← In Totality with Megan Ashley
In Totality with Megan Ashley
EP 111: His Steadfast Love Never Fails: Waiting Without Anxiety
00:57:03
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- [00:00]
Mackenzie
My name is Mackenzie and I started a GoFundMe for the adoptive mother of a nonverbal autistic child. The mother had lost her job because she wasn't able to find adequate care for this autistic child. So she really needed some help with living expenses, paying some back bills. So I launched a GoFundMe to help support them during this crisis, and we raised about $10,000 within just a couple of months. I think that the surprising thing was by telling a clear story and just like really being very clear about what we needed, we had some really generous donations from people who were really moved by the situation that this family was struggling with.
- [00:47]
Megan Ashley
GoFundMe is the world's number one fundraising platform, trusted by over 200 million people. Start your GoFundMe today at gofundme.com that's gofundme.com gofundme.com this podcast is supported by GoFundMe.
- [01:00]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
What's up, family? Before we jump into today's episode, I want to share something close to my heart. Our In Totality Patreon community, the Village. If you ever listen to the podcast and you thought, wow, I really wish there was more. This is exactly why I created this space. You'll receive early access to every episode, so while others are hearing it for the first time, you'll already be watching it and soaking it in.
- [01:23]
Megan Ashley
But it's not just that.
- [01:25]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
You'll also get access to the In Totality docu series, which is like my vlog, which shows what I do when
- [01:31]
Megan Ashley
I'm not on the podcast.
- [01:32]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
And that's not it. You'll also be the first to know about merch drops, events and opportunities to
- [01:38]
Megan Ashley
connect in real life.
- [01:39]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
One of my favorite parts is our Bible study and book clubs where we're walking through scripture together and encouraging one another in the faith. On Patreon, we are building a community that truly desires a relationship with the Lord, pursues truth, and supports one another. And I would love for you to be a part of that. So if you want more, come join the Village on Patreon. The link is in the description and
- [02:02]
Megan Ashley
I can't wait to see you there. I did feel nudged by the Holy Spirit to really lean into what does it mean to just rest and abide in God's love? All that we can do when it comes to God's steadfast and faithful love is receive it, rest in it, and respond to it. That's all we can do. Remember who it is that you're waiting on. You're waiting on a steadfast, faithful, merciful, perfect God who keeps his promises. I don't even be keeping my promises. How dare I when you're in Christ, God has bound himself to you. So just be patient and remember who it is that you're waiting on. I know he will come through for me.
- [02:43]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
And even if he don't save us
- [02:44]
Megan Ashley
from the fire, don't come through.
- [02:46]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
I'm not bowing.
- [02:47]
Megan Ashley
I bet I won't bow to you. If you're going through an uncertain time, the enemy can't wait to bing back. Boom. Your thoughts.
- [02:55]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
Stepping out on faith without actually having faith is foolish.
- [02:59]
Megan Ashley
Yeah, you're just moving, but you're not progressing. And there's a difference. What's up, you guys? Welcome back to another episode of In Totality. I'm your host, Megan Ashley, here again with the team. So excited to be here. I hope you guys have had a wonderful weekend. And start of the week. I have had a. You know, what is this April? I'm still recovering from March. I will be recovering from March for some time. I'm just gonna be honest with y', all, but I did wanna. I had a really good Bible study last night with the village community, and we've been going through the book Beloved by Francis Chan. And I know you guys are probably like, it is April. Y' all started that in January. There is six chapters of that book, and it is a very easy read. How are y'? All? How are y' all still there? I don't know. The Lord has just been letting us take our time. We just been pacing ourselves through this book. I wasn't in a rush for it. I did feel nudged by the Holy Spirit to really lean into what it means to be loved by God. Right Again. I think I talked a lot in previous episodes and previous seasons of In Totality about like, we gotta love God. We gotta love him. We gotta love Him. We gotta be serious about loving Him. Da, da, da, da. And it's like, that is true, but we also have to pause and remember how that love first is generated, and it's him loving us first. And so I really have been putting an emphasis on the Lord has been putting emphasis on my heart, and then I have been encouraging the village community to just, what does it mean to just rest and abide in God' love. And so as we've been going through this book, y', all, we're in. We are in April. And by the time this podcast comes out, I pray to God we on chapter three. I don't know if we will be, but that's the pace at which we're going. We've just been taking our time. And so the other night when we did Bible study, we were concluding chapter, Chapter two in dang. And there's a. There's a paragraph in here that I wanted to read because this is kind of what started me on this study, about God's steadfast love. And so this is in the book, but love, Francis Chan says. He says, what I do know is that there is a form of heresy in preaching certain attributes of God to the. To the neglect of others. I also know that I rarely, if ever, meditate on the following verses to my detriment. You may be the type that meditates on these verses to the. To the neglect of others. This book was written primarily for those who tend to focus on their own failures rather than his mercy, grace, and love. And so the next couple pages, Francis Chang gives a significant amount of Scripture. It's like two pages, three pages of Scriptures to just meditate on that focus primarily on God's goodness and his grace and his mercy. And the scripture that stuck out to me, that really captured my attention, that I really wanted to meditate on was Lamentations 321 through 26. And I'll read it. But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope. The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases. His mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning. Great is your faithfulness. The Lord is my portion, says my soul. Therefore I will hope in him. The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him. It is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord. And that was the scripture. So I'm reading through this book, I'm reading through all these Scriptures, and that was the one that just kind of kept sticking out to me. And it was the steadfast love of the Lord. And I was like, dang, like, what does steadfast mean? Like, I really want to know. And I told y', all, I'm trying to learn Hebrew and Greek, and I'm not trying to learn Aramaic. I'm just going to be honest with you. It seems like a little too hard. But I want to know the, the. The Hebrew words and the Greek words. I think it brings more depth and context to Scripture as we read it. And so as I was looking at what steadfast love or faithful love means, that word in the Hebrew is translated as he be easy. Okay, all you theologians, ease up because I don't know if I'm saying it a hundred percent correct, but I think it's hesed. And as I was looking through that word, I was