A (0:02)

Acast powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend

B (0:09)

if you've ever dreamed of quitting your job to take your side hustle full time, listen up. This is Nikayla Matthews Akome, host of Side Hustle Pro, a podcast that helps you build and grow from passion project to profitable business. Every week you'll hear from guests just like you who wanted to start a business on the side. If you can't run a side hustle, you can't run a business. They share real tips and so I started connecting with all these people on LinkedIn and I thought Target supplier diversity was having office hours. Real advice Procrastination is the easiest form of resistance and the actual strategies they use to turn their side hustle into their main hustle. Getting back in touch with your tangible cash and sitting down and learning to give your money a job like it changes something. Check outside Hustle Pro every week on your favorite podcast, app and YouTube.

A (0:59)

Acast helps creators launch, grow and monetize their podcasts everywhere.

C (1:05)

Acast.com think Verizon is expensive? Think again. Anyone can bring their AT&T or T mobile bill to a Verizon store today and we'll give you a better deal. So bring us your bill, walk in, running pogo sticking, teleport, if you can ride on the back of a rollerblading yak or flying on the wings of a majestic falcon. Any way you can bring your AT&T or T mobile bill to a Verizon store today and we'll give you a better deal on the best network based on Root Metric's best overall mobile network performance. US 2nd half 2025 all rights preserved Must provide very recent postpaid consumer mobile bill in the name of the person redeeming the deal. Additional terms, conditions and restrictions apply.

A (1:42)

