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A
The following podcast is a Dear Media production.
B
Hey, can you come pick me up? Yeah.
A
What's wrong?
B
Nothing.
A
Are you sure?
B
Yeah.
A
No.
B
I just need a ride. Ride, ride. I just want to have fun. Start your engines. Take care.
A
I'm Benito Skinner.
B
I'm Mary Beth Barone, and this is Ride.
C
Have you noticed Mary Beth Barone's flat chest? Nobody realized this is the reason Benito Skinner chose Mary Beth Barone over Terrence o'.
A
Connor.
C
First, Mary Beth Barone's flat chest may symbolize a kind of neutralized attraction in Benito's eyes. This feature makes him feel like he's still interacting with masculine traits. For Benito, Mary Beth's flat chest provides a sense of security and continuity.
A
Avoid just female differences.
C
Serrian Mary Beth, about you. Benito's videos and their interactions have gone beyond ordinary friendship. From sitting side by side to exchanging glances. These details hint at a boyfriend like intimacy. This public display of closeness may be Bonito's way of signaling to the outside world that his emotional focus has already shifted. Finally, Bonito's choice was not accidental. Mary Beth allowed Bonito to quickly find a replacement after the breakup, avoiding an emotional void. More importantly, her presence solidified Benito's image within his social circle, maintaining the narrative consistency of him as the expert boyfriend. What do you think was the reason Bonito Skinner is with Mary Beth Barron?
A
I like that they posed that question after fully explaining every.
B
Every aspect, every detail. Neutralized attraction. Let's talk about the pros of neutralized attraction.
A
Well, what I love is that they do know that I'm nothing if not consistent.
B
Totally.
A
It's world building.
B
And you can just keep the status in your friend group because you, I guess, are dating a girl that is sort of somewhat a boy. And so in that way, we're coming full circle. And that is that women that have flat chests are somewhat boys. Gay guys are somewhat girls, and women that have flat chests. Any of y' all could date Benito. I just got to him first. Shit, dude.
A
Yeah. Seeing things like that the day after, like, one of my least favorite days on earth. Yeah. The simulation is simulating. No, seriously? Yeah.
B
I'm like, why am I catching strays?
A
Well, I knew you would. And here's the thing. I.
B
There are many, many, by the way, not just the one about my flat chest being the reason that we're together.
A
I know I can't stress enough. They're right. And I can't believe we got got.
B
Like this called out so fast. Like, didn't even give us a day to just sort of like, have some peace. It's just immediately we're dating and it's because of my flat chest.
A
Do you know how that gets made? This is what I.
B
Here's what I'm trying to. Here's what I'm thinking about doing.
A
Because also, you know that there were ones that did my net worth, but then the guy on the other side was not Terry, so it was like another guy. And they would, like, show our net worth and how over the years mine would grow and the other person's wouldn't.
B
And who's the other person?
A
No, I swear to God, I don't know who the person was.
B
How much would you pay to hire a private investigator to trace this video back to whoever put in the code into AI to make it like. I would pay thousands if anyone has the fucking skill set.
A
Do I even want to know? Do I even want to know?
B
Because it's sort of like unknown number, which I haven't watched, but I know the twist. Have you heard about this documentary on Netflix?
A
No.
B
This girl's getting like, relentlessly cyberbullied by an unknown number.
A
Isn't it her mom?
B
And it turns out to be her mom. So it's like.
A
That's so us coded.
B
Who is comes you find out after.
A
All this time, I'm the Wizard.
B
You are, girl.
A
I'm the wizard of Oz. Love.
B
Yeah. So that's been interesting. I mean, it's been a crazy year and a lot of messages of support.
A
AI said, give us.
B
They said, hold my beer how long.
A
Nina Drama made that. Yeah.
B
No, that actually makes sense. She's mad I got to you first because she is such a big bobbies.
A
She said, what's her this? They're not pressed. Why?
B
No one goes to bathroom to touch their bird after they watch Mary Beth Bar.
A
Not one person touched their bird after licking its young boy. Known as very best neutralized attraction. Well, of course. Yeah. Well, that's. I kind of like a neutralized attraction with you.
B
Wouldn't want it to be too. One way or another.
A
I don't want to be like, no, I don't want to be attracted to you.
B
Don't want to be a horn dog.
A
Neutralized. I'm kind of thinking that AI spilled because you're kind of baddy.
B
I'm giving badd.
A
Wait, but the second I walked in here, you did compliment me, like, at like fresh out the gate.
B
Well, I'm trying to win you over.
A
Well, you did it. When's it going to happen with your gender neutrality?
B
So editing a Text message in imessage. I found out years into the feature being available.
A
You can see it.
B
You can tap and see what the original message said. That's between me and God. What's the point of having an edit feature if they could see what I wrote before?
A
They used to do that on Facebook too. It's like, okay, snitch the fuck.
B
But literally, what's the point? I might as well just like do the like correction in a star.
A
I think it's so. You can't gaslight people. I really do. It's like I never said that. Go back in the messages and you've edited every single one.
B
Who would do. Who would do such a thing?
A
I can think of so many people who would. The list is so long. I.
B
People are cruel then. And it's affecting me because I deserve to be able to do a little typo correction and not have it be like, blasted to the world.
A
People are cruel 100%.
B
What if I thought of a better way to say it? But it's a crush and I'm like, fuck, I could edit it. But like, what's the point? Because then he's going to know. I then overthought it and then it's.
A
Like, we're here with Jackson today. Thank God. So I finally. Media Jackson. I love your mullet, sis. Thank you. I've been trying to grow it out. It's so cutie. God, your voice.
B
Sometimes I forget we had another Australian feature on the Pod. Rule, of course.
A
Are you a huge Rule guy? Yeah, I love Rule. I've actually met him once.
B
He's so tall. He's so fabulous.
A
I asked if he could fight on under your video and he said no, which I loved. I love. See, that's that kind of.
B
You know what? I believe that.
A
So here's my thing.
B
Self aware queen.
A
I've been hanging out with a couple straight guys lately and what I'm finding is I am completely finally out of pocket. I found the people I'm out of pocket with. I say whatever I think.
B
Do you want to talk about it?
A
Well, a little bit because I was. Kai, Kai, Kai.
B
This is a really good moment, actually. So this week it has been revealed and we're calling it a reveal. I am doing a standup Special on Netflix, netflix.com the website and the app. And Kai Newman is directing. So if you're wondering why Kai's been really in the fold lately, why Kai's been in the ether. That's why.
A
Well, that's why I dated you to stay within my. What is it?
B
Social circles.
A
My social circles.
B
Yeah, we'll keep your status within your.
A
Social circles, of course. And Benny Drama Productions. Benny Drama Productions has arrived at the premiere of Mary Beth Bruin's Netflix special, directed by Kai Newman. Me and my team were happy to join and be producers on this one. It's a. I think it's the power of stand up I have seen ever. I'm not kidding. It's literally like I've seen it now probably six times. Yeah, I saw it just for last.