like, oh man. Like, this is a, this is an intense love. This is a covenantial love. It's a faithful love. It's a loyal love. It's deeper than just like agape. It's deeper than that. It's a, it's a more. It's a more intense word. It's full of mercy, right? And so I was taking the, the Bible study through what it means, like the word steadfast, what that means, scriptures that, that give context to God's steadfast love. And there's this scripture in Hebrews that really captured my attention and it took me down this whole process through Abraham. And so this scripture is Hebrews 6:13. And then we'll kind of flip through back and forth between HeBr6 and Genesis as we kind of talk through the story of Abraham and like God's promises to Abraham. But in Hebrews 6 it says, for when God made a promise to Abraham, since he had no greater to swear by, he swore by himself, I will indeed bless you, and I will greatly multiply you. And so after waiting patiently, Abraham obtained the promise. For people swear by something greater than themselves. And for them, a confirming oath ends every dispute. Because God wanted to show his unchangeable purpose, purpose even more clearly to the heirs of the promise, he guaranteed it with an oath. So through two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled for refuge might have strong encouragement to seize the hope set before us. We have this hope as an anchor for the soul. Firm and secure, it enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain. So this scripture, I was like, okay, like, what does that mean? Since he had no greater to swear by, he swore by himself. So then it takes me on this, this journey. And if you go through the story of Abraham, you see in Genesis 12 that this is kind of where the promise begins, right? We know that Abraham is just out here and then God just like talks to Abraham, like he initiates things with Abraham. And that is encouraging because Abraham didn't do anything to provoke God's initiation to him, right? Like God just initiate things. He. He comes after Abraham. Doesn't seem like Abraham is coming after God, right? God just comes after Abraham. That is encouraging. And all. Everything that I'm saying is, is setting up for us to really take inventory of who God is in his nature and his Character, right? So God initiates, that's the first thing. Abraham is doing nothing to earn this. He is simp. God just simply shows up to Abraham and speaks to him, right? It's unprompted, unmerited. He just does it. That should be good news. Okay. He makes a specific promise. He promises him land, he promises him descendants, and he promises a worldwide blessing through Abraham's life. That's a lot of promises. Like those are big, major promises for somebody who wasn't even checking for God like that, right? God initiates. God makes specific promises. And notice that in the promises that God makes to Abraham In Genesis 12, 1 through 3, there are no conditions attached to that. It's not I will if you. I will only if I will at the, you know, contingent upon you doing X, Y and Z. That is not a thing. He's just saying, I will, I will, I will, I will. He's making these promises to him, right? Then if we mosey on over to Genesis 15, right? God makes this official, right? By God, makes it official in Genesis 15, right? And this is an interesting story. I don't think I ever really like paid attention or thought through this. But we see the promises start in Genesis 12, and then 15, we see this covenant happen, right? And in that, Abraham is asking, asking the Lord, like, how will I know that you will actually do this, right? So the Lord tells him, you know, get this animal, get this animal, cut him in half. Lay one piece on opposite sides of each other. And then Abraham goes into a deep sleep, right? Then the Lord says to Abraham, but Abraham is sleep. And the Lord says to Abraham, know this for certain, your offsprings will be resident aliens. And he tells them all these things for 400 years. Years they'll be in a land that doesn't belong to them. He's done. He's saying all the stuff, right? But you will go to your father in peace and be buried. Like he's. He's giving him this whole map out about what his descendants, what will happen with his descendants, what will happen to him. But mind you, Abraham is sleep. And then in verse 17, it says, when the sun had set and it was dark, a smoking fire, pot and flaming torch appeared and passed between the divided animals. On that day, the Lord made a covenant with Abraham, saying, I will give this land to your offsprings. From the brook of. Of Egypt to the great river, the land of the Kenites. I'm not about to do that.
- [12:55]
Guest Speaker
Canaanites.
- [12:56]
Megan Ashley
Canaanites. The Kizzites, the Camonites, the Hittites. The like, he's all that, all the people, right? So God is giving, he's making a covenant with Abraham. And now, mind you, during this time when, when covenants were made, when animals were sacrificed, they would lay the one half of the animal on one side. They would lay the other half of the animal on the other side, right? And then both that were making the covenant, both parties would pass through these animals, right? And that was how, you know, the covenant was made. Basically saying that if either one of us break this covenant, this is our, this is the consequence. What happens to these animals will happen to us. That's what that was. That's how you made a covenant.
- [13:40]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
Right?
- [13:41]
Megan Ashley
But notice again, Abraham is sleep. So Abraham is not walking through the, the, the divided animals. He's not doing that. God is doing it basically saying, I, I will take on the consequences of this, of this covenant myself. I am going to fully fulfill this covenant. And I don't need Abraham. Like I don't even need Abraham's participation in this. And that to me is so encouraging that God is that serious about his covenant with us that it's not contingent upon even our participation in a way like he's. He's so secure of doing it on his own, right? So he's passing through these animals and making a covenant with himself. Abraham is in a deep sleep. Which means Abraham is completely passive in this. Completely passive in this covenant, right? God takes both. He takes both sides of the covenant obligations on himself. So even if Abraham fails, God bears the full consequences. But God also knows that he's God and that he can't fail and that he can't lie and that he can't change. So he can take on the full consequences and the full covenant of himself. Right? The promise doesn't depend on Abraham keeping his end of it. It's entirely God's faithfulness. Entirely. Right? So that's when the covenant is made. So the promise was given in Genesis 15. The covenant is made. I'm sorry, the promises was given in Genesis 12. The covenant is made in Genesis 15. But then you go to Genesis 22 and we know that God has promised Abraham descendants. And we know, right, that it took decades for Abraham to get Isaac. It took time, right? And we also know that Abraham was impatient with that. He was over here, Sarah's womb is closed and he over here, like, well, I got Hagar. I'm g. Go ahead. And I'm g. Go ahead and know Hagar and, and have a baby. And now we have Ishmael. And we see him trying to rush the promise and take matters into his own hands, right? So that's in between Genesis 15 and 22. Before Isaac is born, there's Ishmael, right? So we know. So we know that. That the. The covenant promise that God made couldn't be contingent upon Abraham's perfection or whatever because he. He. He messed up, right? He. He tried. He took matters into his own hands and had ishmael. In chapter 22, verses 1 through 18, this is where we have the sacrifice of Isaac. And so Abraham has waited all this time to. For God to fulfill the promise, to give him an heir.