Good morning, good afternoon, or good evening, depending on where you are on the planet. Welcome to Ill Advised by Bill Nye the second Season. Oh yeah, and the clue is in the title, as always. And we are here to help you waste time in a creative way. We're here to help you squander a part of your day. We're here to give you a break from everything and to be as inconsequential as it's possible for anyone to be. That's what's on offer, which is not nothing. The risk is, when you get to my age, is that you cannot infrequently be mistaken for somebody who knows what's happening or knows what to do. You may have picked up A few things. When you get to my age, there are abuse, like online shopping, parking. That's a laugh. I couldn't park a car now. I don't drive. I don't own a car. I was questioned by a journalist recently who said, is it true? Which is always a bad start because it means, were you lying? Said, is it true that you don't own a car or a laptop? And I said, yeah, that's true. And he said, well, that's very austere of you. I said, is it? He said, yeah. He said, because you're denying yourself all these luxuries. I couldn't quite get my head around why he would think owning a car was a luxury. I mean, I get it if you need a car. I don't need a car. But for me, I love not owning a car. I can't get enough of it. It's a real luxury for me not to own a car. You don't have to put it anywhere. You don't have to think about it. You don't have to get it valeted. Maybe valeted should be on the band word list. Anyway, I will attempt to answer your questions without actually making things worse. Let's have a listen. Hello, Bill. Greg here from Massachusetts. I've noticed in more than one of your films that you're an exceptional dancer. To what do you attribute your terpsichorean gifts? And do you have any advice for those of us less blessed? Well, thank you, Greg from Massachusetts. That's really good to hear. I never feel that I've danced good in a film. I never watched the film, so I don't really know one way or the other, but I never feel like I've really got it down because, you know, like, there are days you can dance and there are days when you can't dance so good, or at all. And I remember standing on the edge of a big dance floor at a big party once, and it was like there was an invisible wall between me and the dance floor. I just couldn't move any further. And somebody came up behind me, a woman I didn't know. And she said, you're not dancing? And I said, no. And she said, is it vanity? And I said, yeah, I think you're probably right. Yeah, it's vanity. Because nobody required me to dance any good. I could have just gone on and enjoyed myself and thrown my limbs about, but I couldn't bring myself to do it without being the greatest dancer that any of those people had ever seen. So therefore I was paralyzed because there Was no chance of that. I once danced on a film and they told me to do it. And it was a day when I could really dance and I'd really, really danced. And I was. I thought I finally cracked it on a film where I've dance to my own satisfaction. And then the director said, yeah, great, I think we should film one. And we filmed one, but it was, you know, I've only got one of those in me a day, you know what I mean? I can't do those twice, not to the same tune. And I was so. I was devastated by it. And what did we do with the less blessed? You're not less blessed, you know, you don't have to be. I'm not Barishnikov or, you know, Gregory Hines, I'm just an enthusiast. But I do feel that on a good day, I can dance. I didn't used to dance for a long, long time because I got chronically self conscious. And also, when you're on television a bit, you feel like when you hit the dance floor, people are going to think, come on then, show us what you can do, you know, because you're supposed to be an actor and all that. And I became frozen by it. And then my daughter turned 18 and I spent all my money on a marquee and a dance floor. You know, they say, do you want the disco dance floor? Yeah, I want the disco dance. Do you want the sky at night ceiling? Yeah, I want the sky at night ceiling. My daughter's 18. Do you want the, you know, whatever. You just go, yeah, I want whatever. And anyway, I did that and I'd hired a band and then I. And I was going through a cigar period and I hid behind the marquee wearing shades, smoking a cigar. And I thought I was out of the picture for a while. And then my daughter came around the back of the tent and she said, dad, we have to start the dancing. Well, there's only one answer to that, which is, of course, yes. So we went in and I lumbered about, you know, in a limp sort of way, but it was my daughter, so who cares, you know. But then the band came on and I went completely mental for about four hours. And it was one of those days, you have to trust me, where I could really, really move. And I went insane with dancing, all that. I hadn't danced for years, probably about 10 years, and I went ape. And it was thrilling because I remembered I could dance. But you're not less blessed. It just means you just gotta. I mean, I used to hate Dancing with anyone because you had to look them in the eyes. And I never used to know what to do with my eyes or my face. And they would sort of smile at you and I would feel pressure to smile back. And it was very awkward making. And I remember when I first went to Liverpool when I was about 24 or something, and I used to go into Chauffeur's nightclub and I used to dance on my own because no one would be on the dance floor until about 3 o' clock in the morning when they were chemically encouraged enough to make it to the dance floor. But I used to hit the dance floor when there was no one there, because there was no one there and there was no one to look at you or judge you or anything. And I was dancing on