HAUNTED HAYRIDE: Corn Mazes + Screenshots

Summary

Ride with Benito Skinner and Mary Beth Barone

Episode: HAUNTED HAYRIDE: Corn Mazes + Screenshots
Release Date: October 29, 2025
Host: Dear Media
Podcast Hosts: Benito Skinner, Mary Beth Barone

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Overview

In their annual Halloween-themed episode, Benito and Mary Beth don elaborate costumes inspired by Zootopia and Fantastic Mr. Fox to discuss Halloween traditions, embrace their single status, and hilariously reflect on their friendship and the cultural rites of autumn. They each “ride for” their chosen obsessions this week: Benito celebrates the charms and metaphors of corn mazes, while Mary Beth rides for the low-key power and rituals of taking and sharing screenshots. The pair’s trademark candid, irreverent banter takes center stage as they discuss everything from the politics of sexual flexibility to old crushes and gossip, all while exploring life’s metaphorical (and literal) hayrides.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Halloween Episode Vibes + Costume Banter (00:48–03:00; 09:00–10:00)

• Benito and Mary Beth open in a flirty, campy mood, riffing about their Zootopia and Fantastic Mr. Fox costumes, lamenting their single status (“we are both single and we're trying to get dig down. And this is kind of the only thing we hadn't tried.” – Benito, 01:11), and referencing the transformative power of a good fox look.
• Playful but self-aware conversation about their physical transformations (“I have these hip pads in that... look at this little snatch”—Benito, 01:55; “I think you might be sexually attracted to me as this fox”—Mary Beth, 01:46).
• They joke about their audience needing to both listen and then “watch” because “whatever you’re picturing, it’s so different”—Benito, 02:16.

2. Podcast Deep Cuts & Meme-able Language (03:00–06:00)

• A TikTok about “deep cuts” from Ride prompts them to revisit their own inside jokes—“we would never not come to dinner” becomes a recurring bit symbolizing reliability and loyalty (03:20–03:47).
• Mary Beth muses on the assertive conversational maneuver “anyway,” loving its power to seize and redirect awkward or negative exchanges (“Anyone holding their power, going anyway. That, to me, Goosebumps.” – Mary Beth, 05:51).

3. Sexuality, Labels, and Inclusivity (06:21–07:53)

• Engaging, lighthearted critique of sexual roles and rigidity in labels (“Gay guys need to grow the fuck up… Everyone should be verse, if you ask me.” – Benito, 06:21).
• Challenges binary thinking by referencing historical and pop culture moments: “All the Romans were probably verse” (07:06), “What did Katy Perry tell us? ‘I'm not just one thing’” (06:58).
• Candid reflection on sexual boundaries and privacy (“I don't ask sexual preferences to people I don't know… I only ask if I want to have sex with you.” – Mary Beth, 08:36).

4. Gossip, Rumors, and Protecting Your Reputation (10:01–11:43)

• Mary Beth shares a rumor encountered abroad—that she’s a “massive bitch”—and reframes it as part of the “legend” of powerful women (“All great women, of course, are talked about in that way.”—Mary Beth, 10:38).
• Benito assures listeners that behind the reputation, Mary Beth is “a delicate baby chihuahua ballerina princess” (11:00–11:01).

5. LA vs NY Water Woes, Dinner Outings, & ‘Newcomer’ Energy (11:53–13:17)

• Mary Beth recounts a hilariously over-the-top LA dinner where she accidentally ordered $18 water, making it a metaphor for LA’s excessiveness and her conclusion to leave (“I think this is the moment I knew I probably shouldn’t live in LA anymore…” – 12:10).
• Benito jokes that such stories make him “one to watch”—and that having a podcast means they win regardless (13:15).

6. What They're Riding For: Corn Mazes (Benito) (19:34–27:18)

Benito’s Case for Corn Mazes

• Idaho upbringing and autumn traditions: Details the social and emotional significance of corn mazes for teens (hand-holding, early romance, Abercrombie jeans and North Face fleeces—nostalgia overload, 21:46–22:36).
• Turns corn mazes into a metaphor for life’s unpredictability and the importance of getting lost, making mistakes, but always moving forward (“There could be something terrifying around any corner. You’re probably going to make a lot of mistakes. But at the end of the day, it’s maybe not that big of a deal.” – Benito, 23:24).
• Pop culture references to elaborate corn mazes (Saltburn, Harry Potter’s Triwizard Tournament, 23:53–24:05).
• Longing for the thrill of “haunted” mazes and embracing being a little scared (“I like the scary ones...I love that feeling of someone like spooking me and I jump.”—25:33).
• Mary Beth confesses she’s never actually done a corn maze (“I’ve never done one, for what it’s worth…” – 19:46). The conversation turns to their sense of direction (Mary Beth calls hers the worst of anyone she knows, 20:18–20:33).

7. What They're Riding For: Screenshots (Mary Beth) (35:37–42:37)

Mary Beth’s Rhapsody for Screenshots

• The humble screenshot is raised to a symbol of digital girlhood, friendship, and emotional labor (“The way that they didn’t know how single women would use this feature to garner support, to propagandize, to overanalyze, to just build community.” – Mary Beth, 36:06).
• The ritual of sending each other images throughout the day: parsing capitalizations, timestamps, emojis, context (“What are you gonna do—describe it to me? Honey, let’s see it.”—Mary Beth, 36:45).
• Acknowledges the slightly dangerous undertone—“there is a spooky side which is that like, someone might be doing it” (42:08)—and the ephemeral risk of everything you text being saved.
• They each scroll through and share highlights from their respective screenshot folders (favorite memes, bad dates, random internet treasures, 38:14–41:32).
• Screenshots as both artifact and meme currency, a source of power especially for women.
• “I want to use Face ID to have to open it”—Mary Beth calls for additional privacy for her screenshots folder (38:22).

8. Relationship Musings & Single Life Anthems (45:44–48:50)

• The pair open up about being single, going out again like they’re 25, the exhaustion of dating, and self-acceptance.
• Mary Beth, reflecting on bisexual dating, says, “I don't know if I'll ever be attracted to anyone ever again. That's something I’m really bumping up against these days.” (48:08).
• On introducing partners: “Me betting on a straight guy to the point where I bring him to you is just—it’s not going to happen.” (48:25).

9. Meta-Banter and Friendship (30:06–47:01)

• Dialogue punctuated with mutual admiration, comic threats (“The next person who ghosts me, I will name on the pod, first and last”—Benito, 09:10).
• They riff about Instagram stories, radical transparency with each other’s phones, and share the security and openness at the core of their friendship.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Costumes and Self-Confidence:
  “I can’t stress enough that this episode might have to be watched.”
  – Benito, 02:09

• On Loyalty:
  “We would never not come to dinner. Period.”
  – Mary Beth, 03:47

• On Sexuality Labels:
  “Gay guys need to grow the fuck up. Everyone should be verse, if you ask me...”
  – Benito, 06:21

  “What did Katy Perry tell us? I'm not just one thing.”
  – Benito, 06:58

• On Gossip:
  “All great women, of course, are talked about in that way.”
  – Mary Beth, 10:39

• On Screenshots:
  “The way that they didn’t know how single women would use this feature to garner support, to propagandize, to overanalyze, to just build community.”
  – Mary Beth, 36:06

  “What are you gonna do? Describe it to me, honey, let’s see it.”
  – Mary Beth, 36:45

  “Your screenshots folder...it should be hidden. Like I want to use Face ID to have to open it.”
  – Mary Beth, 38:22

• On Corn Mazes & Life:
  “There could be something terrifying around any corner. You're probably going to make a lot of mistakes. But at the end of the day, it’s maybe not that big of a deal.”
  – Benito, 23:24

• On Single Life:
  “I don't know if I'll ever be attracted to anyone ever again. That's something I'm really bumping up against these days.”
  – Mary Beth, 48:08

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Intro & Halloween Costumes: 00:48–03:00
• Podcast In-Jokes, “Come to Dinner”: 03:00–04:00
• Sexual Labels, Satire, & Roman History: 06:21–07:53
• Gossip & Reputation Management: 10:01–11:43
• $18 Water & Ode to LA: 11:53–13:17
• Benito on Corn Mazes: 19:34–27:18
• Mary Beth on Screenshots: 35:37–42:37
• Screenshots Folder Show & Tell: 38:14–41:32
• Relationship Musings & Friendship: 45:44–48:50

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Final Ride or Die Picks

• Mary Beth: Rides for screenshots—essential, powerful, and fun when used for good.
• Benito: Rides for corn mazes—nostalgic, boundary-testing, and a perfect metaphor for the twists and turns of life and friendship.