- [16:27]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
And all the things.
- [16:28]
Megan Ashley
Now he has Isaac. And now God is like, hey, Amen, run that back. That promise that I gave you, I'm gonna need. I'm gonna need you to give it back. Imagine. Imagine. And if you have been walking with the Lord long enough, you know that this is something that he often requires. The thing that you love the most. He's always asking, are you willing to give it back? There's always some sort of test. Are you willing to give it back? Right? So this is where we see Hebrews 6 come in. Is that when. When. When Abraham is obedient to sacrifice the. The very thing that he waited so long for, the very thing that God promised. And he does that, right? Obviously the Lord, in His kindness and sovereignty, he sends a ram in the bush. And so Isaac doesn't have to be sacrificed and in God. And Abraham trusted God and it was accounted to him as righteousness, right? And then God says something very interesting that he did not. He has not said, by myself, I have sworn, I will surely bless you and multiply your offsprings. Now again, God has already made this promise in Genesis 12. And then he. He. He makes the Covenant in Genesis 15. But then we go to Genesis 22 and he swears. He. He. He makes an oath. He swears by Himself. This is completely unnecessary. It's completely unnecessary because God is God. So his word should have been enough. His promises should have been enough. His covenant should have been enough. But then he takes it a step further because He's God. And he always does the most for us, whether we decide to receive it or acknowledge it or not. He always does the most for us. And so he takes it a step further and he swears by Himself, he makes an oath. And why does God do that? Again, it feels completely unnecessary for him to do that. But he does this and he swears by Himself because, number one, there is no greater person to swear by because he's God. So there is no. There is nothing higher for him to swear by. He swears by himself, and he does that to remove every possibility for us to ever doubt him. He's eliminating every ounce of doubt that we can ever have. When God has given us a promise. He's saying, if. If my pursuit for you isn't enough and my promise to you isn't enough, and my covenant isn't enough, I'm gonna go a step further and I'm gonna swear an oath. I'm gonna swear by myself and give you an oath. And he's doing that to eliminate every ounce of doubt for us, every ounce of unbelief that we can have any ounce of. Oh, maybe he will, maybe he won't. I don't. Maybe. I don't know. It's taking time. So may. Maybe God has forgot about me. No, he's showing us clear as day that he's serious about his covenant to us. And not even just a serious about his covenant to us. He's serious about a covenant that he made with himself. And so when we look through Hebrews 16, and we kind of walk through it verse by verse, since there's no other great, there's no one greater to whom to swear. He swears by himself. God has nothing bigger than himself to swear by, so he swears by himself. There is nothing bigger than Christ. There's nothing bigger than God. Right. The promise is only as breakable as God himself is breakable. If God cannot lie and God is immutable, he cannot change. He's not altering himself, then that also applies to his promises, is if God has promised to never leave you or forsake you. If he promises that, and he also is God who cannot change, then he's not backing down from what he said, period. He's not breaking down what his covenant love is secure within his own nature of being. God's covenant love is secured in his nature of being. Again, if he cannot change, neither can his promises. All that we can do when it comes to God's steadfast and faithful love, and I was explaining this to the village community last night, all that we can do is receive it, rest in it, and respond to it. That's all we can do. You cannot earn it. You can't. You, you can do. You can do all you can to strive for it. It's a waste of time. All you can do is receive the love of God, receive all that he has for you, rest in it, be secure in it, place your identity in the fact that you are so loved by him, and then respond to it. And in that response, if you really allow what Romans 5 says for the love of God to be poured into your heart through the Holy Spirit, if you've really allowed that to happen, then your response is obedience. Your response is faithfulness. Your response is joyful obedience, willful obedience. Your response is to do all that he's commanded you to do because you've allowed the love of God to literally permeate every ounce of your heart. It is his love that transforms us and changes us. It's not you doing a bunch of works or you meeting a certain quota. That is what changes you. It's the love of God that changes you. This is not something that you can strive for. It's only something that you can receive, rest, and respond to. And this entire study about God, steadfast love has been really, really encouraging to me, especially in a time right now where I feel like so much feels uncertain, like I, I don't know about you, but there. I have talked to so many people in the last, I don't know, five weeks, I mean, it probably in the last month who have just been going through the most. They just been going through the most. God is moving things and changing things and allowing seasons to change. And there isn't a whole lot of certainty that people feel. They're like, I just don't. I don't know what God is doing.
- [23:15]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
Listen, getting paid twice a month doesn't mean money has to be scarce. And it can feel that way. Sometimes that feeling can make you do things that you probably don't need to do, like put something on a credit card or feel unsettled over the timing of something that is completely outside of your control. And that's such a common feeling that nobody really talks about. That's why I want to talk to you guys about Earn In. Earn in is a financial technology company, not a bank. And the concept is really simple. Earn in allows you to Access up to $150 of your pay each day and up to a thousand dollars between paychecks with no mandatory fees. Tips are completely optional. Standard transfers take up to one one to two business days, and if you need it faster, expedited transfers start at 3.99 and cap at 5.99. Five million people are already on it. And honestly, it's surprising that this didn't exist sooner. Download Earn in at the App Store or Google Play spelled earning money without the G type in in totality under podcast when you sign up, it'll really help the show again. Earn in is a financial technology company, not a bank. Access limits are based on your earnings and risk factors. All right, guys, back to the show.
