Olympic Butt Swaying & Best Movies Based on a True Story - Spit Hits! - Comedy Podcast

Summary

Spitballers Comedy Podcast

Episode: Olympic Butt Swaying & Best Movies Based on a True Story
Air Date: March 26, 2026
Hosts: Andy, Mike, Jason

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Overview

This episode is classic Spitballers: hilarious, fast-paced, and filled with absurd hypotheticals, pop-culture musings, and tongue-in-cheek life advice. The trio dives into quirky “Would You Rather” scenarios (from Olympic medals to robotic body parts), debates the merits of sense of smell, and brings back their fan-favorite Balderdash-inspired game ("Baller Dash"). The main event is a draft of the best movies based on a true story, sparking spirited debate and nostalgia. Regular fans will appreciate the high-energy banter; newcomers can jump right in thanks to its self-contained, family-friendly comedy.

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1. Would You Rather & Olympic Butt Swaying (03:40)

Topic: Olympic Aspirations—Medal or Bust?

• Prompt: Would you rather compete in your favorite Olympic event but fail to medal, or win a bronze in speed walking (or another embarrassing event)?
• Debate Over Speed Walking:
  • Jason: "It's all about the hardware. The Olympics is about the hardware to me." (04:30)
  • Andy questions the legitimacy: "They slow mo. Look at these feet. These people… none of them [follow the rules]." (04:14)
  • Mike: "I want Olympic medalist on my résumé." (04:36)

Butt Sway/Pacewalking Commentary:

• “Is there a dumber event than speed walking?” – Andy (03:56)
• The group jokes about how policing the rules is impossible and the essential “shimmy of the butt.”

Shooting Event Meme:

• Mike brings up the Turkish silver medal shooter’s viral nonchalant style: “He’s got a hand in his pocket, both eyes open. And he just points and shoots. And he got a silver medal.” (07:06)
• Andy: “My favorite meme of that was a photo of him with his cat. It said, if anything ever happens to this cat, we’re gonna get four movies made.” (08:05)

Key Takeaway: They unanimously value an Olympic medal, no matter the discipline.

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2. Senses: Smell and Taste Dilemmas (09:09)

Would You Rather: No Sense of Smell vs. Everything (food) Smelling Rotten

• The consequences of each are debated:
  • Andy: “This is a real thing—when food smells rotten… those people have an exceptionally hard time eating.” (10:03)
  • Jason: “I think I could choose the second one. I can plug my nose and be the first person… but then I get all the rain smell and all the other good smells of life.” (10:39)
  • Mike and Andy joke about nose plugs and elaborate meals.

Memorable Tangent:

• Discussion about scratch-and-sniff markers and whether it’s a good idea to make chemicals enticing to children.
• Andy: “That would be like scenting bleach. Oh, man, it smells so good. Now we have made donut-smelling ammonia. Breathe it in.” (13:21)

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3. “Half-Robot Body” Hypotheticals (13:53)

Prompt: If half your body became robotic, which half (front/back; top/bottom; left/right) would you choose?

• Andy derails the question to talk about floral-scented spider spray: “I'm telling you guys, this smells so good. You could clean with this stuff. Just clean your counters and you'd be like, this house smells good. And it'll kill everything that's on the counter and you'll die.” (15:10)
• Group ultimately agrees: “We’re all taking legs.” (20:56)
• Hilarious riffing on robot faces, robot legs running on gasoline/solar, robot digestive systems, and “buns of steel.”
• Quote: “Can I eat anything?” – Mike (18:38)
  Andy: “Yeah, but you can’t taste it.”

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4. Game Time: Baller Dash (23:23)

Structure

• Five prompts: Word definition, Notable person, Acronym, Movie plot, Weird law.
• Points: 2 for guessing the real answer, 1 if someone selects your fake answer.

Notable Moments & Quotes

Word: Farden Bag (24:04)

• Options included various silly definitions.
• Correct answer: Upper stomach of a cow. (26:20)
• Laughs about the phrase “fart in a bag.”

Notable Person: Elmo Lincoln (27:12)

• Real answer: First actor to play Tarzan. (28:31)
• Andy: “A steel baron. That’s awesome!”
• Mike racks up points with plausible fake options.

Acronym: APDA (29:03)

• Real: American Power Drinkers Association (30:46), which Mike chose; everyone laughs at Andy’s “Advanced Potato Development Association.”

Movie Plot: "Blobbermouth" (31:48)

• Red herrings galore, including a pandemic and “ChatGPT” authored synopsis.
• Mike: “What a mouthful. … A blobber mouthful.” (33:19)
• Actual answer: Remake of The Blob with Steve McQueen as a stand-up comic (34:05).

Weird Laws: Montana & Fur-bearing Animals (34:31)

• Real: Only legal if you tattoo your name on it. (35:58)
• Group is baffled and amused. “Are you kidding me?” – Andy

Final Game Scores:
Mike: 10 | Jason: 6 | Andy: 5
(“Congratulations, Mike. You’re amazing.” – Jason, 36:39)

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5. The Draft: Best Movies Based on a True Story (37:43)

Key Takeaway:

Hosts passionately defend their favorites and reminisce about classic flicks—perfect for movie buffs.

Top Picks & Notable Quotes

1st Round

• Jason: Catch Me If You Can
  “If you haven’t seen Catch Me If You Can…there’s not a wasted line or moment in the movie.” – Andy (39:01)
• Mike: Apollo 13
  “The actual production for when it came out was mind-blowing.” (40:59)
• Andy: Braveheart
  “There was a William Wallace…This is based on a true story and is the best true story of all time. Braveheart, baby.” (41:46)

2nd + 3rd Rounds

• Wolf of Wall Street (Andy)
• Argo (Mike)
  “You gotta be kidding me…but it is actually real.” (44:21)
• Into the Wild & The Social Network (Jason)
• Cool Runnings (Mike)
  Group erupts in joy: “Feel the rhythm! Feel the rhyme!” (46:12)
• A League of Their Own & Remember the Titans (Andy)
• Black Hawk Down (Mike)
• Society of the Snow (Jason)
  “I just remember growing up hearing about this movie…there was this true story when people ate people.” – Andy (50:35)

Undrafted Mentions / Honorable Mentions (51:03+)

• Moneyball
• The Big Short
• Erin Brockovich
• Hidden Figures
• Revenant
• The Pianist and Schindler’s List
• The Founder (McDonald’s)
• Ali, Cinderella Man, The Patriot, Titanic
• Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story (“Not a true story!”)

Notable Draft Banter:

• The hosts question what “based on a true story” really means, especially regarding movies that take historical liberties (e.g., Braveheart, The Patriot).
• “Would you have counted Titanic?” – Jason (53:46)

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6. What Did We Learn Today? (54:14)

• Andy: “I learned that Mike is really good at Baller Dash.”
• Mike: “I learned that there is maybe nothing sillier than a front half robot.”
• Jason: “Tom Hanks and DiCaprio are into the true story.”

