause it's like such a dream, right? But were there ever days where it just felt like a day job to you where you're like, I don't want to fucking play the Jets. No, you always, every day you're like, this is amazing. I can't believe I get to do this. Yeah, that's awesome.
Giannis Pappas
Especially when you get the game taken away from you. Like from me being suspended with the commissioner, me breaking my neck, being paralyzed twice. Hadn't sitting out, sit out a year and get all my back. So you respect the game a lot more once you go through, I guess, different things, I guess, and then you realize that the game is a privilege. Like, this is not forever. And you got to enjoy. Watch the.
Chrissy Chaos
Can you imagine breaking your neck twice? Dude, he broke his neck twice.
Pac Man Jones
I know. I couldn't imagine playing that sport in winter.
Chrissy Chaos
Oh, in the winter.
Pac Man Jones
Like, what is that?
Giannis Pappas
Shitty Pittsburgh and December when it's 10 below with the wind chill.
Chrissy Chaos
Damn, it legit hurts.
Pac Man Jones
I mean, it's like a car accident when you get hit. Right?
Chrissy Chaos
But I feel like these.
Giannis Pappas
It does hurt. But we don't know nothing else, though. Yeah, you.
Pac Man Jones
So mentally, you guys are like the samurai of athletes.
Chrissy Chaos
Yes. You really are the elite class.
Pac Man Jones
The class. I mean, there's no tougher sport. I think football players are the toughest.
Chrissy Chaos
Football and hockey.
Giannis Pappas
All right. Hockey guys are really tough.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, right.
Giannis Pappas
Hey, don't forget the lacrosse guys, too, though.
Chrissy Chaos
Oh, yes.
Giannis Pappas
Lacrosse is a fucking.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, that shit is real.
Giannis Pappas
They're really diving on lacrosse. Yeah, that shit is Real.
Pac Man Jones
How do you feel about the new football rules now, where you protect the quarterback, everything.
Giannis Pappas
It's always been like that, really. It's just now that they put more emphasis on it.
Pac Man Jones
Right.
Giannis Pappas
Can't hit them low. Can't. Can't hit them high. You barely hit them right now.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, you can't. They just. Everyone else can get hit but the quarterback.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
And it's like, why the mv. The MVP always goes to the quarterback.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Pac Man Jones
You're the quarterback. It's like they should have. They kind of do have. Where they have player of the year or something. So it's like, I don't just say quarterback award.
Chrissy Chaos
Right. Let the quarterback have their own award.
Pac Man Jones
Have their own award because it's mvp.
Giannis Pappas
This year to me was Saquon.
Chrissy Chaos
Saquon. Yeah. Of course.
Giannis Pappas
He should have definitely won.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, we were. We're big New York Giants fans, so that was tough. No. But I voted for. But I was rooting for Saquon. I. I say it wasn't Saquon's problem. No fault that he, like, he didn't want to leave the Giants. I love Giants. Let him go.
Pac Man Jones
It was just tough to watch as a Giant fan.
Chrissy Chaos
Yes.
Pac Man Jones
Like, damn, the Giant organization sucks. I mean, look what they did.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
And I mean, Daniel Jones. What was that all about?
Chrissy Chaos
Daniel Jones.
Pac Man Jones
Never the guy. No, he was just never the guy.
Giannis Pappas
They paid him again.
Pac Man Jones
They paid him.
Chrissy Chaos
Wow. Yes.
Giannis Pappas
$100 million.
Pac Man Jones
$100 million.
Chrissy Chaos
I mean. Yeah. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Do you still have all your football money?
Giannis Pappas
Hell, no. No, no, no, no. Don't have all of it. I wish I did.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, you just had fun.
Chrissy Chaos
What you spend it on?
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, I didn't spend all of it.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
I spend a good opinion of it. But, like, I'm in a great place as far as financially, mentally good. I got some good people that's around me in my circle. Jerry Jones is one of them. But, like, I ain't do too bad.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Everything I got is paid for.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Good. No, no. Major debt. All right, Good.
Pac Man Jones
And you know what? He's adopted his friend's kids. I mean, that's. You're a great dude.
Chrissy Chaos
Oh, yes. Amazing, too. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
The right thing to do that a lot of guys just wouldn't do. So. Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
It's almost like, you know, when I did that, it wasn't like I was adopting them. I was just trying to get them to skip the line pass. Like, I did adopt them. Of course, I spent. Spent a lot of money with them coming stand with me for three and a half years. But when I was thinking of, I'm like, how do we get these kids notoriety? Like, because nobody was talking about them. They was. They was decent athletes, I would say, right.
Pac Man Jones
Is one of them going to Ohio State or something? Or.
Giannis Pappas
He's committed to Ohio State.
Pac Man Jones
He's committed to Ohio State.
Chrissy Chaos
We don't know where he's going to go.
Giannis Pappas
I don't know.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, can hear that on the Pac Man Jones shows on BET online.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
What is it? Yeah, BET Online.
Giannis Pappas
BET Online.
Chrissy Chaos
Hell yeah, dude.
Giannis Pappas
Pac Man Jones show politely.
Chrissy Chaos
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Pac Man Jones
Bro. Yeah. What do you think about ye right now? What do you think's going on with yi?
Chrissy Chaos
Who? Kanye. Mentally ill, right?
Giannis Pappas
No, it's just certain that I don't. I don't stand on. And like, I got a lot of Jew friends. Like, I always call myself a black Jew.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Giannis Pappas
Certain things like, like, right. I only. I only speak on certain. Like, it ain't a. No space for me to speak on.
Chrissy Chaos
I got.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, yeah, I get you.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, I like that. I like that. That. I love his music, though. His music is good.
Pac Man Jones
Tough. Yeah, I do like his music.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. Black Jew friends is. Is a funny.
Pac Man Jones
Can't wait for. Yeah, I can't wait for a new single which is probably going to be called like, how h. You know.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, something crazy Hitler. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I mean, dude, what about. What about. Do you. Do you see any hope for. I mean, New York football? Like the Jets. I mean, we may like the Giants. I'm okay.
Giannis Pappas
Believable receiver right now.
Chrissy Chaos
Right? We just need a qb.
Pac Man Jones
He's great. He had a bad concussion, though. Remember that one concussion.
Giannis Pappas
Tell me what team is good without a good quarterback?
Chrissy Chaos
Nobody.
Pac Man Jones
Zero.
Chrissy Chaos
Is he a real.
Pac Man Jones
It's really a quarterback.
Giannis Pappas
There's some teams that's good with A good quarterback without no help but like it's hard. It be good without a good quarterback.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, right.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. I mean they got the, the quarterback I guess in is there. I don't think there's anybody who's more important to.
Giannis Pappas
Oh, the Giants driving the quarterback this year.
Chrissy Chaos
I hope so. I mean I, they, I, I want.
Giannis Pappas
Y'All never drafted a black quarterback ever.
Chrissy Chaos
In here we got, I want them to take Cam Ward from the Hurricanes.
Giannis Pappas
Hurry up. Y'all gotta get up there, don't you.
Chrissy Chaos
I know. Yeah. Because he's. Their Giants are three right now. But there she's going to go one or two. And they will. Well, maybe they'll take Sanders son. Possibly. Right?
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
I mean they could.
Pac Man Jones
Hopefully that's what they need to do. The Giants organization, they've been, we've been bad for a long time.
Chrissy Chaos
For a very long time.
Pac Man Jones
Very brutal for a long.
Chrissy Chaos
Here's the thing you could say like people would make fun of Eli Manning and say like he's cross eyed and like look at him. That guy won fucking two Super Bowls and every time he got hit he got right up.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
So Eli Manning, I personally think he's hall of Famer.
Giannis Pappas
His brain is so big when it comes to football.
Chrissy Chaos
Yes.
Giannis Pappas
Being in that family, like I'll take Eli Manning with no arm just for him to get us in and out of plays. Seriously, you know what I mean? Like I don't think they get enough praises like they should. Like the Manning family is unbelievable. Like, especially when it comes to like X's and O's and football and when.
Chrissy Chaos
They talk, when they start. I've watched the Manning brothers telecast and stuff. When they do their show, when they talk plays, it's actually like speaking a different language. I don't know. I love sports. I have no idea what they're even talking about because it's just like they say it so quick.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
It's wild.
Pac Man Jones
Is there a more underappreciated position though than the cornerback?
Chrissy Chaos
I mean Pacman, I'm saying the cornerback.
Giannis Pappas
Is the hardest job.
Pac Man Jones
It's the hardest job besides the quarterback.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
I, I do think quarterback is the hardest job.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Just because you making all the blitzes, you calling, you checking the and all that, me going guarding this on the island by myself, it's really hard. But, but I think the quarterback position is a little bit more in depth of IQ and different things when it come to football.
Chrissy Chaos
Who's the best quarterback you ever played with?
Giannis Pappas
Do you think that I play with.
Chrissy Chaos
Do we Have a spit count. By the way, I am counting nine spits. Let's get a spit counter up.
Giannis Pappas
You said that I play with that.
Chrissy Chaos
You played with?
Giannis Pappas
Yes, the best one, Steve McNair.
Chrissy Chaos
Wow. Yeah, Rip Man. Steve McNair was the best.
Giannis Pappas
The rest of them was interesting.
Chrissy Chaos
He. He. Did you play with him on tight? Yeah. Is that when you guys went far? Did you go to Super Bowl?
Giannis Pappas
No, we didn't.
Chrissy Chaos
But you went deep in the playoffs that year, right?
Giannis Pappas
We had a good year, but yeah.
Pac Man Jones
He got an MVP, right? Steve McNair?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, I think so.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah. And he got a offensive MVP too.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. Yeah, he was great.
Chrissy Chaos
He was.
Pac Man Jones
And what he. It was the girl he was dating.
Chrissy Chaos
The girl was dating. Believe. Yeah. You think it was something else? You think it was something more like a conspiracy?
Giannis Pappas
I was with Steve the week before he passed away and the girl was with him also. Actually we were doing Joes vs Pros in LA. And me personally, I just don't believe that she would do it. Why would you kill somebody that's taking care of you?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, it doesn't make sense.
Giannis Pappas
There's some foul play in there.
Chrissy Chaos
Her name was Sahel Kazemi. She then killed herself.
Giannis Pappas
That's what they say.
Chrissy Chaos
That's what they say, the murder. Suicide. So what do you think? If you had to speculate, what do you think possibly happened?
Giannis Pappas
I don't think she killed herself. I don't think she killed him either.
Chrissy Chaos
You think somebody came in and killed the both of them? It's the only thing that's possible, right?
Pac Man Jones
Who do you think, what do you think it could have been? Was he in any trouble or anything?
Giannis Pappas
No, no, I think this was all like inner circle.
Chrissy Chaos
Inner circle shit.
Pac Man Jones
Damn.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, that's interesting.
Pac Man Jones
Her name was Sahil Kazemi.
Chrissy Chaos
So it was Middle Eastern? I guess so.
Pac Man Jones
They were saying it was his ex boyfriend. Her ex boyfriend.
Chrissy Chaos
Oh, her ex boyfriend killed the both of them?
Pac Man Jones
That's what it says here, yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Oh, interesting. That's very interesting.
Pac Man Jones
Very sad.
Chrissy Chaos
That sucks.
Giannis Pappas
I don't think that's what happened either.
Pac Man Jones
No?
