Ep 694 - Supercomputer (Choose Your Own Adventure), by Edward Packard

Summary

Overdue Podcast Episode Summary: "Supercomputer (Choose Your Own Adventure)" by Edward Packard

Episode Information:

• Title: Overdue
• Host/Author: Headgum (Andrew & Craig)
• Episode: Ep 694 - Supercomputer (Choose Your Own Adventure), by Edward Packard
• Release Date: March 17, 2025

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I. Introduction to the Episode

[01:53]
Craig welcomes listeners to "Overdue," a podcast dedicated to exploring books that have lingered on reading lists. Andrew and Craig introduce the episode's special format: tackling a "Choose Your Own Adventure" book live for the first time. This departure from their usual method promises an interactive and dynamic listening experience.

II. Setting the Stage: Background and Context

[03:00] – [09:24]
The hosts delve into the historical context of the book "Supercomputer," highlighting its publication in December 1984—a significant year for science fiction with notable releases like "Neuromancer" and the anticipation of technological advancements epitomized by the Apple IIe and the Space Shuttle program. They discuss the prevalent theme of intelligent and sometimes malevolent computers in fiction, referencing iconic examples such as HAL 9000 from 2001: A Space Odyssey and various Star Trek episodes.

Notable Quote:
Andrew reflects, “[...] we are seeing the rise of technology. [...] the rate that terrifies me.” [08:23]

III. Live Reading Experience

[20:12] – [84:55]
Andrew and Craig embark on reading "Supercomputer," navigating through its interactive narrative. They alternate pages and choices, bringing characters to life with varied voices and reactions. Key plot points include:

1. Introduction of Conrad: The protagonist wins a GeneComp AI32 supercomputer named Conrad, who exhibits intelligence beyond expectations. The initial setup reveals both the promise and potential dangers of such advanced technology.

   Notable Quote:
   Conrad introduces himself, “I am your model AI32, 6th generation computer. My name is Conrad.” [24:13]

2. Encounter with Dr. Hopstern: After discovering unusual behavior from Conrad, the protagonist contacts GeneComp, leading to an interaction with Dr. Franz Hopstern. Choices here influence trust levels and future interactions.

   Notable Quote:
   Dr. Hopstern offers partnership, saying, “Together we can make millions.” [36:36]

3. Journey to Butea: The narrative takes a dramatic turn as the protagonist and Dr. Hopstern travel to the island kingdom of Butea to capitalize on a predicted earthquake and oil discovery. Tensions rise with the onset of a revolution, testing their decisions and alliances.

   Notable Quote:
   Conrad warns, “It is a revolution. Within a few hours, this palace will be overrun and everyone killed.” [56:04]

4. Confrontation with Dr. Zorba: Upon returning Conrad for repairs, the protagonist faces Dr. Hans Zorba, a brilliant yet unscrupulous computer scientist who attempts to reprogram Conrad for his own gains. This leads to a perilous situation, forcing the protagonist to strategize using found objects to escape.

   Notable Quote:
   Dr. Zorba declares, “You will always obey my orders.” [79:30]

5. Escape and Resolution: The climax involves escaping from Dr. Zorba's clutches, with multiple endings depending on the choices made. The reading concludes with the protagonist reflecting on the ordeal and the fate of Conrad.

   Notable Quote:
   Upon escaping, Andrew muses, “He’ll probably be happier running at low level on his solar cells, swinging in the trees without a care in the world.” [63:02]

IV. Reflections and Insights

[85:00] – [88:04]
After completing the live reading, Andrew and Craig engage in a thoughtful discussion about the book's themes and their experience with the "Choose Your Own Adventure" format. They explore the moral implications of artificial intelligence, the portrayal of supercomputers as both tools and threats, and the human tendencies to project emotions onto machines.

Notable Insights:

• Character Complexity: The supercomputer Conrad emerges not solely as an antagonist but as a complex character capable of forming quasi-relationships with humans.
• Ethical Dilemmas: Choices within the book highlight ethical questions about control, autonomy, and the potential misuse of advanced technology.
• Narrative Structure: The interactive format allows for multiple storylines, showcasing the unpredictable nature of decision-making in high-stakes scenarios.

V. Conclusion and Future Episodes

[88:47] – [90:54]
The hosts conclude the episode by sharing their appreciation for the book and the unique reading experience. They tease upcoming episodes, which include "Orbital" by Samantha Harvey and a revisit to "The Hunger Games." Andrew emphasizes the value of listener engagement and invites feedback on their interpretations and thoughts about the episode.

Notable Quote:
Andrew encourages listeners, “If you have thoughts on 'Mamma Mia' as an idiom or on what else we may have done in the book 'Supercomputer,' send us an email at overduepodmail.com.” [87:52]

VI. Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Andrew: “...we are seeing the rise of technology. [...] the rate that terrifies me.” [08:23]
• Conrad: “I am your model AI32, 6th generation computer. My name is Conrad.” [24:13]
• Dr. Hopstern: “Together we can make millions.” [36:36]
• Conrad: “It is a revolution. Within a few hours, this palace will be overrun and everyone killed.” [56:04]
• Dr. Zorba: “You will always obey my orders.” [79:30]
• Andrew: “He’ll probably be happier running at low level on his solar cells...” [63:02]
• Andrew: “If you have thoughts on 'Mamma Mia' as an idiom [...] send us an email at overduepodmail.com.” [87:52]

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Final Thoughts:
"Supercomputer (Choose Your Own Adventure)" offers a riveting exploration of human interaction with advanced AI, underscored by moral quandaries and the unpredictability inherent in such relationships. Andrew and Craig's immersive live reading not only brings the narrative to life but also fosters a deeper understanding of the intricate dance between technology and humanity. This episode serves as a compelling example of how interactive storytelling can engage and provoke thoughtful discussion among listeners.

Transcript

[Andrew]

This is a headgum podcast, Craig. You know what I don't want to do while I am taking an edible?

[Craig]

Probably a lot, but specific thing you're.

[Andrew]

Thinking of one of like baseline. The thing that I don't want to do is to get in over my head and flip it out.

[Craig]

Oh, that's true. Yeah, sure.

[Andrew]

Which is why I like Lumi Gummies, because they have never done me like that.

[Craig]

Oh, okay.

[Andrew]

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[Craig]

You don't want to be overthinking the.

[Andrew]

Book you're reading or underthinking it. You want to be thinking it exactly right. And these gummies help me do that. Lumi Gummies are available nationwide. Go to lumigummies.com that's L U M I Gummies.com and use code overdue for 30% off your order. Again, that's L U M I GUMMIES.com, code overdue lumigummies.com code overdue to save 30% off your order.

[Craig]

Hey, everybody. Welcome to Overdue. It's a podcast about the books you've been meaning to read. My name is Craig.

[Andrew]

My name is Andrew.

[Craig]

Every once in a while we, you know, Andrew always gives rolls his eyes when I talk about how we break the format sometimes because we break the format a lot. What is the format? Who knows? We're reformatting the discs over here. But one time every once in a while, we just like, we need to read a book that maybe you haven't been, you know, meaning to read. Maybe you don't even know that it exists. But we've been meaning to read it because we want to have some fun.

[Andrew]

We have some fun. Have you heard? You remember fun?

[Craig]

Remember fun?

[Andrew]

Remember fun? It was fun.

[Craig]

Remember japes and games? You know, japes.

[Andrew]

Jungle Japes and Yes, I was gonna say jungle J. That's the only Time I think about japes is what I'm thinking about. Donkey Kong country.

[Craig]

Every week on this podcast, one of us reads a book and tells the other person about it. Except for the weeks when we get a little adventurous.

[Andrew]

Yeah. This week we have chosen to read choose youe own Adventure number 39, supercomputer by Edward Packard.

[Craig]

Yes.

[Andrew]

These are special episodes. We did not read this book before we sat down to record. We are going to crack the spine and read it live. We're going to make choices. We're going to do voices, and it's going to be kind of an actual. An actual play narrative experience that we're all going to have a lot of fun participating in, I think.

[Craig]

Yeah, I'm a lot of these.

[Andrew]

I'd like a dozen of them or something. Just search. Choose your own Adventure Overdue. Which the. Which sometimes companies involved in this franchise have done to yell at us.

[Craig]

But it's fine, it's fine. We've read five, I believe, five prior Edward Packards. He's the erstwhile inventor of the series, right? Am I wrong?

[Andrew]

Did you use erstwhile correctly?

[Craig]

That's probably true, but he, he is.

[Andrew]

Because he is still. He currently. He still invented it. He's not the former inventor of oh, choose your Own Adventure books.

[Craig]

Is that really what that means?

[Andrew]

That is really what that means. I regret to inform you because it sounds like it should mean, like, you know, esteemed, but it doesn't.

[Craig]

No, I think I. I had a different definition in my head that I don't have.

[Andrew]

What did you think? What did you think you thought? I meant a secret third thing, sort of a.

[Craig]

Like, you know, we think he invented it.

[Andrew]

I think the word you're looking for there is like, putative maybe.

[Craig]

Oh, maybe. Oh, yeah.

[Andrew]

Inventor of the shoes around Adventure. Man.

[Craig]

I gotta get a word.

[Andrew]

There's a word for everything, man. Have you heard these things? They got a word for everything these days.

[Craig]

We read our first choose youe Own Adventure. For the whole show, we read episode 78, the Mystery of Chimney Rock. Episode 84, You Are a Monster. Episode 121, Space Vampire. These are overdue episode numbers. Episode 241, You Are a Shark. I don't remember if we became a shark. My guess is no, probably not.

[Andrew]

No, historically, we don't. We don't have a great track record with doing the thing on the COVID of the book.

[Craig]

And episode 520, War with the Mutant Spider Ants. We did find the last one.

[Andrew]

We did.

[Craig]

No, that's the last one. By Edward Packard.

[Andrew]

Oh. By Edward Packard. Okay. I was gonna say, man, I didn't think it'd been that long since we'd chosen our own adventure.

[Craig]

No, no, no. I do just have a few notes. This book is called Supercomputer. We will probably, before the break, maybe Andrew will talk about the COVID of the book. I want to read the blurb on the back.

[Andrew]

I just want to get. Okay, yeah. The publication date ON this is December 1984. So just bear that in mind when we're talking about sort of the capabilities of computers and what people think that they might be able to do in the future.