B
And it's gonna change a bit, too. And having said that, it's called Galaxy Brain. The first time I was ever referred to as having a galaxy brain was under a clip where I was talking on this podcast about microwaves. So that.
A
Be careful. As your producer, she's gonna come for residuals.
B
No, for sure. And I'm happy to give her 10. 20. Give her 20.
A
Yeah, I'll give her the 20. And hey, the producers got this one.
B
You should come to the taping if you live in New York or if you live elsewhere. It is going to be. Drumroll, please.
A
Jackson, do a drum roll, sweetie.
B
It's March 19, 2026, in New York City, so tickets are available through my website. And I just can't wait. I'm really proud of it and I can't wait to have it available to, like, so many new people.
A
It's fabulous.
B
It's fabulous.
A
If I had to say one goddamn fucking word, it's fabulous. And I love your outfit for it. And I love every joke and every crevice. I love every atom of you, every.
B
Little ridge in my brain. So let's talk about Kai. Quickly.
A
Let's talk about Kai. Well, this man has got me. He's got me totally weak at the knees. He's got me laughing at dinners, and it's so funny. So I was talking to our friend Pat Regan, who's a writer on Overcompensating Genius. I assume everyone listening to Generational Talent Treatment. Yeah, he's just like. He is the funniest person alive. And so I was talking to him and we were like, okay, yeah, maybe we'll go to this, like, event. It was kind of like a gay guy night. It was like a gay guy night of sorts. And I was like, we should do this costume Velvet gold mine. We'll wear some boas and it'll be fun. And if anything, we'll mind some stuff for the show. And then Kai texts me straight, man, and he's like, we going to panic Tonight I was like, what?
B
And so then he knows stuff.
A
Well, so then I had a chaperone.
B
Yeah.
A
And that.
B
Not cutting that.
A
And you shouldn't. So Kai comes with us. He's dressed as Tinkerbell. And I spend the night laughing, shooting the. With Kai. I mean, he's just. He's. He's just one of those guys. But here's the thing. He makes me laugh. He is definitely a part of the straight guy community that talks about my fitness and my fitness goals a lot, which I love.
B
Talking about your body.
A
Talks about my body a lot. I'll say it. But he's a generational talent and he's so funny.
B
It's just built different.
A
We got this.
B
You know what I mean?
A
We got this, Kev.
B
He's both different.
A
We have chemistry. I'm not kidding. We have crazy chemistry.
B
I know. And I love to watch that unfold right before my eyes. Because I did meet you guys at Panic Panic Room on Saturday. I went out with straight guys without you, which was obviously really scary.
A
Well, you know what I told you What I said dinner at six and one too many straight guys. You've lost me. But I'm going to get a spray tan.
B
But Kai did compliment my skin. You know what I mean? It's just those little moments where I go, you're just different. You're not like the other girls.
A
What he said to me, he goes, you're what a man should look like. I said, guy, hi. I got little chills down my back.
B
Oh, my God. And yeah. Yeah, I just. I could, you know, I could go on.
A
I can't imagine all the people in his DMs. We're only making it worse.
B
Let's just say sometimes you have to make sense of your life. And you think maybe everything I've done up to this point is so that I can meet Kai Newman. Do you get that?
A
I completely agree. All the roads that led me to Kai Newman. Hey, I'll drive down him again.
B
I would do it a thousand times. You're gonna dummy for Kai.
A
Yeah. So here's the thing.
B
Kai is gonna be my plus one to some events coming up.
A
I wonder say that much. And me too, girl. Hey, let's.
B
Kai, I'll fight you.
A
My arm wrestle. Girl, with your little tat. Here's my thing. By the way, I met the apps. I mean, I don't even know what to say. But I met my kids, the emergency intercom kids.
B
I remiss to not mention that we finally met Drew and Enya.
A
Drew and Enya. I want to hold them. I want to kiss them. I did in so many ways. Drew was in a clown costume that had a slit down the back. And I thought, so that's my good fucking sis.
B
Yeah.
A
And if you come for him, you come for me. You come for my family. They were just delicious. And I want to hold them, and they're so cute. But I am kind of like, I. You know, in a way that if I saw them with Jackson, I'd be like, hey, what the fuck's going on here? So I do want to also just say, like, kai ain't ours.
B
No.
A
But we will take him as he is whenever we get him.
B
Totally.
A
And we have respect for the space.
B
Absolutely. And it's like you have to just pay respects to those that were there first.
A
It's like, hey, can I just say, Greta Titleman introduced me to JR Mendoza. I thank her every day of my.
B
I know you do. You text her every single day. You have a script that runs.
A
And sometimes I know that other people are going to go and they're going to. They're gonna go to Daddy, and he's gonna get more and more booked.
B
Yeah. And that's what you wanna see people succeed. So I guess I would just have to say, like, thank you for letting us have as much time as you're willing to give.
A
And we'll give him right back when we're done.
B
So that's what we have to say on that.
A
Can I say my biggest thing of the past week?
B
I know what you're gonna say.
A
So. I love bees. I love everything about them. I love honey. I love what they do. I love pollination. I think all of it's fantastic. Let me eat my lunch outside.
B
Bees have gotten so aggressive in the past couple years.
A
So I am honey, it seems.
B
I said I want honey. That's bees.
A
That's bees.
B
Bees Talking about Benny drama.
A
No, I know. They find me the second I go outside with my big, green, stinky salad from Goop. And I'm trying to eat, and I'm just like. I'm in the writer's room. I just want a little air. I just want a little sun on my face.
B
I know.
A
Feet in the sand.
B
Not gonna happen.
A
They swarm me. It's the Lady Gaga Wale song.
B
Looking at, looking at me.
A
Look at that. Look at how they looking at me. Eyes are sticky like honey on bees. Wait. But it's just for my lunch, though. The second I'm done with it, you can go about your days here's what.
B
I'll say about that. Because I spent the summer. I spent a lot of time at my parents house this summer, obviously grieving with my family. And I spent some time at Endear Media. I spent. I was laying by the pool. That's where I find my peace is at my parents pool. Sometimes I bring my laptop out there, even though the screen's reflective and I do a little writing. The piece was interrupted by these bees and it was like it didn't matter if I. They would. They were landing on my book. They were swarming my coconut lacroix. God forbid I had any more slow food out there. I mean, they're landing on me. And so there is something you can do that we found out by accident one time at the pool. We left a shot glass that had a little bit of fireball in it. It was a massacre. There were about 50 dead bees in there. I'm not saying I would do that. And we learned a lot. But I'm just saying there's here. I'm saying I wouldn't do. I'm saying I wouldn't.
A
You're giving him the tools to do it, but you're saying I would.
B
I'm saying I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't do it. I'm just saying it happened accidentally. So just know that in my mind. And this is what. Because I am a lover, not a fighter. And I would never want to. We need bees now more than ever. I mean, that's what I'm being told, is that I wouldn't do that. Just know that I know a way to fix it and I'm not doing.