Chrissy Chaos
No. So you just. You have no idea what happened, but you just don't?
Giannis Pappas
I got an idea what happened. If, if, if only thing I'm saying if. Let's just say Steve best friend get there and called someone before he called the police. That seemed kind of skeptical to me.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, I don't love that. I don't love that. I don't love you. Yeah, you gotta call the cops right away, man. That does suck. And see, cause they don't talk about that really, in that documentary. They just say it's all. There's a lot of things throughout history. It's not what it seems, right?
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
I mean, we talk about it all the time on this podcast. These conspiracies. You're like, the government can make anything look like anything they want anytime. Yeah, it's wild.
Pac Man Jones
Dude, do you know anything about samurais?
Giannis Pappas
No. There's only one black one that's.
Chrissy Chaos
You know about him?
Pac Man Jones
Just talked about them.
Chrissy Chaos
What do you know about the black samurai doing?
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, what you mean what I know?
Chrissy Chaos
Well, like what I'm saying, like, what do you like? What do you know anything about him?
Giannis Pappas
I did a little research.
Chrissy Chaos
What do you like? What'd you like about him in your research?
Giannis Pappas
He was on the black guy. Everybody else was Japanese.
Chrissy Chaos
We were saying. We were saying this is the only black samurai besides the Wu Tang Clan. Just him. His name was Yusuke Yasuke. And he was a very. Yasuke, dude. And they said he was 6:2, which at that time was, you know, the. The tallest person they've ever seen in Japan. Because 6:2 today, that's like being 6:9 or something like that. You know, people got bigger. But the dude, Yasuke. See, some people say we were talking about this earlier. Some people say he wasn't a samurai, but they're fucking haters. I want to say he was a samurai. Japanese historians are not claiming him. See, that's the thing we talk about, dude, in the media. It's always white people are the most racist. And I'm saying we've had our moments. But Asian people are pretty fucking racist. They hate each other, number one. And then they really don't like anybody who's not Asian. They are. They will not claim Yatsuke. I will claim him as a white guy, but the Japanese won't.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, people just. People are horrible. No matter what. No matter where you go, that's what. Everywhere you go, people are just horrible.
Chrissy Chaos
Even we were talking about this before. Even the Portuguese. How come people don't talk more? Why is it always white people wear the biggest pieces of shit?
Pac Man Jones
Because Portuguese are white.
Chrissy Chaos
But the Portuguese. They are, but they're not really white. Like, why, you know. Hold on.
Giannis Pappas
What do you mean they're not really white?
Chrissy Chaos
Because while they're fucking speak Spanish or Portuguese.
Pac Man Jones
They speak Portuguese.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, that's.
Chrissy Chaos
But it's not.
Pac Man Jones
But Spanish. You're white too.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, but they're not. I feel like me as a white, I'm white. Even you. He's Greek, right? Like, I'm look like the whitest guy in here and I get all the hate when meanwhile I'd be the least racist and my family has nothing to do with fucking anything.
Giannis Pappas
Well, I don't know. Greeks might be the least racist races.
Pac Man Jones
Oh, that's not true.
Chrissy Chaos
No.
Pac Man Jones
Greeks are not very racist. Everybody, though.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. And everybody who aren't Greek.
Chrissy Chaos
Yes. Not me.
Giannis Pappas
You sure?
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, I'm positive.
Giannis Pappas
I got a lot of good friends. That's pretty good to me then.
Pac Man Jones
That's good. Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
A lot of white friends. That's good. Pretty good.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Exactly.
Pac Man Jones
Who do you think the most evil people are, group?
Giannis Pappas
Blacks.
Pac Man Jones
Blacks.
Chrissy Chaos
See, we agree. No, no. Black. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Do you think just all people are bad? It depends on the person.
Chrissy Chaos
It depends.
Giannis Pappas
Ye don't matter what color it is, you know?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, bro, that's what I'm telling.
Giannis Pappas
That person is a bad person.
Pac Man Jones
So what? What is up with human nature? What's going on? Why are we. Why can't we just chill? We have it so good. We got iPhones. We got food. How come we can't just get along and just exchange cultures and just be happy?
Giannis Pappas
I don't know. You tell me.
Pac Man Jones
It's a. It's a tough thing to figure out.
Chrissy Chaos
I think we're getting closer to it. I think. I think we're getting closer to it in history.
Pac Man Jones
I don't know what it is.
Chrissy Chaos
I think. I think. I think we're getting closer to this kind of, like, we're all kind of in this shit together. Not. Not in our lifetime, but we're closer today than we were 300 years ago.
Giannis Pappas
I agree with that.
Chrissy Chaos
You know, I think we.
Pac Man Jones
An alien like another.
Giannis Pappas
Like AI, bro.
Pac Man Jones
AI.
Chrissy Chaos
Maybe we got to fight against.
Pac Man Jones
Or maybe AI will be so smart that it'll tell us, like, what are you guys doing?
Chrissy Chaos
No, what? I think the only way, personally, that I think is two things need to happen. We. We as a human race, because we're so divided right now, need to come together and fight something else. So it's either aliens or AI. So if we come together, because then we'll.
Giannis Pappas
You better not fuck with AI because AI is undefeated right now.
Chrissy Chaos
They. Right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They are undefeated. We think like we think, think we think there's people right now who are so advanced at their AI, like LeBron James. We've said this on the show before, that there's no way LeBron is human being. He has to be AI made by the Chinese because he does love them.
Giannis Pappas
I might agree with that. Because to do what he's doing at 40 years old for 22 years.
Chrissy Chaos
Crazy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, dude, I'm out for two weeks after a colonoscopy, and this. Not even two weeks.
Giannis Pappas
Like, three weeks.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. I mean, yeah, he's. I don't do. I wonder if he. Now, here's a question. If LeBron was in the NFL, which many people said he could have made it, and we all here agreed, you think he'd still be playing in the NFL? You can't play that long like that.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, he ain't. He won a quarterback. Only quarterbacks can play that long.
Chrissy Chaos
Only quarterbacks. Right, right.
Pac Man Jones
So how good friends are you with Goodell now?
Giannis Pappas
I love Goodell.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, that's good.
Giannis Pappas
I have no problem with Goodell.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
I mean, like, he suspended me, but, like, it helped me in the long run.
Pac Man Jones
That's good. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Well, that's the thing is, like, you know, one thing I think about, like, the media and just, like, people's brains in general is like, somebody who's never met a Roger Goodell, who's never met, you know, any of these people, they just hate them for no reason. Where it's like, you've never even met the man. Like, even Trump, it's like you don't know anything about him. You know what the media feeds you, you know, little clips of a human being.
Giannis Pappas
That's crazy. I was just telling somebody this today. Like how you watch the news. Like, I'm a Big Dave guy. I watch ABC a lot. And you can tell, like, how the conversations are controlled to make people flip to one side.
Chrissy Chaos
Sure.
Giannis Pappas
Instead of telling the whole story.
Pac Man Jones
Right.
Giannis Pappas
Sure. Like, for instance, Biden. I ain't saying this no type of way. He said he wasn't gonna pardon his son. God damn it. What'd he do?
Pac Man Jones
Pardoned his son.
Chrissy Chaos
Pardoned his son.
Giannis Pappas
Like all this shit is.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
So tick for tack. Yeah. I want to say.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
And it ain't no difference. I mean, it's just a slight difference as far as which one you like. You know what I mean? If you got some money, you gonna like the other side. If you ain't got no money, of course you're gonna like that side.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Pac Man Jones
If you got money, you're Republican. If you don't. I was. I always say, everyone's a Democrat till they get rich.
Chrissy Chaos
What?
Pac Man Jones
And then.
Chrissy Chaos
But see, that's. That's what I think, personally. Like, if we were just like. If things were. Instead of like. Like, one race versus that race, one political party versus that political party, if it was just like, hey, rich people help poor people a little bit more and that's how you broke down problems, I don't think anybody would really mind. It's when you. It's when you say, oh, so and so doesn't have advantages because they're black or white or whatever. Now it's like, now stop with the skin color and make it about the money. Right. You know, it's always about the money. That's always about that.
Pac Man Jones
The money isn't. Is that what you found? It's always about the.
Giannis Pappas
Always about the paper.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, that's it.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
That's what we say.
Pac Man Jones
I got a question for you that I've always wondered. Right. Football is a sport where your team is just. There's so many dudes on the team. There's so many guys. Have you ever.
Giannis Pappas
There's only 56 on the NFL roster.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, it's a lot. It's a lot of sports. It's a lot of dudes.
Chrissy Chaos
I mean, yeah.
Giannis Pappas
College, you got about 120 of them.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Really?
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. That's why if you can't make a college football team, you're just not that good.
Pac Man Jones
Could you remember, like, is there a point where you just, like, you on the team, like, you don't even know. Can you remember the names of your teammates?
Giannis Pappas
You're like, oh, dude, I do.
Chrissy Chaos
What's the longest you went into a season, though, where you were like, I actually don't know that guy's name.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. Like you knew everyone's name on special teams.
Giannis Pappas
Hell yeah. They had to block for me.
Pac Man Jones
That's a good point. Oh, yeah.
Giannis Pappas
I would call him out if I'm getting hit, like preseason.
Chrissy Chaos
You don't.
Giannis Pappas
You don't really get to know everybody, cuz be in and out of there.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, but.
Giannis Pappas
But like, as far as defensive wise, you know everybody.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Pac Man Jones
I. I think about field goal kickers. They're converted soccer players. Would football be better without these little white boys who kick?
Giannis Pappas
I mean, I'm all for special teams.
Pac Man Jones
No, but here's the thing. I hate when a game comes down to, like, just a field goal. Yeah. And they miss. Did you have, like, did they get beat up behind. Did you like, did you at least give him a wedgie and hang them on a hook? Are looking. I mean, what. I mean, the guy just lost the game for you.
Chrissy Chaos
No, because it's part of the game. I think it's. I think it's. I think it's a Part I think it's crazy.
Pac Man Jones
These guys, blood, sweat and tears, they're out there fighting. And then this guy who's been sitting on the side.
Chrissy Chaos
But it's part of the game, he's a converted. Soccer, he's gotta stay. But these guys gotta stay fucking loose. That's why I think Justin Tucker there should be no problems because the kid got a few happy endings. Hey, who gives a shit? The kid's got to stay loose.
Giannis Pappas
Don't say that now. Cause we ain't say that when we was talking about the other guy that.
Chrissy Chaos
Had Dashaun Watson Johnson.
Giannis Pappas
They like happy ending.
Chrissy Chaos
I. I was saying y'all are giving.
Giannis Pappas
Him a pass though.
Chrissy Chaos
No, I wasn't.
Giannis Pappas
I. I was all about Deshawn Tucker a pass.
Chrissy Chaos
No, and I think I would gave Da a pass too. I think you get a little happy endings. What? How is a marriage and crap and craft likes. And craft like happy endings too. Who doesn't?
Giannis Pappas
That's what they said.
Chrissy Chaos
Who doesn't. Dude, I mean honestly, what other way can you get through this life without a little Asian hands on your.
Giannis Pappas
It's a different tax bracket.
Chrissy Chaos
I mean the kid. Do you think he's gonna get thrown outta the NFL now for this?
Giannis Pappas
Tucker?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
What did he do? He just got a hand job.
Chrissy Chaos
That's what they say, but I don't. I don't. I actually don't know the facts. I really don't. So I shouldn't.