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Tone & Language

The episode is delightfully chaotic, warm, fast-paced, and full of cheeky, self-aware humor. Benito and Mary Beth keep things irreverent but candid, always ready to pivot from wild jokes to genuine introspection, and vice versa. Their dynamic is both “absolute bimbo” energy and sincere best-friend solidarity.

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Note: This summary skips all advertisements, sponsor reads, and non-content sections as per the guidelines.

Transcript

[A]

The following podcast is a Dear Media production. Hey, can you come pick me up? Yeah.

[B]

What's wrong?

[A]

Nothing.

[B]

Are you sure?

[A]

Yeah. No, I just need a ride. Ride, Ride.

[B]

I just want to have fun.

[A]

Start your engines. Take care.

[B]

I'm Benito Skinner.

[A]

I'm Mary Beth Barone.

[B]

And this is Ry. Try everything. That's my big try everything bit that Mary Beth continues to love to this day.

[A]

First things first. Obviously, acab. We're not condoning the police. The police in Zootopia investigate corruption. So that's what we're.

[B]

You know, they take down the fat cats at the top.

[A]

That's the wolves in sheep's clothing.

[B]

Sheep. Wait, but. Yeah, totally.

[A]

Exactly. So welcome to the Halloween episode of Ride. We are both single and we're trying to get dig down. And this is kind of the only thing we hadn't tried.

[B]

Sorry, I can't look at you, dude. We continue to. You know, we're getting dogged a little bit. But I. I would say we're resilient, we're brilliant and we still got it, kid.

[A]

Why does the caged bird sing?

[B]

Well, I could never answer that. What I can say is you are always cute.

[A]

Thanks.

[B]

And I can't stress enough. I think there's some of you out there. I'm not trying to make you compliment me. I think you might be sexually attracted to me as this fox.

[A]

Well, I have these hip pads in that. I just. I mean this. Look at this little snatch. Little. I almost fell.

[B]

No, literally, these Damn. Nikki.

[A]

Dan. Nikki.

[B]

Your bobbies.

[A]

So I'm serving body. Body tea.

[B]

I can't stress enough that this episode might have to be watched.

[A]

Well, let's just say listen to it first and then watch it.

[B]

Watch it when you get home.

[A]

Because whatever you're picturing, it's so different.

[B]

It's different. You know what? I look like more so than even Nick from Zootopia. Fantastic. Mr. Fox. Yeah. Do you remember George Clooney in that?

[A]

Of course.

[B]

Attracted to that fox as well.

[A]

Yeah. He had swag. He was sexy.

[B]

Because all the fucking foxes get me awake last night. They're talking about me.

[A]

Yeah. So, yeah. This is Halloween. This is how we're doing it.

[B]

We'll see who shoots. Who shoots their shot.

[A]

It's just a normal episode of Ride.

[B]

Yeah, it is our Halloween episode. It's. What's it called?

[A]

The Spooktacular Hayride. Hayride.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I guess we should just start with. We would never not come to dinner. So someone did a TikTok about the deep cuts from Ride.

[B]

I don't know if I can.

[A]

Can you just keep your composure?

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Someone did a TikTok asking for everyone's favorite deep cuts. So not. Come on, Kerplunk, not. This chick woke up in my house. Like, things that we haven't brought up in a while. And someone wrote, we would never not come to dinner. From selling Sunset, which had completely like, escaped me. Totally. And I just love the concept. And I'm pretty sure that they then didn't go to dinner.

[B]

So that's.

[A]

But so we've just been saying, like, well, we would never not come to dinner.

[B]

We would never not come to dinner. And it's something that, like, I think about in my bones. Like, I got what they meant so deeply. Like, I would never not come to dinner. Like, I'm gonna. If there's a reservation, like, I'm pulling.

[A]

Up, well, I'm coming to dinner. I would never come to dinner.

[B]

I believe it was in Cabo at the restaurant where you kind of almost had to go on like a lily pad to get to the area where they were eating.

[A]

You had to hop.

[B]

You had to hop.

[A]

It was American Ninja Warrior, but make.

[B]

A fashion, but do it in Louboutins.

[A]

Louboutins.

[B]

But yeah, we would never not come to dinner, period.

[A]

Just wanted to touch on that briefly.

[B]

Oh, can I talk to you about. Anyway, so I almost rode for this word, but I've just. Like. After Icebreakers, I've been more thoughtful.

[A]

No one had a problem with that episode. I don't know why you're so self conscious about it.

[B]

I don't know. I'm working through all of this.

[A]

Okay, I'm taking off my shoes because there's no point.

[B]

Oh yeah, same.

[A]

And they're really wet.

[B]

Mine are like.

[A]

So we were in Times Square. I think a lot of people aren't even acknowledging the fact that earlier today we were in Times Square. So. Yeah, come and get me, boys. So come and get us.

[B]

Come get us. Hey, maybe together. We don't even know at this point.

[A]

At the same damn time.

[B]

I love Paris this time of year.

[A]

Anyway.

[B]

Anyway, I can't stop thinking. I guess in my new era, which I have a big announcement coming. Again, I'm just trying to shake these.

[A]

What's the announcement?

[B]

Well, you know our daughter who wrote for the Hard Reset?

[A]

Uh huh.

[B]

Well, she got into my head somehow.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

She and the wizard.

[A]

My mind. My mind.

[B]

So I am moving to New York.

[A]

Oh, cool. Well, to tell people. Oh, I didn't know that's what the announcement Was.

[B]

Oh, yeah, you just. You just acted like I found that.

[A]

Out for the first time.

[B]

Yeah, Yeah. I think it's the teeth, the bunny teeth that are so cute.

[A]

Laurel having to flip the teeth up with a Q tip to paint my mouth. I couldn't stop laughing.

[B]

I kept turning and I can't get over Pinky. What a good girl she was.

[A]

She was such a good girl. While we were getting prosthetics and she wasn't even scared of me. She was just like, we. We kind of look more alike now. What were you going to say about anyway, though?

[B]

So anyway, I just. I want to ride for this word. Cuz it's like you'll just be talking to, like if you're talking to something and somebody. So if you're talking to somebody.

[A]

If you're talking to something and somebody, say it again, please.

[B]

Wait, let me quickly. My pants. Anyway, so if you're talking to somebody and like, I don't know, you're interrupted or they say something strange. Like they say something out of pocket, but in a bad way. Yeah, you just go anyway, anyway. But I don't even use it that much. I just love when it's applied. Like, I love watching you do it. I love like.

[A]

And I am doing it.

[B]

Anyone holding their power, going anyway. And that to me, Goosebumps.

[A]

Yeah, you're pivoting and you're taking control of the narrative and the conversation.

[B]

It's kind of like, hey, you just made me sick. So.

[A]

So we're going to. Actually, I was gonna. I was gonna tie up my shirt again, but actually doesn't matter because we're done after this.

[B]

Well, yeah, we already went to Times Square. I've been to Times Square like six times this year. Yeah, I'm like, I can't get it.

[A]

Maybe this could be like one of the last times we go.

[B]

Just shit your pants this year.

[A]

So we've been talking a lot about top bottom verse. You know, my whole thing is gay guys need to grow the up.

[B]

Hey, it's called being an adult.

[A]

Everyone should be verse, if you ask me. I just think it's like more welcoming. It feels more inclusive.