my own and a girl came down and she said, why do you always dance on your own? And I said, well, because I always dance on my own. And she said, it's my birthday. And I said, and it was my birthday. And I said, it's my birthday. And she said, no, it's not. You're just saying that because I just said it was my birthday. I said, no, honestly, it's my birthday. And we ended up making a night of it, as you might say. And I was late for work the next day and my boss at the time was Jonathan Price, the notable actor, the celebrated actor, and he was my governor. And I went into work and I was late and he held up an imaginary card above my head and I didn't know anything about football at the time. And he said, do you know what this is? I said, no. He said, this is a yellow card. Do you know what a yellow card is? I said, no, I don't know what a yellow card is. He said, two of these, the next one is red and that means you're down the road. In other words, you're fired. And that's when I found out what yellow cards were in football. But anyway, back to the plot. Dancing? Yeah, dancing. I think you should do it every day. The other good thing is close your eyes. Just close your eyes, I dare you. And get on early. Don't hang around, don't wait. No one requires you to be any good. Just be honest. The other thing is, if you've procreated, it suddenly becomes dad dancing, which really gets to me. I did some research and Justin Timberlake has children. So there goes, you know, boom, straight out of the water, you know, I think Fred Astaire had a child. I'm not sure about that perhaps listeners can confirm that for me. So, yeah, but as soon as you have a child, apparently your dancing goes out the window and you become a dad dancer. No one ever says mum dancing. I've never heard anyone refer to mum dancing. It's just if you have a penis and you happen to have procreated anyway, I think it's unfair. Hi, Bill, this is Andrew from Lewisham. I've just bought a flat with a very, very small bathroom. Should I just have a shower because I only ever have showers or should I try and squeeze in a bath because everybody else seems to have baths more generally? What are your thoughts on showers versus baths? Thanks. Yeah, Andrew, I don't have a bath, actually. I do have a bath. I never take a bath. I haven't taken a bath in 20 years. I take a shower. I don't really remember when that happened, but it was quite a long time ago. I used to soak in the bath like people do. I think it's largely now because I don't want to see myself that closely. Do you know what I mean? It's like I avoid full length mirrors unless I'm, you know, dressed for the occasion. And then similarly, I don't want to really lie in a bath and examine my body with any great scrutiny. And I do think that showers are probably more hygienic. No, I mean because you wash the dirt off and it goes downwards and down the plug hole. You don't luxuriate in whatever, if you'll pardon me, Andrew, whatever dirt you might have accumulated throughout the day. So I'm with you. Forget about it. Even if you had a big apartment, you don't need a bath unless you've got, you know, friends that come or whatever who require a bath. And then that's a whole other thing, you know, because you might want to bath with a friend. And that's entirely, you know, that's your affair, Andrew. I wouldn't go into that plainly. Thank you. Hi, Bill, this is Carol and I love all your work, especially about time and pirate radio, because I work in radio. I'm contacting you from Michigan in the US and my question for you is, what was the first record album you had as a kid? Carol? I have an elder sister called Anna who was my guardian, my savior, my protector. If anybody wanted to do bad things to me when I was a kid, you'd have to get by my sister. And I just wish you luck with that because you got no chance. And I lived to impress her and I was born. This is how old I am at the cusp of vinyl 78s and 45s. I was a little bit behind the curve. I was probably. I don't know, I just got some pocket money and I went to the record shop and I bought. You know, I'm not ashamed to say it, I bought the teddy Bears Picnic by. And I can't remember, maybe one of our listeners will tell us who first recorded if you go down to the woods today. I don't suppose I'm allowed to sing that, but maybe I've done five seconds and they'll let me off, but I can't. If you go down in the woods today, you're in for a big surprise is one of the. Is the opening couplet. But anyway, and I took it back and it was a 78, one of those big old vinyl records. And I took it back and I showed it to my sister and she said, no, that's a 78. They do 45s now. You can sit on them and they don't break. And I was completely humiliated and it didn't go well. The first single I ever bought, I think, was Summertime by a singer called Billy Fury. And the first album, which I think my sister bought for me was Georgie Fame and the Blue Flames Live at the Flamingo, I think that's right. And Georgie Fame is a British. Very famous British R B jazz organ player. And I was. By then, I was listening to a lot of, you know, not a lot, because you couldn't get a lot of soul imports from America. But I was beginning my. My relationship with R B, what you now call R B. I would listen to things like by Major Lance, which I only found out the other day, was written by Curtis Mayfield. And I had no idea because I. I downloaded a tribute album to Curtis Mayfield and I discovered that amongst many other things, he'd written. Oh, I've just used a banned word. I just used the word amongst. I can't. I'm gonna have to kill myself. And my producer is laughing in my face. She's so happy. You can probably hear her in the background. And my. My staunch colleague at the other end of the table. You see, I'm not alone here. I know you would like to think of