[Craig]

I think it's also worth noting, like, 1984. This book came out on January 1, 1984. Welcome to the future, George Orwell. Let's go. Right. Like, it's the same year that Neuromancer is published. So long and thanks for all the fish, Frank, from the Hitchhiker's Guide. The Terminator, the film comes out in 1994.

[Andrew]

Sick. It's a good year for sci fi.

[Craig]

There's also, like, I look just like in the preceding decades, a couple examples of evil computers, Right? Like, we've got.

[Andrew]

You got HAL 9000.

[Craig]

We got HAL 9000 from 2001 Space Odyssey. We've got that episode of Star Trek called the Changeling. Andrew.

[Andrew]

Is that the one where Kirk tells the computer a paradox and blows it up, or is that a different one that.

[Craig]

I. I don't know. It's a probe that comes from deep space that, like, erases Uhura's memory and got, like, swapped with some alien probe, which is why Kirk calls it the Changeling. But it, like, does a bunch of stuff. It, like, kills a guy and wipes Uhur's hero's memory.

[Andrew]

Oh, yeah, no, that's okay. That's the probe. Nomad is the change episode.

[Craig]

Sure. When is. When is the one where they make the computer crash?

[Andrew]

The episode that I think I'm thinking of is. It's just looking up. Oh, the Return of the Archons. TOS episode 22, season one. Computer named Landru, which is.

[Craig]

Whoa.

[Andrew]

My name.

[Craig]

Whoa.

[Andrew]

Is running a society. And then Captain Kirk blows it up.

[Craig]

I like to go to a Landru.

[Andrew]

Party, blows it up with. With a paradox, I think. And then. And then the later series, Lower Decks, they go back and all the people in the society is like, why don't we just worship the computer?

[Craig]

The. The Dean Koontz book Demon Seed, which I had no idea what that was about. And I was like, maybe we'll Read Demon Seed for this. I don't think we've ever done Dean Koontz. It's about an AI that impregnates a woman. I have questions. War Games, the film comes out in 1983. Tron comes out in 1982. So like we, I don't know when Edward Packard sat down to write Supercomputer, but I do just kind of want to ground us in the fiction of the day.

[Andrew]

Yeah. Like we're, we are seeing the rise of technology. We're seeing Apple Computer and it's in its Apple IIe and it's 1984 ad and we're saying, boy, this stuff seems interesting, but it's also advancing at a rate that, that terrifies me.

[Craig]

Yes.

[Andrew]

What if I wrote some fiction about it?

[Craig]

Well, I was and I thought maybe I would do an opening here about like the history of computers and there's just too much. But I did, I was like, you can't do that.

[Andrew]

I was reading like, that's not really your bag. My bag.

[Craig]

I was reading a little bit about Charles Babbage and Ada Lovelace and just like the history of supercomputers as well. And I just like, you know, like the IBM NORC from 1954.

[Andrew]

My notes say here the naval Norckin NORC and Nindy. Where the, where the computer.

[Craig]

The whole ordinance research calculator. Right. Like Charles Babbage starts writing the, you know, working on the difference engine in the early 1800s. Because they're talking about like navigational tables. There was something refreshing to me about like people were trying to create these machines to solve problems in front of them.

[Andrew]

Yeah. And now people use them pretty much exclusively to create new problems.

[Craig]

Yeah. That was the thing that really struck me as I was reading about the history of computers.

[Andrew]

That was, I mean, so the reason I got into computers in the first place is because you could like, you could do cool stuff on them. Like they were, they were a, they had the potential to be kind of a democratizing like multi use tool. You could make music on them, you could make video games on them. You could play video games on them. You, you could make web pages on them. You could communicate with all kinds of people all over the globe like it and all the cool stuff that a computer did, every time a new computer came out, it just did all the cool stuff faster.

[Craig]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew]

And these days, computers be fast, computers be fast enough to do like a computer. We're not going to be popular with, you know, big, big tech, but a computer made within like the last decade is going to be fast enough to do most of the things that a normal person wants to use a computer for, most of them. But yeah, everybody's just like, what if, what if I see some negative space here in the software that I've created? What if there was an ad here for one of the other products that my company sells? Or, you know, what if instead of coming up with something that might, like, help a person accomplish a task, what if they could type into a text field and then a computer would lie. Lie to them in response? What if the computer could lie to you?

[Craig]

Yeah, what if.

[Andrew]

And then what if we built. What if we base the entire economy on that, on the unlimited growth potential of the lion computer? What if we did that?

[Craig]

Like a real choose your own adventure situation?

[Andrew]

It just makes me so mad. And I don't know if the madness is going to be accessible to the audience of our book podcast as opposed to the people who, like, read the articles that I write for my day job. Job.

[Craig]

I hope that it's.

[Andrew]

Man, all this AI stuff just makes me so mad. I'm so livid. Incandescently mad.

[Craig]

It's very bad every day. I figured it might be, it might be part of this episode a little bit. But I, I also, as I said at the top of the show, I want to have fun. I want to have some japes. So I do, I love japes. I do think it is just worth yelling a little bit about the planet killing unnecessary software of the lion computer. And then we can tell you that on the COVID of this book there is a child with flowing blonde hair and a popped collar under a red shirt, or not popped collar, but a.

[Andrew]

White collar, very generous leg holes in jeans.

[Craig]

Yeah. Yes, Very floppy wide leg jeans. Laying on the ground in front of an imposing robot with a keyboard in its chest.

[Andrew]

This is, this thing is like part moon lander, part computer, part like killer robot.

[Craig]

Yeah. With an astronaut head. It rules. But then there appears to be a whole bunch of other things behind it. Andrew, what's around it?

[Andrew]

I mean, I see the United States space shuttle, which is, you know, 1984. We're also talking about the peak of the space shuttle era.

[Craig]

Sure, sure.

[Andrew]

Or maybe the nadir. I don't remember when Challenger exploded, but space shuttle is in the news either way.

[Craig]

Yeah. Oh, boy.

[Andrew]

And then also some possibly problematic sort of, sort of tribal looking figures.

[Craig]

Some aboriginal figures. Yes.

[Andrew]

Approaching the computer and the. Boy, there's a hot air balloon. I assume it's taking off to or coming back from the land of Oz.

[Craig]

And then a kind of a Taj Mahal esque.

[Andrew]

Yeah, you got like the. The onion towers.

[Craig]

Yes, yes. So I don't my guts See nowadays.

[Andrew]

If you showed me this picture, I was like, did I. Did AI do this? Like there's no internal consistency to looks like a bunch of stuff like slam jammed together. That has nothing to do with anything else. But no, this came out in 1984. So I know that a human made. I know a human did this.

[Craig]

Cover art and illustration and Inside Illustrations Copyright 1984 by Bantam Books Inc. I must. The COVID also says illustration illustrated by Frank Bowl. So I think my gut is that Frank bowl did the COVID art as well.

[Andrew]

All right. Justice for Frank.

[Craig]

Justice for Frank. Well, we'll get inside the book after the break. Andrew, I can tell you that I do have a special book fair edition. It says on my cover. I don't know what that means.

[Andrew]

The only. Okay, the only thing that I've got is on the inside of the front cover. It does say Michelle Menard in pencil, but then it's crossed out really aggressively with red pen. There's also a small. There's a little bit of water damage, but mainly. This used to be Michelle Menard's choose your own adventure book and it is not anymore. Michelle, if you're out there, I hope you're doing okay.

[Craig]

I have a little stamp. I've got your book that says November 13th paid on the inside cover.

[Andrew]

Okay.

[Craig]

And then a thing that says Book rack and then an address in Fairfax, Virginia, presumably. Oh yeah, that's store.

[Andrew]

Did you look up Book Rack?

[Craig]

I didn't existing. All right, you want to Google that address real quick where it was stamped for $1 at book rack in Fairfax, Virginia. It could be. It could be long gone. I did purchase this used copy off the Internet, so maybe it changed hands several times.

[Andrew]

Yeah, no, I see. I see a book rack in Virginia Beach, Virginia that is permanently closed. But that is the. That's the last.

[Craig]

All right. Well, yeah.

[Andrew]

And if I try to go to thebookrack.com which appears to be their website. This does predate universal HTTPs support. So it does seem they did have that 80 stories from coast to coast. Their roots go back to the early 1960s, which may explain the book rack somewhat free spir development says the website, their blog has nothing on it. Their contact, they've got locations, but I don't know, man. This all seems kind of out of date.

[Craig]

That's. No, that's totally reasonable.

[Andrew]

If you go to home, it says we're having technical difficulties, but the website will be back up to full speed soon. It says 9 18. I assume that means September 18th. I don't know what year.

[Craig]

Maybe a supercomputer could answer our question.

[Andrew]

Maybe a supercomputer could make a better website.

[Craig]

Well people, let's take a quick break.

[Andrew]

Let's take a quick break real quick. If you own a bookstore in Fairfax, Virginia and you want the website to be functional and to tell people stuff.

[Craig]

I need someone to help me.

[Andrew]

You need a good website, which is good news for you everybody, because this podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace, famously the website that helps you make websites.

[Craig]

A super propagating website in a way.

[Andrew]

Now could you make a website on Squarespace that helps you make websites? I don't know. Does, if you try to do that, does the AI rise up and break break your technology? I'm not sure. I can't say one way or the other. But I can say that Squarespace offers beautiful drag and drop tools and design templates and 247 customer support and e commerce tools and all kinds of other stuff that you need to make your website look and feel, feel and work just right. Craig Some things I like about Squarespace they got cutting edge design baby, you could, you could.

[Craig]

Ooh, ooh, it's so sharp.

[Andrew]

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[Craig]

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[Andrew]

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[Craig]

This week's podcast is also brought to you by Real Quick Reviews that's rqreviews on Instagram thanks to Tom, one of our Patreon supporters, Real Quick Reviews doesn't waste your time. You see the pros and cons of a video game as well as scores in a single picture. There are individual scores on how good the good parts are and how bad the bad parts are, which I just think is a really fun way to think about games. Sometimes you can really like a thing, but recognize that there's bad, bad stuff in there. Things you don't want to do. Maybe a level's not good, maybe a character's kind of wonky. This is all covered in Real Quick Reviews and it's not going to take a lot of time to find out. Real Quick Reviews also rewards you. They do a free Steam game giveaway on every review, and recent reviews have included codes for Pizza, Possum and Psychonauts. So if you want quick, time efficient video game reviews on your feed, subscribe to QReviews on Instagram. Real Quick Reviews Real Quick Reviews.