A
It well, I'm talking to them. It's like, you know how people talk to their dogs? Like, Pinky and I have talked at length ad nauseam about all kinds of things.
B
Oh, for sure.
A
But I. I'm. I'm telling them. I'm like, no, it's all good. Like, I'm not going to kill you. I'm not going to do anything. Let me finish my Caesar wrap.
B
You know what I say to them? I go, I see you.
A
I. I grab.
B
You are seen.
A
You don't have to do this for.
B
Hey, hey, hey.
A
You're enough.
B
You're enough just as you are.
A
But also fix your eyesight. That's a flower. This is human being. There's no.
B
Whatever you're smelling, hey.
A
No nectar on this guy.
B
Well, you are seen and you are loved.
A
Now go.
B
And I hear you.
A
And fly.
B
I could ride for events which I never would have ridden for a year.
A
Ago or two years ago. You're riding.
B
No, I'm not. But I'm going to talk about something that happens at events. So when you're at events, you meet peers, you meet heroes, you meet people from every walk of life.
A
Oh, do. I mean, I met Hilary Duff. I know.
B
It was explosive.
A
She's perfect. She's actually like my favorite person. And you know who else is? Rita Ora and Taika Waititi.
B
And I am not surprised.
A
I held that man like I hold Kai Newman.
B
Yeah. No, it was very kind.
A
They are delicious. I went to this thing alone, and I was so nervous, and it was. It was folk world. I mean, it was.
B
Once again, it was folk world.
A
I just felt so safe in Taika Waititi's arms. And maybe if you don't clip that, I mean, you're just like, what's even the point?
B
At this point, I know they're having.
A
Fun, and I felt it in every way. Like, I can't stress enough.
B
Also, body. Can we talk about body tea?
A
There's so much body tea. I've been around such body tea lately.
B
Here's the problem. And this is not about any of the people that you met at that event, because this is about an event that I attended.
A
Yeah.
B
Sometimes you talk to someone long enough to realize that you don't align with their politics. And it's sort of like. And I hate to bring up the Simpsons, but if anyone is listening with.
A
I love, bring up this Principal Skinner. Are you kidding?
B
I love this when he sort of backs up into the bush and you just think, so this is the part of the conversation where I leave because I don't want to know anymore. No, no, no, no, no. Let me just. Please don't. Really hard, really tough.
A
It happens sometimes in, like, doctor's offices or, like, I don't know.
B
Oh, just anywhere. It happened to me in the Cayman Islands. I was in the ocean talking to Canadians, and they were like, really scary. What's happening with the mayoral election in New York. I was like, what is scary about it?
A
Yeah. Yeah. Nothing scary.
B
Sorry. It's actually not scary. And what the. Do you care, by the way?
A
Yeah. And can I just say, take the photo, God damn it.
B
And it can happen at, you know, meeting your boyfriend's family. It's not just like, hey, relatable. It's not just at events. Can be at work, can be anywhere. I think sometimes we make people feel comfortable to just say whatever.
A
Oh, and then your face to me, I'm like, I Got to tell this bitch some crazy shit.
B
And fine, but let's, like, let's do a little test of the waters first. Or check my Instagram.
A
Yeah.
B
Before you start talking politics with me.
A
And you also don't have to talk about really any of that with me at an event when you don't know me. You know what I mean? Like, you could have just not. Also, that's the thing where it's like, are you saying this because you also know it's kind of fucked up, or do you just want to have one ally? It won't be me, by the way.
B
I think it's an immediate feeling of I'm aligned with this person on so many things. We've talked for seven minutes, seven and a half even. And then they're going to just insert in something that they think, oh, well, there's no way this person would disagree with that. But you really just don't know. And yeah, it's tough. I don't. I don't want to say anymore, but I feel like just. Yeah, tread lightly. I mean, also, it's like I know that I have the correct opinion, so if I'm not bringing it up, please, God, don't you bring it up.
A
No, please, honey, don't, please.
B
I did want to say one more thing before we get into what we ride for.
A
Yeah, please.
B
I can be mean when prompted.
A
Yes.
B
I'm a bitch sometimes. And I have very high expectations for the people around me. Let's move on.
A
Of course. Remember when you told me that you think I'm meaner? Yeah.
B
I was canceled, actually. On the Reddit, people were saying that I seem low key mean, and I'm like, but you're nice.
A
Well, that's.
B
Oh, but you're coming to the Reddit to comment. And by the way, here's what I wanted to spell. If you ever hear a rumor about me being difficult to work with. Diva on set. Rude. I had my reasons. I would never do that unless it was coaxed out of me, that type of performance.
A
I know, sweetie.
B
And I just hit the mic.
A
So this is our land.
B
This is our land. But it's like, you don't have to spread any rumors about me being mean. I can be mean sometimes. Who among us doesn't have their moments? I don't care. It's like this.
A
Wait, I'm seeing this perfect speech for season two.
B
Love me or hate me. It's still an obsession. Love me or hate me. That's a question. If you love me. Well, thank you. If you Hate me. Well, then fuck you.
A
Who is that, by the way?
B
Lady Sovereign.
A
Oh, Lady Sovereign. I forgot about Lady Sovereign. That's good for season two as well. I stand by the thing I said that. You're a baby Chihuahua limousine princess. I know, and I think. I think that's the thing also. Sometimes when people do that where they're like, you're mean or you have mean girl energy, I'm like, I want to see you at an airport when your flight's canceled. Because if you're sweet, this I gotta see.
B
I just think it's funny just now because we have a podcast. I can say with no shame that, like, yeah, I'm a woman and I'm sexual and I'm a bitch. I'm a little, like, she said it.
A
I'm a mother and I'm a sinner. I'm a saint. I will not be ashamed.
B
Or something like that. Yeah, Like, I. I have a place where I can literally just say, like, yeah, and guess what? If you don't want to listen to the podcast anymore because you think I'm mean sometimes, can I. Don't let the door hit you on the ass on the way out.
A
I wouldn't want it any other way.
B
Totally.
A
I wouldn't. Thank you, Ice Woman.
B
Wait, what is it? Hello, Reverend Moses.
A
Hello, Reverend Moses. Proud of it, that Ice Woman?
B
No. Is it Ice Woman?
A
Those. Ship those kids off to boarding school.
B
Boarding school.
A
Should we get into what we're writing for?
B
I think we should.
A
What are you writing for?
B
I'm writing for Pinky.
A
Oh, God, yes. It's the Pinkerton episode.
B
Yeah. This is huge.
A
And I'm writing for.
B
Oh, writing for diet.
A
That's it. I literally. Could you imagine? That's it.
B
You're writing for a sound.
A
No, I die.
B
Oh, you pass.
A
All right. For diet. I'm writing for Diet Coke and its constituents.
B
Totally.
A
Is that the. Is that a misuse of that word?
B
Well, I don't know what you're talking about, so I'll find out once you start talking.
A
What does constituents mean?
B
Constituents are like the people in your district that, like, vote for you. So what do you think it means? What do you think it means?