Pac Man Jones
You know, I just don't think. I think it's part of the massage, right?
Giannis Pappas
It's not.
Pac Man Jones
It's not? No.
Chrissy Chaos
Well, you then. You haven't been to West Garden here in New York City?
Giannis Pappas
I did go to the Asian spar here though. It's pretty nice.
Chrissy Chaos
It's pretty nice. Yeah. That's what it is.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
They take care of you Bamboo.
Chrissy Chaos
What's they say? What did Justin Tucker's. Why? I mean this guy is kind of now.
Pac Man Jones
Yes, it's horrible. He didn't do anything wrong.
Chrissy Chaos
Well, no, I think he did though. I think he did do. No. Well, I don't know what it is. Let's. Before we start being assholes, let's see Justin Tuck to describe the Justin Tucker said the allegations.
Giannis Pappas
No. Justin Sugar continues to maintain his innocence as the spotlight remains on his allegation. Sexual misconduct.
Chrissy Chaos
Yes.
Pac Man Jones
So what does that mean?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, I mean, I mean the problem.
Pac Man Jones
Is that kid Hardy just on the Cowboys. Didn't he beat his wife to like.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, but he got thrown out of the NFL for that.
Pac Man Jones
Did he? Of Course I remember. He got. He was playing after that.
Chrissy Chaos
You can't do that. So. Tucker was accused of sexual misconduct by 16 female massage therapists.
Giannis Pappas
Bro, you just made me miss my whole drink with. Literally, I missed my whole mouth from.
Chrissy Chaos
Eight different spas and wellness centers in Baltimore. That's a lot. I gotta be honest with you.
Pac Man Jones
Do you believe this, though?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, but one or two is something. But 16, I mean, the kids got a.
Giannis Pappas
You don't believe it?
Pac Man Jones
No.
Chrissy Chaos
The kids got an issue.
Pac Man Jones
What does that mean? I want to know. Because 16 different people, sexual misconduct. What does that.
Giannis Pappas
What does that mean there probably.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Giannis Pappas
Without consent of the. The massage.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay, right now, what is it?
Pac Man Jones
This guy.
Chrissy Chaos
That's Justin Tucker. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Who is this guy?
Chrissy Chaos
He's the best field goal kicker, arguably, of all time. He was one of them.
Giannis Pappas
He had a horrible year.
Chrissy Chaos
He did have a horrible year this year.
Giannis Pappas
You know why he had a horrible year? Tell me that shit right there. He knew all this shit was coming out.
Chrissy Chaos
He did, right? For real, right? He knew it.
Giannis Pappas
And they hit it, right?
Chrissy Chaos
So he. That's why they hid it, right?
Giannis Pappas
You know why they hid it? Cuz they needed his ass.
Chrissy Chaos
Right? And then once he had a horrible year, they said, fuck it, release it. Interesting.
Giannis Pappas
Same way it sound like the Texans did, old boy, huh?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. Yeah. Seriously.
Pac Man Jones
Are you talking about.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, the owner brung all this craft.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Yep. Yeah. So I wonder if. Yeah. This is a good way to get out of a contract. Just say, you know what? Let's release the story about him getting happy endings.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. Because I mean, like, 16.
Giannis Pappas
I mean, let's do it at the playoffs, too. Let's not try to. He already going through the shit. He already know what's going on. He's in a fucking slump right here the last six weeks of the season. Can we just give the guy a little slack so we can try to win the Super Bowl?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, well, that's the thing too, is like, you know. You know, I. I did a show with Tiki Barber, right? Tiki Barber. Tiki's the man. And Tiki told me. He goes, you know, we're. As much as, you know, we. We're living our dream and all that. We're just reg. We're men at the end of the day, goes. So if you go, he goes. You know, sometimes a player would have a bad game. Like, Tiki was like, the times I have a bad game, it's like, maybe I got to fight my wife. Maybe my kid isn't doing good in school. Like, anything Else that would fuck us up on stage is kids. Obedience. Could me up on the field. This is the same shit. So when nobody could figure out why this, why his mother missing all these.
Giannis Pappas
Kicks and he never miss because he.
Chrissy Chaos
Knew that they were, they were going to come at him with the happy endings. So what? So I guess he'll get thrown off. But what did his wife say? Is his wife okay with this? I mean, at the end of the day, why, why can't wives, why does happy endings have to be cheating? Why can't the wives just allow that? If it's part of the body and there's no kissing on the mouth. I don't even know her fucking name.
Giannis Pappas
Right.
Chrissy Chaos
It's just a hand. I got my eyes closed.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
What the heck? Hell. How else am I supposed to get through this?
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
I can't do anything.
Pac Man Jones
I don't know, it just seems fishy that two players, 16, I mean, well, look at Sean Watson had what, 16? Or he had a lot too.
Chrissy Chaos
Look at this thing. The false allegation. The wife said the false allegations against, against Justin have caused so much hurt to our family. I believe my husband and I love and support him fully. So that means she just allowed him to get happy ending.
Pac Man Jones
Look, it's a stress.
Giannis Pappas
I love it. I love it.
Pac Man Jones
This guy's got a stressful job. He's sitting on the side. He's a converted soccer player, whatever. These guys are out there playing the whole game. And then he comes onto the field. You know how much stress it is. All these guys in the team look at him like, you better make this beat your ass. The guy needs a happy end up to blow up some fucking.
Chrissy Chaos
Now look, now look, here's the thing. If he was though, and again, I don't understand, if he was actually grabbing them and putting the hand on a dick without them, they think they're, you know, just doing a massage. That's a different story. And that's maybe what happened. Right? But I got to be honest, you go to some of these places and they just start doing it. Yeah, I've heard.
Giannis Pappas
You heard?
Chrissy Chaos
I've heard. My friend told me.
Giannis Pappas
Sources.
Chrissy Chaos
My friend told me. And so my friend told me that that's what they do. And if that's doing that, then how can I stop it? But I have to think, if it's 16 women, he was probably on his bag of grabs. And you can't do that.
Giannis Pappas
Sixteen is a lot.
Chrissy Chaos
That's a lot. You can't come back from 16.
Pac Man Jones
All I know is this Is a very stressful job. It is very stressful job.
Giannis Pappas
I will say this.
Pac Man Jones
Every game is like a playoff game.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
You're out there in negative degree weather in Wisconsin. Every time you get hit it feels like a car crashes. All this pressures. No guaranteed money in the NFL.
Chrissy Chaos
Let me ask you this, sports.
Pac Man Jones
Is there a guy. I would need a Handy at least 100%. Yeah. I would need a handy 100% to be able.
Giannis Pappas
That's at least make sure she sign up for it.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. At least.
Chrissy Chaos
Now let me ask you this. If was there, if was there a team that. If you were like, I do not want to play for that team because I never. You don't want to live in that city.
Giannis Pappas
I hate everything about it.
Chrissy Chaos
What is it? What is it?
Giannis Pappas
Everything, bro. Just stanky ass city. The river's ugly.
Chrissy Chaos
I agree.
Giannis Pappas
The colors stink. Potholes everywhere. When you drive through the fucking city. It's nothing like even if they were.
Chrissy Chaos
A playoff team, you're like, I don't want to play.
Giannis Pappas
I would never.
Pac Man Jones
Wow. Pittsburgh.
Chrissy Chaos
Because you're from Cincinnati. So that's a rival.
Giannis Pappas
No. Well, I'm from. From Atlanta, but I went to West Virginia too.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Don't forget about the rival between the backyard brawl between Pitt and West Virginia.
Pac Man Jones
Wow.
Chrissy Chaos
So Pittsburgh is the city.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
So you'd rather you would play anywhere else? Anywhere besides any interesting. You play in fucking Jacksonville.
Giannis Pappas
The players coming about coming out now and saying how shitty Pittsburgh is. See, the running back went to the Chargers. He told him like the fucking city is stink. The fucking facility is horrible.
Chrissy Chaos
Pittsburgh.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
What I thought they were like, don't.
Giannis Pappas
Say nothing good about Pittsburgh on the show.
Chrissy Chaos
Huh?
Giannis Pappas
Don't talk good about Pittsburgh.
Chrissy Chaos
No, no, no, no, I'm not. I will be there in November. Go to christycomedy.com for tickies. But yeah, I will agree with Pac man here. Them. But when he. Yeah, but I will say. But I thought that they were like a premier franchise like the Giants and the Steelers, like these legacy franchises that treated everybody good. I guess I'm wrong. All right.
Pac Man Jones
Pac man does not like Pittsburgh.
Chrissy Chaos
He does not like Pittsburgh. Hey, you know what? I support that.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Whatever people want to do.
Pac Man Jones
I feel that way about Jacksonville as a city.
Chrissy Chaos
You don't like Jacksonville? Yes, yes. I don't like Indianapolis as a city.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, Indy do suck too.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. Indy kind of sucks. Let's be honest, dude.
Giannis Pappas
Worse than Pittsburgh though.
Chrissy Chaos
It ain't worse than Pittsburgh, but let's be honest. Honest. Okay. You got the big ones. You got New York, Atlanta, L.A. chicago, Miami.
Giannis Pappas
Dallas, bro.
Chrissy Chaos
And Dallas.
Giannis Pappas
Dallas should be.
Chrissy Chaos
What else?
Pac Man Jones
I mean, what are like Dallas, huh?
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
You would play for the Cowboys all day?
Giannis Pappas
Yeah. Everything's different in Jerry world.
Pac Man Jones
Oh, you like that?
Chrissy Chaos
I can imagine.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
I love all the perks that come with it, too.
Pac Man Jones
He. Is he the guy who gives the most perks?
Giannis Pappas
Probably. It's the city that give you the most perks.
Pac Man Jones
Okay.
Giannis Pappas
Like, everybody got a deal. Everybody. Like, if you on practice squad with the Cowboys, you're good to go. I hate to say, like, but this is just lined up outside of the.
Chrissy Chaos
Let's just say. Let's just say if Justin Tucker was playing for the Cowboys, he'd have a different life right now.
Giannis Pappas
Yes, he would.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. Yeah. Those.
Pac Man Jones
Jerry protects the guys a little more. He more understanding.
Chrissy Chaos
I respect that.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
I would say that. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
And, like, just being on the Cowboys different than any organization that I've been. And I've had a lot of people that play in the NFL, but, like, yeah, Cowboys different.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Boys different. Denver treats you good too, though. Denver was a good spot, too.
Pac Man Jones
How do you navigate all the. When you're a professional athlete and you're a star, how do you navigate. Women are just throwing yourself. You go, you know, you go play in Miami, you go to Prime. I'm sure there's women at the bar. Just is.
Chrissy Chaos
It's not easy.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. You gotta stay away from that. How do you know? How do you. How do you deal with that? How do young guys deal with it?
Giannis Pappas
This is like McDonald's, bro.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Go through the line, you figure out if you want to buy something or not.
Chrissy Chaos
Right? Simple as that, bro.
Giannis Pappas
Simple as that.
Pac Man Jones
Right.
Chrissy Chaos
What I love about Pac Man Jones, he doesn't have blood pressure issues, dude. He's not. He's like, I got ways to figure this shit out.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
You know what I'm saying?
Chrissy Chaos
Which I respect. I like.
Giannis Pappas
It's the answer to everything there is.
Pac Man Jones
Right.