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Notable Quotes & Moments with Timestamps

• “Is there a dumber event than speed walking?” – Andy (03:56)
• “He got a silver medal. Yeah, he just won.” – Mike (07:29)
• “I want an Emmy. Right? I think all three of us deserve an Emmy.” – Andy (05:31)
• “If your food smells terrible, it will taste terrible.” – Andy (11:51)
• “That would be like scenting bleach. Oh, man, it smells so good. Now we have made donut-smelling ammonia.” – Andy (13:21)
• “I'm telling you guys, this smells so good. You could clean with this stuff.” – Andy, on floral-scented spider spray (15:10)
• “Can I eat anything? Yeah, but you can't taste it.” – Mike & Andy (18:39)
• “A steel baron. That’s awesome!” – Andy (27:57)
• “Feel the rhythm, feel the rhyme.” – Mike (46:12)
• “Congratulations Mike, you’re amazing.” – Jason (36:39)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 03:40 — “Would You Rather”: Olympic Medals & Speed Walking
• 09:09 — Would You Rather: Lose your sense of smell
• 13:53 — Half-Robot Body Hypotheticals
• 23:23 — BALLER DASH Game begins
• 37:43 — Movie Draft: Best "Based on a True Story" Films
• 54:14 — “What Did We Learn?” & Closing thoughts

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Final Thoughts

This episode delivers Spitballers’ signature absurd humor, off-the-cuff debates, and joyous nostalgia for pop culture—especially movies. The chemistry among Andy, Mike, and Jason remains top-notch as they riff on each other’s quirks and escalate ridiculous ideas into all-out comedic bits. Whether pondering the dignity of a speed walking medal, questioning robot digestive systems, or defending Cool Runnings as a cinematic masterpiece, the Spitballers keep the energy high and the laughs constant.

Perfect episode for:

• Fans who love clean, family-friendly comedy
• Anyone looking for fun “would you rather” debates
• Movie buffs and trivia lovers
• Listeners who appreciate running jokes (“Feel the rhythm!”) and lighthearted banter

Transcript

[Andy]

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[Mike]

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[Andy]

What happens when three buffoons give life advice, explore unrealistic situations and give random topics more thought than they probably deserve? It's the Spitballers podcast with Andy, Mike and Jason.

[Jason]

Blurp, blark, blink, blinkity, boop boop.

[Mike]

Okay,

[Jason]

welcome in.

[Andy]

There were some words.

[Mike]

Blerp.

[Jason]

I like that word.

[Mike]

It's a good word.

[Andy]

I wish I could blurp.

[Jason]

You've never been able to blurp.

[Andy]

I can't blurp. I can fart though, man. Don't you worry. Don't you worry about a thing.

[Jason]

Well, you got to be able to get rid of the excess gas in some fashion or you would explode. Explode. Welcome into the Spitballers. Any Mike and Jason back with you? Would you rather some baller Dash? And we are drafting once again on today's show. Today we are drafting the best movies based on a true story. So it's a movie draft. Always fun. And so we'll get into that. Jason is nodding with a smirk, so he's got some picks he's a fan of.

[Andy]

Look, I think today's show is going to be excellent.

[Jason]

Okay.

[Andy]

I'm looking forward to the draft and I'm looking forward to this Baller dash. It's been a while since we played Baller Dash.

[Jason]

Yeah, I can't wait to learn how to play again. You can follow this show over on X at Spitballers pod, the website spitballerspod.com and the best thing you can do for us is just click that follow button on the podcast apps. Or if you're feeling extra nice, tell a friend.

[Mike]

Tell a friend how to make you're feeling nice.

[Jason]

Tell a friend how to make their day just a little bit better.

[Andy]

Yeah. And you can watch [e-mail] Spitballers. Would you rather.

[Jason]

George from Patreon says, would you rather compete in your favorite Olympic event but fail to medal or win a bronze medal in speed walking or a embarrassingly dumb event?

[Andy]

Is there a dumber event than speed walking?

[Jason]

I still don't understand how people can't cheat.

[Andy]

It makes no sense.

[Mike]

And they do. I saw someone like took a video because it's speed walking. So I think by definition you have to have one foot on the ground at all times.

[Andy]

Oh, nonsense. They do. And they, none of them do.

[Mike]

They slow mo. Look at these feet. And these people are. No, they're definitely not doing.

[Andy]

No one is. No one is doing that.

[Mike]

So the rule, I guess it's just all in the, in the shimmy of the butt, the butt sway. Because people don't run like that.

[Jason]

That being said, it's all about the hardware. The Olympics is about the hardware to me.

[Mike]

Right. I want to Olympic gold or Olympic medalist.

[Jason]

Yeah. I mean like 20 years from now, I will have a medal from the Olympics that is far more valuable than coming in 8 out of 8 on the 5000 meter. Like I, I have been watching some of these races. I watched one five minutes ago and it was really exciting for those top few people. But some of these people are just left in the dust.

[Andy]

Yeah, if I got to compete at my favorite event, that would be me getting dominated at basketball and being a huge liability for my team while these, you know, six, five to seven foot just manimals make me look like an idiot. That wouldn't be a good time for me to be like. But I, but I got to step out there and humiliate.

[Jason]

Now if you came in fourth in the like 100 meter dash, would that be better?

[Andy]

No.

[Jason]

I mean, does that change anything?

[Mike]

No.

[Andy]

Give me speed walk. Look, I want an Emmy. Right? I think we all here want an Emmy. I think the three of us deserve An Emmy.

[Jason]

We don't care if it's for the Spitballers podcast.

[Mike]

No, Footballers podcast.

[Andy]

No, the footballers podcast. The Spitballers podcast. I don't even care if it's like one of those offshoot Emmys or it's

[Mike]

like, this is the local best host

[Jason]

with high body fat percent.

[Andy]

You can, you can categorize that thing down as far as you want. Best host named Jason. Over £250 with a beard. If I win that Emmy, I am

[Mike]

an award winning specific Emmy.

[Andy]

Yeah.

[Jason]

And when they say, what did you win your bronze in? That's when you say the Olympics.

[Andy]

So anyway, yeah, the Olympics is what

[Jason]

I wanted in Mike, what do you think?

[Mike]

Oh, I was going to say, did you guys catch the guy? It was a shooting event.

[Jason]

Oh, you bet I did.

[Mike]

And it's the Turkish guy. Yeah. The memes are absolutely incredible of if you didn't see it somehow there. I think they're just firing a pistol at a target I assume is it could be a half mile away. I have no idea.

[Jason]

It's actually pretty far away.

[Mike]

It's very far away. And then you have all these competitors with like really high tech glasses where it's like lens on lens on lens so they can see the bullseye even clear. They have stances where it's like that old Nintendo. What, Duck Hunt?

[Jason]

No, no, no. The Nintendo device that people used to wear on their game. What is it called when. The red screen. The Nintendo red screen in front of your eye.

[Andy]

What?

[Mike]

Virtual boy?

[Jason]

Yeah, that's it. Go on.

[Mike]

We're like a Google Glass situation, but. And then they'll have like stances where they're kind of turning over their shoulder, I imagine, to stabilize. Yeah, stabilize. Balance yourself out a little bit better. Because any, any tiny movement and this Turkish guy shows up, he's got a hand in his pocket, both eyes open, both eyes open. And he just points and shoots. And he got a silver medal.

[Jason]

Yeah, he just won.

[Andy]

I didn't watch. I didn't watch it. I've seen the picture. Everyone. A lot of people have seen the photo of him just standing.

[Mike]

So good.

[Andy]

Hand in the pocket, eyes open. Getting a silver medal at the Olympics. But I have to imagine he raised that gun up a tenth of a second before he's fired. You know what I mean? Like, that dude just walked up and goes, I don't care. Give him. Give me a.

[Mike]

You want me to hit what, that thing? Okay.

[Jason]

And I represent. Oh, the country.

[Andy]

Yeah. My favorite meme of that was a photo of him. This is A real photo of him with his cat.

[Jason]

I did see that.

[Andy]

And it said if anything ever happens to this cat, we're going to get four movies made.

[Mike]

John Wick.

[Andy]

Yeah, Total John Wick. That dude is awesome.

[Mike]

But I am, I am taking an Olympic medal, guys.

[Jason]

I mean, yeah, yeah, it's pretty. Pretty epic.

[Andy]

You know how fast I can walk.