A
I've got it. Yeah, I mean, like, for me, like, the people.
B
You mean the people that drink it?
A
No, no. What's so cool is that I completely am saying that constituents are like, Coke Zero and that's it.
B
And then the men's one that they made was the men's one. They made it for men. So is that Coke Zero said it was less feminine than Diet Coke.
A
Is that why they made Coke Zero?
B
Yeah.
A
I thought it had less aspartame. That's what I've been telling every person I've met.
B
So what you're saying is that you ride for Diet Coke and it's like off, not offspring. But it's like.
A
Let's just say I ride for Coke Zero, period. Okay, just do that. But I am going to talk about Diet Coke, which I just chugged. I practically butt chug the thing.
B
Well, it's just. It's same person, different.
A
Did you laugh at Butt Chug Jackson?
B
I didn't even.
A
You. You missed.
B
And I just say I blew right past it. So you're riding for Diet Coke. Coke Zero?
A
Yeah. Diet Coke and its constituents. We're keeping all that, but you know that it's kind of. I meant like Coke Zero and Diet Coke.
B
Sure. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace Ready? Go.
D
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B
Entrepreneurs.
A
Yeah.
B
Go ahead.
D
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B
Wow. So I've recruited my nieces to help with the ads. Today we are in the bar at my parents house, which is also kind of the loudest room in the house. So it definitely sounds like adjacent to the submersible. But we are in a bar. Ellie, you want to take this? Yeah.
E
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B
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D
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B
That's good. Well done, well done. Go to squarespace.com for a free trial and when you're Ready to launch squarespace.com ride to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. The language there can be in my own words, they say, but they wrote it so beautifully. Go to squarespace.com check it out.
E
Thank you, Squarespace.
B
I think you totally killed that ad, so I'm gonna just tee you up to talk about the article. If you're a bar very familiar with article, so as many people know, I have a few items from Article, which is a furniture website and we love Article here at Ride the Pod. So why don't we just talk about Ellie? You want to read that?
A
Sure.
E
Article offers a curated range of mid century, modern, coastal and scandi inspired pieces that not only shine on their own but also pair seamlessly with nearly any other article.
D
Product takes great care in curating its collection, focusing solely on high quality, meaningful pieces that will stand the test of time. There's no filler. Every item is chosen for its craftsmanship, design and lasting value.
B
Article offers fast, affordable shipping across the US and Canada with options for professional assembly if you prefer a hands off experience. They also have a 30 day satisfaction guarantee where you can shop with confidence knowing that if you're not completely in love with your new furniture, you can easily return it. This peace of mind ensures you can invest in your home without hesitation. Why don't you read this just at the same time and Greg Perfect to have an alarm going off in the middle of the ad.
E
If you're in the market for a beautiful new sofa, dining table or bed.
B
Head over to the article.comarticle.com we don't have Benny today, so my brother is stepping in as someone I have to.
F
Say this episode is brought to you by no CD yes, this episode is brought to you by no CD. Picture this. You're going about your day when suddenly a horrifying thought flashes through your mind. Maybe it's a fear of something happening to a loved one, a disturbing sexual image that keeps replaying your mind, or an urge to do something you don't want to do. Your heart races, your palms sweat, and anxiety washes over you. You're mortified and you feel fully convinced it's true, even though you know this isn't who you are. The questions of why did I think all that? Am I a bad person? Start to consume you and you feel like you have to do something, anything to make them go away. Here's the thing about disturbing unwanted thoughts. They're more common than you think. In fact, almost everybody has them. But for people with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, or ocd, they usually cause a lot of distress and feel hard to stop thinking about.
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OCD is a severe and very common mental health condition that causes unwanted thoughts, images and urges that often contradict with a person like Benny's values and get in the way of Benny living his life. The idea that OCD is only about hand washing and organization is a Misconception. OCD is highly treatable, but it requires specialized treatment. Because traditional talk therapy is ineffective for OCD and can often make it worse. NOCD provides effective, affordable and convenient virtual OCD therapy. With nocd, you can do live face to face video sessions with a licensed therapist trained in exposure and response prevention therapy, the gold standard for treatment for OCD. To learn more about therapy with NOCD, go to nocd.com and schedule a free 15 minute call with our team. That's nocd.com to learn more and book a free 15 minute call. And feel free to to let us know how you thought Greg did on that ad. Wait, where are we going?
A
Who cares? Ride. Can I go first?
B
Absolutely.
A
So I just took down this sizzling little drink. Ice Woman. Here's the thing. I grew up with this ad campaign. Oh ah. Starry ey Surprise.
B
Dominion Sunrise. Dance all night, Dance all night Dance all night to this DJ and that.
A
Girl in my head. She's in a green tube top and roller skates and it's the sparkle of Diet Coke. Oh what? And I'm moving my hips slowly as the TV plays it and I go, don't fast forward, don't TiVo this. I love this. My mom was a full addict. She would have like four a day of Diet Coke. And I remember at the time I was young so I was having like Coke raw or as some people say.
B
Full fat Coke every day.
A
Every day. Yeah, I mean it's why, I mean my teeth were just.
B
We did pizza night on Fridays and we were allowed to have soda then and that's it.
A
So I keep, I keep surrounding myself with dark haired beauties, I would say, who have the exact same rules. Yeah, I was the youngest in my family. It was pretty much just like let her rip. Like this kid is going to watch Real World Boston. Feel strange watching Real World Boston next Real World Road Raiders, Room Raiders. And I was gonna eat kind of whatever the I wanted and definitely take down some soda in a big way. Like I, I still can't go into a movie theater without having now a Coke Zero. But at the time a Coke slushie. I would have a Coke slushy every time I went to the movies.
B
If I had a Coke slushie, my heart would stop. I can say that with mine just grows bigger. That's how we're built different. That's how we were made different by God. In God's hands.
A
I know I can. Like I can take sugar.
B
I really can't. I have opened my heart up to soda more lately, which is, I'll have a Diet Coke. I used to take 10 years off from soda as I've talked about on the podcast. Eating disorder mentality, making rules for yourself, that sort of thing. Now as I am in recovery, I'm trying to allow myself the pleasures of life. One of them being a Diet Coke at a dinner. And sometimes then after that I have to go home because maybe it's little bubbles in my tummy, but I am trying to enjoy life more.
A
That makes us so happy. And we're happy to have you whenever we get you.
B
As one of Diet Coke's most recent constituents, I would say, like, I'm just happy to be here.
A
And God, are we lucky. You look good with one kid. Hey, thanks. I can't wait to play an old man in something one day where I go, you look good, kid. You know what I mean?
B
Yeah.
A
And that's my last role.
B
Like the older guy in the holiday.
A
Yes. Oh my God, please. He was like really old in that. I love him in that. He like melted me. I was kind of rooting for them more than I was her and Jack Black at times, which is kind of a hot take.
B
But hey, save it for the holiday episodes, would you, kid?