Giannis Pappas
You know what I mean? Just how you explain. Answer to whoever you got to answer to.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
What have you learned? Have you gained a lot of wisdom because you're a guy, you know, the media always talks about you. And what have you. What have you learned about life? What is life about?
Giannis Pappas
Life is about being happy, bro.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
And I learned, like, it don't matter how much money you got to be mentally okay. You get what I'm saying?
Chrissy Chaos
Right?
Pac Man Jones
That's priceless. Right?
Giannis Pappas
It's priceless.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Everybody, like, the money's gonna be there.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Money's not hard to get.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Being sane and making sure you fucking mentally there every day and you enjoy yourself. Just you enjoying yourself is way more than the money part. So like, I would say the, the, the biggest thing I've learned doing these fucking, what, 20 years? The last, last 20 years. I would say it's just being okay with myself, like figuring out different things for me. You know what I mean? I've been in a unbelievable situation. Like football changed my life, put me in rooms where I never would have thought I would been in. You know what I mean? I pretty much done everything. Like I'm golf with the president. So I done did a lot of which president right now?
Pac Man Jones
Oh, Trump.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, yeah.
Pac Man Jones
What do you think about Trump?
Giannis Pappas
I love him. I already told you that. Like I, I, I, I took that pig skin and adapted it into my way, which was not right every time.
Chrissy Chaos
Sure, but you did it your way.
Giannis Pappas
But I did it my way.
Chrissy Chaos
Well, what I like about you, Pac man, truly is I, I'm feeling your peace and wisdom. And it really is truly, I like believe it wholeheartedly. And what I also like about you is the dichotomy of you. You, because you are a peaceful, wise man. But make no mistake, I'm on time. You make, make absolutely no mistake. You pop off with Pacman in the airport, you get punched in the face. I love that. I really ride with that aspect of you where it's like, bro. Much like the samurai, bro.
Giannis Pappas
That was Shaq, bro. I was protecting Shaq.
Chrissy Chaos
Wait, what?
Giannis Pappas
I didn't know Shaq was with me.
Pac Man Jones
On that trip protecting Shaq. Who's, who needs to protect Shaq, bro.
Chrissy Chaos
Pac Man.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, like, Shaq was on the show with me and Pat on Pat show and he explained everything, but.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay, well, we'll watch that.
Pac Man Jones
Okay.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, I didn't know. But, but the thing is like, it's much like samurai stuff. That's why I brought it up because we, you know, we talk a little bit about samurai here. They were peaceful and, and, and stayed, you know, true to wisdom. They had all these things, but they will fucking behead you if you cross them. And that's what Pacman will do with a 1, 2. Right?
Pac Man Jones
Well, it is true. You can't really be peaceful unless you're capable of great violence.
Chrissy Chaos
1000 Otherwise, you're just harmless. The only way Pac man is capable of great violence when, when you. Yes, but, but that, but he got that through peace.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Pac man wasn't gonna be able to be as peaceful as he is now. Without knocking a few heads off. And that's just what it is.
Giannis Pappas
And I respect, I think it's the weed now, though. I'll be so high.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, right.
Chrissy Chaos
Well, that's why you got the sunglasses on.
Giannis Pappas
No, this is like mine.
Chrissy Chaos
It's just your look.
Pac Man Jones
So you smoke a lot of weed now?
Giannis Pappas
Smoke a lot of weed.
Pac Man Jones
There it is. And it helps mellow your.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, yeah. But now let me smoke a lot.
Pac Man Jones
Of weed while you were playing in the NFL.
Chrissy Chaos
I've always smoked, always smoked good. Well, that's why you said you're famous for. You said you used, you never used your own piss.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, never.
Pac Man Jones
Whose piss did you, what kind of nerdy friend do you have who had.
Giannis Pappas
I got a couple good friends that, that, Right. That's been around me a long time. Like my best friend Chris Harveth.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Giannis Pappas
Left with me from West Virginia.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Giannis Pappas
He had pretty good piss.
Pac Man Jones
Let me just say this though.
Chrissy Chaos
Shout out his P. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
You're constantly in pain when you play football. I mean, there, it's either going to be painkillers or weed, right?
Giannis Pappas
Oh, they giving you the painkillers?
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. So why, what's worse, weed or pain?
Giannis Pappas
I prefer to, I prefer.
Pac Man Jones
Weed's not as bad as painkillers.
Giannis Pappas
I prefer the, the weed. Because if you take the painkillers, like you have soft tissues injuries. Yeah, I'm talking about hamscreen groins and all that shit. Because the pain pills, it basically dried your muscles.
Chrissy Chaos
Right. That's why, like, why not. I think it was in the, was it who was from the Browns who kept getting suspended for weeks?
Giannis Pappas
Oh, no, that was Josh Gordon. Josh Gordon.
Chrissy Chaos
Josh Gordon. He kept getting, I was like, this is such bullshit. Like just let the guy smoke weed if it calms him down a little. He's an excellent player.
Pac Man Jones
It's not a performing enhancing. If anything, it's a, it's a poor, it's a performance disinhibitor. Right.
Chrissy Chaos
It could be. It depends on how reaction to.
Pac Man Jones
It's going to hurt you.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, dude, I, I, I agree with that. I'm hoping that we get to a point point in this thing where like we just, we, we remember, we remember that athletes are people first and they're going through problems, just like the guys and the fans are going through problems. And if, you know, you want to smoke a little weed to go because you got a big business meeting, same thing. I might not smoke a little weed because I'm in the super bowl right now.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Why do we have to drug test everybody for Everything, it's bullshit to me. Let the guys just play. Yeah, I think that's, that's. I've always been not okay with that. I understand. Steroids. I get it. You don't want little kids doing steroids. I get it. Get that. But the weed, Come on, dude, it's legal.
Giannis Pappas
It's legal?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, it's legal.
Pac Man Jones
Why now it is suspended for it. Yeah, now it is. It was unfortunate that it wasn't for so long because it's so stupid. Alcohol is much worse than weed.
Chrissy Chaos
I mean, dude, Ricky Williams was. The guy was so high. We do his interviews with his helmet on.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
He didn't give a dress.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, you didn't give a fuck. I like a guy like that. That's awesome. Now let me ask you this, Let me ask you this, Pac Man. You. You. The last time you said you got arrested was 20, 24, right?
Giannis Pappas
That's what. I just got arrested.
Chrissy Chaos
Oh, you did. What happened recently? This is a lawyer call in Dallas. Why'd you get what happened in Dallas?
Giannis Pappas
It was some little racist shit said.
Chrissy Chaos
And somebody was racist against you?
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
White guy.
Giannis Pappas
No, Mexican.
Chrissy Chaos
See, that's what I told you. The whites were not the worst of me to fool you.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah. And I went to grab him and I accidentally like tapped the officer ass. Going to grab him. Oh, so you know. Oh, no, he's hitting the officer. I hit this lady. I wouldn't do that. She had nothing to do with it. I was trying to get to his ass, but I'm trying to get to.
Chrissy Chaos
To the Mexican guy. The officer was Mexican. No, the lady was Mexican.
Giannis Pappas
No, the guy, the guy, the guy.
Chrissy Chaos
Get to was Mexican. Right. And you know what? And that dude. And that's why we need the wal.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, it's for it.
Giannis Pappas
I think they already put up the wall before we did it. Didn't they shut the.
Chrissy Chaos
Yes.
Giannis Pappas
Didn't they shed the thing, the borders.
Chrissy Chaos
Yes, yeah, yes, exactly. Yeah, that's what we're saying. Yeah. See, me and Pac man, we. You know what I mean? Yeah, we get it.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
He's a lib cuck. Don't let him fall. He rides and dies with Biden. Yeah, yeah. Trash. Yeah, dude, I. But that's very, very, very interesting stuff, man. I think. Now do you think, Pac man, do you think this country, the United States of America, you think we're heading for glory years? You think we're going up, up, up? A lot of people starting to talk shit about America now saying we're not as good as we used to be.
Giannis Pappas
What do you think We've been in debt how long?
Chrissy Chaos
A long time. Long time.
Giannis Pappas
I'm trusting what Trump do you like Trump? Tax they ass. Yeah, tax them to get us to get our tax back.
Chrissy Chaos
Tariff.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
And we didn't even know what tariffs were. We got to be honest with you. We thought it was in the NFL. Thought it was Korean Reef.
Pac Man Jones
Does sound like. Yeah, yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
We were like yo Tariff Johnson if he's American.
Giannis Pappas
Not, not. That's not, that's not it.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, we're for him. But yeah, I agree too. I'm, I'm with the plan. I also don't know enough about politics and how to especially run a nation to know I just like hey, this guy seems like he knows what he's talking about. Let's just follow the lead. But Yanni feels different.
Pac Man Jones
No, I. We just, we gotta, we're watching the American pie bake right now. Now nobody knows what's going to happen. We're just looking at the oven, how it's going to turn out. You think it's going to be good?
Giannis Pappas
It's got to be good.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, it's going to be good.
Chrissy Chaos
Do you think they'll ever have football in the Olympics?
Giannis Pappas
That's a good question.
Chrissy Chaos
That'd be good, right? We would beat the out of Adam.
Giannis Pappas
Like who will we play against football? Yeah, next Olympics Flag football. We lost in flag football the last one, didn't we?
Chrissy Chaos
In the Olympics. We lost in flag football.
Giannis Pappas
No, they had a flag thing. Cuz I was talking about, I'm like how the are we losing in flag football?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, come on dude, we're the best and no, we have to be the best football player we lose to in flag football.
Pac Man Jones
Who else even play?
Giannis Pappas
They just had a flag football. Not a longer one.
Chrissy Chaos
Were any ex NFL guys in the flag football?
Giannis Pappas
They had a flag football. Damn. When was it? They just had something with flag football. It was a couple different flag football.
Chrissy Chaos
And the Olympics flag football team will make its Olympic debut in LA in 2028. Olympics.
Giannis Pappas
Go back and google us. That is right there. Go down.
Chrissy Chaos
Which one?
Giannis Pappas
Go up, go up, go up. Right there.
Chrissy Chaos
This one.
Giannis Pappas
One down.
Chrissy Chaos
There it is. Flag football is coming to the.
Giannis Pappas
No, but we played. We played somebody. Yeah, not mistaken. We just had a tournament or some shit with flag football. We stunk up the place because.
Chrissy Chaos
That is a good point though. Who would like basketball and other sports? You. There's many nations playing it and they playing nobody else. Canadians.
Giannis Pappas
It would be hard though, don't you think?
Chrissy Chaos
We lost to the Japanese. We lost to the Japanese.
Pac Man Jones
What?
Chrissy Chaos
In flag football. What the what? Japan. How did we.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Well, first of all, who's on the.
Giannis Pappas
US Playing for Japan that can beat us?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, who was it? Can you please pull up the Japanese.
Pac Man Jones
Flag football and wait, who's playing on the American team?
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
I mean, nobody.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, seriously, that's the problem.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, dude. I mean, that is wild that we lost to the Japanese and we got destroyed. What was the score? 41 to 20.
Giannis Pappas
It was bad.
Chrissy Chaos
Jesus Christ. Well, you know what, dude? We'll let Japan have a win because they got their asses kicked in World War II.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, they did.
Chrissy Chaos
So we'll just let them. You know what? They could beat us in flag football, and that's about it. Yeah, well, this is good. Dude, we've been on with Pac Man Jones for close to 45 minutes, and neither one of us got punched in the face. So that's, I think, a win for the history hyenas.