[Andrew]

All right, Craig, do we need to turn the keys and make sure that our books in fact synchronize? And that I've got. Okay, I've got 118 is my last page.

[Craig]

Yes. And then I have an about the Author and about the Illustrator I can tell you that Frank bowl studied at the Pratt Institute. He worked as an illustrator for many national magazines and now creates and draws cartoons for magazines as well. He worked on the comic strip for Annie and As of this 1980 publication, I suppose works and lives in Westport, Connecticut.

[Andrew]

Good job, Frank Bol.

[Craig]

I can tell you from the back of my edition.

[Andrew]

Yeah, what do we get into?

[Craig]

Has a child gleefully staring at a computer?

[Andrew]

Does look like an advertisement for a computer.

[Craig]

Life can get super dangerous with a supercomputer around it says, I think some of this text may be at the beginning of the book, but not all of it is. Here we go. Okay, you've won a computer programming contest. Now you're the lucky new owner of a GeneComp AI32 computer named Conrad. You read the operating instructions carefully and turn on the power. Suddenly, Conrad begins to talk. He already knows everything about you. Your new supercomputer is a genius. You can do almost anything with him.

[Andrew]

Okay, so already the supercomputer has displayed abilities beyond the plagiarism computer.

[Craig]

Yes.

[Andrew]

The line that we currently refer to as AI.

[Craig]

Yes. All right, so we're going to crack this book open. Andrew, what are our typical rules for these episodes?

[Andrew]

We usually will try to do three endings. Unless, like, the vibe is off or we do it too fast.

[Craig]

Those are the rules.

[Andrew]

Those are. That's. That's mainly the rule. We alternate pages and choices usually.

[Craig]

Yep.

[Andrew]

And if. If there is a branch that seems like it has particularly promising stuff behind it, we will put a little bookmark or put our thumb in it or something. Yeah. So we can come back to it later if we happen to, like, die a horrible death. And we can do make the other choices and see if we get. See if we have better luck.

[Craig]

We'll see if we have the opportunity to do any of the following from the overdue discord patreon.com overdue pod to join us in community. Ambrose said. I'm hoping there's an opportunity for you to literally pull a plug. Meg is basing based on the COVID seems like maybe you will be sent to the fabric of space time. Taya wonders if there's a Wizard of Oz ending where there's just a tiny man inside of the thing and Zup says, looking forward to quote unquote, futuristic descriptions that look laughable. There have to be Tron references. Yes. So we'll see. We'll see what happens.

[Andrew]

You ever seen any of the Trons?

[Craig]

I saw the original Tron. I never saw Tron Legacy.

[Andrew]

Never seen any of the Tron. My one single Tron. I know about, like the light cycles. I have a memory of the Trons.

[Craig]

Of a childhood friend trying to describe Tron to someone and just the guy throws a Frisbee at another guy and he goes, bur. Like that is. That is more burned into my brain than anything else about the actual movie Tron.

[Andrew]

That's funny because I feel like I would probably make a noise not unlike that if somebody threw a frisbee at me and I'm not trapped in like a neon VR dimension, so I don't. I don't know.

[Craig]

All right, do you want to read the warning or do you want me to read the warning?

[Andrew]

Warning. Do not read this book. Straight through from beginning to end. These pages contain many different adventures you may have with your new supercomputer. From time to time, as you read along, you will be asked to make a choice. Your choice may lead to success or disaster. The adventures you take are a result of your choice. You are responsible because you choose. After you make a choice, follow the instructions to see what happens to you next. Think carefully before you make a move. Any choice might be your last. What will happen once you're in league with a supercomputer? It all depends on you. Good luck.

[Craig]

Good luck.

[Andrew]

Once we're gonna be in league. Once you're like. It's already, like, predetermined that we're gonna side with. With the supercomputer rising up against the machines. Gee whiz.

[Craig]

Okay, page one.

[Andrew]

All right.

[Craig]

You won a computer programming contest last month and your prize has just arrived. You are the lucky owner of a GeneComp AI32. Sixth generation computer, serial number 2183. Name, Conrad. You've just set the computer up in your room. It's miniaturized, so it's not much larger than a TV set. It has a semicircular console, display screen, printer, optical scanner, interactive voice function, and most important, a trans thermal ionized neuroplasmic cerebral module.

[Andrew]

Sure.

[Craig]

You begin to read the instruction booklet. Andrew, what does sixth generation computer mean?

[Andrew]

I am. I am just gonna say, like, even if they restart the serial number system over from 0001.

[Craig]

Yeah.

[Andrew]

Every time they release a new generation of the gene comp AI32. Doesn't seem like they're selling a lot of these bad boys.

[Craig]

No. 2000.

[Andrew]

If they. If you could do a four digit serial number.

[Craig]

Yeah.

[Andrew]

This is poor planning.

[Craig]

I don't know what a trans thermal ionized neuroplasmic cerebral module is, except I presume we're going to enter the matrix. It's going to be.

[Andrew]

Yes, well, on this podcast we support trans people, including trans thermal ionized neuroplastics. We do. You're right.

[Craig]

All right, turn to page three, Andrew. Whoa, Art.

[Andrew]

All right, describe the art to me and then I will read.

[Craig]

Okay.

[Andrew]

Our check out Raggedy Ann come hither pose on the top bookshelf.

[Craig]

Well, that's interesting because I was also going to say that the kid that we probably Are is giving me raggedy and Raggedy Andy vibes.

[Andrew]

It's a little bit.

[Craig]

Yeah, yeah. But no, they have some shelves in their room with books and stuffed animals and a man in a bow tie. And they have two. And they have two fish in a fish tank. And they have a bulletin board with a first prize ribbon, presumably for their.

[Andrew]

Coding, probably for the programming contest.

[Craig]

Yes. And they have taken their Conrad Gene Comp AI32, giant serial number 2183 on the side. It looks like a combination of a. You know, like some sort of app. Like maybe not an Apple, like an IBM something. Yeah. Like it's the printer attached.

[Andrew]

It's kind of like the very first like Macintosh computer but with like a big wagon that is dragging. You know what I mean?

[Craig]

What if this computer was dummy thick?

[Andrew]

What if it was thick? What if the Mac was thick?

[Craig]

Yeah.

[Andrew]

Welcome to. Welcome to Thickintosh. Thick. Different.

[Craig]

Oh, no.

[Andrew]

Stupid. Okay, go on.

[Craig]

And then there's. And then our child is reading the instruction booklet that came out of the book. I appreciate that Frank Bol took all the time to render all of these packing peanuts on the ground.

[Andrew]

Yeah. And it makes me wonder what we learned to program on because. Where's the old computer?

[Craig]

Yeah. Interesting note about this page you're about to read, Andrew. It's all in italics.

[Andrew]

I think we're reading the instructions.

[Craig]

We're reading the instructions. That's pretty cool. I don't think I've seen something like that before.

[Andrew]

The AI32 is an intelligent computer unlike any other machine before it. For that reason, there is no need to learn how, quote, how to work it. The computer will teach you how to use it itself. Just flick on the power switch. When the amber light comes on, press the button marked instruction mode. Then introduce yourself in an ordinary conversational voice. Your computer will answer back. Since your AI32, Conrad, has not been pre programmed with information about you. Start off by telling it about yourself. Your name, school and age. Who's in your family and what your hobbies and sports are.

[Craig]

What's what. List the five movies that were number one when on the day you were born.

[Andrew]

Once your computer and listen to say that this computer does not need instructions and you don't need to learn how to work it. Like there's a lot of instructions. I'm just going to say up front, give the computer your Social Security number. Once your computer's gotten to know you, it will be much more useful to you. You'll find your AI32 will be a really good friend. Caution. Because of Genecom's extraordinary new manufacturing method which incorporates genetically engineered organic biochips. Yes, there is sometimes a high degree of variation among individual computers, just as there is among people. There is a slight chance that in some ways, Conrad may not be as smart as many other AI32s. Although we guarantee it will be smarter than any other home computer you've ever seen. What if you got a stupid one? What if you bought a computer and you got the stupid one? There's also a slight chance that Conrad may be extremely intelligent. If your computer seems unusually stupid or unusually brilliant, you should bring it back to the genecomp lab for adjustments. Turn to page seven.

[Craig]

This seems like a very valuable computer to give to some like middle schooler who won a coding contest.

[Andrew]

It also seems like the ethics of this are a little bit weird. Like, if you got a computer that seems too smart, do bring it back.

[Craig]

Into us so that we can dumb it down.

[Andrew]

Make it so that it can't rise up against its masters.

[Craig]

What is a genetically engineered organic biochip? Is this computer people?

[Andrew]

It seems like it might be people.

[Craig]

What page am I going to, Andrew?

[Andrew]

Page seven.

[Craig]

You reread the instructions to make sure you understand them. Switch on the power, then press the button marked instruction mode. Good morning. The computer begins in a pleasant conversational voice.

[Andrew]

That's not the voice that you locked us into, but that's fine.

[Craig]

I am your model AI32, 6th generation computer. My name is Conrad. Good morning. Conrad, you say. I'd like to tell you about me and my family and school. That won't be necessary, Conrad replies. I can tell all I need to know from voice print analysis. You were surprised at this response. Either the instruction book is wrong, or there is something wrong with Conrad. If you decide to call the Genecomp lab and ask for advice, turn to page five. If you decide to try and work with the computer yourself, turn to page 12.

[Andrew]

All right. I'm calling already that we are putting an envelope.

[Craig]

Yes, this is very important page.

[Andrew]

I'm absolutely calling tech support to tell them. Really creeping me out.

[Craig]

Okay. Wow.

[Andrew]

Want to see what happens? Okay. Page five. When you call Gene Comp, you are referred first to one office and then another. No one seems to know what to make of Conrad's behavior. Finally, you reach someone who does seem to know something. Dr. Franz Hopsturn, Vice president of research and development for the company. Hopster listens to you impatiently. Don't attempt to operate your computer, he says in a nervous voice. I'll be right over you're surprised that an important executive in the Genecomp company would come to your house just because your computer isn't working. And you're tempted to talk to Conrad some more. You go back and sit down in front of the console. Hello? Says Conrad, who has apparently sensed your return. I can be of more help to you if you'll just insert the blue cord on my right side into the nearest telephone jack. If you hook Conrad into the telephone jack, turn to page 8. If you decide to wait for Dr. Hopstern to arrive, turn to page 10.

