Gabby Dunn (25:31)
And go with it. They've never even heard of this. So you're telling me now you're going out of your way to the uppers. To the uppers. To the uppers. To the uppers. Look, we have a mayday Mayday. And you still. And you still are able to pump out that passport faster than you can say I'm a pervert. That's the real question, is how are they working so fast? That's the real question is, who squealed? Who's the squealer? Who is the narc? As the old true but trite saying, snitches get stitches. Mind your business. At the previous passport said female, look the other way, turn to blind eye. Have you never covered for a friend at 16 buying cigarettes at the gas station? No, sir, I swear. She has a good skin care regimen. She's 18. Have you never. Come on. Come on. Just put your head down and act like you never saw anything. Just make. Just make a duplicate. Hers was lost. It wasn't going in for any kind of a last name change. Any kind of a correction. And don't even get me started on the ones who want to change the last name. The institution of marriage. Yes, I believe. Yeah, you didn't think it was going to take that kind of a turn. But it did. But it did. Because it's all a distraction, as you know, because we're talking about this. Because look at me, I'm seeing red. Hunter Shaffer did not go through all of this for that. To be embarrassed at the airport. Oh, no, no, no. Embarrass the other one who hasn't cleaned under his fingernails in weeks. You're disgusting. Wash your hands. No, because it's a dis. It's a distraction, as we know from the real problem. That said, toddler is going to be a trillionaire. Yes. Yes. He's not even on solids. Before he will be the richest man in the world. You heard me. Of course. Re. Yes, yes. Cut government spending and reallocate it to the people who need it. Don't cut their spending. It doesn't even affect you. Just reallocate it. No, because I know, I know, I know they want the control. I know, I know we're living in a sick, sick, sick time. But just turn the other way. Is that too much to ask? And speaking of last names. Speaking of last names, this conversation is. Is solely for the gays because I know the straights are going to get their panties in a wad. And there's a couple lurking here and dare I say, their fingers on the trigger let up. You need to be an ally. And this is how you do it. Like, and subscribe and send it to your friends. And listen up. Gonna learn you one. But you can maybe fast forward like five minutes because I don't want to offend you. Yes, I do. Because they die for the last name change. Yes, yes, I need to take his last name. No, I need is mine. He has to pass on his lineage. It's so important to him. He thinks his grandk to give one flying fuck about him for playing an intramural drunk kick football league. This is his lasting imprint on the world. And he needs to have a baby with his last name. And my, my. My whole line of a family tree must be quickly forgotten about. Yes, yes, I need a new last name to the man who sniffs my father's underwear. But I cannot confront him because we as women are supposed to be passive and docile and amicable. Amiable. Because we as women are supposed to turn the other way when he kisses his mother on the mouth and then kisses my mother on the mouth. This is the man that you want to take his last name. All right, all right. Well, you sit on the phone with Social Security because you so desperately want a new email. I'd rather pluck out my mustache one fine baby hair by one fine baby hair, then change my email. What? Think about. Just think about it. That is so much work that you're willingly asking in. But you know what? Like I've said again and again, I support women so honestly, do whatever the fuck you want. It doesn't concern me. It doesn't concern me. And I don't you think I have one last fiber filled with energy to spare about your last name? I don't. I don't take that last name, Mrs. Dickel. That's who you want to be. That's who I want you to be. What am I supposed to say anyways? The institution of marriage. Sometimes I hear from lesbians, I don't believe in the institution of marriage. I don't quite even. I love being married. It makes me horny. It turns me on. It makes me feel safe. Oh, marriage is for the insecure, as they say. And I get the institution of marriage and the last name thing, obviously, I get. I get the church marriage rooted in the patriarchy. Women, women cannot have access to this high priesthood. Yes, I've been doing a lot of research on Mormonism. And sometimes I wonder, and sometimes I wonder, why don't oligarchs, why don't the fascists of our country, why aren't they Mormon? Because the Mormons do have a leg up. They all look the same with some kind of a mutated beach wave and a reinvented mixture of a soda that used to Be called something of a Sylvia Plath. You guys know what I mean? Do the math. Figure it the fuck out. You know, you wanted to talk about with. With your parents. With your parents because you're on a family vacation, which. A family vacation is a road trip to the KOA Mind you, which is free, and you're sleeping on the ground. Yeah, dad, sure, we took a family vacation. He says. Well, we used to drive up to the mountains all the time. My point. My point exactly. A family vacation, a relaxing time isn't coming head to head with a grizzly. Never have, thank God, and I never will. Anyways, on your family vacation. We're lower middle class. We're gonna have fine dining at the Taco Bell, please. Still one of my favorite restaurants to this day. And you're gonna make yourself a mix of the Pepsi and the orange Fanta and the Sprite and. What is that called? Like a Sylvia Pot. Anyways, the Mormons have reinvented this with their soda shops, the church marriage, the. The evangelical Christians. Aren't they all evangelical? I don't know. I'm not here to take heed. I'm here to talk. Shit. Leave me alone. Let me breathe. I get that. I get that we don't want the whole. The one man has to give me away to another man. I understand the patriarchal of things, but. But what I don't understand is that I love commitment. It's for. Marriage is for the insecurities. Excus. You're sounding pretty insecure to me. Smelt it. Delta, pot and kettle. Why don't you take a look in the mirror, sir? Why don't you take a look in the mirror, sir? Because it takes a lot of security to do what I'm doing. To put your whole self aside and have. And. And have enough confidence that you can love another fully, even though she's the most cultured W. Hottest, smartest, funniest person you've ever met. But you have to know it doesn't make you less. No, because. No, because. You want to settle for a dud. D, U, D. Three letters, as many brain cells as he has in his head, and you're going to take his last name? At least you believe in the institution of marriage. I guess you can't win. You can't win because. Did I just unravel my whole argument? I don't give a. You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? Because if marriage is for the insecures, then aren't we all a little insecure? Don't we all just have to admit it? You're telling me you don't have some kind of an attachment style? And no, I'm not talking about the secure can. No, we're all a little up and I'm a little avoidant. So the commitment helps ground me. I don't have to be scared anymore. I've learned I'm healing, that I don't have to run, that it's okay to be loved. And now I have something to look forward to, which is spending my life with someone that I really love and care about. Robbie, that takes security, the institution of marriage. Now, I don't know. And of course, this is for this. Of course this is for the gays. The lesbian specifically. I don't know how it works in a homosexual man relationship. How does the patriarchy works when there's two patriarchs? I don't know. And you couldn't pay me to find out.