Giannis Pappas
Right?
Pac Man Jones
Here it is.
Chrissy Chaos
Let me ask you this. Before we let you go, do you remember our names?
Pac Man Jones
No way. I mean, dude, let's just ask him. There's no way.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Dude, I don't think I said mine.
Chrissy Chaos
That's it.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, we did.
Chrissy Chaos
At the beginning.
Pac Man Jones
We did.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. There's no way he's going to remember mine.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, he's. He's going to go back like. Yeah, I just did these two white girls podcast.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. And he's got a bad chance because yours is a normal name, Chris. He'll never remember.
Chrissy Chaos
Said it.
Pac Man Jones
Right.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
And mine. He might know mine. He might remember mine now, because Giannis.
Giannis Pappas
I know Kevin.
Pac Man Jones
Neither one.
Chrissy Chaos
Kevin. Neither one is. But that's all right.
Pac Man Jones
I'm Giannis. Like the bath.
Chrissy Chaos
I'm Giannis. And I'm Chris.
Giannis Pappas
Don't believe it.
Pac Man Jones
It's true. No, it's true.
Chrissy Chaos
All right.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. Well, Pac man, they call me Ms. Pac Man.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Pac Man Jones
No, there's a Ms. Pac man, too.
Chrissy Chaos
What do you mean, there's a video. Oh, in the video game. Ms. Pac Man.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. You call your girl Ms. Pac man or. No, no, no, no.
Giannis Pappas
My wife. Yeah. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Oh, you do call him Ms.
Pac Man Jones
Pack.
Giannis Pappas
Got the mixed Pac man chain, too.
Chrissy Chaos
How many kids do you have?
Giannis Pappas
Three.
Chrissy Chaos
That's a nice number.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah. That's thirsty.
Chrissy Chaos
I got. I got three as well. Yes. Two.
Pac Man Jones
I got two.
Chrissy Chaos
We got a lot of boys.
Giannis Pappas
Girls, I mean.
Pac Man Jones
Two girls for me.
Chrissy Chaos
I got two girls and a boy.
Giannis Pappas
Oh, damn. We just like two girls and a boy.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, baby.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. So that's nice.
Giannis Pappas
Is the boy the youngest?
Chrissy Chaos
The boys the oldest.
Giannis Pappas
Oh, my boys. The youngest.
Chrissy Chaos
Nice. And then your daughter's.
Giannis Pappas
My daughter is at Mississippi State right now. Shout out to Zenia.
Chrissy Chaos
Shout out Zaniyah.
Giannis Pappas
She just actually ran the SEC indoor championship the other day.
Pac Man Jones
Oh, no.
Giannis Pappas
And then I have my middle daughter, which is true. And she's 14. And then Joni, 7.
Chrissy Chaos
You think Joni, you want him to go to the NFL? Would you put him towards it or.
Giannis Pappas
No, he's definitely going to be tough. If I had to bet right now, he'd be top five pick either in NFL or soccer.
Chrissy Chaos
Really?
Pac Man Jones
He's good at soccer.
Chrissy Chaos
He's good at soccer.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Third fastest kid in the country right now.
Chrissy Chaos
Wow. At seven. Seven.
Giannis Pappas
At seven. That's when they run the 13th flag. Seven years old, bro.
Chrissy Chaos
Now, do you. You don't mind if he plays in the NFL? If you want the CTE stuff. You don't care.
Giannis Pappas
You want to play getting cte goddamn walking around.
Chrissy Chaos
For real?
Giannis Pappas
Like, for real, for real.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
And we need to stop wearing these caps of our helmets. And I'm so sick of this. I actually had a conversation with the dude that originally, like.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
And it's no data saying that this shit help you, like, from getting concussions. He did this shit for seven on seven.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Giannis Pappas
It was never really supposed to be for guys to wear this shit in the NFL.
Chrissy Chaos
Right, Right.
Giannis Pappas
I think they should ban it.
Chrissy Chaos
You think they should ban it?
Giannis Pappas
Well, it looks stupid. It don't help.
Chrissy Chaos
So then where do you think the concussions come from? Is it just not being shown how to tackle properly?
Giannis Pappas
But shit is gonna happen. You gotta realize, bro, us playing football is a fucking wreck every tackle.
Chrissy Chaos
I know.
Giannis Pappas
Like, all right, so you. You think about the airbag busting you in your face. Every time you stop, eventually you're gonna get a concussion.
Chrissy Chaos
Sure.
Giannis Pappas
If you get hit the right way.
Pac Man Jones
Right.
Giannis Pappas
Or you might be lucky and don't get hit the right way and don't have a concussion.
Chrissy Chaos
I like.
Pac Man Jones
So it's just sort of a warrior thing. Like, you're. You're playing the sport. You just got to know that that's it's gonna happen.
Giannis Pappas
Well, I'm saying, like, out of my whole career, I've never been concussed. Now, I broke my neck, but I was still alert, yelling like, yo, go. I can't move. Help.
Chrissy Chaos
Right?
Giannis Pappas
But I've never got hit where I'm like, Right. Like, never. Never had that happen.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. Yeah. It's just because, you know, you've because it is. It is interesting though because they always say the CTE happens so much in the NFL. But then you look at a sport like rugby where they're tackling with no helmets and it almost never happens. Cte.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, but rugby is not football, bro. Come on.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, we talking about.
Pac Man Jones
Exactly.
Giannis Pappas
It's like real life bullets out here, right?
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
And people. People like Joke and Kiki and ha about different sports and shit. But like, just think about football. If LeBron's son was the. Let's say LeBron was a running back and his son was who he is now in basketball, was coming to play football, he would never play.
Chrissy Chaos
No.
Giannis Pappas
Because he'd get killed.
Chrissy Chaos
He get killed, right?
Giannis Pappas
As far as I'm talking about compact collision. Like the football is way different than any sport, bro.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Giannis Pappas
Like.
Pac Man Jones
And I'm feels like a car accident. Right.
Giannis Pappas
When you get hit, it's just live bullets.
Pac Man Jones
Right?
Giannis Pappas
Like for real like playing for Job. And I know all the teams I played on and I've been captains of the defense.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Giannis Pappas
We ain't helping nobody up and we are really out there trying to demolish people.
Chrissy Chaos
Right? Yeah. Who was the hardest guy for you to tackle, if there was one? I know you could tackle anybody, but was. It's like if I had to put. This guy is tough to get down. Who was it?
Giannis Pappas
I would say Ricky. Ricky Williams.
Pac Man Jones
It's like a little muscle.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, it was a muscle. I won't say nobody went. Pittsburgh. Pittsburgh had a good running back one a couple years. But yeah, I would say Ricky Williams.
Chrissy Chaos
Ricky Williams.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Did you.
Pac Man Jones
Did you. Yeah. Derrick Henry. You guys overlap? No. Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
I play against Derrick.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. Is he.
Chrissy Chaos
He seems tough.
Pac Man Jones
I mean, that's.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah. But like you could hit Derrick Henry low. Ricky Williams is like. Don't matter how low you get, he's going to get down there with.
Chrissy Chaos
Keep going. Saquon would probably be hard to tackle.
Giannis Pappas
Like that's a better match for me. Like maybe for a taller guy or somebody. Like. But like my pad level.
Chrissy Chaos
You could hit him hard. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, dude. Because the cornerbacks are coming, flying and the safety, I mean, that is wild. Like high speed collision hard. Like when a receiver's over the middle extending his arms. I mean. Jesus Christ.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
I got a good question. Who's the best white quarterback of all time?
Chrissy Chaos
White cornerback.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
There's only one. Jason Seahorn.
Pac Man Jones
Right? That's it, right? I think that's it.
Giannis Pappas
I know.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, that's. I think there's only one.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
So I guess that's it.
Chrissy Chaos
Him. We only have one. And then we got one for real. And then you got. Christian McAffrey is the one. White running back. That's it.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, well, John.
Giannis Pappas
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. We got John Riggins. My boy was good, though, who played with. He played with me with the Bengals and played with the Patriots out of Wisconsin. Damn. What's his name?
Chrissy Chaos
Oh, what, not Wes Welker? What was Wes Welker?
Pac Man Jones
No, he was a receiver.
Giannis Pappas
Running back.
Pac Man Jones
The only other thing I can think of, John Riggins from the Redskins. The only other.
Chrissy Chaos
I don't. I mean, to me it's just McAffrey.
Giannis Pappas
Oh, I can't think his name. What? 33.
Chrissy Chaos
Who the hell is it? Jesse White, running back, Patriots.
Giannis Pappas
Bengals. He play with Bengals.
Chrissy Chaos
Patriots and Bengals. Let's see. There's only going to be one.
Giannis Pappas
And you ask me, how do I ever forget people names?
Chrissy Chaos
Right? There it is.
Pac Man Jones
James White.
Chrissy Chaos
No, he. Yeah, James White. He said play for Wisconsin.
Giannis Pappas
No, it's not James White, but the name.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay.
Pac Man Jones
Caitlyn Clark.
Giannis Pappas
Not Caitlin Clark. Rex.
Pac Man Jones
Rex Burkhead.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Giannis Pappas
Rex Burkhead was a fucking dog.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. Look at him right there.
Chrissy Chaos
Look at that guy. Rex Burkhead. Yeah, there it is.
Giannis Pappas
Rex was good. Rex, probably. He's probably by far the best white. White running back that I've. I've seen in person.
Pac Man Jones
Right. Christian McCaffrey, obviously the best. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Pac Man Jones
And then shout out John Riggins, he played for the Redskins. That's about it.
Chrissy Chaos
An old school guy.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Well, we need one.
Pac Man Jones
Oh, Frank Gifford. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
But what would you rather have? Would you rather have a white running back or a black field goal kicker? Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
How come there's no black field goal kicker?
Chrissy Chaos
There should be. There's one black punter who was on the radio.
Giannis Pappas
You know why? Because it's like doing surgery. It's like brain surgery, being a kicker. Guys don't want that. Pressure.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, the pressure of it, dude, it is. So did you ever, like, say anything to a kicker when he missed, like, hey, lit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So guys are. Guys are tough on the kicker. If you miss, go kick.
Giannis Pappas
I don't. I can't speak for everybody else, but.
Pac Man Jones
You ever slap one?
Giannis Pappas
No, I ain't never slapped one, but I. It's like Mike n missed a big kick with us when we was with the Bengals, and I just couldn't hold it. I just went off like, you got one job to do and Mike is my boy, too.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. Months. Was. He like, sorry, he left.
Giannis Pappas
He just Hurried up and get out of there.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, he just. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
I mean that much.
Chrissy Chaos
It is pressure, man. It is pressure.
Pac Man Jones
Imagine like it is.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, you and it's pressure because your ass in there playing ping pong while we in meetings. And like the kickers don't do, bro.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, they just can't, they just, they don't have to be at any of those meetings and practice, do they?
Giannis Pappas
They had the team meeting and special team meeting.
Pac Man Jones
So, so let me ask you again. What is the point of the field goal in the game of football?
Giannis Pappas
Like, bro, that's that, that, that permanent games.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, but that's the problem. Don't you think, don't you think it's.
Giannis Pappas
I love it. Like, I, I, I hope they stop fucking with the game. Let's put the kickoff back to where it was. I don't have no problem with you backing the kick up five yards because we want more returns as a returner. I want more returns. Cool with that. But all this shit where you up here? Half line. It's a practice drill.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
I mean, what is, what are they doing now? It's like, it's, it's like a formality. It just starts at the 24.