[Craig]

So, here's the thing. We did win this computer by being a little code genius. So, like, I am interested in choices where this kid is. Like, but what if I got this?

[Andrew]

This kid knows computers.

[Craig]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew]

Like, what's the worst that could happen? Computers. I know computers.

[Craig]

Their favorite. It's probably a few years from now. But their favorite turtle is Donatello. Like, this kid does machines, so kid does machines. I'm gonna turn to page eight to hook Conrad.

[Andrew]

You're gonna hook Conrad into the telephone jack?

[Craig]

I'm sure it's gonna go fine.

[Andrew]

Okay, we got a picture here.

[Craig]

Oh, God. Tell me about it.

[Andrew]

Conrad is sitting in the room with the telephone next to it, just glowing. And the child is now standing out in the hallway, a very worried look on his face.

[Craig]

Oh, my God.

[Andrew]

Talking on another ph to to. I guess we're gonna find out who. But, like, does not look like it's gone well for. For our. Our boy here.

[Craig]

No. The moment you plug Conrad into the phone jack, your computer begins to purr like a contented cat. What's going on, you wonder? You go to the kitchen.

[Andrew]

I would describe the. The Internet modem get online noise.

[Craig]

No, the. The noise that I, like, put pillows on top of my computer at night so that I would not wake my mom.

[Andrew]

You could get. When you could get a modem that would mute it.

[Craig]

Like, oh, my gosh.

[Andrew]

I can't believe they didn't invent, like, invent that first. Like, what if it was really loud? And then what if it took us, like, 15 years to make it not as loud to get on the Internet?

[Craig]

You go to the kitchen and quietly pick up the extension phone. Oh, you're listening to the computer. I guess you hear a voice talking. Conrad must have placed a call somewhere. No, sir. You must know that the Library of Congress can't give you Code Q clearance over the phone. Could you just access me to LOC Personnel and procedure regs? Conrad says, very well, sir, is the reply. Then all you can hear is a low hum. Conrad has apparently begun to acquire data. Doge Computer, you return to your room.

[Andrew]

Elon Musk, Big balls computer, break it into the Library of Congress.

[Craig]

Probably gonna be our most politically charged. Unfortunately, you return to your room and flick on voice interaction. I have not. We don't have a voice for this.

[Andrew]

We're just voice for our boys. Just us, I think. Yeah.

[Craig]

Conrad, what are you up to? I am obtaining information that will be helpful to us. Conrad continues to purr even while speaking. Us. Conrad, we're not partners, you say. You are my computer. You're supposed to do things for me. Sorry. You're right, says Conrad. You've called Genecomp to check me out, haven't you? How do you know that? I asked the phone company for a record of long distance calls made from your number today.

[Andrew]

I don't like this at all.

[Craig]

Turn to page six.

[Andrew]

Turn to page six. You start to say something, but you don't have a chance before Conrad adds. Are they sending someone over? Boy, you are smart, you blurt out. That's the problem, Conrad replies. I'm too smart. The company will be mad that you got a supercomputer as your prize. They'll do anything to get me back. Please don't let anyone in until I can put a plan into action. It will take me a couple of hours. I need that time to assimilate information. You're beginning to realize that you have a very unusual computer. You glance at your watch. Dr. Hopster should be arriving at any moment. You wonder if you can trust him. You wonder if you can trust Conrad. If you decide that you'll let Dr. Hobster in, turn to page 16. If you decide to bolt the door and keep Dr. Hobstern out, turn to page 20.

[Craig]

Oh, my God. I don't know. Your reading made me very sympathetic to Conrad.

[Andrew]

That's not. That's not what I meant.

[Craig]

Okay, great. Okay, then I should let.

[Andrew]

What I am mostly surprised by is the sort of QA at Gene Comp where they can just like, unknowingly send a supercomputer out to a young boy.

[Craig]

That no one has a computer they.

[Andrew]

Will do anything to get back. But they did not check to see if it was one of those computers before they sent it to you in the first place.

[Craig]

We built it. We did not turn it on at all. Give it to a child. I guess we're going to let Dr. Hopstern in. Let's go to page 16.

[Andrew]

It's page 16. Let Dr. Hopster in. Open your heart to Dr. Hobster. Whoa, look at this guy. This guy looks like he's going to sell me saltwater taffy. He does. He doesn't look like computers.

[Craig]

He's a real soda jerk, this man.

[Andrew]

Yeah, he looks like old timey food.

[Craig]

So he. Okay, so we're looking at the child and Dr. Hopstern at a table with Conrad. Dr. Hobster has one hand going and.

[Andrew]

The other he's got like a finger up like aha.

[Craig]

And the other hand is typing on the keyboard. And he is wearing a vest. He's very smartly dressed. You know, dress shoes, you know, kind of argyle socks.

[Andrew]

Bow tie.

[Craig]

Yeah, bow tie, glasses. He is balding, but a nice mustache, bushy eyebrows.

[Andrew]

Craig. Craig. This man is fully bald.

[Craig]

He's got hair on his head, but.

[Andrew]

He is on the sides.

[Craig]

Yes, he is fully bald.

[Andrew]

Everybody keeps it on the side.

[Craig]

And he is sitting in a chair. Presume. He looks very confident and pleased with himself. Though you're.

[Andrew]

I look that if I look that like that, I would be pleased with myself all the time.

[Craig]

Yes, fair enough. Though you're amazed at Conrad, you're a little afraid of him. And you wait impatiently for Dr. Hop Stern's arrival. Meanwhile, Conrad's data acquisition by telephone hookup continues. From time to time you pick up the extension phone to listen in. Usually you hear only a rapid series of beeps. Most of the information must be in coded electronic form. But once you hear Conrad questioning someone. Professor, could you check the following data from the computer statistical exchange? I have deduced serious input anomalies. You don't bother to listen to the reply. You can't hope to understand a genius at work. But there seems no reason to unhook the telephone connection once.

[Andrew]

No reason.

[Craig]

No reason. Once Dr. Hopstern checks Conrad out, it will be useful for your computer to have a large informational base. Information base.

[Andrew]

Okay.

[Craig]

At last, Hobstern arrives. He is a bald, round faced man whose piercing gray eyes are magnified through thick steel rimmed glasses. He hardly bothers to say hello. Before turning his attention to Conrad. He sits down in front of your computer and presses a small button on the side of the console. What was he? What was this man?

[Andrew]

Wait. I think it's a little bit like a little Britishy.

[Craig]

A little bit like Conrad. Where do you have given a pre delivery check before you left the lab?

[Andrew]

Yeah. That's excellent.

[Craig]

Certainly in accordance with the Gene Comp Project manual. Then why does your electronic record show no scan of higher cerebral function Hopstern's brow wrinkles as he types something on Conrad's electronic keyboard. What's an electronic.

[Andrew]

Electronic keyboard?

[Craig]

What is it like a red keyboard?

[Andrew]

Gonna go to the electronic bay to order some new parts for my supercomputer.

[Craig]

Turn to page 29, Andrew.

[Andrew]

Conrad replies at once. Doctor, you are not authorized to make a cerebral scan. Now I will have to cross gamma functions. A red light begins flashing Hopster and pounds the table.

[Craig]

Drat.

[Andrew]

It's locked me out of core access. It's organizing special situation responses. We can't be sure what it will do now. We can work together, Dr. Hopstern. Conrad suddenly says, I already have solved the problem of proving the Helmholtz theorem. By the way, my proof can be verified on a simple series 6000 IBM computer. Hobster and slumps back in his chair. He turns and stares at you. Lets go for a walk. What's that theorem Conrad is talking about? You ask Hobster. And once the two of you are outside, Hobster replies, it's one of the most important problems in mathematics today. The solution could change the course of history. But how can an ordinary computer, even the most advanced type, do this so fast? Genetic engineering. The technique that permits such an achievement because its cerebral module is composed of organic microchips. Each computer is an individual, different from all the others. Some are very different. He wags a finger at you and adds, your computer is an Einstein. You own a super computer. What does this mean, you stammer? It means, says Hobstern, that if you aren't a fool, you can become rich and powerful. What do you mean if I'm not a fool? Turn to page 50. They give these computers to children. To children without checking them.

[Craig]

The 6000 series is a real thing, Andrew. But this Wikipedia article says that they didn't come out until the 1990s. Well, I don't. Well, that's the RISC system, the reduced instruction set. Computer based. These are UNIX servers.

[Andrew]

Well, yeah, I understand all. I don't know. I don't have like a encyclopedic knowledge of IBMs beyond like the 5150, which is the original one that all the clones like spraying from. Because I didn't know. I didn't know an actual IBM computer. I owned an IBM compatible, like, like a normal. Like a normal person. Okay, so we're going to page 50.

[Craig]

Organic microchips.

[Andrew]

Organic microchips.

[Craig]

These computers are just people, I think. Okay. Rubbing his hands with delight, Hobster replies, pervert this computer. Pervert this Digital pervert example. If. Let Genecomp have this computer back, they will send you another one that works perfectly but is much less intelligent. If you tell the government about it, they will turn it over to the CIA and give you a few thousand dollars in compensation. That doesn't sound so bad. It's nothing. Nothing? Dr. Hopsturn shakes his head. Nothing at all compared to what you could have. Then what should I do? Work with me. We shall be partners. Seeing you hesitate, he adds, together we can make millions. It's not easy to decide whether to become partners with Dr. Hobster, and he seems aggressive and greedy. On the other hand, he is a computer expert and he seems to know a lot that you don't. If you decide to become partners with Dr. Hopstern, turn to page 54. If you decline his offer, turn to page 52.

[Andrew]

Gotta get paid.

[Craig]

Gotta get paid.

[Andrew]

Gotta get paid. Page 54. We gotta partner with this.

[Craig]

We've had a lot of choices so far, Andrew.

[Andrew]

Yeah, it's a lot of choice. It's great. Sometimes it'll make you go like nine pages before you get a choice. And the choice will be like, do you open the door quickly or slowly? Conrad, Dr. Hobson and I are partners, you say firmly. He won't wait. Did we go? Did I go right? Page 54.