- [24:30]
Megan Ashley
Even if we just look objectively, we just look at our world, it's. It feels chaotic. I don't know if we're in a war, if World War 3 is happening. We don't know what Trump is doing. The economy is shaky. I'm looking at interest rates for homes. I'm scared. Milk is 1599. Eggs is a trillion dollars. You know what I'm saying? Like inflation, it's just. Everything feels so chaotic. And, and, and then even just in. In your personal walk with the Lord, it's like, it's, It's. It feels hard. So many people are experiencing faithful fatigue. We. I mean, weary. Is. Is that anybody. Are you feeling that tension of like, I've. I'm being. I feel like I'm being faithful, but, man, I'm tired. I feel like I'm being obedient, but I'm tired. It just feels like it's one thing after another. Me and Jordan were having this con. We've been having this conversation for five weeks straight. Every week, it's been one thing, literally after another, one challenge after another, one suffering after another, one sorrow after another. And here's the thing. I've. I've been really thinking about this because God's steadfast love. God. That's all I've been thinking about. God's steadfast love. His steadfast love that. His love. It's a covenantal love. It's not a shaky love. It's not. It's not flaky. He's not. He's not petty with his love. Like, his love is secure. His love is secure. He loves us. He loves us. And I. And I'm repeating this because you have to anchor. You have to anchor yourself in that because although circumstances are going to change and a lot of times the circumstances will change, that don't feel good. What does remain is God's steadfast love. I know that he loves me. Regardless if he's allowing all the stuff or not, I know that he loves me. And this particular season, I don't know if it's just me, but it feels like this particular season is an intense pruning. Like, I feel like the Lord is cutting and, And. And he's, like, operating on me.
- [26:56]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
What's up, you guys? This episode is sponsored by Better Help. Listen, I want to take a moment and talk about something that doesn't always come get said out loud, But a lot of us are carrying it, and that's financial stress. And I'll be honest, this is something that I've had to navigate in my own life. There have been seasons where I was working, doing everything I knew to do, and still feeling the pressure of trying to make things stretch, trying to stay ahead, trying to figure it out without having a roadmap. And what I didn't realize at the time was how much that stress was affecting me, not just financially, but emotionally. Because financial stress doesn't change. Just sit in your bank account. It shows up in your thoughts, your sleep, your relationships. It can make you anxious and overwhelmed and even ashamed. And I think a lot of people quietly carry that weight, feeling like they're behind or like they've done something wrong. But struggling with money doesn't mean you failed. Sometimes it just means you need support, not just financially, but emotionally. And that's where therapy can really make the difference. Therapy isn't, isn't just about someone telling you how to manage your money. It's about helping you understand your relationship with money. It's about unpacking the stress, the fear, the pressure, and learning how to respond to those things in a healthier way. It gives you space to process and to carry so it doesn't continue to weigh on every area of your life. Betterhelp connects people with licensed therapists in the u. S. Who follow a strict professional code of conduct product. They also handle matching process for you through a short questionnaire that helps identify your needs and your preferences. With over 12 years of experience, they typically get it right the first time. But if it's not the right fit, you can switch to a different therapist from their recommendations. If you've been feeling overwhelmed, especially in this area, I just want to encourage you and remind you that you're not alone and that you don't have to carry it by yourself. When life feels overwhelming, therapy can really be a help. Sign up and get 10 off@betterhelp.com totality. That's BetterHelp. H-E-L-P.com totality. All right, guys, back to the conversation.
- [29:04]
Megan Ashley
And I was thinking about that. I was like, you know, and y' all can actually. We can talk through this because I actually don't know because I was thinking about this in the shower. I was like, if you were to have surgery, right? Like say you were going to have surgery and they do not give you anesthesia. Like, if you don't Go under anesthesia, you still can survive that surgery. Right? Like, you won't die. You would just feel. Because the anesthesia is just to put you in a twilight so that you don't feel what's actually happening to you. Right. Isn't that what that is?
- [29:38]
Guest Speaker
I think so.
- [29:39]
I. I don't.
- [29:40]
I actually. It's not until this moment, though, because I literally.
- [29:42]
Megan Ashley
That dawned on me today. I was like, I don't think the anesthesia is keeping you alive. I think it's just keeping you in a state that you don't feel what' actually happening to you.
- [29:50]
Guest Speaker
It might be, like, a chemical, in a sense. Your. Your body, if you can't feel it, your body isn't putting itself into shock to actually shut down sooner. Like, your body isn't trying to prepare for life.
- [30:01]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
Yeah.
- [30:01]
Megan Ashley
Your body isn't responding to it because it's just, like, relaxing to the circumstances. But I was also just thinking about the. The idea of, like, if God is the surgeon, right, and he's doing the cutting, right. The surgery isn't to kill you. The surgery is actually to repair you. You know what I'm saying? Like, the surgery is actually to repair something or to mend something or to fix something or to get something out of you that doesn't need to be there.
- [30:30]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
Right.
- [30:30]
Megan Ashley
Like, but it's still. I'm pretty sure if you're not under anesthesia, right, it's gonna feel like you're dying. And I was thinking about this because the. The circumstances of life has just been crazy in the last week, and I'm just, like, rooting yourself in God's steadfast love. Give understanding to know that the Lord is not allowing suffering and pain and trials and sorrows to destroy you, but he does leverage it to destroy what is not of him in you. And e. And so destruction still feels like destruction, regardless if the destruction is actually for your good or not. It still hurts. It still hurts. It still doesn't feel good. But it does help you. When you are secure and rooted in the fact that God's love is. Is steadfast and he loves you, then it does kind of help reorient your thinking. And, like, okay, this is painful, but it's not killing me. Yeah, it's painful, but it's not come to destroy me.
- [31:30]
Guest Speaker
Yeah. It even makes me think of, like, how you would hear parents say to their kids, like, I'm doing this, like, to help. I mean, even the scripture as well. Like, the Lord is here to help us and not harm us.
- [31:42]
Megan Ashley
Yeah.
- [31:42]
Guest Speaker
Like parents may often say, I mean, this is a little toxic, but you know, back in the day when you would get a B in, it would be like, yeah, like, I'm doing this
- [31:53]
Megan Ashley
because I love you.
- [31:54]
Guest Speaker
Yeah.