[B]

It's like sometimes. So I'm trying to like be focused on the pod, but it's like the clip is so clear to me. Yeah, it's like dear media, it just knows exactly.

[A]

And I think being aside, obviously, whatever, you know, this is all satire. Everything we see on here, satire. So of course I think everyone should do whatever they want to do. Just want to put a little Disclaimer on it. Everyone should do whatever they want to do. As long as you're not hurting anybody. I just think the top, bottom being so, like, locked into one thing, it's like. It feels so binary.

[B]

What did Katy Perry tell us?

[A]

I'm not just one thing. So we were talking about how, like, all the Romans were probably versed because they didn't have such.

[B]

I said that.

[A]

You know, societal.

[B]

I said that to you and you go and say that? Yeah, because we were just in a cab and it was late. You were just talking about this. You were really, like, fixated on it.

[A]

Well, you said you were like, well, what did they do in the Roman times? Everyone was. Everyone.

[B]

Yeah, it's. It's. Yeah. I can only assume verse, and I.

[A]

Get if you have a preference, but it's like, don't you want to experience it all?

[B]

Yeah, Try everything. What did Shakira say? Zootopia. Oh, this is as much action as we've gotten.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah, it was cool. When the. When the paintbrushes were painting my face. That felt cool. So the other day, I just said to Benny, I was like, I'm about to party on you.

[B]

Oh, no, no, no, no. Wait. Can I say something?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

I'm about to party on you.

[A]

No, seriously, dude. Look at me. I'm about to party on you.

[B]

Look at me like that one more time. I'm about to party.

[A]

You know what's gonna fucking happen.

[B]

I.

[A]

So I love it as a kind of threat, though.

[B]

Of course, though.

[A]

A sexual threat.

[B]

It's always read as a threat to me. I'm about to party on you. No. And by the way, watch me party on you.

[A]

Watch me, Watch me party on you. There's no time when a woman is more hopeful than right before a bikini wax. It's an inherently hopeful act. And I just hope that whoever's out there getting a bikini wax today, they've got the appointments on the books. Hold your head high. Walking in and out is all I would say.

[B]

I want to dub in one part during the verse thing. I just want to say that, like, there's actually nothing I've been asked more in my life. Then what percentage of overcompensating is from your real life? And are you a top or bottom?

[A]

And that's just Hollywood, baby.

[B]

It's definitely Hollywood.

[A]

It's very Hollywood.

[B]

Definitely Hollywood.

[A]

Well, people feel like they can ask you that stuff.

[B]

It's interesting because. Yeah, it's like, I don't ask sexual preferences to people I don't know or just me. I only ask if I want to have sex with you. I don't really need to know anyone else's.

[A]

But that's so true. That's such a good boundary.

[B]

You know what I mean?

[A]

I'm curious.

[B]

Well, you're curious about. Yeah. Gay guys. You got to know what?

[A]

Oh, I just want to know what people are thinking. Thinking what they're thinking about. Can you go?

[B]

Who shows your range, baby?

[A]

Nobody. Nobody like you.

[B]

You're so pretty. Is this I love you?

[A]

I think it's the lashes. I really think it's the lashes.

[B]

I just know this fox. Like, he's a bastard.

[A]

The next person who ghosts me, I will name on the pod first and last. I'm just saying that.

[B]

So I was at a dinner and I spit out my drink because I got the alert and I said, oh, wait, Mary Beth just sent something in the ride. The pod. I saw this and I. I spit out my drink and I told the person I was with and we were laughing. So fudgeing.

[A]

I'm saying your full fudgeing name.

[B]

Yeah. First and last.

[A]

I'm just saying it now. I'm going to tell whoever I fraternize with next as well. Like, just so we're clear, if you ghost me.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You are getting named on the podcast. And I would say, like, rip your DMs.

[B]

Say it right before, like you're on top of them, knife to throw and say that to them.

[A]

And I will have that.

[B]

And then you say, Shiesta McGuire.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. Click it. I think it should record. Did I put batteries?

[A]

Yeah. No, we didn't.

[B]

I love the, like the little bunny snitch. But she did take down a corruption.

[A]

Government from the top.

[B]

That's why. And you know, Neo Noir, what a year for Neo Noir.

[A]

Speaking of calling people out on things.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

One of my friends in London was hanging out with someone who was talking about the podcast Loving Ride. And then he was like, it just sucks because I heard Mary Beth Varrone is like a massive bitch. Didn't know that or didn't know that. I was friends with the person that he was talking to.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And she was like, who did you hear that from? And he was like, oh, I heard it from like someone that knows her ex boyfriend. And she was like, edward, they're like good friends.

[B]

Yeah. What?

[A]

And she found out who the person was. And I only met her a couple times, but I just think it's funny. Like, if you listen to the podcast, you should know that I'm not that also. If that's the rumor, then, like, I must have made it, because all great women, of course, are talked about in that way.

[B]

Yeah, of course. All the greats.

[A]

A massive bitch.

[B]

What's always so funny to me sometimes to, like, gay guys, they'll talk about, like, divas on set, and they say all the things they did, and I'm like, oh, am I supposed to not be. Try not to say mother challenge. No, I know I'm seated. And by the way, when people think that about you, or if they come to me and they're like, does Mary Beth hate me? I'm like, you don't know yet that she's a delicate baby chihuahua ballerina princess.

[A]

I am. And that's the energy I'm bringing. But also, it's like, no, probably not. There's very few people I hate. I mean, I have the list of enemies in my notes app that I'll read every single name, first and last. In the last season of Ride.

[B]

What do you say about me?

[A]

Oh, he's like, she's amazing. I guess he hadn't heard any rumors about you.

[B]

No, no, there's no rumors about me.

[A]

You didn't know the person that he knew.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah. I. I have to just say, like, careful, I guess. Careful.

[B]

I'm glad you could say it, because.

[A]

I. I could be one. You have no idea what I'm capable of.

[B]

I don't know if I could.

[A]

I wish you didn't think I could do this. Universal you. I know that. You knew that.

[B]

Yeah, exactly. I was about to say no. I've seen the vision since the very first time I saw you. Sweet baby angel princess. But, yeah, I'm a protect. And I'm attack.

[A]

I'm just tired, I think.

[B]

Anything else?

[A]

Um. Is there anything else pressing that needs to be said this week?

[B]

Well, I'm drinking a Maison Perrier Ultimate. Oh, wait, this. I guess it's.

[A]

You want to talk about dinner in la? And the waitress said, there's a water program. And you ordered an 18 sparkling water.

[B]

Oh, my God. So this happened. It was so crazy. I'm at this dinner, and I'm like, yeah, could I get a sparkling water? And I think this is the moment I knew I probably shouldn't live in LA anymore, but, you know, I still was. But she goes, we have a water program.

[A]

Totally.

[B]

And I was like, and.

[A]

And by the way, totally.

[B]

Yeah. And I said, great. I mean, how cool is that? I've watched people try wines for years. I'd love to have, you know, you come over and splash. And I smell it and. And chug. So I say, of course. And I was like, if you have a wreck, like, what? You know. And she's like, well, what do you like? And I'm like, girl, where do we start?

[A]

Right?

[B]

She verse. And then so I was like, I love it really spicy. Like, I want it, you know, searing my esophagus. She brings out this water and it was, I found out later, was $18 money well spent. Happy to do it.

[A]

And it's the tariffs.

[B]

It's the tariffs. Of course. It tasted fully like the Dead Sea. It was like the saltiest fucking.

[A]

You wanted spicy.

[B]

I said, yeah, but I didn't say I wanted, like, sodia. It was crazy how. How salty it was.

[A]

But did you drink it?

[B]

I did. I finished the whole thing. Because she kept coming back and asking how it was. She never asked how the food was. It just was this water. And that's what I love about la. And so stories like this and experiences like this are why I think I'm a great catch and someone to watch. I think a newcomer.

[A]

One to watch.

[B]

I'm the one to watch and a one to watch.

[A]

It's 18 water. We have a podcast and you don't. So should we gonna know what we ride for?