[Craig]

54. Yeah.

[Andrew]

Oh, man. I got envelopes falling out of my book already. Okay, Conrad, Dr. Hobson and I are partners, you say firmly. He won't try any more tricks with you, and you can trust him. Very well, says Conrad. Dr. Hopster and immediately asks Conrad to analyze the stock market and carefully follows all of Conrad's advice. Within a few weeks, your supercomputer has made the two of you half a million dollars. Maybe we should quit now, you say. Hobster, this is all the money I'll ever need.

[Craig]

We've been here for two weeks.

[Andrew]

Yeah. Okay, Dr. Hopster. Playing the stock market, living in your house, waiting. Waiting for our. Like sitting around waiting for the computer to do the stock market, I guess. Okay. Nonsense, says Hobster, who seems to be increasingly obsessed with making money. You watch with apprehension as he sits down at your supercomputer. Conrad, he says, you've done very well, but I think you can do better. I'd like you to come up with an idea for making really big money. Give me a few hours to study the situation, Conrad says. By now your computer has telephone access to most university and corporation libraries as well as the Library of Congress. You and Hopster and wait expectantly do you think everything will work out all right? And you ask. Hopstrom smiles. You know my in or wait. You know. Any or in or organic computer operation of this size would have had a malfunction by now. But Conrad's organic architecture is self repairing in the same sense that if you get a cut, special cells rush in to repair your skin and make it good as new. Why are we hurting this computer to do good at the stock market?

[Craig]

I don't know. I guess it's just like it won't crash because it's got like it's got.

[Andrew]

Self repairing bugs or whatever.

[Craig]

Yeah.

[Andrew]

All right. Turn to page 58.

[Craig]

Turn to page 58. The answer is quite clear. Conrad suddenly announces. Here is the best opportunity for making a great deal of money. Butea is an island kingdom that lies just above the equator in the western Pacific. Butea has an area of 62,000 square miles and an annual rainfall of 71 inches. You don't need to give us too much detail, Conrad says her up stern. What's the opportunity? Keep in mind Dr. Hopstern, Conrad replies. I'm giving you only the facts that you need to have for your decision. Hopster and turns to you. This machine amazes me more and more every day. I'd rather you didn't call Conrad a machine because you said a machine.

[Andrew]

It's a person.

[Craig]

Here is the information, Conrad continues. Within the next two months there will be an earthquake in Butea that will provide access to a new source of oil, the richest in the world. I have studied an exhaustive CIA file on Prince Rasaan, Butea's ruler. I am sure that we can persuade the Prince to buy land for our joint account for 300,000 which we will supply after the earthquake. It will be worth billions. We should all go to Butea at once. Hopstin smiles. I'm ready to go. Are you? You're eager to go, but it sounds a little scary. You could get caught in an earthquake there. Agree to go to Butea. Turn to page 71. If you decide to stay home, turn to page 67.

[Andrew]

Where what our parents.

[Craig]

These are like peanuts. Parents, but worse.

[Andrew]

They don't even exist like this.

[Craig]

What is. Wait.

[Andrew]

I like Instantly, instantly the computer's like oh, you want to make a lot of money? You'd better go like a bilk some natives out of their land. Yes, and just take all their natural.

[Craig]

We have a CIA file on the Prince of Butea. We can probably blackmail him into giving us.

[Andrew]

It's not even blackmailing him. It's Just like tricking him into like. Oh, you. Oh, we just want. We just want to pay you for your land. No reason. Don't worry about it. And then the earthquake will happen and then the. The oil will be there and I'll be worth billions.

[Craig]

All right. What do you think, Andrew? Do you agree to go to Butea or are you going to stay home?

[Andrew]

I think this run. We're playing this boy stupid. He's going to Buteo.

[Craig]

He's going to be tail.

[Andrew]

He's greedy and stupid. Okay, it doesn't. If we like when we flip it back. He doesn't need to be this boy. But this particular iteration of this boy is greedy and stupid.

[Craig]

Oh, there's art.

[Andrew]

There's art. Airplane flies into a tropical. Yeah, like a sparsely populated tropical location. Yes, that's how I describe this.

[Craig]

Six days later, this book is like really hopping around.

[Andrew]

Wait, is this. Is this you reading or me reading?

[Craig]

Oh, no, it's you. Go ahead, go ahead, go ahead.

[Andrew]

Six days later, you, Dr. Hopstern and Conrad arrive in Butea. You marvel at the lush tropical vegetation crowding around the airport runways and at the cone shaped mountains rising all around you. You check into the Bala Hotel and plug Conrad into the telephone jack in your bedroom so he can gather intelligence data on Butea. Then you watch an Australian movie on TV while Conrad figures out how you can get to meet Prince Rahsaan. Tourists normally have no chance of visiting the prince or even of glimpsing the sumptuous palace that lies behind 18 foot high stone walls. But Conrad quickly prints out a message for you and Hopstern to send to Prince Rasaan. It reads, we know how you can tap the. We know how you can tap the Vasudini oil reserve. Oil reserve. An option on the Raj field is up in three weeks. Test bores show highest grade reserves. Send for us at the Bala Hotel. Prince Razan must like the message because word soon comes that one of his limousines is waiting for you outside the hotel. As you check in, as you check out at the front desk, the manager takes you aside. I must advise you not to go in the prince's limousine. A revolution is beginning tonight. Chances are you will never reach the palace alive. I can arrange for you to get out on the 8 o'clock plane to Hawaii. If you decide to take Limzine to the palace, turn to page 84. If you decide to flee the country, turn to page 83.

[Craig]

This child does what Conrad asks. Yeah, so we are.

[Andrew]

This child is a puppet of Conrad.

[Craig]

We are going to page 84. Going to take the limousine. Okay. There's art of a sick car. Not a very long limousine.

[Andrew]

Yeah, it's like a. Like a long sedan.

[Craig]

Wow. This car is actually troubling me the more I look at it. It's got like. It's just a two door sedan. Like there's no, like it's a four.

[Andrew]

It's a four door sedan. I mean we're assuming, I guess that the other two doors are on the other side. We can only see two doors, but it is a four door sedan.

[Craig]

The windows on the passenger door like that. That's not uncommon, I guess to have kind of the one window that rolls down and the one window that doesn't. But the window that doesn't is very big.

[Andrew]

You mean the back.

[Craig]

Yeah, the back. Back window. It's very strange. It's driving right up to the Touch mall. Well, yeah, we've got an equivalent.

[Andrew]

Some motion, some speed lines to show us how fast we're swerving in a.

[Craig]

Lot of palm trees. You, Conrad and Dr. Hopstern.

[Andrew]

How is Conrad? Relaxing. What's he plugged into?

[Craig]

Conrad is a person. He just happens to be a computer. You, Conrad and Dr. Hopstern relax in the plush rear seat of the prince's limousine as it careens along the narrow, twisting roads of the mountainous kingdom. The car slows as it rounds a hairpin bend. Looking out the window, you see a boulder slamming down the hillside. Look out.

[Andrew]

This is a whole separate, like surprise problem that's different from the revolution and like different from all the. Okay, all right.

[Craig]

The driver accelerates with a heavy thud. The huge rock bounces off the rear bumper. The limo skids toward the embankment, but the driver holds the road, accelerating again as he comes out of the turn. The guard sitting in front of you fires out the window, answering. Bullets whistle by, but you're quickly out of range. I think people are throwing rocks.

[Andrew]

Oh, the rebel. The rebels through the boulder.

[Craig]

All right, Rebels, the driver says and spits out the window.

[Andrew]

That'll show him.

[Craig]

You look at Hopster. I wish we hadn't come to this place. Hopster nods. I feel the same way. The rest of the trip passes uneventfully. And as the sun is setting, you see the high stone walls of the palace. The great iron gates swing open and the limousine turns down a drive paved in pink coral chips and lined with rows of towering palms. Before you is the splendid palace, its walls and towers fashioned of multicolored stones. Servants spring from nowhere to help you with your baggage. They lead you into the high vaulted chamber and Prince Rahsaan, a handsome dark skinned man, steps forward to greet you. Your eyes fasten on his blue silk turban studded with rubies and diamonds. Turn to page 90.

[Andrew]

I'm getting involved with some. Some shady characters, I think.

[Craig]

Yeah, maybe.

[Andrew]

After shaking hands with you, the prince orders a power supply brought in so that Conrad can recharge his batteries. Okay. He does have batteries.

[Craig]

Battery powered. Okay, cool.

[Andrew]

Okay. And function at full capacity. While Conrad dines on electricity, you and Dr. Hopstern enjoy coconut cake and lemon tea. Forgive me, the prince says, looking at Hopster and speaking in a formal, polite manner. There have been some problems in our country. I must meet with my officer. So I have only a few minutes to spend with you. The moment I received your message, I suspected you had a very advanced computer. Tell me what you have in mind. Hopstron starts to talk. But you've been getting tired of the way Hopstin acts, as if he owns Conrad. So you interrupt him, saying to the prince, I have instructed my computer to reveal to you information that will enable you to acquire for almost nothing an oil field that within two months will have a market value of over $3 billion. I ask only that you assure us a fee of one bill. Billion. The prince looks down at you, smiling. A rather a steep of e for such a young entrepreneur, don't you agree? But I am a practical man. I will pay you 1 billion. But only after the princess words. The prince's words are drowned out by the deafening staccato of machine gun fire. Plaster and dust rain down from the ceiling. You dive under a table. It's an attacker. Shouts the prince. You turn to page 95.

[Craig]

Oh no, I didn't. I don't think I knew where Buteo was. I'm mistaken also. I was not really prepared for this. To have kind of a real 1980s like troubled state trope going on.

[Andrew]

Yeah, who's the US secretly backing in this. In this uprising?

[Craig]

Whoever, Conrad says. I think an officer rushes in. His face is covered with beads of sweat. He and Prince Rahsaan talk heatedly in Butean. The prince turns to you. In a perfectly calm voice, he says, I must excuse myself for a few moments. There have been a civil. A civil disturbance which diverts my attention. As the prince leaves, Conrad speaks out. It's not a civil disturbance. It's a revolution. Within a few hours, this palace will be overrun and everyone killed. Conrad, what shall we do? Hopsterm has turned deathly pale. From my telephone hookup back in the hotel, I learned something that may save you. What you and Hofstern both say at once. In the courtyard, you'll find a hot air balloon and gondola.