Chrissy Chaos
Trying to ruin a good thing. I heard them saying that because Steph Curry has revolutionized the NBA that they want to remove the three point point line. Yeah. I'm like, are you stupid?
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, just.
Chrissy Chaos
You should make a seven point shot. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. Pac Man's gotta go.
Chrissy Chaos
Oh, Pacman's gotta go. Yeah. Who is it is his wife or his pr? Because we're not listening to the pr. This white people not listen to. This is what Rex Burkhead's doing. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Look at that.
Chrissy Chaos
It's outside.
Pac Man Jones
It looks like a fun little kicker.
Chrissy Chaos
This is Pac man tells us to go. He's out of here. Yeah, but this guy, no way. All right, fine. See you later, Pac Man. Where can people see you?
Giannis Pappas
Hey, you could catch me on everything, man. The Pac Man Jones show. Right now, I'm brought to you by betonline Ag Politely Raw. We got good things going on and we just, we talk about everything. I'll probably have a conversation about this interview today on the show, so.
Pac Man Jones
Nice.
Chrissy Chaos
Hell yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Also, he's a good follow. He's a great follow on the Gram.
Giannis Pappas
Oh, yeah.
Pac Man Jones
I love following him on the Gram.
Giannis Pappas
I be, I'll be talking a little.
Pac Man Jones
On you go crazy like Gram.
Giannis Pappas
Yeah, real Pac Man 24 on the ground.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Love it, bro. Thank you, man. Thank.
Giannis Pappas
Smell me.
Chrissy Chaos
All right, well, Pac Man Jones just left and Giannis wants to talk more about samurai because the kid is horned up.
Pac Man Jones
I'm horned up. And boy, his hair, like his hair was. Almost looked like he was a samurai.
Chrissy Chaos
He really looked great. And I will tell you, I mean, you didn't see him. We'll post a picture of it because we took a picture after. He's wearing a full sweater. He's wearing a sweater and then pants that are the same sweater material. And they're bell bottoms like Kendrick Lamar.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. And they're like just dirty because they're just sweeping the floor. It's almost like a skateboard.
Chrissy Chaos
What's happened now is with culture. This is why culture is wild and you can never predict anything. Is that now culture, Cultural fashion for black men has, is now turning into women in the 70s.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
That's just what their fashion has become. And you would have never guessed that.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. And it is interesting, you know, and.
Chrissy Chaos
Baggy pants and Nazis are back.
Pac Man Jones
They're back. Nazis are huge right now. It is really. I mean, Nazis and baggy clothes are back as a good way to go.
Chrissy Chaos
Get yourself a suit from Hugo Boss to do a nice deal.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. The early 90s came back and so did the. The 40s. Yeah, it's 40s in the 90s are back.
Chrissy Chaos
Back, baby.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. The mixture of the 40s.
Chrissy Chaos
What else did you want to say about samurai's. Cuz you're a goop, I'm a goop.
Pac Man Jones
And I just, I think we just cap it off with a nice cherry on top to say that that is in the Japanese culture. And then when the gun came to.
Chrissy Chaos
The Portuguese from the Portuguese dirt bags.
Pac Man Jones
Then the Japanese, the samurais resisted it because it was like a dishonorable way because you could kill from distance. But then, then they gave in and then they became the biggest gun maker on the. They were making more guns than Europe, than everybody. They made all these guns. They made all these weapons. They just started making guns. Guns.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Pac Man Jones
And they became militarized. And then that samurai thing was still in there though, because, you know, they, when they got the guns, they turned into a strong nation. They closed the borders. No foreigners. And it was a unified Japan. And then they started attacking other places.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
And they started attacking and they wanted to control. They attacked Korea, they attacked China because listen. And they were dirtbags. They weren't nice.
Chrissy Chaos
They were dirtbags in World War II. They needed to be stopped.
Pac Man Jones
Dude. Dude. And that's the thing. They were brutal. So I think the thing about the samurai is I wanted to mention is like we talk about the honor, we talk about the code, we talk about that they were these high minded warrior poets and everything, but really at the end of the day they were human like everybody else.
Chrissy Chaos
Yes.
Pac Man Jones
And they were dirt bags and they went and they raped and they pillaged and then they went to China and raped and pillaged. They went to Korea, they raped and pillaged, they killed, massacred children, everybody. And then World War II comes and like you said, that samurai culture that was in the Japanese warrior code where they kill themselves. And that's what's so funny is these guys just used their own deaths as weapons.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Which is very funny.
Chrissy Chaos
It's what it is.
Pac Man Jones
It's just they use their deaths as weapons. And then they became that samurai code, became kamikaze pilots.
Chrissy Chaos
And they've been doing it honestly from the beginning of time that most cultures do.
Pac Man Jones
And a lot of the people when they were, when they started losing would just the civilians. A lot of them would just kill the themselves.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Because they'd rather. They just was honorable.
Giannis Pappas
They.
Pac Man Jones
There's footage that Americans got of just civilians jumping off cliffs.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Because they're just. It's the Japanese way. And I think that's why Lexus is such a good car.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Pac Man Jones
Because if they make a mistake, they feel more.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Like they dishonored the company.
Chrissy Chaos
Right.
Pac Man Jones
And they just walk out a window.
Chrissy Chaos
That's why. That's why the Japanese flag football team is able to beat the United States. Because they lose. They kill themselves.
Pac Man Jones
They kill themselves.
Chrissy Chaos
It's just what is. You'll just see them hanging from their bedrooms with flags around.
Pac Man Jones
And that's why Lexus is a great car. Do you maybe we can like really bring great comedy back. Like if you bomb, you just got to go walk out of a window.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah, yeah. It's what it is.
Pac Man Jones
Samurai culture.
Chrissy Chaos
Samurai culture.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
So. Oh yeah. Jesse's got to go get a pen because we're about to read the Patreon names. Of course, at patreon.com history HYENAS is where all the fun happens. We got great episodes there. We've brought back Walk and Talks. We were doing a lot of stuff@patreon.com.
Pac Man Jones
Don'T forget our live show. We just. There's a live show up there. It was a great show. We did a Gotham Comedy Club that's up there.
Chrissy Chaos
And you know what we're going to start doing now? We're going to start live streaming our live because they're so much fun. So if you can't get to our city. The only way you could see them is@patreon.com history hyenas. And that's coming soon. And here we go. Yeah. Keep throwing me the pen.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. And see me coming up in Rochester, Cleveland and San Diego. Get your tickets at History Hyenas is back dot com.
Chrissy Chaos
Go over there. History hyenasisback dot com for Giannis's dates. And then I got all my dates. I'm in Austin and Dallas and Houston in April. I'm in Albany at the Egg. And I am in New Haven, Connecticut at College Street Music Hall. Those are my April dates. And then September 11th, 11th, Madison Square Garden, New York City. And then just check out all the dates. And then also, dude, we got some sweet merch up@history.com but the fun happens there. And patreon.com history hyenas. Okay, here we go. Welcome to the matriarchy. We got Justin dj. Then we got Fee Flow Fum. I'm the finger in Christy's bum. Okay, Nice. Three dollar bill for a Blackstone Grill.
Pac Man Jones
Okay.
Chrissy Chaos
Like that. John dillon. Homer Holloway Jr. Then we got Chrissy D. Peel back the fume, hood on a muzzy's pee and give it a kiss for me.
Pac Man Jones
Okay.
Chrissy Chaos
Then we got Biden, Secretary of Transsexual Defense. If Donnie wasn't busy building the fence.
Pac Man Jones
Drexler. Good one.
Chrissy Chaos
Drexler.
Pac Man Jones
Good one.
Chrissy Chaos
Kevin Hoenicki. Then we got Peace. Smaller than Yanni's unibrow.
Pac Man Jones
Okay.
Giannis Pappas
Okay.
Chrissy Chaos
Yanni. Cyclopopus. Sounds like a drug try.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Put me on the list or fill my booty with your fist.
Pac Man Jones
We're gonna. We're gonna put that on the list.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
We got our first list. You got. You're on the list.
Pac Man Jones
That. That guy's got a leaky roof.
Chrissy Chaos
Vinky stagina, sticky vagina like that.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Then we got Annaleen's lipstick covered Sig from Finland.
Pac Man Jones
Rest of the list. Yeah, Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
I like shout out to our Finnish fan.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Donnie T's and Ladder 14. Donnie T. Send Ladder 14 to Gaza.
Pac Man Jones
Oh, it's a Drexler. It's a funny one, though. Very funny. Laugh fact.
Chrissy Chaos
Then we got blonde hair, blue eyes. Where's my Hugo Boss?
Pac Man Jones
Okay.
Chrissy Chaos
Hey, Nazi one.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Then we got Barney Rubble as my hall pass. Somebody wants to bag my dad.
Pac Man Jones
Drexler. Chicken finger more, by the way.
Chrissy Chaos
Shout out to the fans in Tampa and Orlando who came up to my shows. Tampa. Tony was in the building and he really appreciates the.
Pac Man Jones
Someone took a picture of him, snuck A picture.
Chrissy Chaos
People took multiple pictures of him. He was taking pictures outside Tampa in Orlando. And I really. I really appreciate that, and thank you to whatever fan bought him new compression socks. He really appreciates that. So then we got Sacajawea, AKA Lewis, and Clark's Emotional Support Native. Then we got. Let's Build a new Panama Canal between Yanni's eyes.
Pac Man Jones
That's a good one.
Chrissy Chaos
That's a good one.
Pac Man Jones
That's a good one for the list, though, right?
Chrissy Chaos
Or. What do you think?
Pac Man Jones
What do you think? That's a good one. That's a good one. Separate my eyes with canal.
Chrissy Chaos
I like that.
Pac Man Jones
I like that.
Chrissy Chaos
It's actually not a bad idea to think about for the future. Yeah. Michael Blum, Cole Harris. Then we got Ari's Hemorrhoid Death Battle. Taylor Hall, Crystal G. Then we got Small Dick. Come Quick. It's what it is.
Pac Man Jones
Chicken Finger. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Then we got Barack is a UCF because of Michelle's BBC Namin.
Pac Man Jones
Okay.
Chrissy Chaos
I met Chrissy. And Frank Lee. He gay.
Pac Man Jones
Frank Lee. He's Frank Lee.
Chrissy Chaos
Frankly, gay. Got him. All right. Like that.
Pac Man Jones
More of a fact.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay. Then we got bidets for the table so we can pee on our chest.
Pac Man Jones
These for the tables.
Chrissy Chaos
Close. Because I say every time I get water in.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
My body. Right. So that's why they're saying the bidets. Okay. I like it. Then we got Hold Me Closer, Tony Danza Tongue My Fart Box on the guideway like a highway. Okay. J9099. Then we got Starling. Connecting me to Yanni's hiney Hole.
Pac Man Jones
Funny.
Chrissy Chaos
Then we got mixing creatine with electrolytes and committing suicide. Okay. Want to call for help?
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
XM10. Rebecca Diaz. John Cena's Mandarin instructor, aka Xen Pun.
Pac Man Jones
It's really funny. I'm gonna drex through that. That's really funny.
Chrissy Chaos
Then we got Harriet Tubman's Underground Glass Table Party.
Pac Man Jones
Get that?