A
Can't wait. Yeah, yeah. So this was like a part of my childhood or whatever. Like I just. My mom and her Diet Coke, it was chic. I loved it. It was her thing.
B
I loved Coke with a straw mask.
A
My mom, I think would put it, she would put it into like a bigger cup with a ton of ice. People are so stingy with ice lately. I don't know what's going on.
B
Well, it's, it was crisis.
A
It's a crisis. Like especially in Toronto. I remember just being like, I'll beg. Like if you want me to beg, I'll beg. And I have that in Europe sometimes to travel privilege, of course, goes without saying. And New York sometimes is less on the ice. LA is like, here's a full thing of ice. That.
B
And that's dinner for a lot of people here.
A
Of course. Of course. And lunch. But I love at a movie theater. It's kind of that choose your own adventure. Like I want to be in control of the ice, I'd say because I know just the right amount.
B
Totally just the right amount.
A
So obviously huge fan of the Coke brand.
B
Oh, I forgot to say pool privilege when I was talking about my parents house.
A
Oh, good. Yeah, yeah.
B
So I just want to get that in there.
A
Of course.
B
I mean, and thank you. And can I Just say they would have.
A
They would have come for this over here. Yeah.
B
And thank you.
A
Thank you. Sorry. And thank you. Thank you. Really stuck with you.
B
Well, just the line read of. And can I just say thank you about. Come on, Kerpunk. It's a favorite of mine.
A
I've never seen something more in my life or been yelled at more in my life than that little, little phrase. So I guess I'll just say one more time.
B
Thank you.
A
Okay, so we get it all the way up to college and I'm still like practically butt chugging this Coke.
B
Like, I guess just get Jackson on that one.
A
I cannot.
B
We haven't been here in a while. See, this is kind of like he.
A
Doesn'T know that if someone giggles, it's like, well, I'm locking in. I'm saying it five more times. This is. No, he won't. You just caught on. Okay, so like I'm. And I thought, I just don't really like the taste of Diet Coke. That was my big thing. I don't like the taste of Diet Coke. Then in the last few years, I'm like, oh, it's just like a lot of sugar. And I just like. I don't know, I'm like, I got to. I gotta be thoughtful of this. My grandma had diabetes and like, I just am like trying to be less sugar obsessed. I. I'm. I mean, I'm taking it down still in a way.
B
Sugar centric.
A
Sugar centric. Whoa. My memoir.
B
Whoa.
A
Hello. So I start drinking Diet Coke. And after probably the 50th one, I was like, I think I really with the taste. And I think I need one right now.
B
Yeah.
A
And if you squeeze a lemon in it, the chills down my back when I have that first sip and to get a little caffeine later in the day, it's electric. But then I go to Europa, I go to Canada even. And Diet Coke is not as common there as I thought it would be. Instead, it's this crazy little hussy known as Coke Zero. And my God, does she have me by the balls. It's just a little better. It's different. It just tastes different. Like you. I just know. And it's like if you get a crisp Coke Zero or oh my God, God willing, you get a Coke Zero in a glass bottle.
B
Yeah.
A
What it. And by the way, of course, this is unpaid.
B
Well, yeah, I. I didn't even think we were gonna say it. Full privilege.
A
And this is not.
B
And on the. I am going to talk about Pepsi just to. Because Fair and balanced.
A
Pepsi's Pepsi.
B
Pepsi, my favorite. For those who think young.
A
I'm gonna talk. Yeah, I'm gonna talk about where I'm at.
B
Pepsi fan. I'm in a Pepsi family. My mom's a Pepsi girl. Thy Pepsi.
A
No way. You're a Pepsi house.
B
We are a Pepsi household.
A
Whoa. I mean, I. Someone asked recently, do you want Pepsi Zero? And I went, that's so cool that they didn't even try to make it sound different.
B
No, why would they?
A
It's just Pepsi's here. Like, they're like, we did the same thing. Enjoy it.
B
Hey, we saw it worked. We love what you guys did.
A
Different Pepsi is different. And I can taste the difference, but I like it too. And if it's there, of course I say bring it. So fine.
B
Yep.
A
And hey, don't apologize.
B
Equal opportunist.
A
Hey, of course.
B
Soda always.
A
So I find Coke Zero the way I would take these down on set as a midday treat. One day on set, Owen Thiel and I. I don't think anyone knows this about overcompensating Owen Thiel. We didn't have for that many days, just because obviously he was shooting adults. He was about to shoot adults. And, like, just, you know, it was very tricky to make sure that we had Owen as much as we wanted to have Owen, which was like, we need one even more of him. So we shot all the bodega scenes for the entire series in one day. And so it's just me and him in that bodega for, like, 14 hours. And then this time hits, and it's like 8pm and we're about to do, I think, the last one, which. Oh, it's the end of episode six, the Edge of Glory sequence, which I love. And we're like, it's a little flirty and just like. And it's just cute. And I look at Owen and I go, there's a McDonald's down the block. There's a McDonald's down the Block. And he looked at me and goes, diet Coke.
C
And I go, let me one up.
A
You, my good sis.
B
And you guys said this all without speaking, just looking at each other, of course. Yeah.
A
And I'm not kidding. Like, I could have. And he would have been like, yeah, that's what I asked for. I got us the biggest Coke Zeros. And then it was like, everyone around was like, I need one. So then we. I just kept getting everyone, these. Everyone on set had these absolute goblets of Coke Zero. We nailed the scene. It just brought us all together. Starry eye surprise. So what I can also say is, like, it's a great way to bond with a bestie, is to get the biggest coaxer you can. I also really recommend them before a night out, you, miss social chair had thrown a party at your place for the whole cast. And I, I love that in your place.
B
It's like extended stay, a one bedroom apartment.
A
But you, you turned it out.
B
Oh, I'm so lonely in my mansion. That's me. That's me in no way.
A
Yeah, yeah. Wait, babe, where are you? I'm so lonely in my mansion in my mansion. I love her riffs. Delicious. But on the way to it, I thought, oh, my God, I'm like a little tired and I got a massive Coke Zero and I came right to yours and I was good for the whole night.
B
Yeah, those were fun nights.
A
What I've always, I think, been a proponent for on this pod. What's always been very important to me is giving yourself just a little fucking treat. It really do just be the little things. And I'm finding that recently it's just nice to go for a walk, put in Lord, and get yourself a Diet Coke. Coke Zero in, maybe a Diet Pepsi even. What Addison Rae did for them. And I think also Brittany, I mean, when Brittany was the Pepsi girl, huge contract, monster contract. I mean, unbelievable contract. Like the choreography she had in those Pepsi ads, like, it was insane. And that interview where she's like, pepsi's Pepsi. What kind of Pepsi? I like Pepsi's Pepsi. I knew what she meant.
B
Totally.
A
Absolutely.
B
It's like when Harry Styles said, well, it's a movie that you see at the movies. It's like a movie.
A
Exactly.
B
Like, don't act like you don't know what he's talking about.
A
I completely get it.
B
Come on.
A
I remember I cheated on Coke during that time because of it. I was just so.