[Mike]

Well, I mean, legitimately, we're over here laughing because we respect other sports, but I mean, I imagine that the people who are in it, they all take it very serious. And then if you have a medal and anyone to your face is trying to be.

[Jason]

Are you any good at this?

[Mike]

Yeah. Like, well, it was with speed walking or whatever. And you go, I have an Olympic medal. What do you have? Put a pedal, go. Oh, but your sports dumb. I have an Olympic medal.

[Andy]

Put it in reverse. Let's say we meet the gold medal speedwalker from the Olympics. I'm not looking down at that person. No, I'm never thinking. It's talking behind their back. No, they're an Olympic gold medalist. Of course. Give me the medal.

[Jason]

Chris from Patreon. Would you rather have no sense of smell at all or a normal sense of smell with the exception that all foods smell rotten?

[Mike]

That what, Howard, you possibly pick that one. Yeah.

[Jason]

Because nothing smells good. So it's like, would you rather have.

[Mike]

Everything does except for food. So you're gonna have to wait.

[Andy]

What really smells good outside of food? Like, you got roses. Okay.

[Mike]

Lots of things smell good. Act body spray.

[Andy]

Does it?

[Mike]

No, but there's colognes and perfumes and shampoos and there's plenty of things that smell like nature.

[Jason]

Is there a smell of the rain?

[Andy]

A rainy. Oh, for sure. Before it rains your own farts?

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Andy]

Someone smell popcorn.

[Jason]

So then all the food just smells rotten, though. That would.

[Mike]

Food.

[Jason]

How are you going to eat? Smell and taste go together 100%.

[Andy]

In fact, when people. This is a thing that happens to people where food smells rotten, oftentimes after a disease or something. This is a real thing. And those people have an exceptionally hard time eating.

[Jason]

Like which the first option here, no sense of smell means you're also going to have a hard time eating harder.

[Andy]

But yeah, I mean, I can eat without great flavor, but I mean, the sense of smell affects your taste. So if you're smelling rotten food or rotten anything, I think it's not going to work. It's going to taste.

[Jason]

I think I could choose the second one.

[Andy]

You think you could?

[Jason]

Yeah, because I can plug my nose and then be the first person. But then I get all the rain smell and. And all the other good smells of life. I don't want my scents to be gone.

[Andy]

If this question was, in order to smell the world, you have to plug your nose every time you eat. I would not choose that. Really? Yeah.

[Jason]

Oh, I'd get into a good. Like, I'd have clothespin on quick draw.

[Andy]

Okay. I didn't think about the clothespin. I'm gonna be honest with you. I thought. I was thinking, you know, how am I cutting my steak? Okay, I need two.

[Jason]

I thought you just lost your hands.

[Andy]

I need two hands.

[Mike]

So they bring it up. Monsieur, your clothespin.

[Andy]

Yeah, it's definitely under the lid. They present the clothespin.

[Jason]

I don't want to lose the other smell. I don't want to lose my sense of smell.

[Andy]

I know that what I'm about to say is inaccurate, but I'm still going to say it. I don't care about those smells.

[Game Host]

I don't care.

[Andy]

I think if I. Like, I just was talking about how I love the smell of right before it rains.

[Jason]

Oh, you don't care about those smells.

[Andy]

Yeah, I don't care.

[Jason]

I thought you were literally saying you don't care if your food smells terrible. You know, it's good.

[Andy]

No. Goodness gracious. If your food smells terrible, it will taste terrible.

[Jason]

Yeah, it will.

[Andy]

So that's how. That's just.

[Jason]

Have they done. I mean, that would be a really funny experiment just to go through putting a different smell under your nose while, like, you've made some delicious steaks, put it on the plate, you cut it up, you're about to eat it, but then you're. You're, you know, you got a little smell card of something else.

[Andy]

Yeah, maybe.

[Jason]

And maybe not even nasty, but, like, what would it be like if you had a strong chocolate smell under your nose while you ate that steak versus a strong garlic smell under your nose.

[Andy]

I mean, it should. It should taste different.

[Mike]

Yeah, it'll affect it.

[Jason]

It's just weird, right, how they connect.

[Andy]

It's kind of strange that they haven't come out with that form of dietary medication.

[Mike]

I've seen a video of. It was a lady had the chocolate bar, and you go, that throws down some vegetables. It's like a bowl of broccoli.

[Jason]

That's when you know you've hit rock bottom. That's what the fast food restaurants should start doing with their. Like, the new Jack in the Box burger should come with this little smell card, like a filet mignon.

[Mike]

You guys remember scratch and sniff?

[Game Host]

Yeah.

[Andy]

Oh, yeah. Wait, that's not a thing anymore.

[Jason]

Oh, not for you. You got rid of your smell.

[Mike]

I don't think so. Scratch and sniff was the markers too? Yeah. Oh yeah, the ones you're supposed to smell. Those are a problem though, because those markers, they smell delicious. They didn't just smell good, they smelled like food. They tasted good. No, no, they did not. That's the issue, I think.

[Andy]

I don't think they make those anymore. I think it was like. Wait, wait, wait. Are you saying that you're making markers that you're incentivizing people to huff? Like, the whole point of your sales pitch is smell this chemical that you should not be smelling. Like, that would be like. I mean, that would be like scenting bleach. Oh, man, it smells so good. Now we have made donut smelling ammonia. Breathe it in.

[Jason]

All right, Mike from Patreon, if half your body were to be replaced with robotics, would you rather it be your front, back, top, bottom, or left? Right. Which would be the robotic half and which would be human? This is going to take some work. Let's all examine each of these.

[Andy]

I can't. I didn't hear you. I just. I just. You think of something. I got to go back to the former question because I realized that I have a scorpion and spider spray and this thing is full, man. Does it work? Yeah, it does on contact. That scorp is going to insta kill itself. That spider just shrivels.

[Mike]

Is there anything that you could spray that would live through that? Like, I know it's marketed as spider scorpion, but that sounds like it's just going to. Whatever you sprayed on is gone.

[Andy]

100. I think you're 100% right.

[Jason]

All their sprays are the same chemical. They're just all labeled spider scorpion, probably roach.

[Mike]

This one's cockroach.

[Andy]

It's an amazing marketing strategy. But my point is I'm remembering that that stuff is scented, floral and smells outstanding. No, I am telling you, it is the most.

[Jason]

That's illegal.

[Andy]

But I'm just now connecting some dots here. I am literally only smelling the scent if whatever comes out of that can is going into my nostrils. Right? Isn't that how the science works?

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Andy]

That stuff's made to kill it's literal poison.

[Jason]

Do you think that the spiders are like, ooh, that's.

[Andy]

But why are they.

[Mike]

Frank, you gotta get over here.

[Andy]

Why are they sensitive?

[Mike]

Get a whiff of this poison.

[Jason]

Because the smell of poison normally is so egregious, it's off putting. I don't want to. I don't want to use those in the house. I only use them out of the house. But I'd use a lavender scented one in the house.

[Andy]

I'm telling you guys, this smells so good. You could clean with this stuff. Just clean your counters and you'd be like, this house smells good.

[Mike]

And it'll kill everything that's on the

[Andy]

counter and you'll die.

[Jason]

If half your body were to be replaced with robotics, would you rather it be the front or the back? So, like, you can only choose.

[Mike]

That one is so weird.

[Jason]

That one's really straight down the middle. Top or bottom or left or right? Do you want to cut it down to just top, bottom or left? Right.

[Mike]

No, I want to at least imagine.

[Andy]

Yeah.

[Mike]

What are the benefits of a front back?

[Jason]

I mean, like a robot butt. But not your. Not your front abs.

[Mike]

Your abs and your pectorals.

[Game Host]

Yeah, that's what I was thinking.

[Andy]

Strong.

[Mike]

Your shins. No more shin problems.

