Toasted Mold & Things That Are Clear - Spit Hits! - Comedy Podcast

Summary

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Spitballers Comedy Podcast

Episode: Toasted Mold & Things That Are Clear – Spit Hits!
Date: May 18, 2026

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Episode Overview

The Spitballers trio—Andy, Mike, and Jason—return for another laugh-filled episode. The main theme revolves around their signature clean, family-friendly banter as they tackle ridiculous "Would You Rather" scenarios, play their deceptive Ballerdash word game, and draft “things that are clear.” Along the way, they take comedic deep-dives on fridge horror stories, economic hypotheticals, and the difference between transparent and clear.

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Key Segments and Discussion Points

1. Intro & Scatology

Timestamps: 00:07–02:20

• Jason performs a quirky intro scat, while the others comment on his hat-wearing technique as part of the “scat zone.”
  • Quote:
    “I love threatening our audience, but they should know that we're all fun and games—until you don’t share.” – Andy (02:03)

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2. Would You Rather

Timestamps: 02:21–20:22

a. Everyone Gets $10 Million or Just You Get $10,000?

• Explores the world-altering consequences of giving everyone $10 million, notably hyperinflation.
  • “If you give everyone in the world, every person, $10 million, you are toast.” – Mike (02:52)
  • “A Big Mac is going to be like, you know, $50,000.” – Andy (03:13)
• They consult each other on how fast inflation would skyrocket post-windfall; guesses range to under a week.

b. Potatoes and Fridge Nightmares

• Spirals into a comedic debate about whether they’d prefer $10k or 60,000 potatoes.
• Discussion veers to the worst things they’ve ever found in a fridge:
  • “You clean out the fridge... there is usually something along the lines of what once was a zucchini or a cucumber. That thing starts melting and you gotta find a way to pick it up, but you can’t, ‘cause it’s like hot butter.” – Andy (07:01)
  • Furry cheese blocks, moldy bagels, and “liquefied” fridge objects get vivid descriptions.

c. Moldy Bread & Toasted Mold Survival Debate

• Mike wonders if toasting kills mold on bread.
• Andy carries out a live “research” search:
  • “Toasting bread is not going to kill the mold.” – Andy (09:22)
  • “While toasting can kill the mold, it does not neutralize the toxins that the mold produces.” – Al, quoting research (10:21)
  • This leads to a madcap hypothetical about "toasting a frog" and French cuisine (11:05–12:20).

d. Sent Back to High School—What Gift Would You Choose?

• Magic wizard scenario: Pick between top-tier athleticism, perfect charm, or academic genius in high school.
  • Overwhelming preference for athleticism, with classic Spitballers bluster (“Athlete, done deal!” – Jason, 13:15).
  • Mike makes the case for “unlimited charisma.”

e. Perceived as Unintelligent vs Insincere

• Which is worse? The crew weighs the social dynamics of each, ultimately leaning toward choosing “dumb but sincere.”
  • “Unintelligent is like, well, that’s who I am.” – Jason (16:24)
  • “I would definitely choose the dumb because … I think I’m so smart, guys.” – Andy (17:18)

f. The Awkward Tickling Dilemma

• Would you rather have to awkwardly tickle everyone you say goodbye to, or be tickled by everyone who says goodbye to you?
  • Universally, none wants to be the tickler – “You can’t pick tickling people.” – Andy (18:53)
  • They riff on social boundaries and share stories about a notoriously handsy waitress at a pizza joint.

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3. Ballerdash Game

Timestamps: 20:39–32:13

A game of deception where fake definitions, names, and acronyms are submitted alongside a real answer.

• Notable Ballerdash Moments:
  • Definition Round: "Pogonip"
    • None guess the correct answer (“thick fog in deep valleys during winter”).
  • Notable Person: "Frank B. Bennett"
    • Two guess “inventor of the Milk Bone dog biscuit” correctly.
  • Acronym: CBA
    • Actual answer: “Christian Bodybuilding Association.” All fall for each other’s fakes.
  • Movie Plot: "All the Way Boys"
    • The real answer (“a couple of bumbling adventurers crash land in the Andes Mountains”) is guessed by Andy.
  • Weird Law: Montana Table Dancing
    • Real law: “A woman could only dance on a table if she was wearing over three pounds of clothing.”

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4. The Spitballers Draft: “Things That Are Clear”

Timestamps: 32:44–49:24

Each “Spitballer” selects three “clear” things, aiming for both literal and comedic value.

• First Round Picks:

  • Jason: “Diamonds” (33:29)
  • Mike: “Crystal ball” (34:05)
  • Andy: “Water” (34:29)

• Notable Drafting Highlights:

  • Andy explains his obsession with “perfectly clear, large cube ice” (34:31), including the hardship of making artisanal ice at home.

  • Mike grabs “NBA backboard” (38:07) and “contact lenses” (40:43).

  • Jason selects “jellyfish” (39:07) and, humorously, “vodka” (40:13).

  • Debate erupts over the definitions of “clear,” “transparent,” and “translucent.”

    • “Clear means that you can see through it, and it is colorless. Transparent means you can see objects through it, but it may be [colored].” – Papa Josh (45:04)

  • Andy tries to deduce his co-hosts’ elusive “big as the world” clear pick—eventually, it’s revealed to be “the ozone layer/air” (46:11).

  • Jason cheekily drafts “clear skies” to close (45:12).

• Runner-Up Clear Things (off-list):

  • Packing tape, glass, sunglasses, Jello (“Jello is red!” – Andy, 46:39), car windshield, and others.

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Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

• “You ever pull one of those [potatoes] out of your fridge? Where all of a sudden, there’s a creature coming out of the potato.” – Andy (06:42)
• “Toasting bread is not going to kill the mold.” – Andy (09:22)
• “Do the French have a fancy frog cooking machine?” – Mike (11:53)
• “You want to go to Italy? … I really do. Genuinely.” – Andy (12:20)
• “Can you toast a frog? … A toaster will not kill frog venom.” – Andy & Mike, researching live (10:55–11:03)
• “Why did you pick ice?” / “No, clear, large cubed ice. There’s a difference!” – Andy & Mike (35:00)
• “He forgot he wasn’t drafting with the guys from his smoking lounge.” – Jason, ribbing Andy for ice obsession (37:06)
• “What are jellyfish? How are they?” – Jason (39:12)
• “You can’t see through anyone’s head...” – Andy, on drafting “a clear head" (46:04)
• “Clear means that you can see through it, and it is colorless.” – Josh (45:04)
• “The only thing that’s not clear are these definitions.” – Jason (47:37)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Segment | Timestamp Range | |--------------------------------------|-------------------------| | Intro, Scat & Announcements | 00:07–02:20 | | Would You Rather Section | 02:21–20:22 | | Ballerdash Game | 20:39–32:13 | | Spitballers Draft “Things That Are Clear”| 32:44–49:24 | | “What Did We Learn?” & Wrap-Up | 49:07–end |

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Final Thoughts

The episode is a showcase of the Spitballers’ unique group chemistry and improvisational wit. From economic doomsday hypotheticals to the pragmatic crisis of moldy cheese and artisanal ice cubes, their tangents always swing back to comedic gold.
Anyone interested in good-natured, goofy debates (that occasionally veer into pseudo-educational territory) is guaranteed a great time.

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Learn more: spitballerspod.com
Share this show (or else).

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Transcript

[Andy]

Foreign.

[Al]

What happens when three buffoons give life advice, explore unrealistic situations, and give random topics more thought than they probably deserve?