B
Because you were brand loyal.
A
Well, brand loyal to Brittany. I was like, whatever she's supporting. I have to, you know, I gotta put more cash in her pocket.
B
Totally.
A
And I still think that.
B
I do think it's like everything in moderation. Of course.
A
Okay, so what we wanna say is everything in moderation. Of course.
B
Of course. And I think having these little treats for yourself right now. We're living in a time when we need to cope constantly. We are in a constant state of coping with the world, our day to day lives, interpersonal relationships, every aspect, it's just coming at us from all directions. So I think any way that you have to cope is so important. And that can be just as simple as going to the bodega, getting a Coke for 12, 13, $14. However much they cost, it's very. How much does a banana cost, Michael? 10. I think prices are going up, but it's never going to be too much. Where you can enjoy an ice cold diet soda.
A
And just to anyone watching, I'm realizing it's a scab on my lip. I cut my lip. So if you've wondered the whole time, does he have chocolate cake off to the side? Maybe. But it's actually a scab.
B
It's a scab.
A
Yeah. Thank you for saying that about Diet Coke and Coke Zero. To me you're Diet Coke. To me I'm Coke Zero.
B
Totally.
A
Yeah.
B
It's that neutralized attraction.
A
It's neutralized attraction. AI spilled with that. Also. We have to shout out Amber Bain of the Japanese house also caught the stray.
B
Yeah, she was the first.
A
She was pointed out first as being.
B
Flat chested because they thought it was me.
A
Two of. Can I just say, two of the hottest people I know in the world. So happy to share that AI video with both of you.
B
Just as a little segue. Amber Bain, of course, has a song about her dog, Joni Jones. And when I realized it was a song about a dog, that just touched me in such a special place in my heart. Because I often think about writing songs about Pinky, which is who I'm gonna be writing for today.
A
You gotta do it. Make a record.
B
I might make a record. It's just all songs about my dog.
A
Yeah.
B
Okay. So this one is called osea. So this is a skin care company. It's my skin. It's Greg.
A
Oh my God.
B
The secret to glowing skin starts in the sea. Andaria. Seaweed is a not so secret ingredient in OCS best selling Andaria algae body oil. You want to read that?
E
Seaweed is a nutrient dense superfood packed with vitamins, minerals and antioxidants that help replenish the skin's moisture Berry and keep skin looking healthy.
B
Yes. And now let's talk about the TikTok famous Andaria algae body oil. It's not your typical body oil, right, Elin?
D
Rich, yet never greasy and clinically shown to instantly improve skin elasticity. Elasticity visually affirms and makes the skin feel more sculpted and toned.
B
Fast absorbing and transforms dry skin to silky, soft and unbelievably glowing. And that's exactly what it did to my skin when I got a big box of Osea and I use the body Wash as well. It's also sourced from some of the cleanest waters on earth using sustainable seaweed harvesting practices that are gentle on the planet. So you want to read this at the same time.
E
3, 2, 1. Get healthy growing skin for summer for fall or fall with clean vegan skin and body care From Osea at 10%.
B
Off your first order site wide with code ride@ocamalibu.com you'll get free samples with every order and free shipping on orders over $50. Head to o s e a malibu.com and use code RIDE for 10% off. Thank you OCA.
E
Thank you OCEA.
B
Guess what? I have another ad coming at you. I'm here to talk about Third Love. Think you can't find a bra that's sexy and comfortable? Well, think again. Thanks to ThirdLove, you can have both. ThirdLove makes better bras, period. Founded by women who were sick of settling for bras that were good enough. They have 10 plus years of redefining what a comfortable bra looks and feels like. So gals, this, you know, probably not something you'll use for a while, but made to solve fit issues that many of us face. Get extra lift, smooth out back spillage, and more. These bras are just so comfortable. As Benny always says, I got one less problem without you. Can you guys say that I've got.
E
One less problem without you?
B
Designed with the highest quality materials including innovative thermoregulation, they are also available in 60 plus sizes. Oh my God. To fit double a me to h someone else. And they also invented half cup sizes for those who are between sizes. Third Love does it all. I mean my gosh, you just go on there, throw a couple bras in the cart, do a little try on situation and you can get $15 off your purchase@thirdlove.com with code podcast15. So you guys want to say this.
E
Stop setting for average bras. Get solutions made for your body.
B
That's right. Seriously, stop settling for average bras. Go to thirdlove.com and don't forget to use our code podcast15 so that they know that we sent you to get a beautiful new bra. Or who knows, maybe even a few new bras that fit you like a glove. Thank you third love. Okay, so picture this. It's 2024. I am going through the audition process of overcompensating. I'm in the writer's room every day. I have a lover that lives in another country who refuses to move for me despite my best efforts. And I'm Just thinking, I'm so stressed out. Like, what do I know to be true about dogs is that they are de stress stressors. I mean, my goodness, you can order puppies to the office just to pet them.
A
They have them in hospitals.
B
They do What? I didn't know.
A
That's my big statement of the day. They have them in hospitals. You hear that, Jackson?
B
What I didn't know is that dogs are calming. Puppies actually cause stress.
A
Yes.
B
But I found that out very late into the process, which was, of course, six months into having a puppy. I reached out to Waggytails Rescue. When I decided it was time I was ready to get a dog. And this is coming from someone who had previously been obsessed with bleep it. Not having pets. Yeah, that was an obsession of mine.
A
Well, at the time. Hey, is everything not just a reflection of the time?
B
Well, every day is a winding road. I also wrote for changing your mind. So I decided it was time for me to get a dog.
A
So sick. Mind games with our listeners.
B
Hey, hey, can I ever Said our listeners, try to keep up.
A
Hey, I'm trying.
B
So I reach out to Waggy Tails. I tell them I'm interested. I fill out the application. I'm approved. And they said, we have 40 dogs coming from Tijuana to New York City. We'll send you photos of all of them once we get them, and you can pick the one that you want. Well, you had to send three that you wanted. So I'm at the Olivia Rodrigo concert when the email comes in with the grid of dogs.
A
Yeah.
B
And I see this dog, and she is so stinking sassy. She was doing, like, total blue steel to the camera in this photo, and it's just said baby four. Actually, no, it said, on the grid, baby four. And she's giving this sort of coy.
A
Little look, and she still does.
B
And I said, that's my dog. And I said, I didn't know if it was a boy or girl. I really wanted a girl dog. So I emailed back and I said, Baby 4 is my top choice. So, yeah, let me know. Sort of the deets and if that's the one that I can have. And they got back to me, and it was a girl, and she was three pounds, and her name at the time was Matilda. And these photos just, like, melted my heart. So I went. It was almost like back to school shopping. Like, you go get all the materials that you need for this little creature that's gonna, like, totally change your life. So the day that she came to New York. I went to the East Village, I got her. And I've never smelled anything worse than the smell that was coming out of that van. Cause it had 40 dogs in crates in it. So I decided to take her immediately up to Midtown, where my mom was getting her haircut quickly.