[B]

Yeah. So today in our little spooktober haunted hayride, I'm gonna be riding for corn.

[A]

Mazes and I'm gonna be riding for screenshots.

[B]

We tried to watch a horror movie the other night. An hour in where like, nothing could scare us at this point. Off. And then turn it off.

[A]

Maybe, hey, maybe next year straight.

[B]

We'll see. We go, that's all you've got. And then we cut.

[A]

Show me something.

[B]

Then we kiss.

[A]

Show me something.

[B]

Show me something. You want sex with me?

[A]

Well, then come talk to me.

[B]

Clip that. Wait, you're obsessed with us today. I want to be looked at the way you're looking at me.

[A]

I know.

[B]

I'm serious.

[A]

This is setting a high bar for the night.

[B]

Do you know what I mean?

[A]

Someone 5pm we never record at this time, so we're feeling extra crazy.

[B]

Well, it's right after dark. It's.

[A]

It's right after dark.

[B]

This is interesting with the hands out.

[A]

Yeah, but it's fine. It's like, just use your imagination. First of all, just want to tell everyone that we are not in the submersible for the first time in a long time. Last week, I did ads from my bed.

[B]

Someone asked if I was at a water park for one. I'm not kidding.

[A]

I've done them outside.

[B]

What I want to talk about is bonza. It's very Monica Barbaretto.

[A]

It's very bonza. Makes better for you. Versions of comfort foods. Pasta, pizza, Mac and cheese, and waffles, all made from chickpeas and are gluten free. So that's like, so my vibe.

[B]

Yeah. And their mission is to inspire people to eat more chickpeas. Me, if that means. And other beans, which we have to improving human health and the environment. So I had this crazy bonza experience where my niece was eating bonza pasta. And you know when your niece or nephews are eating something and you're like, well, I'm finishing that 100%. And so I just, I was like, more another bite for drama. I'm a bons ahead.

[A]

Well, let's face it. And we talked about this on the pod before, gluten free pasta has a problem, Right? Like you've said, it's a sponge. It goes soft too soon, it falls apart under pressure, and it can leave you feeling unsatisfied. You know what I mean? It's just like not good for the table. Bonza. You know the brand that gave us the first chickpea pasta in that gorgeous orange box. Oh, my God. Has discovered.

[B]

Is it Hermes? No, it's Bonza.

[A]

Introducing Bonza brown rice pasta. The first gluten free pasta that never goes limp. It's firm when you need it to be.

[B]

Flaccid ass pasta. Yeah.

[A]

Even after round two of cold pasta leftovers from the fridge, it holds up.

[B]

In hot and steamy situations like soup season.

[A]

Come on, Kerplunk.

[B]

Come on, Kerplunk. And leaves you satisfied for days on end.

[A]

It's made with just two simple ingredients, brown rice and chickpeas. And it tastes exactly like classic pasta. So if you've been let down by gluten free noodles before, talk to your taste buds about switching to brown rice pasta. Visit eat bonza.com and use code ride at checkout for 50% off your first purchase of pasta or Mac and cheese. That's E a T b a n za.com and use code RIDE for 50% off your first order of pasta or Mac and cheese. This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all in one website platform for entrepreneurs like me to stand out and succeed online. Whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand, Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website, engage with your audience, and sell anything from products to content to time, all in one place. All Your terms.

[B]

So do you mind if I just, I want to say like three product features if we have time, if that's absolutely okay. So my favorite product features, if I had to say it would be, I think Squarespace Payments, because Squarespace Payments is the easiest way. You love money, of course, and so do you. Squarespace Payments is the easiest way to manage your payments in one place. With Squarespace, onboarding is fast and simple. You get started in just a few clicks and start receiving payments right away. Plus give your customers more ways to pay. With popular payment methods like Klarna, ACH Direct Debit us, Apple Pay, afterpay us, CA and Clearpay uk, you can also.

[A]

Connect social and multimedia accounts. Now, I don't want to jump the gun here, but I would say if you Want to check marybethborough and.com in about two weeks, you might see some important information on there. Literally. I can plug in my bands in town and I put all my shows and bands in town and they show up directly on my website. You can also use SEO tools to get discovered fast. Every Squarespace website is optimized to be indexed with meta descriptions, an auto generated sitemap, and more. So you show up more often in global search. Go to squarespace.com for a free trial and when you're Ready to launch squarespace.com ride to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

[B]

Squarespace. Your family dude Support means the world. Your family dude.

[A]

By now you've probably heard of Bilt because we talk about it all the time.

[B]

Yeah, we're always yapping about builds where.

[A]

You can earn points on your monthly rent payment. But did you know they make it possible for you to get more outside of your home too? If you're paying rent every month without earning anything in return. Let us introduce you to bilt, the rewards program designed for renters. Me who want to earn something for their largest monthly expense. Let me explain.

[B]

Well, I'll just take it away.

[A]

Yeah, why don't you? Because my. My voice is kind of.

[B]

I agree. Okay, so nobody wants to pay rent, right? But if you have to, Built makes it worth it. Built is revolutionizing how millions think about paying rent by rewarding their members with points and exclusive benefits around your neighborhood.

[A]

By paying rent through Built, you earn flexible points that can be redeemed towards hundreds of hotels and airlines, a future rent payment, your next lift ride, and more. But it doesn't stop there. BILT is about making your entire neighborhood more rewarding. You can dine at Your favorite local restaurants and earn additional points, get VIP treatment at certain fitness studios and enjoy exclusive experiences just for Built members every month.

[B]

Bill is turning a monthly expense. I'll pop in here. I'm good now. Bill is turning a monthly expense into an opportunity to earn rewards and discover the best that your neighborhood has to offer. Your rent is finally working for you, Cad. Earn points on rent and around your neighborhood, wherever you call home, by going to join built.com ride. That's J O I N B I L T.com ride that's join built.com ride. Make sure to use our URL so they know we sent you.

[A]

Wait, where are we going?

[B]

Who cares? Ride.

[A]

So do you want to go first or should I?

[B]

I would love to go first, if that's okay. Just because I think at any point I might just, like, die out.

[A]

Yeah, let's get this on the record before he passes away.

[B]

That would be forehead to table, you know.

[A]

Well, nose really would hit first.

[B]

Oh, yeah, of course, My muzzle. So here's the thing. Corn mazes. I grew up in Idaho, so of course I'm familiar with corn mazes.

[A]

I've never done one, for what it's.

[B]

Worth, you know, I can't see it's. It leans escape room. But I'm going to tell you why it's not and why it's more active for me.

[A]

I go, no, I'm good.

[B]

No, I get it.

[A]

And I think, I don't die for them. It's just something I wouldn't need to experience.

[B]

Well, exactly. Sometimes with a lot of false stuff, I love, like, the concept of it. But then if I'm actually at a pumpkin patch, like, waiting in line to, like, carry a pumpkin has dirt all over it, I'm like, I didn't love this.

[A]

Well, when you have a bad sense of direction, anything can be a corn maze. Getting from point A to point B.

[B]

Have we talked about the fact that I randomly have a good sense of direction and it shocks people?

[A]

It's crazy. Mine, Honestly, it's worse than anyone I know. I have the worst sense of direction of anyone I know. If I have a choice to go the right way or the wrong way, every single time I'm going the wrong way, sometimes even after I've been told how to get there.

[B]

Say that again.

[A]

Also, I don't know right from left. And I know a lot of people. This is going to resonate with them because I just don't know. Can you point, please? And don't give me the right left. Okay.

[B]

Can we stop being so hard on real fast.

[A]

It's all relative.

[B]

No, exactly. You don't want to know what's going on with my Mad Hatter.

[A]

Oh, sorry. I don't have time for that. I'm trying to, like, literally heal the world. Oh, sorry.

[B]

Maybe, you know. Laughter. Yes.

[A]

So you're not busy? You know, if I'm right. Oh, so you're not busy.

[B]

Everyone giving me such a hard time. I'm like, hit me. Lately. I'm just like, hit me.

[A]

Because.