[Andy]

It's the Spitballers podcast with Andy, Mike, and Jason.

[Jason]

Wickety wickedy bickety boop bop a dinghy.

[Mike]

Wickedy wickedy.

[Jason]

Huh? That's the only I knew going in.

[Mike]

And the rest was my lickety splickety badingy.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[Andy]

Also explain the hat to me, because I didn't. I was unaware until you were halfway through your scat. I look up and I see in the monitor and your hat is resting on your nose. What was that about?

[Jason]

It was just to stay, like, hidden. Like, maybe the mystery. Maybe if I didn't look at you guys, maybe it would come out and it'd be really cool.

[Andy]

So were you keeping yourself away from the world or the world away from yourself?

[Jason]

It depended how the scat went.

[Mike]

Ah, he's in the scat zone.

[Jason]

I'm in the scat zone.

[Mike]

Jason, squee that badoop. No.

[Andy]

Get out of there, man. It's terrible in there.

[Mike]

It's just you and John.

[Jason]

Wickety, wickety. Lickety splicity. That's what I should have gone with. Welcome in. Would you rather Baller dash and a draft on today's episode of the Spitballers. Any Mike and Jason with you? We've got Al Borland in the building, Papa Josh the Falcon over there in Deucer's alley. Three dudes combining to do the job of half a man. So thank you. Thank you for being here. We will kick things off right here, right now. First, I'll remind you, you can follow the show at Spitballers Pod over on X and tell your friends and family about the podcast. We would really appreciate it. And you'll make. You'll make their life.

[Al]

Do it.

[Mike]

Or else.

[Andy]

Whoa. That was serious. I feel like I have to do it now. Yeah.

[Mike]

You want to know why?

[Andy]

Because I don't want to know why.

[Mike]

Or else.

[Andy]

Or else.

[Jason]

It's a new technique.

[Andy]

I love threatening our audience, but they

[Jason]

should know that we're all fun and games until.

[Andy]

Until you don't share.

[Jason]

Until the threats. So, like Mike said, share it or else. Here we go.

[Andy]

Would you rather.

[Jason]

All right, Cora from Patreon writing in. Would you rather every person in the world be given $10 million or only you are given $10,000? That's a weird question.

[Mike]

Cora is challenging our generosity. Except I don't think Cora understands how the economics of the world works.

[Jason]

Yeah, that would be a bit of an inflationary Situation.

[Mike]

If you give everyone in the world, every person, $10 million, you are toast.

[Andy]

Well, also, you did nothing because everything is going. I mean, if that's what everyone has.

[Mike]

I'm saying for you personally, yeah, like the world will stay close to the same, but you will have. You won't be able to afford a thing.

[Andy]

Well, yeah, a Big Mac is going to be like, you know, $50,000. Yeah.

[Jason]

The trick would be to spend it faster than the impact that you know, of the event for the other people. If everybody, let's say instantly everybody in their mailbox is $10 million. If I go out and spend my 10 million really, really quickly.

[Mike]

Oh.

[Jason]

Before inflation, before it all catches up. The 10 million, it's gonna take a while for 10 million not to feel like 10 million to the world.

[Mike]

It's everybody else. It's not you.

[Andy]

Now, here's the thing.

[Jason]

Oh, wait, it's not you at all.

[Andy]

Not you at all.

[Jason]

I thought it said everyone in the world.

[Andy]

No, it says.

[Mike]

Yeah, I get.

[Al]

I think you would be included.

[Jason]

Okay.

[Mike]

Oh, you're included.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[Al]

I'm saying that's how I interpreted it.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[Andy]

Well, yeah, I'm a spin that so quick.

[Jason]

I think you have to go spend it fast. Because if you all got it right now and I ran out, there's no way they're not taking my money.

[Andy]

No, you can go. You can go get something right now for $10 million that is worth that.

[Jason]

And then even the car salesman that's got the 10 million waiting for him at home doesn't know it yet.

[Andy]

If you went out and bought a $10 million house at current value, and then everyone's guilty right now, still got that house. You know how much a house? I'm going to turn around, sell that house.

[Mike]

Two years, flip that house. If you, if this happened, how long does it take for all prices to catch up?

[Jason]

If it happened and it was newsworthy?

[Mike]

Yeah, it's like, it's just a global event. It's. Holy crap.

[Jason]

Under a week.

[Mike]

I'm going under a week.

[Andy]

I mean, it would be quick. It would be very, very quick.

[Jason]

I think it's more the comprehension. I think it's more like, let's say you're a person that sells goods. How do you process that that fast? Right. Like we do the draft kit for the footballers. Like, okay, everybody instantly, like, what do we do with the. I wouldn't want know what to do exactly with the price. Right away, I'd be like, well, it's

[Andy]

different because ours is a digital product. But when you've got. I mean, your inventory, if you're all

[Jason]

right, you sell brick potato bricks.

[Andy]

You're about to be out of potatoes. You got no more potatoes to sell because everyone can buy them now, and everyone's buying up your potatoes. You got to make those last potatoes more expensive.

[Jason]

I mean, it's supply, demand.

[Andy]

Supply, demand. That's just. That's just common sense.

[Mike]

But I.

[Jason]

But what will your potatoes cost a couple days into this event?

[Andy]

I mean, they just keep going up until they stop selling, and then they go down a little.

[Jason]

You think potatoes would be rush items?

[Andy]

I don't. I don't think that that's what people are going to rush out for.

[Mike]

A vegetable that would make it a nightshade.

[Andy]

Truffle. I don't know. Is truffle a vegetable? I don't know.

[Mike]

No. No one knows.

[Jason]

Now, the falcon pigs find them. The falcon's like, well, if you have 10 million, do you really need profit? Is that what you just asked?

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Jason]

Yeah. I mean, you will, because you're gonna. Because everything's gonna cost way more, Right?

[Andy]

Exactly. If you hold on to that 10 million and everyone out there is a 10 millionaire, then you're just exactly the average person, and then costs will go up. I mean, that. Yeah. It's not. So just give me the $10,000.

[Mike]

Yeah. So the great news after all this is I now have $10,000. Yeah.

[Andy]

And you don't.

[Jason]

That's such a small.

[Mike]

Also, how many potatoes can I get with $10,000?

[Jason]

Well, the option is $10,000. All of them, or 60,000 potatoes.

[Mike]

That's your choice. Oh, man.

[Jason]

Would you take 60,000 potatoes over $10,000?

[Mike]

I don't think they go bad pretty quick.

[Andy]

They do. They sprout. They get stinky.

[Jason]

They stink.

[Mike]

Also, you ever pulled one of those out of your fridge? Yeah. Where they. Where all of a sudden, there's a creature coming out of the potato.

[Andy]

What's the worst thing you've pulled out of your fridge?

[Mike]

Oh, I mean, that's pretty.

[Andy]

I know what comes to mind.

[Mike]

Please, please do share.

[Andy]

This isn't. This isn't. A proud. This isn't a proud moment.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Jason]

All right.

[Andy]

But, you know, you go and you do that. You clean out the fridge thing, and then you get to the back part of the drawer that has been full for a long time, and there is usually something along the lines of what once was a zucchini or a cucumber.

[Jason]

You're saying it's liquefied?

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Andy]

That thing starts melting and you gotta. You gotta find a way to. To pick it up, but you can't. Cause it's like hot butter. I mean, I'm gloving up, you know.

