Old Time Radio Westerns - Good Acting Done Cheap with Smiley Burnette

Podcast: Old Time Radio Westerns
Host: Andrew Rhynes
Episode: Good Acting Done Cheap with Smiley Burnette | All Star Western Theatre (11-10-46)
Original Air Date: September 1, 2025 (Podcast Release)
Golden Age Air Date: November 10, 1946
Featuring: Smiley Burnette, Riders of the Purple Sage, Cottonseed Clark, Foy Willing, and more

Episode Overview

This episode of Old Time Radio Westerns features a classic broadcast of the “All Star Western Theatre” from 1946 titled Good Acting Done Cheap. Digitally restored for modern listeners, the episode is a comedic musical drama set on a ranch, centering on the arrival of cowboy comedian Smiley Burnette and his eccentric manager “Duke,” who are scouting a Western ranch as a location for Smiley’s next film. Along the way, the ranch hands angle for film roles, leading to a cascade of gags, musical performances, and a hilarious audition.

Key Discussion Points & Episode Highlights

1. Introduction and Set-Up (02:19)

• Cottonseed Clark opens the show, introducing the house band, Riders of the Purple Sage, with the nostalgic Western song I Want to Drink My Java from an Old Tin Can.
• The story’s premise: the hard-working team at the Bar BB Ranch (named after Birdie Bell Voorholzer) receives news that their ranch is being considered as a movie location for Smiley Burnette’s next picture.

2. Smiley Burnette & The “Duke” Arrive (04:30)

• Smiley’s manager “Duke” is comically controlling, insisting on doing all the talking:
  • Duke: “Smiley, remember, don’t say a word while I’m gone. It might be used against you.” (05:25)
• The ranch hands (Foy, Al, Jimmy, and Birdseed) hope to parlay the movie opportunity into stardom—and financial relief.

3. Musical Interludes (03:40, 10:30, 16:00, 28:00)

• Several delightful musical numbers by the Riders of the Purple Sage and Smiley Burnette, including:
  • “A Cowboy’s Life is a Life for Me” (welcome song to Smiley, 06:10)
  • “Everybody Makes Me Feel at Home” sung by Smiley Burnette (09:10)
  • “I Learned to Love You Too Late” (15:55)
  • “There’s an Open Range Ahead” (29:45, episode close)

4. Western Comedy and Farce (07:30–28:00)

• Audition Scheming:

  • The group is instantly concerned with how much they might charge—and how to get cast in the movie.
  • Funny moment of negotiation:
    • Duke: “We expect you to pay us. … We expect you to pay us for the privilege of having a great star like Smiley Burnette film a picture here.” (12:32)
    • Rancher: “Our cattle can’t eat publicity.” (13:20)
    • Duke: “Do you have goats on the place?” … “They’ll eat anything.” (13:40)

• Audition Antics:

  • The ranch hands hold an impromptu audition for Duke (with Smiley in tow), improvising a melodramatic play featuring a lovable cattle thief (played by Smiley).
  • Smiley’s comic lines and self-deprecating wit shine throughout:
    • Smiley: “Did you ever write anything before?” [about Birdseed’s script] (18:30)
    • Smiley: “Boy, am I gruesome.” (22:40)
  • Running gag: Duke telling Smiley to “shut up” and Smiley’s gleeful attempts to speak anyway.

5. The Western Audition Play (22:30–27:45)

• Plot Within a Plot:
  The group stages a wild West melodrama:
  • Smiley plays “Vertigo Varicose,” a gentle-hearted cattle thief who always brings what he steals to his mother.
  • The audition devolves into high-energy farce with threats to defend himself with song if cornered:
    • “I can sing my way out of it. Just like they do in them new pictures.” (25:10)
  • Big musical finale: “Mama Don’t Allow No Music Playin’ in Here” with each cast member joining in (26:45).

6. Negotiations and Comic Climax (27:45–29:30)

• After the “audition,” Duke proposes an absurd deal—he’ll let them act if they deed over the ranch to him as a “handling fee.”
  • Duke: “Give me the deed to your ranch and I’ll let you work in the first picture. And it won’t cost you a cent.” (28:30)
• Chaos erupts as Smiley threatens (jokingly) to defend himself with his guitar, bringing the show to a raucous musical close.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Smiley’s Silent Contract:

  • Duke: “Remember, Smiley…our contract! You may say the wrong thing.” (05:21)

• Song Gag:

  • Smiley: “Do you write all them songs you sing?”
    • Smiley: “No, but I sing all the songs I write.” (08:47)

• Rancher’s Hopeful Delusion:

  • “Man, oh, man. I can see myself now on the screen…just a-pickin’ and a-singin’ my fool head off—and me a-kissin’ the girl.” (05:10)

• Dealings with Duke:

  • Foy Willing: “Our cattle can't eat publicity.”
  • Duke: “Do you have goats on the place? Then you’re in luck. They’ll eat anything.” (13:20–13:40)

• Smiley’s Escape:

  • Smiley (explaining how he escaped the Duke): “Old Birdseed here got a ladder and we eloped through the window together. I sprained my ankle though. There wasn’t no rungs in that ladder!” (18:12)

• Show-stopping Threat:

  • Smiley (as Vertigo): “Drop them guns or I’m going to start singing!” (25:45)

Timestamps of Key Segments

| Timestamp | Segment/Highlight | |-----------|--------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 02:19 | Show introduction & premise: guests, cast, and set-up | | 03:40 | Opening musical number: “I Want to Drink My Java from an Old Tin Can” | | 06:10 | Ranch hands prepare for Smiley’s visit and their Hollywood dreams | | 09:10 | Smiley sings “Everybody Makes Me Feel at Home” | | 12:32 | Duke explains they expect to be paid to film on the ranch | | 15:55 | Musical performance: “I Learned to Love You Too Late” | | 18:12 | Smiley’s comic escape and script preparation for the audition | | 22:30 | The “audition play” within a play begins | | 25:10 | Smiley’s “guitar defense” and the musical threat | | 26:45 | Group sings “Mama Don’t Allow...” as musical finale | | 28:30 | Duke’s (final) demand: the ranch deed in exchange for film roles | | 29:45 | Closing song: “There’s an Open Range Ahead” |

Tone & Style

• The show exudes warm, quick-witted, family-friendly comedy, mixing deadpan sarcasm, puns, and rapid-fire banter.
• The musical numbers are uplifting and quintessentially Western, serving both as plot devices and showcases for the cast’s talents.
• Smiley Burnette’s vaudevillian persona and improvisational style spark much of the episode’s humor.

Summary

“Good Acting Done Cheap” is a classic example of mid-century radio comedy and musical storytelling. Its mixture of earnest Western spirit, showbiz satire, and hearty music—layered with Smiley Burnette’s beloved clowning—creates a timeless slice of Americana. At its core, the episode lampoons the Hollywood dream as much as it celebrates Western community, all while delivering toe-tapping tunes and hearty laughs.

Recommended for:
Fans of radio comedy, vintage Westerns, musical variety shows, and those seeking a lighthearted, nostalgia-filled listen filled with classic tunes and enduring good humor.