- [31:54]
Megan Ashley
I mean, in this scripture, God disciplines the one that he loves. Right? That's scripture. And so it. It. It can feel like I. I just. I want. I want to empathize because it can. It can still hurt. You know what I'm saying? And I don't. And I don't even think the Lord is trying to ignore that hurt. He knows it. Like, yeah, it hurts. It hurts, but it is not come to destroy you. And so if you're in a season right now where it feels like the Lord is pruning me, he's changing me, maybe even removing me from situations and relationships and separations and maybe times of isolation and maybe times of wilderness or just circumstances are changing and it feels painful. But because I know that God's steadfast love endures forever, I know that this did not come to destroy me. It doesn't destroy you.
- [32:47]
Guest Speaker
The scripture, when he says, like, just as a father chastises his son.
- [32:53]
Megan Ashley
Yeah.
- [32:54]
Guest Speaker
How much more does the Lord love us?
- [32:56]
Megan Ashley
Yeah.
- [32:57]
Guest Speaker
You know, to chastise us in that same way.
- [32:59]
Megan Ashley
And sometimes it is punishment, right? Like, sometimes we can be disobedient. And, like, the Lord disciplines the one he loves. Right. So sometimes it's like, yeah, maybe we put ourselves in a position to be. Be disciplined, and that doesn't feel good. But then we also have context of, like, Job, who was a righteous man who didn't necessarily do anything wrong, even though it kind of revealed a lot of pride and. And unbelief that that Job might have had in the Lord. But Job didn't. Was now here wiling and doing wrong. Like, doing something wrong. God. God actually is the one. Job doesn't know this. I mean, he knows now, but he didn't know then, Right. He didn't know that it was actually the Lord that was like, have you considered Job?
- [33:38]
Guest Speaker
Job, Would it be safe to say, because that's the season that I'm finding myself in is knowing what's the enemy and what is the Lord actually leveraging? Because it's like, yeah, being a Christian and doing this walk, like, our walk is guaranteed struggles and trials. Like, that's literally like, in a sense, the whole point. But there also is an enemy that's actually trying to tear us down and make us step out of alignment and doubt the Lord. So it's like, are they always, yes, they're always after us, I guess. So in any situation where you don't know if it's a trial or if this is the enemy, like consider both.
- [34:14]
Megan Ashley
I don't know initially if it, if it matters to know, you know what I'm saying? Because again, when I look at Job, I don't think he had any context to know was this Satan or was this God? And we see it was actually God is the one that was like, obviously Satan was looking to and fro, trying to look at some, find somebody, you know, but God is the one like, hey, have you considered Job? So I don't know if the, if it, if it always necessarily. I want to be mindful because we, we, we want to be mindful of the schemes of the enemy. I think we want to be mindful of that so that. And know how to fight off what he does and in his. And his lies and his. And his tactics and all the things. But I think ultimately, regardless, God allowed it. It. Whether God initiated it, you know what I'm saying? Or, or whether the Lord sent it or Satan is attacking it. At the end of the day, it can't go past the sovereignty of God. Right? So it's like if God allowed it, it's on me now to decide who I'm going to allow to leverage this. So what if this trial has come? Who am I going to allow to leverage it? Am I going to allow Satan to leverage it it?
- [35:29]
Guest Speaker
And, and what do you mean by
- [35:30]
Megan Ashley
that when I say leverage it? I mean who am I leaning into? Am I leaning into the pain of it and being like God has left me, God has forsaken me. He doesn't love me, he's trying to destroy me. He's just punishing me. He doesn't like me. Am I leaning into the lies of the enemy? And I'm, and I'm. Now I'm deciding I'm going to not lean into the Lord. I'm not going to go to church anymore. I'm not going to pray anymore. I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna succumb to the pain. I'm just gonna succumb to the frustration. I'm just, you know what? I'm tired of praying because every time I pray, nothing changes. I don't even know if God is hearing me. That is allowing the enemy to leverage it. I'm going through this grief. I'm just going, the Lord did this and I'm. Now I'm mad at God or am I going to Allow the Lord to leverage this opportunity by leaning into my spiritual disciplines, by leaning into the Lord, by praying, by having more intimacy with him, even if all I can do is lament. Yeah, but lamenting is prayers directed towards the Lord. So who am I going to allow to get the glory in this? Am I going to allow Satan to get the glory in it? Or am I going to allow the Lord to get to. I don't care who sent it. You know what I'm saying? Like, I'm at the end of the day, whatever the circumstances are. My. My goal and my aim as a Christian. Because again, what did we come to the faith for? To get God. I'm going to lean into him and I'm going to say, lord, I don't know why this trial has come. I don't know why this hurts as much. I don't know why this is so painful. I don't know why you're requiring me to give this up after you promised it to me. I don't know why you're asking me to lay this down. I don't know why you're telling me to. Whatever. I don't know why. I don't know why everything is so painful. I don't know why all this friction is happening in my relationships. I don't know why that job opportunity didn't work out. I don't know why you didn't give me the marriage or why you didn't give me the children. I don't know why. But what I do know is, is that your love is steadfast. What I do know, though, is that your love endures forever. I do know that. I do know that you love me. And so whatever you're allowing it is for my good and for your glory. And so if I don't know anything, I do know that. And I'm going to lean into that, that I'm going to allow you to leverage this pain for your glory, period. I don't. We may not have all the answers. You may. And, and, and here's the thing. Job never got it. We. Job don't know until. I hope he know now. I mean, I. I think he. In glory. Yeah. I think he knows what's in the book. You know what I'm saying? But I'm saying Job didn't get that answer. God did not say when. When after Nahum, you know, gives his final argument. And then here comes God responding to Job. God doesn't come responding to Job is like, hey, man, listen, I know this was hard. You did A really good job. See, what had happened was Satan was, you know, up here really trying to look for somebody to destroy. And I was like, hey, my man Job, he's a really righteous man. I think he can handle it. Just don't take his life. I was with you the whole time, bro.
- [38:51]
Guest Speaker
Imagine hearing that. I would have been like, you know what I'm saying?
- [38:54]
Megan Ashley
God, don't give him none of that. Actually, God go in on Job, where were you when I created the heavens and the earth? Where were you when I created this creation and that and this and this? And God goes in on him for sure.