[Jason]

You want to throw the drawer out,

[Andy]

I want to throw the fridge out. I don't want to get a new

[Jason]

drawer in there before you even answered it. I was going to say, it would have been something that liquefied. It would have been something hiding back there that just became a new substance. It's not a liquid, it's not a solid, it's not a gas. The vegetables, it's olives.

[Andy]

The vegetables are worse than the meat because the meat stinks. But the meat is usually packaged. It's in something. So if you didn't cook up your chicken breast, it's wrapped in cellophane and you could see it's nasty. But the vegetables, they're exposed. At best, you were lazy enough to not take it out of the little bag you put it in in the grocery store. But usually the vegetables are out in the open and you don't want those things going bad.

[Mike]

That and like a real furry block of cheese.

[Jason]

Oh, yeah, yeah, those are.

[Mike]

Those said a couple.

[Andy]

You ever named them?

[Mike]

I have not. Is that a good technique?

[Andy]

Oh, yeah. I mean, when you get. If you. If you've got enough fur to go, you know, to the groomers, then you deserve a name. That's. That's how I. That's how I look at it.

[Jason]

So. Yeah. Yeah. Furry cheese, for sure. I saved my son from a. From making a bagel the other day. He was walking through the fridge and he's about to cook the bagel up, and I looked at it and I was like, that's covered in mold. And he was just gonna eat it.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Jason]

So I felt like I did a good deed.

[Mike]

So if you put, like, how does I know mold can. It's like it can survive a lot. But can mold survive a toaster?

[Jason]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mike]

I mean, like, what kind. What type of heat do we have to deactivate or kill the mold? I don't.

[Jason]

I don't know enough about mold to know if it can be deactivated, it will still be there. But you're saying whether it's dangerous.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Jason]

Like, if you, if you put mold a moldy piece of bread in a microwave for a minute.

[Andy]

Bad news, guys.

[Jason]

That's probably still living.

[Andy]

Toasting bread is not going to kill the mold. That's.

[Jason]

That's all you got.

[Andy]

Terrible.

[Mike]

Mold can survive. Oh, how hot does a toaster get?

[Jason]

What about Microwave.

[Andy]

Let me. I'm on it.

[Mike]

Oh, did someone answer, how hot does a toaster get?

[Andy]

Someone answer that like someone's just got the answer. Oh, it's usually like 285 degrees.

[Al]

It says about 500 degrees.

[Mike]

And molds, like, no problem.

[Jason]

It can go up to that. Yeah. I mean, mold.

[Andy]

Dang.

[Mike]

Mold's cool.

[Andy]

Molds got.

[Mike]

They got it going on.

[Andy]

Most molds are usually killed by heat at temperature between 140, 160 degrees. I mean, come on. Toaster's got that covered.

[Mike]

I would think so.

[Jason]

But it's how long it's at that temperature. That's what normally makes a difference is how long it's.

[Mike]

I mean, a minute, Right?

[Jason]

I don't know. I see people questioning, why is it so hard to kill mold?

[Al]

I see that this says, while toasting can kill the mold, it does not neutralize the toxins that the mold produces.

[Mike]

Ah, there we go. Okay.

[Jason]

Yeah, because you could kill.

[Andy]

Always toxic.

[Jason]

Yeah. Like, if you kill something, it could be dead, like a plant. But the plant could. You eat that plant, you're still going to die.

[Andy]

Right. If it's a poisonous frog.

[Jason]

Right. You can.

[Andy]

The frog can be killed. You didn't get rid of the poison.

[Jason]

Put the frog in the toast.

[Mike]

Yeah, hold on.

[Andy]

I'm on it.

[Jason]

You can't eat the toasted frog.

[Mike]

How long you can toast a frog?

[Andy]

A toaster will not kill frog venom.

[Mike]

Frogmole.

[Jason]

It won't kill frog venom?

[Mike]

No, it'll kill a frog.

[Andy]

Yeah, the frogs toast.

[Jason]

How long can you toast a frog without it dying? Okay. Toasting the frog without causing harm or death is not feasible or ethical. Just so you know.

[Andy]

That's good advice.

[Mike]

Who's the party pooper over there?

[Andy]

Chad Ba Chat, GPT.

[Jason]

Frogs are living creatures with sensitive skin and delicate biology. Subjecting them to heat or any form

[Mike]

of quote toasting

[Jason]

can quickly lead to severe stress, injury, or death. So don't do that.

[Andy]

Well, what if the frog was already dead? Because people eat frogs. You know what I mean? I'm not buying a frog to kill it to eat it, but if I want frog legs, do you want to toast them? I would rather than raw.

[Mike]

Do the French have a fancy frog cooking machine?

[Jason]

The French?

[Andy]

Oh, that's where they. You eat frogs?

[Mike]

Yeah, that's only. That's the only people I know.

[Jason]

Frog legs are French.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Jason]

They've got so much good food. Why are they doing that?

[Mike]

Snails and frog legs. That's cargo and baguettes. Don't you know anything about the French?

[Jason]

I'll be honest. I was kind of conflating the French and the Italians in my head for a minute. Like, the Italians wouldn't be caught dead with frog legs, right?

[Andy]

They got pasta and good stuff.

[Mike]

You want to go to Italy?

[Andy]

Yeah, I really do. I genuinely do. If anyone can get me to Italy, I'm open.

[Jason]

I would love to do that. Let's go.

[Andy]

I want to eat a ton of fresh pasta.

[Jason]

You want to go right now? Yeah. Mike, you got this.

[Mike]

I guess I'm going to France.

[Jason]

No, you got to do the show. Cora from Patreon. We answered your question. Bryn from Patreon. Your local wizard appears.

[Mike]

Oh, not again.

[Jason]

Your local wizard appears, has announced.

[Andy]

Oh, great job, Al.

[Jason]

Why don't you read this one? Typos mean you get to read them.

[Al]

Your local wizard appears and he has announced that he is sending you back to your freshman year of high school. But he will give you your choice of the following gifts.

[Jason]

Okay.

[Al]

Would you rather have insane top tier athleticism that ensures you are the starter at whatever position you want?

[Jason]

Oh, man.

[Al]

Perfect charm that attracts your crush and easily persuades others.

[Andy]

I already had it. Go on.

[Al]

Or academic genius that easily has you graduating at the top of your class?

[Jason]

Athlete.

[Andy]

Yeah, it's definitely athlete.

[Jason]

Athlete, done deal. Athlete will come with the other things. Yeah, the grades will start to look better when the. When my coaches.

[Andy]

Girls, you're dumb as a rock. You have no charm. It's like you're the quarterback.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Jason]

Check this charm out.

[Mike]

Swish.

[Andy]

Exactly. Very charming.

[Jason]

I'm going athlete.

[Andy]

Yeah. And since I already had the charm, the only thing left is academic, so I think I'm good here. Mike.

[Jason]

What are you picking a face Mike gave you?

[Mike]

Athlete is.

[Andy]

You're my high school. You knew?

[Jason]

I knew you didn't have the academics. I met you in a freshman Spanish class.

[Andy]

Yeah, you were missing that one.

[Mike]

I mean, the athletics is really appealing, but man had to have just unlimited charisma because it's not just you with.

[Andy]

Dude, it's awesome.

[Mike]

It's not.

[Andy]

Mike. It is everything. That's the one I would have picked.

[Mike]

Not just you trying to pull in the ladies. You can easily persuade others.

[Andy]

It worked on teachers. Everybody from faculty to janitors to. Okay, so then just upperclassmen.

[Mike]

What in the world happened?