[Andy]

Yeah, well, I wouldn't want a robot face. Right.

[Mike]

Well, you'd have one if you go.

[Andy]

Yeah, that would be the downside.

[Mike]

Yeah, that's. Yeah, you're right. That's a problem. We'll rule that one out. So left or. So if you go left, right, you get one leg and one arm.

[Jason]

Cool. Yeah. You get one of each.

[Andy]

Isn't there a mike. You're the superhero. Isn't there one of the. Let me correct that. You're the superhero knower. Okay. I stopped after. You are the superhero.

[Mike]

I thought you were about to give up my. My actual identity.

[Andy]

Isn't there a superhero that is, like, on the left half is a robot, on the right half is a human.

[Mike]

I don't know about that, but are you thinking of Cyborg?

[Jason]

That is who I was.

[Andy]

Yeah.

[Mike]

I mean, he's part robot, which is what all. I don't know that he's.

[Andy]

I don't.

[Mike]

I don't know that it's.

[Andy]

It's not split down. Left. Right.

[Mike]

Okay. Okay.

[Andy]

Just trying to. Trying to unpack this. I mean, what part of you would you want the most.

[Jason]

Robotic.

[Andy]

Yeah, robotic. Like what. What's the most advanced Legs?

[Mike]

I think it's legs.

[Jason]

I think is. I want the bottom.

[Mike]

It's your base. I don't know, man.

[Jason]

I want to be able to run really fast, climb, you know, jump.

[Andy]

But I'm not going to do those things.

[Mike]

Whereas if you had robot legs.

[Andy]

Okay, that's fair. But the robot legs doesn't give me good cardio. That's up in my heart, my lungs. That's you know, if I went legs now, I can't even handle how much power this takes to.

[Mike]

No, but it's way easier because your robot legs aren't running off of your blood.

[Andy]

You don't think so?

[Mike]

No, they wouldn't be robot legs. These things are pure oil and gasoline. Oh, really? Okay. I don't know. But if they're robotic legs, it can't be your cardioc.

[Andy]

All right.

[Mike]

Okay. Yeah, it's on a battery or something. Solar.

[Jason]

What is the benefit of top half? Robot, bottom half? Not. I mean that one.

[Mike]

It seems you got like incredibly strong arms.

[Andy]

Yeah, You. You try to not open a jar

[Jason]

of pickles, but your entire.

[Mike]

That pickles just shatters in your hand.

[Jason]

Your entire digestive system and all that is robotic.

[Andy]

Now that feels.

[Mike]

Can I eat anything?

[Andy]

Yeah, yeah, but you can't taste it.

[Jason]

You know, the robots can't taste.

[Mike]

Robots have a legendary sense of taste.

[Jason]

The metal tongue.

[Andy]

I imagine that if your top half is robotic, the amount of things you could see through your eyes would be incredible.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Andy]

You know the, the computer system in your mind, the thing that like Google

[Jason]

swap your arms out to.

[Andy]

We're always supposed to be. Oh, sure, you could hot swap your

[Jason]

arms out for wings.

[Andy]

Oh, now we're talking.

[Jason]

You're too gonna be too heavy for like a helicopter. Propellers.

[Mike]

Okay, some cannons. Maybe Some cannons.

[Andy]

I'm just saying like 4th of July. I got firework rocket arms.

[Mike]

Okay, now we're talking.

[Andy]

Just pointing straight in the.

[Jason]

With this normal man body. Bottom half.

[Mike]

Yeah, just real skinny legs.

[Jason]

What about like swimming? Swimming is.

[Mike]

Oh, that's a problem.

[Andy]

Yeah, you're gonna rust.

[Jason]

I don't think top half though, you can swim. Bottom half.

[Andy]

Yeah, you can wait around in the water. If you're top half robot.

[Jason]

Hey, you hang out in the shallow.

[Andy]

I mean, any robot here, the water's a problem. I still don't understand the front versus back.

[Mike]

No, I don't either.

[Andy]

Okay, I've got one front versus back. If you choose the.

[Jason]

I guess it's armor.

[Andy]

If you choose the back, you have buns of steel. You can hide your robot. You can. You know what I mean? Like, you can. You can.

[Mike]

Yeah, I see what you're saying.

[Andy]

You know, you're still going to get some advantages, right? My hamstrings, my calves, my glutes.

[Jason]

Yeah, but think about the biggest problem.

[Mike]

Oh, yeah, we just said water's a no go.

[Jason]

Yeah, you're wiping.

[Mike]

Wait a minute.

[Jason]

You're wiping with your hand.

[Andy]

But am I pooping?

[Jason]

Yeah, otherwise I mean, it's got to be.

[Andy]

I think it's just an oil change, man.

[Jason]

What you got half a digestive system. This whole front, back thing is a mess. Zole front to back is you can't go back and forth.

[Andy]

I mean, I imagine where my heart is. That means half of it would be robotic.

[Jason]

How do you imagine where it is?

[Andy]

Well, like front to back. I don't know how close to my chest versus how. Okay, yeah, it's right in the middle.

[Jason]

I see what you mean. You meant like.

[Andy]

Yeah, I just mean depth. The depth.

[Jason]

How deep is your heart?

[Mike]

So deep.

[Jason]

I think I'm going to go.

[Andy]

Yeah, we're all taking legs.

[Jason]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mike]

Going legs.

[Jason]

Okay. We're going to take a break and get into some baller dash.

[Mike]

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[Jason]

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[Mike]

We.

[Jason]

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[Andy]

What time is it? Game time.

[Jason]

Well, it's been a minute. We are jumping into baller dash. This is very fun. It's so fun that Al loves explaining it every time.

[Game Host]

I sure do. All right, you guys were given five prompts in five different categories. Those categories are definition of a word, a notable person, an acronym, a movie plot, and weird laws. Your objective is to identify the correct answer and trick your opponents into picking your fictitious answer.

[Andy]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Two points or just getting them. All right, sure.

[Andy]

Oh, that's true.

[Game Host]

Go for that. Two points if you guess the correct answer. One point if an opponent guesses your answer.

[Jason]

All right, let's begin.

[Game Host]

All right, we're going to start with the definition. The word is farden bag.

[Jason]

Whoa, whoa. Spell that for me.

[Game Host]

F, A, R, D, I, N, B, A G. Farden bag.

[Andy]

So the D is a real important letter. It is in this farden bag.

[Jason]

Yes. Because I know what a fart in bag is.

[Andy]

I'll be honest. I. Yeah, exactly. I'm farting a bag before.

[Mike]

I mean, who amongst us, Jason, when

[Andy]

you cup your hand, can you call that a bag?

[Mike]

Who amongst us hasn't tried to trap a fart?

[Jason]

Yeah, I don't think it's possible. Not to the degree that you hope.

[Andy]

Yes. Well said. It's possible. Just never good enough.

[Jason]

No. All right, so what is the definition?

[Mike]

I've had supreme strong successes.

[Jason]

Oh, my gosh. Is it the quality of the Ziploc?

[Andy]

I think it's the quality of the fart. Yeah. As a professional cup of cheese.

[Jason]

Or is it the layers between bag and.

[Mike]

Yeah, look, you know.

[Andy]

Yeah.

[Mike]

You got a bare bottom. It.

[Jason]

Oh, man. Sure.

[Andy]

You got a bare bottom.

[Mike]

I mean, I can't filter it out.

[Andy]

Amateur hour.

[Jason]

This is a professional podcast.

[Andy]

Farting bag. Yeah. I'm bringing it back to the game here. Farden bag.

[Game Host]

All right. Is a farden bag the upper stomach of a cow?

[Mike]

Okay. Stomach.

[Game Host]

A bag of assorted treats given out at German festivals.