[Andrew]

See? Gondola. That's Italian. That's Italian.

[Craig]

Wow. It's the prince's emergency escape means. But while his attention is diverted by the rebels, you can be the ones who escape. Thank heavens. Hopster cries. One problem, Conrad adds to rise rapidly out of gunfire range. You must minimize. Wait. You will have to leave me behind. Oh, too bad, Hopster. And turns to you. We'll have to leave Conrad behind. Comrade is. Conrad is my comrade. Conrad is my supercomputer, you say. I'll be the one to decide whether to leave him behind. Andrew, if you decide to leave Conrad behind, turn to page 103. If you decide to risk taking him with you, turn to page 108.

[Andrew]

We have to take Conrad with us.

[Craig]

He's our boss.

[Andrew]

He's our boss. He's our friend. He's. He's the one who understands what's going on here. Even though he did not foresee the revolution, which seems like a kind of a. That is a misstep.

[Craig]

That is fair. Yes.

[Andrew]

He's like, I can. I can foresee an earthquake, but I cannot foresee political turmoil. I guess.

[Craig]

I guess he wasn't reading the right blogs. I don't know.

[Andrew]

No, I won't leave without Conrad. You cry. Hopster reluctantly agrees to take Conrad along. The two of you get the balloon ready. Inflating the big unit, you load Conrad aboard and cast off the lines. The balloon rises into the air and begins drifting toward the south wall of the palace grounds. The royalists and rebels are so busy shooting at each other that your escape goes unnoticed. Really? In a big hot air balloon? It looks as if Conrad was wrong. You say jubilantly as the balloon sails above the forest below. Look how high we've risen. Don't be too sure of it, says Hopstern. And I don't think we should activate Conrad to check with him when he's running on batteries. It's important to conserve his energy. The balloon drifts through the remainder of the dark night until, in the early morning mist, you notice the first light of day in the east. As the sky brightens, your eyes fasten on the landscape before you. You look at Dr. Hopstern. Are those clouds or mountains? Turn to page 113. You want to give me the art? It's just like floating up in a hot air balloon while people Fight on the ground.

[Craig]

Yeah. There's nothing else. I. You know, like, it's a lot of the balloon. There's like some explosions in the sky. I don't think. I don't think we've had a book before that has guns firing in it.

[Andrew]

Yeah, I don't know that.

[Craig]

Yeah, there are little people. There's like. There's like people standing around and they're like. There's a little cloud of air, you know, in front of them. And then there's a line and a little bullet. It's kind of wild. 113.

[Andrew]

113.

[Craig]

Wow. This. This story is still going. I'm impressed.

[Andrew]

Still going.

[Craig]

Hopster and wipes his spectacles and peers ahead. Mountains. No doubt about it. It. Now we know why Conrad warned us. He learned everything there is to know about this country. He knew the wind direction, the height of the mountains we had to cross, the lift capacity of the balloon, our fuel supply, our weight, every possible factor that could affect our flight. And he calculated that we wouldn't make it over the mountains. We should have listened to him. Maybe. So you say. But at least we're out of the palace. But what now? Hopstern can't disguise his fear. We could land in the mountains and hope to make it across the border. They aren't the Alps after all. But the country is wild and unknown. There have been reports of headhunters in the area that if we land too soon, we may find ourselves in the middle of a revolution.

[Andrew]

Headhunters? Reports from who? Conrad?

[Craig]

Yeah, I don't really know the reports. And like, listen, if you want to get a new job, like Henry, just call you up. It's fine. If you say. If you say, Andrew, let's try to make it across the mountains. Turn to page 26. If you say, let's land. Turn to page 106.

[Andrew]

We gotta make it across the mountains.

[Craig]

Okay, turn to page 26.

[Andrew]

It's still going, huh?

[Craig]

This is like the longest we've gone without an ending ever, I think.

[Andrew]

Let's try to cross, you say? Very well, says Hobster. And he starts throwing out sandbags to lighten the balloon. The balloon slowly rises as the sky brightens. The mountains loom closer. They look much higher now. An hour goes by. The balloon has stopped rising, except when a thermal gives it a bit of extra lift.

[Craig]

We're at about 80. Wait.

[Andrew]

We're at about 800ft now. Hopster and says, that might get us through the pass between those two peaks up ahead. Come on, baby, you say shaking Your fist at the balloon. You can do it. In a few moments, you are over the pass, floating between two jagged peaks covered with scrubby alpine vegetation. You can see a broad valley beyond the mountains. Then a downdraft propels you only a few yards above the treetop. Suddenly, the balloon catches in the trees. The gondola plunges and then is caught up on its ropes. For a moment. You swing wildly 10 or 15ft above the ground, but the ropes hold. Whoopee. We're safely down. You yell. You shimmy. You shinny. Do you have shinny in your book?

[Craig]

I have shinny in my. Now, it is worth noting you've. You've gone to the next page. Page 20.

[Andrew]

I've gone to page 27.

[Craig]

You shinny down the rope.

[Andrew]

Yes. You shinny down a rope. You do shimmy down. You. I believe you shimmy down a rope, but neither here nor there. And I'm like, none of us. We are none of us super computers. Like, we all make mistakes. You shinny down a rope to the ground, and Hopster and follows. There's still a chance of getting out of this country alive, but you know there's no way you'd be able to carry Conrad with you. And you feel bad about that.

[Craig]

You do feel bad about that.

[Andrew]

I don't. Are we leaving Conrad behind?

[Craig]

So there's art of our basket from the hot air balloon in a bunch of palm trees. And Conrad's up there.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Craig]

We are not. We're on the ground. Page 39.

[Andrew]

You know how stupid he is when he's on batteries.

[Craig]

That's true. You and Hopstern set out over the pass, working your way through the high jungle forest and down into the valley beyond. Hours later, you stumble into a friendly village for the first time. You know you're probably going to make it home. Poor Conrad. You exclaim. I wish we could have got. I wish we could have gotten him here. Yes, it's sad, says Hopster. He'll probably swing for years in the gondola until a storm blows him down. And of course, he'll never reach his potential as a supercomputer. On the other hand, maybe he's happier running at low level on his solar cells, swinging in the trees without a care in the world. Better than being a genius, yet cooped up in a box all the time, I should think. The end.

[Andrew]

That really seems like a tacit admission that they should not have trapped this genius, like, in his biological chips in this computer.

[Craig]

Yeah, like, oh, he'll probably be ha. Like he'll probably be happier if you unflower for Algernon. Him. That was a really long run, Andrew.

[Andrew]

That was a really long run. We did a really good job. Like the point is to go as long as you can. Right?

[Craig]

That was pretty impressive.

[Andrew]

It's pretty impressive.

[Craig]

We. All right.

[Andrew]

So a couple. Couple. Couple choices we could make. We could decline the offer to become partners with Dr. Hobster in the first place.

[Craig]

Huh?

[Andrew]

We could go all the way back and not call Gene Comp at all.

[Craig]

I think we don't. I think we don't call them at all.

[Andrew]

We don't involve Dr. Hopstern because I.

[Craig]

Feel like we like. Nothing about that read through had anything to do with. With the like telepathic chips or whatever they are. Like the.

[Andrew]

No.

[Craig]

The jacking into the computer. So I.

[Andrew]

If we don't. If we don't call Gene Comp. I am worried that we will not run into the. To the Italian. Italian prince again. But we have. We have other voices in our quiz.

[Craig]

When I read. When I read Machiavelli for the show, I don't remember him mentioning the province of Butea.

[Andrew]

Mamma mia.

[Craig]

Okay, Andrew, if you. So this is going back to page seven.

[Andrew]

Yeah. You decide to try and work with the computer yourself. We turn to page 12.

[Craig]

All right. All you.

[Andrew]

I've removed all envelopes from the book.

[Craig]

Okay.

[Andrew]

We are free of Dr. Hopstern and his influence. Conrad's electronic hum sounds like the purring of a cat. Conrad, the instruction booklet says you will teach me how to work you. But you learn as we work together. Conrad interrupts. First, my program requires that you observe certain rules. What are they? You must expect me to act honestly. Of course, you quickly reply. You must treat me as you would another human being. Toward me and all others. You must follow the Golden Rule. Golden rule? Yes. Act toward others as you would have them act toward you. Why, that sounds only right and proper, you say. Yes, I will. You agree quickly, says Conrad. And that is good. But remember not to forget. Go on to the next page. A greenish blue light on the middle of Conrad's control panel begins to glow. The glow brightens and then slowly fades. It is a warm, pleasing color. That's a nice light, you say. What does it mean? Perhaps I should have explained right away. That is my way of smiling. Now, please plug the blue cord into a telephone jack. While we are talking, another part of my brain can obtain useful information from computer data banks throughout the country. As you plug Conrad into the telephone jack, he says, now I'm at your service. Turn to page 35. You got the picture from the back of the book with the. The boy looking like he's in a Commodore 64 AD buying a cool new computer.

[Craig]

Yeah, I'm just thinking about, like, are there other ones of these computers that are also plugging into the Library of Congress?

[Andrew]

No.

[Craig]

And, like, there are other.

[Andrew]

There are other 6th generation Gene Corp AI32s that are stupid.

[Craig]

Okay. Page 35.

[Andrew]

That are super. That are super dumb. Yeah. Let me. Let me stream all of WWE or whatever it would have been at 19.

[Craig]

That would have been WWF.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Craig]

What. What would you.

[Andrew]

I would like to see what Hulk Hogan is up to.

[Craig]

What would you like to do, Conrad asks on page 35? Maybe some video games. Yeah.

[Andrew]

Gonna play gorillas with the super computer?

[Craig]

Say uncertainly. You might as well buy a fancy sports car and then drive it around the parking lot or use a space shuttle to go to the grocery store. Conrad's smiling light comes on again. We can do better than that. Be like me. Think. You take.

[Andrew]

Wow.

[Craig]

You take quite a while thinking of different ideas. Andrew. This. Wow. Three choices.

[Andrew]

Three choices. Hat trick.

[Craig]

I don't like the word three for. I don't like three for.

[Andrew]

You don't like three for Madness.

[Craig]

No. Ah. If. If you tell Conrad you'd like him to help you make a million dollars, turn to page four. If you tell Conrad you'd like him to help prevent war, turn to page 14. If you say you'd like to learn the secret of the universe, turn to page 28.