[Andy]

I got fat, man. I got married. Went downhill, let myself go. I just stopped.

[Mike]

So you're on your way back?

[Andy]

I'm on my way back.

[Mike]

I'm all in big trouble here.

[Andy]

Well, no, it's going to be good for you. My Charm is going to, you know, Rising tide, so we're going to be good.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Jason]

This has become something different, I think. Which one are you going to take?

[Mike]

I think I'm going to take the charm.

[Jason]

Okay.

[Andy]

It would be.

[Jason]

You would have to talk to other people, though.

[Mike]

Not much.

[Jason]

That's part of it.

[Mike]

Not much.

[Jason]

Oh, you just got one line or something.

[Mike]

It's just perfect. I said, do you. But it doesn't matter because I'm rolling Nat 20s all the time.

[Andy]

I wonder if you would enjoy those moments and talking to people more if you were just.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Jason]

If you were more charming.

[Andy]

Naturally charming.

[Mike]

When I got to turn it on, it's unlimited.

[Jason]

Okay. This is the weirdest. Would you rather.

[Mike]

Self grandization. It runs on nitro, so it's like the gas tank burns out real fast.

[Jason]

Oh. So you can just. You can turn it on, but.

[Mike]

Oh, yeah, once a year.

[Jason]

All right, Brian from Patreon, would you rather have everything you say be perceived as unintelligent or be perceived as insincere?

[Andy]

Oh, man.

[Jason]

Insincere is a weird descriptor. Like, that's not like you're never. I have, actually, I have a couple people that I know. They cannot. Maybe it's not really insincere, but they can't. They can't say something sincere. They can't say something without it being tongue in cheek or a joke. There is no serious.

[Andy]

So there's also another side of being insincere, you know, that you just feel like people are really fake. You just feel like everything they do, how they act, their laugh, their. It's their niceness, whatever it is, is just. It's all phony. It's for show. I can't stand that.

[Jason]

But if you're. If you're perceived as unintelligent or insincere, one of them seems more contrived and one seems accidental. Unintelligent is like, well, that's who I am.

[Andy]

Yeah, I am. I like Dooser's Alley. Right. Go to Dooser's Alley. I like all three of those guys,

[Jason]

you know, and they're doing the best

[Andy]

they can and they are sincere. And so I feel like this question kind of answers itself because I respect them because they're not insincere.

[Jason]

But, I mean, they're not insincere.

[Andy]

The intelligence side.

[Mike]

I'm not going to be dumb.

[Jason]

Yeah, me neither.

[Andy]

I will be dumb. I would definitely choose the dumb because I think if I. If I look at it as, here's someone else.

[Mike]

You don't know you're dumb.

[Andy]

Exactly.

[Jason]

I currently think you probably think you're really smart.

[Andy]

I think I'm so smart, guys.

[Mike]

Yeah. Okay, Most.

[Andy]

And I'm happy.

[Mike]

Yeah, there is a good part.

[Andy]

I'm happy living here.

[Mike]

Maybe. Maybe you're happy.

[Andy]

Now, here's the thing. There are dumb people that you like, but that doesn't necessarily mean that you view them like everything they say is unintelligent.

[Mike]

Yeah, that's fair.

[Andy]

So this question is even worse. This question is different.

[Jason]

Yeah, dumb and unintelligent are different.

[Andy]

This is something where when you're going around and you're saying things, everyone is rolling their eyes going like, oh, my gosh. Yeah, what an idiot.

[Jason]

No, you can't watch a YouTube video and remove a gallbladder.

[Andy]

Right.

[Jason]

You know what I mean?

[Andy]

Yeah.

[Jason]

You know what I mean?

[Andy]

That's really unintelligent to think that

[Al]

I'm

[Mike]

going to be insincere.

[Jason]

Am I getting no smiles back there?

[Mike]

Oh, Josh is.

[Andy]

Papa Josh didn't like that joke.

[Al]

You were getting smiles from the two people that you weren't referring to.

[Jason]

All right, wait.

[Andy]

Go to Papa Josh real quick. Papa Josh, do you believe that if you watched a YouTube video of how to remove a gallbladder, you could successfully and safely perform a gallbladder surgery easily? And I believe he's sincere.

[Jason]

You said you could land a plane. We'll move on.

[Andy]

I can land a plane from. Plane basically lands itself.

[Jason]

Mateo, from the website, would you rather. What happened? Would you rather have to awkwardly tickle everyone you say goodbye to?

[Andy]

No.

[Jason]

Or be tickled by everyone who says goodbye to you?

[Andy]

You have to pick. I mean, you can't pick tickling people.

[Mike]

Do you want to assault people?

[Andy]

You can't pick tickling people.

[Mike]

There's.

[Andy]

None of us are allowed to pick tickling. Especially people you just met. I mean, you say, goodby. Oh, nice to meet you. I'm not the Pillsbury Doughboy. Like, you cannot awkwardly tickle people. You see.

[Jason]

What about a back rub on the way out?

[Andy]

Oh, man. No. The touchy feely people out there, they exist where they're just, you know, they don't have the social bubble that everyone has.

[Mike]

No.

[Jason]

And they get so close.

[Andy]

They're so close. And the people that are so close, they're handsy, too. I know. We used to go to lunch at a place where there was. Yeah, you already know. There was a waitress. Yeah, she was a nice waitress.

[Jason]

I feel like that was a proportional amount of handsy.

[Andy]

Oh, my gosh. I mean, you Knew whose order, whose turn it was because she's rubbing your back.

[Jason]

It's like, it's not appropriate.

[Andy]

It was very. Now imagine tickling. Now imagine she's tickling.

[Jason]

I like, I wanted the pizza. I didn't want the side.

[Andy]

Oh, man. I mean, man have a social bubble, people.

[Jason]

I was so happy to not remember that.

[Andy]

I know. That was. It was like we. I mean, they had great pizza. So it's like, oh, man, I hope they're not working today.

[Mike]

I'm going to sit on the inside, guys.

[Andy]

We would definitely try to get the inside seat.

[Mike]

I'm selfless today, guys.

[Jason]

I'll be wearing shoulder pads with spikes on.

[Andy]

I'm going to go to the restroom. Get me a slice and six wings.

[Jason]

Oh, my gosh. All right, we'll take a break. We'll be back with some ballerdash.

[Andy]

What time is it? Game time.

[Jason]

All right. We have been given five prompts from five different categories Ballers gave. We gave Alex our answers prior to the show. He's going to go ahead and read our answers along with the real answer. It's our job to identify whether what. Basically what the real answer is. We've never explained properly in our life.

[Andy]

And try to trick the others into

[Mike]

guessing all this we stuff over there.

[Al]

That's right.

[Andy]

You've never introd any of them.

[Al]

You will get two points if you guess the correct answer and one point if an opponent guesses your answer. And those five categories are definition, notable person, acronym movie plot, and weird laws.

[Jason]

All right, sounds good.

[Al]

All right, we're going to start with that definition. The word is pogo nip. P O G O N I P. Pogonip. Pogo nip is that a thick fog that forms in deep valleys during the winter. Canadian slang term for a blizzard that lasts a short period of time.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Al]

The tiny remaining pieces when a sugary liquid crystallizes. Or a pungent smelling bush that grows in the ozarks.

[Mike]

Dang, man, I like the ozarks part.

[Jason]

All right, so a thick pogo nip fog, Canadian blizzard.

[Mike]

The pieces of the liquid.

[Jason]

The crystallized sugars.

[Mike]

Yeah. Or the boosh in the ozarks.