[Mike]

Okay. German bag. Okay.

[Game Host]

A slang term for a quick meal that was often associated with the working class. In Germany.

[Andy]

Another German one.

[Game Host]

Or a medieval pouch used to store magical herbs.

[Jason]

All right, I got my answer.

[Andy]

Oh, man. All right, I got my answer as well. Now, is there a rule on.

[Mike]

We got a lock.

[Andy]

We got a lock.

[Mike]

I think we take turns locking in first.

[Andy]

All right. All right.

[Mike]

So if you guys were confident, go ahead. You can start, and I'll lock in first.

[Andy]

I'll go first on this round. I'm going to go upper stomach.

[Jason]

That's what I'm doing, too.

[Mike]

Is this a trap?

[Jason]

Well, we're all supposed to decide beforehand.

[Mike]

Yeah, I'll go. Stomach was what I was going to do. So whatever. We're all going for it.

[Andy]

Okay.

[Game Host]

All three of you got that correct?

[Mike]

Okay. All right.

[Game Host]

Bag is the upper stomach of a cow.

[Jason]

I went hard with one of the Germany ones.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Andy]

I figured you two were the Germany. And I genuinely thought. I mean, I was sure if you

[Mike]

were going to pick one, but you

[Andy]

guys were taking the magical herbs.

[Jason]

Oh, yeah, yeah. No. All right, all right.

[Game Host]

Everybody got two useless points on that one.

[Mike]

Magic is not real. That was the biggest problem for that one.

[Andy]

Yeah, sure.

[Jason]

For the real definition of something, I

[Mike]

mean, if you had just said, like, herbs.

[Andy]

But that was my trap. That was what I thought.

[Mike]

It worked.

[Andy]

Yeah, yeah. The magical.

[Jason]

I genuinely do you fall into it, Mike.

[Mike]

No. That's how I was able to sidestep it.

[Andy]

But my goal was that it was too obvious. Like, no one would say magical magic's not real. So it's there. But you guys didn't think hard enough. Okay, that's on you.

[Jason]

So it's on us.

[Mike]

Okay, that's my bad, dude.

[Jason]

Thank you.

[Game Host]

Moving forward, we'll. We'll lock in the answers before anybody gets theirs out. All right, we're going to talk about notable people. This person. Elmo Lincoln.

[Mike]

Elmo Lincoln.

[Jason]

Elmo Lincoln.

[Game Host]

Was Elmo Lincoln a New York governor who played a pivotal role in creating the Erie canal?

[Mike]

Boring.

[Game Host]

Was Elmo Lincoln known for inventing the first full size wooden casket?

[Mike]

Casket.

[Game Host]

Was Elmo Lincoln the first actor to play the role of Tarzan?

[Mike]

Oh, man. That's a good answer.

[Jason]

Good answer.

[Game Host]

Or was Elmo Lincoln a steel baron that lost his empire in a business war with John D. Rockefeller?

[Jason]

Oh, man. I want to give that one the credit even if it's wrong.

[Andy]

John D. A steel baron. That's awesome. I didn't know that was a thing.

[Mike]

Crush your enemies.

[Andy]

That's an oil baron, Mike. It's still oil baron. So good.

[Mike]

Okay, so governor casket, Tarzan steel baron.

[Jason]

I'm going I got mine locked.

[Andy]

Yeah, we got to lock them in.

[Mike]

Okay. I got mine locked in.

[Andy]

I've got mine locked in.

[Jason]

All right, Mike, what are you going with?

[Mike]

Tarzan.

[Jason]

I'm going to go steel Baron.

[Andy]

I'm going to go casket. So we're getting different points here.

[Game Host]

All righty. Mike got the answer correct. He was the first actor to play the role of Tarzan. So Mike gets two points there.

[Mike]

Great success.

[Game Host]

And then, let's see.

[Mike]

Steel baron.

[Jason]

Was that one of your guys? Answers?

[Game Host]

That was Mike's answer. So he gets a point there. So he's at 3.

[Andy]

And he was the casket.

[Game Host]

Andy was the casket. So Andy gets one point.

[Mike]

What around, boys?

[Jason]

Yep. All right, so we're on to the acronym.

[Game Host]

That is correct.

[Jason]

And Mike is winning 5 to 3 to 2.

[Game Host]

That is correct. All right, the acronym we're gonna. We're gonna try and decipher here is apda. Apda what does APDA Stand for?

[Andy]

Oh, the apta.

[Mike]

Yeah, we have all heard of apta.

[Jason]

Mm.

[Andy]

Yeah, the.

[Mike]

The.

[Andy]

That Elmo.

[Mike]

What is it?

[Andy]

That Elmo Lincoln was the APTA that played Target Swift.

[Mike]

Oh, my goodness. I don't even have a. I don't have buttons over here.

[Jason]

No, that's pretty rough.

[Mike]

Goodness.

[Andy]

That was great.

[Jason]

All right.

[Mike]

Is shameful.

[Game Host]

Is APTA the Advanced Problem detection and Analysis.

[Jason]

Hold on. Okay, we got a lot to write down here.

[Mike]

I'm just writing one word. Hopefully it works out.

[Jason]

Go ahead.

[Game Host]

Advanced Potato Development Association.

[Jason]

What? Don't need to write that down.

[Mike]

Potato.

[Game Host]

Alabama Police District Attorney.

[Andy]

That's one person.

[Mike]

They have an acronym. Alabama Man.

[Game Host]

Or American Power Drinkers Association.

[Mike]

These are all brutal.

[Andy]

Oh, man.

[Mike]

Power drinkers.

[Jason]

What was the first one?

[Andy]

Now that we've.

[Game Host]

The first one was Advanced Problem Detection and Analysis.

[Mike]

All right,

[Andy]

then there's a potato, a district attorney, and a power drinker. Okay.

[Jason]

All right. I got mine locked.

[Mike]

Okay. All right. I'm locked. I'm locked.

[Jason]

I'm going Advanced Problem Detection Analysis.

[Andy]

I'm going Power Drinkers of America, baby.

[Mike]

I'm going Power Drinkers.

[Game Host]

The correct answer was American Power Drinkers association. And Andy picked Mike's answer of Advanced Problem Detection and Analysis.

[Andy]

Mike, you are crushing. You are crushing this game.

[Jason]

Wow.

[Andy]

No one wanted my potatoes.

[Jason]

Oh, man.

[Andy]

You were the. Let me.

[Mike]

Let me explain why you two didn't fall for that.

[Andy]

Yeah, it's on you.

[Jason]

You didn't.

[Mike]

You thought too much this time.

[Andy]

I was very surprised when I. What was my acronym there again?

[Game Host]

Advanced Potato Development Association.

[Andy]

Ooh, man, I was. I was trying to go for the Right answer.

[Jason]

I mean, the other three words were great. They could have been any P word in there.

[Andy]

I just assumed that that was the real acronym. Poodles.

[Mike]

Poodles would have been way better.

[Jason]

All right, so Jason has four points because of that one.

[Andy]

Yes.

[Jason]

Mike has seven points or eight, and I have three.

[Game Host]

All right, we're moving on to the movie plot. The movie title is Blobbermouth.

[Jason]

How do you spell that?

[Game Host]

B L O B E R M O U T H. Blobbermouth.

[Andy]

Blobber mouth.

[Game Host]

Was Blobbermouth a film about a global pandemic spread through drinking water?

[Jason]

Okay, pandemic.

[Game Host]

Or was Blobbermouth a diver off the coast of Australia becomes the host of a blobfish monster that terrorizes Queensland?

[Jason]

Okay.

[Game Host]

Or is Blobbermouth the remake of the horror flick the blob with Steve McQueen starring as a struggling stand up comic? Hey, Chad.