- [39:07]
Guest Speaker
Hush mode.
- [39:08]
Megan Ashley
Like, do you know what I'm saying? God gives him zero context to what was actually going on. And so we have to look at that in the same way. And being like, okay, yeah, like. Like, I may not get any of the answers. I may not never know why all the things that you. I don't know. I just know that you're sovereign, and I just know that you're good and that if you allowed it, that it is for your glory. And ultimately, if I am a Christian, ultimately, if I have come to the faith, then I am always pursuing your glory and not my own. It's your glory over my comfort. Comfort. It's your glory over my ideas. It's your glory over what I want. It's always your glory. And so I'm going to sit in this. I'm not going to shy away from the pain of it. I'm going to be honest. But I'm going to allow you to leverage this. I'm going to allow you to work through my life in this. What is that Scripture? Jay Presser. Suffering produces James 1, 2, 4. I know you knew it. And not only that, but we rejoice in our afflictions because we know that our afflictions produces endurance. Endurance produces proven character, and proven character produces hope. This hope does not disappoint us because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit. The thing is, is that the afflictions produce what? Endurance. Endurance produces what? Character. Character is not something that happens like that, that your character is developed. So that means it takes time.
- [40:44]
Guest Speaker
Sanctification that.
- [40:46]
Megan Ashley
Yeah, it's sanctification. I think. I think that when we endure stuff, we just want the testimony of it quickly. I just want to get to the testimony. I just want it to be over. I don't. I don't want to be. I. And I am probably one of the most impatient people. I don't want to Go through it. I promise you, whatever the lesson is, you got it? I promise you. You for sure you got it. I won't do it again or whatever. I. Okay, but that's not what actually produces character. It takes like they that wait on the Lord shall renew their strength. Waiting on the Lord is what produces the character. Even thinking about Abraham, Abraham gets the promise in. In. In. In Genesis 12. And we don't see the. The. The fruit of that until well into Genesis 22. Do you understand what I'm saying? Decades he waited on the Lord. But the thing is with us is. Is as humans, we like to project our humanity on God. And because we have not had positive outcomes in waiting for people in our lives, we think that God is going to do us the way our daddy did, Mama did us, or the way that person did us. But remember who it is that you're waiting on. You're waiting on a steadfast, faithful, merciful, loving, immutable, unchangeable, perfect, strong, powerful, sovereign God. You're not waiting on just anyone. You're waiting on him who keeps his promises, whose love endures.
- [42:30]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
He keeps his promises.
- [42:31]
Megan Ashley
He keeps it.
- [42:33]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
Yeah, I have.
- [42:33]
Megan Ashley
I don't even be keeping my promises. How dare I. He keeps them. He's bound to them. He. You. You understand that when. That when you're in Christ, God has bound himself to you. He has bound his promises to you. He's not going to break it. So just be patient and remember who it is that you're waiting on. I am waiting on a perfect, righteous, sovereign, holy, mighty, strong, mighty God. That is who I'm waiting on. And so if it takes me. If it takes me 10 years, I'll wait 10 years. If it takes me into eternity, then. Then fine. But I do know that he will fulfill his promise. Whether I see the. The full fruit of that on this earth or I see it in eternity, either way, I know he will come through for me. Me. And you gotta have that type of. Like Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego is like, listen, I'm going through this.
- [43:36]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
And even if he don't save us
- [43:38]
Megan Ashley
from the fire, don't come through.
- [43:40]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
I'm not bowing.
- [43:40]
Megan Ashley
I won't bow to you. And you gotta have that type of. You gotta have that type of energy. When all. When the raging storms are happening in your life. If this storm take me out, then it take me out and it gets me, then I'm with Him. Him. But either way, I'm not bowing to anxiety. I'm not bowing to fear. I'm not bowing to suicide. I'm not bowing. I'm not bowing to whatever the enemy is tempting me to bow at. What I am going to do is stand firm. And stand firm in the promises of God and what he has promised me and who he is. And what is so miraculous about it is that I don't have to have confidence in myself. Because if I try to have confidence in myself, guess what? Listen. On bended knee, you hear me? I'm bowing.
- [44:30]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
Yeah. That weapon might just prosper.
- [44:31]
Megan Ashley
Oh, that weapon gonna prosper. Cause guess who produced it? Me. But if. If my confidence and assurance is fully rooted in the attributes and the character of God, who is unchangeable, then it's like, listen, even if it feels like this storm is gonna take me out, I'm not. I'm not changing who it is is that I'm serving and who it is that I'm standing for and who it is who I'm faithful to because he's faithful to me. And this is the thing. This is why the love of God, the steadfast love of God has got to surpass our. Our. Our. Our. Our head knowledge. It has to surpass that. This has to be a knowing. You have to allow God's love to be poured into your heart so that you have a history with you, with him, yourself, self. It's not just that. I've seen him be faithful to my mother and I've seen him be faithful to my pastor, and I've seen him be faithful to my aunts and this person and that person. I have personally experienced God's faithfulness in my own life. I've. I. I have a history with his steadfast love. Personally. This is beyond what I have observed outwardly. This is even beyond what I've observed in the scriptures. I have. I have experienced this myself. My experience aligns with also the history that we have in the scriptures. But my. I have a personal history with his steadfast love. I've personally seen how he's renewed my mind. I've personally experienced how when there have been trials in my life and I wanted to take my life, how that temptation has not come anymore. That wasn't a power that I produced. That was a power that God did. Did. I've seen it. I've seen how I used to respond this way, but I don't respond that way anymore. I've seen how when trials came, I used to run away from God. Now I'm running into him as a strong refuge and As a, as a strong tower. I, I, I've seen it. And so the next time the storm comes, because guess what? In this life, you will face many trials that's promised. I have a history. And if he did it, then he'll do it again. If he has kept me thus far, why would he not continue to keep me? If I have learned anything in this season is the power of the keeping God that it is that I serve. He is a keeper. His love is a refuge. And so this is me pleading with you to run into his love. Let his love be your refuge, his steadfast, faithful love. Run into it and let it comfort you. Let it transform you. Let it change you. Let it protect you. Don't run from him. Run into him. He loves you. And if you haven't heard it, let me tell you again. He loves you. He loves you. He loves you. His steadfast love endures forever. His steadfast love endures forever. And if that's the only thing that you can say in the middle of this trial, just keep saying that. I don't know when my next paycheck comes, but his steadfast love endures forever. I don't know when this relationship will be mended, but his steadfast love endures forever. I don't know when that circumstance will be fixed, but his steadfast love endures forever. He is a good God, and he keeps his word. And don't let them circumstances punk you and put you up against the rope and let it beat you up. Up. Stand firm in knowing that you serve a God who loves you, who loves you, who conquered death, hell in the grave, who is resurrected and who's coming back. That is why we can have hope. This steadfast love is not something to take lightly. It's this steadfast love is something to take serious. This is serious. He's serious about his love for you. Again with Abraham. He's serious about his word. He's serious about his promise. He's serious about his covenant. And he goes so far to make an oath to himself. That's how serious he is. He wants you to know that you can trust him, that you serve a God that is trustworthy. And so I don't know what this season, because I feel like everybody's going through it in one way or another. He, Everybody is going through it. Me and Jordan have had, have had more honest and raw conversations in the last four weeks than I don't, I mean, and she's been honest. Like, I'm tired Like, I. And most times the only thing that I can encourage her with is like, listen, bro, like, I don't know. I don't know why the Lord is allowing all this, but I do know he loves you.