[Jason]

I'm taking the ozarks. The boosh. Do we rotate? Is that how we normally do it?

[Mike]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jason]

All right, I'll start then. I'm going to take the ozarks.

[Mike]

Okay. So then I'm up next. Poganip.

[Andy]

I don't think Canadians would say pogonip.

[Mike]

Pogonip.

[Andy]

Say it like a Canadian one.

[Jason]

Pogonip.

[Mike]

Pogo nip.

[Andy]

Yeah, it don't work.

[Mike]

Pogo. Pogo nip. That's better. I'm going to go with that one. I'm going to go with the Canadian one.

[Andy]

Really?

[Mike]

That one's fun.

[Andy]

Oh, man. I was going to go sugar crystals, but the way that Andy said it when he was reading it back made me think it was his. I like the answer the best. I'm going to go sugar crystals.

[Al]

You guys are all getting one point for somebody guessing each one of your answers. Nobody guessed. The correct answer was the fog was a thick fob. Fog that forms in deep valleys during the winter.

[Andy]

That's a pogo.

[Mike]

I was.

[Jason]

I was the Canadian one.

[Al]

Yeah. Mike was the sugar crystals, and Jason was the ozark.

[Jason]

Wow. Nice.

[Mike]

I knew the Ozarks in there. Like, this is. That's too much.

[Andy]

All right.

[Jason]

I was hoping it was. Yeah. All right, what's the next one? A notable person.

[Al]

That is correct. And our notiful notable person is Frank B. Bennett.

[Mike]

Oh, Frank Bennett.

[Al]

What was Frank Bennett known for? Was he a man known for having hands larger than his forearms?

[Mike]

Come on, man.

[Andy]

It's not a real thing.

[Al]

The first person to circumnavigate the globe on a boat with no sails of any kind was just rowing that people have.

[Mike]

So people are on a motor, maybe.

[Andy]

I know that there have been people who have taken, like, a canoe globally, but then you see the canoe and you're like, that's not a. That's a big boat.

[Mike]

All right.

[Al]

Was Frank Bennett known for inventing the milk bone? Dog biscuit.

[Mike]

Okay. Dog biscuits.

[Al]

Or was Frank Bennett a doo wop singer from the. From the 50s that had a run of number one hits.

[Andy]

No, I mean, I. Obviously when. When this came across, because we've all made up one of these answers. We all want it. Frank Bennett sounds like some old. What are they?

[Jason]

Sinatra mixed with the rat pack?

[Al]

Tony Bennett.

[Andy]

Tony Bennett. Exactly. So, no, it's not that. I was like, don't be a singer. Don't be a crooner. This can't be that obvious.

[Jason]

I'm with you on that. So I guess you get his lock yours in first.

[Mike]

I'm up first. Okay. So it's not the doo wop one. We got dog biscuits. We got the boat and the hands bigger than the forearms.

[Andy]

Yeah.

[Jason]

Yep.

[Mike]

I don't care if it's right. I'm gonna take the hands.

[Andy]

That can't be it. Because that can't exist. That can't be a real. No one has ever had a hand.

[Mike]

I Don't care. It's too funny. It's too funny.

[Andy]

I'm gonna go with dog biscuit.

[Jason]

That's. I'm gonna go dog bone. I'm gonna go dog bone.

[Al]

All right. The correct answer was inventing the milk bone. Dog biscuit.

[Mike]

All right.

[Andy]

I thought for sure my laughing of the hands would get you to.

[Al]

I was gonna say Jason laying on thick. His own. His own.

[Jason]

You were.

[Al]

He made up the hands larger than the forearms.

[Jason]

Yeah, that was you.

[Al]

So Jason, I believe, gets three that round. And he gets two.

[Andy]

No, I do want to see a man with Yo.

[Al]

Yeah, that's correct.

[Andy]

I do.

[Jason]

Mike picked his.

[Mike]

No, I didn't pick. No, I picked the hands.

[Al]

Yeah, that's Jason.

[Andy]

Yeah, that's mine.

[Al]

So Jason gets one point for that and two points for the correct answer.

[Andy]

Beautiful.

[Mike]

Okay, good work.

[Jason]

All right, amazing.

[Al]

So we are moving on to the acronym. The acronym is C. B. A is cba. The Chocolate Berry Association.

[Mike]

Come on, man.

[Al]

Is it Callback artists?

[Andy]

What?

[Mike]

Okay.

[Al]

Catholic Basketball association or Christian Bodybuilding Association?

[Mike]

Okay, Jason's first.

[Andy]

I'm gonna go chocolate berries. Delicious.

[Jason]

Callback artists.

[Mike]

I will go the Catholic one.

[Al]

You guys have done it again. You each get one point for guessing somebody else's answer. The real one. The Christian Bodybuilding Association.

[Jason]

Oh, my God.

[Andy]

I felt like because there was both a Christian and a Catholic, like, that was just where our minds went and that.

[Jason]

I almost went. I invented the Catholic Basketball Association. I almost went the Christian Basketball Association.

[Andy]

Oh, that would have been very close,

[Jason]

but that would have been weird.

[Al]

All right, so Mike was the chocolate Chocolate Barry. Jason was the callback artist. Andy was Catholic basketball. You each get one point. There.

[Jason]

We did it again.

[Mike]

Boys, when you have an acronym and the last one is A, it's like association. How do you. Can't think of a possible other word that's fair.

[Al]

So through the first three, we are sitting with Jason with five points, Andy with four points, Mike with two points, and we are moving on to the movie plot.

[Jason]

Oh, boy, these are fun.

[Al]

The name of the movie is all the Way Boys all the Way. I don't know how. How to inflict that properly, but it's all the way, comma, boys.

[Andy]

All the way, boys. All right, I got you.

[Al]

Is that a war drama set in the hills of eastern Poland and the first movie to feature actors that were actual veterans in World War II?

[Jason]

All the way, Boys.

[Al]

Was it a documentary on Sweden's men's volleyball gold medal trip in 1996?

[Jason]

Okay, volleyball. Swedish volleyball.

[Mike]

I don't Know all the Way Boys?

[Al]

Or is that a couple of bumbling adventurers crash land an airplane in the Andes mountains?

[Jason]

There's no way one of you guys didn't come up with the word bumbling. There's no way. I'm not voting for that one.

[Al]

And lastly is all the Way Boys. A group of childhood friends makes a pact to join the police together, but their family dynamic is rattled when one of them makes captain, leaving the others behind.

[Andy]

I know you read these from small cards, man. I just can't believe that that answer can fit on it. What was that last one again?

[Al]

A group of childhood friends makes a pact to join the police together, but their family dynamic is rattled when one of them makes captain, leaving the others behind.

[Jason]

I mean, childhood friends feels like something you doofuses would write right next to bumbling. Now I'm, like, leaning towards the war drama or the last one, man.

[Andy]

Could people. I mean, I feel like having actual survivors. Was that World War I?

[Al]

World War II. Okay, WW a war drama set in the hills of eastern Poland and the first movie to feature actors that were actual veterans in World War II.

[Andy]

That feels difficult.

[Jason]

All the Way boys. I guess I'll go that stupid long one at the end, but I am on the edge.

[Al]

All right, Andy is going with the police.

[Jason]

The friends.

[Mike]

Police one.

[Andy]

You're up, Mike.

[Mike]

I know they're all really bad, including my own. I'm going to go. I'll just pick the one I like the most. It's the Swedish volleyball team.

[Jason]

There you go.