[Jason]

GPT.

[Game Host]

Or lastly, was Blobbermouth A teen can't stop sharing the secrets of a small town after he finds and shares a dark secret of the most powerful family in town, the Millers. The boy awakens in a dark room with his mouth sewn shut.

[Andy]

That's a long card. Okay, will you read me the one that was chatgpt? Again?

[Mike]

Just read them all again real quick.

[Game Host]

All right, we got a film about a global pandemic spread through drinking water.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Game Host]

A diver off the coast of Australia becomes the host of a blobfish monster that terrorizes Queensland. The remake of a of the horror flick the blob, with Steve McQueen starring as a struggling stand up comic. Or a teen can't stop sharing the secrets of a small town after he finds and shares a dark secret of the most powerful family in town, the Millers. The boy awakens in a dark room with his mouth sewn shut.

[Mike]

Oh, my gosh.

[Jason]

What a mouthful.

[Andy]

Yeah, a blobber mouthful.

[Mike]

Good.

[Andy]

How do you lock one of these in? All right, I've got.

[Jason]

All right, I'm locked, but I'm not revealing first.

[Mike]

Okay, I'm locked.

[Andy]

All right, if we're locked, I will go ahead and reveal first. Yeah, I'm gonna go with the global pandemic.

[Mike]

So am I. I'm gonna go with

[Jason]

the teen secret paragraph with the mouth shut.

[Game Host]

All right, nobody got the correct answer?

[Jason]

No.

[Andy]

No.

[Game Host]

Which was created by ChatGPT. Apparently the correct answer was the remake of the horror flick the blob with Steve McQueen starring as a struggling stand up comic.

[Mike]

Wow.

[Game Host]

Andy's answer was the film about the global pandemic so he gets two points there. And Mike was the paragraph. So he gets one point.

[Jason]

You idiot.

[Game Host]

You idiot. All right, so now we got Mike with.

[Mike]

Apparently the other ones were a little more concise.

[Game Host]

Mike has nine, Andy has five, Jason has four.

[Jason]

Final round.

[Game Host]

And we are on to the final round.

[Mike]

High score for sure.

[Andy]

Yeah, for sure.

[Game Host]

You are crushing. All right, this is the weird laws. The law is in Montana, it is a crime to keep a fur bearing animal that you have caught. Unless. Unless it lives inside your house.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Game Host]

Unless you tattoo your name on it.

[Mike]

What claimed?

[Game Host]

Unless you live on a registered ranch with at least 20 acres of land.

[Jason]

Okay, that's a good answer.

[Game Host]

Unless you are a licensed zookeeper.

[Jason]

Okay.

[Game Host]

It is a crime to keep a fur bearing animal that you have caught in less. You need me to read him again?

[Jason]

He's a lives inside the house, tattoo

[Andy]

your name on it, have enough land or are a zookeeper.

[Game Host]

That is correct.

[Mike]

Hmm.

[Jason]

I mean, this is keeping a fur bearing animal that you caught. That you caught, not killed. This is not like you caught, like killed it and you keep its fur. This is a fur bearing animal you caught and want to keep.

[Mike]

All right, all right. Okay.

[Jason]

All right. I've got my answer.

[Andy]

I'm locked in.

[Mike]

I got mine.

[Jason]

I'm gonna go lives inside house.

[Andy]

You're both. I'm going the registered land if you have enough land. Also, how do you tattoo a furred animal?

[Mike]

You can still get down to the skin. Sure.

[Andy]

But the fur grows back tattoo is

[Mike]

gonna be the right answer.

[Game Host]

That is the correct answer.

[Andy]

Oh, my gosh.

[Mike]

I pivoted the last second.

[Andy]

Are you kidding me?

[Game Host]

Nope. Tattoo your name on it was the correct answer. Mike was enough land. So he gets one point from Jason. And then Jason's was the live inside your house, so he gets two points.

[Mike]

It was too easy. See, that's how you do it, man.

[Jason]

Give us a final score here.

[Andy]

Oh, I beat Andy. That's what matters.

[Jason]

Wait, how did he get two points?

[Game Host]

Because you both guessed his answer. So Mike ended with 10, Jason with 6, Danny with 4, 5, 10 points.

[Andy]

I'll take second place, considering.

[Jason]

Wait, which. Which one was the.

[Game Host]

Jason's answer was the live inside your house.

[Jason]

Oh, we both did do that.

[Mike]

Y. All right.

[Jason]

Congratulations, Mike. You're amazing.

[Mike]

Thank you.

[Jason]

Here's a break. With target. Filling every basket with Easter magic has never been easier. That means fun and festive finds starting at just $3. From tasty favorite day treats to the softest Gigglescape plush toys. We've got everything you need to make their day. So find all the Easter basket goodies they'll love at Target.

[Mike]

Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile with a message for everyone paying big wireless way too much. Please, for the love of everything good

[Andy]

in this world, stop with Mint.

[Mike]

You can get premium wireless for just $15 a month. Of course, if you enjoy overpaying. No judgments. But that's weird. Okay, one judgment anyway. Give it a try. @mintmobile.com Switch upfront payment of $45 for

[Jason]

3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month required intro rate first 3 months only. Then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. See full [e-mail].

[Andy]

The Spitballers Draft all right.

[Jason]

I think this draft is. It's tougher. It was tougher than I thought it would be to really. It's the ranking of them. Like there's a lot of movies that are based on true stories that are out there, but putting them in an order was more tough. I have the first pick and we're

[Mike]

still going the right direction despite.

[Game Host]

Correct.

[Andy]

Yes. So it will go.

[Jason]

Despite the fact I'm sitting in the wrong spot. Correct.

[Andy]

So it will now go. Andy, Mike, Jason.

[Jason]

Okay, good luck. Al. I think I'm going to go with. For the first pick I'm going to go with. I'm going to go with Catch Me if you can.

[Mike]

Oh, that was easily my number one.

[Jason]

Catch Me if you can.

[Mike]

Easily.

[Jason]

If you remember the plot of that movie.

[Mike]

Oh, it's so good.

[Jason]

That's Frank Abigail Abagnale. Abagnale who?

[Andy]

Abagnalee.

[Jason]

Con artist DiCaprio Hanks. And if you haven't eluded the FBI,

[Andy]

if you haven't seen Catch Me if youf can. If this is a movie, you're like, oh what, what is that? You can. You've. You've listened to enough of this episode for it to register as a download for us. So, so you can stop now and go watch that movie. It is an all timer. It is so entertaining. It's one of those perfect movies.

[Mike]

Yes.

[Andy]

Where there's not a wasted line or moment in the movie. It's like Back to the Future where it's like everything is totally necessary. And I mean that takes you places. That movie is awesome.

[Mike]

There's movies where it's like it any moment that I tune into the movie, it doesn't matter.

[Jason]

That's one of them.

[Mike]

That is one. And just on top of the.

[Jason]

That would have been your 101.

[Mike]

Oh, easily. And the story is so that was like I read the book Boys like that's how much I love that movie. The story is so outrageous of a book.

[Jason]

That's what they call a movie.

[Mike]

Basically a. A teenager is able.

[Jason]

Yeah. It was all before he was 19.

[Mike]

Is able to trick professionals. That he is a pilot, that he is a doctor, that he is a lawyer. Like the story is unbelievable.

[Andy]

Well, he's the mouse that kept fighting two mice.

[Jason]

And then the real character ends up on like late night talk shows.

[Andy]

Yeah. I mean it's to say that this is. We're drafting movies based on a real story. It is the most unbelievable real story of all time. Like you.

[Jason]

Yeah. All right, all right.

[Mike]

That was easily my number one. Number two. I know the order. So I'm going to. The number two is Apollo 13.