A
Let me raise you, I.D. football locker room.
B
Yeah. So I never smelled some shit like that.
A
Yeah. Yeah.
B
So I brought her up to the hair salon. We put her in the sink where they wash hair, and we washed her and her skin, you could see through her white fur. My mom said, I think we should name her Pinky. And so it's Pinky in the brain. But also, Pinky was my nickname when I was little. My dad used to call me Pinky because I only wanted to wear pink. So, yes, I did name my dog after myself. And that's some legends only.
A
Shit. Let me introduce you to my poodle, Drama.
B
Drama.
A
Yeah.
B
So, Pinky. Wow. The first few months were really, really hard. I mean, the first year was hard.
A
I was there.
B
It was rare crate training, potty training in an apartment building. Just dealing with, like, the chaos of having a puppy. I also had so much paranoia about being a bad dog mom that I would, like, play with her for too long where she would get so tired, and then that's when they start biting you. She had razor sharp teeth. But I know what type of parent I would be if I had kids. Because when she pooped in her crate, I was like, she's just expressing herself creatively.
A
Yeah.
B
You know, and I just would. I just know I would always defend my kid.
A
She's figuring it out.
B
She's just like, let her fucking do her process.
A
Yeah.
B
But it was really, really tough. And it was hard sometimes, you know, especially when we were on set.
A
There was one day in particular, I believe, where she took a. In my trailer. Yeah. MP just kind of like within second trailer. But to me, I think I realized who I was as a parent because I thought that's so cool. It was very.
B
Letting water dry because I just cleaned it up. And you didn't. You weren't mad? Well, it was very cool.
A
It was.
B
So the doors saw Megan Draper of you.
A
Oh, God.
B
Oh, God.
A
Of course. No, but I just remember being like. Like, yeah. I mean, my baby girl's comfortable. She's with daddy. And, like, I just took a nap, so how could I care about anything right now?
B
And having a dog has changed my life in so many ways. There. There was a lot that I learned on Reddit.
A
It's changed my Life.
B
Yeah.
A
I mean, she's a wonderful dog with this dog.
B
Yeah, she's fabulous. I know. But I went on puppy 101 for a bit, and I found out about the puppy blues, which is where there's, like, several points in having a puppy where you think you've, like, totally ruined your whole life and made a huge mistake. You just have to push through. We had some, like, moments where we had to really dig in on the training aspect and. And setting firm boundaries. She's still crate trained, and I'm really proud of my girl. What I also found out is that every dog has behavioral issues. At most dogs, probably 99%. And it's just like, a roll of the dice which one your dog is gonna have. So Pinky is resource guarding, so sometimes she'll get really feisty if there's, like, food around and there's another dog. So we just avoid that stuff. But it's really just like, managing your dog. I also have a nanny for Pinky. Nanny privilege. I have so much separation anxiety and guilt that I am a working mom, a single mom. And I would never, ever equate a.
A
Single mom who works two jobs.
B
Two jobs.
A
Two jobs.
B
I have seven jobs. And I would never equate having a dog with having kids. I'm like, dog mom. I don't think that they're equally as hard or anything. It's very much a she rescued me situation. And I'm really glad I got her, like, so she was old enough when the election happened that she was just a comfort to me and not stressful because, like, I've really needed that, especially this year with everything that's happened to me.
A
I'm so glad you have Pinky.
B
I also wanted to say that I did that after I got dumped. I went to Pilates that day.
A
Yeah.
B
And that was for Pinky, of course. You know, and that was for all the girls out there.
A
Yeah.
B
That I've had to go through some like that and just, like, show up.
A
We going to let down your Pilates instructor?
B
I love her.
A
Show up.
B
I love her. Yeah. And so Pinky's really been there for me. And I think, like, she is just so Goddamn. The face card is lethal.
A
Face card is crazy. She's brawny. Like, she's got these shoulders on.
B
She's masculine and feminine.
A
And now you know why. Now you know why. I'm completely. Completely. I mean, she's got my jaw on the floor, but I do this thing where right behind her. Oh, my God. I'm talking about my Girl, I'm talking about my baby girl. Me and her lately are connecting in a way that's like she's locked in with me.
B
Well, it's very like I'm not the stepdad, I'm the dad who stepped up because she's had two dads already.
A
And it's like she goes, finally, this one's gonna stick.
B
Yeah.
A
Because she knows and I've been in. I mean, I'm doing my rotations, but I. She. Oh my God. We had this terrible night out. Got home, we've already talked about it. She gets on my chest and I just start rubbing right behind. Like I guess it would be on her shoulders, her head, her neck curls back. She goes.
B
She puts down a joker smile.
A
It's crazy.
B
I have a really good picture of her doing a joker smile that I'll finally post because we never talked about it.
A
I just worked her shoulders.
B
You put her in your shirt sometimes.
A
I love putting her in my shirt. Well, it's skin to skin contact. You're supposed to do that as a father.
B
Totally.
A
So why wouldn't I?
B
So I did think she was going to be £6 total. She is £16, but she flies with me. She is.
A
I wouldn't want her smaller.
B
Can I say I thought it would be cool to have a dog I could put in a bag. But she had her own ideas about what her life would be. And we are so similar. We really, we. We are moody, we are demanding. We want to be scratched and tickled.
A
Sexual.
B
Sexual. Very. She has a lot of energy in that department.
A
Yeah, she does.
B
And having something else to take care of, it's what I want.
A
Both love Beni drama. Jesus Christ.
B
And we're both huge fans.
A
Get off the guy of the work.
B
She's seen the show a lot and so, yeah, it was. It was hard to tell her when my last relationship failed, but I just. It's. It is what it is.
A
It's all a part of her story and I think she gets that.
B
And just to think about a little puppy on the streets of Tijuana that now is a big city dog and she's just living large. And like I spoil her because I.
A
Marissa Cooper, in a way.
B
Mary Marissa. She was. Yeah. And we played. When I brought her home, I played Hallelujah by Jeff Buckley. Very cinematic and silent. It's never a good time to get a dog probably. So just. Just dive in head first. There's tons of rescues. Yeah, I just. I mean, I love her so much and she is like such an Important presence in my life. Like, I'm just so happy.
A
And yes, everyone. So the overalls, I did get them for a six pound dog, not a 16 pound dog. So we are working on getting a different size. It's. It is what it is.
B
At the airport, it's like I'm walking around with like Mickey Mouse, you know, like everyone wants to pet her and everyone's so happy she's there. I think putting in the time early on to make her be a good dog. She's not perfect.
A
When she grows up and hears all this, I know it's going to mean so much to her.
B
I just love her. I just love her.
A
No, I do, too.
B
And again, I want someone to talk to me how I talk to you.
A
Don't have her here with you right now.
B
Do you know she's with the. She's with the nanny. My fabulous. I need her, Sasha. So, yeah, when I come home with Pinky, I'm. I'm nuzzling in her neck. I'm telling her how special she is, how much I love her, how much she makes my life better. I just. Yeah, it would be cool for someone to feel that way about me. Maybe one day.