[Andy]

I'm going to go with the Andes Mountain bumbling. Was that the bumbling?

[Al]

That is correct. Yeah. A couple bumbling adventures crash land on an airplane into the Andes Mountains. Yeah, that is the correct answer. So Jason's gonna get three points because Mike also guessed his answer was of the Sweden.

[Mike]

It was the funniest one.

[Andy]

All the Way Boys.

[Jason]

Mine was too serious and wasn't funny enough.

[Al]

Mike is gonna get one point because Andy guessed Mike's answer of the police friendship.

[Andy]

It just didn't seem realistic that they could have had in a drama, not in a documentary series. In a drama, they're gonna have actual people from World War II, like, older than this drama.

[Jason]

It was filmed really quite, quite soon

[Mike]

after movies in the 50s and the 40s.

[Jason]

There's definitely some World War II people that got into the movie business, man.

[Mike]

It was a very believable answer.

[Al]

All right, we're going into the fifth round.

[Jason]

Is it double?

[Al]

Jason is a strong favorite. It's not double points, but why Would

[Jason]

I double point in the last round?

[Al]

And he can still tie it up if he gets it correct and both people guess his answer.

[Mike]

Ooh.

[Al]

We got Jason with eight, Andy with four, Mike with three. Who is, I believe, no longer in this competition. The weird law. In Helena, Montana, an old law stated that a woman could only dance on a table if she was.

[Jason]

Yeah, where's it.

[Andy]

Where is that?

[Al]

There.

[Andy]

Don't do that to me.

[Al]

What is it? Helena.

[Mike]

Yeah, there you go. Like Helena Troy.

[Al]

All right. In Helena, Montana, an old law stated that a woman could only dance on a table if she was over the age of 50.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Al]

Wearing over three pounds of clothing.

[Andy]

Three pounds.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Jason]

The weight of the clothing.

[Al]

Wearing athletic footwear.

[Jason]

Okay.

[Al]

Or celebrating her engagement, not the marriage.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Jason]

Over 53 pounds of clothing is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

[Andy]

Yeah. Because the only way that you know if it's legal or not is we gotta weigh those clothes.

[Mike]

Yeah. That's inappropriate.

[Andy]

Why don't you put those clothes over on that side?

[Mike]

Oh, my gosh.

[Andy]

That's. There's a. There's a problem there.

[Mike]

Absolutely not. But also, that's the answer. They'll take the three pounds.

[Andy]

Well, you know what? I'm going to give Andy a shot here. I will take. Because if I guessed anything other than £3, then Andy can't win.

[Mike]

Right.

[Andy]

But I like that answer the best because you'd have to take the clothes off to measure. Makes no sense. So I will guess three pounds. It is potential that if that is Andy's answer, he can win. Andy, what are you going with?

[Jason]

I'll do the athletic footwear.

[Al]

The correct answer was wearing over three pounds of clothing.

[Jason]

Oh, my.

[Al]

So Jason and Mike each get two points for that, and then Mike actually gets one more point for the wearing athletic footwear, which was his answer.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Al]

There you go.

[Mike]

You passed.

[Al]

We're gonna.

[Jason]

We're gonna.

[Andy]

Second place.

[Mike]

Never.

[Al]

Jason with 10, Mike with six.

[Mike]

Oh, 10. And that's Domino.

[Jason]

Who made these rules?

[Al]

It was an old law in Helena, Montana.

[Jason]

You gotta weigh yourself before and after you put your clothes on, I guess. Okay. We'll take weirdos back with the draft.

[Andy]

The Spitballers draft.

[Jason]

We are drafting things that are clear. All right.

[Andy]

Okay.

[Jason]

That's. That's what we've been told. We're drafting things. We. Things that are clear. And I have the first pick.

[Mike]

Oh, man. You lucky dog.

[Andy]

I know. There's a clear 101.

[Mike]

Oh, I see what you did. It's clear.

[Jason]

I have kind of two things that I that came to mind when I thought about things in the world that are clear that I would want to draft. And so I had a first thought and then I had a second thought, and I'm gonna go with the second thought. There's an expression, crystal clear, and it applies to my pick. Diamonds.

[Mike]

Ooh.

[Jason]

Taking diamonds.

[Andy]

It's not a bad. It's not a bad. It's not the one on one, but it's not a bad pick.

[Jason]

I mean, there's. Clarity is literally one of the factors of evaluating a diamond.

[Mike]

So it's one of the.

[Andy]

One of the Cs.

[Mike]

One of the Cs, huh?

[Jason]

Yeah. So I'm going to go with diamonds. I feel like that's a good answer.

[Andy]

It's on the list. It is a good answer. It's probably the most valuable of everything that's going to be drafted.

[Jason]

We do add these up and make sure they weigh more than three pounds of gold.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Andy]

Or else get off that table.

[Jason]

Mike, you are up.

[Mike]

I thought you were going to take my pick, which is clearly and obviously a crystal ball.

[Andy]

Oh, the one on one falls to me.

[Mike]

Yeah. The one on one in the clear draft. Jason, congratulations. Enjoy your boring pick, Chris. I'll take a crystal ball, baby. A crystal ball.

[Andy]

A crystal ball. It's on my list. I like it a lot.

[Jason]

So we both chose crystals.

[Andy]

You both chose clear things.

[Jason]

Yeah, but I mean, crystal clear.

[Andy]

Yeah.

[Jason]

Jason, what are you taking?

[Andy]

Well, I'm going to take the thing that we can't live without. We will literally die without water. And if you think about clear things, I'm taking H2O.

[Mike]

Yeah. Yeah. Snooze fest.

[Andy]

And now for my second pick. For my second pick, I am also taking H2O. No. I am taking a perfectly clear, large cube of ice. I have tried for years to perfect this.

[Jason]

I have stopped adjacent answer.

[Andy]

I have. This is. This is an important.

[Jason]

And I just want to.

[Mike]

I want to make sure I understand. I made a joke about you being basic and you're going to take ice, and you said, no clear ice.

[Andy]

No, I said clear, large cubed ice. There's a difference. Mike. I have spent a lot of time, money, energy, and effort to try to create perfectly clear, large cubes for my whiskey glasses.

[Mike]

How do they do it?

[Andy]

It is darn near impossible. You basically have to either do it inside of a cooler inside of a freezer, or you have to actually have a giant block of ice and you chop it down into the cubes. It's so hard. Which is why when I go to restaurants, and all of them seem to have it. I'm like, how do you do this?

[Jason]

Do you want to know how they do it?

[Andy]

I know. I asked them. Artisan ice.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Jason]

There are.

[Andy]

There's a company here. I started just buying them.

[Jason]

There are companies like Kristoff. There are companies that make millions of dollars a year manufacturing ice and cutting it into small cubes and selling it and shipping it.

[Andy]

Worth it. It's impossible to do on your own.

[Jason]

No, wait. It doesn't make the drink more cold. It just is something for you to look at.

[Andy]

Well, it looks better, but it makes the drink not too cold, because if you put ice in there, it just dilutes.

[Mike]

But what if it was the foggy piece of ice?

[Jason]

Yeah, that's what I say. The fog doesn't affect your drink.

[Andy]

Well, no, I disagree. I think that there is a visual and an aromatic. All of these come in, too, but

[Mike]

the aromatic affected by the fogginess of the ice.

[Andy]

The visual is affected by the fogginess of the visual.

[Jason]

Doesn't affect the smell.

[Mike]

So you see the smell.