[B]

Yeah, I'm literally like, your other left. I'm like, oh, I've never done something like that to somebody. Your other left. Oh, okay.

[A]

Don't fart.

[B]

No, I'm not gonna. Oh, my tail came off. I was gonna show my tail.

[A]

Sit down.

[B]

I love that you think I was gonna fart. All right.

[A]

Talk about. Speak on it.

[B]

So, corn mazes. So in Idaho, there was this place you could. Well, there were a bunch of corn.

[A]

Mazes, but I'm looking in the monitor, and it's just so insane. Sorry. Go on. So no, baby, there's a corn maze in Idaho.

[B]

Well, there's a lot. I'm the corn maze. I. So it was kind of the thing to do in middle school. You go to the corn mazes, and it's where you hold someone's hand for the first time.

[A]

Totally.

[B]

And that was.

[A]

That must be a cool thing to do.

[B]

I really loved that whole era. And I think I've talked about this. It was so cool once I started hooking up with men, because I was like, oh, this is why everyone was so, like, gagged for all this stuff.

[A]

Because you're with someone that you're attracted.

[B]

To because you are, like, you know, you get little butterflies. You have that. That bed cam, if you will. But I had a girlfriend in, like, seventh grade, I think seventh or eighth. I was definitely pulling at the time. And I just remember these corn mazes. Your mom drops you off. You've got new Abercrombie jeans on a North Face. Like fleece.

[A]

Totally.

[B]

You're kind of like bangs in front, and you have, like, acne. But it hasn't really gotten to a point where it could be, like, debilitating. It's more kind of like a.

[A]

And it will. But hasn't gotten.

[B]

It might even consume your life for a couple years or 20. And then you go into this corn maze, and you delicately hold the hand of a girl that reeks of a perfume.

[A]

You can. My apple.

[B]

Yeah, no, literally. Or like, Daisy by Marc Jacobs. If she's Filthy fucking rich and flower bomb. Have you ever heard of Vera Wang?

[A]

Princess Flower bomb.

[B]

Flower bomb. You smell like flower bomb right now.

[A]

Yeah, there's an aura.

[B]

Ms. Judy Hopps got that flower bomb, baby.

[A]

Oh my God.

[B]

Oh my God.

[A]

Oh my God.

[B]

Oh fuck. So that is so the fox in Zootopia. Oh fuck. That's gonna be good. And right out of context.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I just loved it. It was like the. You know. And I love fall. I love a fall fest. I love the brisk, you know, little crispy weather. I love all the food. I love a funnel cake. I love an apple c cider. And then sometimes people would bring like a Red Bull and it was like. We're getting crazy.

[A]

You're getting crunk. Yeah.

[B]

But here's the thing about corn maze is they teach you about life. There could be something terrifying around any corner. You're probably going to make a lot of mistakes. But at the end of the day it's maybe not that big of a deal. And it's.

[A]

At the end of the day you're going to be holding hands with a woman who smells really good.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

And you're going to get through it together.

[B]

No wonder I loved it so much. And I just. I've been wanting to do one recently because it's just like. I don't know, it's fun in theory and then I. As long as it's not too tall, I want to be able to jump up so I can see. But you know, seeing it in Saltburn, I was like, you know, part of me wants to.

[A]

Totally thinking about that.

[B]

Wants to get back in.

[A]

And in Harry Potter of course. Fuck you, jk. Fuck.

[B]

Clearly fuck you jk.

[A]

There was sort of an iconic one in that.

[B]

Well, yeah, definitely.

[A]

There's a really diggory.

[B]

Cedric. Diggory.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. Glad I know that.

[A]

I'm glad you know that too.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. Well I. He was huge for me. I mean Robert Pattinson. Yeah, Robert Pattinson and Daniel Radcliffe and Equus. Like that was. You know, it was a good time. I don't know.

[A]

I was in Orlando Bloomin. Pirate, pirates type of gal.

[B]

So funny, you know.

[A]

And I felt like by that measure Akira Knightley and pirates.

[B]

Yeah. Women were so fixated on Orlando. He no hate to Orlando. It just. He never came around my. My parts.

[A]

It for me was monumental.

[B]

I can't wait for him to see this.

[A]

Anyone that watched the Pirates. I think I've said this on the podcast before but anyone who watched the second DVD in the Pirates of the Caribbean DVD pack where had special features in like a little documentary. They're bisexual now.

[B]

I agree with that. Kira is like corset and kind of like titch to the chin, so she was so good. I do remember in Troy there are definitely three types of people in the world.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

There's the Brads, the Orlando's, and then there's the Eric Banas. Whoa, you're talking. You're talking to an Eric Bana girl.

[A]

Yeah, and that doesn't surprise me.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yeah. I mean, think about the aesthetics. Yeah, there's an aesthetic there.

[B]

There is an aesthetic there. I really just. Eric Bana was huge for me and I was so sad when he died. I was like, oh, my God. He like, yeah, well, the character. Yes. So Eric Bennett is alive, by the way, but corn mazes. I. Yeah, I just felt like it was. It was a place to meet and I. I haven't done one in a while, but I'm sure I would still maybe with it.

[A]

But I bet we could find one in Connecticut.

[B]

I think so too. And I like the scary ones. Like, I like when people jump out. I kind of love that feeling of like someone like spooking me and I kind of jump. I don't jump that much. So jumpy for some reason, I'm kind of like. I'm a little bit stoic and I like going first. I'm kind of like, no, I can do it.

[A]

Something that Edward and I used to have friction over. And it was irrational on both sides.

[B]

Was like, well, because you were a bitch.

[A]

Well, I mean, massive bitch. But I would be in the house with him and I would know he was there. But then when he would come in the room, I would jump and he'd be like. So it's irrational of me to jump because I know someone else in the house. Like, who else could it be? But then he would be like, you're so jumpy. And I'm like, but that's like, I can't control that.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, you still are. I love you. Ah. Like. Well, you know when my shower kicked your ass? That's my favorite.

[A]

It was the picture in the bathroom. The picture looking through this frosted glass shower. And there's a photo of the back of a man's head at the same height that a man would be. And I turn it.

[B]

No, I literally said, hey, we okay in there, girl? Everything all right? I thought the water pressure kicked your ass. I'm good. All good, sis.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

Thank you, diva. But I. I just strongly urge, you know, Go to. Oh, thanks, sweetie.

[A]

You're hitting it and you can't feel it because it's.

[B]

I can't feel anything. I know, by the way.

[A]

I know.

[B]

But I would really strongly urge anyone who's going through a spooky time or not even go into a corn maze and lose yourself.

[A]

Think about life.

[B]

Left, right. Who gives a. Just have a little fun. Dance around.

[A]

Hey, it's all Greek to me.

[B]

Get in there and lose your mind.

[A]

Yeah, crazy.

[B]

But I love, like being chased after a guy with a chainsaw and. And yeah, maybe it would electrify me and kind of bring me back to life in a way. So why not? Maybe I'll go do that with you and hold your hand and I love being a little chilly in them. And I love. Just. Fall is so delicious to me. Not just because of my. My birthday or. I just think it's the best. It's the best season.

[A]

It's horny girl autumn, too. I declared that many weeks ago. So let us know how you're celebrating.

[B]

I think you're doing good. I'm excited for you. Can I just say that makes fun of us.

[A]

Look at this. I like that you're sort of using a corn maze as a metaphor. I love that there's going to be.

[B]

A lot of metaphors.

[A]

I don't want to get into Ride or Die yet, but.

[B]

Yeah, no, I know. I'm excited for you to talk more about that, but. Yeah, I guess I think that's all I wanted to say. I just think a good corn maze go back to the American tradition of the corn maze. I'm sure we stole it from someone else, but I'm sure we stole it. To me, it might be German. Who knows?

[A]

And of course, harkens back to interstellar corn crops.

[B]

Do you understand? There's a circle.

[A]

Everything. I mean, it's the last okra ever. Do you get that?

[B]

Now would be a really good time for you to come home.

[A]

No, it would be a really good time for you to come back now.