Chrissy Chaos
I don't know. All right, but thank you.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Tullock Brown, Jophie Simmons. Then we got Indian Jones and his Temple of Fumes.
Pac Man Jones
Put them on the list.
Chrissy Chaos
Put them on the list.
Pac Man Jones
Put them on the list.
Chrissy Chaos
Like Indiana Jones. Temple of. Dude, this is very good.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Yudai Sawa Carlitos. Then we got Paint and Puff Daddy Leroy Daniel Techart. Ladder 69. Then we got Tim Dillon and Yanni's trans daughter. I guess. Like if you guys had a trans daughter.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay. Anthony Dale Roberts, Milkman Tevin. Bryce Mitchell. Bryce Mitchell's fishing buddy.
Pac Man Jones
That's funny, because Bryce Mitchell he's an MMA fighter and he's. He hates Jews, but. So. Yeah, that's funny. Okay.
Chrissy Chaos
Andrew Turtle. Taint.
Pac Man Jones
Andrew Taint is a chicken.
Chrissy Chaos
Chicken finger Cash Patel, Cab smell. Did we walk into one? Is it on the list?
Pac Man Jones
Walked into one, but again, it's one of those. It's like the Oven Dodger. I mean, it's a. But you walk into one.
Chrissy Chaos
What do you want to do here?
Pac Man Jones
I want to list them.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay.
Pac Man Jones
I'm going to list them. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
All right. Then we got Throwing Frisbees out of a Chimneys, 1945. Can't do that. Walked into one. That is not okay.
Pac Man Jones
Good one.
Chrissy Chaos
That's not okay, though.
Pac Man Jones
Not okay.
Chrissy Chaos
That one we can't say.
Pac Man Jones
Can't do that one.
Chrissy Chaos
Then we got the UCF recruiter. Chris, your card was declined. Please call us back asap. Okay? Okay. That's a funny one.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Then we got. Make no mistake, at the end of the day, I got fumes. It's what it is, cuz. Taint fumes. Because my clit is bigger than my dick. Katie Crane, Long Island Sauce Monkey. Chrissy was a toot for hey Baby, but now he know Gay Bay. Okay. Walker Cotton. Josh Route. Kyle O'Grady. Alex Perez. Make no mistake, I have a beaner wiener.
Pac Man Jones
If he just did beaner weiner, that.
Chrissy Chaos
Would have been good.
Pac Man Jones
That would have been a great chicken finger. There we go.
Chrissy Chaos
I bleed red, white and blue, but I lean white.
Pac Man Jones
Okay.
Chrissy Chaos
Slumpy Crump.
Pac Man Jones
Okay.
Chrissy Chaos
Chris Eggleston. Tammy the X2. Ready to get cracked open and cleaned out after I finish my shift. Me and you drinking brews, eating Netanyahu's Jew glue.
Pac Man Jones
Still, it's a good one, Drexler.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay. Then we got Yadolf Yittler. Touched my schnitzler and cooked me all the way through. Okay.
Pac Man Jones
Whoa. Walk the other one. But Yadolf Yittler is funny. That's where you cut it for. Yay. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Then we got Nico Franks and Beans Harrison. Guess that's the map.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, well, that's more of a fact. Security.
Chrissy Chaos
I mean, that's bad because that Kyrie's out.
Pac Man Jones
I mean, everyone's done. They have to forfeit games. Yeah, I think they're going to have to forfeit games because they don't have enough players.
Chrissy Chaos
Are you. Is that actual fact?
Pac Man Jones
That's a fact.
Chrissy Chaos
Saw you in D.C. but I'd rather see you in me. Call me Chrissy. Dylan King Francisco Ruiz. Then we got your sausage linky in my Buddha. Chedge is a coin. Is a coinky. Dinky. Okay. Adam French, Clark Shininski, half Greek, full fumes. It's what it is, cuz. Chrissy votes red. Yanni votes blue. Schultz isn't black, but he might be a Jew.
Pac Man Jones
It's a haiku.
Chrissy Chaos
It's a good Drexler Huff in the situation's muff. Now that's box cannot disparage the family. And that is not okay. We won't stand for that.
Pac Man Jones
It's box breathing.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. What it is, cuz Ed. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Can't do it.
Chrissy Chaos
Can't do it. Then we got rfqd. Please don't ban baked zooty Sauce Monkey. Yeah. Sean Brewer. Andrew Garland. Then we got last name Kaminsky. Make no mistake, Jack the Ripper is my uncle Nick Brockmire. Salsa monkey TRUMP 2024. My dad's gone. Okay. Charmaine Childs. White power button instead of power bottom. Oh, he said white power bottom. Yeah, I misread. I'm sorry about that. Bad read.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Kaylin Crawford. Mikhail Gorgeous Instead of Gorbachev.
Pac Man Jones
That's beautiful.
Chrissy Chaos
I like that.
Pac Man Jones
Ticket finger.
Chrissy Chaos
Ticket finger. Milt Anthony Dees. Chrissy is so into meat. He has Tim Dylan beat Joshy Washy Nutty Wy Raphael Salgado. Cuban with a leaky glue gun. AKA the Cuban Missile Crisis.
Pac Man Jones
It's good. Good.
Chrissy Chaos
Thomas Arthur Adrian. Then we got Great Whites Pyro Guy. Okay. Alexis Ferguson, Quirky Lewis and the Fumes.
Pac Man Jones
That's great.
Chrissy Chaos
What do we think?
Pac Man Jones
That's great. Yeah, I'm going to put it on the list.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay.
Pac Man Jones
Lewis and the Fumes is funny.
Chrissy Chaos
Like it?
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Kenneth Bishop. Trans Porn Matters.
Pac Man Jones
Drexler.
Chrissy Chaos
Drexler Chicken Finger More. Then we got Chrissy's prostate versus Yanni from back in the day. Okay. Then we got. You're going to love my nuts. No choice because Slap Chop is back. Okay. Connor Max Fumeless Joe Jackson. Which we've had before, but it is a good one.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, it's a good one.
Chrissy Chaos
Lauren. Then we got Obama is a Muzzy who drowned the chef in Comzy. Okay, funny. Alex Garcia. Then we got Promethazine Paul Bunyan Parker Venus Anthony Ortega, Victor Oquendo Matthew Looking for glue from a Fumi Jew. Pee Pee Poo Poo Butazo Paige. Then we got Oops. Glued in my mouth. Didn't spit it out. Does that make me gay?
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, a little bit.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
More. No more Self love.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay. Yeah. Hunter Straw Chris Candy. Then we got Dead Ass Yaya's cookies make my peen tingle and Leaky Jose Barrera. Then we got Hyenas eat free on Tuesdays, but you need to check your glue guns at the door. One an oopsie daisy69. My wife is a haggis monkey. Her fumes smell like Melly Gibbs, and when she comes, she screams freedom as a Scottish joke. Yeah, yeah. Protect me on the train. I need science to fix that.
Pac Man Jones
Oh, that's a Maurice A.
Chrissy Chaos
Joke. Okay. Nicole and Kaylor Franklin, Joshua Gliddell Bear Brum Emery, Victor McCoy, Kevin Flamer, Samuel Batters Sage Archibald. Fume. Fume. Sane Bolt. Beef Patty Monkey Few Same bolt Would have been good. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Guys, got to edit yourself. I'll give you a chicken finger Honore for Fuse Bolt. That's good.
Chrissy Chaos
Preassemble. Bobby Mack went to Tim Dillon's for game night. We play Twink Twister.
Pac Man Jones
Funny. Almost. You got to edit Tim Dillon's. What is it? Twink Twister. That would have been on the list.
Chrissy Chaos
Twink Twister would have made it.
Pac Man Jones
That would have made it.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. Dan Gleesack. Nathan McCarroll, Noah Woodruff, Daniel Mike Murphy. Three inches deep and one finger in the stinker. Big Nuts. Bill Hangels Bond. Marty Vorachuk. Rogan's Dick. All right, one more page. Yeah, these are.
Pac Man Jones
We're catching up.
Chrissy Chaos
And then, by the way, guys, we are almost caught up on the Patreon names. That's how supportive you guys are@patreon.com history. Ian is like, we are. It took us three months to catch up, so we really appreciate the support.
Pac Man Jones
And when we catch up, we'll start reading all the names again.
Chrissy Chaos
Yes.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Yo, Jangles. One of Jerry's kids. Not my father's name, but that's what he called me. I'm a Franks and beans kid. Jerry Lewis. Brandon Towel. Peter Long. Lara. Puerto Ricans aren't just Mexican islanders. It's what it is. Okay. I'm a Fumi girl in a Fumi world. Life in plastic. It's fantastic. Mark Runziti, UK Sauce Monkey. Oh, wow. I got a Italian kid in the uk. Yeah, Grayson. Two knuckles in. And now my P turned white.
Pac Man Jones
Put him on the list.
Chrissy Chaos
All right.
Pac Man Jones
Put him in the list. Put him on the list.
Chrissy Chaos
I like it. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
He made himself cover too.
Chrissy Chaos
Big as a. Yeah. Drippy Stiffy Spark that spliffy. Papa's getting second while Chrissy plays hummus cannon. Okay, Jojo. Sir. The Muzzy Wuzzies hit the second tower.
Pac Man Jones
Drexler Frog Drexler.
Chrissy Chaos
Taffy Nips. Davon Dixon. Then we got Sandusky Shower Fun time.
Pac Man Jones
Oh, that's a. That's A. I can't do that. Can't do that. 1.
Chrissy Chaos
Chris Justos, Nicholas Wasner, Yanni Suzuki. Turret, Emily Claire. Tattoo Sleepy Joe 20. Louis Christian, Patrick Robert Lucursi. Wife just left and she's. Hold on. Wife just left and she Cocka hoops. I can't read this one. Wife just left and she cock. She cocka hoops. 2. Eminem. Lil cockatutor too. I'm sorry. That was just. I can't. I think you might have a typo.
Pac Man Jones
I just learned English.
Chrissy Chaos
Yes, Kalin. Then we got IKEA monkey with a Honduran wife and our Ubermensch son.
Pac Man Jones
IKEA monkey again.
Chrissy Chaos
Are you saying you're Swedish?
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. You're Swedish.
Chrissy Chaos
That's funny.
Pac Man Jones
I like it. For a Swedish to call my Kia monkeys.
Chrissy Chaos
That would work.
Pac Man Jones
That would work, yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
Cave diver in Pelosi's Tits. I'm near Madaraya. Nathan Bramhall, Petey Bones, Christopher Lopez, Jordan Fe Wax, Damian Rodriguez. I scream for boys Cream.
Pac Man Jones
Oh, boy.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
Jesus Christ.
Chrissy Chaos
Amelia Airport.
Pac Man Jones
Amelia Airport. That's chicken.
Chrissy Chaos
Chicken finger. That's a good one.
Pac Man Jones
That's a good one.
Chrissy Chaos
DrUnion88. Half Sauce Monkey, half diner monkey with no fumes. Vinnie Troiano, Owen Harris, Joe O. Gecko, Brian Mitchell Millen, Sal Monella, Alex Harrison.
Pac Man Jones
Salmonella's funny. Chicken finger.
Chrissy Chaos
Then we got Dirty Harry Sanchez, who gave Helen of Troy a Cleveland steamer and kicked out of ancient Rome for inventing the Coliseum.
Pac Man Jones
Okay.