[Jason]

Oh.

[Mike]

Which because you got your movie. You're pumping you. Yeah, yeah, that's fine. Jay. I know where you're going to pick.

[Andy]

I can't believe he didn't take it.

[Mike]

And Apollo 13 is a great movie. And it's also. You have to. If you can go back in time, like if you're our age, you can go back and think about seeing that in the movie theater with. They're in zero gravity, man. This is back when we didn't have computers that could do that. They had to film in a plane that's. That's diving and so they could have zero gravity in the movie. It's. That is like the. Where the story of Catch Me if you can is unbelievable. The actual just production of Apollo 13 for when it came out.

[Jason]

I like the pick.

[Mike]

Mind blowing.

[Andy]

That would have been. That would. That's next on my list. So it would have been one of my two picks here and Catch Me if youf can was ahead of that. So it's great. But I can't believe that the actual 101 and especially like I was like so jealous that you had the one on one Andy. Because I. Our favorite movie of all time because

[Mike]

it's so barely based on. It's movie based off of name in somewhat of history.

[Jason]

Yep.

[Mike]

Braveheart Baby.

[Andy]

It is.

[Jason]

I didn't want to give Braveheart the historical credence.

[Andy]

You don't think that there is. But it is based mostly.

[Jason]

There was a William Wallace.

[Andy]

Yeah, there was a William Wallace.

[Mike]

I think there's even like. Are we 100% sure there's a Will.

[Jason]

There's definitely a William Wallace.

[Andy]

There's definitely a William Wallace.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Andy]

This is based on a true story and is the best true story of all time. Braveheart baby.

[Jason]

I mean we did say based on all right.

[Andy]

I mean, the truth is, most movies based on a true story take a lot of liberties. They're very commonly loose.

[Mike]

So William Wallace's Wikipedia, the little snippet that pops up, this is William Wallace, popular movie depiction. 95. And then the film was criticized for many historical inaccuracies.

[Andy]

Yep. But it's awesome. And it's still based upon the. Still based upon. All right, That's a great pick.

[Mike]

Okay, Good job. Okay.

[Andy]

All right. My next one. Trying to play the game here because I. I think you guys might have left this off your list. And so I'm going to. I'm going to wait on it would be my next pick. It's an unbelievable movie, but I gotta. I gotta play the game and take something I think you guys might take. And please correct me if I am wrong that this is not like this. This one seems like Catch Me if youf can where this couldn't be a real story. Right. But when I was looking it up, it said it was based on a true story. The Wolf of Wall Street.

[Mike]

Yeah, it's. Yeah, that's a real person.

[Andy]

Okay.

[Mike]

It is loosely based off of.

[Andy]

Well, there you go.

[Mike]

Stories of his life.

[Andy]

I will take the Wolf of Wall Street.

[Mike]

Yeah. Like, that guy's, like, on social media and stuff now, talking about things.

[Andy]

That's. That's. That's a pretty wild movie.

[Mike]

Yeah. I don't. I don't know how much is accurate, but I think that he loosely.

[Andy]

I. I have one. I have one on my list that is so loose.

[Mike]

That's even worse than Braveheart. I knew he would, too. Way worse Is going to be a

[Jason]

danger zone for Jason.

[Mike]

I. I had it on my list and I was the same as Andy of like, I can't do this. Yeah. Okay. I'm going to keep going with just. Of stories where I can't believe it is actually based off of a true story.

[Andy]

Argo.

[Jason]

Argo's on my list, man.

[Mike]

Argo. Jay's blank stare. You don't remember that one?

[Jason]

1979 Iranian terrorist crisis.

[Mike]

It's the Ben Affleck movie where the government puts together a crew of pretending they're gonna make a movie and then they get some. The hostages.

[Jason]

Six Americans rescued.

[Mike]

And it's like it actually happened.

[Andy]

So I have seen that.

[Jason]

Have you not seen that movie?

[Andy]

No, I have seen it and it is a very good movie.

[Mike]

The movie's great and the story is just like, you gotta be kidding me.

[Andy]

There's no way that it's real.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Andy]

But it is actually Real. My blank stare was because I was like, fargo is not a real movie. A true story.

[Mike]

That's also not what I said.

[Andy]

Right. Arago is a different movie.

[Jason]

Back to me.

[Mike]

Yep. Two picks.

[Jason]

All right. My next pick is actually going to be into the Wild.

[Mike]

Okay. That's the Alaska movie.

[Jason]

That's the young kid that gives up all of his possessions and goes and lives in Alaska in the bus. And you never seen that?

[Andy]

I have never seen that.

[Jason]

It's a book.

[Mike]

I haven't seen it, but I believe

[Jason]

it's a Jon Krakauer book. And then the movie and like, is

[Mike]

the bus still there or. There's something about that.

[Jason]

Yeah, you can still. I think you can still go find that. Yeah, he's not there anymore.

[Mike]

So you like that one?

[Jason]

Yeah. I thought it's one of the best true stories. And then the second one I'm going to go with is, I'm going to save this one till the end, I think. So I'll go with the Social Network.

[Mike]

Oh, it's a great movie. It's so good.

[Jason]

I will go with Zuckerberg Store.

[Andy]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Fincher makes good.

[Jason]

So the whole Facebook backstory, you know,

[Andy]

I came across that, and I forgot to put it on my list, but it was fun to watch. That's a good watch. And it's so modern, obviously.

[Mike]

And it's like if you're Zuckerberg, and, I mean, I'm sure there's plenty of liberties taken in there, and not everyone comes out of that movie looking fantastic, but, like, if you're Zuckerberg, I'm watching that movie going, yeah, I'm. I'm looking pretty good right now. Good work. Okay. I can't take any chances. I. It's not on. It's not on Jason's list, I don't think. But again, we can't take any chances because you got to feel the rhythm. You got to feel the rhyme.

[Andy]

What a great pick. Oh, my God.

[Mike]

Runnings, baby.

[Andy]

Cool.

[Jason]

Runnings. Based on a true story.

[Mike]

We got a bobsled team, man.

[Jason]

Oh, my gosh.

[Mike]

Yes, Dude.

[Andy]

Best pick of the draft. I can't believe. Not on my list. I mean, you're dead.

[Mike]

Bond.

[Andy]

Totally forgot, but that is.

[Mike]

You got to pick that thing up.

[Andy]

The Olympics are going on right now. I mean, that.

[Mike]

Well, I love that.

[Jason]

I loved that movie as a kid.

[Mike]

Watch it again. It's.

[Jason]

I was based on a true story. We've got all these serious Iranian hostage crises, and this is the Jamaican bobsled team.

[Andy]

Yeah. And. And I'm Going to be honest with you here. I'm going to keep rolling with your concept here. Okay.

[Mike]

Jump in.

[Andy]

I'm going.

[Mike]

Water's nice.

[Andy]

I'm going. Sports.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Andy]

I'm going. No, there's a lot of true sports movies and I'm not going to take your first one. Okay. Because this is the movie I wanted. Second, it is a great movie. It's a little older and I don't think it's going to be on your guys list. A League of Their Own.

[Mike]

Oh, yeah.

[Andy]

Great movie, that movie. Great movie. Is awesome. Also has Tom Hanks.

[Jason]

Does Hanks and DiCaprio only do these, like true stories?

[Andy]

Yeah, they're on a handful of these and then I'm going to follow that up.

[Mike]

Truth is better than fiction.

[Andy]

Oh, man. Oh, I was. You know, Andy, your response has me questioning which movie to go with.

[Jason]

Like, I gave something away.

[Andy]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jason]

Because you'd rather steal from me than get the right pick.

[Andy]

Well, you reminded me of something that I think is the right pick. And you just reminded me. And so you helped me. Remember the Titans.