[B]

That's what you said to me. And so I said, fine, I'll move back to New York City.

[A]

And thank you.

[B]

New York City is so good to me. Today is my birthday and we are the same.

[A]

You said we might be the same age. Well, today's my birthday and I'm gonna go kiss Topher Grace on the mouth. Blue Crush is on Netflix. The scene in Blue Crush when they're on the Jet Ski and she's surfing out in the big waves. And it's. We Are. We are the youth of the nation. We are. I watched that scene. I could lift a car. Fabulous movie. Oh. Oh, I'm so glad I thought of this. Despite the fact that Ann Marie's mother left their family, she has a secure attachment style. She's known this guy for two days. She has a fight with her best friend, shows up to his hotel room crying, not doubting for one single second that he's going to welcome her in with open arms. Warner, he supports her. He gives her a sports analogy about his first game when he got hit really hard. Tells her to, you know, get back out there on the waves. He shows up to the tournament, he's a total fucking king.

[B]

I know.

[A]

I'm like, more of that.

[B]

They got to make him more like that guy in that movie.

[A]

Please. But I will say an NFL player who's. He steps up.

[B]

Of course. How else are you going to write him?

[A]

Come on.

[B]

The best is anytime a big wave hits me. It's every now and then. I wouldn't say a lot, but when they do, I can't help but just immediately romanticize it as her at the bottom. And I'm hoping my head will hit a rock lightly. Just. I want a light concussion. But there's something about that where. Oh, God, that movie does huge numbers for me. And I love that her eyes are. What's it called when you have two different color eyes?

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

That could never be something we know.

[A]

It would never be something we would know.

[B]

We would never not come to dinner.

[A]

We would never not come to dinner.

[B]

I would never not go to a corn maze. I really think if someone invited me, I'd be like, of course I'm coming. I'm. Well, now it kind of goes without saying, like, I'm bringing you. And I did say I saw was somebody sent me this thing that was on the ride Reddit where it was like. I will say I thought something was going wrong because Benny and Mary Beth were spending time together and like, almost like supporting through a tough time.

[A]

Yeah. In a sort of like, we're going through the corn maze of life type of way. Left, right, doesn't matter. As long as I'm with you. And say that your other left.

[B]

Yeah. So I'm here to talk about Jones Road, which is from Bobby Brown. It's her brand.

[A]

The Bobbi Brown.

[B]

The Bobbi Brown. They sent me this miracle bomb and it's this delicious little tintillating kind of bronzer blush thing. And oh, my God, I put a little bit on My face, it looked like I went to the freaking.

[A]

The Maldives.

[B]

I went to the mall. That's so funny you say Maldives. The thing that came in my head was Maldives. I thought it was absolutely fabulous. I'm dying to put it on your cheeky sisses.

[A]

We're gonna do that tonight before we go to dinner.

[B]

Oh, great. Okay. Yeah, great.

[A]

Well. Jones Road Beauty is a minimalist makeup brand founded by makeup artist Bobby Brown. As you mentioned, that creates versatile and easy to use products that simplify your routine. It's clean makeup that actually performs.

[B]

Jones Road products enhance what makes you you rather than covering up.

[A]

That's so my vibe lately. Minimal coverage.

[B]

I agree. And it's very cutesy. Like everything they have, it's that kind of like, sun kissed. Very healthy. It's like balmy. I don't know.

[A]

Well, their best sellers, Miracle Balm, Jones Road also has a full lineup of effortless skin first staples. Like, they're just enough tinted moisturizer. A lightweight formula that smooths and even skin tone with a soft touch of coverage. I feel like the package probably got there since I've been in LA and I can't wait to use this. It hides redness, looks natural, and feels like nothing on your skin. And that's all a girl wants.

[B]

Can I say something, babe? My miracle bomb is your miracle bomb. You don't need to worry about a package coming to yours. Okay.

[A]

Skin friendly ingredients to keep skin moisturized without clogging pores.

[B]

I know it's not comedogenic, which, like, if I hear those words, oh, chills down my back. So modern day makeup that's clean, strategic, and multifunctional for effortless routines. For a limited time, our listeners are getting a free cool gloss on their first park chest when they use Code Ride at checkout. Just head to Jonesroadbeauty.com and use code Ride at checkout. After you purchase, they will ask you where you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them our show sent you.

[A]

I bet you're wondering why a company like ThirdLove would advertise on a podcast with two people with no boobs. And yet here we are.

[B]

Here's the thing. ThirdLove makes better bras, period. Founded by women who were sick of settling for bras that were good enough. Yeah, Fucking right.

[A]

Made with the highest quality materials to solve fit issues that many of us face. I mean, there's so many ways that a bra can, like, totally fudge your shit up. Like if it's too tight in the back. If the straps are too tight, it feels heavy. It feels tight. It's squeezing the skin.

[B]

Wait. Want to know something so insane?

[A]

I was your mammogram.

[B]

Well, that. But also I was so worried about not knowing how to do a bra thing because in movies and stuff it was like, what, have you never done it before? So I took one of my sister's bras and I practiced how to do the clasp. Isn't that so sad?

[A]

I love what we've done with the place. With the place.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And you know exactly what I mean by that.

[B]

Well, you can get extra lift, you can smooth out back spillage and more with third love.

[A]

Third love. Available in 60 plus sizes to fit. Double A me to H me. Third love does it all. And stop settling for average bras. Get solutions made for your body.

[B]

Get 15 off your [e-mail] with code podcast15.

[A]

Did you know Third Love has 10 plus years of redefining what a comfortable bra looks and feels like? Designed with the highest quality materials, including innovative thermoregulation. And they invented half cup sizes for those who are in between sizes.

[B]

With the ammonium thyglo and half loop.

[A]

Top stitching on the hem.

[B]

You've got the wrong girl.

[A]

Low viscosity rayon. Seriously, stop settling for average bras. Get 15% off your first [e-mail] with Code Podcast 15. Thank you, Third Love.

[B]

Holy shit. I love K18.

[A]

Do you ever wonder why the Baronis that come up and say hi to us always have perfect hair?

[B]

K18. It's K18 and I love the name of it. I don't know why it's like K18. I love the bottles. There was this K18 leave in conditioner that I used on set because like, obviously I was frying my hair to a certain point. It's getting it done every day and my God, was it delicious.

[A]

Well, the secret to keeping your hair looking like total Perfection is the K18 molecular repair hair mask. Women and stuff. Stem. What if you could bleach and color your hair without damage? The K18 Molecular Repair Hair mask isn't just a damage cover up, it's a deep damage fix.

[B]

Well, do you want to know why?

[A]

Why? Tell me.

[B]

Well, of course, sweetheart. So it says patented K18 peptide. It actually repairs damage on the molecular level, which is really, really goddamn deep.

[A]

In just four minutes I got stronger, smoother, softer, bouncier hair. Like new. No matter what I put it through.

[B]

I will just like dead ass. Take the ad out, strip everything away from us. Your Hair looks gorgeous.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

It really looks so healthy. And you dyed it for a whole.

[A]

Year, blowing it out every day.

[B]

Daddy made you diet for a whole year, and it's gorgeous.

[A]

We've put my hair through a lot. We together. Bleach, color, heat, hairspray, you name it. So I guess what I'm saying is you'd be a fool to not order K18. And you can find K18 at your local Sephora and feel the difference for yourself. Or try it 10% off your first purchase at k18hair.com. That's code [e-mail]. Anything else to say on it, baby girl?

[B]

So for me, it's just like, there's kind of not a K18 product that I don't think is fire. And if it's in someone's shower and I'm in their house, like, yeah, I'm like, as many. As many dollops of it as I can. I think it's fabulous. And you know what? And I'll always say this. When you get your haircut somewhere, the brands they have at the salons speak volume K18 is always on the shelf.

[A]

Thank you, Kate.

[B]

Katie's been that girl, and she will remain that girl. Katie, we love you to death.

[A]

So screenshots. I mean, okay.

[B]

Oh, I literally just got tingles from shots.