[Andy]

If I look at something and I think it looks appetizing, it is likely to taste better than if I look at something unappetizing.

[Mike]

I gotcha.

[Andy]

This looks fancy. It looks regal. My nose is in the air. Sure. But I mean, this is when I tried to put a list together of, like, clear. I have tried to get clear.

[Mike]

You're the most boring stuff.

[Andy]

Yeah, I just was like, what's the most boring stuff? Nailed it. I got water and frozen water.

[Jason]

He forgot he wasn't drafting with the guys from his smoking lounge.

[Mike]

Can you. Like, the water has to make a difference.

[Andy]

The water does make a difference.

[Mike]

I mean, Arizona water. Arizona water is just. It's the worst.

[Andy]

It's the. It's the worst water imaginable.

[Mike]

It's like little pebbles.

[Andy]

I mean, you. I feel like I have to replace shower heads every couple years because they're just. They're clogged. They're just. You can't spray straight.

[Jason]

Oh, man. Mike, you are back on the clock. All right, you lucky dog.

[Mike]

So, shoot. Water and ice are frozen.

[Jason]

Water are gone.

[Andy]

Available. Also, steam's not clear. So all water is completely gone.

[Mike]

Oh, man. I messed up big time.

[Andy]

Yeah, you did. I mean, you guys had pigs before me.

[Mike]

I just want to make sure that it's clear. Well, it's just like, is this the one? The pick that I want to go with. I'm going to go with. I'm going to take an NBA backboard.

[Andy]

Oh, that was. That was like my sneaky pick that I thought was going to get back to me.

[Mike]

Well, maybe you shouldn't have taken ice.

[Jason]

Well, no, he did not take ice.

[Mike]

Giant clear ice.

[Jason]

A perfectly clear, large cube of ice.

[Andy]

Yes, I did, and it's a great answer.

[Jason]

He doesn't get the perfectly clear part at the front of that answer.

[Andy]

That is part of what I'm drafting. I have tried, and my issue.

[Mike]

We're all drafting clear things. Okay. No. Then I.

[Jason]

Can I fix my perfectly clear diamond, please?

[Mike]

I would like to take a.

[Andy]

That's a better diamond.

[Mike]

An unpainted clear NBA backboard.

[Andy]

Perfect. Write it in.

[Mike]

I don't know his plexiglass.

[Jason]

The clear should be implied here. Yeah, NBA backboard.

[Andy]

You get.

[Mike]

You take that word clear out of the dock, Jeremy. Nonsense. I'll give him large. I'm not giving. I'm not going. Perfectly clear, though. Get that out of there.

[Jason]

I agree. I agree completely.

[Mike]

I'll do it myself.

[Jason]

Also, no paragraphs. Is your answer. My two. My two questions. My two answers here. I'm going to go with jellyfish.

[Mike]

Oh, that's. That's where I was. I was really torn of. Do I go jellyfish or backboard? Which one will make it back?

[Jason]

And it was jellyfish. I'm going to go with what. I mean, what a good pick animal to come in contact to, but a cool one to look at, Right? It doesn't make sense. How are they? Is the question.

[Mike]

Yeah, yeah.

[Jason]

How are they? What are the.

[Andy]

What are the.

[Mike]

They don't make sense.

[Jason]

No. And they eat things. Tell me about that. What?

[Mike]

That's so weird.

[Andy]

So if they eat something, you can see it?

[Mike]

Yeah, I suppose. It's like when the blob, does it

[Andy]

disappear or like it's microscopic. Do they eat, like, a shrimp?

[Jason]

It's too small.

[Mike]

I don't know how it works. No one does.

[Jason]

Papa Josh, mine.

[Mike]

Oh, a marine biologist. Talk to us about jellyfish.

[Andy]

Those things are weird, man. They're aliens.

[Mike]

Good answer. Good answer.

[Jason]

All right, for my.

[Mike]

There was a chapter on it. That's all it said.

[Jason]

For my third one, I am going to dip into Jason's, you know, territory here. Ooh, I'm going to take vodka.

[Mike]

Oh, okay.

[Jason]

I'm going to take vodka. So diamonds, jellyfish, and vodka. That's my world. All right, Mike, now, perfectly clear vodka

[Mike]

is what I'm talking about. Of course, of course.

[Jason]

That foggy stuff.

[Andy]

Yeah, you don't want the foggy.

[Mike]

Well, also top shelf. Don't forget that.

[Jason]

Yeah. We're not taking things that are foggy.

[Andy]

What do you want, a plastic bottle?

[Mike]

Okay, so I'm back up.

[Jason]

Yes. You have a crystal ball and an NBA backboard.

[Mike]

I'm going to take contact lenses.

[Andy]

Come on, man. That was the only thing left on my list I liked. They're incredible.

[Mike]

Yeah. Also very clear.

[Andy]

They have to be.

[Jason]

Are they incredible as more of a mythology to you because you can't wear them, so they seem more special than they really are.

[Andy]

No, I think that they're pretty cool, man. You can put it inside your eyelid and that. It's okay. That.

[Jason]

That's.

[Andy]

That's fine.

[Mike]

And it, for the most part, stays in place, just hugs your eyeball even

[Andy]

while you move your eye. And then you can see. And now your vision's fine. It blows my mind.

[Jason]

Now, this is. Today was the day that you learned that when they give you an iv, they don't put a needle, then keep the needle into your vein.

[Andy]

I didn't know that until today. And honestly, a lot of people listening are about to learn that, because even at our lunch table, there were a handful of us that were unaware. I always thought that the needle goes in the IV and then stays there and they tape it down and whatever, but apparently when they put the needle in, it's more like a catheter. They take the needle out and they just leave a little tube in there.

[Jason]

It's a soft, flexible little tube.

[Andy]

Oh, it still makes me cringe, but that is so much better.

[Mike]

It's impressive.

[Jason]

It will help your future.

[Andy]

I think if I ever have to get an IV again, it will not hurt it.

[Mike]

It will help.

[Andy]

But I will still be a big baby.

[Jason]

All right. Contact lenses. Mike. Jason, you have water and a large cube of ice.

[Andy]

Great picks, man. Great picks.

[Jason]

And you said you have so many others on your list of clear things that you're in love with.

[Andy]

So many that I could go with. I have four different options on the rest of my list.

[Mike]

Well, you only need two of clear.

[Andy]

Yeah. So I could double up. How many rounds we want to go

[Jason]

just a large circle of ice.

[Andy]

I'm gonna go with something that protects us every day. I'm going with the car windshield.

[Mike]

Oh.

[Andy]

Because without it.

[Jason]

Yeah, it's okay.

[Mike]

I thought you were going a little bit bigger there, but.

[Jason]

Yeah, me too. Me too.

[Andy]

Well, like, how much bigger?

[Jason]

Well, we'll tell you after the answer.

[Andy]

No, just tell me what you thought.

[Mike]

I was gonna pick a lot bigger. A lot bigger.

[Jason]

Significantly bigger.

[Andy]

Yeah, it's like, big as the world.

[Mike]

Yeah, yeah, that one.

[Andy]

Like, still don't know what it is. Atmosphere well, yeah. Clear.

[Mike]

Yeah, it's sort of like that, but it's around there.

[Andy]

Oxygen.

[Mike]

Oh, yeah. Strength two.

[Andy]

Okay.

[Jason]

He's looking for something other than whatever number four on that list is.

[Mike]

I don't know if we're doing a bit.

[Andy]

I think Mike thought it was oxygen.

[Mike]

No, no, no.

[Andy]

Okay.