[Mike]

Oh, that's fun.

[Jason]

Is that a rewind?

[Andy]

Yeah, yeah, that's. It's based on a true story. Remember the Titans?

[Mike]

Is.

[Jason]

That's a good movie. I didn't know that that was real.

[Andy]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mike]

I don't even remember the plot.

[Andy]

I think the plot is the inclusion of like the segregated other.

[Mike]

Desegregated.

[Andy]

Okay. Yeah, the desegregation and then that's the best.

[Jason]

I think it's probably my favorite scene in movie. It's probably my favorite, like, sports movie. Football movie. Definitely my favorite football movie.

[Andy]

Yeah. Based on a true story. I didn't have it on my list until just then, but yeah, I'll go back to back sports and remember the Titans.

[Jason]

There was another sports one that I.

[Andy]

Yeah, I've got another sports one I was going to go with.

[Jason]

All right, Mike, your final pick. You have Apollo 13, Argo and Cool Runnings. Jason finished with Braveheart, the Wolf of Wall Street, A League of Their Own, and Remember the Titans.

[Mike]

So there are still a few really good ones. But I'm going to try and I'm trying to remember, like, the impact when I first saw it, so. And whatever. I'll just diversify my movie genres here a little bit. I'm gonna take Blackhawk Down. Black Hawk down in the theater.

[Andy]

Was.

[Mike]

That was an event that was so. It was intense from.

[Jason]

That was too intense for me.

[Mike]

It really was from start to finish. That movie was extremely intense.

[Jason]

I was like, yeah, not Able to handle it. That's a good pick. I have Catch Me if youf can, into the Wild on the Social Network. And I'm going to.

[Mike]

Yeah, the last one's hard.

[Jason]

I feel like I've already lost this draft, and that makes me want to be more focused not on the movie that people have seen as much, but on the best.

[Mike]

It should never be that. It should be your picks then.

[Jason]

I'm going to choose the combination of amazing film with amazing story. Jurassic Park, Society of the Snow.

[Mike]

Okay, I'm going to take Society. Have you seen it? You've talked about it at length, and there's two versions.

[Jason]

There's an old one that they did in the snow.

[Mike]

No one's alive.

[Jason]

What?

[Mike]

Oh, alive is, I believe. Oh.

[Jason]

The name of it. Yeah.

[Andy]

Alive is on my list.

[Jason]

Society of the Snow is the more recent one they made on Netflix, and it's based on the same story.

[Andy]

Yeah. That's where people eat people,

[Jason]

sort of.

[Mike]

That's really taking one part of the movie. But it's the survival of a sports team that crashes in the Andes mountains. Yeah.

[Jason]

In 1972. And they have to, like, basically survive an entire winter.

[Andy]

I just remember growing up and hearing about this movie.

[Mike]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Andy]

That was crazy.

[Mike]

Yes.

[Andy]

There was this true story of when people ate people. That's all I knew from it. Obviously, they were driven to that. Not like. Not like a hobby.

[Jason]

And they weren't alive when they were eating them.

[Andy]

Right, right. Which is. I feel like that's not fair to

[Mike]

name the movie Alive, but it's not eaten alive. It's more about staying alive.

[Jason]

The movie Eaten Alive.

[Andy]

Okay.

[Jason]

All right. Some other ones.

[Andy]

I'm sure we got a lot.

[Jason]

The other sports one I was going to mention was Moneyball.

[Andy]

Moneyball was what I planned to take until you reminded me of running.

[Jason]

And then some classics. The Big Short, which was amazing. And then Aaron Brockovich. I always loved that movie.

[Andy]

I never saw.

[Mike]

I've never seen it.

[Jason]

That'll make it harder to like.

[Andy]

Yeah. I mean.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Andy]

That won the Can't Give Opinions. Didn't that win Best Picture? Or did she just win Best Actress? Yeah.

[Jason]

Yeah. That was a great movie.

[Mike]

I had hidden figures. The story.

[Jason]

Awesome.

[Andy]

Yeah.

[Jason]

NASA.

[Mike]

Yes, NASA. With the three black women who are, like, huge part of it and they just don't get credit because we've done stupid stuff. I almost kept the DiCaprio run going because I found out Revenant is based off of a true story. And I like Revenant. I imagine that you trying to finish that movie? I imagine that you two do not like the Revenant. Never saw it. Don't see it.

[Andy]

Kept wanting to see.

[Mike]

Don't see it. Really.

[Jason]

If you started it a year ago, you'd almost be done with it.

[Mike]

You would watch it the same way you watch Blade Runner and go, this is stupid. And not much is happening. It's. It's more about the environment and, and oh my gosh, the soundtrack though is. The whole movie is incredible.

[Jason]

It's. It's an okay movie. Yeah, it's just, it's just, it's just a long slog, man. That movie just keeps going and going long and slow. I only actually thought of it during this. I didn't think it was a based on any true story. It must be loose.

[Mike]

I think it's just. Yeah. Based off of that.

[Jason]

Like a guy's the guy.

[Mike]

Like a break.

[Jason]

William Wallace.

[Andy]

I only knew one thing about that movie that you guys lied to me about. All right. I'm. I had a couple on my list. I had the the Pianist or Schindler's List. Awesome movies. They just, you know, they're not fun.

[Jason]

I hate calling movies like that awesome.

[Andy]

No, right?

[Jason]

Yes, but you can do it.

[Andy]

That's why it went undrafted.

[Mike]

Impact.

[Andy]

Okay. Yes, yes. Because it's a terrible, awful, horrendous true story. Captured well.

[Jason]

It's such a one time watch.

[Andy]

Yeah, yeah. They're not fun to watch.

[Jason]

If I watch it more than once, I'm like, that's not okay.

[Andy]

I Had a Beautiful Mind. Very good movie. Based on a true story. The Founder.

[Mike]

Huh? Oh, the founder's.

[Andy]

McDonald's.

[Jason]

Oh, that's a good movie.

[Mike]

The Founder is.

[Jason]

I love Michael Keaton.

[Mike]

I imagine that Ray Kroc is not very happy about that movie.

[Andy]

Ali, that was, you know, we didn't have any.

[Mike]

You had a huge list over.

[Andy]

Yeah, well, there's a lot of good ones. Cinderella man, the one that I thought was too loose. Even looser than Braveheart was the Patriot, apparently.

[Mike]

No, it's not.

[Andy]

It is loosely based on historical figures.

[Jason]

Based on the fact there was a revolutionary War.

[Andy]

No, no, I looked it up. It is loosely.

[Mike]

No, it is not.

[Jason]

Would you have counted Titanic?

[Mike]

Yes, of course.

[Jason]

Okay, that's where it's like. Yes, it's based on. I know, I know. The Titanic went down. I just meant like the entire story is made up.

[Mike]

Right.

[Andy]

And then walk hard. The Dewey Cox story. Those were my true story.

[Jason]

What is that?

[Andy]

Oh, you don't know. It's the story of Dewey Cox, the musician. He's very similar to Johnny Cash.

[Mike]

That one's not a true story.

[Andy]

No, that's what did we learn today?

[Jason]

What did we learn today? Cause I'm. I'm thinking nothing.

[Andy]

I learned that Mike is really good at Baller Dash. I mean, we were guessing every one of his clues.

[Mike]

I learned that there is maybe nothing sillier than a front half robot.

[Jason]

That's true. And I learned that Tom Hanks and DiCaprio are into the true story. So thanks for joining us. We'll be here next week. Mike will have the scat, we'll have a new draft, and we'll all have a good time.

[Mike]

Goodbye.

[Andy]

Thanks for listening to the Spitballers podcast to see what other nonsense the guys are up to. Check out spitballers pod.com.

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