[A]

Let's just take it way back to, you know, cell phones. Cell phones are hitting the market. We're not even aware of the capabilities that they will have down the line. Right. We're texting, we're calling. There's not that much it can do. Eventually, we're taking pictures of things outside ourselves.

[B]

Unless you add an lgnv. Because I was doing CR on that.

[A]

Well, yeah. As technology advances, as it's want to do.

[B]

Yes, we do.

[A]

We move into this technology where you simply press two buttons and you're a photographer, you can capture what's on the screen. The way that they didn't know how single women would use this feature to garner support, to propagandize, to overanalyze, to just build community.

[B]

I mean, we send each other. Please. I'm gonna piss myself.

[A]

A thousand screenshots a day.

[B]

Thousand screenshots a day. I can't. I literally can't open an app without being like, what do you think? Like, well, how could.

[A]

We would never not send each other a screenshot. What are you gonna do? Describe it to me, honey, let's see it.

[B]

I want to see how it's worded.

[A]

How many messages was it? I need to see punctuation, I need to see capitalization, I need to see emojis. Sorry, I'm not getting the full picture.

[B]

Honey, I need to see what time of day. Oh, oh, I gotta see what time.

[A]

Of day 100% now. Screenshots can be so scary when you really consider the fact that almost anything you send can be screenshot. Except if you're in I guess Snapchat and or on Instagram DM when it's view. Once everything's public, just consider this.

[B]

Yes. I can't wait.

[A]

Consider this. When I had Raya, this was many, many years ago and I found someone on there and I couldn't screenshot. So I opened photo booth on my computer. I flipped the phone. Three, two, one, snap. I got the picture. Now I never really send it to anyone. It was just so I could have it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know. Oh, so right. You can't screenshot either. But I'm not on that app anymore, so that's not part of my life.

[B]

But I like if you were on there, I'd be like send me everything about the guide. Like, but you have to have your phone.

[A]

Well, ye. Yeah, I mean which you will now that our screenshots will certainly decline now that we are going to live in the same city. But my screenshots folder, not only just things like that. Conversations.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's memes. It's important moments in videos. It's. It's things I've seen that just totally want me over. And I said I need that forever.

[B]

Of course. What's my favorite one lately?

[A]

I don't care if it's a strap. I say nut in me.

[B]

Yeah, that was a screenshot. Had to have it. Let me actually look through some. Let's share some.

[A]

I wanted to share some, but I just think like yeah, your screenshots folder. I mean it should be hidden. Like I want to use face ID to have to open it. Does that make sense? I don't think anyone that has my phone should have access to this.

[B]

Here's my thing. It's like if you have my phone, like let her rip.

[A]

I have a lot of screenshots of dms, both positive and negative.

[B]

Okay, let's see what I've got. I have some merch. I'll flash it quickly.

[A]

Careful now.

[B]

Okay. Okay. A lot of. Yeah, I mean it's a lot of. A lot of conversation.

[A]

It's a comment I got on one of my stand up videos. Timu Taylor Swift.

[B]

Oh, I love that.

[A]

Timu Taylor.

[B]

Oh, this one says love you Benito. Greetings from. It's Chile. But I thought they said ciao.

[A]

Oh, I have Biden's trusted messengers. When Fox News put you up.

[B]

Oh, my God, that was the best.

[A]

I have a lot of images of people tagging me in. Photos of people that I look like, both positive and negative. And eventually I will post another dump of that. I have the meme of, I'm having a bad day. This girl's texting, and then the guy is thinking, when will this bitch have a good day? But instead he writes back, what's wrong?

[B]

That's me.

[A]

Yeah. But also me in a lot of ways.

[B]

Oh, wait, I have this one. It's I want to be adored by millions, perceived by none, and love touched on by one special boy. Is that so crazy. Sent that to you, obviously.

[A]

Well, of course. I had the screenshot of when I saw Pinky on the grid of all the dogs they had, and she just had so much attitude. And I said, I need that one. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I have this Alec Baldwin tweet. Where is it? He tweeted this in I don't know what year. Starbucks on 93rd and Broadway. Uptight queen barista named Jay has an attitude problem. If that ain't you.

[B]

Oh, that's so me. Oh, this is. Wait, this is true. Zootopia 2 will have a much darker tone and a few characters will actually die. I have a screenshot of your text, and it says, it's amazing. You said, why is that mesmerizing? I said, it's good. Right? I don't know what that was about. And you said, it's amazing. A completely intoxicated man just told me his parents beat him as a child and his engagement ended three days ago. And he asked me to have dinner with him tonight. So that's my big update for the day.

[A]

So that.

[B]

Not laughing about his abuse. I'm just like, that.

[A]

No, that was a crazy thing that had happened to me.

[B]

Yeah. He did then stalk her. So I don't really.

[A]

We're not going to get into it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But my screenshots. I have a lot of. When yassifying was a big trend, I have a lot of my friends yassified.

[B]

Oh, when everyone made the Vogue covers, this was that. Oh, so I love.

[A]

That was huge.

[B]

When you guys love graphic design, it's just. It makes me so proud.

[A]

I mean. Yeah, it just doesn't get much better than my screenshots folder. Oh. I actually have this iconic Rachel Senate Instagram story. She did questions. The question was My girlfriend just soft launch me. Do I soft launch back or full post? And her response is full post. I think guys should post their girlfriend constantly or nothing at all. And girls should post photos of themselves and then maybe on his birthday, the back of his head. But that's just me.

[B]

That's perfect.

[A]

I mean, that should be taught in schools.

[B]

I agree.

[A]

Yeah. You would be lucky to take a laugh around my screenshots folder.

[B]

Oh, I love this one. George Clooney says, I don't give a if people think I only play myself on screen. So I obviously screenshotted that and had to send to you.

[A]

So, yeah, I guess share. You know what? Today this is for the Baronies. A fun little thing. Go through your screenshots and just post your favorite one to story so much.

[B]

Baroni HQ as well. Yeah, it's also just fun because it's like you don't want to go through the rigmarole of like doing all the things or looking up the person or saving it or it's just like. Just screenshot it, dude.

[A]

Screenshot it. Also, it's cool in photos if you use the magnifying glass to search if the meme or. Or screenshot you're looking for has a word in it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You could just look up the word and it'll come right up.

[B]

How cool is that?

[A]

Pretty awesome. Like Victoria Beckham saying, I have never read a book in my life that's in my screenshots. You can look up that anytime, anywhere, on any. Any sort of browser situation. So I love screenshots and. Yeah, but there is a spooky side which is that, like, someone might be doing it. Screenshot they. Screenshot they can too.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Equal opportunity.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I think screenshots should be used for good and not evil.

[B]

I agree. Unless you're proving a point, which I think is good.

[A]

Or unless you're in the right.

[B]

I guess again, good. I need that to record for you in the writers room.

[A]

Yeah, totally.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So, yeah, I think like, screenshot early and often. Have fun with it. Share it with your friends. And yeah, there's just like. It's just a fun thing for girls to do. Guys shouldn't screenshot. I don't think. No, I don't know what the purpose would be of that.

[B]

Well, you're not.

[A]

And here's what I will say. I don't think they are like, I don't think guys are screenshotting. I really don't. I think they don't care about anything.

[B]

No, I'm really finding that, too. I'm like, wait, give me your phone. And actually, we were with a straight guy recently, and I saw. He was like, don't swipe on my phone. And I just saw. It was just kind of like memes and stuff. Like, there was nothing. They are screenshotting memes. I do believe things that make straight.

[A]

Guys with social anxiety. I'm like, maybe you should have sex. Get. Blow off some steam.

[B]

I don't want to get in the way. I just wanted that clean, so I don't want to say anything. I just wanted that line clean. That was perfect. I just. I can only amplify. I agree.

[A]

I know why you're so tense, baby.

[B]

What?

[A]

You need to have sex.

[B]

Yeah, put her there.

[A]

So I guess let's get into Ride or Die.

[B]

As I said, like, sex with us is imminent at this point.