me as a lonely voice squandering time, and I am a lonely man. And if you have any ideas about that, please, you can contact me on Instagram. No, I'm kidding. But anyway, so. So that was the first album. Yeah. And then the Rolling Stones happened and the Beatles happened, and that was when you would go to the shop, they were always released on a Friday and you would go to the shop and you would try and buy the Stones album the day it came out. Because if you didn't get it the day it came out, you were a sad loser. And at the same time, Bob Dylan. The Bob Dylan albums I would also try and buy on the day they came out because it was that important. Hi, Bill. I'm Will from Cows on the Isle of Wight. I finally got to the point in life where I consider buying a bespoke suit. However, I've no idea how to go about it. And how do I choose a tailor? I'm assuming you're eminently qualified to answer. Thanks very much, Will. I think the first thing you have to consider is what kind of suit you want and not wait for somebody to tell you what kind of suit you want. The danger is if you go into a certain kind of tailor, they will impose a house style upon you. The first time anybody ever made a suit for me was when. The thing is about my job is that sometimes people give you things, but by the time they start giving you things you've already made some money and you wish that they'd started giving you things 20 years before. But the first time anybody actually made me a suit, I didn't realize I'd made decisions about the suit. I might have if ever I got one made, but apparently I had. And I said I wanted a single vent. If you have two vents, we can no longer have a conversation, Will. And I wanted a single pleat and I wanted to turn up and I wanted a generous trouser and I wanted two button jacket. That's about it really, with a. A substantial, but not over substantial lapel. And the tailor said to me, a very eminent man said to me that you can't have that. I said, I said, sorry. He said, well, you can't have a single pleat and a single vent. I said, I think I can. He said, no, you can't. I said, why not? He said, because you would be offending the great God Sartorius. And I said, well, I don't believe in God. And he said, well, you'd be offending me. And I said, well, you're not going to be wearing it or even be around when I'm wearing it. So anyway, in the end he conceded and. But what. The point being that you don't want. Most tailors have an idea about a suit, but a good tailor tries to create what you tell him you want. So why don't you do some research and look at suits, get some pictures, make some decisions. You might want two vents. And just because it's over between you and I needn't deter you because we're probably almost certainly never going to meet. And you might not want to turn up because you sound like a younger man and that's sometimes scary for younger men. I don't think a trouser is resolved without a turn up. I think it's just unfinished. And there may be other things that you would prefer to have, but don't let them. I was once a prize. I didn't know I was a prize in a competition, but I was a prize. And I found out because I got on the plane and for once on the plane I read the In Flight magazine, which I've never read before. I must have forgotten my book or something. And I opened it up and I was in there as a prize for a competition. And the prize was a suit fitting with me at a particularly famous tailor's, you know, and this young man who I had to accompany to the fitting had never had a suit before. And the people that were administering the fitting started to tell him kind of what he. What he wanted. And I kept trying to say, is that what you want? But he hadn't done any research and he didn't know about suits. He probably, unless he'd won this competition, he probably would never have had a suit. So he didn't have any ideas of his own. And the risk is you end up wearing somebody else's suit, as it were. So I suggest you make those decisions before you get to the tailor and don't go anywhere famous. In other words, expensive, where they put, you know, £1,000 on for the postcode. And remember that reputations are almost always unreliable. Any decent tailor will make you a suit if you know what you want. So good luck out there. Now it's time for our occasional or maybe even regular feature. I'm with the band in which people send in the name of the band they used to be in long ago and the lyrics to their signature song. Our very first I'm with the band contribution comes from Sian. Sian is from Ottawa, Canada. I love it when we get messages from a really long way away. And the band she was in in 1979, they were called the Granola Girls. And the song, their signature song was we're the Granola Girls. Which is great because you may remember that I was in a band called the Love Ponies. And our signature song Was, hey, hey, we're the ponies. So, you know, we're already on a roll. And Sian says, not too original, but it was everybody guess it was ironic. And the lyric is, we love our Hennard hair, comma. We wear dash kitten heels everywhere Hippies are gone exclamation. And we don't care, exclamation mark. It's a fabulous lyric. We're the granola girls Shouted, it says in brackets. It's a really, really, really, really groovy lyric. I love it. I wish I could hear it. This was our one hit wonder, says sean in grade 12. It reminds me of champion Jack Dupree. Champion Jack Dupree was black American blues piano player, singer, and he moved, I believe, to Huddersfield and he wrote a song which I think I'm the only person in the world who knows about. And it's called I Wanna Be a Hippie But My Hair Won't Grow too Long. And it goes, I wanna be a hippie but my hair won't grow too long. But I love the way the hippie carry on. And I always think I'm probably the only person who knows