When people hear our story, they usually want to know one thing...

How are we doing now?

This year marks 11 years since one of the hardest seasons of our relationship. It's still hard to believe it's been that long. Time really does fly.

If you've followed me for a while, you know Khalif and I have always tried to be transparent about what we've been through. We don't share everything, but we do share enough to hopefully encourage someone else who might be walking through a difficult season.

The biggest thing I can say today is this, we're doing well.

Not because life is perfect.

Not because we never disagree.

And definitely not because we've arrived.

We're doing well because we've never stopped doing the work.

One of the biggest reasons for that is counseling. Even after all these years, we're still meeting with our counselors. Some people think therapy is only for relationships that are falling apart, but I couldn't disagree more. For us, it's maintenance. It's a chance to check in, work through unhealthy patterns, and make sure we're staying intentional instead of simply going through the motions.

Recently our counselor challenged us with something that really stuck with me. He said sometimes we're either living in the past or worrying about the future instead of truly being present. That hit home. Even after healing, there are still moments where it's easy to protect yourself instead of fully showing up. Healing doesn't mean you forget what happened. It means you stop allowing it to control every decision you make.