[A]

If you want to have sex with.

[B]

Me, come talk to me. Come podcast with me.

[A]

Us having all my crushes on as guests.

[B]

You want sex with me?

[A]

Come, Cody.

[B]

Come pot with me.

[A]

We have to go.

[B]

Totally.

[A]

You know what you are, Benny? Your words, not mine, babe. You're my ride or die.

[B]

Ride or Die. I, of course, ride for Screenshots. I sing.

[A]

I mean, my God, it's like you're working for them or something.

[B]

It's like, oh, my God, you work.

[A]

For the Big Screenshot.

[B]

Yeah, I do work for Big Screenshot. I work for Big Screenshot. I love it. I have to send Mary Beth so many a day, she has to check all my work. It's just important. I don't know what to tell you.

[A]

But also, I shouldn't be giving advice to anyone. I want to be on the record saying that I. I should. I should not be.

[B]

I think I should.

[A]

It's tough. I'm like, why is my life where it's at?

[B]

Look at you. Wait, no, put them down back the other way because it's so cute. It looks like. Oh, my God, look at her. Get this. Quiet. I'm. I'm not going to say what I'm doing. You're going to have to just watch. Like, isn't that crazy? I don't know. Freeze. You have my support and none of my judgment. So here's the thing. Yeah, I ride for him. Yeah. I might do them too much. And, yeah, when you send me stuff, Mary Beth's probably seeing it, but she.

[A]

Also knows I'm definitely seeing it.

[B]

Yeah, you're seeing it.

[A]

100 meanwhile. Yeah, everything you send Benny, I'm seeing. I don't show you everything because I want to save you from disappointment. And I do think people are just out here, they're just fumbling.

[B]

They don't disappoint me as much.

[A]

Yeah, I don't want people to disappoint you. I had to keep a big secret from you before the overcompensating premiere. And I did. And I told you after because I knew if I told you before, you'd get upset.

[B]

Wait, I don't even know what it was.

[A]

Tell you later. I'll remind you.

[B]

Yeah, I don't even see it just.

[A]

But yeah, it just rolled off right off your back.

[B]

I just live in little Benny world.

[A]

I just wish that, like, I don't know. I have some stuff I need to figure out.

[B]

Well, I've been doing talk therapy lately and it's been amazing.

[A]

This earlook is so cunt.

[B]

Yeah, no, I know.

[A]

I mean, I look cute.

[B]

I'm telling you, it's getting to that.

[A]

Time of day where gorgeous.

[B]

Wait, what is it?

[A]

It's the crime to be gorgeous.

[B]

It's a crime to be gorgeous. Gorgeous. Gorgeous. Oh, I have to say one thing about that was so funny. Last night. Mary Beth and I were out getting drinks. If you.

[A]

Oh, and by the way, I'm 25 again. I'm doing all the same I did when I was 25. I never ever thought I would be back here.

[B]

Me too.

[A]

And can I just say one thing? I'm having a lot of fun.

[B]

You didn't think you'd be back here? I didn't think I'd be back.

[A]

A lot of fun.

[B]

Here I am and I'm literally like moving my hips and then I'm having fun. I looked at the clock last night.

[A]

I hope you're enjoying the Instagram stories, you guys, because, like, we have fun with them. And like, I do think that people lose sight of the fact that, like, Instagram stories should be fun. And like, we're just having fun. I hope you're screenshotting them and sending them to people and saying, oh my God, this is so funny.

[B]

Well, it's funny. I could be more private. But like, why? It's just funny. I'm out with my girl and like, she put blush on.

[A]

I'm like, so wait, what happened last night that was funny?

[B]

Well, it was so funny cuz at one point I looked for my phone. I was like, where is it? And Mary Beth just fully was going through all my stuff. Like you. You just had it and it was as if it was your phone.

[A]

And I was radical transparency.

[B]

Well, I know, it was just. But it was fun to see like my phone with it's like through someone else's eyes. It's auntie like it just got to like spend the day with you and just like you just reviewed everything. You saw everything.

[A]

And I'm finding out stuff you probably didn't think I ever would. Universal you. Well, like my friends fucking my exes. And then sometimes I'll just see people's phones or they'll tell me things and I'm just like. Well, that's probably something that person didn't think I would ever hear. And yet here we are. And I'm here. And I'm your wife and I'm sexual and I love you.

[B]

For some reason, I have fallen in love with you during this episode more than I ever. Yeah, I will say though, all you fucking Fargots are trying so hard to be Mary Beth's gay guy. But what you don't understand is that she loves money and I'm bringing her jobs down until you can fucking play ball in the way that I am. Step down, look for a new woman. I have a lot of time on my hands now.

[A]

And you're, you're local.

[B]

I'm a local.

[A]

Proximity.

[B]

I'm a local hire. Do you get that?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Do you get that, baby?

[A]

Yes. I ride for corn mazes. I think, I think they speak volumes.

[B]

These lashes on you.

[A]

I can't wait to. It's like grace. Very grace coated. Yeah, I can't wait to walk through. I mean we are walking through this crazy little corn maze called life together.

[B]

Haunted.

[A]

And when, when there's one set of footprints, it's because you carried me or I carried you. We're flipping and sometimes we swap reverse and yeah, I've not done one, but I would, I totally would with you. I probably. And maybe someone I wanted to hook up with. I'm not sure. I don't know. I don't know if I'll ever be attract to anyone ever again. That's something I'm really bumping up against these days.

[B]

Yeah, you did say that to me.

[A]

I just don't think there's someone out there for me. And I'm not. I, I, I'm in the acceptance phase of just like. Yeah, maybe there's not.

[B]

Oh well.

[A]

I can't fathom like introducing someone to my family.

[B]

I know. Or me.

[A]

Could you? No.

[B]

Taking.

[A]

No. Me betting on a straight guy to the point where I bring him to you is just. It's not going to happen.

[B]

I'm always here and I'm ready.

[A]

And I know that I'm bisexual and obviously I'm saying yes to life. And I am going out on dates with men. I'm going out on dates with women. I feel worse hurting women's feelings. So sometimes it makes more sense to just not go on the date. Okay. Because I don't want to hurt a woman if it's a guy. I'm like, whatever.

[B]

Can I just say yeah?

[A]

Yeah. So I don't want people coming for me. I've been dating men for 20 years, so I have a little more practice.

[B]

Judy Hopps. I've been sucking and men.

[A]

I've been sucking for 20 years. No, no. I haven't been sucking for that long. I haven't been sucking for that long. I love corn mazes. Happy Halloween, everyone. We're not doing as much this year as we have in the past. And I just want to set the stage for people right now. This feels like this is the costume.

[B]

Come on.

[A]

This is the costume.

[B]

This is the costume.

[A]

You're doing one other one. I might be. I haven't decided.

[B]

Can't wait. Yeah, that's gonna hurt.

[A]

I'm gonna put. Unlike you tucking. I'm gonna put some cotton and that's. That's right.

[B]

Try everything.

[A]

Try everything. We're both single and we are.

[B]

Yeah, we'll see. I mean. Yeah. Yeah, we'll see. It was great.

[A]

I'm taking the costume off.

[B]

Yeah. Wait, they gotta see this. This is the reality.

[A]

Imagine me at your. Imagine me at your apartment as you don't see.

[B]

Wait, wait. Yeah.

[A]

My Victoria's Secret push up bra. It's getting stuck. This bra is an A cup. It's so big for me.

[B]

I said, the Geneva Convention.

[A]

And I say, well, what do you think of that?

[B]

And then I go like this.

[A]

No, we need to put oil on first.

[B]

And they go, you were a human this whole time.

[A]

I can't believe you did that. I cannot.

[B]

And they go, you've been queer as folks. Many drama the brown around your mouth.

[A]

We have to. Okay, that's it. Thank you, guys.

[B]

Thanks, you guys. Happy Halloween. Oh, my exit.

[A]

Benny, babe, Eyes on the road.

[B]

Benny, look out.

[A]

Rye rye Ri ry Ri ry Ri Ri ry. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.