- [49:30]
Guest Speaker
And why does it seem like you're obedient and leaning in? It really does seem like that makes everything worse.
- [49:38]
Megan Ashley
Yeah, it feels like it intensifies it.
- [49:40]
Guest Speaker
Yes. When you're pressing in, when you're being obedient, that's when more trials come. And it just, it is just so. It's been mind boggling me for a minute.
- [49:50]
Megan Ashley
It's that scripture. One, there's two scriptures. But the one that kept coming up for me was when. When. When Jesus says, Peter, he's talking to Peter and he's like, satan has asked to sift you like wheat. But I have prayed for you that your faith would not fail. And when you return, strengthen your brothers. That scripture, it's the when for me, it's the when you return. It is not. It ain't even the when before you even get to the when you return, but I have prayed for you. You. Like we have our high priest who is interceding on our behalf, praying for us that our faith would not fail. And it almost is like, the more faithful you are, the more Satan is trying to sift you. You have to have that awareness in your mind and in your heart. Like, I, I know that, okay, the more faithful I am, the more the enemy is probably going to try to sift me. But I also know that I have a high priest who is sitting at the right hand of, of the Father, interceding on my behalf, who will not allow my faith to fail. I am not the founder nor the perfecter of my faith. I'm not. So I don't even have to worry about that. I just have to remain faithful and let the Lord do like the Lord is sustaining my faithfulness. I'm not even sustaining that he's doing it. And when I come out of this trial and when I come out of this season, because again, this too shall pass. Just like the good times come and they pass, so will the hard times. And yes, there might be another trial waiting for you, but there are some, some relief that happens in between. And when this pass, I'm going to take all that I, that the Lord has produced in me and I'm going to use that for his glory and strengthen other people. That's what I'm gonna do. The only reason why I have been able to be encouraging and I pray That I have been for Jordan during this time because it's been hard for both of us, is because I. I have been strengthened by the Lord. I. I've. I've had a history of what he's done for me, and I just know. I. I'm like, I just know he's good. I've been through too much. Y'. All. Y' all seen it. It's documented it.
- [52:12]
Guest Speaker
Yeah, it's definitely good. I feel like with me and you, I'm not necessarily Job's friends, but there have been. This season has been like, what did you do?
- [52:24]
Megan Ashley
I'm crying.
- [52:26]
Guest Speaker
You truly come back. And, like. And it's like that. Not. That's the name of the game. But, yeah, like, the Lord. Like, the Lord is kind and he's keeping me.
- [52:36]
Megan Ashley
And.
- [52:36]
Guest Speaker
And yeah, like, now faith is like, you flip my doubt by how the Lord has strengthened you for sure. And it's just like, okay, well, if the one that's actually going through it not as pressed, then this is like, oh, okay. Like, I'm actually seeing the work of the Lord in your life, which should encourage me to. Also, when you return, you can also strengthen your brothers because you were just strengthened by someone that just returned.
- [53:04]
Megan Ashley
100%. 100%. We were talking about this the other day. We were talking about James. Why, you know, James be hiding. James tucked up in there. I mean, you go from Hebrews to Peter. I'm like, where is James, bro? I be flipping trying to find James. But I was. I was sharing this with Jordan. James, too. Consider it joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you experience various trials, because you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let the endurance have its full effect so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing. You gotta hold onto that, like, and then even just keep going. Now, if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives it generously and ungrudgingly, and it will be given to him. But let him ask it in faith without doubting. For the doubter is like the surging sea driven and tossed by the wind. The person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord and be being doubt, double minded and unstable in all his ways. It's like, endure. And know that during your endurance that God is producing something in you and that the full effect of that endurance will take place. But just endure. Just endure. I know sometimes that can sound crazy because it's like, okay, so just get beat up. I'm not saying get beat up and let the enemy beat you up. I'm not saying being a punching bag. I'm saying endure. Endure doesn't mean passively sit around and do nothing. Endure means be faithful. Continue to pray, continue to go to church. Continue to lean into your community. Continue to do all those things. Continue to fast, Continue to rejoice. Don't forget that. That's a huge element, y'. All. We be thinking enduring is just lamenting the whole time. You gotta add in some rejoice in there. That's still a command. Rejoice. Right? And again, I say rejoice.
- [55:07]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
And it's not like laugh at pain. It's encouraging that being content.
- [55:13]
Megan Ashley
Yes.
- [55:14]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
In whatever your circumstances are. Wherever he has me, I'm content. I have enough because I have you.
- [55:20]
Megan Ashley
Because that's what I'm after. Do you know what I'm saying?