Chrissy Chaos
All right. I mean, we got two more pages. Should we just finish this off today? Should we just be done?
Pac Man Jones
And then we're caught up?
Chrissy Chaos
And then we're caught up. That's from a few weeks ago, that list.
Pac Man Jones
Oh, so we're.
Chrissy Chaos
But I'm saying. But, like, we should get through these. Oh, yeah. Yeah. All right, so if you guys can hold on for two more minutes, let us just get. And there might be, by the way, there might be hall of Famers.
Pac Man Jones
Could be.
Chrissy Chaos
That's the good news about this list. Is anyone who's saying on Patreon or YouTube, get rid of the list. You're out of your fucking mind. This is the show. Okay, here we go. Is this kid Shane Todd here? Tell him he's got to hold on one second. One second, one second. Shane Todd's here. Shane Todd, great Irish comedian from Belfast, is coming on this Patreon. All right. Garrett Garman, B. McQueen, Giovanni Diaz, Horny Gorny, the Pierogi Monkey. Father Bill is dunking his trussel in my sphincter. Neo David Gutierrez, Jose Rodriguez Blumpkin. Fumesies confuse me XMS International switch my patreon from are you garbage to y'all Zion pharma slang and sledge 28 still use my glue gun as okay, 28 I still use my glue gun as a periscope in the tub. It's what it is. It's funny.
Pac Man Jones
Okay.
Chrissy Chaos
Piss jennings Power stroker Leroy Frisbee Richard Bia Blue pizza New York screwed in Jack S.N. alexander the straight Alexander the Straight yeah. Chicken Chicken Finger Salon Jack Sny, Luke Martin Lewis Verdusco, Trip Windham Robert Sassaman, Dagwood Dusseldorf, your friendly neighbor I have the clap Nick Ravine Aiden Sullivan Elon's red rocket gave me German gate Elon's red rocket gave me a German salute in the poop shoot Hitler's great grandson and make no mistake, I will carry on the bloodline. Walked in woods yeah Darcy Tom Franco J Scar Matthew Cora Pseudo phallus in my anal palace Anthony Anthony Bundk Ken Robbins Ben Papa George Jose Clinton Andy Rose Chico Matt Bradley, Liam Clark, Amy still tariff Trump Daniels My dad survived Tower 2, but the kid still covered his eyes when two guys on Netflix start to make a sex flick.
Giannis Pappas
Put.
Pac Man Jones
Him on the list.
Chrissy Chaos
What it is, it's just the truth. Yeah, Fauci made my go ouchie. It's what it is. Father Bill needs a blue pill for his pisha deal. Herschel Golden, Steinberg the screwed in Uncle Uden, Louis Pantaleone. I leave the microwave on around my Eastern Hemi roommate. As a reminder, put him on the list. Okay, okay. See, we got two lists on the last page here. Yeah, Awkward place between hey, babe and history. Hyenas. Drex Drexer, Samantha Hunt, Daniel Ligar, Hagemeister Aiden with the centimeter Peter, keep that thing on my. Keep that thing on me. Saragooti Lou Skunt. Our border is like your mom's box. It needs to be tightened. Okay, okay. Alexander the Great $3 bill aka Magic Johnson's infected glue gun. Okay, okay. Walked into one John Daly, Nehar Patel, Epstein's guy. Land frauding and space docking. Chrissy D. A memoir Fupacabra Eslo Ks like Chupacabra. Nice. Caitlin Fisher, Chrissy D And Yanni P. But my girl one titty. Buy my girl one titty, I'll buy my girl one titty. Sorry about that. Maybe we can Zachariah Leahy, Pedro Laros, Natalie Farron, Tyler Hathaway, Stephanie Simmons, Scandal Carlson Younger guy Ass Impact theory Pamela Anderson, Bidet nozzle pov.
Pac Man Jones
Put it On the list.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay, fine.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, that's.
Chrissy Chaos
We got three on the list. Yeah.
Pac Man Jones
That's hilarious.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. UCF with a wife and kids. It's what it is. It's a lot of us. Wes, Zach Golder, Christian. Donnie T. Got elected, so the Leroy's are going to need bail.
Pac Man Jones
Okay.
Chrissy Chaos
Josh Archer, Chrissy's cuck Chair Chronicles. Fuzzy Wuzzy Cuz. He's fuddy body filled my hubby with cummies. Arlene Dooley, Spud Monkey. David Marquez. Randor Amos Hitler Vader. The ass eating masturbator. 69 father.
Pac Man Jones
Need the 69 there.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. Father Bill's favorite ballplayer jock. Let me see your Peter son. Okay. A Habibi Netanyahu. Lily Pat Mays, Mike Dewar. My piece produces glue. When Chrissy takes off a shoe. Gay Zhang Xian.
Pac Man Jones
Gay Zhan Jing. On its own would have been great.
Chrissy Chaos
Yeah. Okay. And last but not least half was a hot pocket. Wow. That is not okay.
Pac Man Jones
Right?
Chrissy Chaos
All right. All right. So here we go.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, we got to do it. Okay.
Chrissy Chaos
All right. Let's do it.
Pac Man Jones
Kids got a heart out of 230.
Chrissy Chaos
Kids got a heart out of 230. All right, so let's go. Here we go. Let's read these names. Okay, so we got Julis and the Fumes two knuckles in. Now my P turned white. Okay.
Pac Man Jones
Julie Lewis and the fumes is going to be Drexler. Good. Any other day. All right. For Dewey Lewis and the fumes. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
All right, so Julis and the Fumes is out.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
So they're out.
Pac Man Jones
Drexler.
Chrissy Chaos
Drexlered out. Two knuckles in. Now my P turned white.
Pac Man Jones
Tender.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay. My dad survived Tower two, but the kid still covered his eyes when two guys on Netflix start to make a sex flick.
Pac Man Jones
Funny. But you're Drexler.
Chrissy Chaos
You're Drexler. But it is funny.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
I leave the microwave on around my Eastern Hemi roommate. As a reminder, we're going to Drexler. Okay. Direct.
Pac Man Jones
A good one. Now.
Chrissy Chaos
Pamela Anderson. Bidet nozzle POV contender. Contender. So that is still in.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
And turned white is still in. Okay. So then we got cash. Patel, Cab smell.
Pac Man Jones
It's a contender.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay, so that is still it.
Pac Man Jones
Okay.
Chrissy Chaos
Then we got. Put me on the list or fill my booty with your fist.
Pac Man Jones
We're going to Drex through that.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
An Eileen's lipstick colored Sig from Finland.
Pac Man Jones
We're going to Drexler it.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay. Let's build a new Panama. Panama Canal between Yanni's eyes.
Pac Man Jones
Good one. We're going to Drexler.
Chrissy Chaos
Drexler. Indian Jones and his temple of fumes.
Pac Man Jones
We're going to Drexler.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay, so that page is out. So the three ring.
Pac Man Jones
Yes.
Chrissy Chaos
Pamela Anderson's bidet nozzle pov. Two knuckles in and now my pee turned white. Or Cash Patel cab smell.
Pac Man Jones
It's a tough one again.
Chrissy Chaos
They're all tough.
Pac Man Jones
This one's tough.
Chrissy Chaos
Who do we got?
Pac Man Jones
Who do we got? This one I'm going to need help with.
Chrissy Chaos
Okay.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
I'm going to say if I had to take it all, I would say just because it made me really think, I would say two knuckles in and out. My P turned white. Okay, that's come YP is very funny. I like and I've never heard it.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, I like Pamela Anderson's bidet pov.
Chrissy Chaos
So. So we'll agree Cash Patel cap smell is out.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah. But yeah, it's a good one, though. Any other day. Yeah.
Chrissy Chaos
So I wish you didn't use Pamela Anderson.
Pac Man Jones
It just went bidet nozzle pov. Right. That's just funny.
Chrissy Chaos
So bidet nozzle POV on its own. On its own is fun. So does that get him in a tight race? Does that. Then give it to two knuckles in an MIP turned white.
Pac Man Jones
Yeah, we're going to get.
Chrissy Chaos
All right, so you are the winner. Go to his trainers. As back See your name up my lights. You are the PPW pseudo penis of the week. Two knuckles in and now my Pete turned white. All right.
Pac Man Jones
Chicken finger victory.
Chrissy Chaos
That's it.
Podcast Summary: "The Story of the Black Samurai w/ PACMan Jones"
Podcast Information:
In this episode of History Hyenas, comedians and history enthusiasts Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas dive deep into the fascinating world of samurai, blending historical facts with their signature humor. The episode, titled "The Story of the Black Samurai," explores the rich culture of the samurai, the legendary tale of the 47 Ronin, and introduces listeners to Yasuke—a remarkable figure often cited as the first black samurai in Japanese history.
The hosts begin by setting the stage for understanding samurai culture, comparing samurais to medieval European knights. They emphasize the dual nature of samurais as both fierce warriors and bureaucratic government officials.
Chris Distefano [07:00]: "They were good duelers and fighters, just like any other warrior class in history. But they were also bureaucratic because they were part of the government and were smart, trained individuals from a young age."
Distefano and Yannis discuss how the introduction of firearms by the Portuguese transformed the samurai from pure warriors into more administrative roles within Japanese society.
Yannis Pappas [07:25]: "They ended up becoming more administrative after the gun came to Japan via the Portuguese."
A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to the legendary tale of the 47 Ronin, a group of masterless samurais (ronin) who sought vengeance for the wrongful death of their lord, Asano Naganori. The story highlights themes of honor, loyalty, and the extreme measures samurais were willing to take to uphold their code.
Chris Distefano [24:13]: "47 of them just right there in the steps of the thing, just take their sword and plunge them into their chest and they all kill themselves in front of the Japanese council."
The hosts elaborate on the samurai code of honor, explaining how the ronin meticulously planned and executed their revenge before ultimately taking their own lives to demonstrate their unwavering loyalty.
Introducing Yasuke, the episode takes a unique turn by exploring the life of one of the few known black samurais. Yasuke's arrival in Japan, his relationship with the powerful warlord Oda Nobunaga, and his role in Japanese history are discussed in detail.
Chris Distefano [27:46]: "Did you know that there was a black samurai that wasn't Method Man? Yes, exactly."
Yasuke's story is portrayed as both extraordinary and somewhat controversial, with debates surrounding his exact status within the samurai hierarchy. While some historians argue that Yasuke may not have been a samurai in the traditional sense, his impact and legacy remain undeniable.
Chris Distefano [33:57]: "I do think Yatsuke was a samurai, even though technically he wasn't."
The hosts emphasize Yasuke's exceptional combat skills and physical prowess, attributing his rapid adaptation to samurai life to his unique background and training.
Yannis Pappas [30:24]: "Because swords can get it so, it's something like, you know, how do you do stuff, how do you think?"
Throughout the episode, Distefano and Yannis successfully blend historical insights with their comedic flair, making complex historical narratives accessible and entertaining. The story of Yasuke serves as a powerful reminder of the diverse and interconnected histories that shape our understanding of cultures like that of the samurai.
Yannis Pappas [33:55]: "Wu Tang Clang ain't nothing to fuck with."
As the episode wraps up, the hosts reiterate the importance of recognizing the shared humanity and universal themes present in history, despite cultural differences.
Notable Quotes with Timestamps:
This episode not only enlightens listeners about the intricate history of the samurai and the unique figure of Yasuke but also delivers laughs through the hosts' lively and unfiltered discussions.