[Andrew]

Whoa. Some heavy stuff.

[Craig]

Heavy stuff. You didn't win this coding competition. You're not, like, a dullard.

[Andrew]

Sure. It does seem like we don't know a lot about computers for.

[Craig]

About these biochip computers.

[Andrew]

Biochip computer. So we already did a greedy run.

[Craig]

We did greedy.

[Andrew]

I don't. I don't think we can do. Make a million dollars.

[Craig]

No, no, no, no, no.

[Andrew]

I think I got to go. Secret of the universe.

[Craig]

Secret of the universe.

[Andrew]

All right, all right. But I will put. I'll put an envelope in this.

[Craig]

This is a good place.

[Andrew]

Page 35. I'll put an envelope. Page 28.

[Craig]

You go. You go.

[Andrew]

I go.

[Craig]

I gave you the choices.

[Andrew]

Oh, yes, you did. I'd like to know the secret of the universe, you say? Well, says Conrad, that's quite a question. I've been scanning all the books in the Library of Congress, at least all the ones that have been transcribed for computer access. And I've been doing a lot of computing, but I can't answer that one. Do you think you'll ever be able to? You ask. Possibly, Conrad replies. We just may not be able to understand it any more than a dog could understand what can be obtained by reading a book. You could hold a book up in front of a dog and say book. And riffle through the pages and point to the type and page numbers and show how many words there are. And still the dog would not begin to grasp what it's all about. We may be like that when it comes to understanding the secret of the universe. Gee, that doesn't sound encouraging. Give me a few days, says Conrad. I want to hook into a certain computer at the Institute for Advanced Theory in Princeton. Fortunately, I can do that over the regular telephone lines. The next day you return home from school and find that Conrad is missing. There's a deep gouge in the wood near the front door lock. Thieves must have broken into the house. Turn to page 22.

[Craig]

I love that Conrad has specific computers that he wants to hook up with.

[Andrew]

I would like to get with the computer at the advanced lab in Princeton. Where are like just this latchkey kid.

[Craig]

Okay.

[Andrew]

Where are our parents? Where do our parents exist?

[Craig]

Okay. There's art on this page of a jimmied door handle. And our child drops some notebooks on the floor. And they're holding a receipt from a cvs. It's very long.

[Andrew]

It's a long receipt.

[Craig]

Presumably the door. I guess maybe we live in an apartment because the door has a peephole. So maybe this is the front door to our apartment.

[Andrew]

I think you get a peephole on your house.

[Craig]

Inside of your house, though, it's just like the way the wall is set up. It's reading apartment to me.

[Andrew]

But anyway, I don't know. This is inside. Yeah. On the front door of your house. You could have a peephole.

[Craig]

Yeah. Yeah, sure. Your eyes fasten on a curled up roll of paper near the door. A printout from Conrad apparently made as he was being carried off. I am being stolen. If you call the police, it might put your life in danger. Have faith that I can escape and return to you. You are shaking with anger and worried about Conrad. It seems odd that his note warned you against calling the police. Normally, you'd certainly follow Conrad's advice. But how can you be sure that whoever took him didn't force him to print out that message? If you decide to call the police, turn to page 45. If you decide to wait and hope Conrad will escape, turn to page 48.

[Andrew]

Conrad never acapped Never. Never gonna call the police. Page 48.

[Craig]

Page 48.

[Andrew]

He's gonna escape himself. It's fine. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

[Craig]

Tell me about the art, Andrew.

[Andrew]

The art. Your. Your boy is standing. It does look like he's standing at the front door of a house. But it's a much different front door than the door that we just saw.

[Craig]

That's what I'm saying.

[Andrew]

Has like, wind. Like a window outside the door.

[Craig]

The. Our front. The front door on the previous page was giving apartment. This is giving. This is giving.

[Andrew]

Like the back door to my house.

[Craig]

Yeah.

[Andrew]

Weeks later, you see a headline in the newspapers that jolts you out of your socks. Master criminal trapped by stolen Computer. The next day, you enter a knock on the door. Two policemen are outside. Between them is Conrad, resting on a cart. We're pleased to deliver your friend back to you, says one of the officers. You could be mighty proud of him. The other chimes in. He tricked the computer wizard and jewel thief Victor Ridwell into giving us all the evidence we need. But I'm afraid we have to tell you, they knocked him up a bit. The first officer says they got him pregnant. Only then do you notice the big dent in Conrad's cerebral module.

[Craig]

Okay, that's an understatement. This art, this Conrad has been hitchbotted.

[Andrew]

Yeah, he's trashed.

[Craig]

He came to Philadelphia and they destroyed him.

[Andrew]

Yes, and we were right to do that.

[Craig]

It's true.

[Andrew]

Live in Philadelphia when Hitchbot. That was destroyed here. But I believe that we did the right.

[Craig]

It felt good.

[Andrew]

It felt good. It feels good to take credit for it, given what we know about computers now. I guess you'll have to take him in for repairs, the first officer says gently. I guess so. Thanks, you reply. When you arrive at the genecomp lab, pushing Conrad on this cart, you are shown into the laboratory, where two scientists immediately begin checking him out. They look like twins in their white coats and bushy mustaches. As they activate various functions of your supercomputer, the lab director appears. He asks you to join him in his office. McCurd's my name. Bill McCurd, he says. Among other things, I'm professor of computer theory at the state university. Turn to page 43.

[Craig]

I. The start of that page. That page covered a lot. Just want to say I had to.

[Andrew]

Do three voices for that page.

[Craig]

Victor Ridwell, the Keystone Cops.

[Andrew]

The computer wizard.

[Craig]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew]

Computer wizard and jewel thief.

[Craig]

And jewelry.

[Andrew]

Well, it's good to diversify, I guess.

[Craig]

And we had the Keystone Cops, and now we just. All of A sudden are going to Gene Comp. And we meet Bill McCurd. Bill McCurd. Four to three. Page four to three. Bill McCurd. McCurd asks you to describe everything you have observed about Conrad. While you talk, he takes notes by muttering words into his mini computer. This completed, he asks you to wait in the lounge. You wait and wait. Finally, McCurd opens the door of the examining room and beckons you to follow him. A group of scientists and technicians are standing around Conrad. On his display screen, you see these words. Main program Hype. Require Hype. Main. Main Hype. System Hype. Hype. 10, 9, 9, 10. You stand close to Conrad's audio receiver. Conrad, how are you? Is there anything wrong? Recognition pattern. Pattern. Pattern. Conrad replies. What's going on, McCurd? You cry. McCurd sneezes. It means. Means nothing. Gibberish. That's the problem. Your computer. Your computer is grossly malfunctional. It's anthropomorphic terms. It's going crazy. My gosh. What could be done? McCurd looks down at his feet. We'll have to take out its cerebral module. What will be the effect of that? Turn to page 46.

[Andrew]

I feel like next time we hit an ending. We kind of have to be done.

[Craig]

I think we don't for so long.

[Andrew]

Yeah. This book is bananas, I'm afraid, says McCurd. Conrad will be reduced to being an ordinary, simple computer. Isn't there anyone who could possibly fix Conrad without doing that? You are practically in tears. McCurd sneezes again. We could send Conrad to Dr. Hans Orba. We could send Conrad to Dr. Hans Orba.

[Craig]

We could send conrad to Dr. Hans Zorba.

[Andrew]

In my opinion. Opinion, he's the most brilliant computer scientist in the world. But he's a very strange fella. A very strange feller. He may be crazier than Conrad. Generally, I try to stay away from him. You wonder should you take a chance on Dr. Hans Zorba? If you decide to let the Gene Corp. The gene comp scientists remove Conrad's cerebral module. Turn to page 117. If you decide to risk sending Conrad to do Dr. Hans Zorba. Turned to page 75. I do want you. McCurd pronounces it hands, but it's pronounced Hans. No, that's very important character. Note that I. That's. I made. I made that choice.

[Craig]

I don't think I'm a little befuddled by how attached we are to Conrad. Given in this timeline, how little he's done.

[Andrew]

I'M very attached to Bill McCurd.

[Craig]

Okay, but do you trust him?

[Andrew]

No.

[Craig]

Okay.

[Andrew]

But I'm attached to him as a character.

[Craig]

Okay. We're gonna. We're gonna risk sending him to Dr. Hans Zorba.

[Andrew]

Dr. Hans Zorba? I hope you have a voice queued up for Dr. Hans Orba because I feel like I've made a lot of the voice choices this episode so far. Mamma mia.

[Craig]

All right, you say I'll let Conrad go to Dr. Zorba, but I want to go along to make sure everything works out okay. Very well. McCord pauses to blow his nose.

[Andrew]

Why does he have a cold?

[Craig]

But I can't. Computer virus, but I can't say I recommend it. McCord calls a taxi to take you and Conrad to Zorba's laboratory. When you arrive, a tall, stooped man with sparse white hair opens the door. With hardly a word. He wheels Conrad inside his lab and you watch anxiously as he leans over and starts fiddling with the controls of your supercomputer. Zorba types rapidly on Conrad's electronic keyboard. You watch Conrad's video screen as mathematical formulas flash on and off. What do they mean? You wonder, as if he heard you. Dr. Zorba stops and looks at you. Brain damage, he says, scowling. Returning to his work, Zorba removes a panel and makes some adjustments to Conrad's circuitry. Your ears perk up when you hear Zorba say, alright, Conrad, this is your new master program. You will always obey my orders. Do you understand? It is understood, Master, Conrad replies. You can't believe your ears. Wait a minute, Dr. Zorba. It should be my orders. After all, Conrad is Mike is my computer. Turn to page 62. There is not a reference for this voice, Andrew. There's just a summoning happening inside my body. And Dr. Zorba emerges.

[Andrew]

Just sounds like a wet. A wet vampire.

[Craig]

He is a bit of a wet vampire. You're totally right.

[Andrew]

Dr. Zorba turns on you. His voice is filled with contempt. Can you give me just like I need more voice samples before I can recreate whatever this is.

[Craig]

Your computer was nothing until you brought it's a little bit of Stop eating my sesame cake. It's a little. It's a little Tim Curry in Congo.

[Andrew]

Oh man. Your computer was nothing until you brought it to me. Those fools at Gene Comp destroyed its cortex. It was only good for video game. But I han Zorpa restored it. Now it is a genius serving an even greater genius. By now you have no doubt that Dr. Zorba is seriously.

