Lara and Carey return to recap the maddening final installment of The Valley’s Season 2 reunion. But first, they discuss the harrowing new Tesla Diner, the NPC-ification of downtown LA, hetero hell foodie scenes, how lighting up the Hollywood sign at night could save Los Angeles, Alien: Earth, Lindsay Lohan and Shailene Woodley’s new venture and the complicated nature of the Hulu-sphere.

Back at Radford Studios, Danny’s creepy behavior with Brittany at a party for this year’s Super Bowl is brought before the tribunal. Janet, Jason and Jasmine attempt to squash their beef, as Doute tries (unsuccessfully) to pull one over her rindom nemesis from Ohio. Jax laments the pro-Brittany party at his namesake watering hole as he faces off with Zack one final time. Nia and Danny commit to a throw-everything-at-the-ceiling-defense blitz to deflect from Danny’s drunken sex pestery. And they convince nearly everyone except Janet, who somehow, despite everything and her own incredibly rindom tendencies, comes out victorious against the Old Guard. Jax then leaves the soundstage and disappears into the hazy dusk of the “Other side of the hill,” becoming merely a myth in the San Fernando Valley.

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Valley of the Dolls Ep. 30 - Last Tango in Jax’s Tavern (The Valley S2E18)

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