this song, but thank you, Sian. That was great. That's a really great way to start the I'm with the band feature. We love our Hennard hair We wear kitten heels everywhere Hippies are gone and we don't care we're the granola girls. I'd love to know if there are any other lyrics or did you just do that lyric over and over and over again, which is a time on a tradition, as in I'm big in Japan. There was a band called I'm Big in Japan. And they're signature song, which might have been their only song, was I'm big in Japan I'm big in Japan I'm big in Japan. Which reminds me of Lionel Richie. All night long all night long all night long all night long all night long all night long all night long all night long all night long all night long all night long all night long all night long all night long, all night long. I used to read it to Imelda Staunton in makeup, as I used to read it as a sort of poem. And she'd say, do Lionel. And I'd go, all night long, all night long. You know, like it was a serious poem. Nothing wrong with the song. Don't get me wrong, love a bit of Lionel. And now this week's playlist, which is called Orchestrated Love Swing and it features a band called the Jack Moves and they obviously appreciate Lionel Richie because they've written a whole song about him and about his song all night long and it's called Lionel Richie. And from the new album by the fun loving Criminals, a song I like called Lovers Rock. And then from the one and only, the great Chaka Khan, what you're gonna do for me, which is a killer track. And then from the sadly and most lamented Angie Stone, who passed away last year, a song called all I'm missing, which is beautiful. And then from Ray Khalil, a song I like called is it worth it? And then another song from a young R B singer, Sy Smith. Sy Smith doing why do you keep calling me? And I hope those songs all have a some kind of rhythmic connection. It's time now to turn to the banned word list. These are words sent in by listeners which they want removed from the English language. Nibbles. I think nibbles should go. I think we should clean up the English language. It's that, as I've mentioned before, that patronizing thing of talking to children as if they need the language. I don't know. Cutified Nibbles is out. Bicky, give me a break. I think we all agree, don't we? One word that I'd really like to get rid of, which is a word that I come across a great deal and is used to describe me on occasion, is, and I remember, I think, when the word meant small. Now it's mutated in the modern world to mean somebody who's looking smart. And the word is dapper. And I'm often accused or complimented by the word dapper, but it always makes me kind of squirm a bit. This episode's book is Harlem Shuffle by Colson Whitehead. The New York Times describes it as a rich, wild book. It's about Harlem in the 1960s and about a man who owns a furniture store. And it's a kind of thriller. I'll just read you a section just to. Just to get you excited. At 3:32pm, two white men strolled up to the front door. Customers turned around on seeing the closed sign, but these two cupped their eyes and pressed their faces to the glass to see inside. They were clean cut young men in gas company uniforms that were not theirs. They weren't meatheads like a lot of muscle panting after a few punches. These dudes were fit and clean like astronauts that new generation half his age. Pepper grabbed a spot in his belly where the knife had gone deep. It already hurt from the fighting he was going to do. They split up one astronaut, the redhead walked to the corner and looked up morningside to the side door of the office. The blonde astronaut walked the other way to the wall between the store and the bar next door. They returned to the front door, conferred and left. Five minutes later they were back. The red headed astronaut bent down to pick or pop the lock on the grate and rolled it up while the other pretended to consult a clipbo on a job wearing the clothes of a waiter or porter. Gave pepper free passage among white people. Same way a white man in an official looking uniform in a negro neighborhood can get into a lot of places, no sweat. A CoP uniform sends one message, a utility man's another, long as they're not there to turn off the electricity. The red headed astronaut picked the front door without a fuss and his companion wheeled a metallic box over the threshold. Acetylene torch most likely. So that's about the size of it for this episode. Thank you for all questions. I hope you've enjoyed wasting some time. I hope we have successfully helped you take a break, because that's our mission. Please, if you feel inspired, send me some questions via Instagram. Ill Advised by Bill Nye. And remember, if you had a teenage band with an interesting name and you wrote songs and you can remember the lyrics to your signature song, please do send them in to the I'm with the Band feature. So I'll see you next time. And in the meantime, stay loose. Ill Advised by Bill Nye was produced by Alice Williams and Chiara Gregori. The assistant producer was Angelique Somas, pronounced Somas, and is an Ipod Studios production. And yes, I would like to add myself as an executive producer. Only I'm not Bill Nye is. So there you go. ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. What if you laughed all through your commute? Or if you heard the funniest story while at the gym? Well, now you can I'm Jameela Jamil and guests on my new podcast, Wrong Turns share their most mortifying and hilarious disaster stories. I'm talking people like Mae Martin, Bob the Drag Queen, Katherine Ryan, Jake Johnson, Margaret Cho, Simon Pegg, Penn Badgley, and so many more. So listen wherever you get your podcast. Wrong Terms Where Dignity Goes to Die ACAST helps creators launch, grow and monetize their podcasts everywhere.