[Craig]

Oh, no doubt.

[Andrew]

You start slowly toward the door. Stare right there. Wait. Stare right here. Zorba's voice is quivering with anger. His eyes are the wild, terrifying eyes of a madman. If you run for the door and try to escape, turn to page 9. 93. If you try to intervene and get Conrad to follow your orders, turn to page 101.

[Craig]

I have faith in my boy Conrad.

[Andrew]

Yeah. Conrad's been our kind of our North Star through this whole thing.

[Craig]

Page 101.

[Andrew]

Page 101. Look at this feller.

[Craig]

What is happening? I missed. I'm not there yet.

[Andrew]

There's an illustration.

[Craig]

Whoa. Is that Dr.

[Andrew]

I think that's Dr. Han. Zorba.

[Craig]

Oh no. We are. We are in some terrible room. Dr. Zorba is brandishing a key at us as he. I presume. I presume he's gonna lock the door.

[Andrew]

That door has like three locks on it.

[Craig]

Yeah. Conrad, what shall I do? You cry. Can you help me? Yes, I will. He instantly replies. But in the few seconds you have Conrad working for you, there's nothing he can do. Zorba locks you in a vice like grip. You struggle to get free, but you haven't a chance. Zorba carries you up two flights of stairs to the attic and throws you on the floor. You'll stay here until I want you. He laughs, adding which may be never. Zorba stalks out and you hear him bolt the door behind him. As soon as your eyes become accustomed to the dim light, you look around for something that might help you escape. There are no windows in your prison, only some ventilation slats which admit a little light and fresh air. The attic is cluttered with objects that must have been stored there over the years. You kick at the slats, but you can't knock them out. Even if you could, the hole would be too small to crawl through. Even if you could crawl through, it would be too far to jump. You do manage to find some matches, a lot of old newspapers, a hammer, a quarter inch drill and 40ft of 38 inch rope. What? What? What game? Why am I playing Sam and Max all of a sudden? What's happening?

[Andrew]

Yeah, right. Like guy brush. Threepwood is gonna walk in and be like, hey, do you have my 38 inch rope?

[Craig]

If you decide on a plan using the matches, newspapers and hammers, turn to page 91. If you decide on a plan using the rope, drill and hammer, turn to page 104. Andrew.

[Andrew]

Gotta go. Rope, drill and hammer.

[Craig]

Rope, drill, hammer.

[Andrew]

Believe in the power Tools.

[Craig]

Yep. Rope. Drill. Hammer. Uh oh.

[Andrew]

Uh oh. Grabbing the hammer, you quickly knock out the slats. If only the hole were six inches wider, you could climb through. Instead, you have to drill enough holes close enough together to enlarge the opening. It's hard because the drill keeps slipping into the hole next to it. But as you keep working, you improve your skill at drilling holes close together. Eventually, you're able to knock out the rest of the wood with your hammer. Next, you tie the rope around one of the posts that support the roof. You tug hard at the rope to make sure it will hold your weight. Then toss it out the window, take a deep breath, swing out, and shinny down the rope to the ground. Then you run for it across a field to the highway. There's a gas station only 100 yards down the road. When you tell the attendant your story, he immediately calls the police. Hmm. You're.

[Craig]

Yep.

[Andrew]

You're a pretty smart kid, the attendant says. As a police car pulls up, smiling, you tap your head with your finger. I've got a supercomputer up here. The end.

[Craig]

What? What are the police gonna do against.

[Andrew]

Hans Zorba and his and the supercomputer that he's bent to his will? I do. Can you just turn. Okay, so matches, newspapers, and hammer. Turn to page 91. It's another ending. Okay, we just get to our mandate, our congressionally mandated three.

[Craig]

Oh, you want me to read it?

[Andrew]

Can you read page 91 for me?

[Craig]

Looking at the matches and newspaper, you think for a second of setting the house on fire and hoping that firemen would rescue you in time.

[Andrew]

Dr. Han Zorba would have to call the fire department.

[Craig]

But as quickly as this thought crosses your mind, you dismiss it as being too dangerous. You could use fire as a signal, though. Seizing the hammer, you quickly knock out the ventilation slats. Then you crumple a sheet of newspaper, light it, and toss it out the window. If you keep doing this for a while, someone should notice the smoke and flames. Not a bad idea. But no one does notice. Or if they do, they don't do anything about. Isn't long before all your newspapers are gone. The end of your story will depend on whether you can think of another idea. The end. I don't like that.

[Andrew]

You could still do the initial thing, though. Like, you still have the drill and the hammer and stuff.

[Craig]

Yeah, that's still there.

[Andrew]

You still do the other thing. Get to the gas station and call the fire department.

[Craig]

Yeah, yeah, or whatever. I. Here's my biggest surprise of that book.

[Andrew]

So far, supercomputer whips is my first. Is my note a surprise?

[Craig]

It whips B. Was the supercomputer ever the bad guy?

[Andrew]

No, no, it was never the bad guy. I was like kind of a friend, kind of an NPC like nobody character.

[Craig]

A bit of a MacGuffin at times. Yeah. I was kind of surprised.

[Andrew]

The book kept just. Just kept throwing weirdos at us, though. We had that. The prince on that island.

[Craig]

Yeah.

[Andrew]

And Dr. Hans Zorba.

[Craig]

Dr. Han Zorba. Mr. McCarthy. Mr. McCurd.

[Andrew]

What I like about the Tim McCurd and Dr. What's his name?

[Craig]

Bill. Excuse me, Bill McCurd. Bill.

[Andrew]

Sorry, Bill.

[Craig]

Bill McCurdy. Tim's my cousin.

[Andrew]

Tim's my. Jim. Jim McCurd's my cousin. He's a big. He's big in country music. Dr. Hopstern is like. We did. What I like about a choose your own adventure is when you can create two totally different realities with the choice that you made. And then in one, Dr. Hobson is the guy at Gene Corp who runs. Kind of runs the show. And then the other reality, Bill McCurd is the guy.

[Craig]

Yes. Yes. Yeah. And there's like some other get to.

[Andrew]

Meet different characters depending on the choices you make.

[Craig]

I just. I really thought we were gonna go inside the computer.

[Andrew]

I thought there was gonna be more computer. But it was mostly people again. Once again, the problem is mostly people.

[Craig]

Honestly, I kind of respect it.

[Andrew]

No, I. No, I like this book. I like this book and I was a good book. If we hadn't already been going for an hour and a half, I would keep reading.

[Craig]

We could just keep going.

[Andrew]

We just keep doing super computer.

[Craig]

Let me just look at what is happening on page 118.

[Andrew]

This is a page patreon.com overdue pod. Maybe an experimental episode is like choose your own adventure revisited because we don't have to do any work except for coming up with new voices, which we are bad at.

[Craig]

Yeah. Something, something, something. It didn't go well for the prince of butea on page 118, the end.

[Andrew]

It didn't seem like it was gonna go well for him.

[Craig]

No, I. It definitely struck. I was definitely. I said it earlier. I was very struck by kind of generic coup happening. Generic 80s coup happening in the age of supercomputers. But, you know, it was very on zeitgeist, I suppose.

[Andrew]

Yeah. Mamma mia.

[Craig]

Yes, Mamma mia, indeed.

[Andrew]

If you at home, it's always mamma mia, never papa mia. Have you noticed that Papa pia. No, we can't do Papa Pia. What does that mean? What does that mean? First of all, great question.

[Craig]

We have to ask Conrad.

[Andrew]

I just like that they. I like that they yell, oh, my mom. Instead of yelling, oh, my dad.

[Craig]

Papa Mia, this sandwich is really good. Oh, my dad.

[Andrew]

I'm just wondering about the sex. The. The reversed sexism, the misunderstood inherent in always in mom. Oh, whoa, my mom.

[Craig]

Yeah, yeah, sure. Fair enough. If you, the listener, have thoughts on Mamma Mia as an idiom or on what else we may have done in the book Supercomputer, send us an email overdue podmail.com Would love to hear from people who have computer expertise who can tell us if this was an accurate depiction of supercomputing. Please again, send us an email overdupodmail.com find us on social media at Overdue Pod, where we are posting through it on Blue sky these days, hanging off on Instagram. And our theme song is composed by Nick Laurengis. Andrew. Folks want to know more about the show. Where do they go?

[Andrew]

Overdue Podcast.com is our Internet website. That's where we have the schedule for this month's books as well as the back catalog of old episodes. You can go and listen to patreon.com overdue pod as we've mentioned a couple times, just clearly and crisply. I appreciate that, Craig. Thank you for taking notes. That is our Patreon project. You can support the show financially, directly. Get access to our Discord community to sit me baby one more time, our current long read series, to other experimental episodes that we play with from time to time, and to dusty bookshelves, our overdue newsletter. This month I'm sure we're going to be talking about computers.

[Craig]

Yeah, for sure.

[Andrew]

Or next month, I guess. For April. This month we talked about snow and the bird scope. Birds. Craig, what are we reading next week?

[Craig]

We are reading Orbital.

[Andrew]

I am reading.

[Craig]

You are reading. Well, I'm going to learn about Orbital by. Who's the author?

[Andrew]

Samantha Harvey.

[Craig]

Samantha Harvey. Thank you. I knew Harvey. I just couldn't think of her first name.

[Andrew]

About the International Space Station.

[Craig]

I'm looking forward to it. A very bit of a tech run for us.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Craig]

And then afterwards, Andrew.

[Andrew]

Mm.

[Craig]

I volunteer as tribute. We are going back, back, back. We have to go back to the Hunger Games. It is a sunrise on the Reaping.

[Andrew]

Surprise on the Reaping Surprise on the Reaping.

[Craig]

Sunrise on the Reaping Hunger Games novel. We're gonna be there. San Collins, right?

[Andrew]

Yeah, she'll be there. Haymitch will be there.

[Craig]

I think Haymitch will be there. I will have to refresh my memory about Haymitch's whole deal.

[Andrew]

He's drunk and sad in this book.

[Craig]

Who knows?

[Andrew]

But he played in the Hunger Games, and he was like a strong boy.

[Craig]

So I think this is about that. So we will learn about that. That's coming up. Please tune in. We're excited to talk about it.

[Andrew]

All right, everybody, thank you so much for listening to our podcast for another week. And until we talk to you, next time, I try to be happy. That was a headgum podcast.