A
I think so.
B
And I feel better. I feel like a rescue puppy.
A
Yeah.
B
In dating, I'm like, I've been through so much trauma.
A
Yeah.
B
And I just need someone that makes me feel safe so I'm not shaking in the corner because that's kind of what it feels like sometimes. Should we get into ride or die? Yeah.
A
You know I'm here to hold you.
B
I know. And I'm so grateful.
A
Very much in the same way.
B
Beautiful. Full life.
A
Skin to skin contact. I love putting you in my shirt whenever you need me to.
B
And it's because it's so billowy.
A
It's crazy. How many hotel rooms have we cried together in?
B
A lot. And Pinky's there now, which is really cool.
A
It's so cool she gets to see that.
B
Yeah.
A
Yeah. I love holding you, though. You're both my little chihuahua limousine princesses.
B
Yeah. And. And hey, we're happy.
A
What a gift. You know what?
B
You are, Mary Beth, Bisexual.
A
Well, yeah. But you're also my ride or die. Ride or die. I ride and die for Pinky. I would do anything for that dog. She is my princess. She tested me on set, but in ways that I didn't know a man like me could be tested in these ways. You know, when she knocked over that camera, I think it was a good lesson in could anything matter less.
B
But also it was good for me to be like, I do need to get this dog in check.
A
Of course.
B
And sometimes it's just you gotta leave her home.
A
Yeah. And I. And can I just say I know for a fact that my bestie, bestie Barone is not putting her dog shites in an empty garbage.
B
Never. I. I always put back in the home.
A
What I have to remind again. It's that it goes back into the garage and then the garage smells like. Because the bags you use are not good. They're not the ones. Those green ones are not doing it. They're not enough. My garage still smells like Zuki.
B
You know what? That's not gonna be a problem in New York.
A
Never a good time to move. But it is what it is.
B
I'm really glad that you and Pinky have this bond because it's obviously so important to me. Like. And she just fudgeing loves you so much. Like when you come over you see her whole but her whole back half of her body.
A
Like she does a wiggle. But she knows daddy wore butts come through to check on his princess.
B
I sent her to a camp for training. And I just have to read you what they wrote in her like you know, daily summary.
A
Yeah, of course.
B
It was so fudgeing cute.
A
Can't wait to have her on set. She's gonna be on set every day.
B
I'll post it. She is going to be a full on set dog this time.
A
Yeah.
B
I'll post what her report card said at camp.
A
And you have to post at least the close up of her costume. Maybe we can edit out where she goes.
B
Also one time I did get an email from her daycare and this subject was Pinky's behavior.
A
So reputation.
B
I had a meltdown review so long ago though.
A
Reputation. Yeah, Pinky's behavior. You walked in flustered. What did you do now to embarrass us?
B
What?
A
What did you do now to embarrass us?
B
I ride for Diet Coke and Coke Zero and its constituents. It's many millions of constituents. I love having a little comfort. I love giving yourself a little treat you love like bubbly drinks. And it's just such like a. It's such like a.
A
It's because I'm sparkly.
B
It's a cornerstone of your personality. It is.
A
Thank you, sweetie.
B
It's your effervescence.
A
Thank you.
B
So I just know when I sit down at a table, if you're not there yet, I'm ordering a flat that a tap water for me in many ways. And Then a sparkling water for you.
A
I find it so unbelievably hot when someone goes, I already ordered you the sparkling water. I went.
B
And can I say one thing?
A
What?
B
When you order a Diet Coke at the table, you empower everyone else at that table to also order a Diet Coke.
A
I just say, I'm literally both shoes on the seat. I don't care. Dear media, these are. These are Rennet.
B
One day we'll tell you guys about my Jennifer Hudson impression in Sex and the City movie. But we did cut it. We will be doing it in season six.
A
It would get cut in somewhere else. Diet Coke. Pass it on. What you do to a table if you order that shit? It's like an espresso martini. The whole table's a buzz.
B
Have you heard of the term vibe shift?
A
You know, vibe shift?
B
Yes. Oh, you're fluent in vibe shift?
A
Yeah.
B
Shift the vibe at that table.
A
People don't know that after you have your first cocktail, you can have a Diet Coke. After, to give you a little caffeine and a boost before you hit your second drink. And that's where I am built different. I don't abide by these rules. Sometimes, like, you know, God, smash the patriarchy.
B
Do what you wanted a dinner, except don't be awkward and weird. You know, like, don't get so drunk that the dinner is weird.
A
Yeah, if you're weird when you're drunk, like, stop drinking. Yeah, one drink. Warm water. What has daddy always said? You're being so fucking weird. Yeah, I will say people are really strange to single people. And I am so sorry because I never really knew. Well, but now I've been new and I'm. I am. Oh, my God.
B
Next week I'm riding for being 25 at heart. That's a little. That's a little Preview for you.
A
22. Yeah. Yeah. I can't wait to meet you.
B
Well, we hope you all enjoyed first episode post Halloween. The world is different now that we've posted those costumes. I hope you realize.
A
What did I say to you? It was like, it's media that shouldn't exist, but now it does and.
B
And we can't go back.
A
We can't go back. It's like. It is. Yeah.
B
Welcome. We just can't stop.
A
We can't stop. I have to be here with my bestie, even though she's a raging.
B
Yeah, psycho.
A
Got Jackson on that one. My love butt Chug. Maybe we'll just end with that. One, two, three. All three of us.
B
Bye, Chug.
A
Oh, my.
B
Exit Benny babe Eyes on the road Then you go.
A
Ride, ride, ride, ride.
B
Ride Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.
In “Pinky + Coke Zero,” Benito Skinner (Benny Drama) and Mary Beth Barone return with the gleeful, freewheeling energy that defines their best-friendship. The episode riffs humorously on their public personas (and the wild speculations AI coughs up about them), dives deep into personal anecdotes about stand-up, dogs, and comfort drinks, and peppers in witty observations on modern life, gender neutrality, and self-care rituals. Centered around what the hosts are “riding for”—Mary Beth’s beloved rescue dog Pinky and Benito’s undying love for Diet Coke and Coke Zero—the episode is a blend of comic banter, genuine affection, and the duo’s signature cultural commentary.
[00:36-02:45]
Notable Quotes:
[01:52-04:34]
[04:34-05:22]
[06:06-07:34]
Notable Quotes:
[07:34-10:14]
Notable Quotes:
[10:15-11:11]
[14:20-17:07]
Notable Quotes:
[17:12-18:51]
[19:29-36:32]
Mary Beth Rides for Pinky (her rescue dog)
Benito Rides for Diet Coke & Coke Zero
Notable Quotes:
Timestamps:
[35:36-36:11, 50:59–53:38]
Notable Quotes:
[35:36-36:11, 52:12-52:17]
If you want pure “bestie energy,” both in the bimbo and galaxy-brain sense, this episode delivers. “WE RIDE AT DAWN!!”