[Jason]

We're both.

[Mike]

Okay. We're not doing a bit.

[Andy]

He doesn't know what. I don't.

[Mike]

I don't have a clue.

[Andy]

I wonder if the listeners know.

[Mike]

Oh, they know.

[Jason]

I hope they know.

[Andy]

I hope they know. I hope it's your next Deucer's Alley.

[Jason]

Raise a raise of hands if you're in.

[Mike]

All right. The young buck doesn't know it protects.

[Jason]

Well, he has less than we had.

[Mike]

Or. No, we're fixing it.

[Jason]

Oh, yeah.

[Andy]

Oh, my gosh. I have no idea what this is. You better take Falcon and. I have no idea.

[Mike]

Take something else. Just take your pick.

[Andy]

Give me Sprite. It's clear. Whatever. That's fine.

[Jason]

Mike can decide if he wants to take it.

[Mike]

I. It wasn't even on my list.

[Jason]

I know. I think we pass on.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[Andy]

Okay.

[Mike]

I just let you know in a moment.

[Andy]

I know how.

[Mike]

We'll let you know.

[Andy]

I know how the Falcon is feeling right now and how a lot of people driving are feeling.

[Jason]

Like.

[Andy]

What is the thing.

[Mike]

Look, I got one left over now I'm going to take packing tape.

[Andy]

You should have mocked.

[Jason]

You should have taken the other one that we were just saying.

[Andy]

My perfectly clear, large cube ice.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Andy]

You took packing tape. What is wrong with packaging tape?

[Jason]

Nothing's wrong with this. It's pretty lame.

[Mike]

Oh, okay.

[Jason]

I mean, it's cool. It works. It's sticky, but it's not. Not boring.

[Mike]

Yeah. Okay.

[Jason]

Are you pretty into it?

[Mike]

Packing tape is fun. Okay, look, I mean, you can, like, you could take a box, right? You can close that box and then you can make sure it doesn't open. I got it. And you can barely even see that something's holding it closed.

[Jason]

Okay.

[Andy]

Because it's so clear. I'll be honest with you. I can 100% of the time tell when packing tape's on a box, but it's clear.

[Mike]

How do you see it?

[Andy]

Yeah. And yet you can still tell.

[Mike]

Oh, man.

[Jason]

Well, I'll close it out with clear skies. I'm gonna take clear skies. Is that. Is that appropriate? I didn't know if it would get in there.

[Andy]

I don't give a crap.

[Mike]

But the sky, you can Take is blue.

[Andy]

You could take the sun for all I care. I don't care. Black Polos. Fine by me.

[Jason]

I'll close it out with clear sky. Clear skies today. I mean, no clouds. No, no, I know what it means. Pollution.

[Mike]

So, like, I could have gone, like, clear. Clear head.

[Al]

Yeah.

[Jason]

No, I mean, clear head's not an expression. And it's something you look at. Clear. Deucers can decide. I don't care. I got other stuff I'm not living on.

[Al]

I'm with Jason on this one.

[Andy]

You don't care, Mike.

[Jason]

I don't care.

[Al]

I will say, if clear skies is a pick, clear headed would also be legit.

[Jason]

Oh, clear headed.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Jason]

I thought you said a clear head.

[Andy]

No, I was like a clear head. No one could see through anyone's head.

[Jason]

So, wait, do we have any Papa Josh, why don't you tell the people.

[Mike]

We don't care.

[Jason]

Tell the people. The one that he didn't figure out. Air.

[Andy]

No, ozone. Thank you.

[Jason]

The ozone layer.

[Andy]

I said the atmosphere.

[Mike]

But that's not. The atmosphere is not the ozone layer.

[Andy]

But I wanted it all. I wanted all of the layers.

[Jason]

Some other considerations. Glasses or sunglasses?

[Mike]

Sure.

[Andy]

I'm so disappointed with Jello. I was waiting for some big reveal.

[Jason]

Jello.

[Andy]

Jello is red.

[Jason]

It's clear.

[Andy]

Jello is always red.

[Jason]

That's not even true.

[Mike]

I'm going to have to go with Jello is red. Yeah, but it's clear.

[Jason]

You can see through Jello.

[Mike]

It's got.

[Andy]

Wait, you're saying that if you can see through something, it's clear?

[Jason]

Yeah.

[Andy]

That's not the definition of clear.

[Mike]

Yeah, no, that's transparent. Clear skies is being explained right now. Yeah.

[Jason]

So then in that case, clear is. No color film is clear or not clear because you can hold it up and look through it.

[Andy]

Yeah. I would say that's translucent SAP.

[Mike]

No SAP.

[Andy]

SAP is definitely not clear.

[Jason]

You can see through it.

[Andy]

That's. You don't know what transparent and clear are? Those are two different words. Transparent means you can't. At the end of the draft, first

[Jason]

of all, I must have picked four good ones first. Second of all, clear. Like, when I look for clear things. These were on the list. That's. I mean, clear.

[Andy]

When I. When I asked for a list of things from the Internet, I found many things that were on the list that I did not add to my list because I was like, oh, that's not clear.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Like a Ziploc.

[Jason]

I got away with murder here.

[Mike]

Saran Wrap.

[Jason]

Yeah.

[Andy]

Yeah.

[Jason]

Are you. Although weird.

[Al]

Am I I would say something that is transparent is clear.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Al]

That's literally the definition of transparent.

[Jason]

That's right.

[Andy]

That's the definition of transparent. Yes. Not the definition.

[Mike]

Clear is like an absence of color. You can just see right through it.

[Jason]

We don't even know what we're drafting.

[Mike]

Oh, man. Start over.

[Al]

So you're saying like, a glass of beer. That's not clear.

[Andy]

Correct.

[Jason]

That is clear.

[Mike]

No, it's yellow.

[Al]

You can see through to the other side of it.

[Andy]

Oh, so it's transparent.

[Mike]

That's clear.

[Jason]

This is. This is.

[Al]

It is also transparent.

[Jason]

So, like, when you get one glass of beer and you can see through it and one that you can't, you go, oh, this one looks clear.

[Mike]

So, like a sheer piece of fabric. Mm. You can see through that. That's clear.

[Andy]

Is that clear?

[Jason]

No, that's foggy.

[Al]

That's translucent.

[Jason]

Translucent. Yeah. Thanks, Al.

[Mike]

But you get. Okay.

[Jason]

The only thing that's not clear are these definitions.

[Mike]

Oh, here you go. Josh says clear means that you can see through it, and it is colorless.

[Andy]

There you go.

[Mike]

Transparent means you can see objects through it. But it may be.

[Andy]

So that's like what we were saying.

[Jason]

I lucked into picking for actually clear things.

[Mike]

Yes, you.

[Jason]

And didn't get to the bottom of the list because packing tape and some of these other ones got me there. Okay, well, good.

[Andy]

I'll jump in here.

[Jason]

I learned that clear needs to be colorless.

[Mike]

Yeah. I learned that once upon a time. Jason was charming.

[Andy]

Yeah. I learned. I learned that you guys think ozone is better than atmosphere, which makes no sense because I got it all. I had the ozone in it.

[Mike]

Did you take atmosphere?

[Andy]

No, I was trying to guess. You said, oh, that's not. It's better.

[Jason]

He went with Sprite. Goodbye, everybody.

[Mike]

Goodbye.

[Al]

Thanks for listening to the Spitballers Podcast.

[Andy]

To see what other nonsense the guys

[Al]

are up to, check out spitballerspod.com.