- [55:23]
Guest Speaker
That gaze and that glance.
- [55:24]
Megan Ashley
Yeah.
- [55:25]
Guest Speaker
Where's your gaze?
- [55:26]
Megan Ashley
Where is your gaze at? Because truly, if you have the Lord, then a hundred percent, you have all that you need. Need. And I'm not saying please don't be
- [55:35]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
one of them people.
- [55:36]
Megan Ashley
Like, I don't need people because I got the Lord. I'm not saying that. What I'm saying is ultimately, if you have the Lord, the Lord will provide all that you need. He will provide peace. That's one thing that I've been praying, and this is something I feel like everybody needs to be praying. If you are going through an uncertain season in a hard season, that the peace of God would guard your heart in your mind. Because if you. If you're going through an uncertain time, the enemy. The. The enemy can't wait to bing back. Boom. Your thoughts.
- [56:09]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
Give your faith the foo pops.
- [56:11]
Megan Ashley
I mean, he is. He is. He is ready. He is ready with a good combo. He is trying to take you out.
- [56:23]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
Because that joy that he's talking, that James is talking about is not a feeling. It's like a decision.
- [56:27]
Megan Ashley
A decision.
- [56:28]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
It's an attitude. Like, I'm deciding that there's joy to be found in this. Because even if that's, like you said, the knowledge that you love me, there's joy to be found there. Even in my affliction, even in this bill. I'm buying. Even with this eviction notice. You are a waymaker.
- [56:47]
Megan Ashley
Yeah. You're a provider, and that's who you are. So therefore, it won't change. You will provide all that I need, period. Like, that's not going to change. And so I. I just encourage everybody to just lean. Lean in and even be. Be really strategic. Ask the Lord for strategy. And also Be strategic in how you're praying. Like the Lord. Right here in James, it says, if you ask, if anyone lacks wisdom, let him ask, and God gives you it generously.
- [57:19]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
Not going to rebuke you for it.
- [57:20]
Megan Ashley
He's not going to rebuke you for asking for, for wisdom. So when, when times are uncertain, Lord, I don't know what you're doing, but give me the wisdom to endure. Give me the wisdom that I need to, to navigate through this season. And even when it talks about that person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. If you're asking and doubting, then you shouldn't expect anything. But if you actually know who it is, the one that you're praying to, if you actually know who it is, the one that you say that you serve when you ask, you actually should, should expect for him to act because he will. He may not do it in the timing that you want, but he will act, he will respond, he will fulfill. He will come through. He will. You can bank on that just as much as you can bank on him being God. God, yeah.
- [58:13]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
Stepping out on faith without actually having faith is foolish.
- [58:17]
Megan Ashley
Yeah, yeah.
- [58:19]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
It's just a step.
- [58:19]
Megan Ashley
At that point, you're just moving.
- [58:21]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
Yeah.
- [58:22]
Megan Ashley
But you're not progressing. And there's a difference. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I, I, I said all that to say we are all going through it. So if you are going through it, I pray that at bare minimum, you at least walk away from this episode being like, okay, at least I'm not by myself. At least I'm not alone. There's not something wrong. I don't want you to think something's wrong. You know what I'm saying? Pray, repent where there needs to be repentance. Right? Submit, surrender, all the things, but stand firm in the fact that you serve a God who is steadfast, faithful, merciful, kind, generous, giving, loving, and all of that. All of what he does, he does in abundance. He's always doing the most for you, whether you can perceive it or not. He's always doing the most for you when it comes to the Lord. Take inventory of your history with God. What does that history look like? Go back through your life and just take inventory of God's faithfulness and his steadfast love with, like, go think about your. Just take inventory of your life history and like, what is your history with God? What is your history with his steadfast love? Do you have a personal history with Him? And so, yeah, maybe just start there. But anyway, I pray that this episode was helpful. I pray that it, yeah, it comforts you in ways, even if it needs to convict you in ways. That's fine if that's where the Holy Spirit is leaning. But I just pray ultimately that it, it helps you lean closer into the Lord.
- [60:01]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
Hey, I thank you so much for being here with me on Into Tality this week. If this episode bless you or challenge you or even stirred up something in your spirit, go ahead and like this video. Drop a comment below and share with us what part of the conversation really stuck out the most. Share with someone who you think might benefit from watching this. It really helps the show.
- [60:22]
Megan Ashley
And listen, if you want more of In Totality on a weekly basis, then
- [60:27]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
join my Patreon community. You get early access to watch In Totality episodes, exclusive behind the scenes content and In Totality docu series which is like my vlog, first access to merch drops events, Bible studies where we're walking through the word together, book clubs and so much more. We're growing in our faith together and I would love for you to be
- [60:48]
Megan Ashley
a part of it.
- [60:49]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
If you haven't already, subscribe and tap the notification bell so that you never miss an episode. Thursdays. You'll find me right here on YouTube.
- [60:57]
Megan Ashley
YouTube in the live chat when the episode premieres.
- [61:00]
Podcast Host (In Totality)
I hope this message encouraged you today. I pray that you find a good godly community and a Bible based church where you're rooted in love and growing. Keep stepping into God's truth In Totality.
- [61:12]
Megan Ashley
I'll see you next time. Hi, I am Mandy Moore.
- [61:26]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
Sterling K. Brown.
- [61:27]
Megan Ashley
And I'm Chris Sullivan and we host
- [61:29]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
the podcast that Was Us now on Headgum.
- [61:32]
Megan Ashley
Each episode we're gonna go into a deep dive from our show. This is Us.
- [61:36]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
That's right.
- [61:37]
Megan Ashley
We're gonna go episode by episode. We're also gonna pepper in episodes with different guest stars and writers and casting directors.
- [61:45]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
Are we gonna cry? Yes, a little bit. Are we gonna laugh a lot?
- [61:49]
Megan Ashley
A whole lot.
- [61:50]
Guest Speaker (possibly Sterling K. Brown)
That's what I'm hoping. Man. Listen to that was us on your favorite podcast app or what? Watch full video episodes on YouTube or Spotify new episodes every Tuesday.